Principles For Male & Female Relationships ❃Myles Munroe❃

to really bring as many of your unsaved relatives tomorrow uh i wish i had a chance pastor to teach on a subject maybe sunday evening i'll talk a little bit about it but there's a book that you'll find on the table called the purpose and power of praise and worship and i really would have loved to share that with you because i don't think we understand the importance of why we should praise and worship the lord i think the title of the book is the purpose and power of praise and worship because for many years

i've done many sessions on praise and worship but didn't really concentrate on why we should do it and i began about two years ago we we host a major conference in the bahamas every year it's called asap where we bring people together from around the world to study and address the issue of praise and worship and ron canole has been a part of that conference for many years along with phil driscoll and many others and last year we began to explore the reason for praise and worship and why we do it and as i began

to press into the word on that the lord transformed my understanding and that is he began to show me the value of praise and worship and why we need to do it and tomorrow evening i really want to encourage you i want to to stress how important it is for you to bring people tomorrow to the sessions because it's going to be a life-changing experience amen today i want to pick up where i left off y'all interested i want all the men to say amen please get your bibles and turn with me to the book

of matthew chapter 19. this chapter we've been exploring an answer that was given to an important question one out of every three marriages in this country will end in divorce based on the statistics that we have in the united states it is said that one out of every two marriages will end in divorce that means the chances of a person staying together is fifty percent that means for every five people that go before the altar five of them will end in tragedy called divorce i've done a very extensive research and also i've done a lot

of teaching in the area of divorce and marriage one of our best-selling books addresses the subject the book is entitled single married separated and life after divorce the book has sold over 500 000 copies and i was shocked at the success of that book because i didn't expect that so many people had so many problems but then i began to appreciate that we were dealing with some issues that the church is very quiet about and the government doesn't know how to stop and the sociologists don't know how to deal with it and that is the

problems of relationship by the way i think it would be good for me at this moment to just pause and introduce someone very important to me i want you to meet my very precious and special son charo monroe please stand up this is miles junior give a big welcome to london my wife and i have two beautiful children and he is my only son of my loins i love him so much he's a a student in school he is an academic and an athletic award student and he's about to begin college in a few months

and very disciplined young man who loves the lord i'm very proud of him divorce is not only a major problem but it was a major problem 2 000 years ago and before divorce is as old as the fall moses was the first person that we know in history to do something officially about marital disintegration moses developed a legislation introduced a bill in his constitutional course of leading a nation of over one million people of course he had to deal with these social problems and he developed a bill that he introduced among the people to prevent

people from destroying each other and that's why he introduced the bill of divorcement the ability of osmo meant that a man in those days of course women were were less likely to have more rights than they do today a man was the one to initiate this very traumatic horrifying experience of of officially separating a union and so in matthew 19 we find that the pharisees and scribes approached jesus and asked him about his view of divorce and jesus answered that question but he ignored the issue in the sense that he really didn't deal with divorce

because based on his answer he didn't see divorce as a problem jesus saw divorce as a symptom a problem has to do with a cause a symptom has to do with a sign so divorce is a sign that something else is wrong it's like a pain in the body when there's a pain in your body the pain is not the problem the pain is an indication that there is a problem in fact your body was created by god to be such a unique machine that whenever something was wrong with your body the neurological system which

is your nervous apparatus will communicate to your brain that something is wrong somewhere and the neurological impulses would send the signal of that problem to the brain the brain would then send a signal back to that area and tell the area to emit a signal that there's a problem there the signal that the area emits is called pain so when you feel the pain the pain is not the problem the pain is your neurological system telling your whole body that something's wrong in that location and so you can then act and pursue the problem divorce

is that same way the fact that there's so many problems in our families and disintegrating marriages and broken homes is not the problem the problem is something else is wrong and divorce is the symptom that's why divorce is so painful let me say something about divorce i want you to never forget divorce is worse than death write that down please divorce is worse than death and here's why as a matter of fact the word divorce is from the greek word apostasian an apostasian is a big word but it simply means to defect to defect write

that down so to divorce a person means you have defected defection is used in the military when a person have committed themselves to fight for a army or a cause when you join the army of a country or the navy or the marines you have committed yourself to fight for that country is that right is that right now i want you to write this down whenever you join an army you have committed yourself not to live but to die armies are not motivated by life armies are motivated by debt in other words when you join

an army the best they can offer you is death you don't fight in a war with the guarantee you're going to survive they can guarantee you that you might die now if you survive then they say you're a hero hello somebody in other words when you join an army you've committed yourself to death well the word used for divorce is the same word that is used for the military and that is when you walk down an aisle and you commit yourself to another person the man to the woman and the woman to the man you're

not committing yourself to life and that's why marriages don't work because we keep getting married for life little heavy isn't it when you walk down the aisle you are joining yourself to someone just like you join yourself to an army and you are deciding that the only way i will be separated from you is by death now when you join an army and you decide with your brothers and your colleagues that you had enough of this uh the the enemy is too strong the the weapons they have are too awesome and you become afraid intimidated

by the environment you become you're becoming so frightened by the reality that you decide to your colleagues you say to them i am no longer going to stay with you i'm going to turn back i'm going back home to be a civilian then the army calls that defection the greek word is divorce what do you do when a soldier defects talk to me you don't call it martial you kill that brother caught martial is formality when someone defects what they've done is they have turned their backs on their very own flesh and the only thing

a defector deserves in the military is death why because the only thing that's supposed to separate you from your colleague is death so if the enemy don't do it for you come on understand the principle i just had a thought in your mind i see that thought if you ever leave me i will i can see the thought right now and that's exactly how you feel huh you ever heard this if i can't have you that's the spirit of defection see i give you my whole life i give you my body i gave you my

emotions i gave you my entire future i gave you everything and you are going to turn your back on it it's defection now why is divorce worse than death here's why when a person dies you take them to the mog they place them in a box you have a funeral everybody wears black you go to this place called the church you have a ceremony you take them to the cemetery you put them in a hole you put dirt on them there's closure you don't see them anymore ah but divorce it's worse than that because when

you get a divorce it's dead the marriage is finished you bury it you walk away and then you go to the food store and there's resurrection again and that's why it's worse than death because they keep coming back you stand on the tube and there they are you stand in the bus stop there they are they show up in the drugstore there they are you go to the park there they are and heaven help you they show up in church and there they are you see it's the kind of death that's never closed and when

