Chiyaan Vikram Anna On TRS - Opens Up Like Never Before | Aparichit, Fame, Love & Healing

has Fame been a teacher like my struggle was so long and so intense that that success was always a dream for me I was very popular in the South nobody knew me in Bombay and for me always even today they was telling me like I was getting mobbed and they said sir don't you get tired I said no what do you mean I wanted this so badly you know for an entire generation of non- Tamil Indians you're the first Tamil star we came across wow you've done such psychologically bending roles what was the film that

troubled you the most on a human level other thing is upper just Disturbed me a bit because we had three characters and my you know Cinema is like my blood I just get lost to it's very rare to see someone so passionate about their work because I thought I'm the only psycho in this room I'm some sing S Club can you talk to me a little bit about sadness but it's always been a struggle for me even today it's a struggle for me I was going on a bike and I had an accident I was

doing something and I looked up and there was a lry almost on us you know a truck with buffalos are you comfortable talking about the night of the accident I mean I've never said this anyone they took me to the hospital they said let's amputate his Lego he's going to die my mother was devastated they were taking me in the lift and there was this dirty compound and I actually asked him Anna can I hold your hand because I was scared you know even I was to go for movies I had to sit like this

what do you pray for like I I do healing so I'm are you talking about raiki yeah like raiki if somebody has a headache I can heal them even like even if they're in America I can do it long distance I can actually heal them I would love for you to recommend films to all audiences 12th fail I thought that was damn good and even love it's nice I mean the problem is we can't do films like that why weird things which are so funny in Hindi in Tamil people like they were like what the

hell have you seen David the first shot itself I'll slap a woman my mother will slap me when was the last time you were blasting angry when I was a child in school I was in boarding and I was in my third grade or something I used to wet my bed one day that brother had enough of it and he got the stick and he started whacking me you know what I did suddenly I said brother stop let me hit myself I'm a sinner I'm a sinner I hit no no no no son don't do

it didn't wake up today thinking I have this [Music] conversation apparently it's the first podcast that's been created on the Indian internet with a superstar from the Tamil film industry it's Vikram sir who features on today's episode of the RVE show my intention is to always bring out the human side of my guest on every single episode that we create on this podcast that was my intention with this episode as well but by the end of it I took away a lot for my own human journey and I hope you feel the same by the

time you finish this entire episode with the Tamil Legend Vikram s who features on TRS today [Music] Vikram Ana absolutely honored to be sharing screen space with you thank you R it's I think it's totally Mutual so I'm not even going to say it I'm just you have such a great fan following even in the South and um it's amazing because I had this pate of interviews and my friends just kept calling me have you done that I said no they haven't fixed it no no you better talk to them right now because he's the

best and blah blah and I'm so glad it's such short notice too I think I'm lucky how could we ever say no to this opportunity sir thank you uh seen you all over televisions in our childhood yeah it is you know what I'm going to ask like I become the aait The Stranger became the what is opposite of aait uh prit parit parit parit yeah ah how do you perceive that real it sir that you know that's how at that point pan India so called pan India got to know you actually actually no it was

it was it was see it's in your life especially for actors nothing matters more than recognition you know so for me it started in my third standard I played this little afroamerican girl without any dialogues I just stood on stage I was stupified and I saw these 2030 kids were sitting there and I felt that magic and from there it started and I was doing Sentry or some Watchman or you know I mean like a soldier without any dialogues and that itself was so gratifying for me from there I started seeing one line dialogues then

five lines then the audience became 50 then the next girl the whole school 500 then the girls school so thousand so you're looking for a wider audience and finally got into Cinema and you know you start it's just and then it's Telugu and and then suddenly you realize like somebody in bomb like I was very popular in the South nobody knew me in Bombay and then I was going with this friend we were shopping something and then one guy looked at me and I said I think he recognized me she said hey come on yeah

you're Vikram I said yeah but nobody knows me here and then he he came up to me and he said are you that guy and I was like wow one guy recognized me in Bombay you know Mumbai I mean that time it was Bombay and uh that was so exciting because somebody in Bombay actually recognized me then later of course in France someone recognized me and someone in you know Norway recognized me I mean they were still tum but you know for the for an actor it's the wider audience and you know so aparajit did

