where we look at the Timeless knowledge of stoicism and how it applies to our lives today this week we're going to talk about something that is both important and uncomfortable how to tell if someone is bad many times people use the word evil in a broad way but it actually refers to a specific type of bad behavior choosing to hurt trick or control others for your own benefit people from all walk of Life come into our lives every day most of them mean well even if they make mistakes along the way on the other hand
there are some people who really are bad these people can do terrible things to our physical mental and even emotional health they aren't just acting badly because they're having a bad day or because they don't understand they really want to hurt you we can avoid a lot of pain and suffering if we notice these traits early on Socrates steps in at this point as the cardinal virtues the stoics thought that wisdom Justice courage and moderation were very important they told us that we should always try to act in a way that is in line with
these virtues no matter what is going on around us that being said they knew that not everyone would share these beliefs some people choose to act in ways that are the exact opposite of these ideals following the teachings of stoicism we will look at five signs that you are working with a bad person in today's video These warning signs aren't just random they come from a deep understanding of how people work which stoic thinkers like senica epicus and Marcus Aurelius talked about we can better keep ourselves and the people we care about from falling for
bad forces if we know these signs first we'll talk about how important it is to spot lies people who are bad at what they do often lie and trick others to control them the stoics said that we shouldn't be fooled by how things look and that we should look deeper to see what someone really wants the next thing we'll talk about is how cruelty shows up in Deeds that's because evil people often get pleasure from other people's pain which goes against stoic ideals of empathy and compassion being aware of this can help us avoid being
hurt by their cruel actions we'll also talk about how not being responsible is a clear sign of evil people who always put the blame on others for their actions are probably trying to avoid the results of their selfish actions the stoics stressed how important it is to be responsible for your actions and noticing when someone else isn't can be a very important warning sign we'll also talk about how how a pattern of harm that doesn't go away whether it's physical mental or emotional is a strong sign that you're dealing with someone who is truly bad
stoics taught us to be wary of people who hurt other people's rights and well-being over and over again lastly we'll talk about how the stoic idea of not caring about evil can help us separate ourselves from bad people and keep ourselves safe we can handle these tough situations with strength and knowledge if we keep our inner peace and focus on what we can control come with us as we look into these five signs by learning about them you can tell who is trying to hurt you and stay away from them which will help you live
a life that is in line with stoic ideals number one the urge to control throughout our lives there are times when we strongly want to take charge of events people and even our feelings people often feel the need to control because they want to feel safe sure and sure of what will happen however stoic philosophy tells us that trying to control things that are out of our control is not only pointless but it can also cause us to suffer and be frustrated for no reason we will look at the idea of the urge to control
through the lens of stoicism in this film we'll talk about why we feel this way what stoic thinkers like Marcus aelius and epicus said about it and how we can use stoic ideas to better handle our need to be in charge how to understand the need to control control people naturally want to stay in charge because they want to avoid pain find pleasure and feel safe in a world that is always changing this comes from our need to stay safe and secure during times of prehistoric times there are two types of power control and impact
it's important to know the difference between the two we can change some things that happen but real control isn't always possible especially when other people's Acts or unplanned events are involved stoic two ways of being in charge what do we really have control over according to stoicism the only things we can really control are our own thoughts deeds and attitudes these are things inside of us that we can control and manage the things we can't change are we can't change outside factors other people's Acts or the results of our efforts accepting this difference is very
important for lowering stress and anger the false sense of control expectations can be dangerous because they make us think we can control things that we can't this makes us us more likely to be let down this makes people feel stressed anxious and like they failed when things don't go as planned letting go of the illusion when we know what we can and can't control we can let go of unrealistic hopes and focus on what really matters how we react to whatever happens the Epic tetus on power teachings from the enidan epicus of famous stoic thinker
said that we should focus on what we can control he taught us that we can only control our thoughts feelings and behaviors but not anything else use mindfulness and self-awareness can help us train our minds to focus on what's going on inside us instead of worrying about what's going on outside US Marcus Aurelius on being agreeable meditations on control in his meditations Marcus aelius often thought about how pointless it is to try to control things that are not ours to control he said that we should go with the flow of life and understand that many
things are out of our control the idea of amorfati which means love of Fate tells us to accept what happens as good and important even if it's not what we wanted the part of being separated Detachment from emotions being detached doesn't mean not caring about anything it means accepting life as it is without letting it affect you emotionally this helps us deal with life's problems in a more calm and logical way to practice Detachment we can regularly think about what we can control and what we can't this will help us develop a sense of Detachment
