how to be CONSISTENT | real mindset shifts and actions that WORK

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Tam Kaur
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Video Transcript:
but how can I be consistent the most commonly asked question I get I kid you not every day but why do we all struggle with consistency so much is it Tik Tok brain lock is it the fact that none of us are consistent or that we just have the shortest attention spance ever I struggled with this problem for so many years and after trying so many different methods in my personal life I have officially cracked the code which is exactly why I'm making this video to teach you how because the thing is we are not trying to live life we did last year okay cuz I don't know about you but I want every single thing on my vision board right over there to come true at the end of the year and you know how we're going to guarantee that we achieve our dream life and everything we want through consistency see consistency is the bridge between who you are right now and who you could be because when you commit yourself to something for a long time you're naturally going to change for the better so this video is the easy practical and Ultimate Guide to staying consistent in all of your endeavors so you can ensure that this year is not like any of the others before we get into it be sure to check out the description below because if you didn't know and if you're new here every single Channel I have on social media is dedicated to helping you level up into the best version of yourself I make one minute videos on Tik Tok every single day to do with self-development I have three different YouTube channels I have a podcast I just came out with my very own guided Journal it's called obsessed with growth and every single page strategically helps you grow into a better and elevated version of yourself I also wrote a book which is The Ultimate Guide to self- Lov and I even have a newsletter you can sign up to which sends you exclusive tips links to resources and all of the things that I use on a week toe basis on how you can also level yourself up and lastly I want to give a big thank you to skillshare who are kindly sponsoring this video if you've been watching my blog channel then you know I love to take skillshare classes in my free time but right now on skillshare I'm actually taking a productivity master class this class was created by none other than Ali abdall the absolute king of productivity and an amazing YouTuber and that's why I love platforms like skillshare because it gives me that easy and efficient ability to constantly be learning and discovering new methods that could very well and I mean have changed my life for the better if you didn't know skillshare is the largest online learning community for creatives with a wide depth and breadth of topics ranging from illustration graphic design photography to music marketing productivity and so much more classes are taught by industry experts who are so excited to share all of their tools expertise and Insider knowledge with you this way you get access to people's professional Journeys that have taken them years to master simply by sitting in your bedroom literally just watching a video on your laptop I love it but if you're a much more practical learner and you want to be really Hands-On and immerse yourself in the experience of learning your desired skill on skillshare then you are also going to love my favorite feature about skillshare which is that learn by doing approach to teaching this is where members can create and share a project after completing their class and then get feedback from their Community which I just think helps you reap even more benefits from the work that you're putting in you can track yourself today to make sure that you you are actually staying accountable to becoming your best self in 2025 by clicking the link below in my description chapter number one understanding consistency and the difficulty of it girl I heard you don't even know what consistency is no but for real so many people confuse the term consistency with discipline there are two completely different things let me break it down for you because it's only once you understand it that you can finally overcome the problem the definition of consistency somebody who is consist istant is somebody who behaves in the same way has the same attitude towards people or things or achieve the same level of success in something for an extended period of time discipline on the other hand is when you consistently push yourself to do things regardless of your feeling to do them right so it's about I don't feel like working out but you're going to get up and you're going to do the same thing anyway consistency on the other hand is about going to the gym at the same time in your morning routine for months and months and months so why is consistency so damn hard well they actually all links into our dopamine which I found so interesting once I understood this oh my God this read me to filth since the new year just started I'll use that as an example right it's the first day or the first week of 2025 and you want to be that girl with the healthy morning routine who wakes up at 6:00 a. m. every single day I'm sure you know people or you have done many times throughout many New Years woken up at 6:00 a.
