Caught My Wife Cheating at Her Summer Writing Workshop, So I Hired a PI, Got Evidence, and...

caught my wife cheating at her summer writing Workshop so I hired a pie got evidence and disappeared Without a Trace before she returned I go by Andrew Baker but my buddies call me AB never Andy there's always some annoying drunk or ignorant guy who tries to act too familiar and calls me Andy so Andy what's your job they ask I respond I create this cool little Gadget that cops can use from 40 ft away to check for drunk people they've even started attaching them to Radars around town that usually shuts them up but in case

you haven't figured it out yet that Gadget isn't real it's clear that I have little patience for foolishness lie to me and things get worse I'm a simple guy not complex at all I enjoy a straightforward life and find satisfaction in my work I work as an engineer for a big National company with offices all over the country I have friends and while I'm not a heavy drinker I do have an occasional beer honestly I lean more towards nachos but that's my battle if I let it get out of control I'll gain weight so I

make an effort to keep myself in decent shape for my age I used to go sailing every chance I got but having a wife and two young daughters takes up a lot of time eventually I sold the boat that was just one of the compromises I've willingly made over the years so I could have quality time with the people who really matter to me I've been happily married to Karen for 25 years she's a high school teacher our two daughters are now in college Claire is studying at Brown University in Rhode Island and her younger

sister Denise is attending Boston University I probably couldn't afford those expensive schools but luckily the girls are dedicated students and secured impressive scholarships our home is in North Carolina specifically an area known as the Research Triangle it's centered around some excellent universities in Raleigh and is surrounded by top-notch high-tech companies living and working here is wonderful I could tell you about Carolina barbq but it would just make me hungry I was somewhat disappointed when the girls opted for colleges up North but I understand they needed to explore beyond their comfort zone and that's ultimately a

positive thing our daughters are amazing intelligent funny Charming young women with strong moral values I worry about their safety d daily but I trust their decision-making witnessing them grow up and take their initial steps towards independence meant that my wife and I could finally have some time for ourselves again i' had been looking forward to this stage for a while with both girls away at College I imagine returning home every evening to a loving wife who would focus her attention on me and vice versa I pictured us rekindling our connection leading to days filled with

happiness it was almost like being newlyweds once more we could enjoy dinners out attend plays in movies and finally ReDiscover each other the way I had always wished however reality didn't unfold exactly as I had envisioned to be honest looking back on that first year of having an empty nest I noticed Karen undergoing changes it seemed like her interests were shifting while the shift was gradual it became more evident with time initially I thought these changes were her way of flourishing now that our daughters were no longer living with us however I eventually realized that

what I was observing was a significant transformation in her values and priorities Karen is an English teacher specializing in creative writing to be fair she's also a frustrated writer being a young mother and teacher she never really had the chance to write as she wanted during the summer and whenever she could spare an hour or two Karen dedicates time to writing but so far not much has come out of it she used to send her essays and short stories to literary magazines only to accumulate a collection of rejection letters the grand Masterpiece she hoped for

never materialized I'll admit I do enjoy reading her writing but as a writer she's never gone beyond formulaic and sometimes overly dramatic stories she has a romanticized notion of what a writer should be and secretly I suspect she's more attracted to the idea of being a writer than the actual writing nevertheless if she's content then I'm content too throughout most of our marriage Karen has been a member of various writing groups these are Gatherings of people who come together to help each other by providing critiques suggestions and discussions on their work aiming to improve each

other's writing some of these groups have seemed genuinely productive to Me While others appear to be more like clubs of mutual admiration her last group which was the one she belonged to when things fell apart had elements of both they took turns meeting at each other's homes and during their meetings here I'd try to give them space I attempted to participate once but Karen and a few others disapproved so I stopped trying Karen's current writing group consists of around 10 members including both men and women I'm fond of some of them While others I could

do without half of them are rather unremarkable and the other half leave a strong impression when you meet them for instance Reggie a woman is heavily invested in writing histories and biographies she conducts real research and writes books with a scholarly aspect while still a to engage readers I've read all of her books and enjoyed them Betty has a pension for writing fantasy I don't think she envisions herself as the next JK rolling she leans more towards the Talking Unicorn type she's friendly and her writing seems to be mainly for her own pleasure who can

argue with that bill assumes the role of the groups no atall a little of that goes a long way but aside from that he seems all right then there's Frank I felt alarmed the first time I met him and those alarms have continued to ring in my head ever since when I met Frank it was quite clear that I was being introduced to him rather than the other way around he looked at me and asked so Andy what's your profession I glanced at my wife who gave me a slight frown and shook her head I

