hello and welcome to Lost Love Chronicles I was half asleep in our bed when she spoke softly to me it was a little louder than a whisper barely louder than the rain outside I almost disregarded what she said altogether as I was peacefully slipping off into a satisfying Slumber but then a few seconds after the words left her mouth and hung in the air I finally heard her it nearly shook me awake what did you just say Claire in the darkness I heard her take a deep breath and sigh sadly her hands SL slowly reached
next to her and turned the switch on the bedside lamp cascading our bedroom with light then she turned over and laid on her back her eyes stared at the ceiling above us avoiding mine altogether I'm unhappy Frank she repeated quietly as if she regretted having to say it unhappy that got my attention that word spoken in a soft reluctant tone is always part of a deeper message it is never just a word that comes alone it is like a scout scoping out the territory to see if it is is vulnerable for attack it will soon
be accompanied by an army ready to devastate the land you're unhappy what does that mean I rolled over to face her to get a good look at my wife I saw her eyes start to glisten with unshed tears she didn't back at me her stair stayed fixed on the ceiling above I'm not happy with us with you sticks and stones may break my bones but words will never hurt me is a famous aphorism that kids say most of us have used it at some time in our childhood when another kid tried to torture Us in
verbal Warfare the truth is that phrase is used as a bomb to cover the hurt that words actually cause us it makes us feel like the words never touched us but if the words never touched us we would never feel the need to say it the words that Claire just said to me touched me like a sharp blade touches soft skin tears started welling up in her eyes and slipping down her cheek she still wasn't looking at me but I was staring intently at her the face that I'd found so beautiful for the past 11
years years was filled with such agonizing pain at this moment I would have felt the need to comfort her if the pain in my heart didn't Eclipse anything that she felt at the moment you are unhappy being married to me is that what you're saying she didn't answer me she just sniffled but her silence and the fact that she didn't recant her words spoke volumes I don't think there is a way to aptly describe the torent of Agony that consumes you when the person that you thought you'd grow old with tells you that she isn't
happy being with you why are you unhappy I asked trying to remain calm but the cracks in my voice betrayed that in truth I was on the verge of breaking down at any moment tears continued to stream down her face and into her pillow she was still looking up at the ceiling and avoiding my eyes I don't know Frank I just am you don't know why you're unhappy that sounds like Claire I spit at her I was beginning to let the pain give way to anger which was much easier to control and redirect I saw
her Flinch at my words as more tears started to fall all she didn't say anything more so what does this mean you want to leave me to leave us huh is that what you're trying to tell me silence I actually expected her to burst out and vehemently deny wanting to leave me to claim that she still loved me but just needed to work through some things but she didn't she let the silence answer for her I don't know if any words could have hurt as much as her silence anyway like there was nothing left to
say I answered the stab to my heart with Venom and rage I snatched the comforter off and jumped out of bed like it was on fire CLA finally turned her head and looked at me Frank please try to understand understand what Claire that my wife doesn't love me anymore and wants to leave me I think I understand perfectly I never said that I didn't love you Frank I just said that I was unhappy I knew backpedaling when I heard it I wasn't letting her off the hook so you want to stay married to me she
hesitated a moment like she was searching for the right words to say however the only right words were the ones that said she wanted to stay married to me she shouldn't have had to search for those words any response but an immediate one is the wrong answer I don't know what I want that was all that she came up with we just looked at each other the only thing that was between us was a thousand unsaid words the memories of our lives our children our love seem to fade into the ether as the new reality
descended on us at least that is what it felt like to me it seemed like this reality was already present for her and had been for a while yes yes you do you want a divorce I said after a moment of nothingness the words choked in my throat like they didn't want to come up she didn't answer me but she didn't really need to it seemed like she was saying so much with so little words it actually laughed a little when I thought that this was the most efficient use of words that I'd ever seen
efficiency is getting the most of what you can useing as little resources as possible hey I'm an engineer had been for the past 13 years though many would argue that I was one at Birth solving problems and making things work is in my blood even at a time like this I can make connections that relate to building something or improving performance my snort of laughter threw her off a bit she cautiously got out of bed and slowly walked over to where I was honey she started as she reached out for me in an attempt to
comfort me it seemed more like she was trying to Plate me soften the blow of her world shattering Revelation like anything she said or did would make things better I stepped back away from her I wasn't in the mood to ease her guilt don't call me that you don't get to call me honey after you tell me that you want to leave me Claire she gulped and retracted her hands once again avoiding my gaze I didn't say that I'm just trying to explain Frank do you or don't you want to be married to me that
needs no explanation that's a yes or no question so answer it one word yes or no Frank just let me yes or no I interrupted her in my mind any explanation that she could give needs to come only after she gives that answer but she didn't answer she sat there looking at me with tears in her eyes that tells me everything I need to know you don't have to say it the fact that you won't say Yes can only mean no tell me I'm wrong more silence you know what I'm tired I worked 11 hours
today with no lunch break I don't need any explanation about why you suddenly want to leave me why you're so unhappy I need sleep so I'm going to the couch in my office to get some much needed rest we'll talk about this tomorrow her face changed suddenly it morphed from a sullen woman to an angry Banshee she found her voice that was so absent moments ago screw you Frank she exploded her response was so startling that I was taken off guard she was peering into my eyes with a look of determination and frustration I know
you spent 11 hours today at work you want to know what you did when you came home tonight more work you shut yourself in your office like you do every night now you can't even be bothered to talk to me about why I'm unhappy you're saying that you want to leave me what more is there to talk about that's not what I said you didn't deny it either Claire don't mince words with me say what it is that you want you want to know what I want I'll tell you I want to feel loved I
want a man who wants me around who wants to be around me I want to feel sexy with a man who thinks that I'm sexy that is what I want and I don't make you feel that is that what you're saying she once again fell silent I wasn't going to let her her off that easily anymore God toit Claire answer me something hit me suddenly I don't know where it came from but it was there a revelation of sorts a moment when things became illuminated for me she didn't say that she wanted me to make
her feel sexy she said that she wants a man who makes her feel that way does someone else make you feel that way I choked out her face gradually fell until she just broke down in tears then she covered her face in her hands yes she said softly in between sobs the anger and Venom that was there a moment ago was no longer in her voice now it was just sadness my world stopped everything in me ceased living I didn't respond to that I couldn't I just sat there and watched her cry who I asked
finally no answer just more crying who I yelled out jarring her a little she hiccuped in Surprise and then wiped her tears Doug she said softly it's Doug Doug my ex-best friend how cliche is that can words even describe what you feel in that moment there are no adjectives that can aptly explain it no one can come up with any poetic metaphores that can accurately paint a picture of the depths of Despair that you sink to when you find out that your wife and your best friend had betrayed you both chose someone else over you
to make matters worse they chose each other this magnifies the Betrayal tfold the pain that is a result of that betrayal is also magnified pain that's the only word that fits no other can suffice even if synonyms fail to match what this knowledge does to you I wanted to respond but I couldn't there was so much to say yet all of it meant nothing so many questions flooded to my mouth along with accusations threats and simple words like cheating and 304 but nothing came out I did the only thing I could do I left I
just stopped out of the room and left her there as I descended the stairs to my impromptu bed Chambers in my office which was located next to the living room I closed the door with a slam shutting myself in I momentarily bassed in the safety of solitude but that safe feeling was a fallacy because I wasn't truly alone the pain had accompanied me I heard footsteps descending the stairs and I knew that it was CLA following me I quickly got up and locked the door to my office I couldn't speak to her I didn't trust
myself I had never hit her but tonight threatened to shatter that record this lock was protecting both of us from me the doorknob rattled as she tried to open the door when she failed she knocked persistently while she called out my name I continued to ignore her still not trusting myself the pain was speaking to me telling me to do horrible things to her it was painting horrific pictures in my head of my wife intertwined with Doug the moans the laughs the sex she finally gave up with a sigh after about 10 minutes and went
back upstairs I was finally blessed with peace and quiet so I tried to make the most of it by getting the sleep I so desperately needed unfortunately getting that much needed rest was easier said said than done the couch was comfortable enough and not at all unfamiliar I'd fallen asleep on this thing many nights when I had a problem that I had to solve and didn't want to keep Clare up the problem that I was having now was that my mind just wouldn't be quiet I was plagued with thoughts of my wife falling out of
love with me and in love with Doug the realization that she didn't want a life with me kept looping over and over when did this happen we still how did I miss the signs my mind thought back playing and replaying interactions that I'd had with my wife I was trying to find a point in time when the love started to fade a moment that things began to shift there has to be something scanning our years together I couldn't find anything nothing Monumental enough to explain how we'd gotten so off track everything had been the same
as it had always been in stories like this usually the man can go back and see a pattern of the wife declining sex and affection however with us there was no declining sex life we still made love a couple of times a week I mean sure there were no fireworks or anything like that but that's normal right there was a time when we were crazy kids newlyweds who couldn't stand to be a part for a single moment but Life Changes people relationships mature priorities change that's life my question was when had Doug weasel his way
into the mix I'd known Doug for nearly 13 years he was my friend before I met and married CLA at one time we worked for the same company in fact we both started working there together there are outgoing people who are popular everywhere they go they can make friends at the drop of a dime I wasn't like that I don't make many friends in fact for me to even call someone a friend is a leap Doug was my friend Claire was my wife who was also my friend emphasis on was it wasn't that I was
socially inept it's just that I don't meet many people that I have that kind of connection with I have work Associates that I'm fond of my assistant Sarah for example is one person who's been very instrumental to my life I admire her and find her refreshing to be around but still even with all of that I wouldn't consider her a friend I was an only child growing up I learned to get along without needing daily contact with other people that Independence followed me into adulthood but not needing many friends doesn't mean that a person doesn't
want any like I said Doug and I once worked side by side we were working together for years before I was promoted and became his boss there wasn't any jealousy or anything at least not as far as I could tell we still occasionally hung out when we could unfortunately my promotion came at the cost of a drastic reduction of my free time our friendship still strived but it definitely took a hit I wasn't really aware of how much of a hit it took until tonight the strain became even greater when he was offered job with
another company it came with a promotion for him so it was a no-brainer as to whether or not he would take it I was happy for him but sad to see him go one thing about Doug was that he wasn't like me when it came to engineering he was smart as hell but he wasn't as dedicated to his job as I was he enjoyed making good money as did I but he didn't find the same joy in building that I found for him it was just a job he was able to do it and go
home when he left the lab and went home he didn't even like talking about work me I was the opposite I loved building things things that were already built I loved figuring them out so I could make them better even when I was out with my wife and kids at family gatherings or restaurants I found time to Doodle small impromptu schematics on napkins and other things Doug and I were interns when we started I was accepted for a year-long internship that only had 12 slots when the internship was over there were two open jobs available
May the best man or woman wi I instantly liked Doug and I don't like many people I felt a kinship with him during our internship we helped each other out each of weeded out the competition until we were the last two standing I would love to say that we did it ethically but I'd be lying when you are competing for a job that starts out at 80k a year good guys really do finish last don't let Disney tell you any different there was one in turn who was a threat to us his name was Donald
it was down to us three since there were only two jobs available we knew there was a chance that one of us wouldn't make it Donald was smarter than both of us and we needed him gone in fact he had a design for a propulsion system that would have certainly knocked one of us out of the race so we stole it we got him drunk one night under the guise of friendship stole his designs emailed it to Doug and sabotaged his laptop to be sure that he didn't save it anywhere else on it then we
took every CD and flash drive in his room hoping against hope that we got any backups the plan was to make sure he couldn't wow anyone with his design then once we were assured that he was safely out of the way Doug would email his schematics back to him it worked without his designs he didn't have a leg up on us better still he threw a hissy fit and disqualified himself he attacked us in full view of everybody while Doug and I played the innocent victims after Donald was gone there were no questions as to
who got the two job slots I met CLA after I'd finished my internship and had been officially working for the company for a year Doug and I had been friends at this point for 2 years I won't get into how we met or give ad naam details about our courtship it seems irrelevant at this point we met I thought she was beautiful asked her out and we married a year later had been married for the past 10 years we even have two girls Stacy 8 and Kelly five Doug was over my house more than his
own I wouldn't go as far as to say that he was a permanent fixture but if I woke up in the morning and saw him going through my refrigerator I would simply ask him if he made coffee thinking about Doug coming over to my house did put more puzzle pieces together he started coming over less and less I couldn't exactly tell you the time frame of when things began to slowed down I wasn't even thinking about it at the time to take notice if I had to give a guesstimation I would say that it started
a little over 6 months ago his appearance at my house started to become sparse he didn't act any differently with me he just stopped coming by as unexpectedly is that somehow connected the clock above my desk ticked away the seconds those seconds turned into minutes which seamlessly morphed into hours time seemed irrelevant like its span was infinite yet it passed within the blink of an eye before I knew it sunlight was trying to fight its way through the curtains I'd literally not slept a wink all night I groaned as I contemplated getting up to go
to the bathroom I finally decided that if I didn't go now the choice could possibly be taken out of my hands I finally gave into nature and trudged to the bathroom when I was done I went back to my office and thought about calling in sick I wasn't in any type of mood to work today I just slipped back underneath the blanket when I heard my alarm going off upstairs it would have awakened me and told me that it was time to start my day had I been sound asleep in the warmth of my own
bed next to my wife I heard it stop suddenly which let me know that CLA had silenced it I laid there not sure what was to come next then I heard rustling around upstairs followed by her footsteps on each stair as she descended them a few seconds later there was a knock on the door Frank are you awake I choose to ignore her immature I know but I wanted her to go away so I fainted sleep smashing my face into the cushion I heard the door Creak open and listened to her step inside of my
office I mentally kicked myself for leaving it unlocked when I got back from the bathroom Frank I know you're awake I've laid next to you for 10 years I know how you look when you're sleeping what do you want Claire I asked the pillow obstructing my mouth somewhat I didn't even turn to face her just checking on you I was worried about you I snorted at that she was worried about me after she ripped my heart out of my chest she was worried about me I'm fine go away I didn't hear retreating footsteps which meant
that the was still standing there half of me wanted to find something heavy to launch at her the other half just wanted to ignore her Frank we need to talk about this I think things got all messed up last night I finally sat up and turned to her she looked like she hadn't any more luck catching that elusive creature called sleep than I did I took a strange comfort in that what things got messed up Claire you've been cheating on me with my best friend and now you want to leave me that is the gist
of it isn't it Frank do you want to be married to me Claire huh she started to fidget nervously it's not that simple Frank forgive me but I couldn't for the life of me find a simpler question it didn't even require an explanation all it needed was a yes or no response what the hell is complex about it Claire either you want to be Mrs Underwood or you don't how much simpler could it be if you just let me explain the tiny footsteps of Kelly and Stacy were heard coming down the stairs putting this conversation
on hold a silent message of we'll finish this later pass between us as we greeted our girls and began the morning ritual of preparing them for their day we didn't speak anymore about the humongous elephant in the room at least not with words we glanced at each other over our daughter's heads trying to gauge the others mindset but soon the responsibilities of the day put that conversation further on hold as we began to make our preparations to conquer the world as if on autopilot our family showered dressed and parted ways for the day I decided
to go to work I didn't want to be alone with Claire once the girls left for school not yet that conversation could wait as I drove over to my job my mind was a whirlwind of questions add that to the lack of sleep that I was suffering from and one could say that today was prepping to be a shitty day however once I pulled into my parking space at my job all other things ceased CLA faded into the background I felt nothing from my sleep deprivation suddenly my mind burst into formulas about our current engine
problems my company was on the verge of creating a new kind of engine it would have significantly more productivity than its predecessors the horsepower would be increased drastically but it would be able to do so at greater fuel efficiency our company stood to make a lot of money on this project the only problem was we were on the verge of getting it perfect but not close enough in the end the engine failed every test I mentally made a note of the calibrations that would have to be made Thomas my intern met me by the door
with a fresh cup of coffee like he did every morning just waiting to kiss my butt and show me why he was smarter than the rest of the interns I like Thomas because he reminds me of myself when I was an intern Mr Underwood glad you're here I have some thoughts on why the engine is failing I tried to call you last night but your wife said that you couldn't be disturbed I left a message for you with her but you never returned my call did you get it the last thing I needed was to
think about CLA right now I needed to stay focused even the mention of her name set off ripples in my pond doesn't matter Thomas I'm here now what's the situation well I was trying to explain to your wife stop throwing rocks in my pwn Thomas that the new engine keeps failing because there are things that we didn't account for we keep trying to compensate but nothing is working increasing the output works for a while but it keeps failing because we can't keep it cool enough I think we need to focus Less on raising the horsepower
