Pare de romantizar quem NÃO TEM ATITUDE com você! - Bárbara Moreira - DesprogrAME-SE!

This is one of those videos that is too specific to be ignored, so if you clicked here and think you know what you're going to find, reading about the mistake is to help you deprogram yourself from falling in love with people who don't give you anything I made today's video so Let's go, let's go, be safe because by the end of this video you will deprogram yourself from this Mania, right? This conditioning of falling in love with people who have nothing to do with you, who are effectively giving you nothing, even people who don't support you, and then when you see you is already involved So let's understand this here in a logical way, for this we will work on a sequence of understandings, okay guys, these understandings are highly deprogramming but are placed here by the fissure in a simple way without losing depth, right, because the simple doesn't is the Shallow simplifying the deep is one of the formats one of the forms of the objectives here that we work on this channel Okay, so in an effective but simple way we are going to work on these four understandings okay so stay with me if you clicked here stay until the end of this video Don't waste your time watching just the beginning, just the opening, just the first understanding because here we will see in this compilation and it is this sum of understanding that will make you turn the right key and the first understanding is when you When you think about happiness, many things can come to your mind, it's not true, most people, what is happiness for you , or when you talk about happiness, many things can come to mind? Ah, it's money, Ah, it's love, or, Ah, it's an inner state things ​ ​ ​oh happiness is something that took me a long time to achieve I even have that in my life today but it is something that I achieved and I really want it to stay Maybe at some point it will go away so rare are the people rare is the link people that we are going to make Happiness a reality because this link is a link that is not automatic, it is not installed, it is not programmed in us, it requires a different sense of perception in our culture, in films, in books, even family, friends The people who surround us, the programming Matrix as a whole, will state that happiness often lies in romanticizing situations, we will understand this so that you can understand what passion is, so that you can understand how you are going to let go of that person.

or how are you going now More mature and more secure for relationships whatever moment you are in your life but start to understand this here with me what it is to Romanticize we are not going to go into old concepts it is not a conceptual video it is a practical video so understand the romanticism that we are putting there, it is always an idea that a beautiful life, a beautiful life, a joyful life, a happy life, right, it is in a fantasy, it has to be romanticized, it is in the world of ideas, it is very difficult for us to think about beauty, happiness, Harmony as reality How many times does a person say this, get real, real, real, as if it were a hard thing, reality is naked and raw, and beauty, oh, beauty is in romance, it is in romanticism, so when I watch a Drma or when I watch, I don't know, an American romantic comedy, wherever it is from the Matrix, that comes from it, right, or when I was a teenager, I thought about a little boy from the seventh grade, seriously, or a girl, there's that romance thing, there's that fantasy thing, there's that idea, there's that dopamine generation has that idea that happiness and beauty that are divine characteristics, right, they are not human characteristics that the divine that these qualities are in Romanticizing life and what is human is uglier It is Naked, it is raw, it is hard, it is concrete, it is real see if we have these very unconscious concepts in us These automatic, programmed concepts that reality is hard, it is dull and then you are denying the Real, you are connecting with people who have nothing to do with it Or maybe this person Like I said, did you connect only sexually or did you connect for a friendship or didn't connect at all but you think you're wasting the time you're wasting energy because you got used to gaining energy when you romanticize and then you can say Barbara but I'm not a romantic person you have to understand the concept of what romanticism is, right it's creating a fantasy of beauty in the tarot we have the page of of hearts and the page of hearts he has beauty he is or a princess of Cups is a person who wants to feel eternally in love and then I will put it at that point with a solution for you which is a very interesting and very intelligent exchange that I put this in a Stories or a Live once and several people said it, Barbara, that helped me, it's a simple thing, it seems silly, but look at what I want to say when I talk about the concepts and these ideas, how about changing this romantic thing to your life for poeticizing life see the following romanticism it puts you in this Rai is not ours it's all beautiful it's everything Beautiful people love me I love everyone Wow look at this person look at this person he looked at me on the subway oh you're making it up I think it's pushing you away from the Real because the real is bad but poeticizing what's the difference between this romanticism PR poetry what poetry does poetry doesn't go to the side of Romanticism which creates a parallel reality poetry is about the things that happen the little things that happen in life, right, a poem about a cup that broke, why? Because it's the act of seeing beauty in reality, you understand? You don't have to be like the princess of hearts and you understand that you put on this dress, you know, a little dress and a bow in your hair and you fall in love with everything in life I'm using a stereotype to show you the energy of what I'm conveying the archetype because even though you're not a little girl with the little dress and the bow in your hair, you could be a 60 year old guy there is this archetype of aaa innocence, naivety, believing in what is not real and you are falling apart So when you leave the princess of hearts when you let go of this as if it were your only way of seeing beauty in life and you enter the Poet in poetize you begin to understand that ah a cup broke the cup fell from the table the table was dirty there was a stain a stain on the table a cup that breaks poetry talks about the reality that is small that is fleeting that is temporary that is fleeting but that is beautiful and then you start to make peace with the Real if you become capable of being a poet of being a poet understand this people I really want you to understand because it's not a video to be beautiful it's a video to help you transform the energies are why sometimes I say if you have Watching a video of the program doing a million things for a little while and concentrate here that your time will be well spent and this focus of yours begins to observe, it is not to stay with Lulu who It's yours, Lulu, it 's not staying, because if the solution is to create fantasy, you're going to have problems, for example, with aging, right, a poet, a poet, sees beauty in wrinkles, for example, wrinkles are part of reality and there are a lot of people.