there's children involved that's why god says i hate divorce i hate it there's no arrangement in god's program for divorce moses wrote a bill not god so we find the question being asked here by jesus by the disciples rather i mean the pharisees they said should a man divorce his wife for any reason matthew 19 3 his response haven't you read that at the beginning it was not so he made them male and female for this reason should a man leave his mother and father cleave unto his wife and the two shall be united and

become one flesh and then he goes on to say therefore whatever god joins together let no man put asunder i think what he was saying here is that god don't join everybody together now this gets a little deep here the only people that god really joins together are those who qualify in this verse he says in the beginning it was not so so the people that god joins together are the people that he identifies in this verse he says divorce is not your problem he says your problem is who you joined together and you're not

joining together who god joins together who did god join together well he qualifies it he says haven't you read that at the beginning it was not so in other words at the beginning god made a male and a female and that's the only two that should be joined together with a guarantee that they'll make it for life and for death and that is the two that are in the beginning and we talked yesterday about the kind of mail that is in the beginning i need a mail can i have a mail are you sure you

are a male can i have you please can you come i need a mail give the lord half a real meal praise god some males in short emails now it's important to note i want to do something here demonstrate something so i need you to stand up here for me stand on the top of that end of the step from the top right here okay i want to show you something it's down at the top right there right at the top now i want everybody to kind of make sure you can see where he is

i want to show you something okay now if you notice that god only created one human being from the soil he never went back today we have 6.2 billion people on earth but god only made one from the soil he never went back today we got six billion but god only made one from the soil he never went back and the first one that god made was male that's important remember everyone who's building anything the first thing they lay is the foundation is that right foundation is first and secondly the foundation is usually never seen

after it's laid it's quiet it's always underneath the building but the foundation is the most important part of the building because it holds up the entire structure and carries the weight of everything which means then that the foundation must be given a lot of attention to more money goes into a foundation than the whole building did you know that contractors will tell you that when they're laying the foundation they gotta dig down to bedrock and then they put all the steel and all the water all the concrete and they reinforce it and reinforce it and

they build the foundation based on the proposed weight of the structure including the furniture the people and all the decorations and everything else in other words the engineer will calculate the weight of the entire building before he would give the specifications for the foundation because the foundation have to carry even the weight of the clothing is on the people that's going to be sitting in the office and the chair and the desk and the typewriter and all of the computers everything it has to be calculated and so the weight of the foundation is not laid

until we understand the entire building now watch what god does before god began the human family god calculated everything that it would take to carry the weight of human family and god's conclusion was i'm going to construct a foundation and i'm going to call it male so the male man was built to carry all the weight of the family most males are not aware of this so they run away from responsibility every male in this room was designed by god to carry the entire weight of your entire family you're built for it if you got

10 children you could carry that now let me explain why whatever something comes out of sustains it listen carefully and that's where the word father comes from father means source and sustainer the male came out of god god created the male out of himself that means the male source is god himself so god is the father of the male it gets heavy here but the female did not come from the soil the female came out of the male which means that the male has become the source of the female we learned yesterday that sauce is

the hebrew word abba which we translate what father so the male is the father of the female she's he is the source and the sustainer of the female the word father means source and sustainer which means whatever you source you got to sustain now i need somebody uh uh let's see i need a tall person is anybody here seven feet can you come help me here you look tall come i mean you man you should be glad to come i'm about to make you god stand behind him please well you ain't quite anyhow you you

survive now the male came out of who god god is responsible for creating the mail but watch this then god created the female i need a lady please can i have a lady you want to be on tv here's your chance come on girl thank you very much she's pretty too boy i tell you stand in front of him stand on the front of him that's good all right so now we have the female coming out of the mail now remember christ's answer was to have a good marriage you got to go back to the

beginning so you got to study what a male is like in the beginning and you got to study what a female is like in the beginning and once you can find that these two qualify by that criteria then that marriage will work so before you marry someone you've got to check them against the checklist of the beginning so don't just marry anybody make sure you marry the right ingredients what christ was saying was divorce is not your problem the problem is the material that you use for the marriage ain't no good see you can't get

a divorce unless you were married and you can't get mad unless there were two individuals and the accounts business there was one individual in other words it begins with the one and then it be then it produces the other and then you have the two now i need a a male and female can i have a male and female can you come yeah come on now here give a good hand to our pianist boy he's all right i tell you turn around and step right there stand next to him please i want to show you

all something now now once you see how this is building we got god who produced adam the male who produced eve the woman so god is the father of the male the male is the father of the female and when you put them two together you produce a marriage so marriage is when those two come together and they are the right ingredients now i'm going to show you why family is the key to the whole thing now what kind of male is the beginning male let's write down the things we learned yesterday number one the

first thing about the first male is that he had a clear self-image he knew he was the image of god that means you don't want to marry a man who's still trying to be like other people you want to marry a man who knows who he is he knows his self-image he doesn't need anyone's approval to feel important he doesn't try to dress like other people and wear everybody's style he doesn't go around trying to buy nikes and trying to be tommy hilfiger trying to wear you know calvin klein and he's trying to be somebody

else trying to fix his hair like other people and trying to be a rapper or trying to be cool he wants somebody who knows he's somebody with anybody being anybody you want a man whose self-confidence and self-image is in god not in any style or any role model somewhere else second thing about this man is that god took the man and placed him in the garden of eden the word eden means presence please get that book on praise and worship to understand what that word means eden so the first thing is the man has a

good clear image self-image secondly he as well in the presence of god the third thing about the male man that's important important is that the male man was given the first command and that is work so you want a male man who is working and loves to work you meet him working the fourth thing about the male man in genesis chapter 1 and chapter 2 rather you find that this man in verse 15 god secondly told him to cultivate that means you need a mailman who can cultivate you to cultivate means to bring the best

out of to develop you to advance you don't marry a man who cannot improve you i've met ladies who've got a good job good education got a nice car a nice apartment got her own life going together and then she marries a bum she marries a guy who drives her car eats her food watches her television sleeps in her apartment while she's out to work that's not a woman that's a fool you don't marry a man who decreases your value you want to marry a guy who will increase and improve your value some of you