simply responded I'm an engineer Frank did he offer a smile or more of a smirk in return I mentioned that I had given up attempting to engage with their group preferring to stay somewhat hidden and unobtrusive though not exactly out of earshot when they visit I'll often be in the Next Room quietly working or on the back porch with a window open so I can hear their conversation until they forget I'm around I noticed early on that when Frank talks with Karen they seem to share private jokes and a connection that makes me uncomfortable sometimes

he boosts her ego and other times it's as if he knows her inner thoughts in a way I don't appreciate he references past conversations that seem to be only between them and I get the impression that the rest of the group doesn't remember those moments it's just a feeling but I'm not fond of it and I've told her so she brushes off my concerns and I've learned not to push the matter I've made sure she understands my sentiments the rest is up to her the group follows a routine during their meetings after their work session

they relax with some wine and unwind it's during this time that I realized some of them are merely putting on an act it happened in the middle of the spring semester around early March when the topic shifted to the lifestyles of true writers oh you know all the famous writers were alcoholics that's right they wrote in the mornings and drank in the afternoons and evenings it relaxes the mind and opens it up to new ideas then in the mornings their creative thoughts start flowing and they begin to write in fact the truly accomplished writers all

experienced romantic relationship ship that's what truly motivated them that's what Frank was saying thanks for sharing Frank I'm starting to understand where you're coming from that's when Karen's words hit me like a punch in the gut oh absolutely it's the intensity and the thrill of the unknown the excitement of keeping it all hidden from everyone else that's where the genuine inspiration is found some of them chuckled While others didn't so I convinced myself it was just a Gest yet I kept an ear on their conversation for the rest of the evening maybe we should all

have a wild night of passion sometime and then we'll each write the Next Great American novel that came from Bill I couldn't quite figure out if he meant it humorously or not character flaws don't serve as the basis for exceptional writing what truly builds outstanding stories are qualities like Humanity empathy and confronting the mysteries of the unknown I mentioned before that I liked Betty Unforgettable stories are about overcoming challenges striving for greatness Despite All Odds and leaving the world in a better State than it was before well perhaps if you conjure the right enchantment we

can avoid all the hassle that was that jerk Frank again to their disgrace some in the group seemed to find that amusing I'm not so sure Betty did and I had a hunch Reggie didn't either They carried on talking about writer drinking habits and Affairs and I continued to Eaves drop without giving anything away then I caught an intriguing part of their conversation is anyone else planning to apply for the Illinois writer Workshop this Summer Frank was speaking once more oh I already submitted my application I'm keeping my fingers crossed they'll accept me 6 weeks

of just writing and discussing with fellow writers it could really transform things for me it was Karen and this was the first time I had heard about it Frank picked up on it right away I'm sure they'll accept you your writing has shown so much improvement this past year I believe you'll be admitted I've applied as well although I'm not as certain I'll get in my internal radar for nonsense was off the charts seriously Frank when did you become so modest I didn't like what I was hearing but at this juncture I still cared deeply

for and trusted my wife when you've been married as long as we have trust is fundamental you don't question is she up to no good the thought doesn't even cross your mind marriage is a partnership and your spouse is your other half she's shown her commitment year after year and all you truly desire is for her to find the success and happiness she deserves or at least that's what you believe then later on it all crumbles when you discover your trust has been shattered update one as time went by I allowed myself to put aside

that evening's overheard conversation just like I mentioned I had full trust in my wife some younger guys might not get that but after being married for over 20 years trust becomes a way of living rather than just a choice it was late April and I was finishing up some gardening outside when I decided to call it a day and head indoors as I reached for the kitchen door I caught my wife talking on the phone saying I can't wait six whole weeks without any responsibilities no commitments and no one waiting for me to get back

I perked up at that last part I froze in place and listened absolutely it's going to be the most self-indulgent 6 weeks of my life I owe it to myself and so do you none of this sat well with me I pushed the door open and entered the kitchen Karen seemed startled well I have to run AB is here and I need to start preparing dinner she hung up quickly who was that on the phone oh just Reggie we were talking about school wrapping up soon like hell it was I thought I wanted to question

her about certain things she had said especially that part about no one waiting for me to come home but I sense that the truth might be in short supply tonight my mood darkened but I made an effort to conceal it for the moment later that night after dinner the other shoe dropped AB you won't believe the fantastic news I received today remember that writer Workshop in Illinois I applied for no come on you hardly pay attention to me to be honest I had heard about that Workshop before but that was only because I'd overheard her

discussing it that night over a month ago I don't recall you mentioning it yes I did I applied for a six-week Writers Workshop it's from mid June to Late July at the University of Illinois they have lectures by their professors and they bring an accomplished writers for seminars and discussion groups and then we do a lot of writing It's a Wonderful opportunity and I got accepted that sounds wonderful honey I'm sure we can manage it financially maybe I can take a little time off work and join you I'd love to listen to those writers talks