What do you say, God forbid I get wrinkled, oh then you'd rather die young because you have to keep fantasizing that you're eternally young, that won't happen or you have to keep fantasizing that your partner that your partner will never cause problems, that won't happen Sometimes you will disagree with that person you love and you will have to have a sense of reality to have a conversation to have a dialogue. I already told you that I had a relationship with a person, several people like that Delu, I had a relationship with a person who said I'm scared to death of losing you I'm scared to death of losing you and I said So let's talk about this there's no need to be afraid I love you but the person no no no no I'm not going to talk no no no it's over that the moment has come when I had to end this relationship I ended the relationship, we loved the person but the person had no contact with reality at all, so I felt alone in that relationship because the person only related to fantasy, the person imagined who I was and I wanted to be real, you know these relationships in which the person is relating to an idea of ​​you and you want to be real So you feel alone Observe people less romanticism more poetry in life let's go to the second understanding What is it it's passion Let's put it here on the screen, right, projection plus brain chemistry plus cultural programming imagine these three things that are very strong things when they come together it becomes Irresistible it becomes like a force much greater than you so let's understand this projection plus brain chemistry plus programming cultural, what is the projection that we have in one video or another, I always find a way to put it here, when you project onto someone else, you don't see the other person, you see an unmet need from your childhood, your adolescence, even from a past relationship, right, or do you see a trigger, a trigger there that that person causes in you, but in any case, a trigger is also still a projection So you had an absent father, for example, just to illustrate And then you look for that person in your partners there who will be present that person who will be with you that person who will put themselves ah Barbara but that's normal and that's even good a person who didn't have a father figure present they will want that perfect presence in their spouse if it were just that but what happens to you You start to see things in the person that you would like your father to be, that 's the problem because there's no problem if the thing was mathematical if it was cerebral if it was mental and rational, right, I lived in a relationship that wasn't interesting, it wasn't pleasant now I know that I deserve something better or I had this father, this mother like that, but I worked on myself , I saw that I deserve something better, so I value a person who has this dedication, look how wonderful, isn't that what projection is, this absent father I'm giving you an example, it could be a mother, it could be other things, but this absent father there, when a guy gives me even the slightest attention, I'll tell you why Because I really want it, so I'll overvalue it, no, the person isn't really giving you any attention. Interesting, no.