ladies get so desperate because you're 30. you grab anything that comes along in the pants and destroy your quality life the fifth thing that this man is genesis 2 15 god told a man to guard the garden that means a true male is a protector if a man can't protect you he's not deserving of being your husband a true male protects females he doesn't use his strain to abuse them and hurt them and domestically violate them he doesn't rape them he doesn't cause date rape or beat his wife or harass his children or commit incest

on his little girl or sodomize his son that's not a real man buy this tape for someone you know a real man protects everything under his care as a matter of fact the best things that's supposed to be heard by a man when he comes home is when his wife says daddy's home now everything's okay the most beautiful thing a child should say to a father is my daddy's home now you touch me he'll kill you that's what a child needs to say and a mother needs to say about her husband she's going to be

able to say my my warrior in shining armor is here my protector has arrived he's a guard and then number six the real man is the man who god says do not touch the tree this is my command that's found in verse 17 of genesis 2. in other words the the male was given the word of god not the female which means that the male was designed by god to be the teacher of the word one who keeps the word and that means the male supposed to be the one who knows the word and commandments

of god to communicate to his family that means a real man knows this book called the bible back to front don't marry a man who can't teach you the word and some of y'all is too late there are men who know the name of everybody on the soccer team but can't list the disciples they know the score of every game the last year but don't know the chapters in habakkuk they spend hours watching television football but spend no hours in the word of god that's not a good man to marry i'm gonna preach it baby

man you've got to be like adam if you want to guarantee a good home so he must be aware of his image in god he must be in the presence of god love to be in the presence of god don't marry a man that you got to drag to church don't marry a man that you got to encourage to have devotions in the home don't marry a man who stands up at his arms full while everybody is worshiping don't marry a cool fool somebody's just cool you know worship is for women man i'm cool man

i ain't got simon no fool man i'm a brother man i'm cool no you're a fool man if you study the word of god all the priests all the priests who worship were male you know who were god's best friends three worshipers and they were all men and some you say well men worshipping is for is for weak men worshipping is for sissies you know where should bring this photo jelly back man man oh really let me ask you a question you ever killed a nine-foot giant with a rock you ever killed a bear with

your bare hands you say you're a man you ever killed a lion with your own fist you ever killed ten thousand men with your own sword or you think you're a man you ever ran a country and built a city and established the most powerful empire in the world three thousand years ago built it from nothing you think you're a man what have you done you ever killed a giant who cursed at you and you cut his head off and you were just four feet and he was 10 feet you ever done that you ain't

no man until you can write the largest worship book in the bible by david you ain't a man yet real men worship say with me real man worship that's why god loved david he was a real man he wasn't a punk like you you can't handle pressure when a baby comes you can't buy milk and handle diapers you can't pay light bill on water bill you want to abandon the woman you ain't no man oh don't get me excited now i was about to give the women today i'm sorry hang on guys i'm i'm going

to get there don't worry i'm going to get there all the men say real man worship say it loud real man worship one more time give the lord a hand you learn that you make sure you be in church before your wife sitting on the front row of every church service from now on should be all the men don't drop your kids to worship service you lead them in the service lift your hands and show your wife how to do it and if you got a girlfriend you tell her right away if you don't want

to go to worship with me you can't be with me i'm talking to the brothers now if she don't want to go to church with you brother you better leave her out of your life real man worship god loved david because he was a worshiper he loved abraham because everywhere abraham stopped he built an altar what's an altar a worship center the guy loved to worship moses i mean moses told god i don't care what you do if your presence don't go with me i ain't going that's a real man a real man says i

don't gonna go without your presence real men worship now so god has a man watch this he has a male the male is in his image he's in his presence he's working he's cultivating he's protecting and he knows the word anybody got it he's in his image he's in his presence he's working he's cultivating and he knows the word and he's protecting anybody get it are you sure now this is important man christ says got to go back to the beginning man who's the beginning man he knows his image he's in god's presence he's working

he's cultivating he can protect and he knows the word then god says next verse it's not good for this man to be alone so the only man that shouldn't be alone is a man who knows his image who's in god's presence who's working can cultivate you can protect you and can teach you the word that means of a man doesn't know who he is is not in god's presence cannot cultivate you cannot protect you cannot teach you god's word it is good for that man to be alone so then god says it's good for this

man not to be alone to be all by himself to be all in one so god went inside the man and pulled out a another man and he built this one and made it a wound man so now we have a man with a womb so she's called a wound man they're both man but this one has a wound then god took the warm man listen carefully ladies and if you read the bible you've got to be careful how you read the bible don't read into the bible read out of the bible the bible says

he bought her to the man and presented her to him now the hebrew language here is very interesting god did not bring adam a wife god never told adam he will make him a wife he said i'd make him a helper suitable for him not a wife just a helper someone to help him carry out his dominion responsibility the word there is present present in hebrew means to parade before which means that god will never choose your mate he'll just parade people in front of you you got to make the choice uh-oh now we've been

taught by many people well the lord chose my spouse the lord no listen you think the lord is that stupid if god chose your mate then you could blame him for everything that's wrong in your marriage no it says god presented her to the man he paraded her in front of him and that's why god never touches the choice you choose who you want to marry your mom says you make your bed and you sleep in it right sure in other words whoever you marry that was your choice now there's some ladies walking around here

with some funny ideas they want a prophetic word about their husband you know but the lord told me brother you're supposed to marry me that's a lie or the lord said to me in a dream last night that when i see a man coming to church today with a green tie and a red pants that'll be the one and then ten guys show up in green ties and red pants see these funny things we go through see it's a lie if god chose your spouse he would violate your will and if god could choose without

your involvement then tell me this which is more important salvation or marriage salvation obviously is eternal and yet god can't choose your salvation he died for you went to hell for you rose again he has the power of death held in the grave he said right under power and he says now whosoever will you still gotta choose to be born again he can't born you again without your permission so if god can choose your salvation which is eternal how dare you think you'll choose your marriage which is temporary so stop the spooky stuff especially the

ladies the lord spoke to me that you were going to be my husband i'm already married now what do you do when that happens and i've had problems like this in my counseling sessions god doesn't choose your mate when god presented that woman parade her before adam if you read the bible carefully god didn't speak adam started talking and adam said whoa man god that's a good name adam said in genesis chapter 2 he says this is bone just like my bone the structure and flesh like my flesh there's no hair on her like the

