How to Build Self-Discipline: The Mindset Method

let's talk about discipline here's my transformation story in less than five seconds i used to be lazy self-absorbed did a lot of drugs i sucked now i don't plot twist but in that journey which was for the record longer than five seconds i had a really cool emotional growth and that was from a place where i didn't respect myself to a place where i did what changed what was the secret ingredient wanna know you guessed it discipline baby it was doing the things that i said i was gonna do despite resistance which is incidentally my

definition for discipline this video is how i cultivated it from a mindset point of view and heads up this whole thing works way better if you're physiologically fulfilled drink enough water eat the right food exercise all of the cliches and also it'll happily work in tandem with those classic discipline hacks you know things like a pomodoro clock or an accountability partner or a guy named steve who you pay to stand in the corner in your motivational quotes at you every hour on the hour and that right steve you can do it thanks bro and remember

that this mindset method is just what works for me so if something resonates use it and if something doesn't ditch it alrighty let's get disciplined step one reframe discipline as a function of self-love there's this pretty iconic will smith interview where he's talking about discipline and the way that he talks about it is it is a function of him loving himself because he loves himself he is going to treat himself like somebody he loves the example he uses is pizza you say to yourself hey man look i know you want to eat that pizza and

it'll be really good but i can't let you eat that man cause if you eat that pizza you're gonna feel like [ __ ] you know and i i just i love you too much to let you eat that self-discipline is self-love if you want to be happy you have to love yourself i really like starting here because i think that discipline can get pretty toxic if it comes from the wrong place so me for example when i was trying to quit drugs on willpower alone it just didn't work it would always be short-lived and

empty and full of guilt and shame and i was just trying to turn myself into this obedient robot but when i reframed it as well i love myself therefore i'm gonna treat my body as a temple it became a lot easier and a lot more sustainable now here's the cool thing it's a spiral self-love can give you discipline but discipline can also give you self-love and self-respect by acting like somebody who you would respect you naturally just by definition respect yourself so i noticed a few years ago that i really respected people who conquered their

fears and meanwhile i had this fear of certain marine life mostly squids octopi sort of sharks i guess kind of even fish to be honest and so i started getting into the ocean a lot more and looking at these creatures close up and after i did this i would always be like damn i face my fears oh well now i respect myself cool step two make discipline part of your identity so to start this step we need to take a mental shift and that is except that being a disciplined version of yourself is inevitable the

reason we're doing this is because people act in line with the person that they think they are very easy example michael jordan thought he was a winner so every time he'd lose he would double down to win again because that is what was consistent with his identity similarly that dude that you went to high school with who's now a massive steiner won't get off the couch because that is not in line with his identity so the thing that i've found works for me is painting a very clear picture of who i'd look like if i

was disciplined if i did the things that i said i was gonna do who would i be here's a few questions to answer for what discipline you is like what does their day look like where do they live what do they eat what do they wear what does their week look like what do they do for work who are they surrounded by what do they think and feel what do they say no to what do they say yes to and write any other details that you think will help you describe this person now it's time

for some mental gymnastics fully accept that at some point in the future you will be this person just be open to that possibility whether it's true or not is a different story and you might feel some resistance from your own head but you know push through that's what it's all about step three reflect this new identity in your environment your environment is a great way to outsource your discipline and it's also a great way to give you tangible reminders of the person that you're becoming so you know when you go to your hometown or go

to a place that you used to visit a lot and you kind of get a sort of wave of nostalgia and also a wave of cringe it's because there's so many tangible reminders of the person that you used to be your brain whether it's conscious or not tears picking up on all these physical cues and your emotions and your actions follow which can be negative but we can also use it to our advantage so for this exercise you want your environment to look as much like what your disciplined self's environment would look like a super

obvious example would be if you're disciplined you was an athlete your environment would be i leave my yoga mat out i have weights here i've got a gym bag at the door i wear activewear so when i'm looking at a menu i pick the healthiest thing things like that tangible things that keep you reminded of the future that you could have step four internalize the threat of not doing this all right we're going advanced class now we are gonna threaten ourselves into being disciplined and this might not work for everybody like i said at the

start this is just my method just take what works and leave what doesn't but i may as well go over everything loss aversion is proven to be a more powerful motivator than gain you would rather avoid losing a dollar than gaining a dollar the way that we can use this to our advantage to trick our own brains is to make us feel like we are losing something if we're not disciplined for example there's this website called stick wherein they ask you to create a commitment contract then you put your money on the line let's say

it's 200 or something like that and you say unless i do this one thing which i said i was going to do unless i'm disciplined that money is going to go to a cause that i hate it's going to go straight into the pockets of neo-nazis now not only do you have the loss aversion of losing your 200 but you have it even greater because who wants to give 200 bucks to neo-nazis not me not at all not for a goddamn second i'm actually using loss of version as a motivator at the moment so one