the person is not giving you respect but that crumb, that's why the person remains for the crumb because you have an unmet need as a child or as a teenager or as a young adult that you are still giving a lot of relevance to, right, to how people people treat you after you become an adult, you become more emancipated, but at this stage of childhood, being a young adult, everything is very big, everything is very powerful and that was stored in you, so you project it, right? And then your friend says wow, this guy isn't giving it to you and you say no you don't understand this person is incredible for the crumb the little thing for you that had nothing is a lot So imagine This is just one of the three points is the projection so you imagine this person is giving you this crumb But you're increasing this because you're projecting an unmet childish need, add this to very good sex, very good attraction, holding hands, cuddling, bringing the person to you, all this chemistry, oxytocin, dopamine, serotonin, all of this. that and you are already naturally not naturally but programmed, you know, the understanding, one thinks that reality is horrible And then you have dopamine, serotonin, wonderful sex, wonderful chemistry, a cup of coffee, you laugh with this person, you have fun, you are distracting yourself from your reality with this person it's like it's a drug you become Rai And that's all you want because you want to escape reality which is terrible so you're programmed to understand the Real So you're already projecting father mother relationship prior to this onto the person you don't You're seeing the person as they are, but you're seeing what your scarcity triggers want to see projection, right?

You have chemistry, a bunch of crazy neurotransmitters, oh I need it, I need to touch this person, I need to talk to this person, Wow, that voice is very beautiful. wow, the touch and you combine this with the cultural programming because you see Ryan goslin there with his wonderful wife there you say oh my God I want to form a couple I want to walk hand in hand on the street I want you have these images of a relationship Romantic people, how can you have a Triad like this and not fall in love? It's not very difficult, but what are we going to do from now on?

reality with the good and the bad begins to see what you thought that it was a defect, a defect in your body, that's it, it's part of nature, look how beautiful it is, right, a whale in the ocean, the whale is beautiful, zoom in on the whale, it's full of barnacles, the barnacles stuck to it, but those barnacles on the whale are beautiful because that because there are some animals living there, you know, there are some animals living there, it's the life that's in the whale, it's beautiful, look at your body, your body is beautiful, right at your age, your shape, your weight, it's beautiful, it's ugly, but it's beautiful. ugly but beautiful, it 's all together at the same time and then you start to see this person as something that is also ugly but beautiful, it's weird and you start to understand that this set of things is very good It's a trigger of dopamine really D um Wow I want to get out of it's very good you get high with your friends it's very good but the Real is also very good also very tasty you start to get out of the Panic of in reality you start to not want to seek seek seek what you don't Here you start to understand that, well, I was waiting for a message from this person, this person didn't send me a message, this person, this is also very bad, this is horrible, so it's very nice to have the expectation of a romance, but it's horrible to feel like this while waiting for a message waiting for a deal has the good and the bad has the good and the bad so let's start leaving passion to teenagers because it's normal for teenagers to fall in love because they have a lot of this scarcity of how they were raised is It's normal, people, he's forming the prefrontal cortex, it's not normal when he has a fight with his best friend, it seems like it's the end of the world, isn't it, but let's leave that to this person who is still in formation, still in the perception of the world, I'm not saying that every teenager is going to fall in love, there aren't some who already understand that that's not what love is about, right? I'm talking about age , but this way it's more normal, it's part of the natural thing.

that passion is this Triad, but love can be real, passion will never become real, that's why after a while in the relationship the passion ends, it really has to end because it has to end with you projecting your father and your mother in your partner you start to see the person as they are you start to see the limits of the business it's normal, right and that's why I ended this relationship I gave the example here because this person didn't want to see me ever she would never see me and she didn't want to see me it seems like I said the same thing in the same sentence, right Why Why don't you want to see Bárbara ? both, right, so it starts Observing this I'm projecting too much I 'm wanting to get out of my reality too much in this touch in this affection in this conversation in this joy Don't I have to put more beauty in my real poeticize life not romanticize and even what it is cultural programming, okay, but all my friends, all my friends, are couples with someone just me, other than you, you're not everyone, so see what's weighing the most on you, it's the projection of the people who raised you, of the love that you didn't get the attention you didn't get the validation of the security you didn't get So you need to put more validation in your real life you need to put more security in your real life right you need to put more sense of connection in your real life So you resolve this projection Ah, it's the sexual chemistry that gets me a lot, let's put more pleasure in your life because pleasure isn't just touching, affection, sex, let's be more versatile in understanding what pleasure is. Do I take pleasure in mine?

