I Confessed My Affair To My Wife, Her Response Shocked Me...(Testimony)

[Music] I didn't grow up in church like a lot of Believers uh typically do I don't have a traditional Church background my background I was born and raised in Memphis Tennessee um I grew up uh with two extremes the first extreme was I was with my biological father for the first five years of my life and that was was a lot that's where a lot of trauma set in that's where a lot of um a lot of what I've become today set in because of the things I went through by being under his um under

his parenting uh for those first five years I would say a lot of abuse happened to me a lot of um just neglect a lot of exposure to things that I shouldn't have seen in that age and it all began with me just not uh I believe God made me this way first off but it all began with me not being afraid to to just tell the truth or how I felt now with this man my bi biological father he was a pimp he was a street guy and he did a lot of if you

guys know know what that term mean in Memphis it's called Uh the term is making Easy Money pimping in style and that was really what I was around he had me around in in rooms where he would be with women and I would have to sit there while he's in a separate room and I'm sitting there playing with whatever children around this was things that I got to see as a kid he would take me to different places where a lot of gambling drinking like I was just exposed to these these different uh things where

I where it became normalized to me but when we would get back home my sister she's a little older than me most of the time I would just get beat to get beat uh most of the beatings happen where he would hang me upside down uh that's where a lot of trauma took place where he would hang me upside down or he would put my head between his legs and most of the time these beatings would happen and I would stay mute uh he would lock me in a room that wasn't no bigger than almost

like a like a narrow Pantry like a long Pantry with those like uh folded doors and my sister would sneak me food just because he wouldn't let me out she'll sneak me any type of snacks if she got caught then she'll get beat but it was never as Extreme as what happened to me my first encounter with the Lord happened after one of the major like beatings he gave me um it was one night I had already gone to bed uh at this time my stepmother had put me to bed he just came home and

I don't we don't really know what was going on with him but he began to beat me out of my sleep with the belt buckle and of the belt and I had scratches and like a hole in the back of my ear and the pillowcase was pretty bloody and um that night after he beat me that bad I remember laying in the bed in this house it there was a long hallway and the way my bed was positioned I could see out the door as I'm laying there I'm s in I'm crying from being beat

the the brightest light came like into my room I've never seen anything as bright as this in my life it was so bright it came in and I couldn't I could hardly couldn't hardly look at it and I tried to say Mom I tried to yell for my mom and I got Mom out but I went silent and whatever this entity was which I know now to be the Holy Spirit it pretty much calm me down covered me healed me overnight and I remember waking up the scratches and the hole that was behind my ear

was closed now I guess I could say to his credit that morning it was the same old thing he came and apologized to me but I never forgot that moment where that light had touched me and healed me I didn't know how to speak about it I'm four or five years old at this time life kept going on as usual but I kept that in my in my spirit in my mind as a kid I couldn't communicate what that was but I was very like um like unaware of it because again I didn't grow up

in church no one was I didn't have parents that were speaking a word over me talking about Jesus to me uh sharing the gospel helping me understand the gospel so of course me thinking about that was I almost in my imagination I tried to blow it off as nothing and and Adrian where was your mother my mother um my mom at the time so my dad uh getting back to him he tricked my mother into signing us away when he tricked her into signing paperwork to give him custody of us for those first few years

it sent my mom down a down a bad path where she kind of spiraled and moved to Chicago and I I don't know the full context of what my mom went through at that time uh my auntie my sister my older sister they know a little bit more but my mom struggled with some things my dad had introduced her to drugs and uh and I think she just was in a bad place for a couple of years once she got clean and she was coming back to get custody of us I knew things had got

a lot shaky um I remember the night it was a week where we went to court we went to court uh because the custody battle had started and I remember the judge took us to the the back to ask me and my sister who we wanted to stay with and we both said my mom afterwards we go back home with my dad and he's in the driveway he's asking us like one onone he's pulling my sister to a side and put pulling me to the side and he says um so who you want to who

do you want to stay with and my sister she's so smart even at that age she's a few years older than me she said I want to stay with you daddy she comes back to me she says hey JR just tell him you want to stay with him so nothing happens to you I said no I want to stay with Mom I want to stay with Mommy and she was like J please you know what he's going to do I said no I said I can't no and I'm young you know I'm I'm a kid