and more on finding another way to cool it he beamed proudly like he just solved the mystery for us stupid interns I had to fight the urge to laugh at him he was smart hell he was practically a genius but we all were top of his class 4.0 average blah blah blah that basically describes everyone here you couldn't get in the door unless you had that at a minimum there was nothing he could figure out that we hadn't already thought of still you have to keep the interns motivated we work the dogs at out of
them for practically nothing so you have to give them a cookie every once in a while good work Thomas we'll look into that theory we're already looking into that had been for weeks but no need to burst his bubble Thomas once again smiled broadly practically panting with his tongue out and wagging his tail he enjoyed his doggy treat I almost patted him on the head here are the new projected specs for today's trial runs he handed me the paper with the latest readout the numbers looked impressive of course they always look impressive on paper okay
Thomas tell the others I'll be down to the lab in a second he started to Scurry down the hallway but then he stopped and turned around boss is everything okay at home Mrs Underwood sounded a little everything's fine I cut him off abruptly he looked at me with concern but saw no room for discussion on my face with the last rock removed from his hands he silently accepted that any mention of the wife was off limits he nodded his head and continued to head to the lab I stopped by assistant's desk to see if I
had any meeting scheduled Sarah gave me a brief rundown of what I had to do everything was part of a standard day except for a meeting that I had with the heads that's what we call the big wigs the ones who made all of the decisions for the company the department heads needed constant reassurance of their importance to the company so we provided it to them by giving them occasional progress reports on our projects I always dreaded these meetings every one of them was an interrogation by the higher-ups asking stupid questions that they really didn't
want the answer to they only wanted to hear that everything was perfect if there wasn't any progress they wanted to know why but I couldn't tell them why without going into an explanation of the problems that we were trying to overcome that explanation was a technical one full of big words that they didn't care about the only words that they knew about were words like profit margin and bottom line each time we had to go into development of a new product this was the dance we all knew it we all hated it after I had
my day outlined for me I thanked Sarah she looked at me worriedly for a moment Mr Underwood you okay damn it I wished everyone would stop asking me that I'm fine Sarah just going through some things at home I'll be fine you want to talk about it she asked looking genuinely concerned I I didn't want to be a dick especially not to her but I absolutely did not want to talk about it no I said simply it was abrupt but it sent my message clearly she read my tone nodded her head briefly and left it
at that I went about my day I had the meeting with the heads which went about as well as I thought it would after that I was back in the lab for the remainder of the day and I mean that literally it was dark outside when I finally punched in the code to unlock my car and pushed the start button I barely heard the engine word Al life it purred softly as my car beeped to let me know that I had to buckle my seat belt this is the way an engine is supposed to sound
or not sound I know that the manly man will tell you that loud powerful muscle engines are what it's all about massive machines that bark and growl when they are stopped at a red light causing all of the Lesser cars to shrivel in their monstrous presence one step of the gas pedal causes a screeching commotion as it is propelled forward roaring loudly and leaving smoke and burnt rubber in its wake but for me that's not what it is about I like luxury engines the strong silent type the ones that can reach 100 mph in seconds
with barely a whisper these cars don't need to announce their presence to the world they just show up shiny and Sleek women get wet just sitting on the passenger side as the soft seats massage their buttocks muscle cars will get a guy's attention luxury cars will get a woman's attention have you ever seen an advertisement for an Ashton Martin or a Tesla probably not you don't need to know the price or what its stats are if you do then you are in the wrong place just being able to sit in one increases your status a
man's car is an extension of himself muscle cars are all about the show showing the world how masculine you are luxury cars are all about the wealth a person can buy a Mustang or a challenger and park it right outside of his apartment people who buy brand new BMWs porches Etc Park them in their driveway most of the time right next to their spouse's luxury car that is what it is about I know I sound superficial but you have to understand I didn't have money growing up my dad was a mechanic my mom worked at
Walmart we weren't broke by normal standards but the high school that I went to was located in an area that was wealthy these kids weren't quite private school rich but most of them had at least one parent with a name accompanied by a brief description of their education doctor attorney at law PhD Etc these kids had material things that they took for granted their wardrobe consisted of expensive clothes made by gay men whose names were dropped with awe most of them were giv cars on their 16th birthday I'm not talking about a beater I'm talking
about cars that grown men with full-time jobs will probably never own any problem they ran into was fixed with a phone call to Mommy and Daddy me I didn't have it like that my clothes were ordinary my first car was a neon and I worked at Best Buy for that so while I wasn't poor I might as well have been on welfare in comparison my Saving Grace was that I was smarter than 95% of the school the other 5% were paid to be there I studied hard I never made lower than ab and even that
was in gym I worked my butt off because I swore that I would have the life that I was denied my kids would be one of the envied my kids just thinking about them made me remember what was waiting for me at home my family my wife my unhappy wife I drove home in morbid silence no longer able to hide out behind work I was forced to replay the conversation of last night I didn't make Claire feel sexy but someone else did Doug did I Can't Describe what I felt thinking about that last night I
was full of anger and hurt now a part of me was numb I was feeling a bit detached I'd spent all day at work avoiding it I was no longer able to do that the Silence of my drive home forced me to dwell on it everything seemed sort of abstruse I dreading the confrontation that awaited me yet I needed it to happen I didn't know what to expect when I walk through my front door would my wife be packed and ready to leave with her new lover would she be be waiting with divorce papers would
they be but naked and screwing on my living room couch or would she simply pretend like nothing happened when finally walked through the front door of my house it was sort of anticlimactic the girls were eating cookies in the living room Stacy was doing her homework and Kelly was coloring in a book my wife was sitting on the couch on her laptop in front of them our 65in TV idly showed an episode of SpongeBob hi Daddy Stacy said as she briefly looked up from her homework Kelly continued to concent on her coloring like she was
solving a complex calculus problem Claire looked up from her laptop with a look of trepidation she seemed to be trying to gauge my mood hi honey how was work she asked in an attempt to sound normal I'm guessing it was for the girl's sake which was why I let the honey go for the moment it was work I replied with no inflection I was going to play along for now but I wasn't going to pretend like nothing happened she nodded slightly as if she were accepting the terms of our ceasefire I made you a plate
it's in the microwave it probably tasted better when it was warm but you weren't here when we ate I caught the tone in her voice when she said the last part I wasn't here is that what she wanted to lead with was that her excuse for doing whatever she did with my best friend well I had a long day at work have to make the money for my family I returned the look on her face was one of someone biting their tongue She had a lot more to say so did I but we couldn't not
without alerting the girls for now our ceasefire prevented us from getting on with the war but it was coming so are we finally going to talk about this CLA asked when the girls were in bed I was sitting in my office going over things on my laptop her voice came from behind me I swiveled my chair around until I was facing her standing in my doorway okay fine I said as I let out a breath she entered and closed the door behind her then she found her way to the couch that was my temporary bed
I just want to start out by saying that I'm sorry the last thing I want is to hurt you it's just that things have been crazy for a while now I just I don't know what to say why don't you start with telling me about you and Doug I said with surprising calmness Frank I don't want to hear how sorry you are or about how you didn't want to hurt me that does nothing for me if you want to help me you need to start by talking now tell me about your goddamn relationship with my
ex-best friend the anger was starting to rise strangely enough I was a little relieved to feel it for a minute I felt like some emotionless robot I was beginning to get worried it started a year ago she said on the verge of tears I leaned back in my seat allowing her room to continue I mean Doug has always been there for me so I guess it started more than a year ago but I didn't start looking at him like that until about a year ago you were gone so much especially after you got that promotion
I started to feel overwhelmed with having to do everything by myself all of the nights you were gone and the days that you just weren't available she shot me an accusatory glance but then looked away then she continued Doug started helping me around the house listening to me he would come over just to talk he was sweet the had the nerve to turn her lips up in a nostalgic smile like the memories that she was reliving were sweet the simmering anger in me started to heat up at that her voice switched back from sweet and
wistful to hard and bitter he even took me out a couple of times like the time you were supposed to take me out on my birthday but forgot her eyes looked like steel at that point before that sentence she looked sort of remorseful but when she said that she took on a defiant look now I was pissed oh okay I'm sorry you're right Claire I forgot your birthday well you sure showed me I forget your birthday you screw my best friend I guess that makes us even right we didn't have sex that night for your
information that night was spent with me crying about how my husband never wants to be around me he just listened do you hear that he listened to me so tell me when did listening turn into sex if you want to use the you forgot my birthday defense as an excuse then you have a long way to go to make that fly she laughed incredulously as she stood up you think this started because you forgot one birthday how about anniversaries date nights get togethers with friends vacations that had to get cancelled or whatever else that got
tossed to the side because it didn't have anything to do with an engine how about all of the nights you were here but not really here she was practically looming over me pointing at me as she spoke now the gloves were off we were getting into our trenches and setting our attacks you never answered the question when did the screwing start I don't know Frank around April I think 6 months ago around the time Doug stopped coming by there's that mystery solved where huh where did the screwing happen in my bed on the couch in
a hotel room yes she responded simply I didn't get the answer at first but then I did the screwing happened in all three places probably happened in many more do you love him my voice cracked as I asked that the feelings of hurt began to flow the anger at her betrayal was nothing compared to the pain I was starting to feel once again I was able to Mas it for a while hiding behind work and Justified anger but now asking that question and needing to know the answer left me open tears began water my eyes
I don't know I think so she said reluctantly as she looked away from me she knew what this was doing to me and she felt bad about it do you still love me another question that left me vulnerable yes but it's not the same not like it used to be not like I should love a husband I finished for her tears streamed down her face as she nodded after that we let the silence fall upon us she walked back over to the couch and sat on it so what do we do now she asked softly
breaking the cold quiet all I could do was sigh and shake my head what do you think we do I asked harshly pain filling my voice I knew what she wanted what she was really asking she wanted me to make this okay to give her my blessing to find happiness with Doug or whatever she was going to do but she wasn't going to get that I was not going to make it easy for her I refus to swallow the bile of rejection and suck it up just to clear her conscience screw her and the Doug
she rode in on you want to leave you want to end this marriage fine you do it you go find a lawyer and serve me divorce papers you move out of the house and find a shitty apartment you explain to the kids why this family is breaking up you take the initiative I'm not doing a goddamn thing you started this train wreck you finish it Frank don't Frank me screw you Claire what did you think I was going to say I hope you find happiness I'm sorry for forgetting your birthday I wish I could have
been a better husband what did you think would happen when you walked your cheating but into this office the words that I said stung her they hit her right in the heart just as they were intended to her face fell as more tears started to drop but she held her chin up with eyes glistening with tears she looked at me and said I didn't know what to expect Frank maybe is having a talk working through some things figuring things out like adults but honestly I don't expect much from you anymore adults you stinking don't talk
about being adults adults talk when there is a problem they don't go out of their marriage and open their legs for sex and then come back and say they are not happy so my dear beloved wife you have nothing that covers your acts of cheating now get out of here before I start talking in a different language a language that you may not like with that final note she disappeared from my office if my life were anything like the stories I would have been served papers the next day then there would be a brief few
paragraphs about the term settlements then the next scene would flash by and one of us would be moved out and getting on with our pathetic existence if only it were that easy CLA did find a lawyer about a week later if you think the fact that she found a lawyer was painful for me trying living with the knowledge that she was actively looking for one watching her on her laptop with an intense stare on her face scrolling through searches and watching her stop at one and click then moments later she would shoot me an uncomfortable
look and leave the room grabbing her cell phone with her I conceded to the fact that she was serious and I began to search for a lawyer myself it was Sarah my assistant who pointed me in the direction of Terren Ross our company had a law firm on retainer and he was the lawyer assigned us he mostly kept us from getting sued and operating within this side of the law at least on paper he wasn't a divorce lawyer but because he was part of a bigger firm he could give some recommendations and talk to people
on my behalf that would get me someone who could help me I made an appointment and met him at his office once his secretary announced my presence he came out to greet me Mr Underwood nice to see you please come in and take a seat he said as he shook my hand he then guided me into his office and motioned me toward the chair in front of his massive desk I took the seat so what brings us here today he asked as he opened a notebook and took an expensive looking pin from his desk well
Mr Ross my wife is filing for divorce or at least she's going to file she just found a lawyer so I'm sure that it is in the works he nodded his head knowingly as wrote some things down I see well I recently went through a messy divorce myself I know how it feels I nodded his face took on a look of pity but something else was there too he understood so tell me was there infidelity abuse gambling problems yeah I mean no abuse or gambling infidelity she cheated on me hm did she give a reason
why she was unfaithful I snorted a laugh said I worked too much and was never there for her he also snorted a laugh and shook his head been there done that you work hard to give them the life of luxury and it isn't enough honestly I don't know what they want they want a man who is successful yet they want him to always be available to do every little thing they want I sighed and nodded in agreement it was nice to have someone understand what I was feeling so Mr Ross please call me Terry thank
you Terry feel free to call me Frank we do Frank so I guess the only question that I have is what do I do now he sat back in his and I swear an evil sneer came across his face kind of like when a shark smells blood well off the the top of my head I will say that you need to get a list of your assets I'm not telling you to hide the ones that you can but I nodded as he continued the ones that you don't will probably be split between the two of
you like I said I went through that not too long ago but I think the most important thing you need to do is ask yourself what it is that you want out of this divorce do you want to annihilate her or are you just looking to tactically separate and go separate ways he seemed a little too enthusiastic about annihilating her I guess that is what good lawyers are supped to be like Terry and the law firm that he worked for had been on my company's retainer for the longest Terry was the lawyer they assigned to
us for a reason when our company came under Fire they sent him in problems had a tendency to disappear when he got involved what are my choices I asked him he smiled broadly at me like he was waiting for me ask that well Frank as you know I'm not a divorced lawyer mostly I keep your company from being sued as well as handle other things that keeps them spit shined and sparkly clean avoiding things like patent infringement code violations things of that nature but I know of some people who I can refer you to who
I refer you to depends on what you want out of this I can send you the Navy SEAL or the Marine I don't understand I said in confusion he chuckled a bit like he didn't expect me to understand the Navy SEAL as I like to call my colleague Mike is a guy who accomplishes the mission he doesn't kill anything more than what is necessary one shot one kill he is the guy that you send in to resolve things peacefully with with as little Bloodshed as possible he isn't afraid to get his hands dirty but he
makes as little noise as possible have you ever heard about the Navy Seals in the news you won't the only team you've actually heard of was Seal Team 6 and that was only because their target was so Infamous Americans needed to hear about Benin Laden's death if it wasn't for that you wouldn't even know they existed that is Mike get in finish the mission get out he is so good that I've seen the opposing spouse actually thank him for being so nice like he did them a favor but in reality he got his client the
best deal possible he just did it with a smile now Phil heun's a marine Marines are the dirty boys they got kill and annihilate all of those in their path after they're done killing they stick around to make sure it stays dead they don't leave until the war is over because the entire war is their mission Phil will let you know that he is coming to screw you over screw you over and then laugh at your corpse his first tactic is go for the jugular there is no lead up to it no progression I have
never heard of a pleasant divorce where he is concerned I could only nod and wait for him to continue both are good for their purposes neither one is better than the other they just have different missions now if you want someone to resolve the situation do it neatly and not Scorch the Earth doing it I can get you Mike but if you want send your wife crawling away with bloody stumps then I can send you to Phil he seemed to enjoy his analogy it was probably one that he'd given many times before however no matter
how much CLA hurt me I didn't like the image of her crawling away with bloody stumps I'm not sure what I want right now I guess that depends on her I said finally he took a breath as he eyed me with a sort of pity okay Frank I get it believe me when I tell you ending a marriage is hard I've been there his eyes glazed over for a second as if he were remembering his own battle but he shook it off quickly just remember that there is a difference between being patient and procrastinating in
cases like divorce usually the one who isn't scared to strike first is the one who ends up getting what they want when my ex-wife Christine decided that she wanted a divorce I sat around hoping that she would change her mind I started trying to win her back I sent her flowers jewelry poems the works but she was determined in the end I was unprepared and she took me to task if you want wait around to see if she goes with her own seal or the Marine you may find yourself at a disadvantage like I did
don't wait too long before you decide I thanked him and shook his hand as I prepared to leave he walked me to the door of his massive office and ushered me out handing me his card as I left call me when you decide good luck he said as he patted me on the back I left his office feeling worse than I did when I entered when I placed the divorce on Claire's side of the court I put the entire burden of it on her if I'm being honest I secretly hoped that she would realize that
