COMO APRENDER TER CALMA - Marco Aurélio e Epicteto - Estoicismo

Although they followed the same philosophy, Marcus Aurelius was emperor and Epictetus was born as a simple slave. This shows that Stoicism is not just for a privileged elite, but for all of us. A fundamental part of Stoic philosophy is the ability to keep the mind calm.

In fact, Stoics believe that we achieve true happiness and inner peace when we live in a state of flourishing and wholeness. If you want to take it easy, and incorporate this mental state into your daily life, I invite you to watch this video until the end. We will address three essential parts: In the first two, the thoughts and habits of Epictetus and Marcus Aurelius.

And, in the third part, I will present practical exercises to apply in your life. The journey to a serene and balanced mind begins now. And, if this is the first time we have met, here we talk about root Stoicism, in a very practical and applicable way.

So, like this video, leave your comment and subscribe to the channel. Thus, we have the opportunity to serve more people with this transformative knowledge. First part.

EPICTETUS. Epictetus, in his works, highlights that we should value tranquility above things like money, reputation and even our physical appearance. Epictetus teaches that mental calm is not the result of trying to control what happens around us, but is achieved through the way we choose to think.

His main work, the "Discourses", was transcribed by one of his most dedicated students, Arriano. He also compiled the "Epictetus Manual", an easy-to-read and understand book that was even used by soldiers before war conflicts. In these sources, we discover how Epictetus dealt with worries, stressful situations and everyday challenges.

This offers us valuable lessons on how to keep a calm mind, regardless of the adversities that life presents us with. Therefore, Stoic philosophy not only inspires us, but also provides us with practical tools to face life's turmoil with calm and serenity. Let's start with the first: Act in accordance with nature.

In one of his classes, one of his students told him that he wanted to go home because he was sick. Epictetus then sent him home. But first he asked his student about the appropriateness of his decision in relation to the moral purpose.

The lesson learned from this episode is clear: we must act according to the demands of the present situation. The path of the universe is beyond our control, and there is no need to force circumstances. When we are sick, Epictetus advises us not to impose ourselves on impossible tasks.

Instead, the best thing to do is often to accept the condition and act in a way that is sensible for our well-being at that particular moment. Epictetus also highlights that illness can be an obstacle to the body, but not to our ability to choose. This does not imply that we should insist on completing every task, which could make things worse.

It does mean, however, that despite physical challenges, we still have the ability to choose between emotional disorder and rational decisions. When applying this principle to situations such as intense family arguments or disagreements in relationships, Epictetus reminds us to avoid the extremes of the emotional and indifference. In the first case, people are overwhelmed by emotion, and in the second case people refuse to see the problem and, perhaps, try to appear tough.

Loss of calm can result in impulsive words, aggressive behavior, and hasty emotional decisions. This can harm communication and long-term stability of relationships. Acting according to nature begins when we recognize the reality of the situation and take necessary action with a balanced mind.

Regardless of how we choose to react, the essence is understanding that we do not control the actions of others, and our Stoic journey involves accepting these realities while maintaining serenity. And how we accept these realities leads us to the second principle: Watch your judgments. Epictetus teaches us to think carefully about our thoughts and judgments, especially in relation to the world around us.

He reminds us that anxiety doesn't come from the things that happen, but from the way we choose to view those situations. Each of us has a unique frame of reference from which we decide what we can and cannot accept. This is normal and often helps us distinguish what is right from what is wrong.

However, our judgments can become a problem when they make us feel entitled to things to which we are naturally not entitled. For example, we may be angry for the rest of our lives because we feel entitled to loving, devoted parents, but perhaps we didn't have that experience. But Epictetus tells us that we have the right to have parents and not to control their behavior and personality.

This idea applies to many aspects of life and it begs the question why we care about things that are completely natural? In the words of Epictetus: Distinguish in your own mind and be prepared to say: "It is not the accident that grieves this person, because it does not grieve another person, it is the judgment he makes about it. " This is especially useful when dealing with with difficult times, such as losing your job, the end of a relationship or when your family doesn't care about you.

When we observe a situation objectively, without letting our expectations or feelings affect our judgment, we become better able to cope logically with the circumstances. This prevents us from being dominated by irrational thoughts and emotions. Additionally, when we change our attitude and stop worrying excessively about what we cannot control, we begin to focus more on the things we can change.

This helps us helps you face life's challenges in a more balanced way and make progress, which leads us to explore the third principle: Focus less on things outside your control. At the beginning of Epictetus' Handbook we find the famous dichotomy of control, which is an essential concept of Stoic thought. This idea suggests that some things are in our control while others are not, and we should focus on what is in our control while leaving aside what is not.

As social human beings, we often desire to control the world around us using means such as money, power, physical strength, sexuality, intelligence, or influence. However, Epictetus reminds us that in the end, these are just instruments that can influence but never completely control. Even when we can control some things, there will always be a billion other things that slip out of our hands.

