Dr. Wayne Dyer's Life Advice Moving Forward & Letting GO - Don't Miss This one!

the next principle I call giving up your personal history and I learned it from a man named Carlos costan who once said that um one day he said I finally realized that I no longer needed a personal history and just like drinking he said I gave it up and that and only that has made all the difference in the world you know the nice thing about giving up your personal history is that if you don't have a story you don't have to live up to it all of us have these bags of manure that we

carry around with us called our past and the people who have done things to us and the events and the circumstances all of this stuff that we use and we bond to and we bond oursel to these wounds of our past and we identify oursel on the basis of these wounds and every once in a while we set it down and we reach in there and we smear all over ourselves and then we wonder why does my life smell so bad I don't understand this when in fact the now this moment merging yourself into the

now means that you may have been in a relationship I had a woman from Holland who came over to see me whose husband had left her after 25 years she had four children and she just had been on the verge of suicide and she was losing weight and she was depressed and she was taking all kinds of drugs for it and she was was getting sicker and sicker because she just couldn't get over it and she came to a book signing that I was doing at a bookstore down in Florida and she said you've got

to say something to me you've got to say something to me that will help me to get over this and I told her this line I said give up your personal history merge yourself here now into this moment and those 25 years are something if you want to understand how to do it think of your past as oh this hat and this is your past now you can't just set this thing down over here and walk away from it and give up your personal history because you'll always have it there to look back at what

you do is you pick up your past and you embrace it you understand it you accept it as I had to go through these things that I had to go through in order for me to get to this place today and the evidence for that is that I did you don't need any more evidence you did and then you toss it you toss it you embrace it and you toss it and you merge into the Now by giving up your attachment and some of you have heard me use the metaphor of the Wake Alan Watts

talked about the wake is not what drives the boat the wake is just a trail that is Left Behind that's all it is and so is the wake of your life and the Wake doesn't make the boat go and neither does the wake of your life the reason why your life is going in the direction that it is the wake is a trail that is left behind and it's an illusion to believe that it is the cause of your suffering or your struggles or your difficulty give it up Let It Go embrace it understand it

get help doing that if you must and then move into the now the next principle I call it's from a line of uh Albert Einstein he said you can't solve a problem with the same mind that created it in order to work at solving these things called problems in your life you have to change your mind it is your mind where they live it is your mind that created them them they there is where you experience them they're all Illusions you must change your mind literally rewrite your agreement with reality one of the things I

had said earlier is that one of the most difficult things to do in the world is to admit that you were wrong admitting that you were wrong is nothing more than saying I have been making choices with my mind that have created things in my life that are not working and I no longer intend to continue making those choices I was wrong you don't have to make a declaration of it you don't have to go out and feel guilty about it you just simply say it didn't work the relationship that I was in before I

behaved in these ways I didn't realize that it wasn't working for me now I do and this is where I choose to be now the secret of a successful Rel relationship is to me understanding that you put your attention and your energy in a person on what you love rather than what you don't love Robert Frost said it so beautifully we love the things we love for what they are for what they are not for what they ought to be not for what they used to be but for what they are so when you look

into the eyes of a person you're in a relationship with whether it's your children you catch them doing things right as much as you possibly can that's often time takes a lot of hunting but you'll find it and when you think that my relationship isn't working remember it's in my mind what am I thinking about that person and if I could just change my mind and put my thoughts on what I love about this person and keep them there that makes the relationship flourish and there are people who go through their entire relationship history with

no anger no hatred no bitterness and only love the next principle is I call it treating yourself as if you already were what you would like to become in other words you get out in front of your life and you see yourself as having already what you know you'd like to have and deserve to have my children know how to do this perfectly I have a daughter who wanted a prom dress and the prom dress was way outside the budget that I thought a prom Des should be uh well I thought a prom Des shouldn't

cost over $20 so I do have a problem but I upped it to somewhere around 250 I don't know how much whatever to me it was still more than I paid for my first house okay uh but anyway she called and said Dad this is the only prom desk I could this is I've got to wear this prom desk if I don't wear this prom Des it's just on and on and on with this uh wonderful you know I've got a I saw a wonderful book about how to raise teenage uh daughters the title of

