The Book of Genesis, but its Gnostic...

hi have you ever thought that the world is a pretty messed up place I mean did you hear about the most recent insert political economic social or environmental disaster here well an early group of Christians had a story to tell of how it got that way but then the early church burned all of their stuff because they didn't like it and their story was lost until a whole bunch of their stuff was found in a garbage dump these group of Christians were anything but consistent but a little bit of speculation we can finally tell their

story in the beginning there was only God the one the father or the monad from this monad several other entities called aons emanated or flowed from the monad from these various aons they emanated further aons in pairs with each generation of pairs getting progressively lesser in power but this is what it would look like from the inside from the outside perspective all of these aons would be one Collective which we call the ploma everything beyond the ploma is chaos or the kenoma but everything went wrong one day when one of the aons Sophia or the

wisdom makes a mistake for whatever reason Sophia fails to successfully emanate her own child either she doesn't have a partner or tries to have a child without her partner regardless of the reason this attempted virgin birth ends with the monster yal Deo Sophia tries to hide this creation by throwing it into the chloroma YOLO and finds itself alone in the chaotic nothingness and seemingly all powerful because of its nature being born from the ploma and out of spite yel de beo emanates its own children in an attempt to create its own ploma but its Creations

are twisted and broken broken the most important of its children being sabba o and the various evil angels called the archons unlike the ploma which is infinite and perfect this false Poma of yal Deo was bound by his arbitrary rules yal Deo creates a shadowy veil and from it explodes the concepts like matter space time Etc creating the material Universe content with its creation yal Deo declares itself to be the one and only God Sophia hears this and tells it that it's not the only God and gives it the title of samel God of the

blind or saklas the fool yo is angered by this and attacks the ploma the archons take some of the Divine energy from the ploma how they do so is inconsistent among the various Gnostic myths with all this Divine energy yal Deo and archons Tra this energy in the false ploma of the material Universe realizing that yal de beo is a monster and Must Be Stopped Sophia repents for what she did and leaves the ploma to try and talk some sense into her creation Beal the be has serious mom issues and trap Sophia or parts of

Sophia or Sophia goes well ly or Sophia tricks y de beo into breathing his divinity into the world to be honest the gnostics never really agreed on this part of the story but somehow Sophia enters the physical world as well within the ploma the Christ another Aon decides to help Sophia as well as many of yal deth's Creations as possible and sends a part of himself into the material universe and thus Begins the Wacky Adventures of yal Deo trying to keep the Divinity trapped in the material Universe within the universe yal Deo is created he

gaws at his newest creation the primordial human Adam cadmon who has a Divine spark within it this primordial human being having a Divine spark wants to emanate its own creation like Sophia and yal Deo before it but yal Deo won't let it and splits it into two parts the male Adam and the female Eve rather than torture them yalo decides to give these two a prison so nice that they'll never want to leave for as long as the two of them live in ignorance the Divine spark within them will never escape the material world but

there's just one problem a tree sprouts from the ground and in this tree it contains the fruits of the knowledge of Good and Evil which is planted by the ploma if Adam and Eve eat from this tree they'll know that yal Deo is evil so yal Deo tells them not to eat from this tree or they'll die at first Adam and Eve listen to yalo but one day the spirit of Sophia speaks to Eve through a snake in the garden and tells her that yalo is lying and if she eats the fruit she and Adam

won't die but will instead know that yalo is evil Eve eats the fruit and then has Adam eat the fruit and just as the snake told them Adam and Eve don't die but instead receive knowledge the two of them now know that yalo is evil and that their Garden is a prison and that they're naked the two hide but yalo comes looking for them because yal Deo is not all knowing and all powerful he calls out to Adam asking where he is Adam immediately confesses to eating the fruit and blames Eve throwing her under the

bus Eve then tries to escape out of the material universe and back to the ploma but yalo has his archon stopper Eve is then raped by the archons for insolence yal Deo curses women for all time to be subservient to men and kicks the two of them out of the garden it is then revealed that Eve was impregnated by one of the archons and gives birth to her son Cain later she and Adam have a son named Abel knowing that if they defy yal de beo bad things will happen to them the family of Adam

