you suck at cooking yeah you totally suck today we're making the Big Mac Taco not to be confused with the small Mac Taco not to be confused with the old alpaco not to be confused with the Bigg e tup Paco which is just a taco with a lot of beef the reason we're making this recipe today is to unite the people of Mexico and the people of the United States of America in Anger over defiling their most sacred Cuisine but this begs a question is a taco simply the form of a tortilla wrapped around anything
or if you change the ingredients of a taco enough does it cease to be a taco also this is a burger but is bis a thurer now I don't want to get into whether or not a taco is a sandwich because it's not a sandwich is actually a borderless taco also if you're interested in the history of the taco it was invented in the year zero by God just after the big bang also known as the big Baco tacos start with tortillas and we're going to use flat tortillas today you can use a prism tortilla
if you want which comes from San Miguel although it's much more difficult to get the ingredients to stay on them but we're going to use Flat Earth tortillas and we're going to add our ground beef which comes from the ground you can use those thin artisanal meat handling gloves if you want but using a spoon to create a Smash Burger type thin layer works really great without having to get meat on your nice gloves also did you know that the word artisanal has another word inside it it's the word is and it's jammed right in
the middle the difference between what I'm doing here in spreading icing on a cake is that when you give cake to Children it doesn't usually make them cry now that we've got our beef frosted tortillas ready we're going to fry these on our pan which is on medium heat which is actually High because I let it heat up for 10 minutes and 10 is the hottest number and we're just going to pretend we're making a pancake for 2 or 3 minutes while we prep our other ingredients starting with our pickles we're going to dice these
pickles so that we can roll for initiative but of course the onion always wins because it minmax like crazy dumping Charisma for crazy high decks now we're going to grab our driest most desiccated onion and chop it up until you've got delicious onion sprinkles now we're going to grabb our lettuce Iceberg we'll chop that up and you want to make sure there's no ice left on the lettuce after whoop that way when you're eating it your mouth won't get whoop and now we're going to make our Big Mac sauce which is one part Mayo to
one part vinegar to one part Mayo to one part mustard to one part Mayo to one part ketchup which is actually Sriracha to one part Mayo to one part paprika to one part Mayo to one part onion powder to one part Mayo to one part mayo and we're just going to wangjangle that together together until we've got Mayo okay I totally Wing that but it actually tastes so good I think because of the Mayo and now we're ready to flip our traditional non- prismic Taco beef tortilla type cylindrical disc shaped thing and now we lay
me down to cheese and we'll put the roof on there to create a taco sauna until that gets all melty while the other side of the beef Cooks right through the tortilla utilizing the heat conductive properties of the tortilla because it's made of tortilla and not aerogel once that's done we'll airlift this onto the plate which is actually a cutting board let's call it a putting board and we'll immediately hit that with an offensive amount of Big Mac sauce we'll follow up with way more pickles than you'd ever actually see on a Big Mac and
we'll add in a pathetically small pinch of onions to keep true to that traditional Big Mac taste where you only get onion in one bite while maximizing both profits and disappointment and then we'll add lettuce on top of that to Pretend There's Something redeeming about this and if you keep adding lettuce you turn this from a Big Mac Taco into a Big Mac taco salad or you can embed the Big Mac Taco into a head of iceberg lettuce to create a Big Mac taco lettuce wrapped taco and if you put that on a bun you
have a Big Mac taco lettuce wrapped Taco Burger add two slices of bread and you have a Big Mac taco lettuce wrapped Taco burger sandwich throw that on some dough with melted cheese and now we have a Big Mac taco lettuce wrapped Taco burger sandwich Pizza which is the traditional food of the people of the Romania region of Italy Bona petito
