Let them lose you

let them lose you it's going to be one of the ones as you can tell by the tonality of my voice and the fact that I'm walking around if you know me and I'm walking around it's only one of three things it's anxiety is something I'm passionate about or the thoughts is overwhelming I avoided this video topic due to it being a bit sensitive in the things that I'm going through in life right now but it is absolutely necessary and I feel like it's time for me to make this video but yes let them lose

you you can't hold on to people relationships or even sometimes jobs or anything that makes you feel as if you have to you have to prove yourself to them or you have to prove your value to them and prove that you're the right choice because all it is doing is hurting you and limiting and limiting You by holding up the capacity inside of your brain that where other space or energy can be going towards that you can grow or better said for your growth stop holding on to these things it's all they are doing is

hurting you I'm actually going to try to force myself to sit down I feel a little bit calm after getting the intro out the way that's the the nerves and got out of the way a little bit let's go ahead and sit down I'm going to force myself to sit down but if need be I need to get up I will be getting up and walking around that's a bit better let them lose you let them lose you stop holding on to these things of people that make you feel as if you have to prove

something in them or show them that you're the right choice no matter what it is whether that's in relationships friendships being on a job any of these things you may have to just detach and let them miss out on the greatness of you this is something that I personally struggle with and you may struggle with as well is is is letting people miss out on you sometimes that's precisely the thing that you have to do I'm learning how to come to peace with that I never felt like I was anybody's first choice and sinces are

you may have felt that way too at some point but in regards to my life in any aspect whether it's even something as simple as playing basketball or going on a trip or hanging out with people I've always never felt that I was the best I was the best choice even though I understood the the qualities in which that I would bring to whatever it is whatever activity whatever relationship or anything that it is I understood that and it evolved into an issue for myself and it evolves into issues for a lot of people is

where we feel is if we have to prove oursel and prove our value towards people part of it is kind of the ego or the mindset of it and it's a good and bad thing but what I'm noticing more so is I've been taking more negative than I have positive when it comes into that when it comes to you holding on to relationships or being in relationships where it comes to where you feel as if you have to prove your value you get into this mindset at a certain point where it's like I'll show you

let me adjust the camera real quick but yes you get into that I show you mindset and it is something that can be very toxic to yourself because these same people that you're holding on to trying to prove your value to try to show them that you're the best choice you're going to continue to do so and guess what's going to happen to you when they don't give you that validation that you've been craving or seeking you going to be very disappointed you going to be hurt you going to be you going to start to

question your own value you're going to start to question yourself as to to what you truly bring is of quality or or if you are the right choice yeah no we can't continue to put ourselves in that mindset we can't put our frame into that mindset and in doing that we have to understand our own value and the crazy thing about it the crazy thing about it is that a lot of us truly do kind of already understand our value or we're at least working on improving our value but when it comes to these relationship

Dynamics with people and things of that we always try to show show our value or make someone feel or or we always try to show someone our value or more so seek from the validation of them or more so seek the validation of them saying like hey you're you're great I feel like I've never been anybody's First Choice when it comes to a lot of things I feel as if a lot of people didn't see my value so I built up that mindset of thinking that I will show you I am better I am the

correct choice and I'm going to make you see that I'm the right choice but guess what they didn't choose me these people didn't choose me and chances are that they're not going to choose you so the only thing that you can do for yourself is let them miss out on your greatness yeah that's it right there the only thing you can do for yourself in these situations of holding on to these people and they're making your question your value making you question your worth or making you question if you're if you're the right choice the

best thing that you can do the best thing you can do is let them lose you let them miss out on you and it's like yeah it's hard because sometimes you want someone to see the value in you or you you want that outside validation sometimes I know I would like it sometimes it feels great sometime when somebody really realizes the things that you're bringing to the quality of you how how you're always improving yourself or how you show up for for whatever job it is and you get the job done like you're the go-to