her reaction seems surprised oh well we can consider it it's going to be a really intense 6 weeks and I won't have much free time to spend with you my instincts were tingling again well you know I'm not demanding and maybe I could be the coffee guy for the group she offered a slightly nervous smile that could be nice dear let's see how it goes I've been in the receiving end of such deflections before and I knew what it meant she was planning to ensure I wouldn't end up going to Illinois with her I get

the feeling you'd rather I didn't go with you oh no it's not like that I just worry you might find it dull you're into computers and circuits and this is just writers talking about Big Ideas bck I didn't voice it but mentally I was shouting it loud enough for the whole neighborhood to hear I'm not unintelligent honey oh I didn't mean it like that I'm just saying your mind leans towards details writers grapple with larger life questions big big but I kept that thought to myself I could tell when I was being sidelined I'm sure

you'll Excel she's caught up tonight later that evening after Karen had gone to bed I logged on to the internet to review our phone records AT&T offers that feature all incoming and outgoing calls along with text messages are recorded I examined the phone log and the call that I had interrupted wasn't with Reggie or if it was it originated from Frank's phone it's astonishing how quickly trust can crumble after a quarter Century of marriage when you catch your wife lying and discover her making plans to exclude you weeks passed and she seemed consumed by discussions

about the workshop I attempted multiple times to discuss the idea of going with her or visiting at some point but she dismissed the idea each time then she shifted from rationalization to manipulation AB I've got the most exciting news I got you and Jake two tickets to a fishing camp in Northern Canada in late June you can take Jake and both of you can enjoy fishing for those big brown fish you're always talking about it was quite expensive but I wanted to express my gratitude for your understanding about the writer's workshop and I felt a

bit guilty that you wouldn't be enjoying yourself so I want you to go and have a great time then we can share our experiences when I return I suspected something wasn't right thanks dear that was considerate of you honestly I'd have a better time with you AB we've been through this it's just not logical I'll be working throughout and I'd feel bad neglecting you like that I studied her face and eyes briefly trying to interpret what I saw was it condescension thanks honey Canada sounds fun my tone lacked enthusiasm in my mind I was plotting

my options a surprise trip to Illinois was at the Forefront well you could at least say it with a smile those tickets were expensive and I want you to be happy sure sounds fun I headed down to the basement to Tinker for the rest of the evening our house is old and has one of those floor grates in the hallway it lets warm air flow from the furnace room and was the original way of heating the first floor initially I made a point not to step on it accidentally but over time I grew used to

it and forgot about it presence the phone is also in the hallway I was quietly working in the basement contemplating my next steps when I overheard Karen making a call yes I gave him the tickets he's still hesitant I don't know I keep telling him he won't enjoy it no I can't just tell him not to come I understand and I want that too but I want to stay married afterward I just need him to give me some space to enjoy myself for a few weeks I deserve it I've earned it yes I want those

weeks with you as well all right let's wait a bit I think he'll come around okay baby I miss you too write something great for me tonight with that she ended the call I felt a lump in my throat I'm not clueless I recognize infidelity when I hear it either Karen was in an affair or considering one anything less and she'd still have a lot of explaining to do it took me 20 minutes to gather my thoughts but I knew that for now I had to become the kind of liar I've always detested at least

for the moment I needed to keep my intentions hidden until I figured out my plan I called upstairs and in my most affectionate tone said Karen I'm heading over to see Jake and give him the good news oh that's great dear enjoy and just like that I was out the basement door I needed distance visiting Jake was merely an excuse as I pondered it I realized I needed someone to confide in and Jake had been my closest friend since childhood you're kidding me Jake never beat around the bush no way I don't buy it she'd

never betray you AB well she's certainly working hard to keep me away from that workshop and she's calling someone baby and it's definitely not me we just sat there silent that's what most guys need from a buddy just sitting together sharing the pain you need to have a conversation with her about this AB you can't go through the next couple of months assuming the worst without knowing the truth and what's she going to say how much do you want to bet that when I checked the phone records tonight it wasn't Frank she was talking to

it wasn't Frank she called baby and it wasn't Frank she's plotting with I'm not taking that bet so what's your plan I'm going to sit down and have an honest talk that's what you do after being together for 25 years I'll express my love for her let her know I'm hurt that she doesn't want me to go with her and I'll straightforwardly ask her what she's up to that she doesn't want me there do you think she'll tell you the truth nope but I'll tell her the truth even if some of it isn't what she

wants to hear she'll understand how much I love her she'll know that cheating on me would end our relationship and then she'll probably try to convince me that I'm imagining things and should just go fishing I paused For a Moment by the way I've got two tickets for a fishing camp in Northern Canada in late June and one's for you nice Jake caught himself I mean I'm here to support you buddy I had to chuckle I've always been sure where his loyalty lies we chatted shared our thoughts and had a few drinks over the next

