O ENCONTRO DO TOBI E KONAN (ANIMAÇÃO/PARÓDIA)

Heyo! Your piece of ---! So, Wasup!

? Yeah, guys. .

. WELCOME TO THE VOICE MAKERS RETURN, MATE! YOU GUYS HAVE NO IDEA.

. . OUR PEOPLE HAVE PREPARED A LOT OF STUFF FOR YOU!

THE WHOLE THING IS INSANE! I know, I already saw it. And, pay attention!

In the end of this video, before the credits, there will be a cool surprise, huh! ? You'd better stay and watch.

But I know you'll stay, after all, I know you guys always stay till the end to see the credits and post-credits, right? Right. I know you're not a PIECE OF SH*T that skips the credits, right?

Right. Alright. I'll wait for you at the end of the video, Ok!

? So. .

. Let's go to the video. HEY DJ!

Bring it on! Yeah, that's right. You gone soft, Nemo-nee.

You were clowing around with me. Clown fish-nee. .

. I've always been a fan of Bruce, the shark. Now let's send it to tummy, nee?

Delicious sandwi- KISAME, FOR GOD'S SAKE. I NEED TO TALK TO YOU, DUDE! I NEED HELP- What's this?

Sandwich? Man, I was really hungry. Then, there was a thing.

. . Sh*t!

What a nasty sandwich! Looks like there's raw fish in here. Crap!

But anyway, I was telling you, something happened. . .

an important subject. You need to know! Fu**!

Son of a b*tc*, nee. Exactly! That's what I thought, you know!

? I was nervous, so I said to myself: "Holysh**. Fu** this sh*t.

" Stop it! Where are your balls? YOUR BALLS!

Quit the crap, man! It's Konan, Kisame. It's Konan.

She agreed to go out with me and I'm. . .

and. . .

so. . .

I was imagining how can it be. . .

. . .

I was wanting a consultancy. . .

a conversation like that, with someone, you know? You're nervous and need advice, nee? No, I'm not nervous!

Not nervous! You think I get nervous, huh? - Man, I'm cold-blooded, bro-- - You're shitting yourself!

OK! I'm shitting on my pants, yes! What's the problem?

I can't be! ? It's a whole new thing for me, man!

Bro, it's been more than 18 years old that I don't feel a woman's touch, Kisame! The last time I felt it, she was dying in my arms! YOU KNOW HOW TRAUMATIC IS THAT IT, KISAME?

WELL, OF COURSE I'M NERVOUS! Nee? Anyway, oh: I'm thinking of taking her to a nice, cool place, not too expensive, nice food, a fullhouse like that, you know?

Are you sure? Of course, Kisame. A fullhouse reveals who we really are.

There's no frills. no fru fru fru, fri fri, no! It's that bread and that giant meat in the size of your face, a kilo of ketchup, and anyway, Man, so good Much better than that shitty sandwich of yours you bought there.

I made it, nee. Did you made--? Oh, no.

It wasn't that bad, was it? It's just- It's just that I don't like fish, huh? But then, give me some advice.

I think you have to do what you have to do, and that's it. YOU'RE RIGHT, KISAME! I'm taking her to a fancy restaurant, expensive as hell, I'm gonna fuck with my wallet, but it'll be worth it!

Fullhouse? My as* You have to do something to make her happy, even if makes me completely unhappy. This is how it works the relationships, Right, Kisame?

Say the word. That's exactly how it is, nee. So, Pain.

Follow my lead: Here it is the profit sharing. One to the firm, one for me. Two for the firm.

One, two for me. Three to the firm, One, two, three for me. Are you following throw, right?

S-sort of. Four for you. One, two, three, four for me.

Wait, I think something's wrong. What's the problem? Do you want to count it then?

Yes, I do. No, you won't. Just let me do this.

Let's go again. Hey, Nagat- I mean, Pain. I need to talk to you.

Another time, Konan. I'm checking out the firm's profit sharing. WHAT THE F*CK!

? ARE YOU CRAZY! ?

Now, Pain. What is it, Konan? Is it about Tuesday?