thing that i've never been able to properly nail is consistent youtube uploads but this year i've decided to try something different i've got an editor but there is one twist i have pre-paid them they get the money regardless of whether i film something or not the theory is that my drive to not lose money is stronger than my drive to skip a week of videos so let's see how that pans out fingers crossed it works but the key takeaway here is when you're looking at being disciplined try turn one of the habits that you want

to build into a system wherein loss aversion can motivate you and then replicate that loss aversion in your life in a healthy way in order to get you going well that was a mouthful step five have a good system to start things for me starting work is harder than sustaining it it's like that first push on the pedal of a bicycle it's always gonna be a bit harder than the one when you're actually cruising but you can have all the self-love and identity in the world but you won't be disciplined unless you actually start doing

something so i've got two techniques here that i split into starting systems and eliminating friction a starting system is just whatever gets you going so one thing for me as an author still feels new to say that i'll often not really feel in the mood to write and this is because it's hard who wants to do hard things my starting system to get over this is to write what i hate it's to rant and usually i'll just pick some extended family member that i don't like and just have a little rant about them for five

minutes and then oh now i'm typing now the good words that i actually wanted to write aren't as difficult i've started the bike now i'm pedaling life is good another starting system was one that my brother was telling me about he was having trouble getting up out of bed in the morning he just kept hitting snooze on his alarm clock which i think we all can relate to and so we got this app called barcode alarm clock the alarm on your phone won't turn off until you scan a barcode so he would set that barcode

to the coffee in his kitchen so he would have to get up walk to the kitchen now he's at the coffee he may as well make himself the coffee and now he is awake what i really like here is he made starting pretty much non-negotiable the second bucket of starting things is eliminating friction i went through a dark period of my life where i was a 5 am gym guy i'm sorry that was wrong i shouldn't have done it but i remember when i was starting to build this habit i would use any excuse not

to go to the gym so my alarm would go off at 5 00 am and i'd be like well i don't know where my shoes are in this exact moment guess i'm sleeping eliminating friction is just having all your gym gear set out the night before the late mitch hedberg had this joke about bread you know that petra's farm better that stuff is fancy man it's wrapped twice you open it and it still ain't open that's why i don't buy it i don't need another step between me and toast eliminating friction is taking out the

steps between you and whatever your toast is if it's drawing it's having your book and pencil ready to go before you start work if it's running it's having all your gear in one spot so you don't have to look around the house trying to find them and if you've got a passion for art heists and you want to steal the mona lisa it's all about having your gloves and grappling hook by the door not in your storage locker not in the cupboard make it easy eliminate that friction you've got this steal that artwork step six

have a good method to sustain things this step is all about making sure you don't burn out we don't want that discipline can exhaust you now with this step i will just say as a big disclaimer i don't have a chronic illness i don't have kids i'm working with a pretty able body and a pretty open schedule so i am playing on easy mode you might be playing on hard mode so you might need more rest or you might need more time for your family for example but for me the most sustainable method and i

hate that this is true is the work week the actual monday to friday nine to five this never used to be true for me but taking weekends has been the biggest change to me being able to sustain discipline without burning out and what this looks like tangibly is if it's monday to friday nine to five i'm working i take nights i take weekends i make sure i sleep all of that your system might look totally different but what you want to find is a weekly or a daily or a monthly routine then make sure that

you are not getting exhausted way easier said than done but yeah this step is about finding a sustainable routine and finding what you can do when you're not working that fills you with energy and if you are looking for what energizes you just at the end of every day for about a month ask yourself just a notes app on your phone what energized me today and then at the end of the month look for the commonalities i can pretty much guarantee that there'll be something that shows up a lot more than other things and for

me if i do more of that thing it stops me from burning out step seven at some point the only true path is to just do it i find any time that i'm looking for a hack that side steps just do it i've already lost and when i say just do it i am talking about literally doing the work doing the workout stealing a mona lisa but thankfully what i have found is you can make just doing it come more naturally with something called discomfort training we're all familiar with that probably zen buddhist quote how

you do anything is how you do everything the way that you act in small situations will often be the way that you act in bigger ones discomfort training is something that uses this to your advantage it's like going to the gym for your willpower and it's a way of building up that muscle so that you'll have it there ready to go when you actually just need to just do it so how do you get your reps in how do you actually build up the willpower what is discomfort training it's pretty simple it's just doing small

things that make you uncomfortable it's basically in micro moments in your life choosing the less comfortable option for example if you're somebody who gets bored easily next time you're in a waiting room or in a queue don't pull out your phone that's discomfort training baby the most common example i hear is having cold showers for me the most common example i use is the two minute rule if something takes less than two minutes i do it immediately and by practicing discomfort in these small moments the idea is that it builds up and creates discipline throughout

the rest of your life [Music] so you feeling more disciplined the reality is that discipline and resistance are lifelong battles we're all just climbing a mountain with no top but the cool part is if you get the foundation the mindset right it makes it so much easier ain't that right steve i believe in each and every one of you steve subscribe if you're new if you want my book it's out now the links are in the description your head is a houseboat all about mental health and mental clarity so give it a shot if you

can have an amazing day and good luck with discipline catcher