Casually Explained: Break-Ups

they say that the heart is a muscle so in order for it to get stronger you have to train it to failure and while America is speedrunning that in real time today we're talking about breakups breakups also known in this economy as finding new roommates is when you're in a serious romantic relationship with a partner and then say to yourself I don't want to be with this person anymore you then think maybe a dog will fix this when that doesn't work you then think maybe a kid will fix this but I digress I didn't mean

to drag you into this conventionally a breakup occurs in fire stages so I thought I'd go through each one step by step so you can see where and if you're on that timeline stage one the first stage of a breakup is always the hardest which is finding someone to date in the first place a reason why this stage is important is because the way that you get into a relationship in the first place can really determine your individual attitudes towards each other as it progresses for example when a girl gets asked out and she says

yes she's thinking wow what a cool guy I'm so happy my life's going to be so much better but when a guy asks out a girl and she says yes he he's thinking uh-oh she must be an idiot stage two seeing red flags in the relationship now if you're watching this and think you're in a good relationship right now it might be a good idea to check for signs that it's heading south before it actually gets there so I decided to browse r/ relationship advice in order to become an expert on the topic so I

can share some examples of more subtle red flags you might not pick up on and how you should respond let's say you've been dating your girlfriend for 5 years and you live together one day she's at work and you walk into the living room and see a magazine open on the coffee table to a jewelry ad you look closer and see a couple engagement rings that are circled and one in particular with love hearts around it how should you respond exactly she's obviously never mentioned it but she's clearly cheating on you with her husband so

best to break up and tell her that you're moving on let's say you've been on a few dates with a girl and you feel you have great chemistry while you're creeping her socials as usual suddenly she texts you hey I miss you C can we hang out again soon now this is of course a great sign but you don't want to seem too needy so set a timer for 1 hour so you can respond at exactly the right time after that a few minutes go by and then she sends you a message on Instagram it's

a picture of her in the hospital kissing a bald guy on the cheek with the caption me with my stepbrother how should you respond exactly I know Johnny Sins when I see him best a wait the remaining 56 minutes break up and tell her that you're moving on let's say you're overseas from your partner and have been in a relationship as long as you could remember but are currently having a big fight about the joint vision of your future you want to pursue a more down toe existence on your farm selling hempen cotton clothing you've

grown yourself but they're reaching their financial Peak and want to experience the luxuries of life you message them that you want to end the relationship but they respond to do what to run your stupid little farm I'm the one making all the money how do you plan on being able to afford to do that without me subsidizing you how should you respond exactly you've already figured out a great way to keep labor cost down best to just declare independence and tell them you're moving on stage three the breakup while breakups aren't fun for anyone men

in particular don't don't usually take rejection very well whether it's from girls election results or especially art school this is because if you're a girl and your female friend goes through a breakup the game plan is clear she'll text we broke up to the group chat then you all get together immediately have a few bottles of wine talk some [ __ ] about their ex tell your friend she deserves better and then have a pillow fight or something for guys the game plan is much more simple he'll text the group chat uh just a heads

up me and Katie broke up you then reply damn that that [ __ ] sucks dude you good he'll then say yeah I'm all right and your job is done what else could you possibly do now regardless of whether you're a guy or a girl whenever you're about to break up with someone it's likely to start second guessing your intuition and it would be worth it if you struggled to replace them so you have to ask yourself the most important question to see if you should go through with it who's going to pay the other

half of the rent while Boomers and Gen X often complain that if you live with someone and break up they get half your net worth this of course isn't a problem for Gen Z or Millennials because half of a negative number is pure profit the real pain of course is losing custody of the house plants similarly one of the worst situations to be in when you're going through a breakup is when you have kids this is the worst case scenario because not only is someone breaking up with you but you also have kids at some

point you really have to start wondering how you keep [ __ ] up over and over again stage four getting over it whenever you go through a breakup the most important thing is to not wallow in your own misery you should only do that if your ex finds someone new in two weeks and they're exactly the same as you but hotter now one of the critical steps of getting over a breakup is thinking about how your own attitudes and behaviors contributed to the relationship falling apart and what you could do better next time if you

ask a girl what would prevent another bad breakup happening to them they might say I should be more attentive and affectionate maybe communicate my thoughts more openly instead of expecting my partner to know and make sure I don't make them prioritize my feelings at the expense of theirs to men self-reflection is of course way too complicated as we like to have simple concrete steps rather than vague hypotheticals which is why why if you ask a guy what would prevent another bad breakup happening to them the answer is a simple two-step process bench three plates Bugatti

Chiron after stage four we of course have stage four now they say that one of the best ways to get over someone is to get under someone else but when you just gone through a breakup it's likely been a while since you've been dating and you might think well I think I'm a seven so that's what I'm looking for and then someone else will say I think you're a five now in the dating Market this is called a bid ask spread and is essential to establish away so you can see approximately what type of person

is in your league this is why when I get back on Tinder after breakup the first thing I do is set the radius to maximum but you can pick any size of girl you want now if you've only recently started dating again the first thing you'll notice is how the dating meta has completely changed if you're a girl the first thing you're going to be thinking is what the [ __ ] is a Riz and if you're a guy you're going to be asking yourself why does every girl I match with keep sending me links

to viruses the good news is that even though you might still be hurt by your Fallen relationship through through the experience you've likely grown a lot as a person so at least you'll have learned from your mistakes and won't have to do it all again stage five do it all again from this point you simply repeat the process until you accidentally have a child or you run out of money or you try a polyamorous relationship until they go exclusive and you're the third wheel or you get back with your ex and make it work because

you overestimated your other options or you realize that you can't say you don't like broccoli if You' never tried it so you add grinder to their rotation now one of the worst feelings I've had going through a breakup was when they said but but are you sure do you do you really want to get rid of everything we've done together I mean I mean maybe you could just keep me around and and use me when you want to and as much as it hurt to hear that Microsoft Edge really sucked at the time and I

never thought I'd have to do that to someone again until I found today's sponsor the Opera 1 web browser one of the best features on Opera 1 is their Arya AI assistant you can see I asked at the classic relationship tester would you still love me if I was a worm and it answered it perfectly that made me happy and fulfilled I did however feel slightly bad for waking up at 4:00 a.m. to ask it this question if you tried and didn't get the relationship advice you wanted you can also add chat GPT natively to

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be a lifesaver as I'm able to preview a video in Adobe Premiere for more than an extra minute before the whole program crashes anyway if you'd like to give it a try Opera 1 is completely free and the download link is in the description [Music] below okay imagine you and your wife are 90 years old and are both lying in hospital beds next to each other near the end of your life after being married for 60 years you're both holding hands and you feel her pulse begin to slow she squeezes your hand with all her

remaining strength tilts her head and says I'm moving on goodbye and her heart rate flat lines how should you respond exactly ho these days ma'am you can't just break up with someone and then die get back up beat cancer redownload Tinder and slap the nurse's ass on the way out she's clearly going to hell