The Power of NOT Reacting | 12 Habits to Control Your Emotions

Hey everyone, and welcome to TopThink. Today, we  will learn about the power of not reacting and twelve habits to control your emotions. Now, let’s begin.

Do you know someone who gets angry, anxious,  or upset over the smallest things? A surprising number of people have trouble restraining their  emotions, especially during periods of stress and uncertainty. When something doesn’t go their  way, they get overwhelmed by extreme feelings, like rage or distress, transforming  even the most minor conflicts into damaging and embarrassing situations.

For example, let’s say you’re debating with someone about a subject you both care  about, like sports or politics. All you want to do is make your point, but the other  person seems to be getting angrier and angrier. Perhaps they raise their voice or make  derogatory comments about you or your beliefs.

What starts as a friendly debate escalates into  swearing, name-calling, and personal criticisms. Why? Because not everyone knows know how  to control their emotions.

When they hear something they don’t like, many people react  impulsively, like a wave of frustration and volatility is crashing onto their heads. These  people may be prone to feelings of defensiveness as if any opposition is an insult to their  character. They might become angry that people aren’t validating their ideas or because they’re  struggling to communicate exactly what they mean.

Once these emotions start swirling in their  heads, they’re likely to make bad decisions. They may become desperate to get their way,  damaging their relationships and hurting the people they care about. Only after the dust  settles do they realize the damage they’ve done.

If you find yourself in a similar situation  — where your emotions are tested — how can you prevent your emotions from spiraling out of  control? In this video, we’re going to discuss twelve powerful habits anyone can use to master  what’s known as “non-reacting. ” The basic idea is simple.

By recognizing extreme emotions and  delaying impulsive reactions, you can make good decisions when it matters most. . .

and these habits  will help you do just that. Many of these tricks and techniques are employed by highly disciplined  people every single day. Like exercising physical muscles, it takes time and consistent effort to  build real emotional discipline, but with these everyday habits, you’ll learn to control  your emotions and navigate any situation with patience and composure.

1. Chemical Countdown When you experience an emotional conflict,  chemicals rush into your brain that motivate extreme reactions and impulsive behaviors.  If you want to control your emotions, you need to wait for that rush of chemicals  to disappear before taking action.

One simple trick is to close your eyes and  count to five. During those five seconds, the chemicals in your brain will slow down enough  to see your situation clearly. It sounds simple, but those five seconds can spare you  from years of impulsiveness and regret.

2. Find Your Roots When you feel strong emotions bubbling up inside you, try searching for the root  of the problem. In other words, ask yourself why you might be feeling the way you’re feeling. 

If you’re impulsively angry about something someone said, ask yourself why their comment  triggered such a strong emotional reaction. This habit immediately changes your perspective,  forcing you to step back and analyze your emotions from the outside. This instantly puts you in a  position of emotional control and reveals what’s really causing your distress.

Often the source of  a feeling isn’t what it appears. Once you find it, you can face the actual problem without  doing damage to yourself or others. 3.

Sources of Resentment Many of us have a bad habit of stewing  on feelings of anger or resentment. Let's say you have an argument with a friend. You  both walk away feeling hurt and irritated, but instead of expressing those feelings and finding  a solution, you allow your anger inside you to simmer and grow.

Over time, you may even lose  track of why you were angry in the first place. The longer you wait to resolve these feelings, the  harder it becomes to make those emotions go away. This is true of many negative emotions, like  sadness or embarrassment.

Ignoring these feelings can create lasting emotional turmoil, so speak up  and resolve your feelings before it’s too late. 4. Name Your Emotions We often struggle to control our emotions because  we don’t really know what we’re feeling.

All we recognize is a swirling cloud of thoughts  and feelings. Our emotions become muddled and frustrating, so we seek immediate relief  instead of understanding what’s going wrong. In situations like this, try naming your emotions. 

As soon as you feel something bubbling up inside you, ask yourself, “What exactly am I feeling?  Am I angry or sad? Impatient or embarrassed?

” Once you put a name to your emotions, they become  smaller, simpler, and easier to understand. 5. Manage Your Stress Stress has a significant effect on your emotional state.

