25 Storytelling Secrets I Wish I Knew In My 20s

by now I've spent $27,000 on storytelling courses and I learned 25 lessons that made really the entire investment worth it today I'm going to share all of them lesson number one imagine you watching this nature documentary and the scene starts with this camera shot all the way from the helicopter like you see the forest below you see the ocean stretching it's beautiful but after a while you're like dude like give me some action want to see the line approaching as prey your stories they're no different yes you can start with that overview with that helicopter

shot but then you want to zoom in lesson number one zoom into the moment don't just say I faced a difficult challenge well that's boring the better way is to zoom into the moment so you describe the manager pacing around the room maybe the intern spilling coffee or maybe that handshake that turns everything around give your audience something to see hear and feel lesson number two next is a technique that requires I would say minimal change but has just a huge pay off instead of saying I wanted to run a marathon that's pretty boring right

say the marathon was in 7 days and I'd never run more than 10 km in my life lesson number two add a ticking clock now time pressure makes everything feel much more intense when you you tell your audience that there's way too little time to complete this massive task they'll feel the tension and they'll be much more engaged lesson number three don't start your story like this uh let me tell you a story okay don't do that no don't say the SW word the SW word is story some people hear the word story and it

triggers this negative expectation they think like here we go again have do we have time for this 15minute fairy tale instead of saying the word story say experience event example or case let me give you an example two weeks ago I had a very interesting experience and then you launch into your story lesson number four the best stories are emotional and the easiest way to make your story more emotional is to share what you were thinking in that moment now you have thousands and thousands of thoughts every single day hopes dreams fears crazy thoughts now

share some of those thoughts in that crucial moment of the story lesson number four think out loud so instead of saying I was worried about the presentation share the thoughts maybe those were like I thought how am I going to turn this around my manager already thinks that I'm useless when you share those thoughts give us the raw unfiltered thoughts not this super polish or super professional version when you share what was going on through your mind your story will instantly feel much deeper much more relatable lesson number five imagine you walked across this room

in front of a bunch of people with an empty glass nothing special right but now imagine you do that same walk but this time with a full glass in your hand and then also someone tells you if you spill just one drop your entire family will die now you're like you walk across this room every single person in the room just watches every single step you take holding their breath that is lesson number five Raise the stakes tell your audience what's on the line what happens if you win what happens if you lose what will

be the impact on your life but also on the life of your loved ones raise the stakes lesson number six way too many storytellers share those unnecessary details they're like um I was 16 years old I had braces I had messy hair and I was wearing this band shirt like cool who cares that's not memorable the better way is to reveal some personality Quirk something that is a little bit unique about you as a character lesson number six show personality quirks you can say for example I was the type of person who made a pros

and cons list even before choosing breakfast quirks like that they bring your a character to life and they help your audience see you in this more unique more memorable way lesson number seven stories aren't just about impressing people but they're about connecting with your audience the easiest way to build trust is to share something that you struggled with vulnerability builds trust so instead of pretending to have it all together share maybe the messy the not so good part the imperfections vulnerability shows that you're human and that's at the end what makes people trust you lesson

number eight I've seen it so many times a story average at best but then suddenly turning into this incredible story just because of one thing a big surprise something totally unexpected a Twist that no one saw coming lesson number eight surprise your audience now that surprise can be anything unexpected an unexpected event a weird reaction or maybe even unusual decision anything that your listeners didn't see coming lesson number nine this is the technique that I use the most in my stories now imagine if I shared a story like that um well in that moment my

boss informed me that he wasn't impressed with my presentation and that I should prepare more that's super boring right now the better way is to share the exact words of that moment to bring the story to life lesson number nine share the dialogue back to that same example in that moment my boss walked up to me and said Phillip what the hell was that you were all over the place did you even look at the slides before now we're talking now it's much juicier right lesson number 10 this is something that took a while for

me to learn but something that has had a massive impact on my storytelling skills before I used to think that I would have to tell this full story anytime like with a start with a middle and an end now when you starting off that full story can feel incredibly awkward like so overwhelming but now years later I realized that you actually don't need to tell the full story you can just tell Snippets of that lesson number 10 tell micro stories so instead of sharing the full story share maybe a single pivotal moment from that story

maybe it's this moment of realization maybe it's this one conversation that stood out or maybe this one meaningful thing that touched your heart example right then he looked me in the eye and said you have no idea what this means to me those micro stories will feel much more authentic and they'll help you get much more comfortable using stories in your day to-day lesson number 11 stories often don't land because the story always feel too polished too rehearsed not as if the Storyteller was really connecting to the story now to fix that visualize the scene

unfolding in front of your eyes as you speak lesson number 11 relive the moment when you tell that story imagine you're back in that moment and then just describe it as if it was unfolding in front of your eyes so where are you what are you seeing what are you thinking what are you hearing when you describe what you see and feel in real time the story will feel more emotional more Vivid and much more engaging lesson number 12 this is actually something that I still struggle with today often when I tell a story I

move into this performance mode I'm like it was October 2022 I was in my apartment in Amsterdam sometimes when I share a story my voice changes and suddenly I sound more like this motivational speaker or this fairy tale uncle lesson number 12 drop the storytelling voice now tell your story in the same way you shared with a close friend a family member or even your therapist tell your story as conversational as possible lesson number 13 you've probably heard by now thousands and thousands of stories but pray you forgot 99% of them now why is that

because they were missing one crucial element that sound like I was that type of person before I did this crazy stuff and I was the same person after her no they don't have any element of change lesson number 13 show the change show us who you were before what you did but how it changed you what was the transformation if for example you were completely out of shape now you're running a marathon if you were terrified of public speaking now you love being on stage show the transformation lesson number 14 have you ever watched a