According to Epictetus, what we really control is our own mental faculty, and that is where we should focus our efforts. What happens around us is not that important. What we do with it is more important.

We can direct our attention to our own thoughts and emotions instead of constantly worrying about things that are beyond our control. This doesn't mean we should isolate ourselves from the world; the Stoics were actually highly social people. It means that when we practice stoicism, we develop a healthy indifference towards external events.

This allows us to face events without getting excessively stressed and without losing our minds or losing sleep. This is where the concept of "amor fati" comes in - the love of destiny. Accepting the inevitable with gratitude becomes a powerful way of dealing with circumstances we cannot change.

The bottom line message is clear: by focusing our energy on what we control internally, we can cultivate a more resilient and serene mindset in the face of life's uncertainties. Second part. Marco Aurelio.

As emperor of Rome, Marcus Aurelius was the most powerful man on the planet in his time. However, unlike many leaders before and after him, he was committed to living a life of virtue, following Stoic philosophy consistently. Despite the pressures of leadership over a vast empire, Marcus Aurelius shared valuable thoughts on how he dealt with daily stress in his work "Meditations.

" In addition to the well-known Stoic practice of negative visualization, he left less famous teachings that can offer practical advice for a more peaceful life. Let's focus on them, to learn our fourth principle: Do Less. To become calmer, we must simply do less.

It seems pointless, since the Stoics value productivity and diligence as a virtue, on the other hand moderation is also a Stoic virtue. So how can we be productive while doing less? Doing less does not mean remaining idle and unoccupied, with nothing to do, but rather focusing on what really matters, with conscious choices, seeking a balance between diligent action and avoiding excessive worries.

Marco Aurélio observed that people do many unnecessary things. These days we have access to unlimited entertainment, so it's very easy to get involved in all kinds of unproductive activities. “Doing less” goes beyond simply reducing meaningless activities; It also includes the concept of talking less.

Marco Aurélio observes that many conversations are empty, lead nowhere and consume valuable time and energy. Therefore, the essence of this principle is to do the essentials, eliminating not only meaningless activities, but also starting to work smarter and more effectively. A big advantage we gain from this, in addition to peace of mind, is that we can do less and better.

Marco Aurélio emphasizes the importance of constantly questioning the need for each action, this way we eliminate not only unnecessary tasks, but also the assumptions that are extremely necessary that are associated with them. A useful habit is to make a to-do list the night before, anticipating what needs to be done the next day. Not only does this give a sense of control, but it also lessens the mental burden by eliminating uncertainty.

Planning in advance is an effective way to keep your mind calm, as it reduces worries and allows you to focus on essential actions. So when Marcus Aurelius advises us to "do less," he is not suggesting sacrificing the virtue of diligence. Instead, it is encouraging us to make more conscious and efficient choices, focusing on the essentials to achieve a calmer and more meaningful life.

Short Exhausts. No place you can go is more peaceful—more free from interruption—than your own soul. Marcus Aurelius' words remind us of a truth repeated by the Stoics, where they believe it is unnecessary to travel or try to escape to calm down.

According to the Stoics, wherever we go, we take ourselves. And, once the euphoria of the newness has passed, we return our minds to a normal state. Proof of this is when we go traveling and, even in a stunning setting, there is always someone impatient, nervous or making trouble over the smallest things.

Marco Aurélio criticized those who tried to escape daily worries by going to calm places. He considered this practice idiotic, questioning why we should physically travel when we can find tranquility by seeking an internal refuge, within ourselves. This criticism reflects Marcus Aurelius's belief in the importance of finding peace and serenity through inner reflection, rather than seeking to escape to external locations.

Understand well, it's great to change scenery, but that alone won't make us calm or bring tranquility to the soul. But, yes, we learn to look inside. What Marco Aurélio proposes is very reminiscent of the practice of meditation, or even moments of reflection and contemplation to renew the mind and calm everyday life.

He offers us two reflections to consider as we step back briefly into our minds. First, he highlights that things do not cling to the soul. They remain outside, motionless.

Disturbance arises only from within, from our own judgment. Reflect on what disturbs you, what judgment do you have about this situation? Why does the other person's actions bother you?

Second, he reminds us that everything What we see is constantly changing and eventually ceases to exist. When thinking about the countless changes we have witnessed, he concludes that the world is essentially characterized by change, and our lives are shaped by our perception. These reflections lead us to the next principle which is: Remember that everything will pass.

Marco Aurélio tells us to keep in mind how quickly things pass us by. We are involved in something today, but next week or next month, we may be in something completely different. Stoic philosophy, summarized in the expression "Memento Mori" which means remembering death, makes us face the reality that life is short and fleeting.

