"This Is A Woman's Sexual Fantasy" - Learn To Seduce Anyone & Avoid Getting Cheated On | Sadia Khan

so here's the thing I couldn't be attracted to a man who is not successful only because the qualities it takes to be unsuccessful in this day and age you have to be relatively lazy and you have to be because there's so many opportunities to education or to online marketing or something like that so I don't like the traits that keep a man unsuccessful I like the traits of a successful man but reality is the more a woman is physically attracted to you the more she makes access to her easy the more physically attracted she is

to you access becomes easy the less attractive to you the more barriers become available so that's why I think that when she's placing barriers there there's a lack of physical attraction so you are overcoming physical attraction to access her and then you run the risk of her being physically Unfaithful so that's why I don't recommend it yeah that's so interesting and I've heard you say that rich men get cheated on more than your that's so interesting okay we'll get to that in a second uh so here's two your point the reason that I think that

the reality is slightly more complicated certainly for guys maybe for women is that when like I I nobody expected me to do well my mother when I left for college quietly assumed I was going fail no definitely not so we were we were on the border between middle class and lower middle class you access to education uh Public public okay yeah yeah and you went on to college Stellar yes I did okaying took out loans and all that good stuff um but I didn't have discipline and so I think there's a you you have to

have ambition discipline and intellect unfortunately I wish that wasn't part of the equation but it is and if you have those three things then you've got a chance to be successful but nobody knows if you can develop Drive yeah and so I had ambition and thankfully I had intellect that maybe hadn't fully developed yet um but no one was sure if I would develop drive and I didn't develop drive until after I asked Lisa to marry me she said yes and then I started becoming very ashamed of myself because I was laying in bed four

to 5 hours a day while she went to work okay and my only job was to make her a sandwich at lunch and half the time I was like scrambling to have it made by the time she got there and I wasn't getting dressed or doing my hair and she was mortified so anyway finally one day I'm like oh my God I'm telling I promised her dad I would make her rich one I'm going to her one day and I'm ised in that direction and that shame that self-loathing was to get me moving then once

I developed the discipline then I was like okay now I can [ __ ] do anything I want it was absolutely incredible and so I became a person that was worthy of her respect and worthy of my own respect quite frankly and so that really made me a different person yeah and an attractive person yeah and so it it is a very complicated thing because so we got married young and this is something that I'm sad is very uncommon now but I don't know who I would be if I hadn't met her and here this

is another reason why I think more traditional roles are very useful so when leis and I got together she was very traditional she grew up in a traditional household her family was Greek um her dad told her yeah you can go study film Mak or whatever you want cuz you're you're and he didn't mean this in a derogatory way the greatest thing a woman can do with her life is become a wife and mother yeah and so to honor the Gods like I I really want that's how he thought of it he did not think

oh you're less than to become the thing that is worth a man dying for you will go become a wife and mother it's the most beautiful thing you could do it's the greatest contribution to world to your family like people that denigrate my wife doesn't have kids I don't have kids but to denigrate motherhood is [ __ ] insane yeah so anyway with love joy and reverence in his heart he was thinking you will become a a mother so enjoy your time yeah so like yeah study whatever you want and that really imprinted in my

wife even though she had Big Dreams it imprinted in my wife that being a mother and being a wife is very honorable right and so when we got married she thought okay you go be successful first and then when we're successful enough I'll Chase my dream as well and in that though she had to work through me she didn't have a direct interface to the world with ambition and drive but she had a husband and she could incentivize her husband in her very powerful feminine ways and the greatest explanation of this I've ever heard was

in My Big Fat Greek Wedding when the woman said your H or your father may be the head but I'm the neck and I point him at whatever I want to point him yeah that was my marriage yeah and so my wife pointed me at becoming the man that I've become and rewarded the thing she liked and I know this probably the dumb word to use but punish the things that she didn't and to earn her respect and to get that look that look that a woman gives when she thinks you're incredible yeah to earn

that look which is the greatest thing in the world yeah I became who I became yeah and it's super attractive to a woman because here's the thing we are attracted to men that fulfill their potential we're always attracted to a man that fulfills his potential when we see a man filled with potential and he's not using it we naturally become less attractive and it's one of the reasons why I find you know the younger generation where they make a lot of money on cryp crypto and they make a lot of money quick um it's super

unattractive to women it only attracts very vacuous women because the reality is the skills that you need and all the failures and the rejection and the setback um essentially you need them to build character when you get rich fast you still you find these men bored in the gym at like 4 p.m. on a on a Wednesday uh because they don't really have a structured life or anything like that and they feel unfulfilled as well that I'm I'm I would love to see long-term study on men that made money quickly on crypto and in their

future in terms of their mental health I don't know how conducive it is to them because for men they need to be some even for women there needs to be some discomfort in order to stimulate um your potential and these kind of quick fixes don't do it so I do recognize that women are attracted to money but good women are not attracted to money they're attracted to the process over a disciplined uh self-controlled man but vacuous women are attracted to the outcome not the process and they just want to see you they don't care if

you're a drug dealer they don't care if you're a crypto guide they just want to see the lifestyle so you have to be careful how you make your money very interesting okay so why do wealthy men get cheated on more um their selection in Partners tend to be awful now unfortunately you got very lucky you picked a partner before you made money but unfortunately I assure you I did not get lucky oh you didn't no no no yeah with my eyes wide opening that's the way to do it what happens with Rich men is they

tend to here here the reality is being super super successful um it tends to require some level of social autism and what I mean by that is it requires a man who's happy to sacrifice social connections to just work just get work done so he tends to be a man with a small circle small like interaction limited social skills let's just get on with work now that kind of guy unfortunately what happens is he goes through most of life not really meeting many women not really being around them and then making money you just access

loads of really attractive women that you didn't think you could ever access before so what happens is they lose their eyesight when when it comes to her character and they focus entirely on her appearance so they end up attracting women who just like his lifestyle who don't care if there's a lot of emotional connection won't mind that you're working 25 hours a day eight days a week um because she's got access to your credit card and that type of woman is completely different to the woman that begs you for a few days off so she

can spend more time with you so what happens is men that have simple jobs simple careers attract women who like quality time men that have very busy careers that take over their world they attract women who just like the perks of being with you and those women are so emotionally disconnected to you that cheating doesn't feel like anything to those women whereas a women that build with you and are emotionally connected to you crave quality time they don't want that CEO lifestyle so they filter themselves out so you end up with a pool of women

that are more likely to cheat it's really interesting this is why people really have got to ask themselves the question what is going to need to be true for this relationship to be worth the sacrifices yeah and if your answer is sex you're in real trouble and you have to ask yourself if your motivation if your motivation for becoming rich is getting more women you have to think about the quality of women if you couldn't access her without money then chances are any man with money can access her and if you yeah so if if

you can access her without money she's your level but if it takes money to access her you are replaceable by the next man who's an ATM so don't do it unfortunately we have to be realistic with our expectations if you're a four out of 10 guy that happens to be a millionaire but the reality is a 10 out of 10 girl is still not going to be physically attracted you she's still going to just be attracted to your lifestyle so she's more likely to still get her physical needs met elsewhere and the amount of women

I see cheating on their Rich husbands is unbelievable the weird thing about this for me and it may just be that you're right and there's a self- selection bias for the female version of sociopathy quite frankly because typically men cheat because they want a novel SE and women cheat because they want em experience that they're Notting from theire um but this is a totally different thing it sounds like but I Al yeah because usually the emotional connection is limited when a man is so busy um but I would I say rich men have it the

same way beautiful women are more likely to be cheated on and people are always confused by that because they'll say to a beautiful girl that gets cheated on they're you're so beautiful how did he cheat on you and I always say you're the most likely to get cheated on if you're a beautiful woman and the reason being is in order to you got to remember men are terrified of women and terrified of rejection it's not a nice feeling that man that is able to go to that 10 out of 10 in the club or the

10 of 10 of the street and try and approach her and try and be with her is a man who wants women and wants beautiful women so much that he's he's able to forgo his risk of rejection he really likes Beauty so that man is always going to be attracted to beautiful women beautiful women are a big value to him he likes that that's a important outcome for him in his life so when you're with a woman who's super beautiful chances are you've been with other beautiful women or beauty means a lot to you you're

willing to risk rejection for it so unfortunately what happens to women is that shy quiet good reserved man if she's really beautiful he won't approach her he doesn't act he doesn't care to go through the potential rejection to get to her but the guy that has plenty of women who really value sex really wants sexual intimacy really likes beauty is the only pool of men that come to her and that man is more likely to be unfaithful sexually so beautiful women and rich men they're the most likely to be treated on that's really fascinating I

don't think that's what people expect so yeah it's not I mean it's not necessarily the case all the time but the reality is if I see a man and he's chosen a a very very like simple not so pretty girl that doesn't look after herself that man has a libido that's different to a man that has a Playboy Bunny wife he's libido is different he's a type of guy that's okay with average and isn't super super distracted by Beauty and just is sex doesn't isn't the for for pay of Forefront of his mind whereas a

guy that's got the Swedish superm model sex means something to him beautiful girls mean something to him accessing beauty is important he's more likely to stray so the the whole red pill movement with um guys today feeling like they're pulling back the curtain on how the world really works and they're understanding these games with women um what do you tell them uh it's nonsense and put it all away and it's literally a disease that you've inserted into your brain genuinely yeah and how do you put it away I I've heard you say delete your dating

apps delete your because here's the thing with red pill you've got to understand that men that are successful with women don't actually watch red pill content this doesn't really appe to them men that have good success with women who select women wise L who have good healthy relationships they don't actually watch the red Bill content that much it's the men that suffer with women are the ones either they've been hurt or they suffer in general they're bad at selection they're the ones that listen to it so what happens is it the red pill content exaggerates

their existing fears they usually have an underlying fear or bad or poor selection and the red pill content will tell them exactly what to fear how to fear and their strategies to avoid it but it's not actually teaching them the skills and tools that they need to create a good healthy relationship it's just how to protect yourself against the evil that is women and so it's really dangerous to them it actually doesn't help them overcome their um their shortcomings it just exaggerates them and validates them and then makes them more fearful of women and more

weak more weak what the red field content creates weak men say more because what it does is it teaches them how to select terrible women it teaches them have lots of money and you get lots of girls have a young girl that's half your age that's what you want these women are just there for lifestyle of course they're going to cheat on you it treat them mean keep them clean basically attract a broken woman to have a woman with no standards who loves lifestyle is a bimbo doesn't intellectually challenge you that's the woman you should

be with what is this nonsense how are you going to create a marriage out of that that's what they teach them so what if you could be the Empress of the red pill for a year what would we be what are some of the lectures that we would give to try to get them back on track like they've got a base assumption that the woman is the enemy yeah uh that money is going to solve your problems if you've ever come across a woman that's your enemy it's because you've had low self-esteem and poor boundaries

it's never the woman yeah never ever there are thieves everywhere but my house has never been broken into because there's a lock on the door there's drug dealers everywhere I've never taken one because I'm not interested in that now if you are constantly getting played by women you are constantly getting used by them they're cheating on you it's because you saw red flags and ignored them and went forward because your low self-esteem was driving your selection process rather than your actual boundaries so it's entirely and utterly your fault there are terrible women everywhere in the

world but if you are a man who's secure enough and willing to walk away when you see red flags or when you see your boundaries being crossed enough times you will never experience the wrath of a terrible woman you might come across them here and there you might get burnt and there but you'll never really fall pray to it but I see men whose wives have you know stolen access to to the children don't allow them any access taken all their money cheated on them but I always say to them even when it gets to

that point she didn't become this woman yesterday she had all of the red flags from day one and they'll say yeah it's true she used to deprive her other ex of um seeing the children or yeah she did used to date a billionaire and took half of his money all of the red flags were pre-existing they don't come overnight you choose to ignore them oh she was talking to her ex when we first got together or she had a boyfriend when we first met but I managed to steal her she showed you who she was

you chose to ignore it you can't accept that you chose badly and you as a man failed yourself and now you want to believe that they're the enemy and really the enemy is your own low self-esteem so how do they raise it um problem solving this is what a man needs to do if you want to raise your self-esteem it's very simple you take all the problems you have in your life whether it's Financial whether it's with women whether it's with connection and in instead of seeking highs like if I'm missing out on women I

could easily hire an escort and get the feeling of a woman or I can work on the skills I need to access good women I problem solve avoid while avoiding highs if I'm overweight I could easily just you know take a few pills and lose a few weight or get some surgery or I can learn the skills on how to have a healthy diet and that why I use food as a coping mechanism and get rid of that I have to take all the problems find a solution to them problem solve and I'll start to

respect myself far more and once I start to realize I have the ability to solve problems I start to trust my own judgment a lot more and know that if something goes wrong it's okay I'll fix it so if if she walks away and if she doesn't like my boundaries no worries I'll find another one I'll be able to do it but it's a lack of ability to problem solve makes men feel overwhelmed and then they seek highs rather than solving problems why delete dating apps um I you know I said that but in the

reality I do understand it's very hard to be single it's really hard to be single I know it's super super hard to be single and find people and meet people in an organic way but unfortunately what dating apps does is it polarizes you where either you have an abundance and illusion of options and you think everybody's replaceable and you just have very kind of uh minimal investment relationships and you replace people or you just get non-stop rejection and you start to really suffer in the form of low self-esteem and think [ __ ] the dat

I'm just going to go pay for an escort either way it distorts your self-image in some way shape or form you either start thinking you're King of the castle because you can get so many girls or but really most of the girls on there are also a bit you know lonely and desperate and maybe on the rebound or you start thinking you're the ugliest man on the planet and you need to rely on um you know escorts or something like that either way it damages the self-esteem there are lots of success stories and I don't

completely forbid it but I do think there's dangers in dating apps so how do people today meet wish I knew I wish I knew this is one you meet your significant other I met through work yeah work related and stuff so mine was all investment related so I I had that luxury but I really wish I knew because a lot of people come to me with this question what is a good way to meet people in La I don't know what it would be like in LA is it bars and clubs or I mean I

wouldn't rule those out but um that isn't where I would start people so I would figure out because what you were saying at the beginning is so right you want want to match somebody's values the reason that arranged marriages as much as I'm opposed to it um has some logic is the somebody who's been in a marriage raised kids cares deeply about their kids they're going to be like okay what are the real things that allow somebody to be long-term successful in a marriage and it's going to be values it's going to be okay they

share enough values that they're going to be able to get along they're probably looking for people that are good at problem solving novel problem solving is is arguably the greatest skill anybody a job and you know all of these they will have pass certain hurles and all that it sounds like really boring stuff but this this is why I like your advice it it is grounded in reality it's actually practical okay so um if we know that's really what people need to be doing in order to find somebody I would say what are your values

what are the things you like and then go put yourself in those physical circumstances where you're going to be around those people like a gym or like a could be a gym if that's your stick but women I would say very weird about being approached to the gym there's and and look I'm I don't go to gy if you're attractive enough all the rules go down the drain unfortunately yeah unfortunately so here then what I will say is if you're a guy that's going to uh be impressive in the gym go there cuz you want

to be somewhere you're going to be impressive in fact I've never said that out loud but that's true here here is this is exactly how I got my wife I was her teacher right now it was a school for adults yeah very clear uh and I'm only 3 years old I was a teacher before as well yeah it's proba God in fact one of the things I want to talk to you about make a note on that it's a it's a good transition isn't it going from teaching to podcasting and stuff like that what interesting

for me there was uh like 15 years maybe almost 20 skill is useful there is something in my freezer that I absolutely cannot live without in fact I've got an entire freezer dedicated to this product it is a true story all right can you guys guess what it is and no it is not ice cream it's butcher box for years now I've been eating butcher boox meat almost every single day why because it's that good and I love that it shows up at my door like clockwork for me though it's not just about the convenience