animals i know no scales no feathers flesh just like mine a structure i've never seen a creature standing upright monkeys can't do it they gotta always be ladies you see so i'm not their cousin because they don't walk like me they walk like this that cancels evolution all right that finish all right and adam says i've never seen an animal with structure like mine upright bone just like my bone fresh just like my flesh i will call her wound man because she's the man taken out of me who has a womb then the next verse

adam began to prophesy he never should have prophesied and adam said for this cross god i think god blew his mind when he saw that lady he says for this course should a man leave anybody he was talking to who talking about his father god he said what is god should a man leave his father and his mother and cleave under this thing his wife and the two shall become one flesh what kind of woman is this woman let's talk about the woman then we're going to wrap it up all the men sit up straight

and smile it's going to be your time now woman that came out of adam now i'm going to give you a list up on the board you can write them down real quick the man is a spirit the woman is a spirit remember they're both man the man has no gender because he is spirit the woman have no gender because she's a spirit in other words spirits have no gender there's nothing in the bible referring to a male or female spirit so every female in here has a man on the inside a spirit being number

three the man the spirit man of god's nature the woman is also a man she's got god nature foughtly the man is eternal that's a spirit spirits cannot die the man and the woman is also eternal the man is the glory of god the nature of god the woman is the glory of god the nature of god the man is the image of god the woman is the image of god so all spiritually they are all equal by the way if you don't believe in women preaching then he has a solution close your eyes and

listen let the man preach if the house disturbs you then close your eyes so you can't see the house and let the resident preach you'll get it when i'm gone by the way i've heard ministers say i don't believe in women preaching women shouldn't be in the ministry my problem with that is simple who did jesus leave the world in the hands of a woman you missed it the church is not a man the church is a woman and he said to the woman go into all the world and well i'll leave that there you

can deal with that so every man in here is a part of a woman who's preaching it's quiet okay read the word deal with it yourself you see inside this female is a man she's a spirit being that's why the male and female are equal but different what makes them different is their bodies the house they live in now this female is unique let's see the difference between a male and female and see what kind of woman you need to marry first of all the male is dirt let's get the word humors from and the

female is dirt she's taken out of the man and god built her out of the man the female like the male is physical they're not spirit they are physical the man on the inside is spirit but the body is physical dirt thirdly the male is sensual the female is sensual in other words the bodies operate on senses faultly the male is the temple of the spirit well the female is a temple of the spirit fifthly the male must be managed well the female must also be managed these bodies need to be controlled by us managed

got no problem with that well here's the difficulty now the male was placed in the garden first the female was presented to the male in the eden second in other words the female met the man in the garden the issue is this you should always marry a man who you meet in the garden meet a man in the presence of the lord you can't go wrong you don't go out of the present lord to find a man and try to get him back into the presence of the lord she met adam in eden secondly the

mayor was given work first she was created to help him work number four the man was given the word first but she was not given the word directly which means that she was supposed to be the recipient of the word through the mail and fifthly he was given an assignment first she was assigned to dominate with him which means she's also a dominator well here comes the difficulty the male is a responsible head hair doesn't mean better it means responsible the female was sent to help him she's a helper secondly the male is the provider

he is the source she's supposed to be the incubator thirdly he's a cultivator she's supposed to be the producer fourthly he is the giver she's supposed to be the receiver he's a protector she's supposed to be the encourager he's a developer she's supposed to be the nurturer he is the source of the as a teacher she's supposed to be the resource the one who gives the commands after she learns them from her husband i'm moving quickly for a reason she he is the teacher but she is the prophetess now let me explain what a female

supposed to be let's go down the list first of all a female supposed to be a helper in other words a woman in the beginning was a woman who was designed by god and equipped by god to help a a male fulfill the assignment that god put him in in his life to do his vision so a woman is not a one who comes to destroy what the man's vision is you don't want to marry a woman who comes to tell you how to run your life all right let me explain this another way you

don't marry a man and then try to dictate how he's supposed to live ladies you're quiet all the men say amen it's your turn now so sit up straight and take it god says i will make for him a what a helper now a helper is not the one who runs the show you don't want a woman see the reason why marriages don't work it's because we got a monster a monstrous any creature with two heads a wise woman helps her husband achieve oh boy a good woman studies her husband you all better write this

stuff down a good woman studies her husband and she constantly she doesn't now listen carefully the difference she doesn't irritate him she doesn't criticize him secret lady what a real woman does is she keep asking him questions she tries to find out what his dream is what his vision is what his desires are her goal is to study him uh honey what do you want to do in the next 10 years sweetheart what do you see us coming to the next 20 years honey how do you see us developing in our children what do you

see the future of our home is baby can you tell me now what do you see for the business every item what are you going to do with you going to stay in this job forever what are you going to think about this what are you going to keep asking questions why you want to get his vision most women come home where you been how come you're doing nothing oh lazy thank you we ain't going nowhere what are we going with our family what's wrong with you you're just like my daddy you worse than my

daddy that's a stupid woman a woman from the beginning is a helper and you can't help somebody who you don't know the assignment even if your husband is not the ideal man you are supposed to help him become that maybe he doesn't know the bible like you but don't sit down and say let's have devotions and then you say to him why can't you find corinthians you're not helping the guy you're demeaning his ego you're destroying his pride no wonder why he doesn't devotions anymore you're supposed to buy him a bible with the little tabs

on the outside come on somebody you gotta help him when he can't find it tell him honey i know you could i i'm gonna wait till you find it baby cause i don't know where it is myself just go right ahead baby you can find corinthians come on honey i know you know how you got it baby yes sir now let's go to chapter six baby yeah i know you can read this now baby and i'm gonna believe everything you say baby help the man all the men say right on the bible says that a

woman builds her house with her hands but tears it down with her mouth all the men say um so women if you want to be blessed just shut up i better stop my time is just about gone all the men say help me don't kill me you are supposed to be a helper now let me tell you something about helping watch this the holy spirit is called the very same thing a woman is called he's called a paracletus which means one who comes alongside to help paraclete jesus called him comforter paraclete so the holy spirit