I've already said that I'm not forget the toilet paper and having to call you for help ever again! No. It's not about that.

It's about Madara. What about him? So.

. . he asked me out on a date, but I'm not sure.

You know? Because we're from the same firm and all. .

. He's our boss, they're different roles, so I. .

. You did right thing, Konan. I'm glad you refused it down to maintain professionalism.

No, I accepted but--- - YOU WHAT? - Wha-? B-but Konan, what about Yahiko?

What do you mean? In respect of my best friend, I can't let you go on with that. Girl.

. . Think about Yahiko.

Hey, Nagato. Yahiko's dead. It's been years.

How dare you? He lives through from me, okay? No, Nagato.

You literally only controls his corpse. In a matter of fact, it's very strange, I'm standing here talking to the corpse of the guy I liked, about the guy who I'm going out with. I'm starting to get a little.

. . Yeah!

Don't we have another Pain to talk? No, we don't. Then turn around!

I don't want to stay looking at this face of yours. Unbelievable. So, is that it's been a while since I don't interact with someone.

. . it's been over 15 years since I don't feel a man's touch, Nagato.

And the last time I felt it he was dead in my arms. I DIDN'T MEAN TO! WAS HE'S FAULT!

I know, and it was horrible! Do you know how traumatic was to see that? I know.

I'm the one who I took the stab. If there's anyone who knows how traumatic it was, it's me. Anyway, do I try to be more, I don't know, sweet?

I don't know. Should I be myself? You know?

Myself isn't that cool. All myself. .

. ! Konan.

. . my love!

It's me, Yahiko. I'm alive. Don't go out with Tobi.

Ugh! Oh, my therapist. .

. It's fuc** up. I have clothes for sh*t!

I even brought some from back home, but I don't know which one to use. That's why I called you here. And what do I have to do with this?

Man! You're not the guy who people think is handsome? The girls are like: Oh, cute little Itachi, Give me a kiss!

So, you must know something thing about how to suit yourself up, huh? All right. But I'm warning you this area is not my strong suit.

Nice! And then, what do you do you think about this one? I was wearing it when I killed my sensei.

Miss that. Look, I loved how the fabric is light, and is lined with this dark purple, gives a contrast of seriousness, but at the same time, elegance. The color of the mask stands out quite a bit.

The yellow in the purple and black always stands out. It's a combination that works well in nocturnal places, especially in cold seasons. Man.

. . !

So I'm supposed to wear it? Yeah, I think it's interesting. All right, then.

Man, that was quick- Wait a minute, wait a minute! What's that! ?

You got a big hole on your back! Man. .

. This. .

. Paddock fucker! It's not even a frog, man.

Hey! I called you here because you're a man of multiple opinions. And you can also see by more than one point of view, right?

- I agree. - I disagree. So, what do you do you think of this one?

I used a long time ago. . .

Ah. . .

Nice. . .

- It's the same thing as akatsuki! - It's the same thing as akatsuki. Yeah, yeah.

I'll see another one. Oh, I like this one. It gives off a cool vibe, a pirocidal energy, like this.

You know what I'm saying? What do you think? Hmm.

. . The colors are well distributed, the fabric is heavier, but it is visibly of high quality.

So, in fact, gives me a pirocidal energy, but the shade of orange of your mask. . .

does not go well with this saffron greyish violet. They're two colors that, like this, they don't talk. Lose the harmony.

WAIT. I know what to do. .

. Look! How about this one?

Oh, Man. . .

But that one is so lifeless, negative energy, you know? Perfect, pretty color! Oh, you think so?

- No. - Yes. Guys, anytime you guys have to make up your mind!

Man, I loved that outfit so much, which I'll save for another time. But here's this one. Check out the style.

I used it when I was a kid, was fashionable at the time. The girls would get all on top, I was a hit! Kakashi was there in the corner sucking my thumb, that assho**!

I thought Kakashi was popular as a child. No. Loser!

Jealous as fuc*! Oh, I get it. But anyway.

. . Let's get it over with.

