Absurd Historical Fashion that Needs to Come Back

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BlueJay
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Video Transcript:
fashion is riddled with rules and laws that are seemingly nonsensical but are often followed more rigorously than real ones for example you may see a man commit armed robbery but heaven forbid he does it with a pair of Skechers on 20 to life is not a problem but can you imagine how it would feel to be socially ridiculed I sure can't not me gee willikers that sounds terrible take the phrase sometimes always never no this isn't a game of smash or pass or a sorority girl listing her liquor preferences it's the rule that stipulates the
bottom button of a suit jacket should never be fastened today it seems second nature but where did this seemingly Common Sense rule originate is it a remnant of some old custom perhaps as its roots in a unique cultural tradition no King Edward VII was just too chunky to fit that gun in so everyone followed their King's half dress style like good little peasants except for me I leave the top button undone because I follow a different King and also ew British but the jacket button rule is pretty mild and only the tip of the fashion
trend Iceberg until oh boy how deep and bizarre does this Iceberg go so today we're gonna take a deep dive into some of the most absurd Trends Styles and fashion throughout history again [Music] why don't you kick us off Benjamin got a favorite fashion era in history I'm a big fan of mid-1900s German fashion okay gonna try not to read into that but all right well mid 20th century Germany saw a more uh authoritarian style of fashion you've got tailored suits Trindle dresses and nothing was more popular than a massive hole in your chest cavity
uh what oh you didn't know all the cool drafted boys were wearing it the style was best achieved by facing a Russian t-34 on the Eastern front but unfortunately for you that method isn't around anymore so if you want to achieve this fashion and be one of the cool kids I recommend playing World of Tanks World of Tanks is a free to play PC game where you can toy around with a massive arsenal of all kinds of big Hong and tanks and huge online battles historical accuracy is the name of the game in World of
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video I want a cool chest hole you go get em champ now where were we ah yes it's Victorian London and a contagion is spreading Street by Street Town by Town woman can be seen struggling as they try to walk down the road their stride impaired by an awkward limp many supporting their weight on canes but what is rather peculiar is that it seems only wealthier women are affected by this illness and wait a minute polio wasn't a thing yet and these hoes are smiling so as the British would say Raul saw this then well
to understand this limp let me introduce you all to Alexandra of Denmark the Princess of Wales was a 19th century fashion icon who enjoyed the exceptional Adoration of the public she was radically stylish a big charity worker second hardest Alexander in history and a lifelong hater of Germans so all around pretty based this meant that whatever the Royal did the masses would blindly follow like a 19th century K-pop Star wearing a radical new dress style the people did too Joker covering a childhood scar why not hold my leash life-threatening rheumatic fever leaving her with a
permanent limp Count Me In I love Forrest Gump that's right Alexandra's influence on fashion was so strong that it transcended just Petty physical garments to include physical ailments as well so not long after Alexander began limping in public where London's fashion followers seen Waltzing down the streets like they were covered with Legos in their best attempt to come off as Quirky little cripples woman would stumble about with canes and even go as far as wearing different size shoes for a more authentic handicap oh Edward I absolutely adore your limp tell me how do you put
it off I have cerebral palsy oh I must inquire my cobbler about that brand and your gain is just a dog while at first the style was more DIY in nature the more cunning shoemakers came to realize that there was a golden opportunity to make a fat stack so they began selling shoes with different sized heels to help the upper classes biggest fascia anistas achieved that oh so desirable crippled shride here we have some of my finest work oh how beautiful you've outdone yourself Henry now Madam I noticed as you Strode in that you pot
took in the limp is that right why yes I'm delighted you've noticed it's quite remarkable reminds me of my nephew stride oh stop it you are quite the charmer I did watch a few struggling children from my Carriage the other day to study it they're quite adorable yes he died a few months ago now anyway I wanted to see if you'd be interested in our limited edition upgrade to these fine pair of shoes you've selected using some precise and refined craftsmanship we can perform a modification on these for even more authentic limp oh please Henry
I must stay updated on fashion ah yes of course of course one moment please that'll be 200 pounds like most Trends the Alexandra Lim came with its fair share of critics as multiple news outlets would often denounce the practice with some rather colorful language I don't know how exactly the aristocratic woman responded to the criticism but I'm sure they had plenty of time to think about it as they staggered the way down in the printing press it's not a face but it was a face and one that died quicker than The Witcher Show's fan base
thankfully fashion is like a pendulum so I'm sure whatever Trend that followed proved to be much more practical and Mild ah [ __ ] our next fashion staple takes place a few hundred years back in medieval Europe you know what I need an audience say Tim you know those medieval paintings with dudes wearing pointy shoes like they're doing a Shrek 4 cosplay can you guess why those are popular no no the radiation stuff is done you're supposed to leave me alone now ah close actually the shoes were named kipples after the mythical Hag from polish
folklore scosy kipple known for breaking into people's homes to smear wax all over their cooking utensils so people wore these pointy shoes to mocks go see kipple's abnormal feet believing that the trickster would be so offended that she would crawl back into her Hut with her mood for trickery completely ruined or really no that's stupid why would you believe that there were just some sick ass pointy shoes you don't need an excuse to be that stylish these long-tipped kicks ruled the world of fashion and Medieval Europe between the 12th and 15th centuries and while they