it's about fueling my body with the highest quality protein out there new members who sign up will get their choice of organic chicken breast grass-fed ground beef or wild cot salmon in every box for an entire year plus you'll get $20 off your first box just go to butcherbox.com impact and use code impact to check out you'll get your choice of a free protein in every box for a year plus that $20 off your first order click the link in the show notes and head to butcherbox.com impact and use code impact yeah I get I

get why you say that I've never thought about that before but I get why you say that um when yeah you were saying you met your wife yeah so she saw me in a shared interest so she came to learn film I was teaching film so we both shared a deep passion and then she saw me at my best she saw me doing something where she was like oh yeah and then look here's something people hate but uh power dynamics is is a whole thing and look I get it my wife and I are a

me too story on on a different timeline uh the good news is she's the only student I ever hit on literally once only like three or four years apart yeah three and a half years apart not real so um that you want to find a circumstance like that where it's a thing like I really enjoy this thing and it gives me a chance to shine because you need a way for them to see what you're good at and what if you're not an impressive person you have to become impressive or you have to date down

yes we have to date down thems are your options yeah yeah so my whole thing is and I know that the black pill Community really hates the idea of of maxing what's maxing where you go okay I'm going to Max my looks I'm G to Max my body I'm G to Max my whatever uh but that is the only thing that [ __ ] makes sense what do they think you should do they just want you and look my dearest blackpill people I get it yeah because you can't imagine how much it wounds my soul

that I will never be as smart as Elon Musk yeah that that really bothers me really oh yes that causes me no small amount of pain and the fact that you're smarter than like probably 5 billion people literally doesn't help really it doesn't help not even a little bit the only thing that comes to my rescue is understanding the only thing that's torture is constantly lamenting that I'm not going to be as smart as him okay so that's a waste of time if there's something I can do about it go do something about it and

if there's not something I can do about it stop [ __ ] worrying about it it the whole game is how you feel about yourself and you're by yourself that's it so if you focus on the look if I were horribly burned and my IQ were lower my life would be worse there's there's no way around that there two ways unfortunately and so I I get it but if that were my lot investing in how shitty it is is [ __ ] stupid makes no so as somebody my heart the the the way I'm expressing

myself right now is because I love people and I want to see people be happy and I want to see them flourish and so I'm telling you it's [ __ ] stupid because it won't help you be happy it won't help you find fulfillment so you've got to take on the Joo willink attitude of I'm horribly burned good now what am I going to do with my life because I can't undo it so either go become a scientist that [ __ ] figures out how to deal with horrible Burns or go be an author and

uh or develop Ready Player one and create a world where your own physicality matters far whatever but sitting at home lamenting it is the only thing that doesn't make sense it's the so in my life I have a rule I only do and believe that which moves me towards my goals since my number one goal is to feel good about myself when I'm by myself I can't sit here and spend Cycles worrying about the fact that I'm not smarter than I am it is what it is so I'm going to maximize the intelligence that I

have going to figure out okay if we can all get 100 times better literally everybody the guy with a 98 IQ can still get 100 times better because that's what the human brain does is it grows and adapts but you have to apply yourself so what would you say to men that are like not taking care of their weight or just not investing in themselves do they just have to should they just accept that they have to date down because what I find with my clients that have not taken care of their appearance that have

not kind of reached their potential what they end up doing is maybe marrying somebody that's in Thailand or living in the Philippines who needs a Visa who needs somebody to kind of save her and her family and that's where they feel impressive so instead of maxing like out their potential they just go find somebody more dire that they can look impressive in front of do you think that's the strategy they can use if it works but it feels like a very fragile strategy it usually doesn't work but that's what they think would work do you

think in the mean time that gives them a full sense of self-esteem if it gives them uh I I don't know that it gives them a false sense of self-esteem you're actually able to help somebody and that is amazing the problem is once you've helped them then they're going to be like rad thanks bye but yeah here's the problem they think it will be in exchange for emotional intimacy and you can't actually buy emotional intimacy you can do everything else but you cannot buy emotional intimacy from a woman so though it makes them feel like

a superh hero they're expecting her to be genuinely in love with him and genuinely appreciate him when really he her he's a he's a like kind of Obamacare pant so unfortunately it doesn't work that way and they suffer in the form of lower self-esteem on the other end but it's something in the moment they can't help because it helps and that's why I see a lot of these passport throws have you heard of that concept it's men uh who give up on women in America so they take their passport and they'll go find a 90-day

fiance elsewhere yeah so that phenomenon I think breaks into different categories so what you're describing I hadn't heard about I didn't know that's a thing I would definitely uh while I think when you help somebody that is real if you're expecting that to lead to sex and a real relationship it's not going to um yes I think you need to date within your sexual Market values you need to be honest with yourself one thing I've always prided myself on I don't lie to myself and so um that that has rewarded me richly largely like as

I got rich I did not even think about trying to find another woman I was like dude sharing a life with somebody is the bomb and if somebody is with me for my money and they're super hot they're going to be like I mean you've been talking about this they're they're going to be with me not because they're attracted to me but what drives you if you don't you know you're in a monogamous relationship you're praise be to God I mean I don't know if your viewers have ever seen your home but it's unbelievable um

and so what drives you I was asking Lisa this as well what drives you you guys are literally doing so incredible but you haven't slow down when what what is it that keeps you meaning and purpose is the only thing that matters amazing meaning and purpose it gives you a legacy or something think about Legacy CU I'm not having kids and once I die that's it I I will be completely unaware of anything I cannot as I think as Marcus realia said you can't enjoy your posture Mis Fame so even if I'm able to do

something that lasts me on me I won't [ __ ] know I'm dead yeah you've accepted mortality you don't need to live beyond it% so I just know that life is about a neurochemical state and you're doing everything you can to be fulfilled and so I learned very early on that the only way to be fulfilled is to work your ass off to gain a set of skills that allows you to serve not only yourself but other people in a way that you find exciting right and so that that's it we we started impact theory

for that reason but uh I could see myself at some point saying H this is too much I don't want to work this much anymore um and so I've already worked out like what those PL change your mind on kids or you think no um at this point I don't so first let me Define how I feel about kids and by the way for listeners listening closely there's an open loop cuz I said that there were two things uh that that could be the passport bro thing so I will try to remember to come back

to that would I ever change my mind on kids the thing that I actually think about kids I really want kids like I really want kids I could write you poems that would make you convinced that I've had kids wow now the reason I can do that is cuz I Big Brother for a kid for8 and a half years and so I know what it's like to have somebody love you and you love them back and uh there was a moment where he begged me to basically be his father and to take him on now

unfortunately I did not know he was being abused and so I was like man I'm So Young bro I'm like I'm not ready to be a dad anyway so I I know that experience maybe more intimately than people give me credit for um and but it's also part of why I don't want kids so the only thing I want more than to have kids is to not have kids right and one of the things I want to talk to you about is I have a real fear the only thing this is going to be controversial

the only thing that makes a relationship worth it to me because it is a sacrifice and constant compromise and constantly dealing with the way that women look at the world which sometimes drives me [ __ ] crazy and I know that the way that men view the world Drive Lisa crazy I totally get it um but it it it is just a big ball of compromise yeah the only thing that makes it worth it is to be somebody's number one and when a woman has kids your number whatever how many kids she has so if

she got three kids you're number four and do you think that might have to do with your childhood and your dad feeling miserable after a while it must but I don't have process it in that direction not how it felt growing up like when my dad left I was super surprised I did admittedly over time realize oh that's why I was having those dreams about a Loveless marriage but from the kids perspective did your mom prior did your mom prioritize you guys no so my mom was an awesome mom I can't stress that enough she's

here right now yeah I have a great relationship with both my parents my mom was amazing exactly what I needed exactly the reason I think I'm so capable of dealing with relationships she's why I didn't do drugs or alcohol ah like I I have no complaints about how I was raised um but it when I think about the way that what my mom said to me it always made a lot of sense which is you kids I'm raising you to leave us one day and you should leave us one day but that means I have

to prioritize your dad okay so and I was always like word right like that made a lot of sense to me okay so the only thing I'm curious about is what is it that makes you um want to prioritize your marriage so much so that you would outrun your love for becoming a father because that's hypothetical right and my wife is real and I did the reality of having kids you don't have kids yet no okay so uh I'll say this more for your soon Tobe husband maybe one day husband uh that one day his

child is going to recount to him a 30second Tik Tok video and it's going to take him 9 minutes to tell him about the 30C video and he's going to beg your child to stop explaining it to him and he's going to keep going because he doesn't have a prefrontal cortex and he can't help himself and maybe your husband finds that cute and endearing I wanted to chew through plate glass it might be because it wasn't your biological child it's possible yeah but it's also possible that that [ __ ] is just obnoxious and reason

that dads especially will continue to lean into work the way I would want to contribute to the family um is I would want to work and build and provide I don't find myself I'm not a good caretaker I don't enjoy caretaking at all yeah well the only reason I say it's very rare that I come across couples that I feel as such a healthy example to children and um and I mentioned this to Lisa as well and it's um even just from watching you guys online um I just thought what if they if you two

had children that would be one of the luckiest children in the world that's very kind of you super honored I genuinely believe you would be fantastic and I I think I would I think we'd smash it yeah I've never seen people so respectful of each other so respectful of their guests um create such a beautiful world and you know I would be your child just like anyone would be and I just remember watching an interview of you guys I think you were talking about resolving conflicts and I just thought in a world where the worst

people on the planet are recreating wouldn't it be such a beautiful world if people like this had children all the time and so I I actually now you're on to where I'm conflicted yeah because I worry that we're headed for and this is going to sound crazy to um people that are passionate about the environment but I worry that we're headed to population collapse and that our problem is not going to be overpopulation it is going to be dramatically underpopulated uh you just to look at the math the math is there we we are going

to be underpopulated for sure uh and so that really scares me and so now when I meet parents I thank them for their service yeah yeah because I am very grateful yeah know I I genuinely and and this is not to be like you know tell anybody what to do but it's just very when you see a beautiful marriage um the psychologist in you is just like oh my God imagine if that how lucky the child would be oh my God and so that's my natur and plus with my you know ethnic background I naturally

kind of we think kids is everything um but no it's a very conscious decision on your end isn't it there is no nothing bearing so I was always just curious but you've explained it really well I completely understand and in my experience of working with couples that don't have kids they tend to have a very magical marriage uh that they because the only thing that will forego the desire to have children is if you have a connection that's worth it so that's usually what I tend to find yeah and I have to say like my

wife is awesome a and I'm obsessed so that doesn't help from that perspective yeah completely understand but here's the thing I I want people to hear me what we're doing is a very dangerous strategy and I actually don't advise it right and there are days where the thought of being a father really pulls at me yeah and there are more days where I'm glad I don't have them but we knew that going into why do you think it's a dangerous strategy because I think we are products of evolution and evolution wants one thing and one

thing only from you and that is that you have kids that survive long enough to have kids and so fulfillment if I'm right that that really is the name of the game the most readymade path to fulfillment is kids yeah they are they're amazing and you know I understand and usually I don't recommend them especially when the relationship is chaotic and stuff uh because with the wrong person they can be a life sentence and I've seen people's lives and I've I've spoken to so many women who say no matter how much I love my child

I love him to bits but when you have it with the wrong person I promise you you regret every single day because it's your life you feel like you're trapped so said it's said risk either way I guess it's a risk either way but we are living in a world where there definitely will be more and more people that choose not to have children as we as we get older scary it is scary and it's usually the sensible people that choose not to have children that's the scary part it's always a successful intelligent Su like

sensible people who opt out of it and it's more The Reckless people who opt in so this is this kind of the really bad news is the more you educate women the fewer kids are born oh yeah that's true that's very true those are just facts I wonder what the correlation is with that that's very easy what do you think that is from an evolutionary perspective you had no other option basically there was no birth control so if you wanted the protection of a man like even just forget romance for a second if you wanted

to be protected in times where that was a real [ __ ] thing which is the vast majority of our evolutionary history uh you were going to have sex yeah and if you had sex the odds of you getting pregnant were virtually 100% yeah so it wasn't an option but women have Incredible Minds and so when they're educated they respond the same way a guy does this is [ __ ] incredible I love this there's so many options so many things that fascinate me so many things I want to try I want to see if

I'm good at this yeah and so when you do that and Society gets safer now instead of having six kids they have one right and so even if they still become a mother they don't become a mother of six or 12 they become a mother of one right and so now if if a couple only has one child the population will be cut in half crazy yeah so it's not like nobody's having kids it's that you to Hold Steady I think the number is like 2.3 every couple of us have 2.3 kids because of mortality

yeah so it's like you can't [ __ ] around yeah and yet so we're literally we're literally decreasing the population rapidly so we'll go up to something like 9.7 you think homosexuality has a has a role to play I don't think so no look I worry hey let's open a crazy can of worms um I have a feeling this is just a hunch it's a hypothesis I do not have the data on this I could be totally wrong and no worries if I am um but something is going on that's disrupting our endocrine system I

have a feeling that it's microplastics and other environmental toxins and that's really causing some strange effects the effeminization of men the masculinization of women um and it's so visceral in America it's like you know a mov it's just an LA thing maybe but but when um when I ever I'm in America the men are almost androgynous and it's so different to anywhere else in the world so I don't know if I I'm not really much of a conspiracy theorist but it just doesn't seem typical and I don't know if it's just in big cities or

whatever it is but there does seem to be a shift and I don't know if that's socially conditioned I don't know if it's because we're exposing people to more choices and you know exposing to more sexual pleasure but it does seem different there it okay again now I'm talking about an idea that I have not researched so I will merely explain how I approach the problem uh looking at it it's almost certainly going to be multifactorial it's going to be a lot of things but I've had enough Health guests on the show to know our

endocrine systems are being disrupted nobody debates that something is going on so can you biologically change people's sexual orientation oo that I'm not speaking to all all I'm saying is that there is something that the and Vibe is some percentage could be 1% could be 99% I have no idea some percentage of the equation is going to be when you disrupt the endocrine system you're going to get unexpected results in terms of sexuality sexual preference etc etc um it's way too early for anybody especially myself yeah to say definitively what that is cultural will also

certainly be a component it is utterly fascinating how much flexibility there is is especially in uh female sexuality from what little literature I have looked at females do seem to have an easier time um being bisexual than men and so there's some pretty there's a do do you think that might be linked to the fact that we believe that men are more forgiving of bisexuality or more encouraging women you mean yeah or more encouraging like I know that as a woman if you tell a man you're bisexual it's almost encouraged but if you tell a

woman that you are bisexual man it's automatically discouraged or at least she loses attraction so do you think the flexibility comes from the Forgiveness of men or the encouragement of men okay can I just completely derail and I'm asking the audience as much as you so please everybody understand that I've asked evolutionary biologists this question and nobody knows so I am speculating I'm speculating having read a lot of books on the topic uh okay so here it goes the question I want everyone to ask themselves ask yourself this why on God's green earth is the

clitorus on the outside okay that doesn't make any [ __ ] sense right for you if if I'm right and all Evolution cares about is that you have a child that lives long enough to have a child then women should want nice deep penetration right because the reason why a man thrusts deeply at orgasm is so that the ejaculate is as close to the cervix as humanly possible so the sperm has to travel the least amount of distance but you put the pleasure button for a woman on the outside what the [ __ ] like

that is the weirdest thing I can possibly think of okay so then you have to why would this be okay look at the animal kingdom again I know I'm speculating I know I'm way out over my skis here but this is so interesting to me okay if you look at bonobos who are one of our closest relatives they will use female-to-female genital contact as a way of mending relationships right of bonding women to women now if women are literally biologically gifted in all the ways you would need to be gifted in order to care for

