What It's Like To Be A Redhead In A Family Of Blondes

hi I'm Sally and I figured out two things very early in life one my older sister Rachel is dumb and two she really hates me Rachel is a year older than me but it didn't take me too long to catch up with her I was talking before she did and I learned how to read while she was still struggling with the alphabet my parents loved showing me off and I think it really bothered Rachel sweetie why don't you recite the poems you learned for our guests Sally tell your aunt the cool thing that you read

in your encyclopedia yesterday just then Rachel came running wearing her bathing suit over her clothes look at me I look like a mermaid in my BB suit you're what my baby soup mom baby soup this oh you don't understand anything I say oh just help me take it off it's stuck in my limbo I think she's saying her bathing suit is stuck in her elbow Mom oh I see Sally you're so bright silly Rachel did I mention that I sometimes taught Rachel the wrong words because it was funny when she sounded stupid yeah I'm not

very proud of that now but that's not the only reason she hated me I was the only one in my family with red hair and my parents loved it especially mom who would do all sorts of hairstyles Sally your hair looks so magical let's try braids today you know why it looks magical because she's a leopard clown you mean a leprechaun she told me all the time that my parents pretended to like my red hair so I wouldn't feel bad when you were born Mom and Dad cried tears of ugliness for days they even tried

to give you up for adoption but no one wanted you and one time she even tried to chop my hair off and things got worse when in eighth grade she failed a class and ended up being with me as if our parents weren't enough our history teacher Miss Sheldon loved comparing her to me in front of everyone your assignment is just appalling Rachel did you see your sisters why can't you be more like her didn't you do any research what's there to research someone ugly said something dumb to someone boring a long time ago and

then some lame war broke out who cares about this stuff a person who wants to have an educated mind who cares what's on the inside when the package is this pretty looks are not important that's ugly people talk did your boyfriend ever say that oh wait I bet you've never had one detention now the next day before history class I saw Rachel putting a mug of coffee on Miss Sheldon's table while everyone else was snickering I was instantly suspicious Rachel what are you up to what I'm just trying to make up for my behavior yesterday

what did you put in there oh I don't know maybe some spit maybe some laxative maybe both who can say just then miss Sheldon walked in and Rachel handed her the mug sweetly with an apology but I tried taking it away from her I really don't think you should have that why I uh I just don't think it's a good idea why is there something in the coffee Sally tell me now no I just don't think you need to drink coffee um it gives you really a bad breath give that to me please I ended

up spilling the whole thing on her white coat oh my god you dumb butt kisser you ruined my whole plan the next thing I knew I was in detention too with Rachel for the very first time in my life but suddenly Rachel was freaking popular no one liked Miss Sheldon much and everyone thought Rachel was super cool for trying to mess with her and now she was used to her Newfound power to turn everyone against me she was the beautiful fun blonde and I was the red-haired nerdy sister being called things like carrot top and

ketchup head boy could girls be mean eventually the teasing got old or I just learned to ignore it but soon I was given an assignment in history class to do a presentation on Scotland the more I studied the happier I felt there were so many cool red-headed Scots and I definitely felt better about my hair before class I went to the bathroom to change into a kill I had spent hours making myself just for the presentation but just then my sister walked in she pulled out her phone and started taking pictures going back home leprechaun

buzz off Rachel you look so stupid what is that a school girl skirt it's a kilt get out of my way you can't leave yet leprechauns can't travel without a rainbow with that she pulled out some paints from her backpack and squirted them all over my outfit I ran out of the bathroom crying angry tears Rachel did get detention but it was her millionth time and she didn't give a hoot the next year I got a fresh start our dad had gotten a new job across the state which meant I was going to be going

to a new high school I was determined to end the teasing that my red hair gave me hey Mom now that I'm 16 I think I should get to make some choices about my hair I'd like to change the color but your hair is beautiful sweetie I know you like it Mom but I just want to try something a little more mature you know I guess if that's what you want you're growing up so fast thanks Mom I ran straight to the the store and bought a box of black hair dye and it worked my

hair was dark and silky no more red do you think that'll fool anyone you can't cover up what you are a little Leprechaun whatever Rachel don't you have something stupid to do go away just saying the truth always comes out the first day of school was like a dream come true no one said anything about my hair I blended right in and even got a few compliments on my cute outfit which I'd added some accessories to myself Rachel was right back in with the cheerleaders but this was the first time she and I were in