3 hours before I headed home after dinner I asked Karen to come sit with me in the living room and I opened up about everything that had been bothering me well almost everything I held back a couple of things sweetheart I've got some serious concerns I don't believe you've been completely upfront with me about this writer's Workshop I overheard you discussing it with your writer group back in March yet you didn't mention it to me until you had already made plans to attend I even overheard you talking about how Affairs are common among great writers

and I must admit I didn't find that amusing you've been having conversations with Frank about your trip but when I inquire you give me false information and claim it's someone else you're aware of my feelings about that guy then when you told me about getting accepted you seemed purposely distant and discouraged me from being a part of it I don't have to be there but I wanted to share in this exciting Journey with you instead of considering that you made arrangements for me to be somewhere else without even discussing it with me just making a

commitment on my behalf it appears like you're trying to ensure that I won't be around while you're in Illinois I don't think you've been completely honest with me and I'm starting to question whether you've been completely faithful AB I've never treated you that way and I would never be unfaithful to you what's gotten into you you're my husband and all I want is for you to have a good time it really hurts me that you could think something like that about me I can't control how I feel or what triggers those feelings you know I

love you I've loved you since we first met but I can't just overlooked the idea of betrayal is that what you're planning Karen is this writer's Workshop meant to be your escape from our marriage update to that was the end of our conversation no more understanding or affectionate talk she exploded into yelling and for the rest of the night it was either shouting or Silence from her and for the following week it was all silent she was using the silent treatment as a way to force me to back down trying to push me to submit

however it didn't work in fact it only strengthened my convictions but I realized I wasn't making progress this way so eventually I allowed her to believe she had succeeded if she was planning to cheat there wasn't much I could do to prevent it the phone conversation I overheard even suggested she might have already done So eventually I thanked her for the trip to Canada but my mood remained gloomy and it didn't lift until the trip was over once she got what she wanted she quickly changed her demeanor and acted like a loving wife to reinforce

the behavior she wanted from me it was as if she flipped a switch and it only heightened my suspicion I recognize manipulation when I'm on the receiving end of it the Illinois Writers Workshop was a about 500 M away and I didn't know anyone there so I asked a cooworker who he consulted when he suspected his wife of cheating I followed his advice and the person he recommended was based in Illinois I reached out to them for assistance the workshop's location was advantageous as it took place on a State University campus the pills operatives couldn't

participate in the program but they could move around the campus and observe the rooms as needed the participants would dine in the campus cafeterias visit local bars and stay in a large dormatory with other students this provided an opportunity for inconspicuous surveillance some of these students would actually be working for me equipped with Advanced devices as the school year was coming to an end our daughters decided to remain at their universities for the summer to work in research Labs with their professors this meant we were still empty nesters and I made a concerted effort I

invited her to dinners cooked at home and took her to various shows she seemed to enjoy everything and I started to believe I was making progress however whenever I expressed my love for her I sensed a dismissive I know attitude from her slowly the pieces of the puzzle fell into place it wasn't that she had stopped loving me she had simply taken me for granted I was familiar reliable and her safety net she felt assured that she could go away seek excitement take a break from our marriage and I would be waiting when she returned

this realization led to my plans falling into place the day she departed I realized I couldn't leave things unspoken we stood near the door as her shuttle for the airport arrived holding her tightly I expressed my love and pleaded please don't do anything that could ruin us in response she she shot me an irritated look and retorted I'm tired of you not trusting me when I return we'll have a serious conversation about this she gave me a quick kiss on the cheek grabbed her bags and headed toward the shuttle she drove away without a single

glance back at me at that moment I felt certain my marriage was coming to an end after 25 years and our two grown daughters it seemed our relationship was fading away without much of a fuss the private investigator carried out his job effectively according to him they didn't bother hiding their actions as they were in an unfamiliar place a upon arrival at the workshop Karen must have removed her wedding rings on the plane as they were absent from her finger she openly claimed to be recently divorced and my wife and Frank immediately became Inseparable they

were constantly together sharing kisses holding hands and acting like infatuated high school students my Pi ingeniously placed a small video camera in the dormatory hallway where they stayed though Karen and Frank each had their own assigned room they only used one of them occasionally they used her room sometimes his but always they spent the nights together I was already aware of what was transpiring in those shared dorm rooms yet my pi and his team went a Great Lengths to confirm my suspicions one evening before it got dark my wife and Frank retired early two operatives

