A Powerful Technique To Seduce & Influence Anyone: Robert Greene

seduction is in high form of power if you're more seductive in your approach if you're more indirect people will do what you want or go in your direction without ever even realizing it what makes for a great Seducer is very simple I can summarize it very simple you mentioned seduction there The Art of Seduction why did you write a book about the topic of Seduction seduction is in a high form of power because you make people feel pleasure you make them feel excited or interested in you and then their their resistance to your ideas slowly

lowers and you have the ability to influence them and to move them in the direction that you want if you yell at them like how we talk about your child and you tell them do this do that they resent it and for good reason but if you're subtler if you're more seductive in your approach if you're more indirect people will do what you want or go in your direction without ever even realizing it so it was a sub theme in the 48 Laws of Power and so I was sort of interested in the psychology of

that and why some people are good at it and some people are awkward about it so when I finish the 48 Laws of Power I thought this would be a natural Segway the next book what are the qualities of a great Seducer well I'd like to distinguish between cold seducers and warm seducers a cold Seducer is something you don't want to be that's the typical image that we might have of a male Seducer but even of a female Seducer like the great courtesans and set up with her just after money or the men are just

after sex that's not my ideal my ideal is kind of a back and forth quality where it's not domination it's sort of like a game that you're playing it's like a mating game it's like a courtship ritual where both part people are kind of seducing each other and so what makes for a great Seducer is very simple I can summarize it very simply you are outer directed so when you meet somebody for the first time or you're on a date or whatever it is you're not having that internal monologue going does she like me or

does he like me might dress well am I saying stupid things what can I do to impress them no you turn it off and you're outer directed and you're listening to them and you're entering their spirit and you're hearing them say things that that give you idea of what they're missing in life of what they want of what their needs are of what makes them an individual you're absorbing it you're entering into their spirit and then you can reflect it back to them you can give them gifts you can take them to places that show

that you're attentive to them because if you look at how we are in our day-to-day life normally people never pay us attention they're always so self-absorbed they're never thinking about us they're you I've been the times where you get the sense that people are actually interested in who you are as an individual is pretty rare if you give that feeling to someone it's incredibly powerful because we all want to be validated we all want to be recognized so the Seducer is not someone who's all worried about him him or herself and thinking they're involved in

the other person they're absorbed like a sponge inside their psychology inside their world a lot of this is you know very applicable to romance and dating etc etc it feels for whatever reason I you know not necessarily something I've read much about in your work but it feels like dating and romance and relationships have become much more complicated in the modern world that it's become much more difficult to seduce somebody um what is the what are the attributes of someone then that is not good at seducing anti-seducer has many qualities I have a whole chapter

on the anti-seducer I try and Define it uh there there are several of them I can't I don't have them all memorized but one quality that's very anti-seductive is preaching and moralizing is like telling people oh that's wrong what you just said or your politics are ugly or you're not a really you're not really good at this or something or other having a moral superiority a sense of sanctimonious sanctimony in a realm which should be about pleasure or should be that kind of equality that kind of dinette back and forth Dynamic where you're asserting your

moral superiority is deeply deeply anti-seductive the element of preaching to people not being generous and I mean not just with money money is important but not being generous with your spirit right you want to be open you want to give as much as you can to the other person of yourself of your time of your money of your energy Etc so being all kind of crimped and I don't want to give I don't want to spend money I want to take you to the cheap place to eat I don't want to give you much time

it's very very anti-seductive when you were talking a second ago about the person who goes on the day and they're thinking about themselves and what they you know what their hair looks like or whatever else that spoke to an insecure person is insecurity a seductive quality or is it a anti-seductive quality it is anti-seductive now there is a part of weakness that is seductive so I would say vulnerability is seductive but insecurity is anti-seductive and there's a big difference why does vulnerability draw people to you because the sense so if I can Define seduction in

in in simple terms um most of the time we are closed to the influence of other people particularly now we have these walls up because life is Harsh people are coming at us with their advertisements with their pleas with their wanting money with this that and the other and we've all learned to be very defensive right and seduction is an openness is the opposite of that and you felt it when you were a child towards your parents you felt very vulnerable and open and and there was an element of your parents and how they treated

you that was very much like a seduction right so seduction is about being open to the other person to the extent where you can even fall in love you can fall under their spell and the sense of letting go of your ego letting go of your defensiveness and letting other another person enter your world is being seduced it requires vulnerability if you meet the typical um scenarios of a man who's not vulnerable at all he's so powerful and in control and everything has no vulnerabilities it's frightening you know for a woman it could be very

frightening like this he's he's so strong he's so invulnerable that there's something wrong about it you know maybe he's a serial killer maybe he's got skeletons in his closet something isn't right about that what what seduces you about a puppy about a child about an animal is their vulnerability it makes you want to hug them it makes you want to help them right the sense which If You Came Upon A a tiger that's there and that they don't need that well that's not seductive I mean on your screen it is but if they're there in

your living room that's not seductive but that puppy is Right vulnerability the sense that somebody needs protection or help brings out qualities in us that we don't normally have that I think allow for seduction so that is being vulnerable that is I can be influenced by that other person I am open to the to their Spirit right that's being vulnerable the word vulnerable I hate to sound like a professor so excuse me in seduction it comes from the wrong the root of it means a wound vuleness so you have a wound inside of you and

you need healing and the other person naturally wants to help you right but being insecure is the op means I'm so self-absorbed I'm so worried about myself that I can't get out of it and we've all had that experience when you meet somebody and they and you can sense you can smell their insecurity in them I'm not judging them because we all have insecurities it makes you feel insecure it makes you feel a little bit awkward whereas if you meet someone who's not like that who's confident Etc it brings out that quality in you so

if you're on a date and there's someone who's you smell that kind of insecurity it makes you awkward and insecure it creates a kind of a problem so that would be the difference between the two if you love the diver CEO brand and you watch this Channel please do me a huge favor become part of the 15 of the viewers on this channel that have hit the Subscribe button it helps us tremendously and the bigger the channel gets the bigger the guests [Music]