she didn't want it but watching her actually seeking counsel with such fervor made me realize how much she really wanted to be done with with me now sitting on the precipice of my own decision everything seemed so morose did she love me at all had she ever loved me for me sitting in that office speaking with Terry about how much Bloodshed I wanted to end my marriage with was torture it made me pause and really think about what I was doing to my marriage Claire didn't seem to be suffering from the same hesitancy she was
full steam ahead I do recognized the Valiant effort on her part to not be a complete about it but she had no qualms within herself about what she was doing her only obstacle was how it was going to affect me she wanted this divorce she wanted to be rid of me what were my options try to win her back quit my job or start doing the things that my engineer brain is telling me to do the next logical step hiding assets protecting my investments preparing for the inevitable my brain was giving me a to-do list
that was of the utmost importance but I couldn't shake the last vestibule of hope that is what kept me from making a decision in there by waiting for her next move instead of taking the initiative myself I was leaving room for her to change her mind I didn't want to do anything to exacerbate the situation any more than I should if she were on the fence in any way I didn't want my actions to push her over hope it is the quintessential human delusion simultaneously the source of your greatest strength and your greatest weakness the
architect Matrix Reloaded isn't that the truth the following morning I walked into the bedroom we used to share to look for clothes to dress for work I was moving around quietly as to avoid waking CLA as I was dressing I took a moment to look at my wife and my heart nearly dropped it fell into my pants Claire slept in only a t-shirt she'd always done this how had I not realized how beautiful she was how had it slipped my notice night after night that I had this desirable woman lying next to me with only
a few pieces of material separating us from carnal pleasure my God as I stood there looking at her laying on her stomach breathing Softly As she slept while the short t-shirt rode high enough on her waist I was speechless it's funny Claire and I hadn't really had a steamy sexual relationship for the longest time even before she started getting it from Doug but now when facing the prospect of never being able to touch her again I ACH to touch her this is what I was losing on the brink of losing what I took for granted
all of these years suddenly I wanted my wife like I hadn't wanted her in a long time I got near her and touched her waist and then suddenly she said yes Doug yes I have never gone from fully aroused to completely turned off in a matter of seconds before this moment have you ever rapidly cooled white hot metal before when metal is hot to the point of glowing white it can be manipulated easier applying pressure will bend it to any shape that it is willed but once it gets super cooled it is solid unbendable the
only thing pressure will do at this point is break it that is what happened to my heart it was super cooled the excitement that I was feeling at the possib ability of making love to my wife was instantly turned into a sick gut-wrenching agonizing awareness it literally felt like a sharp piercing stab to my chest the bond that my heart had to this false hope was finally broken I had lost her my marriage was over the only thing left was a heart that broke under the pressure with tears in my eyes I left the room
I think she tried to call out to me but I wasn't listening I ran into the safety of my office slammed the door shut and cried hard the body shaking kind of crying where your entire soul is open Frank I'm sorry I was half asleep I didn't realize I heard from the doorway I turned to find my wife standing there looking at me with pain in her eyes I didn't even realize that she'd come in get out get out I yelled at her as I pushed her out and slammed the door in her face I
went out straight to Doug and once I reached I ran to his front door I hammered on the front door of the condo like I was the police here for a raid hug get out of here you backstabbing scumsucker neighbors began to peek out of their windows and crack open their doors to see what the commotion was about I didn't give a about them though I had only one objective to ram my fist into Doug's face as many times as it took to make myself feel better after having my wife call out his name while
she was sleeping he might be dead by the time I felt better I heard my cell phone ring I looked at the display and saw that it was Claire calling to save your lover figures he'd call you to save him well screw you and screw him cla's desperate Voice blared through my earpiece no Frank I'm calling to save you Doug called the cops they on their way over there right now to arrest you if you don't want to go to jail leave think about your girls this had the audacity to lecture me about thinking about
my girls after everything that led me to this stains front door she felt the need to make me think rationally about what my actions would do to the family really I hope you realize the irony of you telling me to think about what I'm doing to this family eat Claire she sighed impatiently well at least think about what going to jail could mean for your security clearance you know how fidgety those guys are Frank going to jail could have you under the microscope for months how is that going to affect your job she was right
hell I couldn't lose my job over this my marriage was already toast I wasn't willing to lose the only thing that kept me saying right now my silence made her laugh sardonically right do the right thing for your job if not your family at least you know what's important Claire go to hell and take your boyfriend with you I said as I hung up on her I made my way to my car but I still had one last thing to say to my ex-best friend this is an over dug do you hear me you backstabbing
a-hole as I sped away tears threatened to flood my eyes once again screw this I wasn't going to cry over this I was tired tired of hoping praying to some apathetic deity that he would wake my wife up and make her love me she wants duck not me I saw her face on the screen of my phone a few more times indicating that she was trying to call me I ignored every last one of them she was the last person I wanted to talk to right now as I sped around a corner completely ignoring the
stop sign I saw something move in front of me my brain focused to a reality that stopped my breath in front of me was a mother and her child walking across the street and I was speeding toward them I slammed on my brakes and watched their faces turned to mask of horror they froze right there in front of me Paralyzed by fear my tires screeched loudly as they gripped the pavement please God no something somewhere must have heard me because my car lurched to a stop with a few inches to spare the mother's face turned
from a panicked woman on the verge of death to a maniacally crazed woman are you crazy you almost killed me what is your problem she carried on for a minute but I was thankful that her kid was there I could tell she was tempering her language for his sake still the Venom in her voice could not be hidden no amount of apologizing would calm her I guess telling someone that you're sorry for almost mowing her and her child down with two tons of steel does seem a bit insignificant we parted ways and I drove somewhere
cautiously to park I wasn't in any condition to drive my nerves were all over the place my mind was a jumbled mess filled with intertwining thoughts of pain Revenge rage and betrayal I wasn't myself I was someone else I'm normally a logical person always prepared always with a plan not this guy running to that a-hole house calling him out like bully on the playground after school that wasn't me I needed to get my head on straight it was time to accept the facts my marriage was over cap it there was no saving us no hope
for Redemption it was time for me to pull the trigger take it out of her hands and put the ball back into my court I was done I fished the intricately designed card out of my wallet the address to his office his phone number and a brief quote was superimposed over a picture of a Stern looking Terry he looked every bit the Bulldog that he was after I punched his number into my phone I waited for an answer the pleasant sounding secretary greeted me letting me know that I'd reached teren Ross office once she put
me through to him I only said one thing send me the Marine Frank what happened Terry asked with concern in his voice who cares what happened send me the goddamn Marine I want that bitch's interest to be scattered all over the place my voice was dead panned yet filled with Venom and anger if that were possible like a serial killer trying to explain to his victim why he was doing what he was doing there was silence on the other end of the line for a moment I thought that I hung up on him Terry yeah
I'm here Frank tell me what happened I sighed in despair the emotion finding its way to my voice she called out the a-hole name when we were about to make love she called out his name saying the words out loud only made me feel more humiliated I was the one who was touching her and she yells his name out listen Frank a lot has happened and you need to process it your emotions are high why don't you go to a hotel don't even go back home to pack you need to get away from her for
a moment and clear your head I was silent on my end he heard my lack of response and felt that he had a little more convincing to do now is not the time to make decisions Frank I've seen this play out time and time again trust me it doesn't well for anybody least of all the kids why would you ask me if I wanted the Navy SEAL or Marine Terry why give me the choice to annihilate the in the first place if you were going to chicken out on me I spit out in anger Terry
took a deep breath listen Frank had you wanted the Assassin from the jump I would have given you his number in a heartbeat but your hesitancy shows me that you care about what happens to your wife after this is all over the fact that you made such a drastic change in so short a time period means that your head is not thinking right decisions made on the verge of these circumstances are always regretted trust me I was starting to calm down and see reason he was right the last thing I wanted despite my current mood
was to turn this into a war zone with collateral damage namely my kids no matter what Claire thought of me I did love my girls I didn't want to make this any worse for them than it had to be still I wanted that and her boyfriend to pay they deserved retribution for what they did to me what do I do Terry I'm dying here I'm laying here with my heart shattered into a million pieces and they are acting like I'm the one in the wrong what do I do I laid my head on the steering
wheel and sat there for a moment feeling the pain my world was spinning out of control and I had nothing to latch on to that is the worst feeling for a person who is always in control tell you what I heard His Voice break through I'm going to do something completely unethical here I'm going to text you an address you are going to meet me there you need a drink maybe even something else I don't think so Terry Frank this isn't open for discussion I can be there in about 15 minutes I'll have a table
all ready for us by the time you get there see you soon with that he cut the connection like there was nothing else to talk about 2 minutes later my phone chimed with a message at the Mario's gentleman Lounge is he serious a strip club my life has been ripped up by the roots my sense of self is in question and he thinks that a lap dance is supposed to make me feel better what can I do for you sweetie a woman with glittery makeup asked me in a sultry voice that just dripped with lust
and sex after I made the decision to step inside of the club in fact her entire body was glittery even her full lips which were bright red sparkled under the lights the only clothes that she had on were panties that consisted of a paper thin strip of material in the front and dental floss that ran between her but cheeks in the back even with the mood I was in I couldn't help but to take notice to how beautiful she was smooth Flawless skin flat stomach and curvy hips even her feet were sexy um I'm here
to meet a friend actually he's my loyer well not my lawyer but I was stammering I know I took a deep breath and calmly said I'm here to meet a man named Terry or Mr Ross the beautiful woman giggled and placed her hand in the middle of my chest to calm me down her smile was infectious I knew that I was making a fool of myself it wasn't my first time seeing a naked woman but being here in this environment had me a little out of sorts you're Frank I'm Starlet Terry told me to watch
out for you he's in the VIP section he wanted me to bring you to him when you arrived I breathed a sigh of relief that I could stop talking she casually waved her finger indicating that I was to come with her follow me sugar the beautiful goddess led the way her shapely hips bouncing from side to side as she walked I couldn't help but to stare I was so mesmerized that I didn't even realize that she stopped walking until I nearly bumped into her oh God I'm sorry I wasn't watching where I was going she
giggled once again it's okay it's nice to know that you were admiring me so much that you forgot how to walk I didn't wear these panties because I wanted you to act like a gentleman she watched in Amusement as I stuttered for a response when I didn't come up with one she continued the VIP section is right up these stairs she said as she pointed to a narrow hallway that housed a staircase the sign above it said champagne room as we go up I I fully expect your eyes on my hips I will be highly
offended if they aren't am I clear I couldn't help but to smile at her yes ma'am I said with a fake salute she smiled seductively and winked at me as she led me up the stairs she took each one slowly purposefully her heels clacked every time they made contact with the wood and her toned calves flexed with each step as we ascended into the upper room I did my best not to offend her there he is Terry yelled loudly as he lifted his glass to greet me when I walked into room he was surrounded by
several beautiful women unlike the downstairs which was stuffed full of learing men and drunken a-holes this area was close to being secluded the flashing lights of main section weren't found up here the lighting was now soft and intimate the booming music was replaced with smooth jazz Starlet took me by the hand and led me over to Terry it was an intimate gesture walking hand in hand her touch sent chills throughout me I see you've met Starlet he said as he smiled broadly as we approached I sheepishly nodded yeah we've met she answered for me Frank
and I are good friends aren't we Frank she asked playfully the best I was able to get out I was pleasantly surprised to hear that the sarcasm that I intended made it through she laughed and bumped me with her shoulder well good sit Frank sit he said as he pointed to a chair across from him I sat in the indicated seat a strip club I wouldn't think a lawyer would take his client to a strip club Club well first of all you're not my client I'm not representing you in any open cases you're a friend
however I think it would still be best if we never speak about this after tonight I nodded in understanding secondly he continued I need to clear your head distract you for a bit with a little misdirection you are about to make a Monumental decision and you need to be clear-headed but we'll speak about that in a little bit for right now enjoy the lovely entertainment of these gorgeous young ladies now which one would you like a dance from first I looked at Starlet and her eyes met mine I didn't say anything for a moment but
my message was clear good choice she said as she gently grabbed my hand and led me to a secluded corner of the room once we had some privacy relatively speaking she sat me down in a chair then she straddled me wrapped her arms around the back of my neck and sat down right in my lap she smelled so good like flowers her glittery skin added to her Aura of Seduction she was a perfect sex Angel this your first lap dance she asked in a soft voice I was finding it hard to concentrate with her legs
spread across me yeah that obvious I asked nervously trying to sound calm I tried to look at her but I had to turn my head she was peering right at me practically looking through me her eyes were focused on my face it was intense you were good at this I said trying to loosen the tension she smirked at me and gave a little giggle I haven't even started yet sweetie I was waiting for the next song to start but I'm glad you're warmed up for me she gave a little bounce I Like You Frank I
like you too I can tell she laughed I had to laugh with her I felt so at ease with her so relaxed the two of us were lost in our own world my nerves faded and I allowed my hands to roam freely having a woman like Starlet grinding her soft skin up against you is cathartic let no one tell you differently any man who doesn't momentarily forget his troubles in that instance is too far gone in his misery to be saved I know that Terry's intent was for me to sample the other girls but I
was just fine with Starlet she was the hottest one in this club about an hour later Terry cleared the girls out of the room and put his business face onow that your mind is clear let's talk I want you to think about what it is that you want from all of this after the dust settles what can you live with if you go nuclear you need to be sure it's what you want I nodded as I took a sip of the stale warm beer that had been sitting out for a little while now I don't
know I guess I want what's fair but most of all I want my kids to not be damaged by all of this you know he smiled knowingly and patted me on the back I looked up at the ceiling inside give me the seal I just want this to be over with I need to move on he handed me another card just like he did when I met him at his office it wasn't as elaborately designed as his but it had all of the info that I needed give Mike a call tomorrow I'll tell him to
be expecting you with that he started to put his jacket on and retie his tie that was hanging limply around his neck do you miss her Terry your ex do you wish things could have worked out differently I asked him curiously a sad look crossed his face as he paused getting dressed every day he said f lorely what happened to Christine did she ever regret leaving you the glazed over pain once again crossed his eyes no Frank honestly I couldn't expect her to I wasn't the best husband I was working all of the time and
when I was home I wasn't really you know I guess I can understand that I said as I reflected on my own marriage he saw me going down that path and cut me off Frank you were nothing like me trust me I cheated on my wife with my secretary scratched that I got caught cheating on her with my secretary I'd done it dozens of times and scathed I treated her like property instead of like a wife and she sat there taking it I thought she was the perfect wife thought I had the perfect life I
could do anything I wanted and come home to her like nothing happened he gave a self-deprecating huff that could have been a laugh why don't you try to get her back it seems like you still love her the pain in his eyes grew if that were possible I did for a while nothing worked she been lied to so many times that anything I said was automatically a lie hell even I started to believe my lies there was a time when I actually thought she was cheating on me I hired a private eye in everything I
was ready to Scorch the Earth around her and piss on her corpse so what happened well it turns out that she had the same suspicions about me only hers turned out to be correct it's funny I never even gave a second thought to my cheating but when I thought it was her doing it I was livid long story short she left me then she met some other guy a school teacher they got married last year you know what the worst part is I know that she's better off with him I'm a lawyer who makes a
lot of money and she's better off with a school teacher who drives a Ford Focus how do you respond to that after a moment of reliving his regrets he mentally shook it off and walked over to the mirror to continue making himself presentable you know he said as he looked at me through the reflection in the mirror he had a Sly grin on his face Starlet doesn't just do lap dances she has other services that she offers wait a minute what other services does Starlet offer he chuckled as he turned around to face me let's
just say that she is a sensual woman and that she really knows how to relieve stress I knew what he was getting at I'm not an idiot you say services like she has sex for money he looked at me with a Sly grin like I was finally getting the picture you mean she's a woman who likes to help men out he finished for me I was trying to wrap my mind around it I mean it wasn't out of the realm of reality but still have you ever gotten your stress relieved from her for money of
course not Frank exchanging money for sexual Services is illegal but Starlet and I are too two consenting adults who had sex a couple of times great sex I may add did you pay her for sex no I told you that's illegal I'm a lawyer but I may have loaned her money on occasion she just hasn't paid me back yet I have to admit that I looked at Starlet a little differently with this new information I mean I know that she's a stripper and all but I didn't Peg her for a prostitute I thought I felt
something a connection with her chemistry don't get me wrong I wasn't ready to give her my class ring or start walking her to school but it seemed like there were Sparks our playful banter the hand holding the way she looked at me it felt like it meant something maybe I was projecting she was flirting with me but isn't that her job I guess I wouldn't really be the best judge of that at a time like this anyway on the other hand the thought of Starlet and I having sex was intriguing very intriguing her body looked
flawless I may be an emotional wreck but I'm Still A Guy a very horny guy who hasn't had sex in a while but I wasn't ready for anything like that especially paying for it that seems so wrong to me I'm sure Starlet was worth every penny but with everything going on I couldn't bring myself to do it so you want me to send Starlet up Terry asked one final time I shook my head nah I got a head out myself I have a lot to do but thanks for calming me down Terry I needed this