movie where everything just went perfectly of course not it would be a movie yet this is somehow how we often tell our stories we're like well we launched the product and everything went perfectly lesson number 14 conflict is King bring in some sort of conflict a difficult decision an emotional challenge a physical challenge any type of conflict even if your conflict is maybe opening that stubborn bottle of ketchup bring some sort of conflict without conflict it's not a story lesson number 15 every great story has this one single moment where everything shifts it's maybe this

decision realization or any sort of breakthrough a 5c moment that changes everything lesson number 15 find the turning point for example this can be maybe the second that you decided to leave your toxic job or maybe that moment when your partner said let's do this every great story should have this 5c moment that changes everything that's really that's the heartbeat of your story that's where everything else builds up to just to that final moment lesson number 16 people are usually pretty rigid when it comes to their stories they're like I timed it and it takes

exactly 2 minutes 35 seconds I need that time to tell the full story but hey this is not how life works sometimes you have 30 seconds sometimes you get five minutes to tell your story the best story tells know how to adjust their stories lesson number 16 scale your stories practice telling a three-minute version a 90-second version a 30-second version this helps you know what are the essentials what can you eliminate but most importantly it helps you to adapt the story to any setting or audience lesson number 17 one of the biggest mistakes people do

when telling stories is to give too much context they're like it was a sunny Tuesday afternoon the birds were chirping and the air smelled a little bit like lavender dude seriously like no one cares unless those details are crucial later skip them lesson number 17 jump into action the better way is to make your character do something biking shouting talking any sort of action example it's October 2024 I'm standing in front of that conference room taking a deep breath when you share the action your audience can imagine the scene unfolding in front of their eyes

lesson number 18 when I started on my storytelling journey I thought that great stories they have to be about these huge events like the near-death experience or this spiritual awakening but here's the problem those stories should they can be entertaining but they're not relatable lesson number 18 focus on small relatable moments so instead of sharing about those gigantic life stories share those tiny stories maybe a story about you missing the Bus learning something small or just having this moment of realization those are the moments that build that connection lesson number 19 the best storytellers they

aren't necessarily the ones with the best stories but the best storytellers are the ones with the most stories now think about it if you have let's say only three stories well there won't be that many options where you can tell them imagine you had 30 50 or even a 100 stories well then you will always have exactly the right story for the right moment so lesson number 19 start a story Bank a story bank is this central place where you safe and organize your stories so what I usually save even there is the the title

The Lesson the summary and maybe the theme I'll actually include my template in the description below so that you don't have to start from scratch but by saving your stories you'll never run out of stories again in your life lesson number 20 there is one exercise that has helped me more than any other exercise to become a better Storyteller but also a better speaker now that is to improvise stories now what I do still almost on a daily basis I go online go on this random topic generator get a random topic and then start improvising

that story I speak for like one to two minutes I try to use the structure that I know and I try to make it as interesting as visual as possible but when you're starting off don't overthink it just start improvising improvisation is this powerful tool that will help your mind to think much more quickly on the spot but also helps to become a much more confident Storyteller lesson number 21 if you say for example I was nervous well your audience they hear those words but they cannot see that emotion they cannot feel the emotion behind

those words but if you say instead that moment my hands were shaking my throat just felt so dry and my heart was just pounding like a drum well when you share that then your audience can really see and feel the the emotion so lesson number 21 show don't tell describe what the emotion looks like how does your body how does your face change when going through that emotion the more your audience can see that the more they will connect to your story lesson number 22 by now you probably have hundreds and hundreds of untold stories

stories that you just haven't noticed yet now the easiest way to find them is to look for the highs and the lows from a specific period in your life so pick a time like let's say the first year in your job or maybe the last year in your relationship and then ask yourself H what were the highs and the lows during that period now what were the moments that let's say I was particularly happy where was particularly excited or maybe sad or disappointed once you have that ask yourself what did I learn during that moment

and then if you like that lesson while craft a short story around that lesson it's such an easy way to have this pool of stories lesson number 23 now trying to memorize your story word for word can often make you feel a little bit stiff like a little bit fake the better way is to think of your story as a map right you know where you're starting off you know roughly where to stop along the way and you also know the Final Destination but the route how you get there well that one you're a little

bit more flexible you can adapt as needed lesson number 23 memorize the start the scenes and the finish so memorize your first few lines then you memorize the key scenes or moments where the story takes place and then lastly memorize the last lines of your story that will keep your delivery Pretty Natural and actually helps you recover when you get lost at one point in your story lesson number 24 you've probably told a few stories before but maybe you actually have no clue how you're actually Landing how you're actually coming across while telling the story

when I started for example telling my stories I often looked like this grumpy teenager who really hated life but back then I didn't know I only realized that once I actually saw a video of me speaking lesson number 24 record yourself yes I know recording yourself can be awkward at first but it helps you understand how you come across once you've watched yourself you will know what things things you can improve on lesson number 25 after watching yourself speak it's tempting to fix everything right your gestures your pauses your fillow words everything when we try

to focus on too many things you won't make any progress at all so lesson number 25 fix one thing at a time now focus on one area that you want to improve on now which area should you pick work on the one thing that distracts people the most from you your story for example if you use a few filler words throughout your story probably doesn't matter but if you use a filler word every single five seconds well it will probably become distracting so what I would say is focus on the thing that distracts the most

that's it those are 25 lessons I learned from all those courses but hey I'm mindful that we moved quite fast today um but hey I also recorded another video that actually goes much more into the details of each one of those lessons so go ahead and check it out now [Music]