(S)acred (E)nergy (X)change

hello okay okay yeah I'm recording a voice memo on my phone cuz you know I have a Blue Yeti microphone which is like those microphones that people use for like what's it called like podcast and [ __ ] but I don't know how to set the settings on that microphone every time I've used it for YouTube video in the past I just that [ __ ] don't sound right and the iPhone like voice messages always sound right so I'm just going to be holding my phone I'm burning some poos Santo and I have some incense

burning in the crib um so I'm feeling right I'm so grateful to be back I have returned um I'm not going to lie I didn't expect that many people to watch that last video but I mean the universe did what it had to do I think it just reached the people it needed to reach and I'm so grateful for the the way it was received I feel like it was received in the way that I was really authentically showing up and I'm so grateful for that thank you for holding space for me and yeah it's

been gloomy in Texas for the past a week I think I've seen the sun once in the past week I don't know where the [ __ ] the sun is at and I was going to film a video about us all being reflections of each other that's the video I was going to film this week but I want to film that outside when it's sunny because nature is a reflection of me and I just feel like being in that space in nature is where I need to be to film that video however I'm back I'm

here and today I want to talk about sex I don't feel like we talk about enough the effect that sex has on our bodies physical mental spiritual everything um and yeah I I thought I would talk about this today I'm going to be honest I don't have a script when I today or for the last video I'm just kind of talking off the Dome so I'm probably going to be jumping from idea to idea from subject to subject but the the core basis is going to be sex and I want to touch on things like

I made like a list of like things I want to touch on like body count double standards intentional sexual partners generational curses and yeah I guess I'm just going to start off talking about how I was first introduced to sex or like just like my first memories of like learning about sex and to be honest was growing up my parents didn't really teach me much about sex I feel like sex was not really talked about in the household it was kind of like a don't ask don't tell and even if you do ask you weren't

told that much I wasn't educated on sex at school I kind of was just told to be absent like school just taught me like you're going to have a period a menstral cycle and if you're going to have sex just don't have sex and that didn't help because at the end of the day we all have sex it's just part of our Primal needs as human beings and having my my education of sex which for I feel like a lot of us was rooted in watching porn is really sad um the fact that a lot

of our parents didn't take it to be their responsibility to teach us about sex but then again looking at at it from a different perspective holding empathy for my parents they probably just weren't educated about sex either and didn't understand the importance of sex but growing up and becoming my own adult my own person with my own beliefs and dismantling a lot of things that I was indoctrinated growing up I have come to a pretty clear consensus around what I think about sex and my thoughts towards it and how I'm going to maneuver moving forward

in my life with my sexual experiences so I hope this video just educates more than anything and kind of I'm just going to be sharing my perspective on things it doesn't mean that my perspective is right it just means that it's my perspective and you can take what resonates and leave what doesn't I lost my virginity when I was 18 years old and at the time I didn't really like I was just 18 and I was just sick of hearing about sex all the time in songs in media in music in TV shows and I

was just like what is the hype about like what what is it and you know one thing led to another I had linked up with this guy that I had never met before and I didn't really intend to have sex with him but we had sex and it was terrible no offense to him he probably has no offense to him you know I also that was my first time having sex and it was just not good it wasn't the hype at all like it did not meet my like it didn't meet the standards that I

had about sex it wasn't really anything I I was like I I'm good I'm good off that like you know but I also had sex very casually with a person I had just met which I I don't know I think I was just trying to get it over with and I don't shame myself or get guilt I don't shame or guilt myself for any past experiences that I've had because everything is meant for my growth if I allow it to be but you know after that experience a couple months later I end up you know

having this guy friend we eventually start dating he was my first boyfriend and we have sex and that was such a different experience than that first guy because I was actually in partnership with somebody I was dating somebody we had started off as friends and that was I think looking back at my sexual experiences that I've had with people which to be completely transparent I don't know if I want to put this in there but body count is something I'm going to be talking about in this video and right now I have less than 10