I really appreciate everything that you've done for me anytime Frank and good luck the next morning Doug opened the door to his his office and almost on himself when he saw me sitting in his chair behind his desk what the f morning Doug I said with exaggerated Congeniality Frank how the hell did you get in here you have 10 seconds to get out before I call security he said as he pulled out his cell phone put the damn phone down Doug I just wanted to talk you owe me that much I said as I held
up my hands in a move to show peaceful intentions he looked at me thoughtfully I don't want any problems Frank if you want to talk we can do that but this is my job you can't come in here and cause any trouble for me I wanted to run across the room and spear him like a linebacker but I knew that would only get me a one-way ticket to jail I was on his territory he had homec court advantage plus I wouldn't get answers there are things I needed to hear from him unfortunately he had to
be conscious to give me those answers you have a lot of nerve telling me that I can't make trouble for you a hell lot of nerve at least he had the decency to look somewhat dejected Frank I'm sorry for what happened I really am it's been eating at me it took everything in me to remain seated it was eating at him suddenly his feelings mean something in this situation you're sorry Doug what are you sorry for for stabbing me in my back for taking the only thing I would never share with you for ruining my
marriage for breaking up my family or for throwing away 13 years of friendship you're going to have to break it down for me doug because sorry can cover a whole lot of bases look Frank I understand why you're upset but I'm sorry did you just say that you understand why I'm upset you sound like customer service when they get an order wrong screw you do you even have the slightest clue do you really understand why I feel betrayed by the one person I called a friend I get it Frank no you don't don't you dare
say you get it you will never get what I feel right now I trusted you my fist slammed into his desk in a moment of uncontrolled anger the sound echoed through the office bouncing off of the walls and looming around us or at least it seemed that way to me I was so emotional that I was practically vibrating what you did hurt me in more ways than just stealing my wife you also stole 13 years of friendship 10 years of marriage and you don't give a about that he took a pause for a moment to
gather himself it must be hard trying to argue a point when you were the one in wrong I know that what happened is hard for you I did betray you I regret that more than anything but he stopped what he was about to say but what you were never there for her she needed you and you weren't there I jumped out of my seat and marched across the room until we were face to face to his credit he didn't Flinch or back down in fact he stared me down with the same intensity that I was
glaring at him with you want to know why Frank why I did what I did fine I'll tell you because you didn't deserve her you had a that wonderful woman at home who was just aching for attention you couldn't care less night after night she waited for you to notice notice her but you were always at work you never made time for her for your kids face it Frank you don't want a family it took every ounce of self-restraint to not put my fist through his face I was so pissed I could visualize what I
wanted to do to him you scumsucker is that what you tell yourself so that you can sleep at night telling yourself that old frank had it coming in case you didn't realize I had to work you think because you were able to swoop in and tell CLA how pretty she was that you know the slightest thing about taking care of a family about being a husband how do you think we got that big house to live in huh do you think that Claire's Lexus RX was free where do you think the money came from to
pay for all of that I was speaking with so much force that spit was coming from my mouth but Doug still had no intention of backing down let alone apologizing he was standing his ground he honestly felt that he had a legitimate claim here Frank you and I both know that you aren't an hourly worker what the hell does that have to do with anything thing you could have gone home anytime you felt like you get paid the same whether you work 50 hours or 80 you were there because you wanted to be there even
In the Heat of this argument I couldn't deny the truth behind his words it made me pause he took that pause as an indication that he made a valid point and he stuck his heels even more in the sand you could have made time for her if you wanted to Frank you didn't you didn't try to make your marriage work he was so full of righteous indignation I think that was my biggest issue with this situation both he and CLA had no remorse about this because they felt they were right I took a step back
and tried a different approach Doug tell me when is cla's period my voice was so calm in comparison to how it was a few seconds ago that it threw him a little he looked confused why would I know that I continued what is Kelly allergic to Stacy has nightmares after she watches a certain movie yet she still watches it every time it comes on TV what is it he still stood there with a perplexed look on his face I was on a roll I'll ask you some easy ones Doug what is Kelly's favorite food or
Stacy's I don't see what this has to do with anything I laughed sardonically of course you don't Doug you're busy screwing my wife telling her how wonderful she is and how much of an idiot I am but here's something you don't know Claire Kelly Stacy they're a total package you can't have CLA without having them also the fact that you've been screwing my wife for 6 months and haven't even tried get to know my girls better tells me something about you he looked like he swallowed a roach but I wasn't done with him yet you
think you know her because the two of you share some laughs after you roll around in the bed for a bit but you know about marriage I was with her when she gave birth to my daughters she almost died giving birth to Kelly by the way I was at her aunt's funeral with her do you know who her aunt was she was the one Claire ran to whenever her mother was too drunk to cook food for her and her younger sister but you didn't know that all you know is what kind of food my wife
lik likes or what position she likes to be screwed in it's easy to love someone in Between the Sheets it's what comes after that makes a marriage work he finally found his voice and it was not as confident and assured as it was when he was reaming me Frank I save it Doug there isn't you can say to me if you can do what you did to me after 13 years of friendship how do you think you could do right by Claire and My Girls how could you even think you have what it takes to
maintain a marriage and a family if you cared about my family like you think you do the thought of hurting my girls would kill you inside you would do what I'm doing you would swallow the bile and put what you feel like doing on the back burner you would do this because the thought of bringing them pain would far outweigh your desire to get what you wanted but we both know that the only thing you wanted from my family was cla's glory holes I started to walk out of his office when I got to the
doorway I heard him say I love her Frank whether you believe me or not I love her I stopped and shook my head without turning around I said I don't don't ever want to see you again Doug this is your only warning one day there will come a time when security and the police won't be able to help you you will answer for this it may not be today or tomorrow but it will happen with that I left him in peace for now as the weeks dragged into months the divorce started gaining momentum Claire had
found a lawyer a seal much to my relief and things kind of took on a life of its own I was still staying in the house as was she we saw no need to get separate residences at least for the moment I had no problem using my office as a more permanent sleeping space we'd come to a sort of truce about the entire thing the pain and anger was still there for me but it was like a dull ache there were times when it flared up a giggle overheard when she was on her cell phone
or a strange gift that I knew I hadn't given her were triggers we would get into a few rows but after a while those instances died down I was becoming resigned to the fate of my family and was making peace with it we interacted with each other when he had to dinner time dealing with the girls Etc we didn't want to make things awkward for the girls so we tried to keep up appearances for their sake we never crossed the proverbial Line in the Sand that we drew i e any form of intimacy but we
were friendly at least on the outside all in all it was the best shitty situation one could hope for I know the cliche of a divorced man is to throw himself into work but for me that would be redundant the only difference as far as the amount of time I spent at work was the freedom of not feeling guilty I I hadn't seen or heard from Doug since our encounter I really didn't expect to after 13 years of friendship a part of me missed him not really him but the camaraderie that we had or I
thought we had I don't make friends easily as sad as it is he and Claire were the only two people that I'd considered friends I didn't do activities that required more than one person so meeting new people was problematic for me my main hobby was figuring out a difficult problem that had to do with work now since I was no longer getting sex I added the hobby of watching spicy videos so while Claire got to enjoy the freedom of searching for the love life she craved I was left alone as far as Claire I tried
to stay out of her business I didn't ask if she were still seeing Doug but I had my suspicions she often went out giving lightly veiled excuses for her absence it would start with her coming to me casually asking questions that were supposed to be innocuous these question were about any plans that ID made as far as going out for the night then she would tell me about plans that she had made and forgot about sometimes she was meeting some friends other times she was having a mean night she knew that I knew I could
see it in her eyes as she gave me her paper thin explanations she wasn't really trying hide it or be deceitful in her mind she was free the marriage was only held together by the long wait for that piece of paper that made the divorce official I think she was trying to leave me with as much dignity as she could by not throwing it in my face she didn't leave the house all dressed and made up like she was going on a date she tried not to make it too obvious yet she didn't insult my
intelligence by going out of her way to get me to buy it in a way I was thankful for at least that consideration but it also didn't do much to quell that anger I was also a little jealous there was the whole my best friend part but there was another piece that invoked my Envy here she was with the bright New Prospect of Love ahead of her and I was stuck being alone on the one hand I didn't really mind being alone but on the other hand I was irked that she had the opportunity to
move on and I didn't but there was nothing I could do about it she was no longer my wife she had no responsibility to keep her vows hell she'd already blown them Skyhigh there was no need for her to be any more faithful in divorce than she was when we were married still it burned it seemed like I was the only one going through the pain of ending a marriage CLA got a pass from the Heartbreak and was having a Merry Old Time pursuing new love me I had my job things would have probably continued
for me in that vein until the divorce decree arrived but life some times has a way of shaking you one evening Claire was out with friends and I was planted in my office like I normally was working out algorithms Stacy my 8-year-old came in my office daddy Mrs Benson said that she needed the money tomorrow mommy forgot to give it to me do you have it she asked as she walked over to me money for what sweetheart I asked as I hoisted her up and sat her on my lap for my cheerleading uniform and my
pom poms she said surprised as if it were something I should have already known I thought back and vaguely remembered Claire telling me that Stacy wanted to do cheerleading I didn't think anything of it because I didn't realize that they had cheerleading for 8-year-olds apparently they did I was unaware that things had moved from her wanting to do cheerleading to her actually needing money for a uniform oh yeah the money for cheerleading I remember now I lied through my teeth she smiled and kissed me on the cheek thanks Daddy she said as she shimmed off
of my lap before she exited I asked sweetie how much was it again I was expecting her to say something in the 40s or 50s how much could a cheerleading uniform cost for an 8-year-old I almost choked when she said $98.99 she pronounced every syllable proudly but even her cute voice didn't make that number sound any better however once she was gone out of the room I was fighting with a whole other demon I didn't even know she was in cheerleading what kind of father has no idea what activities his daughter is up to that
thought plagued me what further vexed me was the knowledge that had I missed her events it wouldn't have been a big deal more of the same o same o CLA would have made excuses for me I'm sure my daughter would have been given some daddy is busy but he sendes love explanation but she shouldn't have to CLA shouldn't be put in the position to make my daughter understand why daddy can't be there military kids have to understand that their fathers and mothers are fighting for our country their absence actually means something here I was in
the same city and state as my daughters and they have to understand why their father has no time for them but I'm working hard for them to give them the life that I never had wrong you are working hard for you you enjoy working hard more than you enjoy your family you are at work because that is where you really want to be was that true of course it was I knew it I've always known it I hid behind the excuse that I was doing it for my family but I couldn't support that lie anymore
I didn't get paid any more money working 80 hours a week than I got working 50 I didn't have have to come home and keep working I did it because I loved the job more than I loved my family that's not true I love my family if I had to make a choice between saving my family and my job which would I choose hell I'd already made that choice all of the times Clare begged me to spend time with her all of the vacations that I canceled because there was a problem that I felt no
one could solve but me all of the birthdays that I missed I always chose work over my family now my family was being taken away from me and it doesn't even make me Miss A Beat I guess this situation was sort of karmic Justice for me no matter how much of an creep Doug was he was right about one point during our marriage I almost always chose work over CLA now the seeds of imbalance that I planted Once Upon a Time had sprouted into a full blown tree my family was slipping away from me and
I had no choice but to spend time at work staring at your reflection with no blinders is daunting that's what I did metaphorically what I saw was a monster maybe not the kind of monster who harms his kids but a monster nonetheless I was a monster who thought he was a hero the damage that I did to my kids was justified because I made good money I was able to wave it off and still say that I love them in my mind I didn't have to be there to show them love I can just buy
it to ease my guilt for wanting to be someplace else I closed the lid to my laptop shutting off my work I would deal with that stuff tomorrow I had more important things to do right now girls I yelled out as I walked out of my office who wants to go out for pizza an ice cream the shrieks of Joy made me smile it was music to my ears 911 call me immediately the girls are gone I thought you were staying home with them please get home so we can find them that was the desperate
text that I got as the girls and I sat in the restaurant between us was a half-eaten pizza and three empty bowls of ice cream my daughters had barely nibbled on their slice of pizza before they were begging for dessert it's funny how they were too full to finish their dinner yet found the room to completely decimate their Frozen ENT treat girls are safe they are with me I shot back to Claire thank God was the reply I got I almost put my phone away when another text came through you took the girls out I
didn't respond to that you see my girls were in the middle of serenading me with Let It Go from the movie Frozen they belted the lyrics out in a unified voice as loud as they could I may be biased but I think that they sounded better than the cartoon version singing it I looked around me expecting to find annoyed customers but what I saw was a restant full of smiling people who were looking at my daughters and cheering them on Kelly and Stacy sang their hearts out completely oblivious to the audience that they had I
used my phone and started recording I noticed that several of the people most likely parents of kids my daughter's Ages were mouthing the words to the song along with them when the girls finished with a sassy the cold never bothered me anyway the entire restaurant exploded in Applause and cheers what the girls did next floored me normally when a person realizes that they have an unexpected audience they get embarrassed Stacy obviously not shy like her father actually got out of her seat and took a bow Kelly soon joined at her side and the two performers
took a unified bow to their adoring fans I don't think I ever witnessed anything that was simultaneously as beautiful and as funny as the sight of my daughter's bowing and blowing kisses like they just finished a Broadway play this is what I was missing out on all of these years I couldn't stop smiling my girls my beautiful girls were growing up so fast and they were amazing while I was constantly trying to make a better engine or improve the latest stats I was missing precious moments like this what if I hadn't done this tonight what
if I just stayed home like i' done countless other nights and banged away at my keyboard I would still be blind what if more years had passed before I woke up how long were Kelly and Stacy going to stay this young and innocent I realized that I didn't want to look back years from now and not have memories of moments like this when my girls come home with boyfriends and fiances I want to embarrass them by telling stories of tonight and other nights like it when things died down I paid the check and we left
when we got in the car Stacy said thank you for the ice cream Daddy I like it when you take us out you're welcome sweet pea thanks for the song she giggled you're welcome you're the best daddy ever within moments my girls were fast asleep I drove the rest of the way home in Silence the best daddy ever kids very rarely see the flaws in their parents when they are young no matter how much we neglect them and put them on the back burner they still think we walk on water even when we don't when
I pulled into the driveway I shot Clare a text in driveway girls sleep need help moments later CLA came out and grabbed Kelly she instantly wrapped her arms and legs around CLA Stacy did the same to me when I lifted her we carried our daughters to their rooms once we got them laid down we met in the hallway so you stopped working long enough to take them out I'll bet they loved that what did you guys do she asked not able to hide the surprise in her voice we went out for pizza and ice cream
then they serenad me with a song I couldn't help but laugh at the memory you should have seen them CLA they were amazing the entire restaurant sang along with them then when everyone cheered they got up and bowed they bowed I have never seen anything like it we shared a laugh as I showed her the video we had to squeeze in close so that both of us could see it being that close to her felt odd after everything that happened as of late she must have felt it too because she shot me a quick glance
as she took a step back I'm glad you got to spend time with Kelly and Stacy it was really nice of you you should do that more often they're going to need it wi her voice trailed off without finishing the sentence but she didn't really have to yeah I know I'm going to make some changes tonight was an eyeopener for me I don't want to miss out on their childhood I've already lost you I don't want to lose them she looked strangely at me as if trying to see if I was being factious or not
not I was speaking honestly and from the heart and I guess that she saw that her face had a flash of regret cross it but it went away quickly well no matter what you do they will love you that's how children are too bad adults aren't like that I said without thinking it was meant to be under my breath but I said it loud enough for her to hear once again the regret crossed over her face and this time it didn't go away Frank don't start I felt the urge to apologize but then I didn't
what was I apologizing for speaking the truth my intent wasn't to hurt her but it didn't make what I said any less true just help me understand CLA was I really that bad bad enough for you to stop loving me you really feel nothing about this you don't feel bad at all are you really asking me if I feel bad of course I do I feel like every time I think about it all of the plans that we had all of the memories I feel like a failure on top of that we aren't going to
be able to hide this from the girls forever Monday and very soon we are going to have to tell them what is going on and it will crush them I feel bad that we are going to break their hearts and it was my decision that put it in motion so why why did you do it tears were forming in her eyes as she looked up at the ceiling with her hands on her hips because I got lonely Frank plain and simple I live in this big house I have all of the latest clothes I drive