a co-ed school and being around boys was making her even dumber the football captain and I went out last night but he never called or texted me back I don't get it I think he was even hiding from me in school okay how did the date go it was amazing like we were meant to be there was just one awkward moment when this weird girl came to our table and started flirting with him and I bit her hand really hard I'm sure she got the message that he's not interested in her he was just too

nice to say it you scared him off you psycho how about you don't act like a jealous blood-sucking vampire next time but she continued her serial dating and getting heartbroken and I was getting sick of her stories it's not like she took my advice other than that school was going great I was doing well in my classes and had even joined the drama club as a costume designer a play was being held soon but the main actor fell ill right before the performance I had to make sure his understudy fit in the costume but I

didn't even recognize him I ran frantically through the dressing room shouting hey is there anyone named Skyler here uh yeah that's me okay I need you to take off your clothes right now he grinned and I blushed as people around us started laughing I I mean I didn't okay wait let me start over you need to try this on right now and I have to make sure this fits you I'm the costume person not a pervert I know I've seen you around Sally right I'll just change into this and be right back this Skyler was

freaking cute and he knew my name his shirt was missing a button and my heart was skipping beats as I stitched it on there you're all set thanks Sally wish me luck break your legs I mean a leg only one single it's just a figure of speech anyway gosh I sounded dumber than Rachel so I was quite surprised when Skyler came and sat next to me at recess the next day he was funny and sweet and I was having a great time talking to him by the way I'm part of the student council and currently

we're deciding on a theme for the homecoming dance any ideas I can never think of anything other than Sports themes if you like sports maybe you could do the Scottish Highland Games wow I love Scottish stuff this is a really good idea thanks Sally just then Rachel dropped her butt right next to him mind if I join your table I'm Rachel Sally's sister don't mind at all also I couldn't help overhearing your conversation homecoming is all about the football games we should totally do a varsity theme I'll wear my cheerleading outfit it'll be so cool

well I was fuming I couldn't believe she was butting herself into this too didn't she have enough guys to date she just couldn't let me be happy I spent the rest of lunch just sitting there and listening to them talk about school sports a couple of weeks passed and neither Skyler nor Rachel talked to me but I was busy with my studies and my friends and I was happy for a change I wasn't gonna be bothered by some guy I barely knew but then one day Skyler stopped me in the hall on the way to

class hey Sally wait up sorry I haven't been around much I've been super busy getting everything ready for homecoming week oh yeah it's whatever I've been really busy too well I hope you're not too busy to maybe go to the dance with me I mean if you aren't going with anyone else the dance with you I'd love to great I'll meet you there I couldn't believe it no teasing new friends and even a date to homecoming I was practically skipping everywhere the rest of the day until I got home word around school is that Skyler

asked you to homecoming yeah and well I'm here to tell you that he isn't going with you he is going with me says who says this she held up her phone and showed me the picture she had taken of me in a kilt with my bright red hair hey get rid of that tell him you can't go with him or I show this picture to the entire school no don't you dare it's up to you fine I didn't want to go to that stupid dance anyway the next day at school I told Skyler I wasn't

gonna go to the dance with him he tried to change my mind but there was no way I was gonna let him see that picture of me he looked a bit hurt and I felt awful but I didn't have a choice the night of the dance I tried to stay home but the thought of Rachel laughing and having fun with Skyler made me feel like I might explode I quickly got ready then sped my car to the dance I burst through the doors and saw Rachel dancing surrounded by her friends but I didn't see Skyler

anywhere just then there was a hand on my shoulder Sally I thought she couldn't make it yeah me too because I was scared scared of what of you finding out the truth Rachel was beside us with her phone in her hand within a few seconds everyone's phones were going off including skylers he pulled it out of his pocket and opened a message and there was that picture of me she had sent it to everyone wait is that you Sally you know what yeah that is me I dyed my hair black but it's actually red as

a tomato and if you hate it then you're all just cello stupid hate it I love it what what Sally you're cool the way you are so are you may I have this dance you may just give me one second though listen you bimbo I kept putting up with you and making excuses for your behavior but I've had enough you tried your best to humiliate me but it was an epic failure so in your face now please get a life and act less desperate and I'm sure you'll be able to land a boyfriend with the

same IQ as you just leave me alone okay that weekend I took the dye out of my hair and Rachel dyed hers red but it wasn't real not like mine I was beautifully redheaded and very happy to be me