that to me like uh Pagan was South India but aait was what put me on the map Indian map you know people actually and and it was I think the need of the hour not just the movie people identified with that character and what he stood for and I always thank Mr shanka for that for doing that because I think that's one of the most beautiful things that happened to me there's so many tangents in my head sir right now there's a part of me that just wants to have a human conversation with you because

there's so many human traits about you that I admire have to study very deeply for each episode and I knew a lot about you but my research revealed even more layers because it's not as simple as just absorbing research and then creating questions from it we watch a lot of past videos we try reading between the lines so I have a whole human set of questions that I have to ask for you go for it but first we have to talk about upper of course let's trash it out uh you're someone who's a 100er so

I have a very dear friend Zakir Khan he's told me that in media You'll Always Find two kinds of professionals one's a 100% who will give 100% to everything that they do be it a podcast be it the smallest film rle be the biggest film rule it's the same amount of intensity wow and then there's people who are just not 100 perers they maybe are 990er you are totally in that 100% club I'm a little mad that way in the sense um sometimes there'll be this interview which I'm trying to avoid and I don't really

give interviews and then I'll say okay but then I'm sorry I can only give you 15 minutes then I'll go sit there and I realize that I'm not doing justice so I start doing half an hour then it'll be 3 hours after a point like I'll be in it 3 hours three and a half hours we'll be talking because I feel you know you have to do it right and then my manager say an 3 hours hey wait wait we still talking right you know it's like that it's anything even if I my daughter's school

if there's a project it has to be that way I'll have to like help her and make have a river and then have Sprout something Sprout and then you'll have a rise field and then you have a thatch roof and it has to be that good like why so I've always been like that from when I was a child not I don't know if I'm a perfectionist or it's just that I'm obsessed with even the little nitties and it has to be perfect anything like if it's my dog I have to brush it right like

if I'm sweeping I'll actually go to the maid and take the broom and say let's do it this way this is not the way you do it everything has to be it's not like it's not I wouldn't say OCD but it's just that there is a way to do it and there's no another way to do it like driving like my daughter Drive proper swimming it's the right stroke like for me it's you have to do it this way that's the best way to do it you know how are you as a student student I

was a dream I was terrible like U Back bencher no yeah I was my the like first bench always till my eighth where I used to be the first five ranks and then I discovered Cinema and I wanted to act and I became the last five ranks I never came beyond that and I never studied in my life I mean it's a very bad example I shouldn't say this but I've never studied because I was always dreaming and I did science and math and I got first class I was the last in my class but

I got first class I just I used to talk I to like I I I'll have gentle knowledge and I actually got first class and people were surprised I got first class I was the last in my class though and then I did literature and stuff and I mean rest is history I'm glad that I didn't my parents wanted me to become a doctor marks went enough then maybe a dentist thank God I didn't have enough marks I be there in a clinic somewhere instead of following my dream H even medical professionals are being celebrated

on podcast nowaday of course as they should yeah but that wouldn't have been my dream it would have been my parents dream right they wanted me to be an i officer or to be a doctor for me I've always wanted to be an actor but they didn't want you to be a part of Cinema no the irony my Dad ran away my dad is from paraki which is Kamal Kamal hass's uh Hometown uh and he his father was a Headmaster but he ran away from home to act and he was a very bad actor I'm

sorry Dad I mean if he's listening he was he couldn't act to save his life but he was so obsessed with it so I think it's just genetic loading and I became like that my son became like that but from that time I've been wanting to act like I've always wanted to act so you you spoke about eth standard right uh could you name a set of films from that period of your life pre-teens teenage I would all of kamsa's movies at that time like 8th 9th and 10th it was all we didn't have the

opportunity to watch Hindi films maybe the only Hindi films I watched is something which like was a huge like shy was a big hit so I saw chol we'll just have one of some of these rare Hindi films which come down south we didn't have the net of course so we couldn't surf anything but IID watched all of kamsa's movies and I tried to Fashion myself according to the him you know so at that time it was vamu then sadma which was another thing it came much later not 80s a little later then padar which