a fancy car and I'm miserable all I wanted was a little time from you that's all just small tokens of appre appreciation to let me know that I mattered but apparently I was worthless I was so undesirable that my husband made time for everything else but me and Doug does all of that for you she nodded in acknowledgement yes he does make me feel desirable he text me to see how I'm doing he sends me flowers he likes being around me is that what you wanted to hear that was the last thing I wanted to
hear but I did want to I had to know I had to understand what he gave her that I didn't now I did well as soon as I'm out of the way the two of you can be together you can ride off into the sunset hand in hand don't do this Frank what's done is done going down this road is only going to lead to more pain I had to laugh at that even though it was the farthest thing from funniest statement could get are you serious you are seriously trying to tell me not to
go down this road because it will lead to more pain you do realize that this road that I'm going down is one that you set us on right her nose flared and her eyes narrowed she poked me in the chest and said in case you forgot you neglected me first I couldn't hold it in anymore I couldn't swallow the bile anymore you know what Claire I'm so sick of you singing that same sad tune in case you forgot you cheated on me with my best friend do you think anything I did justifies that do you
really think that I deserve that kind of pain she didn't have a response to that which actually boded well for her only a complete sociopath would have answered that question with another defense I wasn't done yet I had a a real eye opener tonight Claire tonight I came face to face with my choices I see how I played a part in where we are but you sit back crying about the big bad husband who worked too much and you completely ignore what you brought to this tell me did you once suggest that we go to
counseling did you do anything to try to fix this I came to you Frank and you ignored me so what was your next step hir because here is my thinking my logic if you will when you have a project that isn't going the way you want it to go you think think of a next step if the project is worth saving and you believe in it then you seek alternative options to saving it bringing in a fresh set of eyes to see if there is anything you missed is the preferable choice or you can scrap
it all together and start working on a new project one that is more worthwhile because the old project just isn't worth the headache so my question to you is what was your next step you would use an engineering analogy that's all you're capable of thinking about she said with a sneer however her eyes were transparent I knew I hit Pay Dirt even she couldn't deny the logic to what I said her Ploy at misdirection was feeble it's an analogy that fits and you know it if this marriage was so important to you why didn't you
change tactics why didn't you get a fresh set of eyes why didn't you suggest we go to counseling she immediately got defensive you didn't suggest counseling either I wasn't the one who was disatisfied I thought we were okay maybe I was naive or not paying attention but I didn't see our our marriage on a path to destruction if I did I would have tried to fix it because to me our marriage was a project worth saving but for you this marriage was not worth anything you just took the easy way out and opened your legs
to a new I took a moment to look at her before finishing I couldn't stop my face from forming the disgusted expression that came over it nor did I want to you saw our marriage heading over a cliff and you watched it from afar you let it dangle there then you walked over and pushed it off now you want to sit here and pretend that you did everything you could to save it like you had no other choice but that ain't flying CLA you slept with my best friend you not only had an affair but
you did it with the one person that would hurt me the most you could have found anybody else to screw but you chose Doug no part of you felt that this boundary was off limits the two of you decided that my feelings no longer mattered and you want to sit back and try to make what you did okay by now the tears were free flowing down her face but she still didn't have a response we both just stood there in frustrated silence alone in the same room but separated by an impassible Chasm created by years
of neglect apathy and bad choices what do you want me to say Frank you're right I'm sorry would that make you feel better huh another misdirection Ploy make it about my ego my need to punish her but I wasn't letting her off that easily you quit trying Claire you gave up on our marriage you need to own that that was your choice you left left me nothing to fight for she finally whispered between sobs I couldn't do this anymore I was mentally and physically drained I'm tired Claire I'm going to bed with that I went
into my office and closed the door behind me a couple of weeks after that conversation took place the papers arrived Signed Sealed Delivered it was official my marriage was over the divorce was pretty amicable I don't mean to understate the pain that went into actually sitting with the lawyers and dividing assets but dwelling on it won't make the story any more interesting I was told by both lawyers that it was a fair divorce though I would wholeheartedly disagree sure all of our material things were split pretty fairly except the house which she got because she
had primary custody of the kids but it seemed like I got the Lion Share of the emotional baggage on top of that she received monthly child support and spousal support from me I agreed with the child support but to pay spousal support to the woman who voluntarily split the family up seemed like a kick in the nuts but there was no way around it that's the beauty of no fault divorce my only consolation was that it would have been way more if Mike wasn't there the first proposal was 2/3 of my paycheck was I able
to live on what was left over sure I did make a lot of money I had a fair share of Investments and other assets I was successful in hiding some of those assets from her lawyer so I wasn't the stereotypical divorced husband who has to live like a popper still I would have liked for her to experience a little more discomfort for her choices I also thought about my girls I had to question the wisdom behind the choice to Shield them from the impending doom by pretending that nothing was different why we made that choices
Beyond me now we could no longer hide it from them instead of preparing them ahead of time and getting them used to the idea we were left with the task of suddenly pulling the rug out from under them as much as I would like to claim benevolent love as the reason for keeping the real situation of my marriage a secret from the kids I can't at this point in my life I was done hiding my failures behind the in veil of selfless acts gone wrong pretending that my bad decisions were done out of a misguided
attempt to protect the ones I cared about I did it because I was a coward Point Blank Claire had her reason probably the same one as I but I wasn't going to determine my course of actions by what she admits to herself she seems to have a high aptitude for self-rationalizing a mind full of the things I was denied in life so I never really stopped to think about what that meant now those words were my new lease on life what kind of man did I want to be tomorrow the man I am today is
due to the choice I made yesterday to put work above my family if I don't like that man then I have to make choice to change him for tomorrow I wanted to be a good dad I also wanted to be successful who says I couldn't have both I didn't have to create such an imbalance in my life that only left room for one or the other why couldn't I kill kill it at work and then come home to my daughters leaving work behind so I did what I do best I drew up a plan an
algorithm for my life believe it or not math can solve about 90% of the problems we face in life of course an engineer would think that but in this case math was the key if the problem that you are facing is balance then isn't there an equation that could solve that 24 hours in a day 7 days a week that is 168 hours I was accustomed to spending 80 of those hours at work that only left 88 hours for everything else my family had to share those 88 hours with all of the other that I
had to deal with including sleep how had I not seen this before so I used simple math to determine the man that I wanted to be and it took all of 20 minutes I would earn my daughter's love and affection they gave it no matter what I did I owed it to them to be worthy of it I heard sniffling coming from the room that I used to share with my ex-wife the door was open to crack so all I had to do was give it a slight notch I saw Claire laying on her stomach
in the middle of the king-sized bed we once slept on together once upon a time above her head was her copy of the unfolded document that I'd read only a few hours ago her hands were covering her face her body shook as she sobed I wanted to talk to her about where we go from here but now is not the time did I feel Vindicated that she finally showed some sort of emotion over the loss of our marriage for me the blow wasn't as deep as it once was I've been dealing with the fact that
it was over for a a while now ever since she called out Doug's name in bed I'd been wrestling with the task of Burying my marriage she'd been protected Doug kept her occupied enough so that she didn't really have to dwell on it the marriage ending was tomorrow's problem in her eyes today she got to enjoy what she'd been missing while she wasted her years on me however all dreams come to an end reality always catches up with you before her was a tangible item for the choices that she made it was in black and
white and it had her signature she couldn't deny it anymore I lightly closed the door and let her have her moment she was going to need it from here things got a little harder we still had to tell the girls I wasn't looking forward to that so I could imagine what she must be going through I needed something something to distract me even for the moment something beautiful and I knew exactly what it was or rather who it was ever since that day at the club with Terry I'd not been able to stop thinking about
her Starlet I don't know why if I believe Harry she was a prostitute someone who screwed countless men for money not an honorable woman yet I felt something with her a connection the way she looked at me talked to me flirted with me I can't explain it but I wanted to feel that again so I got in my car and drove about 20 minutes later I was pulling into the parking lot of Mario's gentleman's Lounge when I got inside I was met by cigarette smoke the smell of beer and the vision of dozens of near
naked women but I was only looking for one welcome to Marios how can I help you sweetie a beautiful girl said as she greeted me even with the makeup she looked barely old enough to drink as pretty as she was she wasn't what I wanted um yes I was actually looking for someone is Starlet here the girl's smile never left her face but it faded from her eyes yeah she's here who do I tell her is waiting for her I was embarrassed there was no way she would remember me she had to give dozens of
lap dances a day but I gave my name anyway um my name is Frank she's not expecting me or anything I was just wondering if she was available okay hun take a seat at that table right there I'll see if she's not busy the young woman left to search for Starlet and I took a seat at the indicated table a scantily clad waitress approached me to take my drink order and then left to go fill it both Starlet and my drink arrived at the same time hey Frank I'm Starlet Jesse said that you were asking
for me she said as she approached even though I expected it I was kind of disappointed when I didn't see any recognition in her eyes it had been about 4 months since I came here she probably seen hundreds of faces between then and now still there is a desire in all of us to be special to stand out Above the Rest there are thousands of romantic books and movies that feature that one moment when two people make an unexplainable connection amidst all of the distractions that surround them in each of us there is that fantasy
the famous singer pointing to the beautiful fan and pulling her on stage stage the high school nerd who finally gets the attention of the popular cheerleader or the rich prince who hides his royalty status and falls for the nobody girl all of these are common themes in our imaginary scenarios as unrealistic as they are we always want to believe the promise that we stand out from the rest hey Starlet I know you don't remember me I came in here a few months ago with a friend of mine I was feeling really down that day and
you gave me a few dances it made me feel better she smiled broadly at that and sat down in the seat opposite of me I'm glad to hear that would you like another dance now I just happen to be free those eyes looked through me like they done that night transfixed me I would have committed murder for her in that moment luckily the only thing she wanted for me was a lap to grind on I'd like that with that she stood up and held out her hand indicating that she wanted me to take it when
I did she interlaced our fingers and she led me through the club do you want to stay out here in the open area or should we go somewhere more private she asked once again those eyes looked at me like they were seeing through me I turned away it was like looking into the sun private my voice coked she nodded and led me to a corner um I was hoping to go to the champagne room I said once again finding it hard to speak she stopped walking the champagne room isn't cheap you sure that's what you
want I gulped and nodded wondering if she were talking about the actual room or what I imagined went on in there it didn't matter I was willing to to pay for both okay sweetie come with me she said as she led me to the stairs before she went up she stopped and turned suddenly giving me a koi look I remember you now you're Terry's friend came in here because you were having problems with your wife Cherry boy I laughed at that yeah that's me cherry boy well I'm glad you came back to see me Frank
you never forget your first do you now let's go upstairs I don't have to tell you where I want your eyes do I trust me I will not offend you you better not she giggled once we were up the stairs she led me to a private corner I found myself getting nervous I didn't know what to expect was I going to get laid was she expecting to just do a lap dance how do I even ask so Frank what is it that you want she asked as if she saw my dilemma and gave me the
opening that I needed I gulped I don't know I said honestly she sat me down and straddled me just as she did the last time then she bent low until her mouth was right next to my ear did you want a lap dance or something else she whispered her breath dancing on my neck as she spoke her arms wrapped around me and her hands rubbed my head softly the scent of flowers and sex once again filled my nostrils I want you I was lost she owned my eyes and ears at that moment nothing else mattered
what do you want to do to me baby she asked sending me over the edge of Sanity I want I want to have you I said finally she stopped and sat up looking me in my eyes and smiling okay I wanted you to say it to make sure you weren't a cop if you want to have me then you are going to have to do a couple of things first what kind of things first you're going to have to get a room and not a cheap one when I get off of work at 2 you
can pick me up outside the club and take me your place what's the other thing pay me $300 that is precisely what happened I got a room down by the beach it had a balcony that looked out into the ocean it was the peak time close to summer so it was $350 a night I didn't know what she meant by not a cheap room so I went for one that I knew would qualify it wasn't expensive enough to be appearing to show off my money but it definitely wasn't some hole in the wall she strolled
out of the club at about 2:30 she looked around and spotted me by my car as she walked over to me I was struck by how different she looked she was still a sexy bombshell don't get me wrong like I said sexy as hell but she was more real the in the club was the perfect sex spot everything about her screamed take me but this woman walking over to my car was just a girl her face was devoid of all of the over-the-top stripper makeup her hair was pulled back into a tight ponytail that bounced
when she walked she even had on a pair of glasses hey Frank I almost didn't expect you to show up she said when she made it over to me her smile was spread across her face but something was missing in it I guided her over to the passenger side of my car and opened the door for for her she very smoothly stepped inside of the car and sat down when I made it over to the driver's side and got in she lightly touched my hand um do you have something for me she asked I knew
what she was referring to I reached into my pocket and pulled out an envelope that had the money in it once I handed it to her it disappeared into her purse it's always best to get that out of the way early it could ruin the mood later but don't you worry you won't be thinking about it soon enough she purred as she rubbed my arm causing the hairs on it to stand up you have a nice car what do you do she asked as we pulled out of the parking lot of the club I'm an
engineer I designed machines in fact I designed the engine for this very car she looked impressed wow no no it goes from 0 to 60 and less time than it takes to crack an egg I'm actually on the team who was trying to make a new kind of engine I said proudly she nodded and smiled you're obviously very good at your job that's a huge turn on I know she meant it as a compliment but my eyes glossed over when she said that I was good at my job the best in fact but the price
I paid to be that wasn't worth it did I say something wrong she asked I shook it off nah just haunted by ghosts you know I know the feeling she said softly I got the feeling that she was talking more to herself than she was to me we sat in silence for a few moments you hungry I asked trying to break the tension that settled she nodded a little but I'm sure you want to get to the room and get what you paid for I can wait that sat wrong with me I didn't like the
idea of having sex with her and having her hungry while doing it do you like pancakes huh do you like pancakes the only places open at this time are IHOP and McDonald's and I can't eat fake food she gave me a little smile to show that my gesture was appreciated I'm good Frank thanks for asking but I'd rather just do what we came to do that sounded so cold clinical do what we came to do like this was nothing more than a business transaction I mean I guess it was but she could have left me
with the fantasy that this was more okay I said a bit too dejectedly she caught it but she didn't say anything else about it the rest of the ride was pretty quiet it wasn't until we got to the room that the first words were uttered ESO franki what kind of things would you like to do to me she purred her eyes looked me over seductively as if they were taking an object of Desire the change was so sudden yet so seamless she morphed so effortlessly that it appeared to be natural but it wasn't that's when
I got a real look at her this person this purring kitten that was all sex and lust was an act a beautiful Mirage the flirtatious person that she was when I first met her and when I came back to see her tonight wasn't the real Starlet hell that wasn't even her real name I don't know what came over me but I wasn't turned on anymore her sex appeal was caught up in the fantasy a fantasy that I now knew was I didn't didn't want to have sex with her anymore she closed the gap between us
and began to rub my arms and back she lightly kissed my neck as she pressed her body against mine I could feel the softness of her breasts fitting to my chest Starlet I tried to say she continued to kiss me do you like that baby she CED as she her hands snaked its way between us as much as my body wanted her my mind wasn't on the same page for me both were needed I know that many guys would snatch my man card and rip it up over this but with the realization that I now
faced about her I couldn't do it Starlet I said with more assertiveness as I lightly pushed her off she looked confused as I walked to the other side of the room rubbed my head in frustration okay Frank what do you want I thought I had you figured out but apparently not tell me what you're looking for I noticed the hint of exasperation in her voice but she recovered quickly tell mama what she can do for you Frankie she was good she had this seductress personality down cold she was able to switch it on and off
it will but I saw through that I want to get something to eat I'm hungry what about you you hungry I said as I reached for the phone to call room service her face became annoyed but once again it was gone in a Flash and the kitten was back she strolled over to me and tried to wrap herself around me again I sidest stepped her she stood there confused then the irritation bubbled to the surface why the hell did you bring me here for Frank huh are you going to have sex with me or are
you here to play play games I had a long night of dancing and I could be at home sleeping but I came here with you to have sex now tell me what it is that you want so I can make you bust a nut and get home there she was the real Starlet or whatever her name was I want to talk I said honestly she looked at me skeptically for a moment then she shook her head and laughed when she was done laughing she looked at me with irritation again take me back to the club
she said curtly what I said take me back to the goddamn Club that's where my car is parked tonight is over I am not the girl you want and I'm not going to waste either of our time are you kidding how would you know what I want she laughed at me again please you think you're different than the hundreds of other guys that I see what did you think that because you opened the door for me and asked me if I was hungry that I would suddenly become overwhelmed with love this isn't some fairy tale
it was supposed to be a plain old sex in a motel that's not what I was trying to do Frank stop kidding yourself what you want is a girlfriend experience you want to dine me talk and laugh with me and then have sex with me like we're in a real relationship like I'm your girlfriend and then you go home back to your wife and you become the husband that she needs At The Mention Of my wife tears came down I tried to stop them but they wouldn't stop they kept coming I tried to talk but