an infant from being able to feed them from their body that's [ __ ] crazy uh 15% of women have a fourth photo receptor which means they actually see colors men can't see one hypothesis is that allows them to see changes in the skin tone of their child to see if they're sick distressed whatever uh their ability to Pi up on emotions nonverbal cues they just outscore men left right and Center so if the clitorus is on the outside is a way to allow women to bond to men broken fences in order to have additional

care for the young so that they'll team up and they'll look after the infants together you can understand then why the infant would be more likely to survive longer now I've asked that question directly to evolutionary biologists and they're like maybe but there's absolutely no data to back that up right but that to me just makes all the sense in the world so now you get to one from a guy's perspective if I can convince two women to be together and allow me into the mix now I have access to two females right obviously much

better from uh evolutionary perspective if I can hoard resources and so now it actually makes sense for women to come to me and nature does not give a [ __ ] if one guy populates a th000 babies 10,000 babies look at gas KH or but wouldn't the women compete for the resources compared to a monogamous man uh women will a guy will only be able to monopolize as many women as they can give resources to is that what you're asking yeah I'm just wondering if if evolutionary encouraged two women to be with one man wouldn't

they and maybe almost be bisexual and just kind of make it easier would there still not be a source of enity regarding the resources well so yeah yes undoubtedly and that's why if the cliturus is on the outside then women potentially I'm making this up I have no idea correct and so now women have a way to leverage oxytocin and vasopress that happens when you orgasm they have access to that without needing a penis okay now again I I I am this is just a hypothesis but man I've really tried to invalidate this and it

just there's so many things that are like huh it could be could it be that sometimes um the reason for the clitorus to be on the outside is because during menstrual cycles um they can't really get pregnant through penetration anyway so there might as well be a way to Outsource pleasure without you know re needing it's certainly possible I and I have no data to say have any making this up I'm just curious personal experience women tend to be turned off when they're on their period that they don't want people them they rather let's wait

so my gut instinct is they not like encouraging sexual contact of any kind at that point again guess not stab in for yeah yeah it's good to kind of stimulate I've never thought about that before though I think about that endless how do men put themselves in a situation where they can avoid the kind of woman that's going to cheat on them here's thing with men they this is a really key difference why I always say men get cheated on so much more than women do they with women we enter relationships with the Assumption the

man is going to cheat at some stage and then we're looking for evidence that he's not going to do it so we go in with our you know with our like alertness on most women and I I think there's an evolutionary reason for that because obviously we don't want to be left pregnant and all these things so most women when they meet a man they'll start to check his online when he's online who he's following this and then over time they earn the trust and like okay I can relax he's actually quite good like I

haven't seen any problems perfect with men they go into relationships with the Assumption she would never they go in with this naivity when they're dating that why no no girl would and the other thing men do is because they've selected a Woman They want to justify their selection so they assume she's a great girl they assume she's a good girl simply because they've selected her not because she's eared any of those values so what happens is they ignore a lot of the behaviors that predict cheating and the behaviors that predict cheating are so easy to

see but they avoid those and they just focus on what they like because particularly if they're sexually satisfied they will literally avoid all the evidence so how they get cheated on is they go into it with a naivity now men who have been with lots of women will tell you that women are no more innocent than men are they've been on the receiving end when they've been in bed with a girl and she's called a boyfriend and said oh I'm just going to be home they've seen that side of women some men have never seen

that side of women so they just think that doesn't exist so what happens is they go in with a little bit of naivity and they literally take words over behaviors as soon as a woman says oh no I don't do this I'm I'm a traditional woman they won't look at an they will say well she's a traditional woman but she's been on a private jet recently or she's gone on holiday with and she didn't tell me who she was going with or you know she's always in the club and she doesn't tag me or any

they don't connect the dots they simply go by what she says rather than what she does and I noticed this particularly with men who have terrible relationships with their fathers and just grow up in a single parent home I always say men who grow up in a single parent home are far more likely to be cheated on and the reason I believe that is when you grow up with just one parent you have only one version of events you only have a female perspective of the world you kind of just think okay what mom says

is almost true because you don't have a way of factchecking it when you grow up with your mom and dad you see that mom also you know she can be a bit annoying dad is difficult sometimes you see the dynamic and you can fact check the truth and you validate what there being said when men grow up with just a female perspective they start to go into the real world believing everything a woman says and not double-checking it so when she when she says oh my ex is so controlling he used to always think I

was cheating on him he won't say why did he think you were cheating on did you do anything they'll just think oh my God what what how he's so toxic I'm going to prove I'm so much better than him and I'm not going to say anything I'm going to let you do whatever you want they just adapt to her perspective so that's the first thing and the second thing is because they grew up not seeing what a wife looks like not seeing that women you know they tend to come home when they're happy they don't

always go on holidays with their friends they don't come home super late they don't stay over really like you know when they're married they kind of stay home with their they want to come home to their husband they didn't get to see that Growing Up So when their woman is hyper independent they don't see it as a signal that she's not attached they just see as this is how women come and therefore they select women who are usually more likely to cheat on them because she has those traits of a single woman that they don't

not it they don't notice does that make any sense it does uh I assume the things you went through are the behaviors that predict so they're going out clubbing they're not taking you um what are what are the things that if somebody's being naive that they're being naive about so certainly that women are capable of it but um oh God I hate to even say this but like what are the red flaks what well here's the main naive thing they simply think that if they treat her better than what she normally goes for they've got

no competition so what I mean by that is they walk into a room and they be like I'm the richest guy here I've got no competition or I'm the tallest guy she's been with I've got no competition your competition is not defined by other men your competition is by how loose her boundaries are and her values you could be the best looking man she knows you could be the richest man she knows but if she is somebody who really values Independence and really really values her own kind of Liber Liberation she will not care if

you're she's cheating with someone less than you more than you whatever it is it's her open her desire to be independent and not be caged now what they all do is they have this false sense of security that they've created for themselves rather than based on her behavior your sense of security should come from her level of dedication how do you monitor her dedication she naturally respects the relationship more than her independence so what I mean by that is yes she might want to go to mikos every summer and she might want to go Monica

but she understands that you you know when you're in a relationship sh in those environments it can get a little bit tricky so I'll go but I'll probably want my husband there or I probably want you what what they think is my woman would never they don't think that my my actual loyal women would rather not put themselves in those environments they have this mentality that she wouldn't because I'm the best she has but if she if you were truly the best she has she wouldn't put herself in those environments so look at her choices

look at what she chooses to do and if she places herself in environments where alternatives are presented regularly she does that then she's probably not satisfied and the other thing that they forget is some men particularly young men and in this generation they are they you know if she's bisexual if she brings other women in and this that and the other they're actually very happy about that yeah yeah they they really love that they're like oh my God she's so cool she got other women involved the biggest choke hold you can have on a woman

is when you're the only person that is able to sexually satisfy her when you invite other people in and well man woman whatever it is you're don't you're you're opening the door for her climaxing because of somebody else outside of you you lose your choke hold in that moment I see some of these really like red pill kind of guys who be like oh my woman she lets me get with other girls and she even joins in the moment she can climax because of somebody other than you you lose your choke hold over her there

is there is women out there that I know that are beautiful got many options but because they haven't been with many men and they're a bit like scared of their M they'll stay L to him even if he's in jail they won't go anywhere because they haven't tried other men but other women that because the man has opened that door for her and invited other stimulants into the relationship they you have you lose your ability to get complete and utter sexual submission from her when you invite too many alternatives for her okay all right this

is very interesting all right so the first uh thing you said that really sparked me is this idea that uh too much Independence is a problem so remember and women by the way I just want to make that clear is for men and women I would say that this started with what should guys avoid if they want to avoid being cheated on and the answer is somebody who's too independent yeah uh it's very interesting okay so you're looking out for somebody that you want somebody that puts the relationship ahead of the independence they're willing to

give something up to get that yeah how do you begin to draw boundaries around that like what is the right amount of um submission to the relationship and at what point does it become controlling stifling um reasonable requests are not controlling and what I mean by reasonable requests is objectively we can agree it's not about me it's not about you we can agree that this isn't good for the relationship so objectively it might be the case that let's say you're going to live abroad for a couple of years or a couple of months or whatever

it's probably not good for the relationship we can objectively agree on that and even if it was the other way around we would both agree or objectively we would agree that going out a lot on weekends drinking alcohol is not good for the relationship so it's when we can both agree that it's not unreasonable the way to handle boundaries as a man is you don't sit there and beg her to listen to you and you don't sit there and be if you can't do that you se you see her own choices and you decide if

it is an appropriate selection for you to be with this woman you don't force her to change you allow her to live how she wants to live and then you let her know what you prefer and give her time but if she if she decides this is not how she wants to live is instead of being like well we got to do this you got to listen to me I'm the man I'm this you just say okay fair enough I totally want you to live the life you want but it's not compatible with the values

and boundaries I have instead what they do is they stay there get really controlling really aggressive and be like you need to listen to me you need to but in that moment she learns you don't have a willingness to walk away she learns and that is something you never want to teach man or woman you don't want to teach anybody that you have no willingness to walk away instead what you want to teach them is the relationship means something to you you want to protect this relationship through boundaries and you want them to meet you

in the Middle with that if they do that fantastic if they choose not to the goal is not to be with you the goal is to have a good relationship if you don't want this we wouldn't have a we're not going to have a good relationship so no worries I wish you the best the toxicity comes from the inability to walk away that's one of those that it's so simple but it really is true as you were talking I was like is there really anything other than leaning away from somebody when they do a behavior

that you don't like leaning in when they do a behavior that you do and having a willingness to walk away that's sort of the game that's the only thing but and it works men and women it works for men and women like you can sit there and beg your husband to come home on time you can do all of these things but the only thing that works it works is your willingness to work away now you might say no I walked away and they still didn't change then that person doesn't want you enough that's a

signal instead of begging that person to want you accept their choices if they don't want you enough and you still want to be with them then let them live the life they want but if that you walked away and they didn't change they don't want the relationship enough yeah so don't keep using that trick learn from that trick that it's not working so therefore this person doesn't want it enough whereas if you pull away and they actually love and appreciate you more they obviously want this relationship they want it to work man uh this is

where self-esteem really becomes an important part of this equation it's the number one thing I honestly you can have every ingredient but without self-esteem man or woman no relationship can it can't flourish sadly is such an important ingredient towards the any relationship because without self-esteem there's no self-respect and without self-respect there's no mutual respect so it's a really difficult one so if you if you're struggling in relationships you're not actually struggling relationships you're struggling in self-esteem you don't know how to love or be loved correctly and as a result your relationships are destructive what do

you think has changed that makes it hard for women today to respect and fall for the average man uh men have worshiped sex in a way that they've never done before and as a result what before would make a man want to marry you would involve a woman having a lot of good qualities before a woman would think okay I have to come from a good family or maybe should go to school I should maybe educate I should you know uh really learn how to cook I should do something with my life I should sew

I should do something these are our grandma's generation they knew that the you know you make too many mistakes you're going to be left on the Shelf in this day and day and age the women that are actually the least promiscuous and most traditional don't have sexual experience struggle to find a man whereas a woman with every surgery with every tattoo with all of her body out everywhere she has endless cue of men now they're going to argue no no no but we don't you know we don't want to marry those girls they're they're actually

lying men are very happy to marry the woman that gives them the most sexual pleasure they think that's not true but you ask them which of your exes or which woman had the biggest choke hold over you and it will be usually the woman that they enjoyed the sex with the most and when a woman learns that she can get away with murder simply because your hyper attracted to her it makes it impossible for her to respect and want to be with you impossible because it's like how did I get here so easily you must

not be valuable whereas when we know that certain behaviors will make us insufferable to you because you don't give us a free pass because of our appearance or our sexual performance we can finally respect you so because of the culture we've got today and because how men have worshiped sex in a way that they never really did before um I'm I'm not blaming them I'm blaming societal changes it's made it very difficult for us to respect the man that we know you know if we just simply know exactly how he likes it he'll forgive us

in five minutes or if we know when we turn our back he'll be on downloading an only fan subscription it's hard for us to respect that man okay you're touching on something really big here that there's a what I'll call a derangement in culture uh so you hinted at this idea that in the past we had a very different culture what men wanted um incentivize women to invest in set of skills their obsession with sex was being tampered by something yeah I want to know what what has changed in culture specifically what did it used

to be and what is it now um we had realistic expectations of our sexual climaxing and what our what we deserve sexually so what I mean by that is when a person looked you know wasn't so appealing he would accept that he's going to be with a woman that doesn't isn't the most appealing and they would have a relatively mundane sexual performance and that would be their life and the man that might be you know the jock in school he might get with a cheerleader and theyd have realistic expectations of what to expect from the

opposite gender the Advent of social media and pornography has allowed the person with the least amount to offer a woman to still believe he deserves and still want to desire the top of the range woman who is the most sexually promiscuous who the most sexually overt he still believes there's an element of him who thinks he deserves that now and because they've got such inflated expectations of what they want and deserve sexually they can't match with people who are on the same level as them and it's leading lead leading them to a lifetime of loneliness

because they'd rather be alone than be with a woman on their same level whereas before they would just be like okay I'm a bit you know maybe I'm not so successful maybe I'm a bit overweight my wife's a bit chubby I can understand it I'll meet men who are now in their 50s and saying oh she she's let herself go a little bit she's got a few stretch marks and it's like but tell me about your body oh you I need to work out but she and it's that complete hypocrisy that they've developed through constantly

watching beautiful women online all right is that the core cultural wound that we no longer are being realistic about our own sexual market value yeah I believe so I think the inflated expectations from what we're watching um and not being aware of what we bring to the table is one of the core issues but also the liberation of sex of how like it's got no cap on it anymore so just a normal you know we would kind of just probably expected by time our parents got into our 50s or 60s and stuff they would have

just a normal kind of sex life in in this day and age they're still they endless desires and insatiable cup when it comes to your sexual desires and and because they're constantly bombarded with different ideas it feels like there is an endless hole and there's only so many women that can keep up with that so they keep replacing the women rather than replacing this desire okay so if we were going to assign percentage blame to men and women um and I I definitely want to dive into the idea of deserve more but if we were

going to assign blame to men and women is are men deranging it more or women deranging things more men entirely men entirely and they'll hate that they'll be like no women have lost their this women have I tell you why I say that I happen to be a woman in a very unique position where I have a kind of presence on social media where I do help men like you we we help men on a regular basis and on a daily basis of a short we'll get millions of views and I'll have men message me

saying you saved me from suicide you saved my relationship you've helped me so much and then I will look and I'll think I remember I was going on my patreon I have a patreon where you can sign up and you can ask me questions and I'm doing fine on my patreon but I looked at other content creators who I've never seen before like women that I've like oh I don't know what she's done I've never SE she's got nowhere near the reach I have and this is not in a competitive way I was just curious

and she would have hundreds of thousands of subscribers and I was like oh I wonder what she's doing it would all be pornography related so I just thought to myself I'm in a position I'm not saying this in a jealous way cuz I know that's how they're going to take it I happen to help men on a daily basis but because I don't lead with sex I will never get the reaction or the following whereas if I just started posting pictures of feet toes this that and the other I would be inundated with subscribers so

they reward the most um toxic behavior in society and then complain that women are no longer traditional there's only let's say I don't know the statistics but let's say for example there's only like 500,000 only fans creators or porn creators but there's billions of people watching it so the main problem has to be the men there's only a tiny percentage of women that actually sell sex but there's not a tiny percentage of men that watch it so we have to think who is actually contributing to the problem more okay do you blame men in general

for patronizing it or is there something else that sits on top of that like uh the capitalistic impulse to give people whatever they want so if they want uh a dating app where they can find quick hookups we're going to give it to them if they want an AI girlfriend we're going to give it to them um so where do we start getting into the Nuance because what I'm trying to really tease out here is I I think you're right in that ultimately every individual man is able to start making better choices and get a