decid to play along with yal deo's God complex and worship him in order to try and appease yal Deo the family plates him by offering sacrifices this pleases yal to beo for now and Cain and Abel are able to grow up into adulthood Cain becomes a farmer of Wheat and Abel raises livestock one day when Cain and Abel present their offerings to yalo yalo blesses Abel sacrifice but not Cain's Cain is naturally upset by this and yal Deo explains that Cain offered plants to be burned as a sacrifice whereas Abel offered a goat to yal

Deo wheat isn't a proper sacrifice because it doesn't suffer before dying this gives Cain an idea and he murders brother yala finds this event hilarious and gives Cain a special Mark that will curse anyone who tries to attack him Adam and Eve are appalled by this and kick Cain out of their family so Adam and Eve try again to multiply and have two children this time a son named Seth and a daughter named noria the gnostics were horribly inconsistent about Nora's character from this point on in the story in most versions she populates the Earth

with Seth but in a lot of nostic text it implies or outright states that she remains a virgin and goes off and does her own thing either way at some point she learns that she is an aspect of Sophia and therefore greater than yal de beo and disappears from the story of Genesis until the flood regardless the line of Seth populates the Earth with humanity and it's here where we have to speculate a lot because a lot of Gnostic texts reference the events of the Book of Enoch and the sons of God from Genesis but

to our current understanding there is no surviving direct Gnostic interpretations from the time of Enoch beyond the general events of the Watchers and the flood but that doesn't mean we can't connect the dots and try and make it work also it's funnier that way so the line of have done a good job populating and peace Reigns on the planet beo isn't pleased by this and sends a group of his archons called the Watchers to Earth to cause Mischief while on Earth the archons get really horny and decide to mate with human women y Deo allows

this because he finds it hilarious and it works so well with Kan the last time the offspring of this Union are the Nephilim who are Giants at first the Nephilim eat all of the livestock of humanity and then they start eating people meanwhile the archons decide to spread chaos into human civilization and teach humans Concepts like magic weapons and greed this basically leads into an allout War as humans begin killing each other in Mass yal de beo gets a good chuckle at this meanwhile four lesser aons or possibly archons who switch sides the gnostics were

incredibly inconsistent with their angelology anyway these four Angels ask Christ if they can go help Humanity Christ gives these four Angels a rescue mission these four angels are Michael Gabriel Raphael and in the original Enoch the fourth is Uriel but in the Gnostic text this role seems to go to an angel called alith the the Four Angels then go to Earth to kick butt Raphael and Michael take on the Watchers Gabriel fights the Nephilim and alith stays on standby because noria is hiding somewhere and he helps her later as the archons and the Nephilim are

getting destroyed by the Angels yalo rage quits and decides to destroy everyone in a great flood but not wanting to give up on his play things yalo beo finds one of the few people on Earth who hasn't been affected by This calamity named Noah and commands him to build an ark for him and his family and to put two of each animal on the ark so that they can repopulate the Earth as he's building the ark Noah is approached by noria who has learned that yala beo plans to destroy everything in a flood and asks

to board Noah's ark Noah tells her no so noria breathes fire and destroys the ark this alerts yal de beo to her presence and he sends more of his archons to try and stop her the archons threaten to do to her what they did to Eve but noria uses her fire breath to fight back noria is then joined by alith and the two of them scare the archons away then alith carries noria out of the earth back to the ploma well on the way alith explains to noria the entire cosmology of the Universe from the

fall of Sophia to their predicament right now the reason noria is able to leave Earth with alith is because she has attained nosis meaning that she can now Ascend to The ploma Once alith and noria return to the ploma noria becomes one with it and reassumes her role as an aspect of Sophia one of yalo archons sabba O sees this and realizes that yal Deo has been lying about being the only God this all time so he repents and apologizes nor i/ Sophia forgive him and Saba o is given the Throne of the seventh heaven

to rule over meanwhile back on Earth the Watchers are bound and thrown to a pit and the Nephilim are dead but because the Nephilim are half Divine their spirits still exist as demons who wander the Earth Noah finishes rebuilding the ark and yel de beo in a seething rage floods the Earth killing everyone else the Earth then floods for 40 days and 40 nights and Noah and those aboard the ark survive ending up on top of a mountain Yan basically calls for what I could best call a peace treaty between it in the pooma yal