guy yeah it feels good sometimes when you have that the person that truly needs to understand their value and sees their value and know that they're worth something is you you're the only person that needs to know that you're worth something you're the you're the only person that needs to don't know that you're the right choice even if you're the right choice for yourself you're the number one choice for yourself these relationships when they get you when they get you into this to this to this mindset where you're you're you're questioning your value or they're

not seeing your value becomes very taxing it can put you in a very dark place to make you feel like you're not enough or feel like you're not doing enough you're not improving you're not the go-to person it can make you feel very bad about yourself but because you're stuck in that mind frame of it's like okay yeah I'm going to prove them I'm going to show them I am the better choice you get stuck in this cycle but you have to pull yourself out of that cycle the thing that I've learned is just learn

to let people miss out on you let them miss out on you let them lose you let them miss your greatness and it's hard when you want that validation from that one person or one thing to just let you know that you're you're the go-to person you're the right choice you're value you're appreciated it it hurts it hurts a lot when you don't get that I can say for my situation I'll let you in on my situation as of recently there was a certain somebody that I tried my best to show my value to they

never made me feel as if I was satisfactory and what did that do that made me go even harder to continue to try to put to continue to try and show my value to make them appreciate me or make me feel appreciated make me feel as if I'm doing something great there times where I've saying there there's been times where I've expressed where that I was doing something great or I was going to do this and that and it was no compliment there was no hey you doing good or it was never any true support

behind that to give me kind of that validation or feelings as if I was doing something good and and it was negatively impacting me but obviously we still have to show up and we still have to perform but yes this this specific person I kept trying to express my value and always do things and and and bring up these things to to really truly change their perspective to see the quality that I'm bringing them but you can't make a person who doesn't see your value see your value it's something like trying to wear somebody else's

prescription you can't see chances are you wear another person glasses you just can't see you can't change their perspective on you they have to realize it and if they don't realize it or you don't see that they're coming to a point where they are going to realize it or they're appreciating you more you just have to do what is best for yourself in that situation and let them miss out sadly you don't want some people to miss out but yes I continue I continue to try to show my value to people and this is a

thing that even even not not even when it comes to just this one person that's a thing I always try to express my value to people some sometimes I don't really kind of flaunt it but a lot of the times I find myself searching for that validation of somebody saying like hey you're appreciated hey you're valuable hey you're doing great and I'm learning not to do that because like I said recently when it came to this one specific person or this one situation I constantly try to show them my I constantly try to tell them

I'm great I constantly try to do things and guess what they didn't choose me and that hurts when you're when you're doing great things for yourself and trying to do great things for others and providing something of substance into other people's life and they don't they they they can't just sit here and say that you're appreciated or they can't they they don't make you feel as if you're valuable they have you questioning your value and make you get into the cycle of constantly trying to Pro prove your value to them it sucks it hurts real

bad it can put you in a dark space but I'm learning that's something that we can't do we can't do we can't do that anymore we can't sit here and try to prove our value once again the person that knows our value is us we are the only person that need to know our value it should get to a point where our value and the things that we bring in life and the great things that we are doing for ourself we give ourselves that validation and yes it's a human thing for us to want that

on the outside but yet we have to embrace more so on the inside to so that we can get that that sense of fulfillment if we can't Outsource it we have to we have to get it inside we have to find a way to create that you lose a lot of energy trying to become this person that is the right choice for other people or the go-to guy or always trying to prove yourself to other people to show your value to other people you lose a lot of energy but you need to you need to

be the you need to go be the go-to God for yourself you need to be you need to appreciate the things that you are doing for yourself you need to know your own value you know that the qualities that you bring are something special you are something special the that you are bringing are of are of substance the thing that you are bringing are significant the qualities in what you have or may just be something that this person doesn't necessarily see as valuable and it's kind of crazy because chances are is probably something some quality

about yourself that is kind of generally accepted amongst many that is is something of value whether that's your ability to communicate well your emotional um intelligence or you just showing up when is needed showing up when is needed you have to realize that some people don't find Value in these things and you can't make them and in that you can't continue you to allow yourself to to feel bad about these things but yeah if they don't find the things that you're bringing to them as quality or valuable or significant and they feel as if there