that keeps us calm and focused mindfulness and focusing on the present living in the present we want to be in charge because we are afraid of what might happen in the future or feel bad about what happened in the past stoicism tells us to pay attention to the present moment since that's the only time we can really change responses with care being mindful helps us deal with things in a clear and deliberate way instead of reacting out of the need to control everything exercises that you can use to deal with the urge to control writing
in a journal write down every day what happened what you tried to control and whether you were able to avoid or change something this helps you see things more clearly and reinforces the stoic dualistic view of power negative visualization to help you let go of results practice picturing the worst case scenario this stoic activity helps you get ready for anything that might happen and lowers your fear of losing control self-affirmation tell yourself over and over that you are in charge of your ideas actions and reactions to things that happen this helps to keep a stoic
attitude why giving up control is a good thing peace of mind when you focus on only what you can control you let go of worry and anxiety that you don't need this makes your mind calmer and more peaceful better relationships when you let go of the need to control other people your relationships will be better because you will accept their right to be themselves and focus on how you act greater resilience when you accept that you can't control everything you learn to adapt to Life's obstacles instead of fighting them adopt stoic principles the stoic way
of dealing with control doesn't mean giving up it means putting your energy where it counts you can live a more balanced happy and meaningful life if you follow these rules takeaways for real life remember that you can only control your own Deeds thoughts and attitudes think about these things and let go of the rest there will be more freedom and peace in your daily life if you do this number two the mask of charm in our daily lives we often come across people who seem naturally Charming people are drawn to them pay attention to them
and remember them a lot of the time this attractive quality is called charm but what's really going on beneath this charm is it something you are born with or something you can learn shape and maybe even use as a tool or a mask the idea behind the mask of charm is that charm is not just a natural trait but a mask that people can put on to trick control or reach their goals this idea goes against the common belief that charm is only good because it suggests that it can be used with purpose sometimes to
hide less good purposes as we go through this lesson we will look at the many sides of charm and how it can be used both well and badly we will talk about the logic behind charm the tricks people use to show it and how to tell when someone is hiding behind charm we can be more aware of the social forces at work in our interactions and make better decisions about our relationships if we understand these processes how to understand charm a two-edged sword explain what charm is and what makes it up like confidence social intelligence
and understanding talk about the different ways that charm can be used for good and bad bring up the idea that charm can be used as a mask to hide real goals how charm works in the mind look into the mental traits that make someone Charming such as ego machiavellianism and emotional intelligence talk about how these traits can be improved or boosted to make a person more appealing look at how tone of speech body language and other non-verbal cues can be used to project charm tips for getting more charm give useful advice on how to become
more Charming like how to listen actively keep eye contact and use humor talk about how to be both real and Charming at the same time and how important authenticity is in charm think about the moral effects of consciously trying to be Charming charm as a way to control people look at how charm can be used to control other people especially in personal and business situations give some examples of how charm can be used to get people to trust you change their minds or draw attention away from your flaws talk about what will happen to the
person and their relationships in the long run if they use charm as a way to get what they want how to spot the mask of charm give tips on how to spot people who are using charm as a mask like noticing when their behavior isn't consistent or when they flatter you too much talk about how instincts and gut feelings can help you spot manipulative charm give advice on how to avoid being too affected by charm like setting limits and looking for different points of view how charm affects how people get along look into how charm
affects things like leadership keeping the group together and resolving conflicts what does charm mean in different cultural settings how do cultural rules affect how we see charm look into the relationship between charm and power and how people in power often use charm to keep their control how to use charm in a moral way talk about how important it is to use charm in a moral way that respects other people's privacy and well-being look into situations where charm can be useful like when you're trying to be polite helping customers or giving an inspiring speech encourage people
to think about how they use charm and how their Acts affect other people case studies how the mask of charm Works show examples from real life of people who have used charm as a mask in both good and bad ways look at how these cases turned out and point out the lessons that can be learned talk about how these examples show what you learned in the lesson useful applications give people real life tasks they can use to to improve their charm in an honest way get people to look at how they use charm in their
daily lives and think about it give people more reading and learning materials on the subject of charm and social impact in conclusion the real story behind charm outline the main points that were talked about in the lesson stress that charm is a strong tool but it should only be used in an honest and thoughtful way encourage Watchers to use what they've learned in this lesson to improve their relationships with others and avoid falling for manipulative charm people who watch this lesson will have a better idea of how complicated charm is how it can be both