better outcome but at the same time culture has energy m and when cultural Energy starts moving in a direction um to look at an individual man who's now bearing the brunt of of not being able to attract a woman um having to work I forget what the status that people throw out having to work five times harder to get a girl that's half as good you know what I mean like that whole idea I think there really is something to that and so I'll look at guys and I will be deeply empathetic and uh something

that I talk to my wife a lot about is you you really have to immerse yourself in the culture to see something is broken yeah and so do you see that that overlayer that's generating some of these problems or really is nope just individual guys making mistakes do you know what I started with a really different kind of message I was very much like you know on proen and really like trying to understand the core problem and the number one thing I've learned in my experience is for them every problem is alleviated through sex they

alleviate a lot of problems through sex if they all have a marriage and instead of like you know the wonderful like techniques that the gotman Institute might say like where you know you say nice things to each other you can say the nicest things to a man you can cook for him you can look after him but if you are not satisfying him sexually he'll risk it all to be with somebody who does it's like you have to go through that Gateway in order to access the best parts of them in order to get that

attachment to get that appreciation to get that love out of them it's like you have to go in that direction first and then they can reward you so it's almost like that's the Avenue now to get love out of them so it's very difficult I'm not saying women are any better um but it seems like I I and I did this because I've been working with couples for so long and we'd be trying this that and the other and then now I just come in when couples come to me the first thing I ask is

like are you sleeping together and she's like oh no we are not and I'm like then everything you've done like arranging birthdays for his mom cooking for him ironing his clothes it doesn't mean anything until he's sexually satisfied so start with that I'm not saying actually that's a bad thing I'm saying if you know know that it's actually a bit easier but I don't know if that's just my experience because I get the skewed end of it but would you say that men can only really appreciate the other aspects of a relationship once they're sex

sexually satisfied women need to feel loved to have sex men need to have sex to feel loved I'm so sorry if I sound a bit negative because I sound so different to how I came last year only because as my prices increased I saw more successful men and then the behavior of more successful men is so different to the behavior of less successful men which made me believe that the only reason men are being good is because they don't have the options and the ability to do what successful men do so it made me then

even get into that is this why you know you hear about royal families and they can become pedophiles or is this why you hear this so it makes me think that as men have more Financial Freedom their selection gets worse and worse which means that their true desires might be worse and worse but we they just can't access it when they're on the lower end of the financial status there is something very true about that and this brings us to um what has changed that's made women have a hard time falling for average men now

yeah um I would say materialism to that as well yeah I I like just like how men are a bit delusional about you know you get men in their 50s and still think that they can get a 25y old women are also very delusional about the wealth that they can access um they spend endless hours looking consuming content online which is just glorifying wealth and then assuming that they deserve that lifestyle and assuming it you you know almost making fun of men that aren't quite on that same level and you know what beautiful girls will

do is use their use sex to access it but less beautiful women will just stay single they'll just say well I'm a CEO or I'm I'm you know working hedge funds so I'm not going to settle for a guy that's on an average earning even if she's but they don't realize for men appearance means more than what you're earning so to get that top level guy he doesn't care that you're so smart and intelligent and you're a successful lawyer he wants to know if you have a 21y old sister yeah that's what he's going to

ask for so I think there's a delusion on both ends yeah I think that's really important to dive into and and I will uh ultimately answer the question of whether I think men can or should have multiple wives That's Prett interesting but um I do want to um tie some of these things up from the very beginning yeah uh where we're talking about what what what's changed what's broken um this idea of deserve I think is a really important idea um what do you think is driving this sense of um entitlement they think if they

see it they should have it it's a simple social media that's the criteria now I've seen it so I want it there is no I've earned it there's no that I also provide this quality so therefore I could potentially ask for it back but it's just I've seen it therefore I want it and whenever you have a quality and you just your Baseline for why you want it is because you've seen it that's not a valid reason for wanting something but if it's something that you also provide and in your past experiences you've also received

because that's what happens then chances are that's a realistic expectations but if it's something you've never accessed and you don't actually be can't provide it yourself then it's an unrealistic expectation so what I mean by this is if you're a very beautiful girl you can expect a beautiful man yes or if you're a beautiful girl and men have spoiled you in the past and they've given you a lot of you know money or whatever it is you can expect that but you've never experienced men spoiling you you've always had men that are you know on

the lower end kind of dedicated to you and yet you want a really wealthy man to propose to you where is this expectation coming from because it's not from your lived experience expectations should come from our lived experiences if they're coming from vicarious experiences that you've seen online they're are not realistic just take them out of your mind because they will keep you single and I I always say there's only two reasons why people are single one reason is where they don't they have excessive self-hate where they don't really love themselves enough and they have

really low self-esteem so they avoid people or they only go for people who don't love them enough and as a result they find themselves in a Perpetual cycle of an unhealthy relationship until it ends or people who have which now more people are falling into where people have excessive self-love where they believe they deserve certain traits and refuse to settle until they access those traits and as a result they're perpetually single so I'll meet men sometimes they'll get to 47 48 years old and they'll say um I want to have kids so therefore I'll only

go for a 25 26 year old I want a woman in my in her 20s because you know I want to have kids which sounds valid on paper and I like okay but she's going to want financial compensation for the 20e age difference they no no I want it to be a a really genuine connection I like but it's the price you pay when you get to a certain age you can't expect a genuine connection from a young girl when you're in your 40s and 50s you have to sacrifice the the intimacy so they they

think that they still deserve that connection but sometimes we pass that same thing I say the same thing with women I was like if you get to a certain age and stage and you haven't had your kids you have and then they'll say no no don't want to be a stepmom so he can't have any children but I want to have kids but if you're in your late 30s early 40s you have to adapt your expectations it's the refusal to adapt expectations and I'm stuck in almost a childlike state of I want my dummy now

that keeps people single should people settle well I think they should redefine what settling means is it is it settling in your case or is it just going for the people that love you here's what people think settling is just being with the person that likes you but that is the look your criteria should be what your type should be people should be how somebody treats you that's it how they look what their size they are what they bring all of that stuff should be secondary your type should be a treatment not a person so

my type should be somebody who's kind who's loving who's loyal yes attraction is definitely important I'm not saying it's not important but the treatment is more my type where people get a bit wrong is that their type has become she has to be blonde she has to be blue eyes and they forget completely treatment is not mentioned they don't even mention the type has to be how much she likes you back as well and how much she's attracted to you back they don't look at that they just look at from a unilateral perspective and therefore

they end up either single or being used and abused in relationships yeah yeah uh sexual market value I think is important and I think people's delusions around that create a lot of trouble and figuring out what are the things that are most important to you I think is really it's really beneficial for more delal who do you think is more men or women uh right now probably women because the way that social media works it really rewards women in a way that wildly disadvantages men so some of the things that we haven't gotten into in

terms of how we're in the system that we're in so you've said previously that back in the day you didn't have to be um you couldn't be beautiful for anybody more than the town that you're in and now you're beautiful for the whole world yeah there's an equally interesting thing going on which is let's say that your 20s is for guys is kind of a throw you're building the skill set you're a bit of a [ __ ] you're you're not confident enough you don't know what you're doing I mean a select few but for

the most part no it's just a dark time uh building blocks building blocks exactly and so somewhere in your early to mid-30s you start to break out now somebody in their early to mid-30s can very much still connect with somebody in their early to mid 20s I don't think that's a big jump so and the generation is in line with each other right exactly so now you've got somebody that's in their early 20s as a woman that can see a guy that's in their early 30s that's really starting to pop off and so now that

20-some guy that would naturally be going for the woman that's only a couple years different than him is competing with somebody that's in their 30s and so now he's got all these years to really just get rejected over and over and over by women that have a growing sense of delusion we were just talking prepping for this episode was beyond fun we just me and the producer Drew just started talking about it and slowly there was another person and then another person and then another person until there was like eight or nine of us like

talking about relationships and everything and like where this is all going and they're they're younger right they're in some of them yeah so we but we have people that are you know late 30s okay so everybody's perspective was accounted for exactly well and then I'm the old guy so that was also account for but the fascinating thing was the one universal comment was oh it's actually easier to get laid now it's just harder to get someone to commit both the guys and the girls felt like that was the case so that's like sort of derangement

Point number one is if what everybody's actually looking for is a long-term committed relationship but there's this sort of invisible change in the sexual mores where people just feel like well I'm I'm just going to try the merchandise before I buy and so it's like you end up in yeah I'll have sex with you to see like is there anything here but and then point number two of just complete total derangement is you can be on the apps all the time endless Choice constantly being like well I had fun with them but was it the

ultimate fun could I have more fun and so now in a world where women are hypergamous they're dating over and up and they can see the level of success via Instagram whatever across a wide squat of humanity have you had what I talk about when I say what hypergamy actually means for women tell me I I would I know that the traditional sense hypergamy is just you know women want someone older richer all of these things I say actually none of that matters women actually their definition of hypergamy is the man that is she can't

manipulate that's the only man she'll find higher pergamus a 19-year-old who's dating a CEO who's 40 years old far more successful than her taller than her uh more in more grades more qualifications everything is above her you would say that she's hypergamous I can guarantee you if she can manipulate every money every piece and get rent from him get a car she will still throw him in the dust and find somebody that she actually respects that's not hypergamy in a woman's eye how pergam in a woman's eyes is we can't fool you simple she would

rather be with a man that is less successful less intell she not that she'd rather be but she'd be more submissive to a man who's less successful less intelligent might even be a bit shorter but he doesn't fall for nonsense he knows when she he's she's trying to manipulate him she she can't trick him she can't manipulate him so I believe hypergamy is defined purely by the art of manipulation not actually by the arbitrary things of course we want someone richer and taller but a baseline of that only matters if you're more intelligent than us

and we don't Define intelligence by financial success we Define intelligence by can I manipulate you yes or no if the answer is no you are not an idiot you are not going to pay my rent while your own daughter's rent you don't even consider or you are not going to buy me a car because I slept with you a couple of times you're not stupid but if we find that oh my God I can tell him that I need his card and he gives it to me straight away or I can tell him that you

know I lost my job so I need rent he gives it to me straight without me even knowing him that well just because immediately she loses respect and therefore the hypergamy disappears so I think you're on to a really important addition to hypergamy but I can hear the men in the comments screaming right now like I can't be manipulated so yeah but I still can't get a date uh I think the key to add to that is that uh it has to be someone that the woman would want to manipulate and so if she's not

drawn to you attracted to you finds nothing interesting about you doesn't matter that if she tried to manipulate you tell her to [ __ ] off you're not interested whatever um there there is a dynamic there so first there has to be mutual desire and then there has to be a very mature uh thing in it it's funny so I don't think men look for Mutual desire anymore I think men with high self-esteem do I think men with super high self-esteem I think the Baseline is men with super high self-esteem reciprocity is more important than

Beauty as long as she she wants wants him as much as he wants her and this is like she they men with high self-esteem only know what women look like who like them so they know women to want to take their clothes off they want they know women that are calling their phone 24/7 they know women who are initiating sex that's what men with high self-esteem that's the type of women they're around men with low self-esteem which is getting more and more don't care if she wants him just as long as he gets to touch

her so that's where you'll find these men that go to escorts you'll find these men that go to webcams these men that go you know travel you know um passport boys they don't care if she wants him or not just does she let me have sex with her they're not looking for Mutual desire as much particularly as they get older you think they're not looking for Mutual desire or they have given up on I don't think they know what it even looks like because they so replaced Mutual Desire with attraction from their perspective I had

a a video that was got a lot of hate where I said that um the use of prostitutes is um legal rape and I believe that men who look for Mutual desire they realize that consent is not simply somebody saying yes it's somebody who wants you as much as you want them that's what true consent looks like in their eyes whereas men who use prostitutes consent simply means yes regardless of whether that's manipulated consent or whether that's you know groomed or whatever it is as long as she said yes so even if you had to

get that yes through an envelope on the table they'll take that yes they just want permission but men with high self-esteem they don't want permission they want desire desire is their true form of consent when a woman desires them so I think yes I do believe women are delusional with what they want but there's nothing more delusional than that man that as he gets older and older and older still wants that 19 20y old but wants her to actually want him she doesn't she's not going to want you is Trump raping Melania uh consensual rape

and there is a thing it's where the consent is bought on and as a result it becomes consensual rape so you don't think it's possible yeah that she thinks ooh like he's so powerful and so good at what he does powerful and Status all of these things only matter when the underlying attraction is them let's say yeah that my wife is in a car accident and she gets burned is she raping me if I sleep with her uh no because the underlying attraction is there even though physically that's going to be tough physically now it's

going to be tough but your premise for being together was is not destroyed because it wasn't that wasn't the premise of you guys being together that wasn't the contract but if the premise of Melania and Trump is that this guy's smart he's uh an amazing politician businessman whatever do you think she would be with him if he was broke tomorrow like lost everything of course not right so then the premise is the cons the contract says you have to maintain the conditions of which when we first met yeah whereas when it's love and connection and

commitment we understand the conditions can change but we're committed to you for them they're committed to what their side of the deal with let me um change my answer slightly in that would she stay with him if he lost everything and was trying to rebuild um I don't know I literally when I'm surprised I remember her name so that is like how not attached to that world I am but I remember Lisa being very impressed when Melania was asked a question about you know why are you with Trump he's just with you for your beauty

and you're just with him for his money or just somebody said you're just with him for his money and she's like hold on but he's just with me for my beauty like why is there such a double standard yeah now my thing is I really do think that there's probably more credit to give to cuz what I always tell people is don't worry about getting the money become the kind of person that can earn that money so it's like most NBA players will never earn a championship ring but they should still be just be proud

of themselves for being so good at something that they were able to make into the NBA so they're still the 1% athlete exactly become capable of a championship performance even if you never win a championship so it is possible that somebody is just so good at a thing that somebody finds intoxicating that they're able to get past that so I agree with my wife there are things that I'm into with her where the looks can and will fade and I'm still going to be way into her but I think that there are far more Dimensions

upon which people people can be connected where I wouldn't call it consensual rape not that I'm ruling out the the only reason I would say that is you have to think that is if the condition in which you chose to marry this person if that was to change would you still be connected to the person or you connected to the condition I think it's all all conditions all the way down so if I stopped um if I stopped having a growth mindset and being persistent and taking care of myself and finding my path to confidence