work so I'm going to work on my brain chemistry I'm going to work on my generation of serotonin in my reality too and cultural programming This is the second understanding Let's go to the third And then guys, I was elaborating these ideas here to pass on to you and a poem came to me that I I read it 500 million years ago that it's a little poem that everyone learns, right, by Carlos Drmon de Andrade, but I was a child, I remember there was a little pink book with a little flower, a thin little book of Drmon's poems and this poem came to me And then I looked it up on the internet then this poem I didn't remember the name of the flower and Carlos drumon de Andrade's nausea I remembered the poem like this a flower was born on the asphalt but it's not a flower was born on the street right it breaks the asphalt it's ugly but it's a flower I said people This poem came to me and I'm very inspired, right? Carlos Drmon's poem. Now I'm uploading the videos and then this poem came to me and that's exactly it.

The flower was born on the asphalt and it's already a contradictory thing, right? It's ugly, but it's a flower, right? your reality is like this flower that was born on the asphalt, right?

It's ugly, it's ugly, sometimes it's ugly, it's not so cool because a very beautiful and undoubtedly beautiful flower will be born in a garden, right? this flower that grows in a garden is you, very rich with this big boy with this hot girl in the Maldives, right? So this romantic beauty on Instagram, for example, is a flower that is only a flower, it is a flower that is in the garden, it is us wanting to see literal beauty which is only beauty, right?

Eh, but this flower from Carlos drumon, the flower that grows on the asphalt, is you at your job, it's ugly, right, getting a crowded bus, it's better you're on the beach, it's ugly, you work in the summer, sweating, right, in the fan, do you want it? Whether it's on the beach, you want it, it's ugly, but it's a flower, why? Because when you watch a movie, a romantic comedy, a drama, like I said something, right?

Especially in dramas, you see that boy taking that crowded subway and sometimes he's a bit depressive and you romanticize it Because the films romanticize it, right? Why is the person in a Bad Vibe? Because you know that up front you'll find great love and everything, but when you're getting your ass full, you don't feel good, so You can see that we were really created to look at beauty only with Fanfic only with fantasy, right ?

work is ugly but it's a flower, you know, it's beautiful and it's ugly, it's all together with what energy do you want to tune in to, right ? a very annoying person because he is a person who is very convinced of things, he is a nuisance, not a nuisance, he is also a nuisance, a person who will defend what he feels but what the hell, he is a person who is not very malleable, right? He may seem arrogant, he is annoying, sometimes people are boring, you only think it's cool because it's helping you in some way, I'm channeling my boredom at work, you know, so you start to understand Just like I said about the whale, an insect, also the insect, it has its little wings, right, it has its paws You say, Wow, what an insect ugly but pretty but it starts to fit you into reality, it starts to make you less anxious and stop overvaluing Bel Horizonte to São Paulo, because I came very alone and everything else, a very alone phase of mine, it's something like that, I won't remember the song exactly but she says I know I'm supposed to be unhappy unhappy So she says I know I should be feeling bad for being alone because I don't have someone but I'm not someone, right?

So alone you have you and that's very beautiful, you know, connecting with another person it is very beautiful to be with another person too but sometimes you are absent from yourself in the relationship you have to be absent from yourself sometimes you have to to the detriment of your desire to give in So everything has the beautiful and the ugly There it goes for your work, connecting with the flower, it's ugly but it's a flower and the last understanding here to close this perception is the following, people ask themselves a lot, right? And who am I attracting and they observe a lot? Wow, I always attract the same type of person to me.