bodies I have had sex with less than 10 people and I'm only sharing this because I know girls are going to be watching this specifically younger girls I'm currently 22 I lost my Virgin you I was 18 so in those four years I have experienced the people that I have it's less than 10 I'm not going to put my number out there that's just that gives you a consensus like okay out of the amount of people I've had sex with 34s of them so 75% have been Casual Encounters of one night stands literally one night

stands of people that I had sex with of those individuals that I had sex with and I never spoke to them again or like we never had sex again so just me trying to feed my bodily My Flesh desires my my you know Primal needs trying to trying to just get it over with and I don't have honestly sometimes I I sit with like having a little bit of regret for some of those people because I'm just like why did I why did I let them have access to me in that way but I had

to learn from it like damn if I didn't go through that and understood like I don't feel good after doing this and I would have not come to the conclusion I have now of understanding that casual sex is not for me and everything is just a Learning lesson but also at the time I didn't love myself enough to understand that I should be more selective with the people that I was having sex with I was trying to feel a void maybe I was trying to feel an insecurity a lot of times casual sex is rooted

in that it's rooted in trying to feel emptiness if you feel lonely you meet somebody at a club you meet somebody outside they like you you have an attraction physically you have sex and really like just Roo it on physical attraction tells you everything you need to know about casual sex it's all physical it's all superficial it's not a substance it's not a a relationship that has a foundation to it it just has lust it's a lustful experience and lust is one of the lowest vibrations um that there is when it comes to having a

feeling love lusting is one of the lowest vibrations you can feel I literally posted a a chart on my Instagram story talking about this and I'll put it here it's from the book becoming Supernatural by Dr Joe despenser which I really recommend anybody to read that book it's a great book but yeah [Music] um in society we constantly hear in music and in media about sex specifically I I at least from my experience listening to music I hear a lot of male rappers and hip-hop artists speaking about having a lot of sex with a lot

of girls and it's specifically like men men talking about how they have [ __ ] a lot of women they don't call them woman but you know you know what I'm trying to say I honestly feel in my heart this like the pain that men put themselves through because I don't understand that double standard of a man being able to have a multitude of sexual partners and a woman must only have a little amount cuz it's a double standard it's like as soon as a woman has more than x amount of sexual partners she's a

hoe but a man can have an endless amount of sexual partners or bodies and he's not a hoe and I'm I just I don't understand that I don't I don't understand that double standard and I I hate when people use that [ __ ] key and the lock analogy that's a stupid ass analogy to me because at the end of the day we're both human and anybody that you decide to collect that sounds bad but you know anybody that you decide to sleep with is energy that is being transferred to you sex is sacred energy

exchange it's two bodies becoming one and no matter if you're a woman or a man having an an and participating in sex will come with the you know the thread of whoever you had sex with their energy is now combined with yours and unless you're doing the spiritual work to cleanse yourself of that if you're not aware you're going to be building up a lot of heaviness in that area in your sacral chakra and you know it can cause blockage to your sacral chakra like imagine having a lot of sexual partners unintentionally and I want

to like emphasize that because body count is a number it's a count yes whatever it's it's a number like let's say this person has six bodies okay this person has six bodies okay cool um but let's say all of those six bodies were casual encounters like not once did that person have an actual intentional relationship with the other person like they were all lustful that's in a way like you being a hoe even though you don't have a lot of bodies you were not intentional with the people you decided to interact with sexually and that's

what I want to that's the real issue is we're forgetting what love really is all about and how sex is just another form of showing your love to somebody like it's it's loving somebody so much you want to show them pleasure physically and to be honest I have found that starting a foundation with being friends with somebody first before even wanting to have sex with them like like we live in such a weird Society where like you go out on a date with a stranger with intentions to dating them before even knowing them as a