I I I agree um and same with my partner I would say the conditions are you have to be kind to me you have to be loyal to me you have to be loving to me those conditions have to be met but my underlying and your underlying conditions are not transactional they're more mut they create Mutual connection whereas for some people they are they don't those conditions don't create connection they are just conditions so it is just Rich you stay beautiful you stay rich and once either of us breaks the contract we go because there's

no actual Connection in that creates longevity which I look I here's a thing I have no problem with transactional relationships I actually think in this day and age I can actually understand why a woman would say you know what you can't trust men anymore they all cheat they all do all this nonsense i' rather be with a rich guy have all my kids with a rich guy and then if he gets divorced we get divorced I completely understand that guy and similarly I totally understand the man that says you know what women they're all the

same headache they all want the same thing why I why would I be with one that doesn't give me any sex when I could be with a young girl that's constantly got energy and she gives me sex I totally understand the transaction but what I don't understand is the delusion behind it if you know that's what you're going for don't expect intimacy from that connection so I I'll meet people in those relationships where the man genuinely believes there's an intimate longlasting monogamous connection but it's not possible if you're just I agree with doing absolutely anything

you want just don't be delusional about it if you're dating a woman half your age that doesn't speak the same language totally fine you're using her for her beauty but expect her to be using you for your looks men are genuinely believed no no no she loves me she loves me because of the term hypergamy because I'm more powerful and more successful women only care about those things more once they're fundamentally attracted to you they have to be attracted to you first then we give a [ __ ] if you're intelligent and in powerful and

successful but if that underlying attraction is not there then we're just using you and the underlying attraction can't be there when there's a significant age Gap some people will say no no no it can 90% of the time when couples like that happen she always leaves with a younger man she'll leave with the broke personal trainer she'll leave with somebody that's around her say because here's the thing with women we fall in love with connection and we have the most connection with people who are similar to us and when we got huge age grabs he

might be gorgeous but we are not connected to somebody that is from a completely different generation or anything they're just not connected so this is something that men forget the reality is women were designed one of the reasons why women can move on quickly from heartbreak and relationships and go from one man to another is in evolutionary times if they lost their partner to war or to Predators or whatever it is they would have to find another one even if they shared him with another bunch of women they would have to do that otherwise they

die so we have these instincts in us that we can't always explain now a woman's instinct is always to be somewhat looked after it doesn't even have to be Financial but just knowing that a man looks after that could mean did you get home safe did you um was work okay did you get on your flight okay just checking in women really value that yeah that checking in whether it's Financial investment or emotional investment they need it in order to feel safe for a man the nurturing is really important for him that nurture is their

way of understanding you appreciate them when you nurture them they take it to mean you love and appreciate me when you don't nurture them they take it to mean that I'm an ATM here and no one cares about me so they get drastic with their responses so I would say that the emotional Financial investment is what women generally like to look for and the appreciation and nurture is what men tend to look for okay so a lot of women are having a seizure over that right now uh let me ask should a woman yeah submit

to a man's leadership I think that when you meet a man who is so is such a safe bet and so secure submission is a natural consequence now if you refuse to do that because you don't see like it's just goes against everything The Narrative you've been taught you're depriving yourself self of a really beautiful relationship I'm not saying submit to every man but a good man who cares about your well-being you'd be a fool not to submit to him you'd be AF foord to argue with him uh you'd be missing out on a great

connection simply because you want to maintain your Independence but Independence is overrated give give me details on what it means to submit um can a woman be a fully actualized person completely her own woman driven boss babe and still submit to somebody's leadership or does that mentality break the potential relationship it's a little bit harder I would say that it's a little bit harder because you get so used to your own authority when you are independent but I would say is delegation you might want to have a really great career outside and Be Your Own

Boss but at home there's certain decisions that you allow him to lead on and you allow him to lead on because you trust his leadership and you don't you giving him that Authority is because he's earned it through trust love and Leadership you know you can trust his authority you don't need to have a say in every single thing in life sometimes you should just relax and if you are that boss bve don't you want some areas of your life where you don't have to think and somebody else can just lead it's good for you

it's recharging your batteries so I would say that if you are really successful find areas where you don't have to think it might be when he plans a holiday when he chooses where to live or something like that instead of fighting that Embrace that as a way of your off period you don't have to think you can relax and see it as in a positive rather than negative okay so how does um how does a modern woman who is very driven very sharp uh she is working she realizes hey I'm really good at this decision-

making thing um why would she come home and submit to somebody else's leadership why not just maintain the leadership role uh because she shouldn't be with somebody unless she if she's really a you at decision making she would have chosen a partner that she can delegate decisions to if you're really good at decision- making as a woman and you're really successful and you really know your [ __ ] you don't be with a man that doesn't that suggests that there's an a whole in your self-esteem if you've chosen a man that you don't truly see

as effective decision maker as yourself so if you are all of those things then your partner selection should have been also great so great that there are parts that you can just delegate and then allow him to lead on now are you saying that women are hardwired cuz we both have the norstar of human flourishing yeah so are you saying that women will flourish more if they get with no matter how powerful they are if they get with a man that is they are the right person to lead yeah in the family life I'm not

sure where you well the thing is you if you if you really want to flourish choose a man that you can who can put blindfolds on you and you trust where he's going because uh essentially there's going to come a time either through kids or through age where you Tire yourself out from being that Boss B because you're not designed for it we're not always designed for it it's beautiful it's always designed for or not designed for I think we're not fully I I think we're not I think there's a time where we are designed

for it when we're young and we have the energy or when we've got potential but at some stage in our life we get to the point where we do we um T retire earlier and it's again it's evolutionary we're not actually designed to be so driven all the time all day every day we're actually designed to be looked after and kept safe so as much as you might have all this energy now at least choose somebody's for when you slow down and you take your foot off the pedal he can take the steering wheel and

if you haven't chosen that you've effectively adopted a son that you didn't choose interesting okay so let's keep going down this road so um I hear you saying that this is really just an energy question yeah is it an energy question or is it a hardwiring question in that a woman who and for for the conversation we will assume the man is worthy you see him as uh an incredible person so this not like you're submitting to a bozo so you found a guy he's a worthy leader yeah it's a word um are you saying

that no the only time you need to submit is when you you get tired you know go do your thing and then at some point later down the road submit just because you get tired of doing it or are you saying that this is really the result of evolution and evolution has left women in a psychological position where they will actually be happier if they submit to a worthy man's leadership yeah I think it's the latter I think you would genuinely be happier and you reserve more energy and if you submit to a man who's

worthy of submission from early rather than you know one day burning out and then thinking now I want a man to save me because I'm so exhausted and tired and I meet girls when they turn 33 onwards they're just so tired of doing everything themselves and they'll say to me I am just tired of even carrying my grocery bags from the car into the house I'm so tired of that I know it's so more but I just am so tired of it whereas when if you pick somebody and you delegate and you submit and you're

going along what will happen is you have more energy throughout life they give you that that's what a man should be he shouldn't be a burden he should be somebody that you look forward to submitting to because you trust their process you trust their vision and if you haven't found that then you're going to suffer so why would it be that Evolution would leave women in a situation where they don't want to have to lead all the time they actually want to Outsource a lot of a lot of the decision making uh to a man

why would that be what is the reward has Evolution giving them a reward or sorry children what happens is and that's why baby brain is a real thing women that will say I've got baby brain what they mean is once they become a mother their brain is absorbed by becoming a mother they literally start seeing their life through the lens of their baby so they'll walk into a room and be able to spot the danger and say that's danger this so they stop being able to think about themselves and they stop being able to think

outside of the lens of a baby so if they don't have a man that they can rely on they not only have to look after the baby 24/7 but then they have to worry about him and and they just get overwhelmed whereas when you have that secure man and you've submitted that you can submit to when you go into baby Zone it doesn't matter the the ship is still sailing he's got everything else covered but when you don't you then have to put your feet on both pedals and you're going to be overwhelmed so because

we're designed to be mothers we're designed to have somebody that we can submit to when we become preoccupied with the child okay so in a modern context when women can push that off off off off off off off um why not why submit if you never plan to have kids um because you still run out of energy at some stage at some stage in our life we don't have this we don't produce the same endorphins and stuff at some stage or another and also um what Joy is there from being completely independent isn't life more

beautiful when you share it and depend on one another we're designed to be I want to stay I want to stay close to this idea of submitting to leadership so um for a well so let me ask a slightly different question then would the optimal life strategy for a woman be to um Be Boss babe mode until call it roughly 30 to 35 and then so be with a guy that does what you say during those years and then no there's going to be a natural break somewhere in there and or maybe I just had

a series of relationships and now at 30 to 35 I'm going to settle down I'm going to find a man that is worthy of submitting to and and and I'm really submitting probably is a word I don't like I'm translating from them I don't like that word but I'm going to be able to Outsource some of the decision- making so I can focus on my kids I think a lot of women do do that where they be with a man that they can control and then switch it up for a man that they want to

take control from I think the worst thing you can do is be with a man that you can control un even before you have a baby even before you have a baby because it gets you into the habit of seeing men as a nuisance rather than an addition to your life when you have a man that you can control what happens is you end up raising him yeah he activates your maternal Instinct rather than your sexual Instinct so you end up having to raise him having to check if he's there and so on and so

forth he becomes a burden to your life and therefore you start to glorify singlehood whereas when you are with with a man that you don't control and he actually helps control you you see the beauty in a relationship so I think when I meet women who are with men that they control especially in marriages they become disrespectful to him they speak to him badly they become a woman they don't like whereas when they're with a man that takes leadership they actually remain respectful they remain kind they remain in awe of their partner for a long

time so I don't recommend ever being with a man that you can control you become a woman that you don't like unfortunately very interesting okay so if being with a man that you can control activates your mother instincts what activates a woman's sexual instincts being with a man that removes her fears and what that what I mean by that is physical fears like you're scared of other people whatever if that exists Financial fears emotional fears when you're with a man that removes fears and replaces it with safety and connection and you know mutual respect then

what happens is it Act your sexual desires you can like your mom says you can only orgasm when you trust so when he takes away your fears you can develop trust you might Wrangle this into fears but I I believe very strongly that there's one more piece of the equation if you really want to activate a woman sexually and that is you have to make her feel beautiful yeah I agree I really agree I I genuinely think that a lot of women when they deny men sex it's really because they haven't felt beautiful in so

long so they think that if you don't find me beautiful what is the point women again I know I keep using the word narcissistic when it comes to women but our sexual experiences narcissistic uh how much we enjoy it is entirely based with how you make us feel how beautiful and loved you make us feel and this is one of the reasons why I know I keep going back to pornography I encourage men never to watch pornography when they're growing up when they're young because what happens is they develop a dysfunction erectile dysfunction and when

a remote woman doesn't feel attractive she can never desire you again if a man can't keep his erection in the first couple of times if they haven't established safety and they haven't got their loving relationship but first couple of times you can't keep an erection that woman cannot sexually desire you again because you make her feel so ugly in that moment even though it's got nothing to do with you even though it might have nothing to do your the man's like inability to perform may have nothing to do with me but there's women take it

so personal so personal and they'll never desire him again ever whereas another man who makes her feel like the most like a goddess she will desire him again and again so it's in your best interest to not worry about what move or what angle or whatever just make stroke her ego in that moment honestly man mik mik drop on that all right that is um that's very interesting there's no Universe in which you don't get hate from women on some of this stuff yeah what do they say and with love in your heart because of

course course I what do they say and then with love in your heart what do you say back to them um I struggle to find the love in my heart a lot of the times if I'm very honest but what I would say is usually it goes straight to appearance um appearance is usually the first go-to and what so they don't even attack your argument they're just like it's quicker and easier to attack my appearance um they'll call me ugly they'll say that it's all makeup they'll and if they if they don't want to say

that they'll say it's all surgery and all this nonsense so they they'll usually go to appearance then if they don't want to sound too bitter because going for someone's appearances really um it sounds a bit too obvious then they might go for your qualifications and they might say oh but you know psychology is a [ __ ] degree anyway and it's it's not proper qualified it's not this it's not that so they'll go for that and then final and uh kind of B is they'll go for my um my chasy so they'll say I bet

she's a slot I bet she's an escort so it usually goes in that order so they either attack you physically or academically or they attack you sexually so one in those usually in that order yeah interesting so they're not cuz what I was hoping they were going to give a counterargument very very rare that I find that it's very rare that I'll find a woman that will actually argue against what I'm saying they'll F make it completely personalized and this is something I wasn't prepared for when you go on social media when you go on

social media as like maybe an influencer or somebody who's promoting makeup and beauty and stuff you're very prepared for your appearance to be judged because you went on it for that I had zero idea that that would be the focus so what happens usually when I say a message that they don't agree with it goes straight to my appearance it goes it bypasses the message and goes straight to my appearance or my uh sexuality or something along those lines and um to kind of lower my status as a woman wow that's very interesting okay I'm

going to try to channel what I think would be a more effective argument somebody that's really going to address IDE in out like you're a bad so um if I were talking to my daughter I have to step outside of my own belief system for a second so I I'm going to say what I think I'm going to Steelman the argument and then we can get into what I actually believe uh so I want my I want to make sure that my daughter can fully Embrace autonomy that she learns to think for herself that she

doesn't turn to anybody that she realizes we don't live on the Savannah anymore that yes there are going to be some evolutionary winds at your back but you don't need to be a slave to your instincts and I want you to become whoever you want to become and you can become anybody there are women that have become astronauts there are women that have become rock stars there are women that become Prime Ministers and presidents and liter soldiers there is nothing you can't do and you are as smart as a man uh the intelligence distribution is

such that I mean I I know the literal intelligence distribution is such that there are more men at the extremes so you have more brilliant men but there are more moronic men so you're going to be smarter than a lot a lot of men and so like really push yourself if you want to be a mathematician be a mathematician if you want to go into particle physics go into particle physics and you'll find somebody that you can love and you'll find somebody that loves you and if if they want to stay at home and take

care of the kids that is absolutely fine MH and yeah just the the greatest joy in life is being who you really are m i I would say that but I just think genuinely speaking I think worst case scenario you want to be who you are but at least pick someone that if you needed to submit to you could even if you never need to you might never need to pull on that doll and you might forever be then he's going to pull you honey in to I'm speaking to my daughter not calling you honey

I want to make that very clear uh my my young darling that is uh he's going to he may steal your dream right and you'll end up supporting his dream and it's better to find somebody that supports you yeah I agree I agree yeah no I do agree because the thing is I wouldn't be able to do what I do if I didn't have that and so I definitely agree that having somebody but here's the thing I wouldn't uh like what I mean by having someone you could submit to I wouldn't submit to a man

that's suppressing my dreams and suppressing my potential because he obviously doesn't know me and doesn't know my uniqueness or appreciate it so I choose somebody I would personally submit to when people hear the word submit they think of a tyrannical leader telling you what you can and can't do what I mean by that is you choose somebody Who You're So aligned to you and so somebody you're so respect and you respect each other that if you needed to BL blindfold yourself you would trust him with where to go and if you don't find that why

would you submit of course not but when I say submit I don't just mean pick a man and listen to him I mean have a man that genuinely sees who you are understands what's best for you and therefore will guide you in the right direction and if you need him to take the wheel he will just usually what I mean by that yeah okay so now I'll see if I can um articulate my point in a way so normally I would be inflammatory right now cuz I find it so fun to just be blunt um

okay remember that I'm married to a woman that I respect an incredible amount yeah but my advice to women is I believe there is enough evolutionary pressure at your back um and enough evolutionary pressure at Men's backs that for a husband and wife to be a team against the world and for you both to accomplish what you want to accomplish the following Dynamic will work best given that 50% of you is unchangeable and that is I think hypergamy which is the female tendency to date across or up is is a very real thing and that

women are very just evolutionarily you have an algorithm in your mind that will make you very comfortable with a man that that is equal to you in all things or above you but you will not be satisfied in a relationship where the man is below you yeah and I think that men will be happiest because I actually don't know what I think about women I think I I don't yet know and maybe as I say this out loud I'll I'll have an opinion come to my mind men I think will be at their best in

the relationship if they feel powerful right and they're not going to feel powerful if your better than them at a lot of traditionally masculine things leadership being the easiest one to Peg to they actually produce more qutool in relationships with women that earn more than them or take more dominance so they literally experience more stress uh biologically and biochemically which actually decreases their testosterone so they have less sexual desire and more stress when they're around a woman who's more successful than them isn't that weird it is not weird at all to me it's fascinating but

that rings so true and there's a great quote of course said by a man um but everything is about sex except sex that's about power and the fascinating thing about when you were talking about a woman will not want to be with you if in those critical early moments you don't get an erection because she internalizes that is you're not attracted to me and I remember hearing once that women don't like um photos of a flaccid penis but that while they of course do not everybody listening they do not want you to send them dick

pics of Anis but if they have to encounter a penis they are far more interested in one that's erect and so um that's so funny yeah from from a sexual vantage point because it means you find me desirable right so flip that now and for the guy if he's not getting an erection he doesn't feel powerful of this I assure you m and something is going wrong where his he's in his own head as he would probably say he's worried about something some element of it to do with the woman it could but there could