appearing like typical college students sat against the hallway wall discreetly slipping a miniature fish eye camera beneath the door this device captured a 20-minute video of Frank in action the video quality was surprisingly clear and when he finished it was evident he hadn't used protection that was the final straw for me my decision was clear I was done with this Merit anything else the team uncovered was just additional evidence to solidify my stance my private investigator kept me updated regularly but after that initial week her Destiny was clear and my choice was made starting from

the early days of her Workshop I used my time to put my plan into action I aimed to become a Vanishing presence almost like a ghost when she returned I would have disappeared and there would be no going back no lies no ultimatums no lengthy talks explanations justifications or attempts to mend things there would only be divorce my marriage had come to an end love doesn't fade quickly but what's love without trust a future can't exist with a cheating wife some might argue that my solution was feeble they could suggest she deserves physical punishment utter

embarrassment and complete destitution however in the end the law would prevent me from pursuing any of that and I had no intention of ruining the rest of my life by seeking such vindictive revenge on my Unfaithful wife and her lover my revenge would be taking away the one thing she always relied on the steady presence that supported her consoled her uplifted her her and motivated her I was taking Myself Away Frank wasn't a worthy catch he couldn't provide what she needed long term where would have divorced 50-year-old mother find love and emotional stability I wasn't

concerned she wouldn't be my concern any longer every few days my private investigator would send me more pictures more videos and more evidence of betrayal by the person who promised me loyalty Above All Else the reports were difficult to read and the photos and videos were even more painful to watch the audio recordings were the hardest to Bear especially when they discussed me he's always texting me about the fish he's catching and how amazing it is up there he thanks me nearly every day she said with a laugh he's clueless Frank joined in the laughter

keep him in the dark treat him like a mushroom and you're free from his annoyance he might as well enjoy himself for now when I return I'll confront that nerd about his accusations how dare he keep accusing me of cheating but you are taking a little break from our marriage right beautiful or is that another woman sharing my bed every night she actually giggled at that what a maybe he's on to something but I won't tolerate it I'm a writer damn it and he's holding me back with his circuits and computer jargon his millimeters and

micro thingamajigs what does he understand about Big Ideas update three I pondered various Revenge tactics I realized that none of those options would truly satisfy me as long as my life remained connected to hers only one choice remained so I began the process of distancing myself from her I had an open conversation with my boss explaining everything he understood having gone through something similar himself not too long ago he arranged a transfer for me to our company's office in Portland Maine I found the idea appealing I was familiar with the people there they were skilled

and professional and I enjoyed their company the town and the state both appealed to me I scheduled movers to transport half of the furniture and all my personal belongings up north I ensured my car was in good shape for the journey then I consulted with a lawyer to initiate the divorce proceedings as for financial matters Karen had her own insurance and retirement account I removed her name from all my assets and made my daughter the beneficiaries I signed a quick claim for the house granting it to her in exchange for no alimony she would keep

her car but needed to handle her own insurance I planned to handle the bank accounts and credit cards closer to the end keeping my intentions discreet from that moment forward I focused on reinforcing my resolve what I mean is this I attempted to call her to inquire about how the workshop was progressing and to express my love I believe that hearing her lies would strengthen my conviction that my actions were Justified she didn't disappoint in less than 2 minutes she answered with enthusi iasm declared her affection and hurried off to dinner my private investigator later

informed me that Frank was right beside her exchanging knowing glances and mocking gestures which only affirmed my decision it became evident that she treated the situation as a joke confirming that I was on the right path subsequently I chose to communicate with her through text messages instead of phone calls as I wasn't sure I could keep my emotions in check over the phone I would update her about successful fishing trips but in truth I sent Jake and his wife on those outings they had a great time Jake made a wise choice and his spouse I

did pay them a farewell visit before my departure and they promised to come see me as her six-week Workshop Drew to a close I concluded my final tasks a friend who's a real estate agent gave me a for sale sign a place in the front yard I couldn't actually sell the house without her consent especially since I had already transferred ownership to her but she was unaware of that detail when she returned home the sign would be the first thing she noticed I changed the locks on the house to make it feel less like a

residence selected certain photos from her trip including explicit stills from the video taken beneath Frank's door and compiled a copy of the Pi's report I left all of this on the dining room table to ensure she was aware that her actions had been uncovered most of my belongings had already been moved by the movers who would store them until I was ready I only carried two suitcases my briefcase laptop and guitar with me my guitar was a must I couldn't entrust something so precious to anyone else while Frank might be involved with my wife I

cherished my guitar deeply my initial plan was to depart the next morning knowing she wouldn't return until later that night night this way I'd be long gone when she arrived however I had a change of heart the night before I wanted her to experience the pain right away while she could only wait and worry until her return I sent her an email containing three carefully chosen photos of her and Frank along with the words divorce you I divorce you I divorce you I opted for one photo where they were nearly intimate on the Dance Floor