Deo won't flood the Earth again as long as the pooma doesn't invade again with this promise or Covenant y Deo and the Poma are stuck at a standstill yo still has billions of souls worth of Divine Essence trapped in ignorance these Souls need to have a mind to understand that they're trapped meaning the souls must be in a human body before they can achieve nosis and Escape like noria did be Al Deo also needs these souls to have a body so it has something to mess with if the Poma simply sends an army to attack

y to beo well then he'll kill everyone leaving these Souls trapped in the of matter unable to escape but yth won't have anything to mess with so both sides will lose with this plan of mutually assured destruction yalo simply waits as Noah and his family repopulate the Earth so at this point the descendants of Noah were completely loyal to yal Deo and repopulate the Earth living in total servitude to him no just kidding they immediately try to build a tower to try and kill him yalo gets mad at this and curses them confusing their language

and then destroys their towers scattering them to the world from here the people split into various Nations but yalo gets bored simply watching and decides to once again mess with Humanity so yal deth goes to a guy named Abram later renamed to Abraham and tells him to go to Canaan because Abraham is going to be the progenitor of yal deo's chosen people but VAR Shenanigans take place with Abraham's slave and her pregnancy and Abraham's family drama is boring seal Deo decides to let out some of his blood lust while waiting for that drama to subside

and what better target for his wrath than the city of Sodom the problem is that Abraham's nephew lot lives in Sodom so Abraham pleads with the Alta beo to spare the city Abraham proposes that if there are 50 good people in the city that it should be spared yal beo agrees to this proposal and then Abraham proceeds to haggle with yal de beo the number down from 50 to 10 yo sends two of his archons to go get lot and judge the city while there a gang of thugs try to R the archons and the

archons blind them ELO then destroys the city he also kills Lot's wife by turning into her pillar of salt for disobeying him after Abraham's family drama was over he and his wife have a son named Isaac Isaac becomes Abraham's greatest joy in life so much so that yal deth gets jealous and tells Abraham to sacrifice his son as a test of loyalty Abraham has no choice and agrees he takes his son to the top of a mountain and just as he's about to stab his son to death an archon appears before him telling him that

he's passed yal deth's test for doing this yalo gives Abraham a blessing promising that one day his descendants will rule the world Isaac grows up and has two son sons of his own Jacob and Esau Isaac decides to transfer the blessing of yalo to Esau but is tricked by Jacob into giving it to him instead yalo finds this act of deception interesting and allows Jacob to carry on this blessing but first yalo sends an archon to fight Jacob to prove his worth Jacob wins and is given the name Israel Israel would have several Sons but

his favorite was Joseph yalo hatches a scheme that he wants to pull off in Egypt so it gives Joseph A Dream in which Joseph rules over his brothers Joseph tells his brothers and of course they're angry at him and sell him into slavers heading for Egypt while in Egypt Joseph gets # Meed and thrown in prison while there he gets the power to interpret dreams and interprets the dream of other prisoners the Pharaoh is given a strange dream by yto beo and has Joseph interpret it for him there is going to be seven years of

good times and seven years of famine that will soon follow Joseph is then put in charge of preparing Egypt for this famine as predicted the famine is horrible but Egypt is fine Israel sends his sons to EGP eypt for food and after various Shenanigans Joseph forgives his family and Israel and all of his family are then invited to stay in Egypt and from there the sons of Israel would be fruitful and spread all throughout the land of Egypt and they all lived happily ever after that is of course until yalo put his plan for Egypt

into action tune in next time for the Wacky Adventures of yalo and Moses