Why You Shouldn’t Care What People Think… According to Philosophers

Marcus Aurelius faced many challenges as a Roman  Emperor, from ruling a vast empire to dealing with wars and personal struggles. One particular  hardship he wrote about in his Meditations was dealing with difficult people. On a daily basis,  he had to deal with people who were unkind, ungrateful, arrogant, dishonest, jealous, and  so forth.

Marcus Aurelius was also a devoted practitioner of Stoicism. This (originally)  Greek philosophy helped him deal with these unpleasant encounters by focusing on what  was in his power instead of lamenting other people’s opinions and dislikes. He wrote: Someone despises me.

That’s their problem. Mine: not to do or say anything despicable.  Someone hates me.

Their problem. Mine: to be patient and cheerful with everyone,  including them. Ready to show them their mistake.

Not spitefully, or to show off my own  self-control, but in an honest, upright way. End quote. Being mindful of others is vital for a pleasant and well-functioning society.

We  must consider other people’s needs and well-being; we’re ultimately interdependent; we need each  other. However, we could also be too occupied with other people’s thoughts and actions  to the point that they become a source of continual suffering. For example, we could  be deeply hurt by some people’s political views.

Or we could feel offended by someone  insulting us or acting contrary to our values. However, as a Stoic, Marcus Aurelius intended not  to let himself be harmed by people’s thoughts and actions—it would obstruct his ability to  live virtuously. Also, even though he was the mightiest person in the known world, he was  aware that his power was limited; he couldn’t even control the opinions and actions of those  close to him.

He realized that feeling hurt over what he couldn’t control was unreasonable. As for today, being hurt by other people’s opinions and actions remains a struggle we all  face, especially in a world so polarized. Luckily, the philosophers of old shared valuable  insights that could protect us from being harmed by people’s toxicity,  stupidity, and short-sightedness.

This video explores why we shouldn’t care what  people think, according to philosophers. If you want to support Einzelgänger, consider  joining my Patreon page, which allows access to ad-free videos and free merch. Also, follow me  on Facebook and Instagram for updates and quotes.

Thank you, and I hope you’ll enjoy this video. Diogenes of Sinope was an ancient Greek Cynic philosopher who lived in a barrel and had  distanced himself from material possessions. In clear daylight, he strolled around the  marketplace with a lantern, claiming he was looking for a “man” (by which he meant an honest  person, contrary to the people around him whom he viewed as dishonest and irrational).

Diogenes was known for his total disregard for social conventions. He didn’t care about the  search for status and money people were engaged in. He didn’t care about looking good in the  eyes of others.

People called him a ‘dog,’ as he behaved like one and praised a dog’s ‘virtues. ’  Dogs eat and make love in public, walk barefoot, and sleep wherever they want. They’re shameless. 

Diogenes liked the shamelessness of dogs; it made them authentic and not “hypocritical”  as, he believed, most people are. Dogs are generally indifferent to what people  think of them. Have you ever seen a dog feel ashamed after laying a turd in the middle of  the road?

Have you ever seen a dog offended by someone laughing at him? Will a dog be disturbed  by people’s political views? Not really.

A dog simply “dogs,” not overcomplicating things, not  regarding all these man-made ideas and rules. The cynics were a cult of indifference. Their  disregard for material possessions, status, and other people’s opinions lay at the core of  their philosophy (if you could even call it one), as they believed not being fettered to these  things is where true happiness can be found.

You shouldn’t be concerned by other people’s opinions  because if you are, these people have power over you. Diogenes’ profound indifference, therefore,  made him invincible. He couldn’t even care less what Alexander the Great thought of him, which was  shocking considering the many sycophants generally surrounding such a powerful man kissing his ass.

Let’s go to the next philosopher who believes one shouldn’t care too much about  what other people think: Arthur Schopenhauer If he had listened to  the people around him, particularly his mother,  Arthur Schopenhauer would have never become the great pessimistic philosopher people admire today.  His mother criticized his pessimistic worldview, and once, she wrote that he was “irritating  and unbearable” and “highly annoying”. Ironically, his dark, pessimistic ideas, which  his mother loathed, later made him so admired.

He created a philosophy that still speaks to  people today by staying authentic. Whenever I read Schopenhauer’s Studies in Pessimism,  I chuckle because of his miserable but lucid outlook on existence. From his viewpoint,  the German philosopher tells it how it is; he doesn’t sugarcoat anything.

He rationally  explains why the world is despicable and why we’d be better off not existing. Similar  to Buddhist views, Schopenhauer thought life is suffering. Because of this irrational driving  force, which he called the ‘will to live,’ we’re doomed to experience an insatiable striving that  often embodies desires that aren’t very rational.

One of these strivings is trying to be  highly esteemed in the eyes of others, which Schopenhauer saw as a “peculiar weakness of  human nature. ” He pointed out that this tendency to care so much about other people’s opinions  brings more unhappiness than happiness. Sure, people’s approval brings a smile to one’s face  for a while, but it’s paid for by peace of mind and independence; after all, impressing people  takes work, and the more we care about it, the more dependent we are on their  opinions.