m. meditated had your healthy breakfast you felt so good about it 3 months later was it gone end of the year you can barely remember when you were living through that routine but you found it so easy in the beginning why because it feels good to set those routines we get a dopamine Spike when we just think about making healthy choices for ourselves or doing right by ourselves that's the thing that gives us this Rush of motivation and discipline which gets us to do the task initially but the consistency tends to wear off and that's because once you've done that healthy habit a few times and the Habit is set there's no more dopamine spikes around it because it's now your new normal and that's exactly why it's time to debunk some myths around consistency consistency has nothing to do with discipline as we know from that piece of research consistency is actually just all about the relationship you have with yourself and what I mean by that is trus in your abilities self-belief and knowing that you are reliable and that you always show up to stick through on your promises because breaking those promises to yourself and not showing up for yourself is a pattern it becomes this code and this identity of who you are and how you do things in your life a person with self-belief and a person with strong self- Lov who knows exactly who they are and fully believes in their ability to do anything despite having no experience in it they are always going to show up for example a person who's been making YouTube videos and is on 700,000 subscribers they know they can feel that 1 million plaque coming right so they show up still every single week and they continue to do it whereas the YouTuber who's also been on YouTube for a very long time but is struggling to hit a thousand subscribers they're not showing up they're not consistent they don't feel like they can do it they doubt their ability to reach that goal which is why they can't get there and I know what you're thinking oh well it's easy for the person with 700,000 subscribers to show up consistently because they're close they've already had the success they're getting there hold up rewind the person with 700,000 subscribers was in the exact same place as the person who was struggling to hit a th000 in the first place they were there and I'll tell you exactly why me the story is based on me I was took on 1,000 subscribers for 3 years 3 years and now because I finally started Shing up because the 3 years I was inconsistent because the 3 years I was waiting for the results to just come and fall right into my lap for me to become an overnight success and that was making me doubt my abilities in myself cuz I was like why don't I have it yet it's been 3 years it was the second that even when I had 1,000 subscribers I started acting like that plaque had my name written all over it that's what gave me the push to start up every single week because that Vision that visualization made me start believing in myself and then that ended up coming within one year of making that decision and that leads us right into chapter number two practical fixes to becoming a more consistent person in every single thing you do okay so let's say you have this one thing that you really want to be consistent in and you just can't do it no matter how hard you try well hack number one is that that thing you want to be consistent in has to be tied to a personal value and if you're doubting whether I'm right let me just prove you wrong real quick let's take self-care or doing your makeup or even doing your skincare in the morning and at night as an example you are so consistent with that you do it all the time and most of you even enjoy it and love it and want to keep buying more skincare products because social media glamorizes it and because of that it has in turn become a part of your personal values that tie into your values of I want to be beautiful I want to have clear skin I want to feel good about myself I want to be in my feminine energy I want to take care of myself you value having or doing or being all of those things and doing your skin care is the action of that so you find it so easy and you do it every single day but your work on the other hand which you can't be consistent in you have no values around it your mindset instantly when you have to sit down and do some work is oh I have to work oh I have to work all day for 8 hours oh it's so boring I wish I could do literally anything else who is ever going to be consistent when you think like that about something okay so then how do we fix this we turn do that work task let's say for example you have a business and you're really struggling to show up every single day to put in the work it's not about I have to sit down and work on this business I have to sit down and make 20 Instagram posts for the business in a month because that just sounds so boring and so icky and so long and difficult that task is now tied to the personal value of I'm just inevitably taking something off my vision board which is going to get me closer to my goal or sitting down for 3 hours to make 20 Instagram posts a batch for the month means that I get to attract even more customers which brings me more money which then adds to my personal value of having Financial abundance so that I can live my life in the way that I choose how much more fund does that seem now another great example of being consistent once you tie it to your values is for years I hated healthy eating like couldn't do it hate to it I love comfort food I love drug food i b my diet was 90% of pures food I am quite embarrassed to admit and I just couldn't get around the like eating Whole Foods right now I do it so easily and I'm completely turning off of junk food like I literally mostly eat just veggies and protein and the reason it was so easy to become so consistent in that almost overnight was simply because I had learned so much about the dangers of eating unhealthy food and not having a healthy diet I learned that it can increase your cortisol it can cause a hormonal imbalance it can cause inflammation in your body in your face it can even affect your appearance those are tied into my personal values now it's not about oh I have to sit down and eat a plate of broccoli it's I can't wait to eat the plate of broccoli because it's going to benefit me and my lifestyle in literally so many ways hack number two to becoming a consistent person is you need to prepare yourself for failure yes I said that right because consistency is not about perfection the reason people always fall short from consistency is because they think they need to perform in the exact same way every single time but girl you are not a robot you cannot show up every single day in the exact same way with the exact same thought and the same energy in the same Vibe and the same ideas all the time you're going to have really good days where you're feeling on top of the world and you want to work out for longer and you're going to have other days where you literally don't want to move and you just want to stay inside away from the big scary world both are completely okay both do not have to make you an inconsistent human being because it's all about persistence we said consistency by definition