clearly showing she wasn't wearing her engagement and wedding rings the second image captured them walking into his dorm room while holding hands the third was a screenshot from the dorm room video showcasing her face clearly I anticipated she would see these images and hoped it would tarnish her final romantic night with Frank as they frantically searched for cameras that were already removed subsequently I turned off my phone leaving the house that had been our family home for countless years was a mix of pain uncertainty and new found Freedom it felt like the most challenging uncertain

and liberating moment of my life all at once in essence my wife was gone from my life I didn't know the when or the why but it was as if she had died even if I hadn't caused it myself the woman who resembling my wife was a stranger to me someone I didn't recognize and didn't wish to reconnect with I was embarking on a fresh start facing an unknown path ahead amidst the Deep sense of loss there was an odd sense of Liberation the weight of Deceit betrayal and belittlement was lifted off my shoulders if

only temporarily the only cost was that half of my life was now inaccessible though it was late my mind was racing so I drove for about 100 Mil along the quiet Highway lost in thought until I found a hotel for the night I wasn't looking for a chain hotel I wanted a genuine local breakfast place I sought something authentic eventually I found it and savored what could be my last plate of grits for a considerable while as I savored those Grits my thoughts shifted and I began to reconsider my journey to Maine this marked the

start of my fresh beginning and I had a lengthy Drive ahead of me I could speed up my trip to Maine escaping my problems but I had a two-e window before work started why hurry I required time to calm my thoughts come to grips with her betrayal and leave the past behind I chose to take it slow relishing the scenery during my Northbound drive and engaging with each state and its residents as I passed through this week would be my transition from my old life to my new one I intended to pamper my senses including

my taste buds to cleanse myself of the ugliness and mistakes of my past and get ready for a fresh start the rest of the day was spent wandering around Williamsburg amidst the summer crowds I explored the talents of skilled Artisans and Craftsmen despite not having a reservation I managed to find a place to stay it wasn't until after a light dinner and settling in for the night that my thoughts returned to my my failed marriage around that time she was likely returning home I wondered how she'd react upon seeing the for sale sign on the

front yard and realizing her keys no longer open the door the next day I headed north and drove along the back roads toward Anapolis Maryland's capital I passed through small towns and historic plantations along Virginia's ancestral Rivers like the York ranic and pomac which flow into the Chesapeake Bay there was a single stretch of road ahead leading me toward my future I would follow that Meandering path as it guided me away from betrayal and toward a fresh chapter in my life update 4 I sat in my hotel room in downtown Annapolis and I finally powered

on my cell phone as expected it was filled with numerous Mist calls emails and text messages most of them were from Karen while a few came from friends I read and listened to all of them even though it was tough it was a necessary step initially Karen was attempting to convince me that things weren't as they appeared yeah right those were the messages she sent from Illinois before she returned home and saw the rest of the photos and read the Pi's report meanwhile my friends were informing me that Karen was reaching out to everyone in

a bid to locate me little did she know she was looking in all the wrong places Jake and his wife were aware but I chose to keep the others in the dark intentionally I would let them know once I had settled I was already aware that I couldn't continue being a ghost forever the two calls that got me concerned were from my daughters Karen had contacted them in an attempt to find out my whereabouts I had purposely not told them about my decision to leave their mother as I wanted to do it face to face

however I couldn't let them worry so I spoke with my daughters and calmly explained the situation to them they were upset and found it hard to believe that their mom could do such a thing so I sent them the same pictures I had sent Karen the night I left home along with a Pi's report for them to read after that they pledged not to inform their mother about my actions there was one more missed call my lawyer informed me that Karen had been officially served with divorce papers now she knew I meant business he also

shared that Frank's wife had received a complete set of photos videos and audio recordings from his six- we Workshop that was a dose of karma for Frank on the third day of my journey I drove through northern Maryland and with a lot of excitement I finally reached New Jersey well not exactly I crossed into New Jersey but didn't stop until I had reached Connecticut once in Connecticut I took a few hours to explore some historic towns along the coast I didn't have a specific goal but the architecture was so distinct from what I was used

to in North Carolina that I felt a strong sense of being in a new place both physically and emotionally and don't tell the government but I spent an hour in Gren trying to spot as many submarines as I could those black fish are quite stealthy while gazing along the shore I was reminded that when they refuel those nuclear submarines they cut a hole in the hole to refuel the reactor and then weld the hle back together was that a metaphor for my situation could Karen's betrayal which tore a hole in my heart be the first