a gift and a tool and how to get around in a world where charm is often used as a mask number three the absence of empathy being able to understand and share someone else's feelings is called empathy it is a very important skill for making connections and keeping good relationships in today's fast-paced and increasingly Digital World however more and more people are worried that humanity is disappearing we'll talk about what this means for people and Society why it's important and how we can make the world a more empathetic place what does empathy mean understanding empathy
being able to understand and share someone else's thoughts and feelings is what empathy is emotional connection is what lets us get along with other people ways to show empathy cognitive empathy is the capacity to see things from someone else's point of view or comprehend their thoughts emotional empathy means being able to understand how someone else feels empathy that makes you want to help others because you understand how they feel and the pain they are going through what empathy does for how people get along building relationships to make deep lasting connections with other people you need
to understand how they feel it helps people trust and understand each other which are important for any relationship promoting cooperation empathy encourages collaboration by helping people understand each other's needs and points of view and work together successfully resolution of conflicts empathy helps people see things from the other person's point of view which leads to more effective and peaceful answers what happens when people don't feel empathy emotional isolation people may feel separated from others if they don't have empathy which can lead to loneliness and emotional isolation lack of empathy can make problems worse because people may
become more self-centered and less willing to understand or compromise with others loss of social cohesiveness one important part of social cohesiveness is empathy without it groups might break up and people might not want to help or understand each other other as much effects on Mental Health showing empathy is good for both the person getting it and the person showing it more people are getting anxiety sadness and other mental health problems because they don't understand how others feel things that are making people less empathetic digital communication the rise of digital communication has connected people all over
the world but it it doesn't always have the emotional depth of face-to-face conversations this might make it harder to understand and show understanding social media sites that encourage quick often surface level conversations can make it harder to connect closely with others because of the privacy and distance of internet communication people may also be less empathetic changes in culture in some societies more comp competition and individualism can cause ideals like empathy to fall out of favor busy lives the fast pace of modern life doesn't leave much time for the Deep thoughtful thinking that empathy needs distractions
and doing too many things at once make it harder to be present and listen to others signs that people don't feel as much empathy growing divides in society whether they are political cultural or ideological are of often caused by people not being able to understand each other people who don't agree with them are less likely to understand or talk to them Rising rudeness not being able to relate to others can show up as rude and disrespectful Behavior this is clear in all encounters whether they happen online or off rudess and violence are becoming more common
dehumanizing others if you don't have empathy for for other people it's easy to see them as less than or not worth your time this can lead to dehumanization and even violence why empathy is important in leadership empathetic leaders leaders who show empathy are better able to understand their followers wants and concerns which helps them make decisions that are both effective and caring building trust leaders who show empathy can help their teams trust each other which makes the work Place more cooperative and helpful driving change leaders who show empathy can motivate others build a shared vision
and make their communities and businesses better places to live how to grow your empathy active listening if you want to understand someone you need to listen to them without judging them or getting distracted this means giving your full attention thinking about what is is being said and answering with care perspective taking putting yourself in someone else's shoes on purpose can help you understand how they feel and what they've been through mindfulness and self-reflection can help you get better at this exercise emotional literacy to be more empathetic you need to learn more about your own feelings
and the emotions of others this can be improved by writing in a journal going to therapy y or talking about your thoughts with people you [Music] trust compassion practice doing acts of kindness and compassion on a regular basis can make relationships with others stronger this includes helping others giving or just being there for people who need it getting rid of digital overload taking breaks from computers and talking to people in person can help you connect with them on a deeper level being kind in the digital age how to balance technology and human connection technology can
get in the way of humanity but it can also help build it if used wisely online communities support groups and educational material can help people understand and care about others digital detox getting people to unplug from their electronics for a while can help them connect with their own and other people's feelings use social media with care being careful about how we interact on social media focusing on positive interactions staying away from Echo Chambers and being aware of how our words affect others can help keep and even grow empathy online how education can help build empathy
teaching empathy in schools teaching empathy as part of school lessons can help kids build emotional intelligence from a very young age roleplaying group discussions and tasks that make you think are all examples of this parenting for empathy parents can show their kids how to be empathetic and urge them to do it in their everyday lives this can be done by talking about feelings getting people to share and building a sense of community plans for the community empathy can also be built through Community projects that bring people together to talk about their problems and help each