friend that's so weird that's so weird because then you walk into this date with this person and you already kind of have a mask on in a way because you have to maneuver around this date for your potential romantic partner instead of just going out with somebody as a potential friend like meeting each other human to human first and just understanding that we're first going to become friends there's first going to be a platonic relationship is a great way to set a foundation up to eventually Sprout into a relationship and that doesn't mean that you

should be walking in somebody somebody's life with the intention to be romantic but then face fronting it as friendship because that can become very manipulative but you know giving it time good things take time there's no need to run Rush having sex there's no need to rush for a sexual partner and I'm honestly I'm telling myself these things because I crave intimacy and I know intimacy is not always sex it doesn't have to be always sex but any form of intimacy that's romantic I really crave that I've literally been Cate for8 months um I'm not

in a rush I know I'm going to eventually attract somebody that is doing the work and all I really have to do is keep doing the work because just naturally you're going to start to be a magnet for like-minded beings that understand the concepts that you understand but if you're not changing the way that you view things nothing's going to change um everything's going to be the same you're going to keep falling back into the old patterns of having those casual sex encounters and I'm really not making this video to shame anybody or myself for

having casual sex in the past I feel like it's something that most of us can say we've encountered or had experienced that at least once but it's kind of shedding light on the fact that we've been programmed and indoctrinated by I feel like music specifically and certain TV shows media but music specifically man like rap really just puts sex as such a Forefront and makes it seem like such a meaningless Act of just conquering woman and it's really sad to see men in our society living this way and treating woman this way I see it

all the time I've experienced it firsthand like I have literally been disrespected firsthand by men that just see me as an object and all of us have like all women have and honestly like men need to start healing for real because I at least from my perspective looking into like the the male population and just like men in general I see that they have this like and and I mean correct me if I'm wrong but I've had conversations with my guy friends talking about this but it seems like they have this internalized monologue all the

time based on their own competition with one another like men don't love each other enough and I'm not talking about sexually I'm not talking about being you know gay I'm talking about y'all don't love each other enough as brothers as as companions as somebody that you can have a shoulder to cry on y'all compete way too much with each other it's almost like you compete based on how much money you have how many girls you [ __ ] who you [ __ ] who you know you're it's like constant it's like a constant Loop of

competition and it's very clear and it's sad because y'all really just need love y'all need to be loving on each other more and being a brother for each other and allowing each other to hold space to be vulnerable y'all need to start feeling your emotions allow yourself to cry in front of one another like that takes a lot of Courage especially in a society that tells men that they cannot feel any emotions or show any signs of emotions because that's going to make you weak and that is rooted in not just indoctrination from society but

generational cises yeah generational curses are really interesting growing up I really saw love like Forefront through my parents' relationship and I'm not trying to dodge them I love my parents deeply um and I have healed a lot of things regarding my parents and I could do a whole video talking about that um so yeah not trying to do Dodge the relationship they had but it was very conditional it was very conditional it was very much rooted in I do this so you do this I do this so then you do this like as long as

I get this done you should be getting this done and that's conditional love it's like if you don't if I don't pay the bills you're not going to wash the dishes if you don't wash the dishes I'm not going to pay the bills it's like they you know what I mean it's conditional love it's like okay if I don't watch the dishes this day then you're not going to pay the bills like what's that about I I'm good off conditional love I've learned that from just seeing my parents' relationship and of course they had their

High moments but there was a lot of things that they could have worked on to make the relationship a better one and just conditional love is not allowing somebody to show up as they authentically are loving somebody unconditionally is one of the most powerful ways like that's that's that's what we all want we want unconditional love and it exists and it takes a lot of self-work because in order to Unconditionally Love another person you have to Unconditionally Love Yourself and you have to you know fight your demon you have to work with your Shadow Self

you have to look at the darkest parts of yourself and the darkest parts that you went through in this life and do the work and heal from it and understand how those dark parts are a part of you but you also have a light side like you have a we all have a dark and a light side everything in this life has a positive and a negative pull to it unconditionally loving yourself will then allow you to Unconditionally Love other people which is what we all really want and desire is for somebody to love us