step in re-energizing my life could I heal myself once I embarked on my new Journey as I woke up the next day I knew it would be the most challenging day so far after a hearty breakfast of eggs bacon toast and a strong cup of black coffee I braced myself for a difficult conversation ation with my eldest daughter Claire in brown the drive there didn't take long and I arrived at her dorm around late morning we decided to delay our conversation a bit so that she could pretend to be cheerful for an hour or two

she showed me around the campus and then took me to the cafeteria where she introduced me to her friends they were exactly the kind of young men and women I had hoped she would be surrounded by they were friendly attentive and seemed to provide Mutual support on our way out I took cla's roommate aside and informed her that CLA was going to have a tough day I asked her to look after my daughter she replied of course Mr Baker she shared with us last night we're all here for her yes my daughter had chosen her

friends wisely Claire and I spent hours in her dorm room having a long conversation I shared with her photographs and played audio recordings that I never expected to share with one of my children her emotions shifted between sadness and anger I can't believe mom would do that is she even the same person who raised us what kind of disgusting person has she turned into I had to intervene at that point even though I understood her sentiment Claire regardless of what she's done she's still your mother and remember it's me she's betrayed not you sorry Dad

but she shattered my only family this is absolutely affecting me I couldn't dispute that throughout the afternoon we continued our conversation and I outlined my plans to her I encouraged her to gather her friends and we went out for dinner at the best place in town or at least the best within my budget it seemed like everyone enjoyed a break from the usual dining hall food I shared stories of my own College dining experiences and I think I think it gave them a newfound appreciation for their current situation I stayed at a local hotel that

night and the next morning I had breakfast with CLA held her in a tearful hug and then headed north to Boston to repeat the process Claire must have informed Denise as her reaction was much more composed than her older sisters there was still disappointment and anger but less surprise she requested to see the evidence and I showed her coincidentally her mother called while we were talking and I gave her the universal sign for no I'm not here I shook my head gestured frantically and mimicked a throat throat cutting motion she understood Denise was always the

more level-headed one in the family then she did something I thought I'd never witness she said dad called last night didn't he is it true you've become a woman who cheats on her husband and lies about it becoming involved with multiple partners I was taken aack I wanted to scold her for speaking to her mother like that but at the same time I couldn't deny the truth in her words you heard me Mom you spent 6 weeks being involved with someone else while Dad was alone at home was it worth it mom was is it

worth losing your marriage over wow my daughter has quite the way with words note to self don't get on her bad side there wasn't much more to discuss Denise informed me that her mother was mostly in tears and attempting to offer excuses but my daughter wasn't buying any of it later I took Denise and her friends to a Thai restaurant called The Elephant Walk not far from campus just like her sister Denise had chosen her friends wisely and dinner was a pleasant affair on our way back to campus one of her friends said Mr Baker

Denise told us about what you're going through she was really upset last night but we supported her maybe you could visit us again and we'll treat you to the cafeteria that elicited laughter from the group I mean well actually maybe we can find a better place than that this sparked more giggles and we laughed all the way back to her dorm I found a place to stay for the night had breakfast with my daughter in the morning and on the seventh day of my journey I continued heading North I departed Boston and found myself just

2 hours south of Portland my focus had shifted from my soon to be ex-wife to my daughters they were growing into strong principled young women and I couldn't be prouder of them I now realized they would navigate the upcoming divorce better than I had anticipated The Challenge on this day was leaving these two amazing gems behind with no certainty of when I'd see them again as it turned out my worries were unnecessary I wasn't prepared to confront the reality of starting my new life just yet so when I reached Portsmouth New Hampshire I turned West

and drove towards the White Mountains and the presidential range I entered the White Mountains and took the Cog Railway up to the summit of Mount Washington standing there gazing at across the expanse to the smaller peaks of the White Mountains and surveying the green pine forests below feeling the cold Arctic winds that seemed out of place in the early days of August I finally sensed a rebirth Within Myself I was alone but at last I was standing tall I had gone through a transformation leaving behind the challenges and regrets of my old life and now

I was ready to embrace the new chapter and all its potential I stood on Higher Ground prepared to embark on a fresh Journey everything I desired lay ahead the next morning I ordered a plate of pancakes topped with real maple syrup I I was in maple syrup country now and that would be the case for years to come feeling rested and eager I got back into my car and drove to Portland I arrived in the midafternoon so I decided to touch Bass with my new boss to let them know I had made it I was

already acquainted with about half of the office staff and I received a warm welcome it felt reassuring they were the first cheerful uncomplicated faces I had encountered in a week my new boss Henry gathered the office for introductions I had a quick tour of the workplace but not before everyone agreed on where we would all go for dinner I assumed it would be a downtown restaurant but to my surprise we ended up at Henry's house grilling steaks and enjoying all the accompaniments I know I should have savored lobster in Maine but there was no rush