be a thousand I I've said this before on camera I will say it again uh the first time probably not the only time but I will admit I am blessed cuz I stay in shape my life is very attractive they are precious few times where I have a hard time maintaining an erection but it has happened the first time it happened was so funny that I it wasn't funny at the time but in the retailing it's funny so uh poor at the time living in an apartment with thin walls and the guy above us we

were having this really hot steamy moment like in a random part of the house and or apartment and we were going at it going very well and the guy upstairs sounds like he's dying of empyema I mean he is just hacking up a lung and he's just coughing and it's that wet gross and so I'm just slowly losing there was no music there was no oh God it was so horrible and so that had nothing to do with my wife but it I didn't feel powerful I'm in my own head he sounds like he's dying

it's just really [ __ ] gross going so yeah I was just like oh God and so once you're in that zone now it had nothing to do with her but that is when you sort of break that spell and you're not feeling confident you're not feeling sexy you're not feeling powerful then it you're in real trouble um so that is there there can be a whole host of reasons why you end up in trouble with that so anyway getting back to the initial thing I think that if if for the the man and woman

to work together I don't necessarily know that the woman needs to submit but the guy needs to lead right and so but I I have a real strong belief in life never ask someone to slow down so you can lead right which means the guy has actually got to be the right person to lead that's it and so and this is what I hold myself accountable into my marriage my wife is [ __ ] amazing she she's the best business partner I've ever had she's unbelievable she has an incredible business mind which I think took

us both by surprise we were like wo you're really good at this a and so that's been amazing but it also made me realize yo I've got to step up my game because I've got to outperform and because I want to be the right person to lead now hey everybody Public Service Announcement leadership is about knowing when to follow and so there are times where my wife is just better at that kind of decision making and so I'll be like you're better at this than I am so saying that you're the quote unquote leader does

not mean that you're an idiot and you don't know when to listen to the other person exactly and so a good leader also knows when to follow but that that really does not mean that we lead equal percentage of the time and I would say this in front of my wife I would give her every opportunity to say that I'm I'm not being honest trust me she agrees and so my wife the thing she's always said is I want to be as powerful as humanly possible and I want you to be so powerful that I

can be small in your arms a and I was like homie you get me like that's that's the juice because if if you couldn't authentically make me feel like that and if I didn't authentically make you feel like that this wouldn't work and so this is where I have empathy for the red pill Community all of this [ __ ] is complicated it is very hard I think you know when you shoot above your range when it comes to a woman either you're choosing somebody physically out of your league or um you know intellectually out

of your league you always suffer you as a man and I know that they they they kind of think no no it's okay to be with a woman that's 10 times more beautiful than you or it's okay to be with a woman who's more successful whatever you can fix it unfortunately what will happen is she will use what she has above you to start losing respect for you sometimes so it's always if you like you said if you have to slow if you have to get some people to slow down for you to leave it's

a recipe for disaster so it's always better to just shoot within your range find a woman that you are naturally able to lead rather than picking what whoever you want and forcing her to follow your leadership it won't work that way just pick within your range what I love about the way that you talk about this it is hyper practical yeah and that is very much what I want for people so I'm not saying it's good or bad that it is this way but it is this way it is this way if you're going to

choose a woman that's 20 times prettier than you are handsome unfortunately she'll feel Irreplaceable and she might just start disrespecting you whereas when you pick somebody on the same level as you what will happen is you both feel Irreplaceable to each other because you match each other so I meet so many men that are being abused by women and they're staying there because she's so beautiful but she's abusing him because she wants she knows he's not going anywhere he also does not respect himself which is why he tolerates that yeah and so that's why I

just think shoot within your range and so this the problem with today's world is people are losing sight of what their range is whether that's Financial or physical because of the materialistic or the kind of physical attributes of men and women are being highlighted on social media so we think how does it make them lose sight of their own range though because they think it's accessible it's far more accessible than it is just because they see it because they see it when we see something we assume it's somewhat within our range so men are seeing

beautiful women all day every day and they're thinking it's more accessible and when they're not getting it they thinking oh okay I just need to make more money but if you have to rely on something external to access that that means it's not actually for you it's not actually joyed for you yeah I don't know about that do you think so I think if I had to you know get a few surgeries to get the right guy for me we're not right for each other and similarly if a man had to make a a couple

of thousands a couple of more million to access me he himself is not right for me yes so uh do I mean yes here what you're saying is very complex in that if I needed to if I really wanted you and you would have nothing to do with me and I go make a couple more million and I come back and now you want me Bad News Bears avoid avoid avoid but if you go make a couple million different women will now be in your league that's just real and ladies this is not me encouraging

you to get plastic surgery in fact I've talked my wife I my wife used to be insecure about her nose which she has talked openly about I love that [ __ ] nose a so um I did not want her I would never have wanted her to get surgery right it's not like she was contemplating it or anything but when she was a kid she did and when she brought that up to me I was like oh my God I love your nose um but if she had gotten a nose job when she was a

kid more guys probably would have been attracted to her right so it's like that's real I yeah I get it but I also think that you brought you're compatible with it has to be in line with your actual self-esteem not your extrinsic value so I do think that yes let's say for example I get a bunch of surgery and stuff like that sardia is still sardia she has a level of confidence and self-esteem that is pretty much stable now I might end up let's say I get loads of surgery and I end up being with

I don't know Chris Brown the reality is the real me is incompatible with him and I won't know how to navigate that kind of man I will feel insecure in his presence I'll feel like every woman is my competition because the next girl with more surgery can attract him I won't feel like I attracted him I felt like something external attracted him which is easily replaceable similarly if you have to make a coule a couple of million to get hold of that pamla Anderson kind of woman unfortunately what that mean is you become replacable all

it takes is somebody else with that money the real you and the real person that you trct on will eventually become Irreplaceable if you use internal ingredients to attract a partner if you have Let Yourself Go I wouldn't say it's just men or women if you've let yourself go completely your partner might still love you but they do not desire you the desire decreases if you're totally different to the person they signed up for yes I know there should be unconditional love but it's there's not unconditional desire desire is something that is more visual based

so you owe it to each other to remain somewhat in the ballpark of what you were when you met and remain somewhat attracted to each other because there's just too many alternatives to that now it's just guarding your own marriage is to go place a guard where women get it wrong is that they just expect he should just be a desire me and he should just love me and he should just I know he should but he just won't you've got to remain somewhat in the same physical capabilities as you were when you first met

for him to remain satisfied some might stay loyal but they won't necessarily be satisfied it's interesting I think where people put their shoulds they need to be very careful cuz he should just be into me now you're setting yourself up for disaster but do you think men should also just realize that sometimes you can't maintain that level of physicality for the rest of your life or is it something that they can't always adapt to they just no I think dude look message to young men yeah for your own emotional well-being when you get with a

woman and you decide this is you're going to make a shot at forever yeah you want to make sure that that person feels safe yeah and the safe isn't just physically safe the safe is emotionally safe and so when Lisa was 22 I was like I want you to hear me right now mhm you are beautiful you're young you're gorgeous you're in great shape you have an amazing body beautiful face but you won't forever MH and I'm still going to love you I'm still going to desire you and I want you to understand why I'm

going to desire you at that age because we're going to spend the rest of our lives investing in each other being there for each other um sharing sexuality keeping this as hot as we can like doing all these things so that there's a playfulness there's a bonding to it there's a cration of that right now we have youthful skin and we look great and you know all that stuff but life moves in phases yeah and this is a temporary phase and I want to take advantage of it while we have it but I don't want

us to ever be surprised by how we will change and so making those Investments early on of both telling her you're beautiful now I'm extremely attracted to you now and in the future I'm going to be just as attracted to what could you do that would make would could potentially make you less attracted to her because the problem is when men don't vocalize when they lost attraction and then they just have a slow resentment towards their partner because they're noted don't do silence yeah so there have been times where both of us have not been

in Peak physical condition and look I used to walk around with six-pack abs I'm now more more like a two-ish pack abber still still very impressive still in reasonable shape like I no big deal um but it's not like Lisa's like hey what the [ __ ] she knows that I'm capable of being in better shape but there's a band in which she still finds me attractive also the band is like you not become a physically lazy person I think it's more the laziness that finds that she might find unattractive but you're still in good

shape it's just maybe we Peak and trough at different stages but she she hasn't seen you turn into a gluttonous person that she can no longer recognize so but is there anything she could do that would make her non-attractive to you physically or both uh so emotionally yes that that would be very easy if she stopped appreciating me became hostile belligerent um if she ever used my insecurities against me in a weaponized way all of that that's ugly to me uh so that would be very problematic obviously Infidel is just not start I ever speak

to again that would be that it wouldn't make you lose it's just lost the relationship with them yeah over I would lose respect for and I certainly wouldn't be attracted to it um physically yeah if she got lazy and let herself go and wasn't putting energy into her appearance um if she didn't try to be sexy for me um that would be problematic like I do expect her expect her to make an effort as she should expect me to make an effort and I think that's something that men just need to be more vocal about

when they're speaking to their wives because it's so much better to have that difficult conversation than to have the difficult conversation that you've been texting another girl or that you've been watching X Y and Z it's just an easier conversation to have so be brave enough to have that conversation rather than tiptoeing that conversation and waiting until the car crashes and you know she finds something terrible out so it's just I don't know why why do you think some men struggle to have those open honest conversations is it because the recipient is not very receptive

probably not they don't understand it themselves they don't understand it themselves and when I say that if there's shakiness in your relationship your woman is not looking at you like a hero she doesn't make you powerful she doesn't anticipate your needs uh she's not making an effort or just any one of those things right there's a a thing that's off in your relationship and somebody else gives you that attention the way it feels is so intoxicating it's like when a woman feels like imagine your husband makes you feel blah or even downright ugly and then

somebody else is like wa you are stunning what that's going to do it's going to light you up in a way and it doesn't matter who it's coming from just the the feeling in itself is enough to attach to it so it's just creating those Moes around your relationship to prevent it rather than resenting these things because yes of course I would love it if you can just get as fat as you want and not make an effort ever again and no worries he'll still be loyal but it's just not realistic let's just be realistic

with each other as difficult as it might be let's just be realistic so that you protect your own marriage is to guard your own marriage not to make you feel low but to elevate the your relationship also what is almost certainly happening to that person to let themselves go like that is all bad yeah nothing's good about that nothing's good they're in a dark place you're spiraling and that's where you really want to reach out for help and work with your spouse you can't just wallow in your insecurities and self-pity sometimes people when they like

really let themselves go it makes them more susceptible to Affairs because they want a shortcut to self-esteem and usually that comes in the form of new attention and stuff so yeah actually the more you let yourself go guys have always worried about the women that maintain themselves but you also need to worry about the person man or woman that's let themselves go they might look for cheap thrills to kind of elevate their self-esteem that's been dropping over the years so it is an important thing just self-respect is an important thing to look for in your

partner agreed yeah I want to talk about the future yes so what do you think is going to happen are we going to retreat from all of the promiscuity the dating apps and all of that or our AI girlfriend and sex robots going to take over uh it's going to go towards sex robots and AI it is definitely going to go more towards that I remember when we first heard the word chat rooms we thought it's just where a bunch of pedophiles connect but really over time we now got to the point where we're all

talking online all day every day it's just got a different name to it so what seems so scary and so un like you know the idea of putting your relationship status online and all these things are so bizarre but then Facebook came and then Instagram came and then everything comes so what happens is um the devil is quite patient with how much disclosure and how much you do online so it starts very small very small foot in the door technique but it will get to the point where there's definitely Ai and sex robots and that

will definitely become um I I heard someone say something I might have been on your channel where he was saying that even the robots will create like fear of infidelity and fear of like fighting and that just to ignite the same human emotion but again without the man having or the woman having to work on any of the qualities that attracts true intimacy so it's a shortcut society that we created and I think for as long as men worship um vagina that then it will get more the capitalist Society will get is never going to

forget that that men will pay endless and one thing I've learning and this is where my jadedness has come from is men are deeply transactional their generosity is limited to the women that they're actually touching and sleeping with and they pay for these kind of things and when you have a capitalist society that understands that men would rather pay for webcam girls than pay their mom's medical bills or they would rather pay a random prostitute uh you know um school fees then pay their own daughter's school fees you learn that men are so like engulfed

in this area of Life the quickest way to become a billionaire is to provide men a sexual access give them something that will give them sexual access and you'll become a billionaire overnight because that's what men reward and invest in sadly and I don't know why that is but they will literally really really put lots of money I I and I see this regularly you'll see men that will literally when it comes to say they they'll say to me oh I don't really talk to my dad that much every time he calls me he just

wants a bit of money or my brother he always wants a bit of money and yet they've got girls that they give so much money to they pay the rent for they pay the car for and she's nothing but disrespectful for but their wallet is open for that girl but for their own family they're like oh no I'm not going to pay him it's there's transactional nature to their generosity and I don't know if that's a new thing or if that's always been there but I have noticed that their generosity is very much linked to

attraction and uh pleasure I admittedly could never be into a woman that was hostile towards me so that never resonates when you're like oh they're kind of toward them that's super weird to me however um if you look at the way that men engage with pornography versus the way that women engage with pornography so first of all female pornography tends to be books so it's a written word describing the internal state how people are feeling all of that um a lot of buildup before the ACT uh whereas male pornography is shots of the genitalia so

when like if women really develop an understanding of male sexuality they will have a much easier time predicting men's behavior so when I hear that these guys put up with the belligerent or whatever and they put up with to for these girls um what's really going on is going to be something like the following I make so much money and I'm so powerful I can just pay this chick's rent and she'll spread her legs for me yeah and that's kind of evil and definitely gross but it's also powerful it's like yep I can just I'm

so good like like it's they're going to think of it in weird ways like this I'm going into this meeting with this guy and I'm going to be able to negotiate terms over him I'm going to win over him and that win is going to come to me in the form of money and then I can use that money to get this bimbo to do whatever I want now this I'm painting a very dark picture a certain type of guy but it's like that kind of chain is he isn't the Sheep that's oh being abused

by this poor woman no and the reason that he doesn't want to do it for his dad or whatever is because they're not triggering any of the he doesn't get access to anything from them that he finds interesting whereas if it's a woman that he is legitimately attracted to and he's effectively having a relationship with her genitals it's like there's still a thing look that that's just an evolutionary drive so wild like can you see why I get jaded I I I would advise you not to get jaded I would I'm praying the reason that

I would say don't be jaded is look it is yeah this is how Nature has made us if anything there's a humor to the fact that uh a billionaire like Jeff Bezos I love love you and I would love to interview you one day and so I hate always using this reference but he's one of the most disciplined businessmen of all time what he build is just unbelievable and he still got caught out sending a dickpic to his mistress it's like it's and you see even with like you know um Elon Musk and both Johnny

