Only Good People Get Depressed

one of the worst Parts about depression is that we can feel pretty guilty for just existing it feels like we are fundamentally bad in capable of doing anything at all and for some this feeling has actually persisted to varying degrees throughout their entire life from a young age you might get the message that who you are is simply unacceptable you need to be good you need to be something other than who you are Dorothy row a prominent psychologist and author is best known for her work in the field of psychology particularly her contributions to understanding

the nature of human emotions identity and how people end up so dang depressed her psychological theories span across Fields such as existentialism cognitive behavioral therapy and social constructionism and they all work together in order to explain the basic ingredients of human suffering perhaps one of rose's most famous ideas is this that only good people are depressed what does this mean to understand this we need to do a brief overview of rose's overall psychological theory of the self Rose's concept of the self which he argues is not in inherent fixed entity but rather a dynamic construct

shaped by individual experiences and social interactions is kind of considering the self as a process or state of becom coming well this means that individuals do have some freedom in determining who they are at the end of the day row does also emphasize the role of society in influencing how individuals perceive themselves and the world around them in simple terms people develop a sense of self and from this self-esteem in order to understand themselves and this development of selfhood occurs through our relationship with Society because we wish to be accepted we will internalize social norms

and values that are seen as valuable such as becoming a hard worker or being seen as successful in some way however we will inevitably feel like we have fallen short of these goals from this row argues we can end up feeling pretty inadequate ashamed and anxious this inconsistency between our supposed real self and this sort of social ideal self that Society promotes can actually result in the sort of psychological distress that leads to both low self-esteem and even depression as roow writes depression is a defense it is a way of holding ourselves together when we

feel ourselves falling apart we feel ourselves falling apart whenever we discover a serious discrepancy between what we thought our life was and what it actually is this is terrifying because a person's whole structure of meaning is then invalidated from this row emphasizes the importance of understanding those stories that we often tell ourselves about ourselves these could be called schemas or self-beliefs these narratives we develop early on to make sense of how others see us these stories are important because they do give us meaning in our lives but they can also become way too rigid and

sometimes people will refuse to revise and reinterpret them this leads into one of rose's key Concepts psychological prisons we are our structure of meaning so one way to protect ourselves from this Terror very quickly is to create a structure for it this structure says I am to blame for the bad things which have happened to me and this allows me to cut off from all outside help psychological prisons can be seen as limitations that are self-imposed they pop up in negative selft talk and thoughts that can result in lower self-esteem it is when we start

to take a story that we tell ourselves to be entirely true and unchangeable where we end up following rigid expectations that can then cause depression a perfectionist might for example tell themselves the story that they must be perfect in order to be loved if they fall short of this very high expectation and standard this can then lead to depression as their sense of meaning has become threatened psychological prisons are what we have developed in order to be good in some sense sense these stories served their purpose in helping us navigate the world at the time

when they were useful but as we grow older R proposes that freeing oneself from psychological prisons is a key aim in avoiding depression of course we can't take responsibility for our mental health completely Dorothy row also heavily emphasizes broader social and cultural constraints and influences that lead an individual towards depression she explores themes of power dynamics the negative consequences of rigid hierarchies and the sort of systemic inequality that can negatively impact the health and psychology of marginalized communities compared to other psychological theories Road does not see the individual as entirely operating in a vacuum rather

they are a product of their environment and have likely become depressed as a reaction and defense to external threats Dorothy row and her writing offers a very holistic insight into the emergence of ression in modernity and the role of self-esteem in mental health well many thinkers have also suggested the negative role of social influence on individual psychology Rose theory is a very clear and concise analysis that incorporates both philosophy and psychology in order to find a path forward for the depressed individual still row highlights the importance of acceptance before constant analysis as she reminds us

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