is there's something better or is if there is a better choice let them have that better choice let them see if the grass is greener a lot of people make the mistake in this world that the grass is greener on the other side but the grass is not really green it look it might look all luscious and whatnot from the distance and then you go you get over there that grass be dying witing all types of stuff let these things go I can't put emphasis on it enough pour into your own cup move all let

the other cups go let the other cups go pour into yourself let these people go let these relationships go stop draining yourself and it is hard I think I've said this maybe three or four times throughout the course of making this like yes it is hard letting people go letting people miss out on you letting people miss out on the value and and comeing to the mindset of where it's just like okay you don't see my value all right I know I'm valuable somebody find me valuable I'm going to take my value somewhere else where

it's appreciated and that goes that goes into go where you're celebrated not tolerate we going to cook for that one too we going to cook for that one too but yes if these relationships are not making you feel appreciated and making you question your value or have you questioning yourself man you have to the best thing that you can do is let them go to the thing or let the let them make the choice of choosing the thing that they find more valuable at that moment chances are they going to make the wrong choice chances

are they're not putting in the work that you putting in chances are they not going to show up the way that you showing up they not going to do the things that you're willing to do they not going to go that extra mile they're not improving themselves every single day chances are those are the chances so you got to let them go and that and it it it's going to take some time like I said this is something that I'm learning how to do it's been it's been very it it's been very hard as a

person who's who's once again always kind of not necessarily always but who wants to know that they're kind of viable who wants to know that they're doing a great thing in life who wants to know that they're appreciated it's a hard thing for a person who kind of yearns for that feeling and yearns for that feeling from specific people and they don't give it to you knowing and all while knowing your own value and that's another thing that's that's that's the that's the next that's the next point is the fact that a lot of us

know that we're doing great things a lot of us know our value a lot of us know that the things that we're doing would be be appreciated if we took it somewhere else but we constantly try to put it in the place where it's not appreciated or the fact that we'll know our value and we try not to live it out and we try not to flaunt it as a of just kind of being I guess not not necessarily generous the word isn't coming for me right now but you understand what I'm saying we're trying

not to throw it in people yeah that's what I'll say we're trying not to throw it in people faces we know our value but we're trying not to throw it inside of people's faces and flaunt it around you can't do that anymore you got to come to the realization of your value and start living it out and this is kind of something that I had to come to peace with towards the end of my little scenario and whatnot where I started actually talking about the things that I brought I started to talk about my great

things that I've done I started to to to talk about the qualities in which I've brought and I even emphasize the fact that I am better than the other options that is out there but yes there there's there's a there's a positive and negative of doing it the positive is you're understanding your value and you know the quality and you're taking pride in the fact that you are this great person doing these great things or providing these things of substance to whatever is on the receiving end but at the same time that thing is on

the receiving end of those words of you presenting forward your value or or showing them that you are of value they are not going to see it they don't see it they don't appreciate so what did you just do you just set yourself up for a little bit of a disappointment and the best thing that you can do for these people is to just sit back and just be like all right you don't see my value I'm going take it somewhere else you don't appreciate me somebody will appreciate me some job will appreciate me I'm

going to be the go-to person for somebody I'm going to be the go-to person for some job some activity even if you have to be appreciated by yourself even if the person that has to see your value has to be yourself even if it comes down to the person that that you are the number one choice is yourself and then it has to come down to that but you have to let you have to let go let people miss out on the blessing that you are let people miss out on the greatness that you are

let people miss out on all of the things the qualities and values that you bring into them and they don't appreciate it and the crazy thing about that is a lot of people don't realize what the value of something or the greatness of something until it is no longer in their grasp until they no longer have access to it until they no longer are receiving the energy that's been poured into them from that person or thing no matter what it is and it's a sad it's a sad scenario especially when it especially when it comes