does not take over your life he never does he always comes to help you do what you are doing that's why it's not a prep a proper prayer for you to pray for the holy ghost take over a meeting he wouldn't do it that's an insult to him he's not built to take over a meeting if you don't plan he has nothing to do so man what you got to make sure you do is make sure the woman that comes into your life you have a plan for your life before she comes because you see

a woman comes loaded a woman comes with equipment ready to help she got intuition she got intelligence she got wisdom she got insight she got sensitivity she's got power she's got incubation she got all this anointing and she comes and she comes into your life to help you but if you ain't doing nothing she can't help you do nothing sit down ladies i'm not getting rid of you yet now some women come into man's life and the men are doing something but she is so possessed with her own importance that she believed that what she's

doing is more important than what she meets him doing and now she wants to tell him to forget what he's doing and try to do what she's doing that's usurping authority over a man stop it ladies man make sure you have a vision before you invite a woman into your life but women if you meet a man with a vision don't create two visions in the house submit your vision to his vision write the void vision down please v-i-s-i-o-n now write the prefix down die d i the prefix die means two t-w-o two now put

die in the front of vision what do you get division what's division two visions in the same place that means if a woman comes with her own vision and doesn't submit to the man's vision you got d vision that's the word for divorce so don't come at your bank account and tell your husband i'm gonna have my own bank account no no no the family is a business and you put all the resources in the same place and then if you decide as a company to divide the account you do it as a company don't

come there with your own private secret vision oh i need some time to teach you on this stuff you see we we got this idea that what is mine is mine what is yours is yours that ain't family that's division the woman is a helper not a destroyer secondly ladies you are a producer when the man cultivates you you produce things if a man gives you a sperm you produce a child if a man give you a home you produce a a beautiful house to live in if a man give you groceries you produce a

meal you are a producer and sometimes we produce things that ain't good for the man a woman is also a very important word an incubator god designed the female to be an incubator her whole body is incubation and incubators is something that gives life to everything if whatever you give an incubator it gives it life and it gives it back to you whenever you give an incubator it multiplies it gives it back to you that's why women must be careful what they listen to and who they listen to and what they hear because women incubate

everything if you give a woman a word she gives you a sentence back if you give her a sentence you get a paragraph you know speaking the truth if you give a paragraph you can get yourself a book you give a woman one sperm you want to get a sperm back she going to give it life multiply it and give you what a baby millions of sperms you give her a house no problem she'll give you a home she makes it beautiful she multiplies it gives you a beautiful home you give her groceries and a

bag she gives you a meal you give her frustration she multiplies it and gives you hell she incubates everything so if you give a woman gossip you know when the bible talks about gossip it usually refers to the female you wonder why huh and why say that a woman destroys with a mouth because a woman keeps multiplying stuff so women if you want to be a good wife make sure you receive the right stuff because whatever you receive you're going to multiply remember are you going to give it to your husband so if you're on

the phone talking all day to a woman who's divorced and you're not if you talk to women whose marriages ain't working all the time and they keep talking to you he gonna get into your womb and then your husband come back and you start speaking negative and suspicious things to your husband when in fact you were receiving that junk from your friend on the phone no wonder why peter says women be like sarah live a quiet life have a quiet spirit don't be noisy don't be gossipers why because whatever you receive you dump on your

husband watch those soap operas you're watching all the time you're an incubator you produce what you keep listening to a man is a protector a woman is an encourager this is very important the female at the beginning adam had a woman who was his helper when a man begins to share his dream with you you need to encourage him you ever heard a man talk his vision to his wife and she says that's impossible you you ain't got no education you don't have the right contacts you don't have the right associations you don't have the

right personality and by the time she's finished with him his dream is dead she's supposed to be a helper suppose encourage the man even when it seemed impossible if anyone's supposed to cheer her on it's supposed to be her most men are afraid to go home so they stop at the pub they spend hours with the brothers who encourage them to build their courage up to go home to face the one who destroys them you wonder why your husband won't come home much and he comes on after you sleeping it's safe then you're saying funny

some of you wondering sometimes you wonder why your husband like to be in church all the time church is safe some men work late because home is too dangerous no encouragement home where you been why are you late why you wear that shirt i don't like them shoes why are you here so bored what's going on with your life why are you so stupid you're just like your daddy he's just like he go and by the time the guy is finished let me get out of here so peter says go on the roof and sleep

you supposed to make your home such a comfortable place that he can't wait to get home all the men say amen sometimes the most dangerous place for a husband is his house because all he hears is negative discouragement i tell you a good woman makes a man find it hard to go to work in the morning he runs to the door runs back to her runs to the door and say honey you just make it so hard he runs to the car he drives down the street he reverses back home comes back he goes to

the workshop i'll be right back y'all goes back home that's how you got to make him make it hard for any woman to stop him on the way my wife is a dangerous woman man ladies you ain't got a chance with this handsome guy you ain't got a chance my wife drew me so good that when i see you you don't exist my home is my haven i can't wait to get home she makes the home so safe from all the pressure out there encourager woman is a receiver that means women always want what they

say she's built to receive huh now ladies listen carefully you are a receiver by design that's why god created malls shopping centers were made for women not for men now this means that a woman whatever she sees she desires so women never have enough pair of shoes anywhere in the house she sees another one she wants that she's another one she wants dresses she wants them all she drive past the house i want that baby i want a house just like that you can't afford it but she wants it now ladies this creates a problem

if you notice in the book of proverbs 31 it says something about that noble woman it says she doesn't cause her husband to go after spoil very important statement you keep missing then a good woman doesn't cause her husband to go after spoil what that means is a good woman even though she sees everything she wants she doesn't pressure her man to go get it some of you women are demanding things that are putting pressure on the family you making your husband go out and half kill himself on two jobs because you want to keep

a car that you can't pay for the pressure you put on your husband to move in an area to build a house right from zero you just got mad now you want a house that's worth 200 million pounds put pressure on the guy you want to wear the shoe that other people are wearing listen the lady wearing them shoe she being married for 20 years you just got married you can't afford those shoes don't put pressure on the man if he buys you a pair of shoes and they plastic kiss him for it thank you

baby appreciate it nothing is worse than a husband buying something for a woman and she doesn't wear it i'm giving you a hint women wear it if you don't like it pretend just wear the thing why because when you don't appreciate what your husband gives you it's an insult to his manhood oh you're quiet now mm-hmm i don't like this house this stove ain't working i don't like this shut up and enjoy it for a while tell them honey i believe god's gonna bring us up he gonna bring us out i'm with you honey we're