it is get out of my life but first drive me and Cheryl to the mall all right that's a that's the actual title it's a good book and so I told Serena I said it's just beyond the budget I've got a certain amount of money that I'm willing to put for it and she said but I've already seen myself wearing it I've already tried it on I have a picture of myself in the dress in my living room and I've already showed it to the guy who's taking me to the prom I mean it was

this whole thing about and she already saw herself in it I said well if you see yourself in it then you're going to have to also see yourself as earning the difference between what I'm willing to pay and she Drew up a contract she went on to the computer and on the background of the computer you know where they have these little background things they put on there was 500 pictures of the dress all right and she signed a contract and said I'll babysit I'll do this I'll do that and I will pay the difference

and she did and she wore the dress because she understood that you treat yourself as if you already are are what you'd like to become there's a genius in you you have to treat yourself as if you already were that genius there's something you're completely capable of see yourself as already there then you'll act upon those thoughts because the ancestor to every action said Emerson is a thought the next principle is called treasuring your Divinity treasuring your Divinity there's a wonderful observation that I saw from uh from Emerson in self-reliance it's about trusting your Divinity

knowing that you are connected to your Source knowing that you are a Divine cre creation and that there are no accidents he said a man should learn to detect and watch that gleam of Light which flashes across his mind from within more than the luster of the firmament of bards and sages yet he dismisses without notice his own thought because it's his own in every work of Genius we recognize our own rejected thoughts they come back to us with a certain alienated Majesty we often reject our thoughts and we see the things that we think

of as Grand and as genius and we reject them because they're our own treasuring our Divinity instead of being terrified of it knowing that I am always connected to my source there is no way that I cannot because it is in you and I am in you and you are in me and you can never be separated from it there is no place that this source is not it grows everybody's fingernails it beats everybody's Hearts it digests everybody's Foods it opens all the flowers and you're always connected to it and finally the last principle I

call wisdom is avoiding all thoughts which weaken you you know every thought has an energy just like everything else in the universe and if you have a thought of shame it will weaken your muscles and what is your heart but a muscle if you raise a child who believe in shame and feel ashamed of themselves every time they think that shameful thought they will be weakened and if you have a thought of fear and if you have a thought of stress and you have a thought of Anguish and anxiety all of these thoughts and many

more are the thoughts that will always weaken you when you are having a thought that you know is dis empowering you shift it shift it to one that is empowering rather than disempowering and the thoughts that Empower are thoughts of neutrality and willingness and love and ultimately thoughts of divinity and when you see a troubled person who is out there struggling at the highest level of unity Consciousness or God Consciousness or spiritual Consciousness you recognize yourself in all that you see there but for the grace of God go I and I am connected to that

person changing your thoughts I appeared on the tonight's show many years ago several times quite a few times and I remember coming home from The Tonight Show and I was walking along the beach and they had taped the show the night before and I was out for a walk and a woman who lived in uh the Northeast stopped me and she said didn't I see you last night and how could you be here I said well I flew the Redeye and I was walking along and she said you know we're moving down here she said

um what are the people like here what's it like and I said to her I said well what do they like where you live she said well she said I I live in a very big city and she said uh they're very pushy and and people are not very kind and they don't have time for you and she said uh it's really not very pleasant she said that's one of the reasons I'm leaving there I said well that's pretty much what you're going to find here that's basically what the people are like here on the

way back on the same day someone else who had seen me the night before on The Tonight Show who had lived in the midwest stopped me and asked me almost the same question she said you live here I said yes she said what my my husband and I are moving here and we're looking for a school she said what are the people like here what's it like here I said what are they like in in uh Chicago where you live she said oh she said it's the Midwest she said people are very friendly they're open

they open their homes to you they're very loving they're very kind she said it's a wonderful place she said I love that I'm going to really miss that I said that's pretty much what you're going to find here it's what you expect it's what you think about that expands it's what Emerson taught us the ancestor to every action is a thought change your thoughts and you change your world change your expectations and you change around what you begin to manifest and see showing up in your life