Depp and Elon Musk were in love with Amber herd and and so it just shows you that like you know this is there's obviously would be like oh but she's not all that and she's not this but because when you understand the male brain there must be something sexual that has got them attached and it's nothing more than that because the treatment is negative so yeah they do put that as a priority no so yeah like I was saying the reason why I would say sex robots and all of these things it is a dream

come true for men that don't want to work on their skills and here's the main thing and the reason why sex robots will definitely replace everything else is men have confused their desire for intimacy with desire for sex when they finally meet a sex robot they can combine the two in their mind they get pseudo intimacy where you actually get a bit of a connection she'll call you and stuff and they might get to reenact the sex but really what most men are truly craving is intimacy and how you know this is how quickly they

can fall in love with a woman that makes them feel loved espe if they're attracted to a woman and she makes them feel loved it takes very few minutes for them to fall in love because their deep need is to they they don't look men particularly as a man you're built to be in tribes you're built for connection if you are lonely it is a slow death for a man and and literally in a tribal terms if you are lonely you are going to die you need a group to stay alive so the loneliness they'll

do anything to avoid loneliness and they'll do anything to have sex so when you've got when you create an AI girlfriend you have literally if you were going to invest in anything that would make you a quick billionaire invest in those companies that are creating AI girlfriends sadly yeah yeah so let me ask you said earlier that you could now begin to understand why the Quran says that it's okay to have a second wife would you ever let your husband have an AI second wife no that would be even worse i' would be like what

worse way worse I'd be like you're a creep because here's the thing it's just like I would admire somebody's ability to have two wonderful women be in love with you that takes work and effort a man that can get two women to be madly in love with and loyal to him I can admire that as a form of masculinity but having a man in love with me and I'm competing with a essentially a like a glorified iPad is insane to me like how am I competing with something that you have to charge on a battery

like I would be mortified not because of the competition element because he's not the man I would admire a man that is so desperate for affection that he will you take it in the form of something that is electronic is not a man I admire and that's what really my main issue and same thing some women I meet so many women that will say on my husband he goes to escorts but I don't mind that as much because at least there's no feelings and it's just quick dabble this that and the other and for me

it's like I understand the psychology behind escorts it's not the they're not actually going because of the quick ease and release they're going because they want to avoid rejection they want to be in environments where they don't get any feedback on their sexual performance that's really the underlying reason they'll say they'll kind of mask it and say it's because it's easy and you get you pay them to leave I've worked with hundreds of guys that have used escorts every single one of them has an insecurity in their sexual performance every single one because men who

are secure in their sexual performance can get the same service from women that they don't have to pay they can get girls in the club that they'll sleep with that night and they she disappears and he disappears it's not the end of the world men who go to escorts every single one of them has either had issues with ejaculation premature ejaculation they're insecure about the size I love always get it out of them at some point because they'll come to me they're like no no no it's just quick and easy to get rid of them

and be honest with me because you're you're handsome I can see that you've got lots going for you why would somebody like you go to an escort and they then they timidly admit I used to have a problem with a jackulation or I used to have a problem I'm not confident about the size of my penis or some girls have told me that they didn't like it so I just don't want that negative feedback so I I think women if you have a man that said oh I go to escorts because it's quick and easy

he's actually masking is deeper insecurity so to go to a robot I can't imagine the level of insecurity that must be involved there that's interesting I have a totally different take on that talk to me uh so the Tik Tok algorithm is one of the most brilliant algorithms in terms of understanding what you want yeah and giving you what you want to the point where you don't understand how much time just went by yeah and I think that the AI running the robots will be the same so first of all they will get so good

that they feel like a real human but they'll just be that plus more so they'll pass the touring test so when you're talking to it yeah it's not like you're like well this is obviously a robot you'll be like this is a real person and it will be a real person that will sometimes pull away just enough that you feel like you have to pursue and convince and all that stuff and but they will they will optimize for your almost certainly in the beginning anyway they'll optimize for engagement so hopefully that's something positive and they

don't turn into these hyper toxic relationships let's assume that they that you have a dial and you can be like I want to feel good and so it's getting feedback about how you feel and it's giving you more or less of what you need to actually be imbalanced and so someone like me is going to have an AI That's like adding to his life and like pushing me to be better and you know all those things uh but is also supportive and looks at me like a hero and all that so um I am beginning

to hear women leak anxiety about okay I've always had to compete against pornography and the body standards and the sexual enthusiasm and all that and that's already exhausting and now I'm going to have to compete with the the perfect girlfriend who's literally like probably getting biometric data off of you so they know exactly what you're feeling and how to optimize it and oh I see you want my the my body temperature to be like half a degree warmer you're lacking oxytocin I need to do this it could be anything that they could check yeah so

then do you think that's only going to lead to women getting more lonely and lonely women tends to become more promiscuous women well I think they'll end up being a female solve so meaning that females will get their perfect man and so but we don't the thing is I highly I would be very surprised that women would attach to AI robots because here's the thing with men sex is enough to create an attachment for women attachment is enough is needed to create the sex so I the fact that the attachment is in invariably fake won't

create the sexual desire well so now you're getting on to something else I guarantee it will be just as easy to fool a woman into generating desire unless they it's online or is it like a robot no no it' be standing in front of you it it like literally in fact okay can I finally reveal the truth you're a robot I'm a robot the real Tom is upstairs right now so uh you scared me for a second I start because that's probably what it will be like you think in a way like I mean I'm

a very big skeptic and I I always the way I talk is like the world is ending every day but do you do you think there's a part there's a room for this in our world because people are so lonely do you think it's a good resolution no well oh God okay so here's what I think is going to happen technology will ultimately make things better but we will go through a brutal period of transition and that period of transition I will fingers crossed we don't annihilate ourselves with a nuclear weapon or with a biological

weapon but assuming we get on the other side of that yes it will be better but it the long Arc of History cares not for an individual generation so it will happily obliterate Millions hundreds of millions whether just outright death or just a terrible life where emotionally we're all super distraught because we're a transitional generation uh so I don't think we get on the other side in anything approaching a graceful manner yeah and will they create AI children as well like you can have children and now you're on to my fetish secretly I hold in

my head oh God my audience is going to hate me for this I brought it up once before and people went pretty nuts uh I will almost certainly at some point raise an AI child you think so but I'll do it over like a threeyear span yeah and so it'll go from yeah cuz you'll be able to dial the speed so it'll be uh I only want to spend a weekend with that as a baby because I do want to feel like I earned it a baby I mean I'm making all of this up but

I'm just saying when you carry out how the technology moves so in the beginning it'll be like a um a to maachi where it'll just be a very convincing uh thing that you're interacting with on a computer screen eventually it will be embodied as a robot and they'll just get better and better but yeah you'll be able to dial it in the version that I think would be created where it's like okay the terrible twos I only want to last for a week and uh the teenagers oh my God like we're you know only going

to deal with that for a month but then isn't that just going to enhance depression because the whole our buffer for depression psychologically is our ability to deal with tough times and our ability to take rejection our ability to handle loneliness all negative emotion has it's our ability to thrive through it that's going to actually act as a buffer for depression but kind of warding ourselves away from it doesn't create the skills and tools we need for strong mental health so how do we prevent a nation of depressed people the AI will be optimized to

make you the strongest most resilient most anxiety and depression-free human on the planet remember we're going to pass through a brutal period you and I both agree it it will get very bad before it gets good and so in the early days it's going to be kids spending nine hours a day talking to replica on their phone and they you know aren't able to get a real girlfriend in the real world they don't have any of the advantages of it passing like a true touring test it'll be a nightmare but on the other side of

this you will be able to have relationships that are optimized completely to you the most loving what's the intention of this what's the intention of the people that are creating this uh well I mean now we're going to reopen the can of worms around capitalism and all that you you can't get people to work without compensation MH so that means that then money is going to be involved yeah and that's how you're going to motivate people and then if you don't allow them to Garner enough Capital they won't work which is why uh China started

floundering and they had to bring in state sponsor capitalism but nonetheless a variant of capitalism Russia had to do the same and so yeah capitalism will once again get involved so money is the intention money is the thing that but whenever the intention is money then we have to compromise human health that is false okay oh God we're going to derail again sorry for the for me this is fun this would be a good test to find out what my audience thinks okay so money derang people largely because it's a fiat currency that the government

says uh this is money and then they can manipulate it and they not only tax you to all hell but they do uh money Printing and when they money print money printing is the same as devaluing the money that you hold so it's it is another hidden tax so when you hear oh they're printing money and you get excited yay this is amazing the reality is that they're socializing in the losses so they're buying assets which is why people get really mad but they don't understand why they're getting mad because they think I got a

stimy check from the government yes but the way that they do that is they inject that into the financial system by buying assets so the people that are rich that own the assets they benefit and then everybody even the poorest Among Us get diluted so their buying power goes down so they feel like but I got a $6,000 check this is insane I've never had this much money in one check ever in my life yes but your money is worthless now and so now the price of bread went up and so that $6,000 do really

get you much unless you invest it which of course you won uh so when you derange money now you make money deranging now I'm not letting capitalism off the hook for it just creates a win or take all scenario there really is that and you get this increasing divide and so you have to have very um smart policies that encourage people to pay their taxes reinvest in their business and it's never going to be a an equitable system where everybody ends up with the same thing it just doesn't work that way that can only be

imposed by force and once you impose it by force just goes to hell in a hand basket so money is not inherently compromising but if you steal obviously problematic but oftentimes a lot of the theft is coming from the government in terms of the way that they money print to get this hidden tax so on and so forth so do you recommend the AI girlfriend that we be ruled by AI yeah I don't know yet okay so this is one where I'm not willing to seed control yet I may see it and go oh yeah

we really should but right now I just have a knee-jerk reaction to I don't want anything to be able to tell me what to do I have a real problem with authority okay AI or otherwise and but you're an advocate technology you do agree as it's advancing or you do like the advancement of technology I like the advancement of Technology I think it's a one-way Street the way that the human mind is designed you're never going to go backwards okay however I do think that Society will bifurcate and that some people will completely reject technology

and go back to something akin to the 9s yeah I don't see it going back unfortunately but I just um I I think the measure of any kind of um whenever we introduce something new in society how we measure whether or not it's good or not is by the uh remnants on people's mental health because obviously I'm coming from a psychological perspective and if anything is decreasing are or increasing our depression anxiety loneliness it can't be a good thing even if it's causing people to make billions so that's why my it sounds bizarre considering my

life is all built on technology uh from an objective standpoint I don't think it's a a healthy thing for society to get more indulged in the one thing that has caused so much destruction to people's mental health over the last decade yeah but that's just my opinion I think it's a very wise take and I think that um technology is not a Utopia it will be a very bumpy ride but but probably will We Will We live through it or is it going to be in the next Generation we will live through live it you're

going to get walloped in the next 10 years the next 10 years your life will be unrecognizable to a level that will shock you so our husbands in the nursing homes might be having affairs with robots uh husbands in nursing homes probably won't be a nursing home because by then we will have mastered the health things that we need to keep them going so yeah if I in 30 years I will be in my 70s uh so assuming I keep myself in good shape yeah in in 30 years it wof you're probably past what's known

as The Singularity where things are changing so fast it is absolutely impossible to predict okay yeah it's an impossibility it's going to be crazy growing up in London and in the UK where I didn't see oppression towards women if anything I only found hostility Between Women rather than between men and women and I found that the quickest and easiest way to show that you have a fight and you're involved in making the world a better places to claim you're a feminist and com claim that you are out there to stop men oppressing women but in

my personal experience where I kept experiencing is women oppressing other women particularly at work so I found um interesting why particularly at work um maybe it was my personal experience but what I found working with women um in in the UK and working with with British women in general is there was a level of wanting to put being very good friends with women until you feel like they might surpass you and particularly in your work environment and I found that they would encourage men more than they would encourage women in a teaching environment so if

they have a male colleague they'll kind of encourage him towards uh promotion but they wouldn't encourage women I remember walking into interviews and if I would see a panel of women I would automatically know I'm not getting the job and I would i' walk out I'd walk out and just think there's no point if I would see a man woman a man I okay I stand a chance and I would go in with and I always found having a female boss was torturous I always every job I worked in if I had a female um

boss I was a matter of time before I felt bullied out of it I only felt it from women and I don't know if that's a gender thing or if that's an appearance thing or if that is just an age thing cuz I was younger then I don't know what the confounding variable was but it kept me a bit uh suspicious of the feminist movement because I couldn't understand why the enemy was men when it felt like the en enemy was within interesting okay let's start teasing this idea apart um is it possible that the

anecdotal thing experiences that you've had aren't necessarily uh they don't absolve men so we can set aside that men may still be evil and problematic which we will address yeah but well in in the research I know please feel free to Google but I felt like I think I read a study that suggested that 80% of women felt like they had hostility from other women at work we yeah that up at work yeah and I don't know it could just be a TED Talk that I listened to and I just absorbed it because I felt

like that um but I felt like um there was a lot of hostility within women rather than between the genders and I always felt like is it possible you think this cuz you're attractive um potentially without realizing I don't know what the world looks like when you are not a threat to any woman I don't know what the world if I'm being honest and it sounds very very conceited but women see threats in women and not necessarily because she's beautiful it might just simply because she wears a bit of makeup and wears a few heels

and whatever it is so I felt like I didn't know whether it was a personal thing or whether it's just Women Within women I didn't know how to understand it but what I did know is men were never the enemy and have never been the enemy and even and this is why I love Lisa so much even when I do podcasts um I tend to prefer when I aside from Lisa because she's so well established and so secure in herself but generally male podcast host tends to be more encouraging and tends to be very proud

of my progress I don't feel the same outside of that so I it could be my personal experience so I don't want to talk for everybody but that's why I was so skeptical about the feminist movement wow that's really interesting all right let's see what we have here research suggest that women actually play a significant role in perpetuating the gender gap due to the concept known as female hostility I genuinely never went for a promotion when I would know that there was females on the panel I would never go for it whereas if it was

men on the panel I'd be like let me try my luck let me wear something tight and try my luck okay so what is feminism as a movement from my personal perspective I can't talk objectively from my personal perspective it feels like the most privileged members of female history claiming to be oppressed which I can't see why in throughout female history NE historically never had it easier we've never had it so beneficial we've never been so benefited so to see these women and I still believe that we are beneficial to men in so many ways

like personally I know if I got stopped by the police and somebody like my brother got stopped by the police for the same crime I I guarantee you I would leave with a smile and a thank you and I would leave I would safely so I know I'm privileged superiorly to most men in most circumstances I know I can speak to a boss in a way that probably a man couldn't I know I could speak to a police officer in a way that other men couldn't I feel incredibly privileged as a woman and therefore I

don't understand the movement so it confuses me but and I don't know if it's because my skin is so light I don't know if it's because of some element of you know but even if it's that then that would be racism not but that's why I don't believe I don't believe there is a gender issue I still believe like my dad with an accent and brown skin would have a disadvantage against a English white woman in a job environment I don't think he has a a superior chances of getting a promotion just because he's a

man I think if anything she has it so that's why I never understood it okay so now let's uh let me try to steal man the argument on the other side women have only been in the work force for whatever 50 60 years um there's so much historical Legacy of sexism I mean you guys had to literally throw yourself in front of horses and [ __ ] just to get the right to vote yeah uh that's a real story by the way I think she even died crazy Emily something yeah so absolute bananas that the

sort of default stance was of course you can't vote yeah um and even Winston Churchill who I think is phenomenal at first was like Yeah women should be allowed to vote obviously uh so one thing I always say to that when people tell me that is at a time where white women couldn't vote they could still own black slaves that's horrifying let's say for example I'm a white woman who couldn't vote I could still own a black man as a slave so do men have an advantage a black woman so that feels like a black

problem not a male female problem then does it show me that women had it bad if it if it really was a gender thing wouldn't it just be men above women but what's really going on is that there was a class system issues so the reality is if I'm a woman I was claiming I was so oppressed in 1920 I could still get a black man arrested and lynched for whistling at me okay so you're saying the breakdown the problematic breakdown is not along gender lines there's a problematic breakdown along race lines way deeper than

that yeah it's way it's probably more money than it is anything else in the reality of things money is the real uh division between people I don't think it's gender related there's some race to it but I still believe that as a woman of color if I earn a certain amount I would have same or more privilege than a white woman who earned nothing so I would still say it's money related but I don't think it's gender related I really don't think it is it makes no sense to me that a woman would complain about

not being able to vote but she would have a monopoly over a men of color at the time so it wasn't so much gender in my mind I could be wrong if we can remove any of the confounding variables that would certainly make it easier so if we just talk about the things that you hear uh the gender pay Gap that comes up a lot uh women being expected to be at home women having a harder time uh getting promoted at work uh do you have any stats well what what would make me feel like