gonna pray together believe in god for a better flat in our own home someday yes baby keep encouraging him stop complaining don't put pressure on the man you cannot have everything you see and it's quiet let me do the last one because my time is gone i got so much more to give you everybody say prophetess let me explain this to you uh a female is an incubator that means she receives information she expands it and she gives it back to you a female never keeps anything incubators do not keep anything now they may hold

it for a while but you will eventually get it back and it'll never come back the way you gave it it comes back multiplied a woman will be under pressure for 20 years and then one day all of a sudden she goes crazy on you she cusses you and throws stuff at you picks up the refrigerator and throw at you now this incubation spirit is interesting that's why a woman is called a prophetess now when you let me let me give you a little hint in joel chapter 2 jova says in the in the last

day the holy spirit will come upon all flesh because in those days when he came upon the priests and upon the high priest and upon the prophets but he says in the last days he's going to come upon everybody but then he says it's going to affect certain people differently it comes upon the young they will see visions when it comes upon the old man they will have dreams when it comes upon the women the handmaids it says they will prophesy now why is it different you see when a man tells a woman something she

incubates it and then she gives it back to him so a woman is really a natural prophet so if you want to hear something again tell your wife if you don't want to hear it again don't tell her if you want to hear something again just tell a woman i'll give an example between brother and sister hashimoto okay watch this brother matthew tells his wife the lord told me to build a school and do all this stuff and do this and do this and do this and she goes you know praise the lord praise the

lord amen good honey praise the lord and she tells him he does all this stuff and she say praise the lord fine ten months later he's discouraged he said this ain't working the people ain't cooperating can't get the property i'm gonna quit and she says quit what and then she says you told me that god told you and then she lets him have it now in while she's giving it back to him he he cries out shut up stop irritating me that ain't irritation brother that's prophecy she prophesying back to you say woman stop irritating

me that invitation she giving you back what you gave her but now it's coming multiplied she began to add stuff to it you told me that god told you on september 9th at 2 am and she knows the details am i right about it brother now men when the woman starts doing that that's not irritation that's prophecy you tell your wife from now on you know i've been to the conference and gathering a champion and i heard brother miles say get my house in order honey from now on we're gonna have devotions every morning she

said yes praise it she's so happy yo praise the lord thank god for brother miles hallelujah finally got devotions in the house yes we're gonna have devotion six o'clock every morning get the kids together we're gonna pray before we go to work in school so you please get everybody yes man are you happy so the first week you do fine second week you're okay third week you didn't get up and she comes sweetheart and you go sweetheart sweetheart what do you want woman it's time for devotions what devotions now she says didn't you tell me

that god told you that ain't nagging that's prophecy she's giving you back your own prophecy you told her you're going to get up for devotions now the prophecy is coming back out of the prophet is saying get up let's have devotions don't get mad at her get mad at your own inconsistency now ladies don't bring prophecies that he didn't give you that's irritation so if you want to be blessed as a woman be a helper a helper is a person who always is there to assist i want to close on something that i hope you

will get this oh that's too much information you can't take that okay i won't bother with that someday we'll come back and brother matt and i will do a week of conferences for family how about that brother man we're gonna work on this now i want you to stand there for a minute i need i need another male and female please can i have you too please i want you to stand on this third step can you take your pen and write this down please write this down i'm going to give you the the needs

of a man a woman okay now i need are there little any little kids in here young kids can you come here baby come here i need another little kid oh she's so pretty oh man oh what's your name marianne marianne stand up the steps right next to that pretty girl right there right next to you stand up better handsome guy on this side all right standing by him now come over right on top of the step there i'll go back right good i want you all to see something here okay now what i need

is i need about five men to come and stand and i need five women to come can i just quickly i wanna show you a picture five men five women okay you stand here and then off the steps stand up here one two okay stand next to him on the steps okay women can you come stand up here i need two women on the steps i want you to see a picture you stand right next to her stand right next to her all right now i want you all to remember what you see okay the

number one need of a male write this down is sex write it down you need to know that the number one need of a male is sex i didn't say the number one mean need of a man because a man is spirit a man needs god but the number one need of a male is sex why because the male is designed by god to be a pro generator that means a male is always full of seed his purpose in life is to provide seed that's why every male right now is carrying half a billion sperms

in his loins right now he's a seed carrier so his number one purpose in life is to provide the genes or the generations or the generations the genes for the generations so male is designed by god to produce generations that's why when god wanted created nation he never went to woman he went to a man because a man carries the generations he said abraham a nation should come from you and several incubate the nation so the man needs sex the man doesn't want sex he needs sex say he needs it men don't want sex they

need sex a need is something that helps you function a car doesn't want gasoline to need gasoline if you don't have gas in the car it stops functioning a need is not a want men do not want sex they need sex don't look at me so funny lady say hallelujah anyhow i'm trying to give you some education so you don't get in trouble now because a man number one need is sex because he's driven by the divine purpose to produce seed that's why men have no cycles a man have no menstruation cycle he's always ready

all the time every day all day anytime anywhere the guy's ready all the men say right on don't look so quiet on me now come on brothers help me out you help me out here now so you see uh a man ain't got to build up the sex he's just ready and he ain't got no cycle so he's ready even when you are not ready creates a problem now most women who are married especially you christian women some of you all think that your husband got a demon what's wrong with you man you had it

last night this morning again what's wrong with you and yesterday you had a day before you're sick man i'm gonna pray for you i'm going to take you to pastor matthew and cast out this nymphomaniac demon you are full of the devil and so you take your husband down to the to the office you make an appointment to see brother matthew i said pastor my husband have a demon he's a nymphomaniac he won't leave his hands of me you got to pray for him cast the demon out and brother matthew says i got the same

demon can i hear an amen brothers come on brother matthew help me out here amen brother that ain't no demon all the men say amen all the men say leave the demon alone your husband is not sick he's normal and if anybody here want to be too spiritual any brother gonna be spiritual if you don't have the same desire you need prayer now the question is why is a woman's need not sex a woman's number one need is not sex now she she likes sex sex is good for a woman and she enjoys it but