I couldn't the torent of Tears kept coming Starlet looked at me perplexed for a moment and then her face went sad your wife she left you didn't she at that I broke I sobbed I'm not talking about a manly sort of crying where you let a few tears fall I'm talking about all out balling I just got the papers today I was able to say and then I fell to my knees I thought I was done crying over this I thought I was past this but I wasn't and now I was in a room with
a smoking hot woman and all I could do was cry over that Starlet blew out an exasperated breath as she put her hands on her hips she honestly didn't know what to do slowly she crossed the room and stood over me then she pressed my head into her stomach I wrapped my arms around her waist and let the tears fall we stayed like that for about 10 minutes when the flood subsided I looked up into her eyes they were full of sympathy I'm sorry I guess I ruined the mood I said with a self-deprecating laugh
pretty much she returned but there was a hint of playfulness in her voice then her face got serious look Frank I'm sorry about your marriage I really am but what you want from me tonight isn't something that I can give you I can screw the out of you and leaving you limping home but I can't pretend to be your girlfriend I'm not built that way I'm sorry I nodded as I stood up I get it Starlet I do she nodded and kissed me on the cheek then she grabbed her purse reached inside of it and
grabbed the envelope with money out here's your money Frank she said as she tried to hand it to me I pushed it back at her you keep it Starlet but we didn't have sex I looked at her and I realized that for the first time in a while I felt a sort of release it's not the manliest thing to admit but maybe I just needed a good cry to get that bile out of me having a woman to hug me as I did so may have been exactly what I needed you helped me tonight Starlet
whether you realize it or not you did we didn't have sex but I consider this money well spent so you keep it you earned it she nodded and put it back in her purse we left the room and headed to my car so that I could take her back to the club we sat in silence for a while it wasn't awkward like two people desperately thinking of something to say it was more comfortable neither of us had to speak we didn't really have anything say but it was okay you know what Frank I am hungry
what do you say we go out to IHOP after all she broke the Silence with I glanced at her to find her looking back at me sure I could go for some unlimited pancakes I joked she smiled and nodded me too as we took our detour I turned to her he Starlet if you don't want to answer this I understand but I have to ask what's your real name she took a breath and thought for a minute then she looked at me with those piercing eyes Cassandra you can call me Sandra I smiled at her
and nodded nice to meet you Sandra her look turned into a smirk ah yes nice to meet me cuz I just told you my real name and it's like you're meeting me for the first time clever she said sarcastically I thought so that's because you're corny she threw back at me she laughed as she looked away and shook her head however when I got a look at the reflection of her face in the passenger side window I saw her smiling Sandra it really was nice to meet her I watched in amazement as Sandra devoured every
morsel of food on her plate pancakes eggs bacon all of it gone she must have felt me watching her because she looked up from her meal with an irritated look on her face what she asked with a mouthful of food nothing nothing you just eat like a homeless girl I was about to give you a dollar and have you wash my windshield her face Twisted into a smirk or at least what would have been a smirk if her mouth wasn't so full she swallowed her food and said oh so we're funny now an hour ago
you were balling like little girl who had her first period something passed over my face because hers fell Frank I'm sorry I was just making a joke I didn't mean I waved her apology off no it's cool you didn't say anything wrong I'm just dealing with a lot right now she nodded and took a sip of her orange juice an uncomfortable silence fell between us do you want to talk about it I may be a paid escort and a stripper but I'm also a good listener she said with a self-deprecating laugh I saw a flash
of an insecure little girl in that moment but it went away quickly something about her made me comfortable I got her I felt it that first night we met even though every part of our interaction action was fake I couldn't help feel a sense of kinship with her it's a long boring story trust me you don't want to hear it she looked at me and smiled warmly well you paid me $300 and you bought me breakfast I'm pretty sure sex is off the table so consider this you getting your money's worth wait a minute you're
not paying for this I asked with fake shock as I pointed at the meal her eyes caught the humor in mine and we both laughed then she looked at me expectedly like she was waiting for me to tell her everything so I did I went through the entire story from that first night that CLA revealed that she was unhappy to the first night I met Sandra she didn't interrupt one time when I was finished things fell quiet for a moment if you don't mind me saying your ex-wife is a real she broke the Silence with
I felt like I had an obligation to defend Claire but I didn't to be honest it felt good to have someone on my side she continued I can understand her frustrations with you but to go and sleep with your supposed friend L she says that I left her no choice no reason to fight for the marriage well in my opinion no one ever gives you a reason to fight for something you do it because losing it will be more painful than the fight you have to endure to keep it I've seen mothers endure humiliation and
pain to fight for kids that don't give them a reason to wives will even defend low-life husbands who beat them and degrade them because they feel that being without that person is worse than the they have to deal with to be with them that's the difference between love and everything else love is its own reason to keep fighting I couldn't help but to be amazed with her she saw it and once again gave a self-deprecating laugh what a stripper can't be deep I had to laugh at that I guess you would know more about life
than normal people at that her eyes narrowed as she glared at me angrily her Sudden Change in mood caught me offu more about life than normal people what is that supposed to mean so I guess that I was obviously molested as a child or abandoned by my father why else would I be some abnormal stripper she lashed out it seemed that I insulted her which was not my intent at all no that's not what I meant I was just thinking that you see all kinds of stories with the people you encounter I can't be the
first guy to come to you looking to recover from heartbreak in the room you knew exactly what I was after which means that you came across another guy like me before that's all I meant whatever she looked down at the menu for a moment halting the progression of this conversation I didn't want to make a bigger mess of things than I already had so I simply shut up she must have seen something on the menu that she liked because I saw her lips curled into a smile then she looked up at me and playfully asked
would you let me get a slice of apple pie if I blow you how does she do that Sandra seemed to have the ability to mask herself she will show small glimpses of the real woman inside but that would be gone in an instant she built several personas to hide from the world and she was able to switch effortlessly between them the sex kitten the hard-nosed or the smirking sarcastic girl who wasn't easily impressed she used them as a suit of armor she encased herself into them Shield up sword drawn and always prepared for defense
most people wouldn't care to get past those Illusions the sex kitten makes men only want to screw her brains out the hard-nosed causes them to want to stay clear of her and the sarcastic woman just makes them not want to even try to get to know her I decided to not be like other men like I said before I got her I could see past the exterior shell because of that I would be able to tread those Dangerous Waters despite her reluctance to let me in I found her intriguing enough to try have you ever
been in love I asked she stiffened up at the question like it surprised her she couldn't hide the gloomy expression on her face that mirrored her feelings when I asked it after seeing how she reacted a yes or no answer was irrelevant only a person who is loved got burned and lost could feel the emotion that would make such a beautiful face look so sad so far we'd only talked about me I wanted to ask her about her past she was right about one thing I did wonder how a woman like her got on the
path to being a stripper who also slept with men for money she didn't seem like the type if we check our stereotypes for stripper hookers then I'm sure we will all come up with some bubble-headed sex addict who craves sex or some gold digging F fatal who would probably kill you to get your wallet if given the chance Sandra played those parts to Perfection but they were just that Parts like an actress does for a movie or play I could see that it it was all an act of self-preservation underneath that exterior was so much
more her eyes glazed over as a memory haunted her she shook it off like she did everything else and changed the subject well Frank I'm going to turn back into a pumpkin soon I have to get home and get to sleep 5:00 a.m. is way past my bedtime her redirection of my attention worked but only because I didn't realize how late it was holy it's 5 I asked checking my watch it was indeed where had the time gone yep time flies when you're with me I have that effect on people it's because I'm awesome she
said as she shot me a smile frustrating is more like it we spent all night talking about me and I don't know the slightest thing about you there it was again a flash of the real Sandra I saw it in her eyes but just for that initial moment she refused to let her guard down that mask was back well you could have known all about me if you wanted to handsome she said playfully as she waved her hands across her body like she was putting it on display you know that's not what I mean right
then her demeanor changed her eyes softened right before me her face became more innocent it's going to cost you a lot more than $300 for that she said there was no humor in her voice no sarcasm that was the real Sandra speaking what about $300 and breakfast I joked lightly that got a genuine laugh out of her not the throaty seductive laugh that she does is St Scarlet or one filled with cynicism when I say something sappy it was a real laugh Frank we need to go I need sleep some of us have to work
for a living she said clamming up once more she slid out of the booth and grabbed her purse indicating that there was no room for negotiation and that this conversation was over um I do work a lot that's the main reason my wife left me well when you do your job in 6-in heels and a thong We compare notes for some reason the of me in heels and a thong was hilarious it must have been funny to her too because we laughed together touche was all I could say the waitress must have sensed that we
were ready to go because she showed up with the check after I thanked her I placed a $5 tip on the table and went to pay the bill the drive back to the club was a short one from where we were after a few minutes I was parked next to her jeda Pat well Frank it's been a while since a man has lasted all night with me you have some stamina she joked once again using her go to move of injecting a sexual reference into every conversation but I wasn't going for it I wasn't going
to let her sweep tonight under the rug with playful banter Sandra you helped me tonight I don't let that many people get close to me but I'm glad I let you in thank you for being here for the first time tonight her guard was completely dropped she genuinely looked me in the eyes anytime Frank I hope everything works out for you you're a good guy you deserve better with that she kissed me softly on the lips and got out of my car it wasn't a passionate kiss the kind shared Between Two Lovers it was a
soft Peck a kiss one might give a friend I watched her get into her car drive off then I drove back to my hotel room I figured that I would get my room for an extra night I might as well sleep in a big king-sized bed for a change when I went asleep I slept like the dead I was exhausted but for the first time in a while I felt an ebb in the pain it wasn't the mask of anger that I'd been wearing lately to convince myself that this didn't phase me I actually felt
it subside like I released the pressure and got rid of the excess I felt like I can finally start healing Frank you awake cla's voice sounded apprehensive as she knocked on my office door it was about a week after my evening with Sandra when I returned to my house after my nights in the hotel room I felt that I had turned a corner I had Clarity my future didn't look so Bleak anymore I also found it amusing that Clare questioned where I was and why I was coming in at that time of morning like I
owed her anything of course I let her know that my night was completely innocent and that she could rest assured that I didn't have sex with anyone you're right I simply brushed her off and left her standing there I didn't care what she thought I began preparing to leave my home I rented a storage unit and began moving some of my things into it I also started looking for another place to stay at this time I was actually choosing between a condo that was close to my job in a townhouse that was a couple of
blocks down from Claire and my girls I felt like I was finally seeing the light at the end of the tunnel then tonight happened what's is it Claire I asked in a deadpan voice I really didn't want to see her still she took my acknowledgement of her as an invitation and came into my office I swiveled around in my chair to face her she looked like she'd been balling her face was stained as if it was freshly dried of tears from her puffy eyes I was just checking on you seeing how you were seeing how
I was isn't that sweet well in all truthfulness I was pissed at her you see tonight was the night we decided to break the news to the girls about Mommy and Daddy how do you explain to a five and an 8-year-old that the parents are splitting up how do you reiterate that they will see Daddy even though he will be at another house how do you tell them that they will still be a family and that nothing will change very painfully and with a lot of tears and I had to put my daughters through that
screw CLA and her unhappiness so you can imagine the joy I felt at hearing her voice when she knocked on my door I'm just Peach thanks for asking Frank what Claire what what do you want from me I lashed out as I threw a pin that I'd been holding in my hand onto the desk behind me I threw it with a little too much force because it skitted across it and over the edge you wanted freedom I gave you that you wanted half of everything except what she didn't know about I gave you that alimony
child support my children I gave you everything you wanted what else can I give you please tell me what more I can do to help you you I just wanted to talk I laughed sardonically talk oh now you want to talk well better late than never unfortunately I'm all out of talks with you you see I had to break my daughter's Hearts today I had to tell them that Mommy and Daddy can't get their together and Mommy screwed her husband's best friend and now their entire family is destroyed so no I don't have any sympathy
left to give you if you want someone to make you feel better then you have to find a guy who doesn't give a WEA or not your decision to break this family hurts Kelly and Stacy I'm not that guy you should go find your boyfriend he couldn't care less she looked at me incredulously do you have to be like this now of all times to be an a-hole you couldn't take a break just this once to be a human being I was there too I was sitting right next to you when we told our daughters
about our divorce I know you're hurting Frank I know that because I'm hurting too I burst out who gives a if you're hurting I could give a damn what you're going through right now you made this shitty bed and we're all laying in it so go find Doug spread your legs and ask him to piston you to zero to 100 he was so helpful when you were getting over your husband he provided a piston to Slob on I'm sorry a nice shoulder to cry on when you needed help brushing me under the rug I'm sure
he can do the same thing to help you forget about the pain that you put your daughters through we both put them through hell Frank we both had a part in this yeah I work too hard you screwed my best friend all is not created equal in here you want to kid yourself fine but you must be on some serious drugs if you think I'm going to play along with the I was a lonely excuse you're an a-hole she said as she got up and stomped out of my office at least I'm not a characterless
cheater I yelled out after she slammed the door I didn't get a response but I'm sure she heard me was I being childish sure I could admit that did it feel good no not really my adolescent Behavior was just a way to vent my real frustration the pain of looking your kids in the eyes and shattering their worlds is Agony that can only be compared with similar pain getting shot stabbed or burned isn't even comparable that night with Sandra I took two steps forward in getting past the bitterness that I felt at Clare tonight I
took a giant leap backwards and I had a running start no longer was the Betrayal about me now it had spread the curse of hiding the state of our marriage from our daughters until now was that we were also hiding it from ourselves anytime before now we could call quits and turn back sure we be fractured probably never be the same loving couple that we had been but we could have faked the funk long enough for the girls to mature now there was no reason to turn around and go back the damage was complete the
next day at work I was called into a meeting with the heads again I groaned out loud when Sarah gave me that bit of news we already had a meeting not too long ago what could they possibly want this soon you need to calm down Mr Underwood you know how they are a bunch of pencil pushers don't let them see your frustration Sarah told me trying to calm me down what else could they want I just gave them a progress report nothing more has been done since then God why can't I just do the job
and be left alone she looked thoughtful for a moment and then leaned in I don't think this is about the engine she seemed as if she were holding on to a juicy bit of information and she was debating on whether or not to spill the beans okay I was intrigued when it came to this company the assistants are really the ones who ran and everything they talked amongst themselves Sarah often knew things long before I did what could this be about I asked she knew she had me on the hook because she smiled slightly your
old friend Mr Stamper Doug she nodded knowingly from the smirk on her face and her demeanor I wondered how much she actually knew about my situation previous to this she didn't make any indication that she knew anything she knew I was getting a divorce because she pointed me in the direction of Terry but I never shared the specifics with her but now she was speaking with me like we were co- conspirators against Doug did she know how then again how does she learn half of the that she knew why would they be meeting with me
about him her voice lowered I heard that he stole some Secrets when he left I think they want to sue him or something like that I'm not sure I can't say that it hurt me to hear that Doug had a bit of bad luck coming his way if I'm honest it actually brightened up my day a little still I couldn't imagine Doug doing that it wasn't a question of his loyalty or his ethics he had none of those I just didn't think he was that stupid why would they question me about it she Shrugged her
shoulders at me and looked like she was about to say something else but then stopped she looked past me like someone was coming up behind me excuse me I'm looking for a Frank Underwood I heard from behind me the voice was male and he sounded young I turned to find some it looking guy I'm Frank how can I help you from the corner of my eye I saw Sarah casually brush a strand of hair out of her face she looked at this guy like a teenage girl does the Hot Shot quarterback for the high school
hi my name is Jason Morrison I'm with company we're contracted to do security upgrades I was told to meet with you really since when are we getting a security upgrade well we're the company that put your security system in 5 years ago we've been doing the maintenance on it since then according to this he pulled out a piece of paper and read from it you guys have also contracted us to perform several upgrades to your system I'm the guy that is supposed to do the initial assessment I vaguely remembered the new security system getting put
in I was the point of contact when it was installed which is probably why he was looking for me now I remembered speaking to some other guy though an older fatter guy wait a minute I remember your company the guy in charge was some ex-navy guy who looked like he never missed a meal the young guy chuckled you mean Bernie yeah he hasn't missed a meal ever in fact he eats several other people's meals when they turn their backs I looked over at Sarah who giggled at the joke like it was the funniest things she'd
heard since Kevin Hart was on Ellen by now she was practically scribbling Mrs Sarah Morrison in her notebook with hearts around it I almost expected her to start panting and whistling with her heartshaped eyes popping out of her head like a cartoon wolf well Jason I'm glad to have you I'm going to be terribly busy and I won't be able to guide you around he looked perplexed um that's going to be a problem I'm actually going to need a point of contact I'll be needing passwords security logs and a lot of other things once I