other such things as support groups cultural exchange programs and neighborhood events can be part of this understanding and world problems taking on global problems to solve Global problems like poverty Injustice and climate change we need to have empathy people and groups are more likely to take action that matters if they understand and share the worries of those who are affected humanitarian efforts people who care about others are motivated to help those in need whether it's by giving money working or speaking out promoting global citizenship in a world that is becoming more and more linked empathy
can help people see past National or cultural differences this can encourage a sense of global responsibility and cooperation lack of empathy is a serious problem that affects both people and society as a whole through knowing what empathy is realizing what happens when it's missing and taking steps to develop it in ourselves and others we can make the world a better place for everyone we can all make a difference in our daily lives by building empathy we can do this by actively listening understanding other points of view or using technology in a thoughtful way we should
try to be more understanding not just for our own good but for the good of everyone else as well number four the Web of Lies today false information moves more quickly than ever the internet social media and other forms of communication make it simple to share facts but they also make it very simple to spread lies this complicated Web of Lies can have bad effects changing how we see the world how much we believe other people and even how societies work we will talk about what lies are why people tell them how they affect people
and how we can avoid getting caught in the web of lying in this lesson how to tell the difference between lies a lie is a false statement told to trick someone there are many types types of lies from small harmless lies to Big dishonest ones different kinds of Lies White Lies are lies that don't hurt anyone and are often told to avoid making someone feel bad omissions are when you leave out important details to give the wrong image Fabrications are stories or facts that are made up from scratch stretching the truth to make something look
better or worse than it really is lying something means not accepting the truth or a clear fact reasons why people lie self-preservation staying away from punishment or bad results getting an advantage means getting power control or resources being socially acceptable means fitting in or being liked by other people altruism means looking out for someone else's feelings or health pathological lying is when someone lies all the time time often For No Good Reason how lies get spread in the digital age what social media have to do social media sites make it easy for information to spread
quickly often without being checked for accuracy or truth Sensational content gets more attention from algorithms which can cause fake information to spread Echo Chambers people in online groups who share similar views often support each other's beliefs this makes it easier for lies to spread without being questioned misinformation and fake news are when people spread false information on purpose for different reasons like political gain financial gain or social trickery fake news and AI the growth of deep fake technology which uses AI to make pictures videos or audio that look and sound real but aren't adds another
layer to the Web of Lies the effects of lies on people erosion of trust hearing lies a lot can make people less trusting which can cause problems in relationships and social isolation when someone lies to you it can make you feel stressed anxious and betrayed making choices lies can cause people to make bad choices based on false information which could have bad results about Society polarization lies and false information can make people even more divided which can lead to more fighting and hatred undermining democracy false information can weaken Democratic institutions and processes when it affects
how people think and make decisions effects on the economy business or financial lies can cost a lot of money and hurt people businesses and even whole economies around the world when it comes to international relations lies and false information can make it hard for countries to get along with each other which can lead to political problems or even War Global crisis when there is a global crisis like a disease or an environmental disaster false information can make it harder to respond effectively and make things worse how to spot and fight lies think critically when you
get information you should always ask who will gain from it and if it is based on evidence checking the the facts make sure the information you're given is correct by using trustworthy sources media literacy knowing how bias Works be aware of the possible biases in different news sour ources and look at things from different points of view how to spot false information to spot false information look out for shocking headlines a lack of reliable sources and language that makes you feel bad getting people to be honest set a good example when you talk to other
people be honest and tell them to do the same teaching others teach others especially younger people about how dangerous lies are and how important it is to tell the truth getting more skeptical learn to be skeptical about new information without becoming negative this will help you become more resilient strengthening Community to stop the spread of Lies encourage open and honest conversation in your community what this means for morals and philosophy concerns about ethics what is wrong with lying look into different philosophical views on lying like utilitarianism which says that the result determines what is right
or wrong and deontological ethics which says that lying is always wrong the effects of intent think about whether the reason someone lies changes the moral consequences of their actions stoic philosophy on being honest value of Truth according to stoicism being honest and having ethics are very important because lying is bad for the soul living in line with nature the stoics thought that being honest with ourselves was in line with our logical nature and would make us better people personal responsibility according to stoicism each person is responsible for their deed needs including the lies they tell
and the truths they stand for there are a lot of lies in the world today and they go all over lies can be useful in many situations but they can also have very bad effects on people groups and the whole world we can start to untangle this web and make the world more honest and open by learning what lies are and how to spot them as well as by encouraging people to be honest as we deal with the difficulties of the digital age the lessons of philosophical reflection critical thinking and media literacy become more and