weren't named after that mythical creature I pulled out of my ass they were named after something equally miserable Poland specifically the shoes were named krakos after the city in Poland were the Fashion's popularity originated the long-toed shoes were worn by both men and women however it was the former who took the fashion to the extreme most toes weren't more than half the length of the shoe but the rich could Don tips as long as 20 inches and the even wealthier were said to have their little piggy stretched so long they had to get tied up
at the shin just to be able to walk all fighting the proof that they had the longest and girthiest uh shoes as for why they were popular I mean come on isn't it obvious um daggers uh no but points for creativity they were popular for the same reason that people wear fanny packs raw sex appeal and I completely agree I mean come on look at my boy here looking like he better moonwalk his way down to Ye Old Tavern to pick up some Fair maidens they were truly worn for All Occasions and while they didn't
hide a hidden blade like some Assassin's Creed leprechaun people did wear them into battle to make them grippers look as dangerous as possible the Knights of the Duke of Austria Leopold III often wore krakos on Horseback however in one engagement they had to Dismount to fight on foot so they were forced to cut off the tips of their shoes and toss them in a huge pile so they could run around and get to stabbing all right let's get a killing Gary you coming Gary krakows ultimately fell out of style in the 1480s it's unfortunate that
the style didn't last a few more centuries I would have loved to see Cinderella with glass crackles instead of slippers no that's not right there we go today you can still find crack on inspired boots called twinkle Pickers which sounds like some Hulu knockoff version of the peaky blinders so it checks out that they're from England but over on the other side of the pond these pointy kicks went by a much more refined name roach Stompers while the origin behind the name might seem rather obvious I prefer my head Cannon those are some mighty fine
boots paw why thank you son they're about the only good thing to come out of that tea drinker country since the White Flag but I just can't wrap my head around this name of this Winkle pinkles Whipple Snappers fickle pickles dag nabbits I needs to call them something different [Music] but finkelwinkles might not be for everyone so if you're looking to crank that eccentric dial to the max there's always Mexican pointy boots pineapples are known to evoke a lot of emotion from people from pure joy when asked who lives in one under the sea to
utter hatred when seen placed upon a Cheesy grease wheel so it shouldn't be too surprising to learn that back in the day these little prickle cones went for as much as eight thousand dollars in today's money the popularity of pineapples originates in 1493 when Italian explorer Christopher Columbus discovered the little tree fruit on the Caribbean island of Guadalupe Welcome to our Island we are pleased wow such vivid colors what zesty flavor oh a little bit of bite as well what a majestic and dangerous Muse you are I can't believe I discovered this I am the
first human being in all of time to lay eyes upon this sour Delight I shall call it the Pina day in this uh excuse me but it's pronounced Master everyone was crazy for these spiky Delights though given how far they had to travel to reach Europe typically only nobility and monarchs were able to get their grubby little paws on them some of the wealthiest even built greenhouses to mimic the tropical conditions required to grow pineapples King Charles II was so infatuated with the fruit that he went as far as to commission a literal painting showing
his gardener on his knee presenting it with one glorious prickly boy which might seem like a bit much to you and me but keep in mind this is before Instagram made flexing as easy as taking a pic on top of a four-story parking garage in the midwest so they had to go all out but without desired how lavish and how revered these exotic fruits were it would be a shame to merely eat them then your pineapple would be gone how would everyone know how cool you were with your luscious fruit all hidden away inside your
stomach so in the American colonies of the 1700s pineapples were used primarily as decorations and were only finally eaten once they started going bad people put them in centerpieces they were shown up at parties forget the baby there's no room for that clingy leech when you're busy taking your pineapple out for a stroll can't afford one no problem you could rent one make everyone think you're rich enough to be a pineapple boy they were even sometimes protected with their own security detail John hey your party is awesome thanks man thanks hey if you want to
see something really cool come with me check out this bad boy holy [ __ ] is that is that a pineapple yeah dude an American model too none of that import trash god damn how many spikes did she packing wow I can't touch pineapple dead outside of throwing tea in Harbors a pineapple was the ultimate Colonial Flex so whatever there was an opportunity for a pineapple then a pineapple there will be got a teapot now it's a pineapple building a dome why not a tropical one how about a pineapple helmet they didn't have pineapple helmets
but I think it's a hilarious missed opportunity pineapples were also the universal symbol of hospitality put it on a sign and it meant guests are welcome when the sun was gone it meant to get the hell out and when it was upside down well that means they're swingers but that's a topic for another video on a different website fast forward to 1900 and Along Comes young industrialist James Dole who was looking to kick-start large-scale Pineapple distribution with a Plantation in Hawaii it was a huge success and for many decades James supplied upwards of 75 percent
of the global pineapple Supply but for the world's upper class this meant that not only were the middle class not able to get the spiky fruit but by God even the Dreadful working class could too so the esteemed status of the pineapple soon died off hello Caroline what do you think of this ah yes a pineapple I just came from the market where Tom was buying a few what Tom the coal miner the poor fellow well yes I suppose carrying a few pineapples just like yourself James's company would go on to become the Dual food
company which is notable today for being a large fruit producer and disappointing you with fruit snacks that aren't the Scooby-Doo ones as for Dole himself his efforts in the pineapple business would later earn him the nickname the pineapple King and to that I say what better Crown than a pineapple helmet weird fashion too 9 out of 10 Stars [Music] [Applause] [Music] [Applause] [Music]
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