All right, Okay, girl. . .

let's get a move on with that, shall we? Let's give this one a makeover. What the fuc* is that!

? Why are you talking like that? Hey, this is not how a designer speaks?

I don't know, for fuc*'s sake! TOBI & KONAN: THE DATE You look beautiful. I loved the y-y your outfit.

You look very nice. My what? Really?

No, come on. Yeah, it's really pretty, huh? But about you, I loved your hair!

Is it bluer or is it me? No! Nothing to it, Obito.

Holy sh*t! You can do it better than that. Hi, Tobi.

OK, she's here! Nice. Stay calm.

This is going to be a peace of ca--- WOW! Wow, you're dressed, I loved the pretty face. I mean, Y-your eyes are just like your face.

I mean. . .

Would you like a sit? Yeah, I do. And your clothes Are very pretty too.

Oh, thank you. Itachi helped me choose. Nice, huh?

What the fuc* is that! ? - Pull you.

- Okay. - How'd it go--? - Beautiful place.

- Oh, I'm sorry, you can talk. - No, no, you can talk. - No, no, seriously, talk to me.

- It was no big deal, what were you going to ask? No, I wasn't going to ask you anything, - Were you going to talk about the place? - No, no.

Ah. - So, how-- - But then, lug-- Oh, Fuc*! - What were you going to say?

-No, not at all. Were you going to say something? No big deal.

I wanted to to know what you were going to say. No, I wouldn't. You would, wouldn't you?

No, no. I wasn't going to ask anything. Ah.

. . - What do you want to eat?

- Hm, I'm still thinking about it. You can order up first. All right.

So, you see me one Nice steak, you waiter. But it's steak done right way, you see? Underdone meat, bloody, hot.

If you bring me a well-done, ashy meat, fucked up and tasteless shi*, I'm gonna shove that tray here where the sun doesn't shine, Ok? Y-yes sir. .

. And you, madam, what will you ask? Wow, I just remembered: Ever since I was a little girl, I always wanted to go in a fancy restaurant to eat some Caviar.

Oh, I'm on it. ♪I've never seen it, nor eaten, I just hear about it. ♫ The music, man.

. . Yeah, that's right.

I always wanted to. It's like a childhood dream of mine, you know? I'm sorry, ma'am.

We don't have Caviar. - Yes, you do. - No, we don't.

- Yes, you do. - What do you mean? - Yes, you do!

Look here at the menu. - Where? Oh.

. . Yes, sir.

We have caviar, yes. See that? He goes there get the caviar, He's going to arrange, in a one way or another.

Right, huh? Go on, go. - Ah.

So, nice. - Uhum, nice! - Hm.

- Hm. Speak up something man She's looking at my ass-face! She must think I'm boring as hell!

Speak up, Obito. Say something! - Oh, here's the thing.

. . - What are you doing here?

- I'm helping you! - No! No, it's not!

Oh, but I am a suitcase really, huh? The guy's right there in front of me, with that c*ck-face. He must find me insufferable.

Oh, dear. Find any Subject, Konan! Stop being such an pussy.

- I'd like to see if it were you here! - Interacting without the headset is very difficult. Call her to dance macarena.

- No, fuc*er! - And he's acting weird, moving his head around. My God, did I pass too much deodorant!

? Tell her her armpit smells good. - WHAT?

- Hey? No, not at all! - Your armpit smells good!

- My God! Oh, thank you. Yours.

. . too?

Thank you. Want to smell? DON'T DO THAT, FOR FUCK'S SAKE!

Is it for sniffing or not? NO! You were going to sniff?

Sorry about that. It's just that I'm not very. .

. going out style, you know? Interacting.

. . and also, this double like I live, tiple sometimes, left me kind of stranded.

There were so many traumas that I got lost in character. I'm sorry, okay? I don't want to either.

. . No, no.

It's okay. I super understandable. I don't go out either with anyone since.

. . never.

And from traumas, I have a full luggage. - Oh, yeah? - You have no idea.

Oh, it can't be any worse than me. - Man, I'm an orphan. - Whatev-- - I mean, so what?

