How to know your worth and learn to trust yourself

hi guys welcome back to my channel for another video if you are returning I am back with another one today we're going to be discussing the topic of knowing your worth overcoming self-doubt and learning to trust yourself so let's get into it so I've always been somebody who's placed myself on a little bit of a pedestal uh for most of my life found that for a lot of people it's actually quite an intimidating quality if you carry yourself that way it naturally just makes you more of an intimidating person um they might say things like

oh she's too much who is she think she is she's doing too much but the belief that I always had that I wasn't even aware of and the reason I actually carried myself this way to begin with was that belief of like why should I doubt myself why should I doubt myself if I'm alive I'm worthy just because I'm breathing just because I'm alive why shouldn't I be confident and take up space even if it makes somebody else feel uncomfortable I feel like there's this tendency to go throughout our whole lives not wanting to take

up space and especially not wanting to make another person feel uncomfortable it's like we try to earn something or perform for others because if they see us as amazing then we must be great we must be uh worthy of all good things or deserving of all good things I tried not to take up space because I was afraid of making someone else feel uncomfortable throughout my whole life I noticed this was a very uh big pattern is like I would always try to make myself uh smaller if it meant that someone else would feel more

comfortable about them themselves one day it struck me and I thought to myself what about my comfort I'm spending so much time worrying about whether or not this other person feels comfortable but I'm never thinking about what I have to do to meet my own needs alwayss compromising my own boundaries just so that they can feel all right people often think that it's the most selfless act if you try and make other people feel more comfortable than you do first let me tell you why in most instances that's actually the exact opposite that's probably the

most selfish thing that you can do because of resentment you keep prioritizing everybody else you're going to build resentment and who do you think has to hear about it when you feel angry and you feel upset you're going to take it out on those very people those very people have to face the consequen of you not being the absolute best version of yourself when you don't at least try to become the better version of yourself the people around you will suffer and the opposite is true as well when you do work hard on yourself every

single day everybody around you reaps the rewards as well so it's like almost as if you're taking everybody else with you the day I realized my worth was when I got to know my truest depths the depths of myself that I was suppressing because of my fear of being seen I realized that my worth lied in more than what just other people thought of me when they looked at me I used to be the type of person when somebody would take one look at me and decide that they didn't like me I would take it

so personally and I would feel so upset by it CU to me I thought it was always really unfair because I was like you don't even know me but then I started to learn slowly in my life that whatever is outside of you no matter how hard you try and perform and jump through hoops for other people and whatever it is that you try to do you put on a whole act for them it will 100 and th% never be enough because you are competing for something that there's no finish line for my love I

realized over time that even if I lose everyone else it's fall far worse to lose myself what happens when you start living for other people is that you you also start living in severe fear that fear is based on your inability to actually be yourself and for me a happy life is an authentic life and you cannot tell me otherwise only way to live a truly happy life is to be authentic to be yourself regardless of the price that you might have to pay it's a bigger price to pay when you're being someone that you're

not because you will attract things at the same frequency of the person that you're not so let's say you're playing a character you will only attract things at the same frequency of that character you will not be attracting who you truly are as a person because if you're not showing up that way in the world there's nothing to show for your efforts there's nothing to show for who you really are who you are when you're alone even if you claim that as your authentic self means nothing because when you step out into the world it

it's the energy it's the vibrations whatever you vibrate that's what matters most that's what you're going to attract I don't believe that playing characters or caring what other people think has ever been the way or the road map to a a happy life I just I don't think it ever has been and I don't think it ever will be let's talk about learning to trust yourself this was a big one for me it's a huge lesson that I'm learning right now I had uh very deep abandonment moons when it came down to relationships and friendships

even but it wasn't really about the fact that I was afraid that of somebody else abandoning me it was more so I was always scared of me abandoning myself I broke my own trust time and time again so building back that trust has taken so much time and the way I did this was by not voicing my concerns not voicing my needs not setting boundaries not prioritizing what I actually needed or wanted because I didn't want to burden anybody else but if you play this role if you play the role of the nice girlr you

will have to pay the price for that and it is a big price to pay yes maybe you won't be seen as a threat uh because for a long time that's why I wanted to avoid it taking up so much space was because I didn't want to feel I seem like a threat especially to other women I would really want to dim down my light it's going to do a lot more damage than you think because you'll soon realize that it's better to not be liked than to keep compromising your own needs and wants because

I didn't want to be an inconvenience to anybody else it made me run away from emotional connection to anybody I had adopted the belief that if I do get too close to somebody then eventually inevitably I will abandon myself and that it's only when I'm alone that I can find that feeling of peace or that feeling of Solace somehow which that isn't real Peace by the way completely isolating yourself from everybody that loves you and everybody that cares about you and believing that oh I'm just going to level up in my silence and whatever it's

not real peace because remember you're leveling up in order to become a better version for them too and for yourself but especially even for them so you can Inspire something in them you can maybe plant a seed and this way I would avoid the feeling in my heart that I couldn't trust myself if I was away from people it meant that I had more trust in myself and I always wondered why that was the thing that's really allowed me to turn this around was honoring my relationships but most of all honoring the relationship I have

with myself and realizing that whatever happens in here is always going to be reflected outward in my relationships even when I'm meeting people whether it's at work or whether it's in my day-to-day life I always see the person as a mirror because I'm like what is this person here to teach me and of course sometimes you get caught in daily life that it's hard to identify what this person is trying to teach you it's hard in general to be conscious sometimes because there's so much happening and there's so much noise right so it's very very

difficult but I try my best to set that intention every single morning or at least every single day because I realize if I meet someone really great that mirrors something inside me and if I meet someone that triggers something inside me that's also a mirror for me too they are mirroring something that I haven't dealt with yet Within Myself and I think when you see things like that life becomes pretty enjoyable because you start to acknowledge that you and other people are one and the same I wish I could tell you exactly when you'll arrive

to a place of Solace uh when it comes to how you value yourself but I can't I cannot tell you when that day will come because the way to know your worth is to experience life and to get strict about what you tolerate the experiences will come whether you value yourself or not it doesn't matter how they come you will have to live life you will have to go through adversity but what makes or breaks the next era of your life is how you handled this one I didn't want to have another chapter or another

phase or another era of my life where I wasn't comfortable in my skin anymore because when you deny your needs long enough your soul sits very uncomfortably in your body so to doubt yourself is to disrespect yourself this past few weeks I took a break for myself and I truly felt like I was struggling with imposture syndrome because it felt like no matter what I did it I just wasn't doing enough I took some time to find a way to approach things in a different way cuz maybe I was thinking to myself maybe the way

I'm doing things right now is not actually working and you know what the thought that got me out of it actually was realizing that I wasn't excited about hitting 5K I feel grateful for 5K but I wasn't excited about hitting 5K on my YouTube channel and I was wondering to myself why that was but then I remembered when I was praying for 350 subscribers and that really humbled me that thought that's when I realized knowing your worth is having gratitude celebrating small wins but not being taken back like entirely taken back when something good happens

to you because why shouldn't good things happen to you you deserve it so you're not an imposter my love despite what you might believe about yourself and the thing is you already know what's coming life is just catching up to you because it's only a matter of time you just have to keep it pushing and it will happen for you thank you guys so much for watching today's video and I will see you guys in the next one