is a beautiful film most of my films were F you know like his films Raj sir I discovered much later and like I suddenly discovered Style and what he does but Kam sir was it and as a child I hope I'm not digressing what happened is I was always fascinated with acting but came across this little booklet wherein there was a school master who was doing different like he had pictures of himself as a postman as a beggar as a communist as a Watchman uh as a magician and it was all with just basic makeup

but he used to look very different in every picture it was about 100 pages and that kind of and already I have sivaji sir who you could see one picture and you'll know which movie it is from he and he's a very he comes from a very dramatic style of acting so he could do all that but you would know if you see us still you'll know so that kind of you know struck a deep cord and I realized that when I become an actor every film of mine I should be different but not just

in the pictures I should walk different I should talk different I should laugh different I should eat different I should fight different so I've tried to do that and it's not just films like sayu or P Magan or whatever even my most commercial films like kandasami dild dul they're all it could be I could just be Vikram the star but what I did is I'll try to show something very different like the way they fight the way he like d will be a guy who wants to be a cop so his actions will be very

sharp and he's very fit and very light he's like but Sami I was already a cop so he will not fight the regular way it's even a slap will be you know cops they don't punch it's more like slaps and because they hit from a position of authority so they're not scared you know unless they are crowded I mean surrounded by hoodlums and they're going to be killed or something but otherwise that and AIT was somebody who's like very powerful so every film I'll try to do that you know it's just fun even the dance

like I don't know if you've seen tangan there's a song where I will dance like somebody who doesn't know how to dance I've tried to do that which is very interesting for me as an actor so I try to that's what they say about great acting that happens through the body language as well I don't know but legendary acting happens through the soul wow thanks I I hope I reach that one day I think you already touched that Mark let me let me okay to you have some more room to go sir yeah there's always

room for improvement and I always feel acting like in most crafts especially acting you can never have learned everything you're never that like for instance like there was that period when Sai s used to act when everything was dramatic I told you if he's a coward he's a coward if he's Brave he's like that way and you know it's all drama it's they come from that school then we had this thing where it was like normal acting but a little dramatic now like like about 3 years back the director just told me don't act just

be every expression is the same happiness sadness you're C unless you're crying just just be dead pan so that's a trend so it keeps shifting you know it keeps changing and you can never learn everything in cinema but it's so nice I mean Technology's brought in so many new things and you adapt you learn you pick up stuff you're such a happy and humble person sir thank you I'm very happy I'm a happy person but you've done such psychologically uh bending roles that's what I feel like you become a whole new soul in all your

films what was the film that troubled you the most on a human level I think um there's film called D turar which is a takeoff from of I am Sam where I'm differentially abled that was very difficult for me because you can't act like them you can't act but I went and I was in I went to the place called scaf where they have children like that I used to just sit there and just not even absorb just be there and just get that energy and then when I started doing that I I just picked

up Little a few mannerisms but then it was more about being in that space so that role was a role that Disturbed me a lot because initially I was not able to there was a lot of things like you know that my hand my shoulder I us should realize that my shoulders should be different my hands will be moving and I picked up a action from my son he'll keep doing this so I was thinking I could do that then my mouth the way it goes my eyes and like the way he looks around and

he'll stumble and he'll stammer and he never does say anything the director said something very nice he said let's not have dialogues he'll just tell me the scene and say you say whatever you want so it'll be just like um you know I I I I don't know what what to say and you know the way he talks I could say anything it was in the dialogue so that helped me a lot but what happened is you won't believe it took me some time to get into that because the way I'll walk I'll walk pigeon

toed I'll Shuffle then I'll be Shifty so all these things can't come in immediately you know you can't you can't practice so you do the as you do the scenes you get it so even after the shot I used to walk around like that I'll be like that but that period like almost two months or something I couldn't come out of it once I got into it so every day I I'll actually go have a bath change into normal clothes preferably jeans and something Natty stand in front of the mirror and say hey you're Vikram

you're not Krishna you're Vikram come back it used to disturb me that way that was a role that really Disturbed me the other thing is uper just Disturbed me a bit because we had three characters and now it's easy for me to shift like I can be a shave shifter that time I wasn't like that so if I did ramanam first then we did Remo then we did aparajit so we used to shoot for 15 days then sh sir will get use the next 15 days to get ready and then 15 days 15 15 off