So am I. - That's right, who in this cartoon isn't, right? Girl, I was a nobody.

No one in my clan liked me. Me too, and I was starving kid. Really?

I was a kid-soldier, forced to fight in the war, seeing a lot of misery with 13 years old only. Uh, traumatizing! Really?

But check it out: I was a child affected by the war. I lived in the middle of the battle and saw a lot of doom and gloom. But man, oh.

Look this. . .

There's no way you can top that. The guy that I loved died in front of me, man! WHAT?

THE GIRL I LIKED TOO DIED RIGHT IN FRONT OF ME. MY GOD! MINE WAS KILLED BY MY FRIEND.

MINE WAS KILLED BY MY FRIEND TOO. - Ah, but mine threw itself into the attack. - BULL-SH*T!

MINE TOO, MAN! We have a lot in common. Yeah, right.

Oh, too much misery! Yeah, right? We really are all fucked up, huh?

Hey, guys. . .

Has he kissed her? No, actually, they're crying, nee. - What the fuc* is that?

- What? But I'm the one who cries. Well done.

Did you know that date would be a bit**. Stop cursing, you son of a bit**! Sorry about the subject.

I didn't mean to pull those fuddy-duddy memories. It's okay. Life it's a piece of sh*t anyway.

Your caviar, Madame. Oh, thank you. And man, does it look like you went to pick it up yourself, like, at the sea.

I went! Wow, I'm really curious to try it. It's a childhood dream that I have, you know?

Oh, my. . .

It sucks! Holy sh*t! Oh, boy.

You didn't like it, did you? Oh, boy. It's my fault.

I should have picked a better place for us to eat. Oh, it's okay. .

. Oh, I know! What do you say we go get some fullhouse?

WHAT! ? Yeah, just around the corner.

I saw one on my way in. Cheap, tasty food. What the.

. . !

? What do you mean! ?

Do you like fullhouse? Of course, the fullhouse reveals who we really are! Oh, boy.

. . Here, my renegade.

. . Come with me.

With pleasure, Lord Madara. Hey, Konan. .

. call me Obito. - Who?

- Long story. Long story. I'll tell you on the way.

- So, did you kiss? - Actually. .

. They're leaving. That's good.

Good to see it all went wrong. And if they have going to the motel? Let's follow them!

Hey, bro. I'm telling you. .

. HEY, DUDE. FOR REAL, BEST PLACE YOU GOT!

JESUS, MAN! THE OIL IS RUNNING OUT HERE! HOLY***!

OH, YEAH! PROTEIN! But damn it, Obito.

. . spend his whole life undercover, lying to everything and everyone.

Taking on a lot of roles, you know. . .

It's hard not to be sequeled anyway. Yeah. .

. you've got to have a lot of hustle and bustle to play these people. .

. It's very. .

. It's very. .

. tiring. .

. sometimes, you know. .

. With me you don't you need to pretend anymore. .

. You can be yourself, Obito. So.

. . for you.

. . I'll be Obito.

Wow! Damn! Hit her, masked one!

Tongue and all, nee! Ah, now they're going to the motel, nee? SON OF A BIT**!

Hold it! Hold it! Hold him down!

- Hold him down! - Easy, chefin! Let him go!

I wanna see the party! HOLY CRAAAAP NEEEEEE! DEIDARA-SENPAI, I'M SO HAPPY!

TOBI IS HAPPY! TOBI IS HAPPY! I'M SO HAPPY!

I promised I wouldn't ask, BUT YOU'RE A PAIN IN THE ASS ALL WEEK WITH THAT! HM! And it won't stop making noise in my ear!

- WHAT HAPPENED? HM! ?

- Ah, you have no idea, Deidara-senpai! But since you were so insistent, I'll tell! - Tobi's dating!

- Hm. You? Dating?

With your mental faculties? Hm. Yes, and I'm very happy!

Oh, my God in heaven! Hm! 507 Now I can die.

I saw everything! Hm! And who's the retard?

Hm! ? Konan.

Konan! ? Por**, you finally you made me laugh, Tobi.

Hm. Oh, come on. No fucking way.

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