for that this was more about reintegrating into society while enjoying some exceptionally good stakes and truly outstanding local beer they inquired about my story what was a guy from the south doing uprooting his life and moving to Maine at this stage so I shared my tale I omitted the graphic details but provided enough for them to understand I concluded with a small request I might get a bit short tempered in the next few weeks it's not my usual demeanor but I have a lot to process I hope that if I act out you'll call me

out and tell me to cool it I could use some gentle push back now and then unexpectedly Every Woman there hugged me and gave me a peck on the cheek while every man put an arm around my shoulder we're here for you AB that's all they said and all they needed to say later that night as I settled into my hotel room I powered up my cell phone once again both of my daughters had sent supportive texts they must have shared my number with their friends because I had received about eight or 10 additional texts

from the young men and women who appreciated the dinner and wanted me to know they'd be there for my daughters those kids are truly wonderful a number of friends continued reaching out so I made the decision to connect with all of them and explain the situation so they could stop fretting I didn't reveal my location that would come later I simply told them why I had left despite their initial reluctance to believe I sent them the same three photos I'd sent Karen and informed them that I had even more incriminating evidence if they needed further

convincing I pondered it but honestly I couldn't find a single reason to Shield her from her own choices I had tried and it hadn't worked so let the truth come out in due time I received messages of love and support from each of them and I assured them I would stay in touch it was becoming increasingly apparent that my Notions of becoming a ghost were just wishful thinking too many people cared about me and that's certainly a positive thing I went through the remaining text messages from Karen and listened to the missed calls eventually she

came clean and confessed though her confession was mixed with strange bursts of anger she managed to blame me one way or another for her actions and for everything that had unfolded well that's just ridiculous I sent her a text saying I'd call her the next day around noon it had to happen sooner or later let's just say the conversation was far from satisfying she swung between blame guilt and denial she was sorry Frank's influence was strong over her I was suffocating her it was my fault because I worked too much she even had the audacity

to claim that nothing serious happened between them they were just messing around I almost burst out laughing when she tried to convince me she was only searching for her creative inspiration she went so far as to accuse me of turning our daughters against her as if her own actions hadn't accomplished that without any assistance from me when she finally fell silent I laid it out for her in a straightforward manner she had conspired with Frank to betray me resisted my efforts to salvage our relationship carried out the Betrayal and now she was facing the consequences

I no longer cared about the wise when I hung up she was still crying and pleading her case I was done with her there was no turning back I Knew Too Much I located a simple yet comfortable two-bedroom apartment in an older building conveniently close to the office I thought I could use the exercise from walking and initially considered it a temporary Arrangement but my perspective quickly shifted living simply in town avoiding the extra responsibilities that come with owning a house and having a small coastal cottage for weekends seemed like a good plan then I

thought why stop at a cottage I could get a boat keep it docked in the harbor and that could be my Seaside retreat by the time I sorted all of this out it was early fall I thought I'd lead a solitary life but it hasn't turned out that way I actually spend more time with my daughters now than when I lived in Raleigh they come up for a weekend every month often bringing friends along during those 36 hours my apartment buzzes with activity and I usually treat them to dinner once they're gone I do crave

the quiet although I miss them as soon as they leave surprisingly a few of my friends have visited and the rest plan to come when the weather's better I'm living alone but I don't feel lonely I've made new friends at work and through my Adventures the Sailing Community is Lively and inclusive and I've met intriguing women however I'll stay respectful and well behaved until the divorce is finalized even though the divorce will be official soon Karen still reaches out to me she never truly repents and prefers to downplay the situation all she says is everyone

does it it doesn't mean anything but it does the intimacy carries weight and the deceit and manipulation matter even more I thought about explaining this to her but people change and I no longer see the point truthfully my life isn't fully separate from hers with two daughters and many Mutual friends complete Detachment is unlikely nevertheless with 600 mil between us I no longer live with the daily pain of rejection and betrayal she used to be the center of my life until I was no longer in hers now I'm forging my own path and creating my

own future several positive outcomes emerged from the situation to begin with I genuinely enjoy living up here I'm going through my first main winter which is a bit of a shock but if others can handle it so can I the early darkness in this region actually makes indoor Gatherings feel Cozier and brighter I've started searching for a boat and found a place with Moorings not too far from town so I'm looking forward to spring when I can work on splicing lines and applying varnish the local restaurants are good the micro breweries are fantastic and the

people are authentic there's a variety of Music dances to learn like Contra dancing and I'm still discovering surprises I believe life will turn out well for me after all is my heart fully healed not yet but time has its way of healing wounds and I'm confident in the better life that lies ahead oh and as a side note Frank wife seems to be as old-fashioned as I am she kicked him out of the house and divorced him what's even worse both Karen and Frank are still unpublished