more important for protecting ourselves and our communities from the widespread effect of Lies number five Mastery of manipulation a powerful tool that is often misread and used in the wrong way is manipulation at its core manipulation means being able to change or steer someone's actions choices or feelings in quiet often sneaky ways it's important to understand manipulation because it helps us tell when we're being manipulated and gives us the tools to protect ourselves or use manipulation in a moral way to master influence you need to know a lot about how people think how groups work
and how to talk to people understanding how people think and feel mental flaws learn about mental flaws like confirmation bias grounding and the halo effect and use them to change how other people see things emotional setoffs find your emotional triggers like fear greed or kindness and use them to help you make choices and take action methods of communication framing showing information in a way that changes it is interpreted like emphasizing good results and downplaying bad ones to persuade or to manipulate tell the difference between ethical persuasion being open and honest and influence using lies or
Force how societies work Authority and power know what part perceived Authority plays and how to use it or fight it when something is being used to control you social proof use the way people act in groups to change people's minds ways to manipulate someone mirroring to get to know someone and gain their trust subtly copy how they act tripping someone with guilt is a way to get them to do what you want gaslighting means to trick someone into questioning their own truth or sanity concerns about ethics intent and consequences always think about the goal of
manipulation and how it might affect other people strategies for defense learn to spot manipulation techniques and come up with ways to fight them useful applications negotiation and influence to get better results in negotiations while still being fair use manipulation tactics marketing and sales use tricks to get people to do what you want them to do but be aware of the moral limits how to spot manipulation subtle signs be aware of signs like excessive praise flattery or pressure that could mean someone is trying to trick you listen to your gut feelings of worry or discomfort should
be paid attention to because they could be signs of manipulative Behavior protecting yourself from manipulation when you think critically you should question motives look for proof and avoid making choices based on your feelings alone set limits to avoid being manipulated make your personal limits clear and stick to them mastering manipulation takes both knowing how to do it and caring about what's right it's important to be careful with this power because it can be used to control and affect people understanding manipulation not only gives you the power to persuade others but it also also helps you
avoid being influenced number six an unexpected revealing sign there are times in our lives when things happen that we didn't expect but that teach us a lot even though these events aren't always obvious they can teach us a lot about ourselves our situations or the world around us for us they are like signs or lights that help us find our way figuring out what these sign s mean can help you grow as a person and gain a deeper understanding of your place in the world this lesson talks about how to spot and react to these
surprising signs that reveal something what is an unexpected revealing sign an event or occurrence that seems out of the ordinary but gives Insight or Clarity often connected to thinking about oneself making changes or getting a better grasp on a situation how to read the sign pay close attention to times when you feel strongly or when your view changes pay attention to Trends or Oddities that stand out in your daily life when something feels important or special trust your gut how to read the sign think about what the sign might mean or what it could teach
you think about how this sign applies to your life your goals or the problems your facing right now if you're not sure what the sign means get help from people you trust how to respond to the sign do something on your own based on what the sign tells you use the sign to help you make changes or grow in a good way accept the chance to grow and learn even if the sign shows you some hard facts what stoicism can do for us stoicism says that these kinds of signs are part of Nature and lead
us to be good and wise according to stoic beliefs we should stay calm and logical when bad things happen and use them as chances to get better signs that reveal things you didn't expect a sudden shift in a relationship that makes you think about what you value a setback in your work that makes you realize a new passion or path you hadn't thought of before a random encounter that leads to an important link or Insight getting used to uncertainty accept that not every sign will mean exactly what you think it means right away be open
and patient and trust that knowledge will come in time follow the stoic idea of amor Fati which means love of fate and accept whatever the sign says whether it's good or bad usage in real life keep a journal to write down and think about the surprising signs that show you things talk about these signs with a mentor or other people in your neighborhood to get different points of view check in with these signs often to see how they fit in with your growth and journey by noticing and understanding these unexpectedly revealing signs we can live
our lives with more awareness and make choices that are in line with our values and real purpose in conclusion recognize ing the signs of an evil person is crucial for protecting your peace and maintaining your integrity stoicism teaches us to remain Vigilant grounded and to focus on our own actions and reactions while we can't control the behavior of others we can control how we respond to them by understanding these signs and applying stoic principles we can avoid getting entangled in the negativity of others and continue to live a life of virtue remember it's not about
labeling others but about safeguarding your own well-being and staying true to your values thank you for watching and as always stay resilient and keep practicing stoicism