I'm 5 years old he pulls me behind the car asked me the same question I said I want to stay with Mommy and he looked at me with like the most disgusting like demonic look and just like disgusted by me and he said all right everybody let's go in the house we start going into the house he pushes me back out no you stay outside and I remember that night sitting outside I don't know how long I sat out there I just remember I remember sitting on the curve just hoping my mom would come I

was hoping she would come over the hill um that night she never came and then I had to go back in the house and I had to to go and lock myself in that room again probably a month or two after that was when the police kicked the door in and they were like taking us from him I remember it was Christmas Eve it was raining that night and I remember it kicked it in Everybody Get Down everybody get down and they grabbed us and they they took us out and um yeah I remember Christmas

Eve I forget the year but that was when we finally came under my M my mother's uh care and and things like I said it went from one extreme to the next I went from being pretty much just beaten and abused to having all of this freedom and exposure I didn't know what to do with it we went right into living with my grandmother at the time and living with my grandma this was on uh 328 e Shelby Drive in Memphis and it was a three-bedroom house a lot of my cousins and aunties everybody lived

there that was my first time hearing about Jesus my grandmother whether she would be cooking or doing anything in the house it seemed like she was always praying or or saying something carrying a spoon or doing something but she kept talking about Jesus I didn't know who she was talking about and I just asked a question I was more Curious than a lot of my cousins like Grandma who is Jesus and she just like baby like you you going to find out he's he's our covering he's our savior you know he protects us he provides

for us and I'm just like looking I'm like who where is this guy and and I'm thinking as a child I always had such a heightened imagination and then I go right back to the light and I'm saying like was that Jesus that saved me that night but I again I haven't told anybody I'm like 5 6 years old still again it's the first time I hear about Jesus we didn't we started going to church once I started Living With Grandma but we only went in Pockets you know like CEOs Christmas Easter only so we

went in Pockets like that but we weren't consistently in church um I still wasn't really being taught the word I still wasn't being um educated on the gospel understanding the gospel and that was just my life for a while in and out in and out as a kid if my mom was having a good day if she had a good day at the casino then we going to church if she's not having a good day we were're not going to church but the environment we lived in was very uh wide open I grew up in

the after we moved from my grandma we only stayed there probably a couple of years until we moved into these projects uh not too long no well around the corner like on Elvis Presley and Winchester and that's where I I probably I saw my first person get shot I was in the middle of my first like gang war like in the middle of the street where like the fight literally broke out with with two games where my sister had to come grab me watching guys get their head bust open one guy getting his face beat

with a brick a pole another one and I didn't really talk a lot because this was normal I thought all of this was normal it was then where me and my sister we got very close but things started happening with us not having any type of Parental Guidance like everything was like wide open I got my first tattoo when I was nine you know my sister got hers and we just we just didn't know you know she started smoking at 11 um people were having sex at 1213 I saw a 12-year-old get pregnant it was

just it was just things that we just we just thought was normal in our in our community in our hood and I remember one day I found my sister cuz she had went from being my protector to kind of trying to manage everything as a kid herself she was trying to manage everything uh with my cousins my mom would be out working and my and the person that was supposed to be there to to like look out for us was never there so my sister had to cook my sister had to do this and I

had to watch her do a lot of things and I remember one day she tried to kill herself she she was um 11 years old I think at the time she had overdosed on the bed and I found her I found my sister uh with pills and and all I knew to do was just call the police and um I remember watching her just laying on the bed and again I don't know what to say but Jesus because this is who my grandmother always talks about who saves us so all I'm saying is Jesus I

don't know how to pray I don't know what else to say that comes after that so I just started saying Jesus over my sister and um you know and they came they pumped her of course she's alive she turned 40 years old like two days ago and it's it's wow for us we we never we didn't think that we would even get past 20 but she's 40 years old um and yeah and and and Trauma it it was like it was a reversal happened my trauma was happening a lot through my dad and my sister

was trauma trauma was happening through circumstances and I remember one of the one of the worst times for us was when um my mother came home we don't know exactly what happened but somebody triggered her into saying that we were having some type of party and she kicks in the door in the door my sister's on the sale on her on the house phone um and I'm playing Sega my mom has like a 2x4 swings the 2x4 fractures my sister's arm comes around the couch hits me in my rib and goes for another swing and

