How to differentiate self love from selfishness? | Buddhism In English

Nam buddhaya welcome and welcome back to another video couple of weeks ago we posted this video right here about self- love let's take a look at it first remember the more you love yourself the more selfless you become do not confuse self-love with selfishness ND so lot of you have been asking in the comment section what is the difference between self-love and selfishness so from today's video we're going to be discussing about how to differentiate the self love from selfishness now to understand about this first we need to understand what is selfishness now selfishness always

born from the unsatisfied nature of our mind that means we are not satisfied with we are not satisfied with ourself and we are not satisfied with other people so what happens we try to fill this unsatisfaction fill this Gap in our mind to satisfy ourself so what we do we we make expectations towards ourselves and towards others and when the people around us and even ourself are not meeting these expectations of even ourself what happens to us we try to pursue and we try to chase behind these expectations and filling these expect expectations even more

and more and these things these chasings go beyond the limits so what happens a person becomes more selfish only thinking about his own happiness his own pleasure and his own Advantage he doesn't start to think about the other people's happiness so this is selfishness so we need to understand that selfishness is always born from unsatisfied nature of our our mind but in the other hand self love is always born from compassion understanding and acceptance now when you understand who you are and when you accept who you are then you become more compassionate towards yourself then

you know who you are and what you can do starting from that you start to develop yourself more and more you give a good time to heal you give a good time to develop your inner qualities and you become more patient toward yourself and also when you develop the patience you become more patient towards other people you all know that not every person around you can live up to 100% expectations of yourself so we need to understand that when you understand this the nature of yourself and the nature of other people then you become more

compassionate and then you become more more selfless you become more generous because you know how it feels like to go through sufferings you also know how it feels like to go through painful periods in time so when you do that when you when you develop that patience and compassion you become more self loving person okay so that is why we need to understand that self-love is always born from compassion understanding and acceptance we don't deny who we we are we don't try to reject who we are we become more understanding and more accepting towards ourself

when we become more accepting towards ourself we become more content with who we are and become happy with who we are and one of the greatest qualities that we develop through this is the Gratitude we become thankful for what we have in our life we all we don't say that oh everyone needs to fulfill my expectations and I'm not going to commit anything for you you need to fulfill all of my expectations those emotions won't happen when you become more self-loving person so understand the difference between the self-love and selfishness the Buddha said if you

love yourself you have to guard your mind from Evil things evil thoughts like jealousy hatred aversion and envy when you guard your mind from these UNH wholesome thoughts you protect yourself and that is self love when you protect yourself you protect others as well so keep this little beautiful advice from the Buddha in your mind and be happy