it's not her motivational deed a woman's number one need is not sex write it down her number one need is affection affection is not sex brothers as a matter of fact sex is the result of affection to a woman if you give affection you'll get your need man now some of you ladies need some help you go to bed in the night you got on all this clothes socks long mitten dress time on your head you got wrapped up all around your body the guy got to fight to find something i mean you got to

stop this all the men are shouting now boy ladies you want to be a good wife make it easy go with nothing on say good night baby come on to bed i'm talking to wise now if you ain't married this ain't for you some men feel like they are raping their wives ladies you ever wonder why paul says your body is not your own because sometimes you don't feel like it the problem is he always feels like it now women have four seasons summer winter autumn and spring so men you got to be sensitive when

it's winter leave her alone buy her flowers kiss her hug her but don't touch her that's winter you own the cold brother control yourself right mama you acting so spiritual now you know it's true when it's winter time baby you don't want nobody to touch you right now it's winter then there's autumn autumn means that things begin to change begin to warm up a little bit but you still ain't interested right now then spring comes spring means everything's coming back to life baby let's get it on here then summer comes who is so hot she

grabs you in the bed come on here and then there's winter again you out in the cold again so men we got to be sensitive even though you're ready all the time she ain't a good marriage is built on a man who understands sensitivity and a woman who understands the need of a man i'm gonna tell you something ladies a man doesn't want sex i like what paul says paul says don't you be spiritual now ladies talking about going on missions i'm going to fast and pray for three weeks i'm gonna just what the bible

says don't you go and fast and pray unless you first ask not god but your husband so you can't tell your husband the lord told me to you gotta tell god your husband told you you could that would the scriptures teach and then the bible says and after you finish fasting after he allows you to go and fast and pray it says hurry back to the bed why because sister mabel in the church will provide what he needs if you don't don't look at me funny while you all have admission someone on a mission with

your husband because he doesn't want it he needs it oh i got four more to give you but the time's gone okay let me just close by saying this ladies and gentlemen marriage is a honorable thing but the bed is undefiled you keep it pure by understanding the needs and what you see in the front here is the beauty of god's creation notice who's on top who's on top god everything came from god who's the first one that he made the male out of the male came what the female and out of that came what

the marriage and the marriage produced what a family and they finally produced one a community a community is a multiplication of families what is a nation a multiplication of communities so all of us are the nation that there is a community and that is the family and that is the marriage and that is the female and that is the male and that is god now whenever there's a problem in the nation here's how you solve it whenever there's a problem in the nation if it's aids if it's promiscuity if it's divorce or whatever you've got

to go backward to find the problem so you start going back to the to denominate the problem you if the nation has a problem you go check the community see what's wrong well the communities are made up of what families so you go back and you check the family and you check the family something's wrong with the family you find out why something must be wrong with the marriage you check the marriage something's wrong the marriage then something must be wrong with the woman well why something wrong with the woman because something must be wrong

with the man and then the man got to go to who we got to go to god and when you go to god and god says let's reverse it let's find out who the problem is and he begins with who the man he will come and return the hearts of the fathers back to the children a woman is as good as the men make them and the marriages are as good as the male and female singles that are in it marriage is like an omelet it's only as good as the eggs if you got a

rotten egg and a good egg no matter how good the good egg is the omelet is going to be rotten so before you yoke up with somebody check and see if there's any cracks in their character make sure that they are not defective because you're going to marry the defect and your relationship will become a defective one christ said it well divorce is not your problem he says check back and see what the family is like if the family ain't working see what the marriage is like the marriage ain't working check and see what the

singles are like and if the singles are contaminated the marriage is naturally contaminated and therefore check the male and female first before you begin to blame god because the ingredients determine what kind of cake you have if you're gonna have a good family you're gonna need to check the quality of the people that make up the marriage singleness is more important than marriage because your marriage is only as good as your singleness and if you want your marriage to improve don't ask your mate to improve you improve and it will automatically improve because you are

your marriage if you are unmarried today it's more important for you to be single than to be married and make sure that before you give yourself to somebody that you have checked and studied them and explored them and you understand that you are getting someone that is going to be as close as possible to the beginning man and woman you want a woman who can be a helper one who can incubate your dream one who can can help encourage you to pursue god's will for your life you want a woman who will be the the

kind of stamina that can be there won't criticize you for to be a healing bomb in your times of stress you want a woman who will not become your number one critic but your number one protection you want a woman who will be there to make it feel good to come home ladies build your house up with your hands and protect it with your mouth and don't keep company with people who are failing because you'll incubate their failure and bring it to your own house i want you to know this is god's will right here

he's the foundation of the family and he's put the male as the responsible head now when the nation falls apart you gotta go and check the mail i hope that this conference have made you aware that the key to healing london is in the man sitting next to you may you buy these tapes listen to them a thousand times and let the principles preserve your life and if you do i know that i will see you at the top god bless you thank you very much thank you adam come on give the lord a big

hand for the day hallelujah everybody stand up for a minute i want to pray a wonderful blessing on the women today all the men say please lord bless the women you know women you've had a rough life please remain in position we're going to leave in a moment but i thank god for your patience with us most men are ignorant i'm still learning i tell you it's amazing how much we don't know but we've not done a good job in modeling before you as a man you've had to struggle some of you bring up your

families by yourselves ladies it's tough because the fathers have abandoned their homes but i also want to say that some of you didn't know what to do either and you ran the farther away and there's a responsibility on both of our parts i want to encourage you i was flicking through one of pastor matthews books the one on single 700 and something i think 707 ways for singles i was flipping through the book and i said my goodness i hope everybody get a copy of this book this is a good book for women and men

to read the more you know the less mistakes you make and marriage is not a mystery it's very predictable you can decide to have a successful marriage men if you don't have a vision for your life i want to encourage you to pick up a copy of the book entitled in pursuit of purpose there's a black book in the back there on the table read that book and then craft a vision for your life for the next 30 40 years if you are married get the book and read it right away if you are not

married get two copies give one to the person who you may be interested in both of you understand what purpose and vision is get it in your life because if you don't have a vision for your life as a male you're going to frustrate a woman she's a helping machine and she can't come to help you do nothing and secondly women i want to encourage you to to learn men study men talk to men about what they want what they desire let a man educate you and then men talk to women women are a walking