15 on you won't believe I actually used to go sit on my Terrace I had gotten pigeons I'll just sit there set them free watch them fly whole day I'll have my breakfast lunch dinner there'll be a c a coer CAU I I just lie there I'll be with them I'll come back in the evening that's it I won't talk to anyone cuz I couldn't switch off you know it was like that but over a period of time now I got into a Zone where I'm more comfortable but now I did tangalan which again Disturbed

me a lot like almost like suu where I dis discovered a new type of acting now again tangalan is like I've given it my all when you see the film you'll appreciate that I mean you must have seen the trailers but if you see the film you'll realize that it's not about wearing a loin cloth it's not about not wearing slippers not about not having protection not about the snakes and scorpions which are there that's a very different kind of character you and you cannot act I think all of us had to be there in

that area in that time in that era and uh it was very consuming and it was so immersive that like and what was nice is we didn't have shots like cut shots it's like how we're having a conversation now we just had the camera moving all around every scene was one shot and there are 300 people so it starts with a take we never go for monitors he'll just tell the dialogue let's move on we'll go through the third dialog cut cut cut no try again from the first it'll go again like 30 takes 40

takes and we have to keep acting because the camera will keep moving around we had a trinity it's like a steady cam but it has a swiveling head so you can go down you can move around you know it's it's so easy that way and it was very difficult because you couldn't like let me say like like five of us are talking and then you want to cut between you and me the other can go relax you know have a smoke or you know uh uh talk on the phone or just chat here that didn't

happen here the world was very alive and and it was moving around and there no trees so we didn't have Creature Comforts like chairs vanities nothing you know you we just had to wait there in the shot till 3:00 when you have a lunch then go back so that became very consuming and get it like it was spiritually mentally physically fatiguing like I was so tired when I finished and that is the most difficult film I've ever done till today and when you see the frame you'll understand 5 hours to do my makeup and then

when I go to the set it was kgf so it'll be freezing and they'll all be wearing monkey caps and they'll be in a Shaw and we'll have this cloak take it out and we just wearing a loin cloth they say sorry sir sorry sir and they take that and plaster mud on us and it'll be like cold they say sorry we'll put some hot water the moment you put it again become cold we'll freeze I'm getting Goosebumps thinking of it and after that it'll CI and it'll start cracking so it's very iy right so

in that we used to act it was always Ash or dust or mud or gold dust uh and then we used to act and every scene was difficult even a romantic scene would be physically challenging like we'll push and we'll shove and because then women were not like now they're not doile they were like men they have calloused hands and you know stuff like that and they would work they would fight they would look after the family so they were equal to us so every scene was like that even sitting and eating now you can

sit in a tea shop or a coffee shop and you have a coffe it's not like that the way you sit what you do how you relate how you talk and it's a dialect so it's it's it's nice Cinema is so nice because you can challenge yourself you can do roles that are the most fascinating thing is for me to do a role that's very distant from me and the more distant it is from me the more excited and I think this was the most it it it I had to touch a very Primal cord

to reach that space you know to discover that guy and it was very interesting that Journey it's very rare that you get to meet someone as intense as you no I'm I'm very I don't know if I can talk about other things this way but I'm very you know Cinema is like my blood I just like get lost in it you're thinking about it all the time passionate about it all the time whichever film I'm doing like it's tangan I eat tangan sleep tangan like you know eat tangan I walk tangan it's always that only

that anything pertaining to that every time I take a movie it be that my diet my workouts Everything Will Change like tangalan I I couldn't look like a body I couldn't look like a hero I had to become light but my hands should not be you know muscular the body should be different and you should look like one of those guys M so stuff like that so every film will have a specific set of exercises specific diet that's the thing that people know about you so that you really really transform your body now I'm getting