despite our scars and our wounds and our imperfections so yeah doing the work to break generational curses because if you don't go back and do the work and look at for example your parents' relationships maybe you grew up in a you know single family home or single parent home that can cause a lot of trauma you know trauma if you don't go back and understand what that might have cost you to now attract as an adult because I see it so often it's crazy if you don't break those generational curses you're going to start to

attract relationships that mirror your parents' relationship going back to how sex is an energy exchange I have found this good um analogy to give you a visual representation of two energies kind of combining together because a lot of people say like oh I feel fine after having casual sex I used to say that all the time when your sacral chakra is blocked it can just affect so many ways so your that's your creativity chakra some guy's like dumping water off of like the [ __ ] fourth story of that building he crazy anyways um what

was I saying if if you have a if you have a block sacral chakra it can affect your creativity because that's our portal of creation like our the womb being the woman's area and then you know a men's genitalia that holds the seed but the womb holds the portal like that's where the a baby comes out that's your your your area of creation that's the area in which we come as one in hetal relationships you know but same thing with with having like gay relationships or same samex relationship like it's still going to be an

energy exchange that's still your portal of creation that's still your area of creation and when it's blocked it can affect your creativity and we are all creators we are all creations so having a blocked sacral chakra can affect you creativity it can affect you creatively like you may be blocked creatively you might have noticed that times where you had a casual sex encounter you don't participate or show up at your creative activities as much as you used to I know that when I experience celibate um moments of my life where I I'm not having sex

for a very long time I feel so creative like I release all of that energy creatively onto my Creations like drawing painting making videos anything that you can just create anything that that can come from nothing okay so yeah back to the analogy so just imagine I have a cup of water and then I have a cup of coke and I blend them both together in in a bowl I no longer have water or or Coke cuz the coke has been diluted and the water has been contaminated and that is basically what happens during sex

like two bodies are becoming one and you're now blending in your energy with this other person's energy and if you're not intentional and if you don't have good discernment with who you're being sexually partners with I mean that person could carry so much energy within them because for example if they're not being responsible about who they're having sex with and they have had casual sex for years and they're carrying all these bodies on them just imagine like how much blockage there is in their area um I mean I like to describe it as like you

know your area should be glowing with a bright orange color when when looking at chakras like imagine it just glowing a bright orange that means it's clear it's open when it's blocked it's almost like this like brown gray very like muddy color it's like you know it it's just not it does it's not right and then putting that in in you and blending in with your energy is just going to [ __ ] you up up I'm so picky now with not even who I just have sex with but who I allow to have access

to me period like especially access to me trying to come to me in a romantic sense like the men that consistently pursue me I really don't pay much mind to and I don't really do so in any egotistical way it's not that I feel like they're available to me at any time I just know what I want and I know how I want to attract people and I can my intuition is very clear enough to let me know if somebody is worth my time or not I don't even have to meet somebody in real life

like I was talking to this boy that's very attractive for about I think a week um we were going back and forth and texting each other and like FaceTiming or whatever and I have nothing against them I just my intuition was just like I just don't think that he is doing the spiritual work that I'm doing and I don't think that that he is just at the same you know level as far as Evolution as me and I had to take the decision to just like tell him like Hey we could just be friends like

that's cool and I promise you like it'd be hard to do that because somebody could be really attractive and I have to friends on them because I just don't see it being a relationship of substance and if I'm not being challenged intellectually and if you're not brain [ __ ] me first like that's the thing that's what I want like you need to brain [ __ ] me before you can physically [ __ ] me I need you to you know what I mean like stimulate my mind that [ __ ] that [ __ ]