I grab it and I take it and I remember when I snatched it from my mom she looks at me with this like she couldn't believe what she did and she just beines at the house and I'm over again and I'm grabbing my sister holding my sister and we're both crying and again all I could think about Jesus um and as a child as a child growing up in those projects I was very different um I got picked on a lot because of you know the things I just wanted to play football I didn't want

to be in the game I didn't want to like smoke weed I didn't want to do any of that stuff I just wanted to play football and look at the sky anytime I had to go outside and just lay down and look at the sky that's what I did I still do that to this day I'm always looking up and just realizing just how not just the sky now but how big God is and and I always had that in me from a child uh I'm always looking up and and the word tells us to

look up and to think how Heaven thinks and so I feel like the Lord was always he always had me on that that fish hook if we're fisherman of men he's the fisherman and so that's how I feel like he's been in my life even from a even from my childhood but things didn't stop things didn't stop you know like we we like I said I was exposed to so much and and one thing that that happened that stuck with me I know that stuck with me that that later came out you know as I

got older was one of my mother's friends she I remember her coming to the house and I was grabbing my football to go outside and she grabs me and she throws me to the ground and this is a grown lady you know I don't know roughly late 20s early 30s and she's like you know you a handsome boy and I was like yes ma'am like I don't know what to say and she gets on top of me like in a sexual position and they're laughing they're thinking that this is funny and she's doing things like

just like you when you get older this what you know just saying things to me in a sexualized way but I'm like8 years old I have no idea what she's talking about again I'm So Young I'm so naive I have no idea this is what she's doing and I'm just trying to go play football and she's thrusting on me and doing these things and she lets me up because my mom comes out of the kitchen so my mom didn't even see that happen she thinks that the lady's just talking about how handsome I am as

a little boy and what I could be when I get older and my mom you know I don't think this was um her intentions to to do this I think they were just thinking they were joking around my mom comes and say so let me know when you ready to buy some condoms and again I don't even know what condoms are at this this time so I go outside and all I'm thinking about while I'm running to go to the field or play football with my friends it's like like what is this like what just

happened and little moments like that with her with her friend um happened to me a lot you know uh anytime I was they would ask me to go grab something from her house I'll be I would be hesitant uh because um I'm just like man I don't feel like her like flirting with me or doing this stuff I just don't you know I'm I'm a kid I don't feel like being touched and anytime anytime she will always come here give me a hug or just do extra stuff extra little rubs extra little touches here nothing

uh no intercourse no things like that but it was just super uncomfortable but what was being planted in me was that this is what boys supposed to do with women you know this is how you should be this is what girls want I grew up from that point on we moved to another other part of the city we moved to North Memphis uh where I started playing football I got pretty good at football I started playing football at 13 varsity football at 13 so I had older friends in high school while I was still in

middle school and a lot of my friends uh they had already done things you know and and I was super green uh in the culture I was late I was a late bloomer when it came to sexual things and they knew that my friends never like made fun of me for it they just knew that I wasn't as um what you say conspicuous I don't know if that's the right word but I wasn't as conspicuous as them I was very um just quiet about it because I was uh naive and and shy later as I

got older um it wasn't until maybe my junior year or senior year high school was when I first uh did something you know sexually with the young lady and I remember being excited to tell somebody because that's what I was programmed to think you know from a kid a 8-year-old kid that this is what I'm supposed to do and it was kind of just blown off it was kind of just blown off like oh about time that's what you're supposed to be doing you know like boom boom boom and I'm just like and I don't

I don't I didn't know why but my sister was very protective of me in that area she was very protective for me when it came to women but I thought I was doing the right thing based off what was happening what had happened to me and what was told that I had to be what I had to do this is what you're supposed to do when you get older and um that actually stayed with me you know I never wanted to disappoint my sister so I never became a like u a monogamous Guy where I

had multiple women but I did become a Serial monogamous where I would mess around with one girl at a time but I never like did things um and I I was that guy that if I did something this is the type of relationship I have with God if I do something I know I'm not supposed to do Lord please please don't let this happen please God forgive me I'm not going to do it again I was that type of believer where I'm only checking in with him so that I can not get the results of

my sin if I escape it then I take it as God being okay with me sinning which is a ignorant perspective to have as a Believer and that's when I knew that I had the wrong ideology of the whole thing I had the wrong ideology of Christ the wrong ideology of the gospel because of the way that I checked in with God the way that I use God in my secular life was only to make sure that I don't end up with a disease or dead or broke by the sin that I'm committing and that's