Sometimes, we waste days feeding circular thoughts about problems, reliving worries, anxieties and suffering from it, every time. We act as if the things that irritate us will last forever, even if we lose our cool in the moment, anger is just a temporary emotional state. We have a special video on the channel about how to control this state of anger, which we will leave on the final screen.

Marco Aurélio wrote: “You could leave life now. Let it determine what you do, say and think. ” This was a personal reminder to continue living a life of virtue, which is valid to remind ourselves that all the things that we think take away our peace, will pass.

And if we compare it with the grandeur of life, we will realize how unimportant they are. And, to practice this self-control, I highlight some exercises and techniques below: Don't allow your emotions to make decisions for you. When we let our emotions decide for us or even control the situation, we are not acting rationally.

We lose our right to choose and become hostages to our instincts. And, with that, we can reap very serious consequences, so, in these moments, start practicing emotional regulation. Emotional regulation is the ability to understand how you feel, understanding your own emotional reactions and seeking to see situations as they really are, without letting it intensely affect or harm your life.

Basically, it means avoiding overloading emotions, especially negative ones, on events, people or circumstances. Doing so only makes it more difficult to solve problems and unbalances emotions. When something happens, regulate your emotions, see the situation as it is and not through anger, fear, anxiety or any other type of excessive emotion.

Emotional regulation is something that can be learned, when we manage our intense emotions and discover how to express them appropriately, we become able to focus on other tasks and begin to develop patterns of emotional regulation. Which makes our lives easier in every way. Distancing.

It is a useful way of dealing with stressful situations or people. You mentally imagine the situation or person, moving them away a few times, until they become very small and distant. This helps calm the brain.

This technique works because the brain has a natural tendency to react strongly to large, upcoming problems. By mentally diminishing the image, the brain calms down, reducing the intensity of the emotional response associated with the stressful situation. A variation of this is to imagine the stressful person speaking in a cartoon voice.

This not only reduces the feeling of threat, but also adds a touch of humor to the situation. This combination works to reduce emotional tension and gives you a lighter, less harmful view of the situation. Mental distancing is like a practical tool that you can use when you are stressed to react in a more balanced and calm way to problems.

Change your perspective. It's incredible how some people or certain issues can undermine our tranquility and leave us distressed, even when everything seems fine, isn't it? When you feel threatened or stressed about a situation, your brain reacts accordingly.

When you change perspective or reevaluate the situation as a positive challenge that You can't wait to face it, your brain reacts in a more constructive way. As Marcus Aurelius reminds us: “Choose not to be offended – and you will not be offended. ” The next time you come across a situation or person that would “theoretically” take your calm, change your judgment about the situation.

Even if what happened is something grotesque, see the situation from a new angle, recognizing that you cannot be bothered by it. Breathe deeply. Taking a deep breath and counting to ten changes both the physiology and chemical composition of the brain.

The extra oxygen helps and this simple exercise can give you the break you need for your Reactive Brain to step back while your Thinking Brain takes over. Between the stimulus and the response, the Stoics show us the third stage, the choice to think, that is, reasoning. But when we automatically respond to events in our lives, stopping, taking a deep breath and counting to ten can remind us that we still have the power to choose how we react to what happens to us.

Don't take everything personally. A concept widely used in cognitive therapy today is understanding that what belongs to you is yours, and what belongs to others is theirs. It may seem confusing, but it's simple in theory.

We often feel easily hurt by the way others act, which is a waste of time. People don't always intend to hurt us, but everyone has their own defense mechanisms. Unfortunately, these strategies can affect anyone nearby.

Therefore, it is essential to invest in self-knowledge and emotional intelligence. These skills help you not take other people's reactions personally and stay calm when things get difficult. Avoid negative people.

If you are part of a class with fifteen studious and dedicated students, it is very likely that you will become the sixteenth. The environment we live in shapes us, it can encourage us to grow, or it can pull us to decline. Whether you like it or not, other people's moods can be contagious.

If you spend the day with someone who is reactive and complaining, you will become reactive and complaining over time. Therefore, avoid reactivity as much as possible, people who cause problems or need constant drama. Save yourself from ruminating on issues that generate worry, frustration or any other type of emotional exhaustion.

It's easier to stay calm when problems happen to other people rather than to us. For example, when a friend is disrespected or unfairly loses their job, we always have a ready speech about how to be calm and try to react. However, Stoicism offers tools we can use to adopt the same stance.

Sometimes it can be difficult to think and act calmly, but our thoughts have a strong influence on our feelings and, consequently, on our actions. Let's end this video with a quote from Marcus Aurelius: “Keep this thought at hand when you feel a tantrum coming on — there is no value in getting angry. Instead, kindness and civility are more human and therefore more valuable.

A real human being does not give way to anger and discontent, and such a person is endowed with strength, courage and resistance — unlike anger and complaints. The closer a person comes to a serene mind, the closer he is to strength. ” Choose the courage to be calm.

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