20 Harsh lessons I learned at 38 but wish I knew at 20

I turned 38 2 months ago and here are the 20 lessons and harsh truth about life that I know now as someone who is in her late 30s but these are the lessons that I really wish I knew earlier on in life in my 20s and the first one is that no one is coming to save you if you're are waiting for someone to comeing to help you solve your problems from everything that you going through in life then you are only going to be met with disappointment because the truth is everyone is is having

their own problems and the only person that can save yourself is you so don't wait for that Knight in a shining armor to come and step in to save you of course we can always ask for support from others but the only person that can actually solve your life problems will have to be yourself every single thing that is worth having in life comes with certain sacrifices there's always a price to pay having a healthy and strong body comes with sacrifices of spending your time in a gym preparing the meals and working out to keep

yourself healthy while other people is doing something else fun having a child will bring joy in life but that comes with sacrifices of spending your time raising that child or the stress that comes with it and all the money that the child will cost a good relationship takes a lot of work and a lot of sacrifices sometimes you have to think about what your partner needs and not just what you need and sometimes you have to be the bigger person to forget and talk things through and work things out together so with all these great

joy in life we have to be able to look beyond the first sequence in order to meet the second sequence which is all the greatness that comes as a result of sacrifice the only way to build true wealth is by owning assets that will increase in value over time if you look at wealthy people on this Earth the only one thing that they share in common is that they own assets rather than just purely relying on income and you can do this with being entrepreneur or working a full-time job if you are an entrepreneur then

focus on building your asset your company if you are someone who is obsessed with property or real estate own multiple property and real estate is how you build wealth if you're someone that work for a company and work full-time and you don't plan to change your career then instead of just relying on salary you can ask them for a share option own that portion of the company rather than just relying on monthly pay this is how you can actually build true wealth when making life decisions pros and cons lists are useless because as I mentioned

before everything good in life comes with sacrifices and of course with every Pros there is always going to be the cons the better thing to do actually is to ask yourself whether or not you can bear the alternative of not doing that thing or or not making that Choice Health should be the number one goal that everyone prioritize because if you don't have your health you don't have anything anything that you want to do in life require you to be in a decently good health when we talk about health I think for a lot of

people we tend to only think about aesthetic or looks but good health actually goes way beyond that and therefore prioritizing your health would allow you that ability to do everything else in your life the seventh lesson is actually something I learned from the book the psychology of money and that is that things that never happened happens all the time and of course we shouldn't be spending our everyday life being in fear and thinking that the unthinkable is going to happen but we should be prepared just in case that it does don't be afraid to change

one of the lessons that I learned from someone that I look up to recently was that when she took over a business she was hesitant of making change and she wish that she would make changes much sooner and therefore if something doesn't work in your life right now it is okay to make a change whether it be changing career changing where you live changing who you work for you are allowed to change and you're not trapped by your past which leads me nicely to the lesson number nine which is that although you allowed to change

understand that every change that you make in life will come with a loss whether that be losing your old self losing your pre previous work schedule your old routine or your old Behavior you need to lose something in order to become something else lesson number nine learning is for the lifetime and not just at University this is something that I really wish I knew in my 20s in order to keep growing as a person in order to always improve yourself you always have to be open to learn something at any phase of your life and

therefore learning new knowledge and skill is for the lifetime and this leads me nicely to the sponsor of the video today skillshare as a new business owner one of the very important and practical skills that I realized that didn't get taught at University is social media content creation and this is a skill that I would like to focus on learning from skill shareer this month in order to level up my social media marketing for my personal Brands and my business skillshare is the largest online learning community for creatives with thousands of classes led by industry

experts across illustration design productivity marketing entrepreneurship and more I recently started a course social media content Creation in canva and I already know that the class will massively help me in creating beautiful designs and if you too want to level up your career skills Hobbies Joy skill share today the first 500 people to use my link in the description will receive a one- Monon free trial of skill share it's not always other people's fault I think a lot of times when things happen in life we always want to blame other people and of course in

certain things at certain time it was really someone else's fault but I would encourage you that whatever is happening in life that is not going the way that you expected to go always ask yourself what was my part in this how did my action contribute to this as a result feedback is fundamental for any positive change and in order to get a good feedback so that you can improve you need to take an accountability for yourself and for your actions not all relationships are the same and what you're willing to accept tolerate and work with

your partner will look different from other people's relationships and this is something that has been kind of bucking me lately about the internet where people give dating and relationship advice because the problem is all of us are different people and relationship takes two people coming together and they will set their own boundaries they will set their own rules and therefore every relationship is different so one advice that is working for one couple may not be working for another and therefore if things are working out for you in your relationship don't listen other relationship advice on

the internet that says otherwise it's better to try and fail than living in regrets always it's much better knowing that you tried and it didn't work out than living with the feeling of what if and living with regrets according to the book the top five regrets of the dying one of the most common regrets that people have is I wish I'd had the courage to live the life true to myself not the life others expected of me lesson number 13 be the partner that you want to have one of the lessons or mistakes that I

had in my relationship in my 20s or my early 30s was that I was expecting my partner to be certain way however what I was expecting of them wasn't even something that I was doing myself I would expect them to be romantic I would expect them to surprise me from time to time but I wasn't even that person myself I wasn't being the partner that I like to have so before asking something out of that person make sure you are actually that person first if you want a kind person then be kind if you want

a romantic person then be romantic no one thinks about you as much as you think about yourself period This is truly something I wish I knew earlier and even if they think about you the truth is people forget and they do forget quickly number 15 extraordinary resource is always an outcome of a compound effect all your actions compound over time to produce something good in life you don't go to the gym one day and miraculously change your body it is a result of working out consistently for months and years and those compound over time which

give you extraordinary result and similar to going to the gym in order to have a good number of subscribers on YouTube it takes more than just uploading one videos the internet is forever whatever you upload on the Internet is most likely going to stay forever so before you harass someone on the internet before you post online remember what gets uploaded to the internet most likely is going to stay forever number 17 a lot of life problems can be solved by very simple things and those are moving more eating good foods and getting enough sleep because

whatever you put into the body is whatever your body is able to produce our don't stick with bad friends just because you've known them for a long time and when I mean bad friends I mean friends that don't respect you friends that always disappoint you never keeps up to their words friends that don't make effort but always expect you to be the one making the effort and people change people grow apart just because they were good friends in high school or university but they're not good friends now doesn't mean that you are obliged to be

friends with them lesson number 19 wedding is for a day marriage is for a lifetime and therefore before you commit to the first make sure that you are happy to commit with the latter lesson number 20 you can't always control your emotion but you can control your reaction it is natural to feel certain type of emotions especially when we go through difficult times when we go through challenges however that doesn't give us the right to be mean to other people or projecting that certain emotions out to other people we can always control our reaction and

our action although we can't control how we feel and that's it those are the 20 lessons I really really wish I knew in my 20s if you are in your 30s or 40s and have more lessons that you learned now that you wish you knew in your 20s and please do share them in the comments I'll love to hear them I'll see you in another video take care bye [Music]