get going I'll be fine my team will come in here and do the upgrades and we practically be invisible but for the first couple of days I'll need someone who can point me in the right direction the first couple of days how long is this upgrade supposed to take about a week I saw one of the heads trying to get my attention he had a serious expression on his face whatever they wanted me for it wasn't good look Mr Morrison I'm sure that my assistant Sarah here can get you anything you need I have an
urgent meeting to go as well as a mountain of work to do if she needs anything she can give me a call is that okay with you Sarah um sure I'll stick around to help him out by the looks of things she didn't seem to be inconvenienced one bit good I'll be seeing you both later with that I made my exit I almost laughed to myself it kind of reminded me of when I first met CLA love in the beginning it starts off as mere infatuation fluttering of the eyes sped up beating of the heart
so wonderful in the beginning until it all turns to I was ushered into the boardroom and seated before the heads this meeting was definitely not for a progress report along with the normal players I saw Terry and a couple of other lawyer types sitting before all of the major people in your company is intimidating enough when they bring in a lawyer then the anxiety gets amped up a notch good morning Mr Underwood as you know my name is Terrence Ross the reason we are here is because we have a couple of questions about an old
associate of yours a Mr Douglas Stamper the two of you worked together for years before he left you even became really good friends do you remember him Terry knew Dam while I remembered him I'd spilled my entire story out to him but I knew that he was only doing his job spelling things out was not only for me but for all present including the stenographer who was furiously typing away yes I remember him we did work together and he was my friend but I haven't spoken to him in several months now can I ask what
this is about I half expected Terry to bring up Doug's involvement in my divorce but he didn't he treated whatever this was in my case as if they were two separate entities do you recognize this he asked as he slid a piece of paper over to me I grabbed it and looked at for a brief second it's a schematic I said as if everyone should have already known what it was no one seemed blown away by my Revelation thank you for that Mr Underwood but I need you to take a second look at it what
is it a schematic of I looked closer and my heart almost dropped Panic started to set in I recognized this schematic it was the one that dug and I stole from that other inter when we were fighting for jobs here the one for the new propulsion system this was Donald schematic what is this doing here um I've probably seen this somewhere before but I couldn't put my finger on it why are you asking me this I asked nervously this was not good at all past sins coming back to haunt me well we believe that Mr
Stamper developed this system while he was employed here using our equipment to do so he patented the design but it doesn't stop the fact that he came up with it using our resources his company just released the plan to launch this new system later on this year and Doug is the one who designed it if this is true then we can make a case about this system belonging to us wait a minute are you telling me that Doug developed this yes and he got it patented not too long ago this surprises you I sat there
flabbergasted for a moment this wasn't about my sins this was all about Doug they wanted to know if Doug came up with this design while he worked here but Doug didn't come up with the design at all Donald did we stole his design in an effort to keep him from having a leg up on us but we never planned on using it at least I didn't the motive behind stealing it wasn't to use it for ourselves but to keep him from being able to wow a company with it and clinch his spot I assumed that
after Doug and I were hired that he would take his design to another company but Doug was supposed to email it to him after things blew over he did email it back didn't he I racked my brain but I didn't actually witness Doug doing that I just presumed he did because that was part of the plan we just wanted to make it difficult for him to get to his work for the moment not steal it all together but apparently Doug had other ideas he actually passed it off as his own now the company wanted to
know if I had any knowledge that Doug had designed it here this left me with a huge moral dilemma do I screw over the man who screwed me over H tough choice I was about to open my mouth but then stopped tougher Choice do I screw him over or royally screw him over I could say that Doug came up with those designs while he worked here or I could say that he stole them from Donald one would get him sued the other would probably get him blackballed from ever working again as an engineer and then
Su did I want that on my conscience Doug being forced to give up his career and face punishment for a crime that we both committed I thought back to that morning when I was touching Claire's waist then she called out his name I also thought back to that day in Doug's office when he self-righteously justified his betrayal putting it off on me I didn't deserve CLA he said sanctimoniously when he professed his love for her apparently I didn't deserve a best friend either my conscience will be fine I do recognize this schematic Mr Ross but
Doug didn't come up with this drawing when he was employed here another intern did Doug stole this from him I swear the entire room gasped collectively no one including Terry expected that bit of information so you're telling us that Mr Stamper stole this design from another employee that used to work here went to another place of employment and passed this off as his own one of the heads asked Terry eyed me with a bit of Suspicion but he didn't say anything yes that's exactly what I'm saying the stenographer was typing at warp speed the clicking
of her fingers as they punched our every word was constant who is this in turn another one of the heads asked his name was Donald I don't remember his last name come to think of it I never knew his last name did you witness Mr Stamper stealing this schematic Terry chimed in he looked at me wearily as he said this it could see him trying to pass me an unspoken message warning me to tread lightly yes I saw him do it I could see Terry went involuntarily the rest of the room muttered for a few
seconds and then fell silent just to be certain that we are understanding you correctly let me repeat it back to you you were saying that you are an eyewitness to the crime of Mr Stamper stealing this schematic from an intern named Donald Terry was choosing his words very carefully emphasizing the ones that he wanted me to pay close attention to iwitness and crime were the ones that his pitch and tone changed with when he said them yes that is what I'm saying even through his professional demeanor Terry fell slightly at that admission I could tell
he disapproved with my course of action but he had a job to do and I was on my own now tell us about the time you witnessed Mr Stamper stealing this design Terry said returning to the LA lawyer that he was his trained interrogation voice was unwavering and even I decided to go with the truth the only part of the story that I changed was that instead of both of us stealing the design I just had Doug doing it the entire time I was talking Terry was taking notes so to reiterate Terry said reading from
his notebook you Mr Stamper and Donald the intern decided to go out for drinks the three of you became inebriated and drove to Donald the intern's place of residence then Mr Stamper steals this schematic that we have shown you by emailing it to himself and attempts to destroy the personal laptop of Donald the intern so that there is no evidence of its creation is this correct Mr Underwood yes that's correct did you have knowledge beforehand that Mr Stamper planned on stealing this design this was a sticky one so far everything else has been the truth
with one detail changed it flowed out so effortlessly because all I had to do was recount the events of that night Doug did steal the design so it was easy to simply tell the truth however this question posed a problem if I said yes then I make myself an accomplice if I said no then that could come back to haunt me undoubtedly Doug would be questioned when he was all he would have to do is throw me under the bus with him if I was found out to be telling a blatant lie it could discredit
me I decided to go with the truth sort of yes I knew he planned on stealing it we were in competition for the remaining two jobs here it was down to the three of us when we learned that Donald was going to present this design as his ticket to one of those jobs we knew that would clinch him a spot Doug felt that between the two of us he was the weakest candidate so when we decided to go out for drinks he told me that he planned to make it so that Donald didn't have the
schematic to show you I warned him not to do it told him that we would find some other way to beat Donald but he knew that once you guys saw that schematic he was done for so when we brought Donald back to his apartment Doug started going through his laptop I don't even know how he got past the passcode I ALS o didn't know that he planned to destroy the laptop or that he was planning to pass off the design as his own the nods all around showed that they believed me even Terry looked convinced
it was easy enough to pass off because about 95% of it was true separating Donald from his designs isn't a crime having knowledge of that would get me a slap on the wrist destroying the laptop is a little more serious I had to distance myself from that Doug stealing the design and passing it off as his own that was all his dumb mistake well Mr Underwood thank you for your honesty we will make contact with this Donald Guy to corroborate your story and we will make our decision I know that it must be hard to
testify against one that you call a friend even Terry almost cracked a smile on that one but we thank you he shot me a brief smirk as if to say you lucky son of a I returned his look with an innocent one that said who me if we can use this to challenge the patent and get it revoked we may be able to get that design for ourselves we need to to find this Donald Guy immediately if he has anything that could bring it into question we can use that one of the heads said I
could practically hear the wheels turning well he emailed the design to himself he may have used his company email address I'm not sure but if he did that's a start isn't it I offered trying to give whatever help I could they nodded and mumbled some more hey I just wanted Justice for my company that's all my willingness to help out had nothing to do with sticking it to that snaky backstabbing son of a Scouts Honor who cares if I wasn't a Boy Scout tell me Frank could this be used to solve the current problems we
are having with our engine another one asked me I took a look at it and saw the possibilities maybe I'm not sure but if we got Donald on our team I'm sure he'd be a big help anyone who could come up with this is sure to bring something else to the table I saw Smiles all around me when it comes to making money they will be nothing but smiles hell they were practically jerking themselves off under the table stopping the development of one of our competitors was sure to equal Big Time dollar signs for them
taking a design that would have brought them to the next level and making it our own the ching and I was the guy who placed the mouse in the tank with the python about a week went by until I heard anything else about it by this time I had settled on making a bid for the townhouse that was close to my girls I was afraid that if I moved to the condo that was closer to my job then my predisposition to overwork would cause me to lose sight of what was really important important out of
sight out of mind but if I lived closer to my girls then my feet would stay grounded I would have to pass by my old house every morning on the way to work and coming back from work that would be my daily reminder to make time for the two most precious things I own sometimes true strength is being honest about your weaknesses and heading them off I was actually out with my girls at an amusement park when I got the phone call imagine my surprise when I saw my screen light up with Doug's name my
girls were inhaling Sugar by The Grahams eating crazy bread and drinking a large soda so I was able to slip away from the table I knew this conversation had a high likelihood of not being kid-friendly I went to a spot that was close enough for me to still watch them but out of earshot so that I would be free to converse with the backstabbing a-hole without having to censor myself what do you want Doug I asked curtly when I answered the call you scumsucker I know it was you that snitched about that schematic well well
well I guess the board reached out to him I couldn't help it I had to rub his face in it Doug you seem angry is there a problem you're a backstabbing a-hole you know that no wonder your wife left you under normal circumstances that would have made me angry but now knowing what was ahead for Doug I felt calm I saw it for what it was a desperate attempt to bait me from a fallen man hello pot I said with an even tone huh what the hell are you talking about come on Doug do I
really have to explain the whole pot calling the kettle black thing do you really want to compare notes on backstabbing besides you were the one stupid enough to try to pass off someone else's work as your own I just told them what I knew we both did that a-hole you know it you made it out to seem like I did it on my own I didn't want to admit anything that could be used against me with technology being what it was he could have easily been recording still I wanted to torture him Doug Doug Doug
I laughed please don't bring me into your quicksand of stupidity I didn't try to use stolen schematics to boost my career I'm smart enough to do it with my own work while you were busy seducing my wife I was working the two of you made that abundantly clear if you had spent less time getting into Claire's pants and more time at your job maybe you wouldn't have needed to sink so low that design was the only reason that job hired me you already had your promotion I was just trying to get mine his voice sounded
anxious I would have felt bad for him if I wasn't enjoying his misery so much well you got it congratulations look at the bright side of all this Doug now you'll have a lot more time to tell Claire how wonderful she is you don't have to worry about becoming a workaholic like me isn't that great he started to say something but then he stopped himself I think he decided to switch tactics because when he spoke again his voice was softer he was practically pleading Frank please this is my livelihood I know you don't like me
but we used to be friends you don't understand that this could follow me for life I may not be able to get another job with this on my record we can settle what I did to you another way you're not this guy you're not like me don't let my actions change who you are you're better than me oh God did he really sink to graving he must be desperate I'm better than him this was almost too good to be true what I did next was cruel I admit it but in my defense it felt great
okay you're right I'll go talk to the board in the morning I'll tell them that I made a mistake we can settle things between us another way the only thing I ask is that you stop seeing CLA he was stunned for a moment he was quiet so long I almost thought we got disconnected what did you say I'll tell the board that I made a mistake I'll lie for you but only if you stop seeing CLA I could feel his heart drop on the other end of the phone but you two are divorced and you're
the reason for it you once told me that I didn't deserve CLA because I chose work over her now you get to make the same choice you get to prove your claim that you are the better man for for her than me if you forfeit her I'll save your job or you can keep seeing her the choice is yours was I actually planning on speaking to the board hell no even if I wanted to it was out of my hands now the heads had that juicy steak in their mouths and there was no way they
were letting go but I was curious he pronounced his love for her I wanted to see how deep that love actually ran are you actually using this to break us up really that's low Frank you're not that low I was tired of him trying to appeal to my benevolent nature to manipulate me to make things better for him the first time it was funny now it was irritating I wanted to burst his bubble Doug you screwed my wife you took my family from me so please stop saying how much better than you I am I
already know that I don't steal things that don't belong to me and try to make it my own I do my own work I got my own wife you you're a pathetic bottom feeder who can't get anything by himself when we were interns both of us knew that you were the one in danger of not Landing the job don't pretend like it's not true so now I'm giving you the chance to make a choice to man up and actually sacrifice for what you really believe in so dump CLA keep your job or not the choice
is yours Frank ticktock Doug Tick Tock things fell quiet once again I could practically hear him deliberating on the other end as the seconds passed I actually thought he would choose CLA then finally he softly said okay you win what was that I'm sorry I couldn't hear you over the hypocrisy you'll have to speak up you win a-hole okay I'll give up CLA are you happy a Sinister smile spread across my face you see there that wasn't so hard apparently you don't deserve Claire either you're a stupid scum sucker Frank I know so are you
I want you to think about that when you're jobless what please you didn't actually think I would help you did you God you really are stupid have a nice life Doug don't ever call me again you mother I ended the call with the biggest smile on my face then I strolled over to my daughters so who's up for more rides me their happy squeals greeted me as they rushed over each one grabbed a hand as they dragged me away from the eating area toward the rides today was such a beautiful day weeks went by ped
Along by my kids my job and the back and forth battle of closing on the townhouse I was in a bidding war with a young couple who were expecting twins they were just starting out they even had a dog how quaint they had their hearts set on the townhouse it was exactly like the one the wife grew up in I could sympathize with that bit of nostalgia but for me I was fighting for my girls I didn't want to turn into the absentee dad that I once was for me this house was a first step
I had chosen this house to be closer to my girls rather than the condo that was closer to my job the symbolism of that alone made this place Priceless to me they were determined but so was I so I upped my bid by another couple of thousand I was prepared to go higher still even if I paid more than the house was worth I would be getting my money's worth one evening I was sitting in my office eating a meal that Claire had prepared it was good one thing that I would definitely miss was her
cooking when we first married she didn't even know how to boil eggs I'm exaggerating but her cooking skills left a lot to be desired over time she gathered recipes from the internet random cookbooks and from other stay atome ladies she was determined to be a good wife and a good mother now she was a whiz in the kitchen I found it odd that she still cooked for me even though we were divorced I guess it wasn't too odd seeing that I still lived in the same house for the time being still one would expect for
her to cut off all wiely duties to the husband that she no longer loved Frank can we talk I heard her say a moment after the creek of my office door let me know that someone was opening it sure I said as I placed my plate on the desk and turned around in my seat CLA entered my office and sat down on my couch come bed she seemed to be trying to say something but nothing was coming then she started stammering I I just God this is hard I had a whole speech planned I sat
confused for a moment just say what you want to say tears started streaming down her face I just wanted to tell you how sorry I am for everything I screwed everything up she sat there and cried for a moment I grabbed some hand tissues from out of a box on my desk and handed them to her she used them to wipe her nose I know I was wrong for what I did with Doug I knew it then I was just so unhappy that I stopped thinking about what it would do to my family I just
wanted to do something that would make me feel better it was a mistake the first time we got too drunk and then I nodded I didn't want to hear the rest of that statement but after that I just thought it could be short fling something to get me through I trusted him because I knew him so well he was nice to me easy to talk to I thought that you didn't want me so there was no harm then he told me he that loved me things got all messy after that because you fell in love
with him too she nodded and cried some more I let that digest not really what she said but how it affected me better yet how it didn't affect me the Searing pain that would have been there months ago at that statement simply wasn't there when I realized that I loved him the unhappiness that I felt with you grew but to tell you the truth I still loved you I didn't really plan on leaving you that night that I told you I was unhappy I planned on telling you that I was having an affair and that
we should try to work on our marriage I didn't want to break up the family but it came out wrong things got Twisted in the end I just went along with it you'll have to excuse me if I find that a little hard to believe CLA you say you didn't plan on leaving me but if I recall I asked you if you wanted to stay with me she sniffled again I know and the truth of the matter was that I would have fought for the marriage for the kid's sake if you would have but I
was also okay with it ending I thought about that for a moment I tried recalling our conversations to see if that rang true it could have but then again who knows you didn't say that I don't know if it would have changed our paths any you know with you having slept with my best friend but it could have now we'll never know she nodded sadly and wiped her nose again yeah I know but I wanted to tell you how sorry I am for everything you didn't deserve that no matter what you did you deserved better