what I believe because of what I was around that's the way I saw people's relationship with God so I figured like that's all I have to do he's a genie I just check in with him make a wish you know and be done with it fast forward guys it wasn't honestly until my salvation didn't really hit uh come to terms until until 2008 when I met my now wife uh we met but there was not a immediately um like like towards each other she didn't like me right away and I didn't really like her she

had a sort of a smart mouth she's Puerto Rican it was like a disconnect culture-wise but that kind of went away very quickly uh I knew that she was different and it was somebody that I wanted to pursue so after I was done with school at University of Tennessee at Martin in 2011 I decided to move to Arizona and I moved to Arizona to be with to be with Erica and um yeah she was a Church Girl complete opposite of me she grew up in church she had a dance ministry she was teaching girls dance

ministry she went to a Hispanic church so I didn't know anything that was going on I just wanted to be there to support her very vague very vague Christian questions I had the little Christian needes do you believe go yeah yeah I believe it's a god like you know I say little things like that and I didn't know that there were just me being around even though I didn't understand things and and later things became very toxic in that environment I didn't know the seeds had already been planted seeds that were planted by my grandmother

seeds that were planted by my own mom seeds that were planted by my sister and now ER my now wife um a lot of my my promoted sin or like my my public sin that I was doing uh back at school and high school a lot of that sin came to a head in my marriage because of what I deemed that well this is what I'm supposed to do I'm supposed to be having sex I'm supposed to be uh doing this with women this is this is what I'm used to so why isn't this happening

and when that when we had that type of like um friction in our marriage on the those first few years I ended up stepping out on my wife I was never known to be a cheater in my secular life I was never known for for sleeping around with multiple girls that was never me and for me to come way out to the West Coast to meet somebody and to do what I did to her the in the most disrespectful embarrassing way only the Holy Spirit can do what he did in our life because back in

2016 October 8 was the day I confessed my infidelity to my wife and that was the day that the holy spirit intervened in our marriage and I remember the day I remember the day where I I I knew that morning I woke up I was going to tell her um what had happened uh because I had ended things and but it was still still hunting me um and I remember I told her she had she broke woke up very happy very bright and then you could see her just turn Super pale and um I remember

that like as if it happened yesterday and she couldn't say anything she knew exactly who the person was and I remember her leaving and she left I had had my bags packed ready to go back to Memphis and I was getting ready to get in my car I had grabbed like a fifth of Hennessy and I remember getting a a text in my phone uh from my wife she text me and the text measure said hey don't do anything stupid don't leave and I had just like I had just told her what I had been

doing to her like those first years like hours before and this and this the first thing she could think about was me only God only the Holy Spirit could do something like that because for me to see how she looked when I told her this news she it completely changed her she was no longer there so for for that to be the text message she say and she would even say this like I don't even know how I would say that and in that moment that was the moment where I dropped my phone and I

just cried out to God just I remember I had the Hennessy right there that I was about to drink and just um and just drive you know however far I was going to drive to go back home and I just broke down and it felt like God had just pushed me like from the top of my head to the ground and I remember just crying out to God like I don't know how to do this I don't I don't know you I thought I did how do I do this like I don't want to be

this way anymore and that that was when it clicked I remember that's when it clicked my wife chose not to leave me we just celebrated 10 years like literally this month September we celebrated 10 years of marriage we should have been done after two and Only God Can intervene in things like this only the Holy Spirit if you are his and if you allow him to work in you he would do the impossible with an impossible situation and from that moment I remember telling my wife how do I do this like how do I she

she didn't understand I said I want to I want to know God I want to go to church and she looked at me like with the okay well let's start looking for churches at this time you had mentioned that she was in in in Ministry before you guys got married dance ministry um but at this time you guys were basically away from the church or what what was that Dynamic with the church and you guys so that church was where the infidelity happened I knew I couldn't go back there I was done with it and

she knew that she couldn't go back there because of how nasty it got with those pastors those pastors wanted to hide the sin where I exposed it and they wanted to keep it quiet because it it interfered with their congregation and their family um there was was an individual that she was friends with their daughter that this affair happened with and it kind of flipped and they tried to blame my wife for the whole thing it got really bad for for a little for a little while there and I knew in that time where it