library they know about themselves let them teach you what a woman really needs someday i'll come back and deal with the other four needs of the male and female very important stuff because marriage is about meeting needs it's not really about getting your needs meant it's about meeting the other person's needs but you cannot meet a need that you don't know and one of the most difficult things in relationship is this we think that the other sex needs what we need and it's completely wrong men need sex but women don't need sex they need affection

so when a man has sex with a woman and he's climaxed and he's happy he thinks she's happy no she's not because your need was meant but hers wasn't because hers was not sex so even if you are getting your needs met it doesn't mean that the other person needs it being men you got to know what those needs are and that's why paul says and peter reiterates peter says husband live with your wives according to what knowledge get to know women my prayer is that this week has not only challenged you to live by

faith but to live by revelation in your home on sunday evening i'm going to be delivering one of the most important climaxes that i'm going to give in any conference i'm going to talk about bringing all this together to make your life take charge of all of your circumstances we're going to talk about that on sunday we're going to talk about the most important message that i've ever taught in the world today you've received haven't you you got blessed and i want to say that your host and his wife have put out a lot of

energy and a lot of resources to make this conference possible to bring ron canole and to bring brother eddie long here and all the others who mike murdoch and others have come and fed you and i know what it is as a senior pastor to host a conference that's worldwide i've done it for the last 20 years and and it's a very fate challenging thing because you've got to believe god at the end of it that everything is covered and sometimes when you come to a situation like this uh you don't not aware of with

the weight that's on the the leaders there's a weight of responsibility so let me stress this before we conclude i am invited by people to do conferences and to do sessions on many different subjects and in the world when i'm invited to do a conference or a seminar for a corporate company like xerox or or like a telecommunications company do a training seminar for them do you know what they do they do something strange they always ask me for my fees so my secretary sends them a contract and they sign it that's the world that's

what i deal with the world corporate companies and i get paid seven to eight thousand dollars for a two-hour conference and that's what i'm worth to the world my basic daily worth in a conference for an hour is five thousand us dollars an hour and that's what they pay me in the world they pay without even thinking about it so if i do five hours for them it's twenty five thousand dollars for five hours and they don't even think about it just write a check let me sign a contract i go and train their people

and then they invite me back the next year never ever in my life have i ever asked the church for anything i deal with the world differently because they understand the value of the gift the bible says the children of this world are wiser than the children of light the next statement says therefore go to the world and learn from them and sometimes i know brother matthew may feel the pressure sometimes you know you come here to every meeting and he takes an offering and your first thought is boy they keep taking off and that

was taking an offering do you numbers they pay to come into a conference that we do in the corporate world one person pays five hundred dollars before they even come in they get to pay it five hundred dollars up front that's the average cost of a seminar of a motivational trainer like me it's five hundred dollars now i'm a pastor of a church and an i pastor one of the great churches in the bahamas they say is wonderful but when i deal with the world their concept of value is different and so we don't bother

to to charge churches anything because we are part of you we we we are one with you but i want you to know that that's why the world keeps prospering and many times that's why the believer the churn of light have difficulty prospering because they don't understand the value of the gift and so the bible says very clearly do not muff muzzle the ox that trades out the grain in other words the person who's doing all the work who's serving you all the good food he says don't muffle them don't don't don't suffocate them and

then kill them because you want him to come back and keep giving you food and today brother matthew wrote a little note in my schedule he says can you receive the offering for the day session and i was thinking yeah but i don't want an offering today what i want is heart i just want your heart if you believe in what this conference has been doing and i want something more important than an offering i want your heart if your heart is in something then the bible says wherever your heart is okay so you can

tell if your heart is in it your treasure follows so really i want something more important than money because money money is easy to come by it's hearts that the body of christ needs to capture and it took place the most important part of a meeting is this moment right now i didn't think so as a pastor until years ago when the lord showed me that when christ came to visit the synagogue there's a place he always sat look at me please look at me i want to show you this he always sat at a

certain spot the bible says he sat right next to the box where the treasurer was put in again the money that was his favorite spot he sat by the door at the treasury and he says he watched how the people put their monies in why he wasn't concerned about the preacher or the choir or even the worshipping he's concerned about what were they doing at the box because where your treasure is and some folks shout and scream and laugh and praise the lord and hallelujah and then when the bucket pass they don't put nothing in

and christ says look it's where your treasure goes that proves where your heart is so he sat at the most important seat in the meeting he sat by the treasury because that's where he got observed where people's heart truly was this moment i want you to show pastor matthew that you really believe in this conference and that this conversation should not only be paid for because i know this costs over 100 000 or more pounds but i think this conference should be back again next year don't you think so it gets bigger and better so

i want to encourage you to sit down for a moment and get some heart in your hand and everybody could bring their heart i want you to get some heart in your hand pastors deacons elders business people everybody if you leave without giving you have robbed the muzzling of the ox because you've eaten at a restaurant basically and not paid and that's called stealing the bible says never come before the lord empty-handed and that's why because you don't come and receive without giving back because that's what keeps meat in the house so everybody get an

offering in your hand and give it as a heart this is my my heart is in this conference lord and i'm going to prove it lord and the lord is watching this part of the service more than when you were shouting hallelujah amen to a statement i made because this is the proof of where your heart is let the lord see your heart write a big check and say god this is from my business this is from my church this is from my company this is from the bonus this is from my my investment that

i gained this month i'm gonna give from my bounty that you blessed me with i believe in what's happening at this conference i am gonna give and everybody should give if you don't have anything to give ask your neighbor because it's unfair for someone else to carry your load we sharing this together so that we can continue the work that has started here in the gathering of champions conferences this conference is becoming a major meeting in all of europe and you are part of making that happen and as we go on radio and television and

expand through satellite and and all through the works of the internet it's going to be a massive explosion if you keep meat in this house so that there'll always be meat in the house we give to preserve i'm going to wait until you're finished i want to pray a blessing over your gift and then i want to bless the women and i'm going to turn this bike over to our host write your checks payable to kicc and write a check that represents your heart sometimes we so used to giving 20 pounds it's almost like a

like a bad habit like drugs you just give with i want you to break that barrier the international gathering of champion has been brought to you courtesy of kicc and its host pastor matthew ashimolowo other igoc tapes videos and a list of other products by pastor matthew please call 020-85250 or write to us at kicc 57 waterden road hackney london e15 2 ee our email address is admin kic