Moreover, argues Schopenhauer, this validation we’re seeking is often baseless,  as people are generally poor judges. I quote: The only way of putting an end to this universal  folly is to see clearly that it is a folly; and this may be done by recognizing the fact that  most of the opinions in men’s heads are apt to be false, perverse, erroneous and absurd, and so  in themselves unworthy of attention; further, that other people’s opinions can have very little  real and positive influence upon us in most of the circumstances and affairs of life. End quote.

Now, let’s move on to the next philosopher who  believed we shouldn’t put so much emphasis on other people’s opinions: Epictetus Once, Epictetus encountered a poor guy who  tried to convince the people around him he didn’t deserve their pity). The man tried to  teach them that they pitied him for things they shouldn’t pity him for, such as poverty and lack  of status, stating that these things aren’t bad. But Epictetus quickly pointed out that trying  to convince people of good and evil is a vain pursuit; even Zeus cannot do it, so why did he  try?

Yet, the man wanted these people to have a better opinion of him. So, if he couldn’t  convince them not to pity him for being poor and of low status, maybe he could pretend to be  a high-status person to gain their approval. But Epictetus reminded him of the means  necessary to achieve this facade: he had to borrow a bunch of slaves, possess a couple of  luxury items, and show them off often.

He had to act rich and distinguished, dine and hang out with  upper-class people, trying to emulate their ways: all that effort just to avoid pity and contempt. Epictetus explained to him the absurdity of trying to convince others while not having  convinced the only person he can truly convince: himself. Only his own opinions, pursuits, and  attitudes were up to him.

The only way to cease suffering from pain and turmoil (in this case,  that people looked down on him) is by giving up things that lie outside the sphere of moral  purpose, in other words, outside of his control, and casting them aside. Epictetus told the man: To what class of things, then, does another’s opinion about you belong? —To that which lies  outside the sphere of the moral purpose.

—And so it is nothing to you? —Nothing. End quote.

What people do and think is ultimately not  in our control, and according to Epictetus, such things shouldn’t be a prime concern. The  Stoic philosopher’s view is valuable in today’s society, characterized by outrage, people with  short fuses, and a lack of overall tolerance towards ‘the other. ’ People are fighting each  other, often anonymously, over different views.

Some seek to impose their views on others, some  throw insults and slurs, and others feel deeply hurt by the ideas of their political opponents.  But let’s face it: aren’t we wasting our time? The next philosopher was very passionate  about non-conformity and following one’s authentic path: Ralph Waldo Emerson Ralph Waldo Emerson was an American  transcendentalist philosopher, also known as the champion of individualism and critical thinking. 

His essay Self-Reliance calls on individuals to trust themselves when choosing their paths. According to Emerson, we should avoid conforming to the judgments and expectations of others, as  overvaluing other people’s opinions prevents us from living authentically. “Imitation is suicide,”  stated Emerson, meaning that by copying others and conforming to societal norms, we kill our  individuality and unique potential.

He believed each individual possesses a unique inner guiding  light, an inner voice telling us where to go. Emerson viewed the inner voice as a divine  spark, or “over-soul,” representing the God within us. For him, self-reliance meant  prioritizing this inner guidance over the opinions of others.

Each individual has unique  experiences that only they can fully understand, as the divine plan is uniquely tailored  to each person’s life. He wrote: Trust thyself: every heart vibrates to that  iron string. Accept the place the divine providence has found for you, the society of  your contemporaries, the connection of events.

End quote. Like Schopenhauer, Emerson believed that people’s opinions often change  and are shaped by shallow factors, making them untrustworthy. They are “put on and off as the  wind blows and a newspaper directs,” he wrote.

Instead of being tossed around by these often  unfounded, superficial, and transient opinions of others, it’s better to develop inner strength  and trust in one’s own voice. We should rise above public opinion. Let others be sheep.

Speaking  of sheep, we’ll conclude this video with another philosopher—an admirer of Emerson—who also valued  authenticity and despised herd mentality: Friedrich Nietzsche Friedrich Nietzsche’s idea of the ‘overman’ (or Übermensch) urges us to rise  above mediocrity and create our own values. The overman breaks free from societal standards,  conventional morality, and herd mentality. In Thus Spoke Zarathustra, Nietzsche compares  humanity to a rope stretched across an abyss—a dangerous crossing from beast to overman.

This  journey requires courage, self-overcoming, and letting go of the comforts that keep us  tied to conformity. Like domesticated sheep, the masses cling to safety, consumerism,  and group ideals that prevent individuals from excelling and becoming who they are. As Nietzsche predicted, many people today have turned into what he called “last men.

” They’re  mainly occupied by seeking short-term pleasures, and their lives don’t amount to anything. In our  times, people seem to be lived by corporations, telling them what to like and consume, which  leads to many feeling empty. The cure for this emptiness is always to consume more.

According to Nietzsche, to prevent nihilism, one should break free from the herd and forge a  path of continual becoming and self-overcoming, the authentic path of the overman. Of course,  as with anyone who dares to be different, one can expect ridicule, anger, pity,  contempt, and being misunderstood, which, as philosophers such as Epictetus and  Schopenhauer also pointed out, are the price to pay for a better life. Thank you for watching.