a little bit what I would try and understand there is when I see women not getting paid as much I have to remember in from what I see is women once they have children choose part-time roles more than men choose to be parttime time after children so like that it makes promotion on a more logical stance less realistic it's just less realistic that I'm going to pay you to do a promoted role when three days out of the week you're not there so it doesn't seem like it's gender related it's circumstantial I don't think we're

victims because we're women I think our biology and our evolutionary pressures direct us in a way that make us less proficient at men in certain workforces but it's not because we're of a agenda it's because of our biological pressures and our personal choices so that's what I experienced um from my work I could be wrong but I think the stats would suggest that women um probably would uh choose to be part-time after kids far more than men would yeah that that I I think the data will bear that out but ad also just don't think

why we why we're creating that Division I don't understand it I think if we looked at it historically everybody suffered at some stage or not yeah and and it would usually be the people who would Escape suffer uffing tend to be the ones with money not necessarily men or not necessarily just white people it would be people with money and so that's why I try not to go down the gender rout and the whole idea of feminism and stuff even though I get so many messages and I'm very grateful for women who are like oh

you're inspiring and I'm like but you need to be careful because I'm not a feminist I'm going to offend you at some point so they're going to hate me so I always try and take it with a pinch of salt because I know the moment I talk about feminism all of that strength that they love hearing me talk about when it comes to Red Pill goes straight to anger and resentment when I talk about feminism which is why I almost feel like maybe I am gender neutral maybe I am a they them because I tend

to be quite balanced and neutral I try to be but is that offensive what I'm saying I know it might be taken as such but I don't mean it in an offensive way um I am not I'm not at all offended to me these things are empirical questions that have data that backs them up uh and so looking at that um seems self-evident so uh to address one part of this which is the gender pay Gap um which Thomas Soul has spoken very eloquently to and he said if you compare um it's basically women that

have never had kids versus everybody else yeah and so women that have never had kids if I'm not mistaken end up outperforming I would imagine uh men and that really it's a mother you can think of it is a mother tax imagine now I would think from an evolutionary perspective that women would feel pretty good with their choice about I want to go home and spend time with my kids um so that one doesn't seem super surprising to me and I always come at it from from a just pure entrepreneur standpoint and I'm like I

could not care less if the person is a woman right so but if you leave which I've never had a guy leave when he had a kid but I've had women yeah many women to because they have kids and God bless like go do your I'm very happy for them but the irony is I'll have women hey I'm you know I've gotten pregnant I'm going to be taking leave amazing I'm so excited for you and they're like but I'm definitely coming back and I'm always like hey everybody says that you're going to want to wait

until you actually hold that kid in your arms and then make your life decision beautiful decision to make thank you for your service I'm captain thank you for your service guy you know it's a beautiful decision to make but the then the agony about the gender pay gaps makes no sense like I I I know so many women who the moment they have a child every all their career doesn't mean as much to them so when they fight about feminism and gender pay gaps and stuff like that it feels like an empty fight it feels

like a self-inflicted wound that they're trying to cover up but what is it fighting for like maybe I've just got it wrong because I've always been anti- feminism but maybe I've misunderstood it because I've just my personal experience and also I'm very biased I have a bunch of sisters I'm not close to so I grew up with a negativity towards women so maybe that's what made me less sympathetic to their causes so maybe I'm missing something well Lisa I think and I don't want to get her in trouble here speaking on her behalf but the

way that she's always seen this is um she is a strong independent woman earns her own money does her own thing and her take is anything that's anti-men I am 100% opposed to just as I'm opposed to anything that's anti-women um we are partners and if like my whole thing is the whoever the the world is made up of men and women come together yeah celebrate what each other is good at we are going to we we have been evolutionarily shaped to be different but we overlap far more than we are different and recognizing that

we each bring something to the party and wanting to celebrate that to me is the only thing that makes sense I do not see women in an adversarial sense um but at the same time going back to the idea that the brain is a prediction engine women don't make sense to me when I think of them like a man but when I learn about women and I learn how their minds work and what they're biased towards then I can predict their behaviors and women the same with men and so the the thing I worry about

is anything that makes us adversarial which the modern feminist movement seems very anti-men uh and then anything that says there is no yeah and that we're all the same we can be whatever we want that's when I'm like reality is going to bite you in the ass this is going to get really problem I have to preface that I haven't worked in a corporate industry so I don't know what it's like in those environments where there's corporate you know where men do Dominate and stuff um but I do just think you might the privilege I

privileges I have from being a woman outweigh any of the um cons of being them and I and I that might be being a particular type of woman but it just feels like having a feminine energy definitely work works in your favor when it comes to judicial system or when it just comes to getting helping behavior and stuff I don't really feel that um like disadvantage from being a woman in any way shape or form yeah the way that I think this breaks down in reality is men and women are different and so people are

going to be very confused sometimes offended um guys are going to speak in a way that women don't like women are going to speak in a way that men don't like and so they're I I've thought a lot about this when it comes to race and it's really not about any given race it's about who's the majority and certainly who's the majority in power and so if you think about that because I'm obsessed with Japanese culture right but you could make a pretty compelling argument that the Japanese are freakishly racist in Japan in the sense

that they don't even let Outsiders like the percentage of Outsiders they don't try and hide it or anything like that and they'll take pictures of you if you're a different color and stuff like that but here's what I and Dubai is racist I live in Dubai and your passport determines your pay Gap and you know and stuff like that so it's nothing to do with your gender you come in with a passport or a British passport you'll get paid more if you have a Pakistan than a Pakistani passport yeah yeah and I'm Pakistani wait that's

like actually an official thing it's an official thing yeah it's written down somewhere it's an official thing yeah so we could go for the I could be a doctor and somebody from Pakistan with the Pakistani passport could be a doctor and I'll be paid more because I have a British passport and they have a Pakistani passport and I don't mean this in any offense to Dubai or anything like that because I very much love the country to work in but there there is very clear divisions and it's very much like they still get paid far

more than they would in Pakistan but it's definitely far less than I would get as a British Citizen and America Pakistani I'm p and I have a dual passport so I just you know hand in my British passport and I get paid you know very considerably a lot better shock yeah it's shocking but here's what happens in those environments what I don't what I like about it is it's clear as day you can either come or you don't it's up to you what I found difficult in uh in the UK is that it's almost hidden

or it's almost structure so I'd rather just know where I stand and then I can either choose to be a part of it or I can leave uh but when it's not there and it's almost structural I find that harder to navigate because I felt like um there was there is a division in terms of like not so much ethnicity but values because I don't drink and I don't go to the pub after work and I don't go out with them and you know they socialize I'm limited in how much I can access the you

know the In Crowd when it comes to work so I'd rather it just be on paper is that wild that I that's wild yeah I would rather oh God this really interesting rather uh I would rather it not be on paper cuz there's nothing you can do when it's on paper I don't like the Illusions I keep it real with me I get that but humans are like that so first of all they don't like they don't think they're doing it and that's the thing like they don't think I have to say that they don't

mean to do it not from aici place they don't realize they're doing it a lot of the time 100% And when so for instance when I see an all woman company I'm excited for them yeah word do your thing but then I also think that if a guy wants to he should be able to do an all Mail company because then it's like I personally here's what I my current thesis is hire for culture for sure you want to share values with people and then find the smartest hardest working people you can find F all

beier because how I how're going interpret things yeah and you know what paternity leave looks like and you know that they are coming back and I completely understand that um so you know like I said I could be totally wrong but because I'm somebody who's so let's keep it real with me just keep it real with me I'd rather be in an environment where I know what the score is than given the illusion of hope that you can make it but probably you won't no I definitely wouldn't like that you would really no I I

really I can't have a rule that says like I can't do this thing I mean to me that's like 1960s America where like we're literally just like [ __ ] you you're Redline that's what it is is bad isn't it yeah that's really really gnarly and I need to believe that even if one of the things I have to get good at is fitting in cool like so Japan I've thought a lot about this at one point I considered like do I convince Lisa to move to Japan like I'm into Japan in that kind of

way and I thought okay I would have to deal with societal racism I don't I don't want to put that word on racist or is it just the way they cuz I don't know how Des call school of fish I'm much more comfortable saying school of fish because I don't think that they have I don't think they mean it in their heart it's just their country is their country and they are used to seeing a sea of Japanese people and they they don't love the idea whatever I get it I come from America where we're

a Melting Pot and I love that and that's a huge part of my is I think that's dope and I'm a big believer in you you can only get to the truth by having a lot of different perspectives I think that's really powerful I think you want to share values and not share insights yeah um so that I'll just call school of fish where you're up against a school of fish people tend to flock with people that look like them as a proxy for people that think like them and there's an evolutionary reason for that

as well for sure I think honestly all humans really care about is do you share my values that's the that's the thing that everything else is axy color is an indicator of that correct understand it yeah it's a shared it's a shared thing now it can go super [ __ ] wrong humans are weird and we have an Us Versus Them thing and that does not it doesn't serveice well in a modern context no but it makes total evolutionary sense if somebody was a different color tune but coming into your tribe you would know they're

there to invade they're not there to say hi to you so it makes sense to have a level of fear or um skepticism of people of different colors it doesn't necessarily have to mean that it's coming from a negative place or that's why I understand Japanese culture I don't feel like they mean it maliciously they literally don't understand they're so lovely I consider moving there but at the same time I get it white people tend to have a hard time Outsiders they have a real problem with foreigners right okay what what do they think you're

going to do I have no idea that I won't speak to I don't know enough about it but I know some people that grew up in America that now live there and they're like bro when they had a breakdown of who got the vaccine when it was like foreigners were like in 97th place it was like every conceivable stack of Japanese person and then the like sickest oldest Foreigner then they could finally get it but it was like you know your perfectly healthy 19-year-old Japanese kid 100% was getting the vaccine before you you know what

I come there's a weirdness to it when I'm in cultures which prioritize their own culture first I almost just sign the imaginary contract and accept that's the way of it whereas when you grow up in a country which expells the idea of racism and says that where everybody's equal you almost end up looking for the inequalities more there is something to that but I think here's where it breaks for me if you're born in that country it's pretty shitty to say well why don't you go move to a different country [ __ ] that like

so now that's that's rough and as an American like I dig the whole Melting Pot thing yeah so it's like I want this to be a rad place but for people who share my values I won't lie like I care about values yeah and so that's where I can get like I really believe in freedom of speech yeah and so when people are like you shouldn't have freedom of speech then I get the heebie jeebies and then where do you draw the line between freedom of speech and freedom to offend I think you should be

allowed to offend any [ __ ] bu okay so it's an equal the only thing I'll say is you shouldn't be able to inide violence yeah I agree I agree but I think you can offend everybody with as long as you're looking for the pursuit of truth I think if somebody's intention is to find truth and in if you're just trying to be funny if you're trying to be if it's a comedian or something yeah I find that funny I can take a joke okay so if you do you have to be a comedian to

say hurtful things usually with a comedian the goal is to make people laugh rather than the goal is to offend yes but Dave Chappelle makes a lot of people very very very very mad I'm a big fan of Dave chel so am I I'm a huge fan and what I love about his comedy is he's not he he's not far from the truth in in the jokes that he's making he makes jokes but they are what if he wasn't cuz here's what I'm protecting against I do not want anyone to be the Arbiter of whether

they think he's going for truth so I think would say is the truth is never offended by reality and what I mean by that is if I look I'm Muslim I believe it to be true now if you come up with real examples chances are it won't knock my faith but if I believe something that's relatively delusional I will constantly be offended by reality and that's what I always say is if you're offended by reality you have to reassess your truth because reality shouldn't offend you now when Dave Chappelle makes a few jokes he usually

takes reality and throws it in the face of people that are he thinks are warped of reality and I just think genuinely speaking if you stand on truth it won't be offended by reality reality will only confirm your truth I see people offended by the truth all the time then they then they're holding on to a delusional belief I agree with that but who gets to decide what's delusional uh well reality does reality testing so here's the thing like for example I watch Matt Walsh she's what is a woman and um then he would ask

people what is a woman and they're like oh you have to ask a woman I'm not a woman that doesn't there's no they they find biology offensive and if you're finding reality offensive then your truth is delusional but they're going to say that you're delusional that so I'll steal man their side of the argument yeah um you're confusing biological sex with gender and gender is generated in the brain and it is a spectrum and so what you're calling a woman is really somebody that is a birthing person I forget the ver but now what do

you do with that because they believe that they are correct well I would say to that is then if you believe gender is a psychological construct why when you are a man that wants to be a woman do you change your biology yeah I mean I can give you an answer and I can steal man them till the end of time but I think the real question to ask is what should happen to somebody who is obviously wrong but they're saying something well it's said that anything should happen to them we should keep saying they

can say it but we shouldn't be tiptoeing around their delusion oh I think everybody should say what they think everyone should say whatever the [ __ ] they want legally sanctioned to tiptoe and offend the person who is detached from reality which is what's starting to happen I take I take a different stance on that which is that I don't think uh we want people determining what is true I think going back to my obsession the key is that you don't want anybody who gets to be the arbit of what is true because that's where

we run into trouble I actually think the truth is often times very difficult to think the truth is subjective I don't think the truth is subjective I think the truth is hard to identify so think about um Newton so many people say he's the smartest man to ever live but he was wrong about physics but he was so close that we were able to pinpoint the movement of the Stars the heavens and the Earth and all that Newtonian physics got us to the Moon mhm but we needed Einstein's physics in order to create GPS nuclear

energy Atomic weapons Etc so Newton was wrong but it was still useful Einstein is wrong even though he moves us forward but he still doesn't have a yeah he doesn't have a unified theory now imagine if everybody said hey hey hey Einstein shut up that's wrong it doesn't make any sense you need to stop with that because that's what people did when he first came up with the ideas everybody thought he was out of his mind and I think that is super dangerous and yet humans do it all the time so do you the gender

debate do you think the gender debate we should ground it in reality or ground it in people's emotional responses to being offended I oh you can't ever do I hear me when I say yeah somebody getting offended is completely irrelevant yeah and this should all be about I mean depend like you're going to have to break everything up into its subcategories I think people should be able to live their lives however they want I think people should be treated with respect and I think that um you if you're putting forward something as true we should

be able to put it through the scientific method to find out if that actually is true and everybody should Champion that nobody should say whoa whoa whoa whoa whoa whoa whoa that is a thing that's beyond reproach you can't question that you should to question everything everything and so like should we put it through the psycholog the biological testing of just gender genitals or should we just you know accept their reality with that that's going to come down to entirely why are we testing it what are we trying to figure out what's the the purpose

or the point what is the outcome that what is the outcome that's bringing the question to Bear M so I mean I don't live in a I don't know how big the debate is here um where I'm from into buy this non-existent but is it quite a big debate in America in day-to-day existence I never encounter it on the internet on the internet seems so exaggerated on the internet it seems like everybody in America doesn't know what gender means anymore it comes up in some very surprising moments um and I have my share of worries

uh when it comes to uh kids that's where I get concerned yeah um I always get concerned anytime that the biggest beneficiary of any law is a pharmaceutical that is probably a very reasonable thing to be skeptical of so the only stance I will take is everyone should be able to question everything right so people should be able to question the uh pharmaceutical industry they should be able everything all nothing should be Beyond approach and the scientific method should be our ultimate Arbiter of Truth when and we need to pin something down so it's a

way of testing validity yeah cuz I human flourishing human flourishing that's where I come down I agree if you enjoyed this episode watch my conversation with the one and only Robert Green seduction involves the desire to lose control and Men share this as well which is why men are often attracted to women who are slightly dangerous who women who are either a little bit crazy