than that I I regret the choices that I made I handled our marriage like an adolescent if I could do one thing over it would be coming to you before I made the choice to cheat with Doug trying to make you understand how I was feeling suggesting counseling or something like that I'm not certain it could have saved us but I owed it to our marriage and our kids to try I just wanted to say that to you I appreciate that it means a lot to me and it did for the first time I felt
that she really understood what she did to me of course she could never really know how it felt unless it happened to her having your heart ripped out by two trusted friends is a feeling that can't be compared but she at least understood the depths of her betrayal in the end that's all I can ask for she can't make up for what she put me through but most of the time all we really want is for someone hear us to really take a look outside of themselves and see what we see if I may ask
what brought about this change heart she Shrugged her shoulders I don't know when I first read our divorce papers I couldn't escape the fact that it was my doing when we had to tell the girls I felt that same feeling I came to you that night to talk to you and you threw it in my face I get it though I was angry with myself so I knew you must have been furious with me I just thought it was time for me to own up to my part and to not make excuses anymore I won't
be able to get past this and forgive myself if I don't you know I nodded in agreement yeah I was there once too when I realized how much I neglected you and the girls she smiled at me through her tears yeah you've been trying really hard I recognize that and I'm so happy for you our girls are loving the extra attention you're a great dad even when you were gone all of the time you were still a loving father yeah and even though you were a cheating you were a good mother to our girls we
may have been shitty spouses but we have to Pat ourselves on the back for those too they are living proof that we aren't complete screw-ups she laughed at that and then she stood up and grabbed my hand pulling me up from my chair we ended up hugging I believe that was the moment I began to forgive her truly forgive her I realized that I was healing I didn't feel anything when she told me that she fell in love with Doug no anger no hurt just a sense of nostalgic remorse for what was once a happy
marriage a woman that I was once in love with now she was the mother of my kids for that I will always care about her she will always be in my life morning Sarah I said as I breezed past her morning Mr Underwood she said cheerily her smile was spread from ear to ear Sarah was naturally a cheery person but this morning she seemed to have something extra I had to stop and ask Sarah you seem to be glowing particularly brightly today what has you so happy she beamed as she looked up from her computer
oh nothing just went out on a date last night now I was interested a date with who no one from here I hope you're way too good to be dating one of these nerds she giggled like a giddy school girl no I went out with Jason Jason are you talking about the security upgrade guy I asked surprised she smiled broadly and nodded vigorously I saw every last one of her teeth I take it went well what I didn't know was that statement was the opening that she was looking for she told me practically everything he
used to be in the Navy was divorced had a daughter and apparently was skilled in the bedroom she didn't tell me the last part she didn't have to judging by the smile on her face when she said that he cooked breakfast for her it didn't take person of my genius to do simple math well I'm happy for you you really deserve it I meant it Sarah was a great woman over the years I come to depend on her I tend to get so engrossed in the engineering side of things that if it were left up
to me everything else would fall apart on top of that she always had a bright disposition that radiated throughout the office thank you boss and if I may I wanted to say that I am truly sorry for how things turned out for you I respect how you've handled things most people would have become a tyrant to everyone around him but you didn't you knew about my situation with Doug she nodded of course I did I didn't talk about it with you because you didn't seem to want to discuss it I tried to keep people who
would bombard you with questions about it at a distance I had to have a talk with your in turn though he kept stupidly bringing your wife up for a genius that Thomas can be a real dummy you know one of these days we're going to have a discussion about exactly how it is that you always know what's going on she she winked and smiled sinisterly I'll never tell I made my way down to the lab to check on the latest developments of the engine we've been making progress in solving the problems but not enough so
that there was anything to report I was pleased with my team's dedication but I was disappointed that we weren't making any Headway however I was excited to see if the heads could actually get the patent revoked for that design if they could and we could get Donald and it on the team then things would get really interesting the rest of the day was filled with adjustments test runs more adjustments and more test runs before I knew it it was about 8:00 I had to get home in time to see my girls before they went to
bed as I made my way to the parking lot towards my car I felt someone behind me I turned just in time to get tackled and thrown to the ground you backstabbing a hole you ruined my life I heard as I was punched over and over again surprisingly the punches didn't hurt I think they were supposed to land on my face but they just kept hitting my ear and bouncing off I was able to protect self and push him off of me I scrambled to my feet and I found Doug Breathing heavily with his fists
still clenched rage and fire filled his eyes as his nostrils flared like a bull you maggot Donald is suing me for stealing his work and your company is using him to revoke the patent they giving him a job at your company in exchange he is going to give them the design my design this is all your fault with that he lunged at me again I know this is the part where I tell you that I effortlessly used my secret Kung Fu SK skills to render him unconscious a swift Jason Stam move delivered with smooth accuracy
and Bone crunching results then I stand over him with my foot on his chest and say some snarky oneliner with a British accent but no I'm not a fighter neither is Doug we're a couple of middle-aged Engineers who had never actually been in a real fight however there is a lot to be said about a man with pinup rage a man who's had to suppress his baser instincts of violence and revenge for months swallowing the urge to let go and release the Beast a man who was forced to ignore the need to release all of
the anger hurt pain and humiliation that was heaped upon Him by one who was close enough to his heart to nearly kill him with grief then the object of his wrath shows up with nothing in between them but an open parking lot and a whole lot of hostility like a gift wrapped treasure from Santa nice and pretty under the tree almost sounds like there is a God after all so while a man may not be Fighter the concept is simple enough for him to figure out fist goes here all he needs is the right motivation
to do so that I had and droves so I hit him again and again and it felt marvelous but with every action comes an opposite reaction the e to the yangong there is a reason why smart people don't fight there is a flip side to it hitting a person is awesome anyone who tells you that it isn't hasn't been angry enough to need that release however getting hit not so awesome in movies like The Transporter the bad guy gets hit one time falls off screen and isn't seen again until the camera pans to show him
and his buddies unconscious in real life when you hit a guy he hits you back and it hurts when I was bald up on the ground my face was somewhat protected from the blows I think that filled me with a false confidence when I was standing those hits didn't quite bounce off as painlessly so we fought mano a mano a couple of middle-aged nerds duking it out in the parking lot over a woman and a longtime friendship thrown in the toilet each of us threw pun is filled with hurt and regret trying to make the
other feel what we felt by translating those emotions into physical pain the fight may have lasted 5 minutes tops the two of us were so out of breath though you would have thought that we were Hector and achilles Troy reference next thing I knew security was pulling us apart Doug was irate the guard who was restraining him had to practically pin him to the ground to get him to stop the guard who was holding me back saw that I was the calmer of the two and warned me to stay put then he went assist his
partner with the Hostile one did I feel better yeah a little violence doesn't solve everything but does solve some things sometimes civility doesn't work check the history books or just look up any War but most importantly there are times when violence just feels good if it didn't guys would only watch romantic comedies when they went to the movies Superman Batman and Wonder Woman would try to talk to Doomsday get him to open up Jason Bourne would have a civilized meeting with the spies trying to kill him Kenny Rogers had it right sometimes you have to
fight when you're a man every once in a while a man just needs to knuckle up my face hurt and I probably will have some swelling in my right hand but I did feel like I needed to get that out I know that sounds like machismo it probably is but at that moment I felt like the Victor adding to my delight was watching the guards manhandle dug while he shouted obscenities at me it was oddly funny it was humorous enough to keep me from doing anything stupid like running over there and trying to continue this
fight for me my fight with Doug was over seeing my amused face only enraged him more which made him act more irrationally this in turn made them have to use more force on him which only added to the humor and my entertainment a vicious cycle in the end he only calmed down when they told him that they would have him arrested if he didn't leave immediately so he was forced to leave with his tail between his legs they further warned him that I they saw him on the property again they would have him arrested for
trespassing damn how that for karma there was a time when the shoe was on the other foot I was about to be arrested for going to his house and his office to confront him about stabbing me in the back he had homec court advantage then now funny how life Works a month later I won an entirely different kind of fight I won the bidding war I wound up paying close to $10,000 over the asking price but it was worth it I was the proud new owner at three bedroom 1.5bath townhouse it wasn't as big as
the house that I shared with Claire and My Girls once upon upon a time but it was the most beautiful thing I'd seen in a while there wasn't much of a front yard but the backyard that I shared with my next door neighbor was pretty decent plus there was a really nice park right down the street there was even a new bike trail that was just built it led all of the way down to the beach after I closed on the house the keys were handed to me the house belonged to me moving day was
actually Bittersweet I was excited to finally end this chapter of my life and start the new one yet I was nervous about what lie ahead luckily I had friend to help me through it Terry was helping me load up the things that Claire and I packed I wouldn't go as far as to say that we were going to be lifelong buddies but he is the one person who understood where I was coming from granted he played a bit more of an active role in marriage's demise but that doesn't do anything to quell the feeling of
being cast aside if anything it amplifies it because you know that it was your fault plus he was a daily reminder to me that I wasn't as bad of a husband as he was hey I'm still human we can have our selfish motives about things so this is it Claire said when I moved the last box into the moving truck her eyes misted it up a little but no tears were falling yet yep I'm finally out of your hair a tear finally came down her cheek yay she joked weakly as she wiped it quickly in
that moment I caught a glimpse of the CLA I married all of those years ago I missed her but Life Changes people that CLA wasn't here anymore neither was the man who married her too many things have happened to bridge that Gap now the two people standing here were older wiser and better versions of themselves than the two who first married but their journey together had ended you know Claire I just realized that I never once apologized to you after everything that happened I got so caught up in you and Doug that I didn't stop
to think that you needed an apology for me well it's an understandable oversight considering she looked down and shifted from side to side as her thoughts plagued her I lightly grabbed her chin and lifted it until she was looking me in the eyes Claire I'm sorry for neglecting you all of those years you deserved a better husband the tears really started streaming down her face then I grabbed her in for a hug she embraced me crying on my shoulder well at least you don't have to worry about the toilet seat being left up I joked
to lighten the mood she gave a weak laugh as we let each other go she walked with me to the driver side of the truck we stood there for a moment it looked like she was about to say something but she stopped her a few times then she finally said Frank you can't cook worth I don't want you starving to death over there since you're right down the street I wouldn't mind if you came over to eat sometimes she said as she watched me anxiously I didn't respond right away so she quickly added it would
be good for the girls I don't think that would be a good idea the last thing either of us need is for me to come over for dinner to find Doug there that wouldn't be good for anyone especially Doug oh um you don't have to worry about Doug he and I are no longer seeing each other that was a bit of news I couldn't say that I was upset at hearing it what happened if you mind me asking no it's fine me and Doug were kind of doomed from the start I mean I do love
him and I believe that he loves me but we didn't do ourselves any favors by starting things out like we did then when things started going bad with his patent he became filled with so much anger and hatred towards you not to mention the two of you pinheads acting like Mayweather and Pacquiao behaving like a couple of juvenile delinquents I was Mayweather I joked her face Twisted into a playful smirk what obnoxious and full of himself haha hilarious have you gotten funnier since we divorced whatever Slugger anyway it's really put a strain on things I
just can't have that kind of negativity around the girls you know you are their father and they love you I don't think he can accept that and become a conducive to our lives she started crying and I grabbed her in for another hug her arms wrapped around my back as she squeezed me when we finally let go she wiped her tears again I know that this is going to sound self-serving but you did the right thing Doug isn't the guy for you I know that you feel that he was there for you but trust me
on this you're right when you say that your relationship was doomed from the start everything about it built on him helping you get over me all he had to do was be the complete opposite of me I honestly don't think the two of you actually knew each other I remembered the choice that I gave Doug and what he ended up choosing I could have brought that up to her but she didn't need that right now I hate to admit this but Doug and I are more alike than you think there's a reason why we were
best friends she smiled sadly and nodded her head thanks Frank I know you mean well but that doesn't help I silently nodded and said no more I just brushed my hand across her cheek before I opened the door and got into the truck I turned the ignition and the engine rumbled to life don't forget about dinner it's an opening invitation she said before I closed the door I smiled and nodded she took a step back as I pulled the heavy metal door shut and then put the truck and drive I watched as Clare waved goodbye
and I drove off to my new home after we get you moved in you owe me a beer Terry said from the passenger side sure thing Terry why don't we go get that beer in a Place full of TNA want to go to Mario's thinking of Marios made me think of Sandra it had been a few months since I last saw her that night at IHOP was still ingrained in my memory I thought about her from time to time nah I'm not in the mood for that I know a good sports bar though lead the
way the truth was I couldn't go to Mario's and see Sandra wearing a Starlet costume I really couldn't watch Terry or anyone else drool all over her I knew that person was a fake the flirtatious sex kitten wasn't who she was I felt a connection with her the first night I met her but that was built on the facade of Starlet the real connection that I made was when I sat with her in that restaurant watching her devour her plate or when I was back in the room crying my eyes out that was who intrigued
me the real Sandra was a complex creature who hid behind a stone cold mask but she wasn't Stone Cold a stone cold person wouldn't have held a complete stranger while he balded over his ex-wife or listened as that stranger told her all that he was going through no a person who does that has a good caring heart a heart that had probably been broken one time too many and had to retreat into a shell to protect itself yet it still cares it can't help it despite itself James if that's you buy my car you better
just walk away if I have to call Bruno out here things will go very badly trust me that never ends well starlet's voice shouted out into the darkness of the parking lot I held my hands up in the air and surrender Sandra I'm sorry for scaring you it's me I said quickly hoping that she recognized my voice Frank yeah I saw her visibly relax as she walked over to me what the hell are you doing lurking around my car it was dark outside seeing that it was about 2:00 in the morning but the street lights
as well as the illumination provided by Mario's large ostentatious glowing neon sign provided enough visibility that I could make out her face I didn't know of any other way to see you who the hell is James I swear that I saw a hint of a smile start before the scowl returned no one important why didn't you just come inside of the club I nervously stuck my hands in my pockets I don't know I guess I didn't want to see Starlet I wanted to see you Frank no Sandra just hear me out okay she stopped whatever
she was about to say and nodded look I feel something for you I don't know what it is but it's something you were there for me when I needed you Frank don't interrupt because I know what you're going to say you don't do the girlfriend experience you aren't built that way or some other excuse that you tell yourself to keep other people out but those are lies Sandra you know it she didn't say anything I waited for her to respond but I got nothing then she just brushed past me and started to get into her
car so you're just going to walk away she spun around and glared at me her face filled with Venom yes I'm going to walk away because I know how this story ends tell me what do you see for us a sweet courtship with roses and intimate dinners love making in the Moonlight after a romantic date becoming boyfriend and girlfriend then what you wake up in the morning and go to work when you come home from work that's when I'll go to my job here giving lap dances grinding on men and getting groped having men throw
dollar bills at me for a peak of my tits and then I come home crawl in bed with you and laugh as we talk about our hard days at work is that what you see for us I stood there quietly for a moment letting all of that sink in she continued are you going to introduce me to your parents your kids what will you tell them about me how we first first met I've been down this road Frank it doesn't end well not for me so yes I'm going to walk away I suggest you do
the same she got into her car and started it up just before she could back out of the parking space I jumped in her way get the hell out of the way Frank she yelled out of her window I stood my ground until she angrily got out of her car and stalked over to me Sandra look I don't know the answer to those questions okay but I feel something for you you feel it too if you didn't you wouldn't be so angry right now all I want is to get to know you that's all we
don't have to date we can just be friends but I want to see you some kind of way she stopped and glared at me for a moment then she crossed her arms and looked off to the side I didn't say anything more I just let her think she was still standing here instead of calling Bruno to come out and kick my butt so I knew I didn't have to say anything else God you're annoying she finally spit out Sue is that a yes I asked tentatively she didn't answer she just uncrossed her arms reached in
her pocket and grabbed her cell phone then she put in her passcode and handed it to me put your phone number in before I Chang my mind really yes hurry up it's already changing I smiled as I grabbed it from her and did as she asked her demeanor had softened some I could tell she still wasn't smiling but the anger that she felt a moment ago was gone she stood there with her hand on her hip but there was no irritation in her countenance you you promise to call me I asked as she snatched the
phone from my hands she just turned around and walked back to her car stop being a little girl I'll call you now move out of the way before I run you over she said over her shoulder right before she got into her car I moved out of the way and let her back up she passed me as she backed up then she stopped going in reverse and put the car in to drive however she didn't speed off right away I saw her shoot me a look it wasn't a smile exactly but the look lingered for
a moment longer than normal it wasn't Starlet looking at me not the cold or the sarcastic woman it was Sandra one of those rare glimpses of the girl inside but she caught it looked out of her windshield and drove off into the night dear listeners please share your thoughts in the comments section below and don't forget to like share and subscribe