In my life, I always attract the same type of woman, the same type of guy, I always attract the same type of problem, but people don't often ask themselves Why am I attracted? Only this type of woman doesn't find out why you're always attracted to these people, right? you attract people that you don't care about it's not a problem now if you attract these people and you want something then they don't give you anything it's because you are also attracted to a specific pattern that isn't good for you and then when you ask yourself this question who am I attracted to and what does that say about me and how can I improve that ?

even with her inner universe being attracted to characteristics of characteristics of people because Why You are projecting a lot of your father, your mother, right because you are projecting a lot of the people who raised you So you are very lacking, you are very much in the projection of what What's wrong , so if you're rejecting a father or mother who was very young and who demanded a lot from you, sometimes you say no, I don't want that. Then you start to be attracted to people who are more insecure or people who are sometimes even a little more withdrawn. shy Why do you say this person won't be aggressive with me this person won't give me any problems but then you start to see that the shy the introvert the introvert or the insecure person often doesn't give you anything either because it's not about attracting yourself over personality because personality is a specific charm that the person will have love is about delivery and receptivity people passion is about charm about personality When you become more mature you begin to understand that there are people who are very charming than a person more in energy like this or not Wow, a very self-confident, very secure person has a certain charm but let's see if this guy and if this girl has dedication, that's another thing, a more slender person or a more withdrawn person like I started here talking about could be very attractive to you, but let's see if this guy and this girl will deliver, the most immature person will be attracted to Charm And then, take a drink there Tasca there and then you say oh my God oh my God but I liked one person this person doesn't even know is a very insecure person is And then I became more secure, right Why?

Because I'm projecting I'm thinking that the insecure person will be calm and then the insecure Bárbara insecure put a pair of horns on me or I don't know what There I got ghosted and then you got really pissed off because it's not about personality, personality is out, people are out, character is something else, so you're falling in love, you're connecting with people because you think it's beautiful that the person is very Win, you think it's beautiful that the person is very Young or Win or Young, there has to be an equivalent exchange, the same as what you give is the same as what you receive, it's not like that at work, it's not like that at work, well, you hired someone, you made a contract at contract says deliver this this and this pay this this that is a fair exchange an equivalent exchange You close it if you don't think it's a fair equivalent You don't close it if you start working with the person the person doesn't deliver you close the contract ready that's how we do it But there's a lot of groselia on our wonderful internet saying what Young people are very this people are very that then Bárbara didn't work out because I was very in he was very Young bullshit bullshit has nothing to to do with this is not character character people Win pay attention to this Win he is reactive But he is also very loving so he is there to receive, right What energy do you have to put in but he gives a lot of love a lot of affection a lot of affection you have to have delivery the delivery can be more affective can be more emotional, sentimental and subjective But she is there and she also receives and Young you have a certain way of delivering sometimes he will position himself more sometimes he will come up with more plans at times Sometimes he will be a good problem solver, he will be a more practical person, but there is delivery and he also needs to receive, so there is none of that, but when we are falling in love with people who don't have delivery, it's because we are conditioned to neither look at what the person is delivering just look if the person has Charisma Charisma understands and Charisma and charisma a lot of shameless people have It's actually what they have most because Because the person who says I'm not going to give anything of myself away but I know that I I have a beautiful pair of eyes but I know that I have a beautiful voice but I know that I present myself as very cute very cute or I know that I present myself as a very powerful person and that will magnetize that is why I say I will do t-shirts heem There will come a time when I will make t-shirts we are reaching 400,000 followers Maybe it's time to make t-shirts for the programs and mugs and sell them in the shop here below the videos but what I say that I will make t-shirts are things I talk about a lot here in this channel and one of them is you think that power is seduction and manipulation that's why you're taking it there because if you believe that power is manipulating and seducing you are easily seduced and manipulated because that's what you believe, it's not about that, right? That 's not what a true connection with someone is about, it's not passion, it's love, but in passion you don't see the surrender in love, there has to be surrender because otherwise it's not love, there has to be an exchange, there has to be surrender, it has to be good for both parties, right? So you start to notice that you're getting attached to people because of personality characteristics, it's the same thing, I also give this example a lot, here the person goes to take some classes at college and they do poorly because they don't like the way the teacher is, wow my dear But you're sabotaging yourself, to hell with the teacher's manners Sometimes there are teachers who have a Oh but I don't like this teacher's voice wow There are a lot of people who write this here too Barbara I started watching your videos I found you very boring I I know why I'm ugly but I'm beautiful like everyone else, right?

But the person only saw the ugliness. I found you very annoying, unbearable, Barbara, but I gave it one more chance, I gave it one more chance. Wow, it transformed my life.

I say, that's good, why?