He Eats People

so this kid, he really wants to eat people literally. Now his name is Isai, and he's from Japan. He comes from a really wealthy family, and one day he's in class in the first grade.

He starts noticing his classmate's legs, and Isai is like, “Damn, that leg looks kind of tasty. ” In fact, it looks so tasty to him that he kind of has the urge to bite into it. His classmate is a boy, and he doesn't even like boys.

That's when Isai realizes that he kind of wants to eat people. From that point on, he regularly fantasizes about gnawing on people constantly. As the years pass, this fantasy of his just gets stronger and stronger, and specifically, he has a thing for Western women who are tall, 'cuz you know, he's a short king.

So he wants to eat a tall white woman. Eventually, Isai grows up, and he's 24 years old. By this point, he's going out of his mind with these cannibalism fantasies.

That's when he finally gets an opportunity, 'cuz one day, around this time, he notices a young German woman, and she's tall and white. So Isai low-key starts to follow her around, even following her to her home. In doing that, he notices that when the weather is warm, she leaves her bedroom window open at night.

So then one night, he decides he's going to go for it. He's going to sneak into her apartment, cut off a piece of her, and he's going to eat it. So he goes to her apartment, climbs in, and creeps through her window while she's there in her bed sleeping.

Now he's in her apartment, and unfortunately for him, she hears him. Suddenly, bam, she wakes up and she starts screaming. She freaks out and pushes him down to the ground because, you know, he's not very big, so she overpowers him.

Isai panics and he's like, “Oh [ __ ],” and he runs away. But unfortunately for him, she calls the police, and the police catch up to him, and bam, they arrest him. They have no idea that he was trying to eat this woman, so they just end up charging him with SA.

But remember how I said that he comes from a wealthy family? Well, lucky for him, his dad steps in and pays a large settlement to that German woman in exchange for her dropping the SA charges against Isai. So after all that, Isai walks away from this with a clean record.

Four years later, he moves from Tokyo all the way over to Paris. I mean, he's 28 years old at this point, and he wants to study language and get his PhD from the University there. However, his desire to eat people still hasn't gone away.

So while he's there in Paris, trying to get his PhD, nearly every night he hires a prostitute and he brings them home. There he waits for a moment when they turn their back to him, and when they do, he low-key gets his rifle, 'cause I guess he has a rifle, and he points it at them 'cause he's going to unlive them. But lucky for the prostitutes, Isai can't ever bring himself to pull the trigger.

He just doesn't have the nerve. He's scared about what will happen to him if he finally does it, and so he goes through this routine night after night. He brings a hooker back to his place, points his rifle at them when they aren't looking, and every time he fails to follow through.

This goes on for a few years. But then one day, everything changes for Isai because he meets this woman, Renee. Renee is a sweet, friendly student, and she's in one of his literature classes.

She also happens to be a tall white woman. So Isai befriends her, and at some point, he invites her over to his place so that they can work on an assignment together. Once she's there, and they're studying or whatever, she's sitting down at a table writing.

She's not paying attention to him, and that is when Isai gets his rifle. He sneaks up behind her, points it right at her head, and he pulls the trigger. Click.

The gun misfires. Renee doesn't notice or even hear what's happening behind her 'cause she's concentrating so hard on her studies. Then two days later, Isai invites her back over, and again she's sitting down at a table writing.

Isai does the same thing; he sneaks out of the room to get his rifle again, creeps up behind her, points it at her head, and pulls the trigger. Blam! But this time, no misfire—she's unalived.

Oddly, Isai's shocked; he can't believe that he actually went through with it, so he faints and falls on the floor. Moments later, he wakes up and regains consciousness, and he's like, “Okay, I guess I have to eat her now. ” Because he's a disgusting person, he dismembers her body, and then he proceeds to try and eat her, but he realizes his teeth aren't sharp enough.

So then he has to leave the apartment and go out and buy a butcher knife. But yeah, then he eats as much of her as he can. A few days later, the body is decomposing at this point, and he's like, “Sh**, I got to get her out of the apartment.

” So he stuffs what's left of her into two suitcases. Then he brings those suitcases to a nearby park to dispose of them. But while he's at the park, some bystanders notice that there's a lot of blood dripping from this guy's suitcases, and it doesn't take.

. . Long for people to call the police, and so bam, they arrest Isai again.

Here's a photo of him being escorted by French police, and here is another one. Isai admits to unaliving Renee, and they throw him in jail, but it's not over, 'cause Isai is about to get kind of famous from all this. So he sits in jail for about two years, waiting on his trial.

Meanwhile, his rich dad pays for good legal defense, like the most expensive lawyer they could find. Ultimately, the judge finds Isai legally insane and unfit to stand trial, so they end up dropping the charges, and they send him to a psychiatric facility. Eventually, he's deported and transferred to another psych facility in Tokyo, Japan.

But since he had been declared legally insane and the charges had been technically dropped in France, his court documents had been officially sealed, which means the Japanese government can't charge him with a crime because there are no legal documents to back it up. So unfortunately, they have to let him go. Only five years after he murdered Renee, he checks out of the psych facility in Tokyo, and now he's free.

But he has trouble getting work because, you know, businesses tend to not hire people who eat other people. But then one day, a magazine approaches him, and they ask him to write an article for them, and they pay him a shitload of Yen for it. So he does, and that gives Isai an idea.

He's like, "Oh snap, why don’t I make some money writing books? " I mean, he did study literature; he can write. So he starts writing books, like novels about his crime, about his obsession with eating people, and about what he did to Renee.

He does interviews and stuff, and he becomes kind of a minor celebrity in Japan. Bro even writes a manga, and he illustrates it and has it published. It's all about his experience unaliving and eating Renee, and it's like translated into English and everything.

It's on Amazon; like, anyone can go and buy it right now, and it's real messed up. Here, let me show you. I put the two suitcases in front of the door.

It took me two nights to cut Renee. In one suitcase, there was the head, arms, and legs; in the other, the torso. Why does this exist?

What the [ __ ]? Japan, anyway. After this, Isai doesn't eat anyone else, as far as we know, and he eventually dies from pneumonia at 73 years old.

And here's a picture of him in real life.