is about doing something for an extended period of time right it's about showing up for yourself every single day now we need to cater that to the fact that we are humans with emotions with difficult things that go on in everybody else's lives and we need to be able to hold space for ourselves to be able to deal with those things and still do everything we want to do and that is where the power of varying routines comes into play so let's take a morning routine for example right a general morning routine I want to wake up I want to have my breakfast I want to meditate I want to move my body in some way do some exercise on the days where I'm feeling my best I'm not going through a lot of stuff I'm going to be aiming for that best routine where I'm taking off everything I want to take off I'm going to push myself hard on other days where I'm feeling low energy life is dressing out I've got a lot on my plate we're going to take off all of the same things but in a different capacity to also take care of ourselves so we're going to wake up earli but give ourselves an extra 30 minutes in bed we're still going to move our body but instead of going to the gym for an hour we'll do 30 minutes and then you have your third routine which is for your off days right let's say you're on your period you're feeling kind of sick you are sad about something you just want to have a complete day off that's fine we can still tick everything off instead of going to the gym at all you go for a 10-minute walk go get your your favorite latte you're treating yourself you're getting fresh air sunlight and movement but in a way that suits you your needs and your capacity that day if you read my book bios off the damn flowers which is The Ultimate Guide to self love I actually have a complete guide of the three varying routines in the book and that links me into my next point which is all about check off the task not the method you want to be someone who meditates every single day fine on the days that you're busy your schedule is hectic don't worry about meditating for 10 minutes and pulling out the guided meditation music and opening the app and fing a yoga mat or a patch of grass to sit on do it for 1 minute in your office chair that's so easy who doesn't have the time to do that and then becoming consistent in all of the things you want to do becomes a whole lot easier hack number three the reason that humans can't be consistent is because especially in this day and age we are programmed and wired and we have grown accustomed to immediate rewards and immediate dopamine spikes especially because of apps like Tik Tok and just social media in general and having phones where everything we would ever want is available at our fingertips within seconds within minutes whether it's food whether it's video a piece of information so then when we have to sit down and show up for something every single day or we're training to run a marathon or learn new language that takes time there's no quick fix around it you can't chat GPT that and then that's what makes the task icky of course you don't want to do it of course you don't want to be consistent so the way around this is to start adding rewards in throughout your day to give your brain that dopamine Spike that it is so bad craving so one way I do this every single day is when I have a large chunk of work to do EG writing one of my self-help newsletters which takes literally 5 or 6 hours what I say to myself is you just have to sit down do the first chunk and then you're allowed to open all your Parcels I want to open my new clothes I want to see what I got in the mail but I'm not allowed to do it until I sit down to do the thing immediately that makes me want to get through it so I can go and do the thing that I actually want to do same for the days that I don't want to go to the gym to work out I'm like if you just go to the platies class go to the gym you can go on a nice sunny walk after and treat yourself to a matcher and I'm like instantly yes I want to go you have to give yourself that incentive consistently to be able to consistently do a task at least in the beginning stages and then that habit will start to form and then you can start getting away from those rewards hack number four is to actually plan for consistency too many people make the mistake of thinking in 2025 I really want to be consistent with working out and being my healthier self okay how what time time where when what's the routine how's it going to fit into your schedule if you had a really busy day then how you going to go about it and I find that when we're planning for consistency let's say every single morning you're going to wake up at 7:00 a. m.
and you really want to meditate in your money routine okay let's set a time in place of that to really solidify in your brain and make associations that helps making that habit feel more consistent for example in the morning the second you wake up you don't even have to call out a bed yet okay alarm goes off you turn it off you stay in bed sit up and do 2 minutes of meditation or 2 minutes of visualization or 2 minutes of EFT tapping then you get out of bed and go about your day that way there's no thinking or worrying about how am I going to be consistent and how am I going to do this thing because it's falling into your daily routine and you know exactly where and when you're going to do it know ifs and buts and this links into my next hack which is my favorite if you want to be consistent with something you need to add it onto a task or habit that you already do that you are super consistent with a great example of this is brushing your teeth you don't think about it you wake up you do it first thing in the morning okay nobody needs to remind you it's the easiest thing in the world to be consistent with you can then pair that onto something that you are struggling to be consistent with I would always forget to look at my vision board every single day if you don't look at your vision board there was literally no point in making it it's not going to work the visualization isn't there the manifestation is not happening girl okay we need to look at it but I'd always forget and you also need to look at it for an extended period of time you can't just look at it while walking across room and just seeing it in the side of your eye you need to look at it for like minutes you need to take it in you need to look at those images and place yourself in those images you need to start building up an emotional connection to how those images on your board make you feel to actually be able to manifest them to this day I even did it this morning while I'm brushing my teeth my bathroom door is right over there I come out I stand by the vision board while I'm brushing my teeth for 2 minutes I'm staring every single image it's the easiest thing in the world takes no extra time in my my day I don't need to remember it and the Habit is formed because the second I start brushing my teeth I'm like oh my God yeah I know what to look at another example is I always listen to high frequency healing music when I take my morning shower cuz I'm not going to listen to that music on my daily commute I'm not going to do it when I'm trying to walk and strut