When you’re  stressed, your patience and discipline wear thin. It feels like the world is crashing down all  around you, and minor things may trigger extreme emotional outbursts and irrational decisions. Any kind of stress can impact your emotional state, so make a habit of relieving some stress  every day.

There are plenty of stress-relieving activities out there, like writing, meditation,  and exercise. Any of these habits, if practiced regularly, may lower your stress levels, making it  much easier to process and control your emotions. 6.

Opportunities for Expression Many people lose control of their emotions because they don’t allow themselves to express  how they really feel. Men especially stuff their feelings down and pretend everything is fine until  the day their emotions suddenly explode outward. This is when extreme emotions do the most  damage to you and the people in your life.

For your own sake, don’t let your emotions  fester in the back of your mind. Instead, create opportunities to express your emotions  on a regular basis. Write in a journal, talk with a loved one, or sit down with a mental  health professional.

Make self-expression a normal part of your routine, and you’ll begin to  understand yourself a whole lot better. 7. Channel Your Feelings Talking or writing aren’t the only way to express  emotions.

You can also channel those feelings into activities like physical sports or creative  hobbies. These activities occupy your mind and channel your energy in a way that brings calm  and clarity. For example, if you’re caught up in a stressful situation, you might try singing at the  top of your lungs.

There are dozens of activities, like singing, that release your feelings and  change your state of mind. Find one that suits your interests. That way, you can channel  your emotions into something constructive.

8. The Empathy Routine When you’re angry at someone, try thinking about your situation from their point  of view. You may feel like you’ve been wronged, but it’s possible the other person feels the same  way.

They might be in a challenging position or, like you, struggling to understand why they  feel the way they feel. In either case, practicing empathy can neutralize extreme emotions  and help the two of you find common ground. Even if you’re not actively upset, this is a great  habit for expanding your emotional intelligence.

Practicing empathy challenges you to reflect  on your feelings, question your assumptions, and approach every situation with  a calm and collected state of mind. 9. Possess Your Emotions Are you ashamed of your emotions?

Too many people  avoid responsibility for their genuine feelings because they’re embarrassed or ashamed to feel  them. If someone asks you how you’re feeling, you might pretend everything is okay  and hide your emotions from the world. But this only deepens your emotional  turmoil.

When you’re feeling overwhelmed, take responsibility for your emotions because  there’s nothing shameful about how you feel. 10. The Boiling Point Even if you learn to control your emotions, you may be too upset to hold those emotions  inside you.

Some people call this the “boiling point” — the moment just before your feelings  bubble up and explode. If you want to control your emotions, get to know your boiling point so that  you never do or say something you regret. When you’re almost over the edge, remove yourself from  the situation and give yourself time to cool off.

11. Create Your Mantra Sometimes, when you’re feeling strong emotions, it helps to remind yourself what you’re working  toward or what kind of person you want to be. A simple mantra or a meaningful phrase can  help you find perspective and rise above negative emotions like anger or frustration. 

These feelings might be strong in the moment, but when you think about what really  matters, it’s easier to maintain control. It may take some time to find a mantra that’s  unique and special to you. There are all kinds of mantras out there, but often the powerful  mantras are the ones you create for yourself.

A few repetitions of this meaningful phrase can  relieve stress, provide clarity, and remind you what is really important. 12. The Power of Breath Many disciplined people have developed  incredible patience and willpower using the simple power of their breath.

You’ve  probably heard about breathing exercises to relieve stress or anxiety, but why does  breathing affect your emotional state? The first half of your breath, the inhale,  influences your sympathetic nervous system, which controls your fight or flight response.  Stopping for a deep breath of air dissuades impulsive behavior in favor of more logical  decisions.

The second half, the exhale, comes from your parasympathetic nervous system, which affects  your ability to relax and calm down. Simply exhaling a breath of air can pacify negative  feelings, giving you a sense of calm and control. Whenever your emotions are spiraling out of  control, take a deep breath in and out.

This simple exercise may be all you need to control  your emotions and change your state of mind. Thank you for watching TopThink  and be sure to subscribe because more incredible content is on the way.