really turns me on like I don't know what it is about somebody just somebody's mind is so attractive to me like holy [ __ ] like wow wow like brain [ __ ] me first and once you do that then potentially like you're going to have way much more of a of a chance to have beautiful you know meaningful spiritual ass sex with me that's how I feel about anybody that's going to come to my life and that in those terms but sex is such a wonderful thing and I I'm sending a lot of love

to my younger self because growing up I felt so ashamed and guilty for being a sexual being for things like masturbation for things like just having my bodily desires of wanting to feel pleasure and a lot of that was indoctrination through growing up in a in a Catholic household where religion was very it wasn't even very like placed on me but you know religion says to not have sex or to not masturbate and that you're sinful and I would feel ashamed for a lot of the things I did and growing up it took me you

know breaking down those indoctrinations and then understanding that I don't believe what I've been taught growing up understanding that I don't have to believe what I've been taught growing up and I can create my own set of truths and you can too like what I'm saying in this video and what I've talked about is not truth it's my my truth and I want to make that very clear like you don't I'm not expecting anybody to agree with what I talked about this is just what I currently where my head is at in regards to sex

that can change I'm a very open-minded person open-minded enough to change my the way that I think and change my belief surrounding any topic but right now this is how I feel about sex and I feel it's a very sacred act and I want to Value it and and really hold it to very very high importance because sex is important to me and I I want to treat it as such I don't want to treat it as just an act that I have to just you know blow off steam or feel good I don't want

the instant gratification of just having sex casually I want delayed gratification I want to be able to attract somebody become a beautiful friend with them and then eventually like just in ways that you wouldn't even imagine like it starts to become romantic and that probably wasn't even my intention like my intention is just to attract beautiful intimacy and if that grows into me having sex with somebody then let it but there is nothing more powerful than intentional sex intentional Partnerships um because you're going to feel so good you're going to feel so connected um um

you're going to feel so proud of yourself for waiting like good things take time and I hope that everybody gets to experience what love making truly is and how to have egoless sex like sex with no ego looking at another person and just accepting them for who they are because sex is sacred I mean you're literally just becoming bare in front of somebody else and you shouldn't have to feel like you have to make yourself small you shouldn't feel insecure to show who you really are or what you really look like you shouldn't be insecure

to be human and if somebody's making you feel that way then they're probably not meant for you so the more you do the internal work like I said The more you start to really Unconditionally Love Yourself the more you're going to attract people that Unconditionally Love themselves all right I have been talking for a really long time I'm going to just end this here I don't know how long this video is going to be I just know that I wanted to talk about the the subjects I did and this isn't going to be my only

video talking about sex I feel like sex is a very expansive and vast topic and there's so many layers to talking about it but I'm glad I did because it's a very taboo topic not a lot of people talk about sex or make it a Forefront because it can be kind of controversial and so many people have different views of it but just know that you're welcome here it's a safe space I I'm not here to tell you that I'm right and I'm open-minded enough to change my perspective on some of the topics I talked

about if you don't agree with me I just like this YouTube channel is really just going to be a way for us to have a conversation with one another and talk about topics that aren't talked about often enough and I welcome any disagre or people that might have not agreed with something I said like I would love to continue the conversation in the comments and tell me if you resonated with anything that I talked about and yeah um I think I'm going to just going to call it the end of the video wow I'm grateful

I'm feeling really grateful it is currently 6:30 p.m. which means I can finally eat my first meal after fasting for my 18 hours I'm not going to lie fasting in the days that I do it I haven't been doing it every day I'm not going to lie like some days I'll eat a little earlier than 6:30 but today I did Fast and it just my gratitude towards the food that's in front of me when I fast just be crazy I be talking about fasting at the end of last video and this video but I'll probably

anyways I have a lot of things coming up for this channel I'm going to really nurture this YouTube channel like my baby because I just see that it attracts the right people people and I wanted to continue to do so like I feel good about I feel good about YouTube I feel good about it um thank you for spending some time out of your day to be with me and to listen to me I hope you have a great rest of your day or night I'm sending you so much love and I will talk to

you in my next video m