was bad I was kind of sinking in myself because I didn't know how to to go about wanting to know God I didn't know how to go about looking for a church or what does a actual church building a congregation looks like what does proper biblical sound Doctrine look like I didn't didn't know and coincidentally neither did my wife and so once we did once she did take it serious when she was ready to leave and for me us to start looking for churches we went and looked for churches in the area and I remember

every time we would leave she would ask me what do you think and like I don't know it's it sound cool you know he sound like he they know what they talking about I don't know what I'm looking for it wasn't until we got invited to a church that wasn't on the list of churches we ended up going to this church uh name Without Walls Church in mace Arizona and the pastor Pastor Ken uh we sat in the back Pastor Kim was preaching a message when I tell you this this guy he was just I

I don't remember the text he was coming from but I hadn't seen anybody just preach from the text and the way that he was breaking it down it felt like I was being punched right in my gut and I'm sitting there and I'm getting uncomfortable you know when when I reading your mail you just sitting there you try to act like you're okay and you swarming in your seat you're looking over seeing if anybody's feeling this and it felt like he was talking to me and we left and I come back I said hey we

need to go back one more time I just want to make sure and I'll be be honest with you guys he bust me up again bust me up again and and and we served at that church for from 2017 to 2024 this year and that is our family like I love them I gave my life to Christ June 20 June 25th 2017 I got baptized from that moment on I just been serving God I got I've been discipled I've I've been studied like I've I can't even believe the things that I'm doing for God like

it blows my mind as well as my family even my wife gets emotional when she sees me doing things for God because she knows what I used to be and to see what God did with our marriage and what he's Contin continuing to do with our marriage like we're even going to a new level in our marriage now it's just been powerful and it's been so reassuring that that uh when we abide in him and he abides in us we truly can ask what we want and it will be done as his word says and

I just can't believe some of the things that we were able to accomplish to people that he was a we were able to serve and how he used Us in these past years um just my wife being able to have children uh that in itself was was traumatizing for us um during the years of the infidelity she couldn't get pregnant it hurts it hurt us but I'm so grateful that God didn't allow it to happen uh in that toxic marriage that we had in the beginning um but now we have three Miracles like all three

of our boys are Miracles and and we're grateful for that and um Adrian can sorry can you no no no no need to apologize could you talk to us a little bit about that process of restoration you know you mentioned when when you told your wife uh that you had committed adultery that you had cheated on her yeah um you know it's kind of like a double punch because one there's the infidelity and then two there's the infidelity within the church yes which is supposed to be for for a lot of people in a safe

place right where bad things don't happen right yeah for sure reality is that you know everybody is is going through different things so what what was that process like for you and finding this community yeah what did God begin to do there yeah so the the first thing for me when we were my restoration process when we were coming out of the infidelity and pursuing the church one of the one things we had to do was we had to get Christian Counseling but I had to do my own personal counseling I wanted to also do

the marriage and also deal with myself and I think in that process of doing some some self-healing and and seeking counseling for mental health and this was way before mental health became like a commercial thing I truly decided to do the work and I believe in the restoration of God revealing things that made me have to go back to my childhood made me have to go back to things that I had to renounce uh things that I had to strongholds that I had to have broken off from me um a lot of of it was

so deep in me that I had planted it in my mind to like uh forget like suppress things and in this at the same time my wife was also you know going through her going through her own restoration process because again she grew up in church her whole life but she had never experienced what she experienced you know and she didn't know that she wasn't receiving the true gospel she didn't know that she wasn't um being uh a part of a a real true church uh body um Christian Church that that had the Christian morals

that believed in the Bible only if it didn't affect them you know she had her own ideology was was turned upside down as well so we did had to do a complete complete restoration of uh not only our faith but our marriage um our physical health our community of relationships with friends friendships like everything God cleaned the Slate on everything because he truly made everything brand new and it took us getting our Christian counselor me doing my counseling and we had to stop looking at it as even though we did the work in regards to

you know the infidelity we continued to do it because we look at counseling as maintenance it's not necessarily you have to do it before when something bad happens we do it to check in now because different seasons happen and through the restoration of of going through counseling us deciding to do the work that's where the Lord kind of honored us he honored Me by uh constantly coming clean I had to go and confess things to to people I hurt like my mother-in-law my my sister-in-law that's like a real sister to me my actual sister I