to people man cuz you build these you build these emotions and you build these relationships and all of these things with these people and you just want them to you just want them to tell you that you're great you just want them to give you a pat on the back sometime you want them to say they're proud of you you want them to see your value and just just overall appreciate you and give you that fulfillment and they just don't do it and it's crazy because a lot of the times a lot of the times

when it comes to these more specific relationships is the value that you are presenting towards these people are jobs or anything of the sort they're not doing the same things towards you yet another reason why we have to learn how to let these things go it's hard and it can be somewhat painful detaching from whatever it is I understand I understand but you need to understand that this is something that you need to start doing this is something that we need to start practicing in order to to to let go of our limiters in order

to open up some more of our some more of the space inside of our capacity in order to expand in order to put more energy back into ourselves this is something that we must start practicing and and applying to our our everyday lives is is knowing our value and going where we're appreciated taking our value somewhere where we're seen as valuable think about that you have to take your value to take your greatness and put it somewhere else where it's going to be appreciated you can't sit here and tax yourself anymore there's no need for

that and I'm learning that and we need to learn that and we need to apply this to our lives we can't do this we can't please everybody you're not going to be seen as great to everybody you're not going to be seen as the hero to everybody you're everybody's not going to be able to see your value they're looking at you from a different Lev lens and you take the lens if you take the lens that they're looking at you from and put it on your face you're not going to be able to see clearly

that's exactly how they're seeing you they don't see your value so yeah it's a sad scenario but some people just going to have to miss out on you some people going have to miss out on your greatness some people going to have to miss out on on all of the significant and great things that are to come from you but in the end you are the person that needs to feel as if you're doing great you're doing great for yourself you need to feel as if you have value you need to feel as if you're

the number one person or the go-to person like I said even if it is for yourself you need to feel like that remove your value and remove your greatness from people that don't appreciate it and move it somewhere where it is appreciated even if that's within yourself go where your go where you celebrate not tolerate go where somebody sees the greatness and you let these things go so with that I want to wrap this up and I want to talk to you and I want to talk to myself with this I want to give you

some affirmations you are valuable you are great you're doing the right thing you are appreciated the things that you're doing are leaving an impact you are someone's number one choice you are great you're doing great you're strong you are valuable you are appreciated I'm saying this to you on the other side of the screen I'm saying this to you on the other side of the screen and I am talking to myself right now you are appreciated you are valuable stop worrying if everybody else sees the value within you you need to see the value within

you sometimes you don't even know your own value like I said sometime we lower our own value or understanding of our value or play play it down a little bit just to accommodate for other people but but realize the things that we're doing are great but let's appreciate ourselves let's appreciate our own value let's appreciate the great things that we are doing and stop worrying if anybody else see it we are great we are doing great things we are worth it we are valuable we are someone's number one choice even if that choice that person

that is choosing is our s if they don't see your value let them lose you let them miss out on their blessing let them miss out on your greatness let them miss out on the greatness that you are going to do stop trying to hold on to these people all you're doing is limiting yourself I'd rather be surrounded by people that see my value and see me as something great and appreciate me then always being around people that I have to prove my value to and and search for that appreciation from even if that person

that I'm getting it from is myself I'd rather be by myself and we talked about that before and that's the mindset you have to come to so yeah let these people miss out on you let them choose other people the the grass is not always greener I promise you my friend the grass is not always greener there is only one you and there is only one person that is bringing the qualities of you and can do the things that you do the way that you do it let these people lose you and why you going

through this process of realizing your value and walking from these people always remember to take it just like this one breath one step one day at a time and it's going to be all right somebody's going to appreciate your value somebody's going to appreciate the things that you bring in this life even if it's just you somebody will you are enough you've been enough this whole time so stop beating yourself up and appreciate yourself see the value in yourself I'm proud of you you doing doing great things let's keep doing it let's do it for

ourselves let's not get discouraged let's not worry about what anybody else thinks about our value let's just focus on oursel that's part of it that's what we got to go through go where you're celebrated not where you're tolerated you are valuable all right you have a blessed one