through streets like a fashion model okay I'm not going to feel like it but I know I want to listen and heighten my vibration doing it morning shower associate them together you're always going to remember the next hack is to remember the consequence this is is so powerful the way this makes me so consistent in my habits and what I mean by remember the consequence is you need to know what happens if you don't do what you're setting out to do if you want to be your Healthy self if you want to be able to go to the gym every single day but you just aren't a gym girly I want you to start researching watching videos search on chat gbt what happens if someone doesn't work out consistently what effect does that have on them let it give you the ick because that is what will motivate you for example to this day I still hate going to the gym I will never be a gym early is just not in me now I go so consistently because I did enough research to understand if I don't go to the gym at least 3 times a week I'm going to feel slugish it's going to impact my energy it's going to impact my health I'm going to have high cortisol I also know people who go to the gym it helps them hack their happy hormones why would I not want to be the happiest version of myself and be the most highest fully functioning human being where all of their hormones are in the best place simply because they just went to do the 30 45 minute workout as we're now coming to the end of the video I really want to solidify these ideas in you because I'm not about to let you invest the time in watching this video just to turn it off forget everything I said and not actually AC in any of it okay so I need to bring back two girls who have been long forgotten for a while let's bring them out Lola and Athena so now let's look at the difference between someone who has mastered consistency simply because of these mindset shifts that I've spoken about in the video versus somebody who just isn't working on it they just they're just like I'm just not cons isn't so that's it I really want to be a content creator fulltime but it's just so hard to post all the time like I don't know what to do and I'm so busy with everything else that I just forget it has always been my lifelong dream to be a content creator and while I still got school and a part-time job I figured out that Instagram and all of my other favorite social platforms have scheduling features and I know that every Sunday morning I have a little bit of spare time so I'm going to plan ahead and make sure all of my content is badged and I'll simply PIR the action on sitting down to schedule all of that social media content with my Sunday morning reset routine which I love and do every single week so then it's just so easy I've always wanted to write a book but it's just so hard and I keep having writers blocked like I just don't feel inspired every single day and I don't know if what I want to write about is even good enough so how can I do this I am so determined to make sure that I write my dream book in 2025 every single day I wake up with a different mindset and different energy and I never ever feel inspired but I found out that I can just use the 3 minute rule to make sure that I'm showing up for myself every single day that way I can literally just write a sentence but according to this productivity principle even if I write for 3 minutes already that will get my juices flowing get me out of any writing blocks and actually influence me to end up writing more than I had initially planned just when win and then that way I don't have the pressure to have to write for 8 hours every single day because that's just too icky consistency is just so hard I feel like people either have it or they don't like I'm just not focused like that I can't stay on a task for that long I just get so easily distracted and I just I don't know what to do I could watch all the YouTube videos but just nothing changes so oh no it can be so easy like just taking my supplements every single day and not forgetting about them by having a reminder in my phone and making sure I look at it every single day or going to bed at the same time every single day or making sure I read three pages of a book every single day it does not need to be big or fancy just doing one promise changes everything you see the difference and that brings us to the final chapter of the video the homework chapter if you're new here at the end of every single one of my YouTube videos and every single one of my podcast episodes we also have a homework chapter to make everything you learned super practical and actionable so that you can start the second you click of this video task number one I want you to fixate on the one thing you want to be consistent at your brain is too modeled sis You' got too many things going on and I get it okay beginning of a year you have so many things you want to achieve this year focus on one okay even I with all of my New Year's resolutions I spit them up into months because you're just going to overwhelm yourself I want you to pick one thing you want to become a master person actart super consistent with it every single day and you're going to Channel all of your time and effort into that cuz I promise you it takes becoming consistent at one thing to start changing your identity start changing your relationship with yourself and then everything else will become easy so figure out what that is homework task number two is to use journaling in your favor when you figured out what you want to be consistent with I think journaling is a great method especially for me when I know I have to write about my day in the morning or in the evening I remember that as I'm living out my day I'm like I'm going to have to write about this or like I wrote in my journal this morning that this is what I wanted to achieve today I'm going have to hold myself accountable a little bit and I think ging is such a great way to do that you can even use a blank notebook that's what I did for so long but if you do want to get a guided Journal I have the perfect one every single day you get a double page spread where you recap your day you say what you're grateful for you write down what you want in your life and then you have a checklist which keeps you accountable every single day for you to recap the next day this links into homework cast number three which is all about manifestation and visualization your life is going to change once you start shifting outside of your limiting beliefs and what you think that you're bad at I have always been a night ult who couldn't wake up early on my vision board for this year is to start waking up at 5: a. m. guess who's been waking up at 5:00 a.
m. I could not do it all 2024 but when I put this goal on my vision board I was like how the hell am I going to achieve this and I thought you know what I need to get out of my limiting mindset and I need to tell myself I can do this easily but on top of with that because I'm looking at that vision board every single day which has a 500 a. m.
alarm on it I have to start thinking like that and placing myself in that reality I truly believe that is exactly what helped me get up at 5:00 a. m.
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