had to tell her these things were hard you know to to come clean about my sin but that's what we're supposed to to do we're supposed to expose the sin we're supposed to um whatever the results of my sin is going to be I can't be afraid of my sin or the results of my sin and try to um try to skip the process I can't skip over uh the sanctification process what God is trying to do in my life people just want to get to the end of the road but if I was doing

these things and in silence and in the dark I can't be afraid to come to the light in any in any area of my life and especially when it comes to the sin and so that's pretty much what took place it was a lot of Tears a lot of crying a lot of hard things to admit because I don't know if there's anybody that's watching this or listening that has had infidelity in their marriage from a male perspective that's did this to his wife you have no say so over what she wants to ask if

she needs things needs you to share things for her peace that she needs to know as much as you want to move on you have to give her what she needs and that's what was hard for me it was hard because those early like probably that first i' say eight months I couldn't even talk to my wife I had to write letters like she didn't want to hear my voice I had to write letters to her and put them under the bathroom door or we just avoided each other and it was a it was it

was not a quick a quick turnaround just because she decided to stay with me don't mean that it was all good right away um it says as a s said when it rains you have to deal with the mud too and I believe that that's what we had to walk through we were persevering we um we did something that not a lot of people know about we did a marriage intensive uh this thing uh had a I'm not sure if you heard the term Soo so it's a deliverance and we did a marriage intensive weekend

with Bob and Audrey Meisner and this was probably the the most life-changing thing for us and this was in 2021 when we did this that weekend it was 8 hour sessions for three days and my wife would tell you that I was delivered from from lust I was delivered from a lot of different demons like I would cry in such a way she said your face didn't even look like your face the way I was like crying and breaking down because it made me we thought we were going into this to deal with our marriage

but I actually was going in to deal with myself it was like no you're going to we're going to deal with Adrian and we're going to deal with Erica and my wife had her own things that she was delivered from and every day we left feeling so like like like emptied emptied of just different different things different things were falling off um bitterness anger uh for me Shame Shame was so big for me I struggled with shame it even tried to creep its ugly head back up recently but shame was so heavy with me because

I couldn't believe what I did I couldn't believe I let myself like go that deep into it and not feel guilty about anything um and that's the thing when you're outside of Christ you're desensitized to sin you think that you're just doing what makes you happy you don't care about who you're hurting in the in your path and US during that weekend that marriage intensive changed everything in our marriage um even to this day we're now we're helping other couples uh go through similar things that we've been through in our in our young marriage so

if I could talk to my my younger self I'll say my my eight-year-old self I would tell them that that everything is spiritual connecting with someone sexually is a spiritual thing because of what God created it for and what just happened to you with that lady doesn't mean that you have to believe this and you have to accept this in your life I know you're on your way to go play football but you have the power to ask the right question questions right now if your mom doesn't can't answer this for you find somebody that

you you look up to talk to your grandmother talk to anybody that you feel like can help explain what is it to to be with a woman sexually or what is it to be with a woman married like how am I supposed to really treat women how am I supposed to look at women um are they just pieces of me because I get aroused and that's all I desire or am I supposed to to understand what love is truly understand what love is like how do I love a woman without it always being a sexual

thing how do does his intimacy mean sex all the time because we both know that that's that's not what that means and I would tell my 8-year-old self this last part is to to keep looking up and keep saying Jesus because because that means something in everything that you do everything you're going through when you look up and when you're saying Jesus when there's any type of trauma you you're doing the right thing by calling on his name because in his name there's healing in his name there's power and there's name in his name that's

covering I would tell my young self that everything's going to be all right Adrian who is Jesus to you Jesus is the latter and there's a song that says there's a ladder in the lashes on the back of the high priest my Jesus you've made a way for me and that's who Jesus is to me he's the lad that made a way for me I I'm I'm smiling because God is so good I was literally listening to that song in the car just now and when when I think about the light that came to me

that night when I was 5 years old after getting beat that light still to this day is what I see when I pray it's what I see right now when you ask me that question he is my light he is my latter that that made a way for me that's who Jesus is to me Adrian what is what is your relationship if any with your father today I apologize to my father uh um not apologize but I forgave him uh back in 20 I knew I think it was before I had my first son 20

it was 2018 2019 in that uh exchange I as I told him that I forgave him and he said back to me I forgive you because you could have reached out to me I knew I was healed from it because I didn't even react how I would have reacted in the past I just looked at him like wow wow like he really hasn't changed and I said you know what I forgive you man I love you you know God bless you and I recently saw him probably a year two years ago was we were traveling

back to Tennessee and as we're driving I'm just showing my wife and the kids like where I grew up and then I realized that this man lived around the corner the entire time it had never I never knew this my whole life life and we went to his house it looked the same the same house and he opened the door he didn't recognize me at first and I said it's JR he came out and he was he wasn't this man anymore like this guy that did all this stuff he was very frail and and weak

and I remember helping them out helping them down the stairs to see the kids yeah but we don't we don't really have a fatherly relationship if he calls me he could call me we can talk we have talked but it's very awkward uh when you talk to someone that that only wants to talk about themselves but I I lost I removed all hate I removed all bitterness from me um yeah that's that's pretty much where our relationship is today how about with your mother oh my mother we're we're we're good man like my mom uh

she's been healing a lot she had a lot of like had a hard life a lot of stuff done to her but my mom I love my mom our relationship is is definitely stronger it's mostly me just help reassuring my mom that it's okay like she can't do anything about what happened in the past you know it's just really just letting her know that both my sister and I we love you Mom we just want you to be around we just want you to just heal up take care of yourself but my mom and I

we definitely have a good relationship we talk all the time Adrian can you pray for those who are watching right now and are being reminded of of wounds of the past you know things that have happened to them as a child everything from sexual abuse and I would say even going up to being in marriage and those wounds uh that have affected people all the way to infidelity could you just pray for those who are in the shadows right now and are saying man I relate to that and I want that freedom amen yes thank

you Father thank you Jesus father God I just I just thank you Father for being Sovereign I thank you for being our covering today Lord God and I I just want to pray for the individuals watching watching and listening to this that can relate to sexual abuse that can relate to infidelity that can relate to dealing with shame or battling with lust Lord God I just want to pray father that the holy spirit moves in them to not only come out of the dark and into the light Lord God and confess that sin but I

pray Lord that you do a work in them that will lead them to serving your kingdom Lord God I pray for restoration and marriages Lord God restoration and individuals that still struggle that are still Bound by sexual sin Lord God and I just pray right now that we like through through through this ministry and through this prayer right now Lord God I just pray that we can rebuke those spirits in the name of Jesus father God that those chains start to Bro break off right now Lord God I pray that the holy spirit is moving

in their life life and and there stirring up a boldness in them Lord God to not only uh share what what they have done father God but but not be bound to it anymore father God I pray that they can lock arms with other like-minded believers that they have a church that is a Biblical Church Lord God that they can go to that there's a safe haven father God for them to share and confess their sins and not only confess them but repent and turn away from them Lord God I pray for that repentance to

take place right now that they are falling on their faces Lord God crying out to you seeking your face father and revealing what they have been bound by and struggling with free them from this anger Lord God free them for the from this bitterness Lord God anything that could be restraining them from truly seeing your glory in your face and the work in their lives father God we know you desire freedom for everyone Lord God we know you desire peace and love and you have grace and mercy available to them as well Lord God I'm

praying this covering and this this anointing this fresh anointing over every individual right now now Lord God that is listening and watching and may they walk away from this not being the same but ready to serve and seek you and reveal what needs to be revealed make the Crooked way straight Lord God in Jesus name we pray amen amen Adrian any last words for for people that are watching your testimony right now for anybody that's watching I just want you to be encouraged I want you guys to know that there is a God that loves

you there is a God that has called you to hire things uh he's known you before you were ever formed in the womb and I just pray that as you guys listen to this and you walk away from this that you start to seek his face your identity is in Christ and it's always been there I don't care what the world says I don't care what culture says it is God that made you righteous through the sacrifice of Christ and I just pray that you guys are open to receive that in Jesus name hey everybody

God bless you this is Eric vatto president and founder of mission DEA Fe man it's been amazing to see you rally around us as we continue on our mission to create the world's largest Archive of Jesus testimonies until his return We Appreciate each and every one of you who gives to make these videos possible what you are currently seeing on the screen are donors who gave in the month of October next month month you'll see the names of those who gave in this current month of November if you would like to give in support of

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