to know that you transform your mind and your soul also but on the surface level it looks like you've transformed your body heavily yeah um has this had any kind of impact on your health over time yeah definitely it would have but but you don't know that right some things are not quantifiable like let me say I did a film called Kasi where I play a blind man and I to roll my eyes up you know and there it was a remake of a Malayalam film where you can see the pupils but this director had

a bright idea I don't want to see the pupils so you really have to push it up which is wrong some people I had a friend who will sleep and his eyes will go up automatically I couldn't do that so I practiced because I want to do the film did it for 5 seconds 10 seconds 20 seconds then 1 minute then I started bathing with it then I'll put glycerin I tried and then I when I met him and said I want to do this film he said really you want to do this can you

do that I said yeah oh wow you can do it come let's do it but then when we had the shot he say where are you going to look so I'll be sitting like this okay keep the camera here whichever said I'm looking you'll keep the camera which means I can't I can't bring my pupils down and if somebody makes a mistake towards the end of the scene we'll do for one go for one more take I could only last about like 20 30 minutes and then my eyes were like like you know I I

thought I'm going to have I definitely had a problem I couldn't see I couldn't read anything I watch TV for almost three months after that definitely would have affected my eyesight like while when I did seu which is the original of theam uh there was this period when I go bald and I'm in the mental Asylum when I used to have only one chapati one dry chapati one beetroot or carrot juice and one egg white through the day what's it like going into the head of someone who's mentally challenged it's it's it's you you just

go I mean that's that's that diet all of that helped me because I used to be just blank director used to tell me when you call me sometimes I wouldn't even hear I'll just be lying down somewhere you say come just I didn't have to act I was just him and that's all I ate just that dry chapati one beetro juice and one egg white through the day I don't have it twice a day just that I'll space it through the day and I used to walk to the location to lose weight so I'll walk

8 and 1 half kilomet Walking Half kilm back and then my costume was I it'll be tone and there'll be blood stains on it cake blood and I know that you can't recreate that so I didn't wash that for almost two months I should just wear the same thing over and over and do things like that so I'm sure that would have affected me and then when I did I I didn't know how to lose weight I had to lose I had to be a bodybuilder and from a body body builder who is competing with

Mr Bhutan Mr India Mr Karnataka Mr Tamil Nadu on the stage where you can't it's not graphics we had I had to look like them from that I shift and become a model from that I become this guy who's from almost 90 I became 52 and so in three months I had to do all this three months I Chang change so what I did is I started eating like only 50 calories but I'll work out 100 calories that was which is stupid actually but that's the only way to do it so I used to do

that I was very weak I used to do cycling also on top of that 15 kilometers every day plus workout was all like just ropes and resistant bands and stuff not weights so I'm sure it affected me definitely I wanted to get that 50 I wanted to become 50 because it's a magic figure but the doctor told me like we used to do tests every month or every two few weeks and he said all your parameters are like you know suddenly there's a little you know shift there and it's it's not right if some major

organ fails I don't know what you'll do so let's not you know take that risk so after 52 and I was incidentally I was actually lighter than my heroin at that time she was 54 or something and I was 52 and I had to carry her so I used to tell her why didn't you carry me you know it was Amy Jackson you know how frail and she's very petite but she was actually heavier than me at that stage was it all worth it of course it and it was only for one scene mind you

I always have this cloak this one scene when I take it off my director said why are you doing this I don't want you to do this I said no I want to do it and it was only one scene but it was worth it because everybody who saw the film recognize that effort and we are talking about this this comes up in effectively your legacy as an actor as well definitely it it it it it's not about like you know you do this you change your look for every film I I have a purpose

for that I just want to become that person it is not like let me look different you know like I mean when you're putting yourself so immersively into an experience the motivation behind that procedure is it for the sake of of Cinema is it also for the sake of any level of commercial human success is it for the sake of self-actualization like why as a human being are you going so ham at it and I say that with a lot of respect I'm not like I'm just saying that I'm asking out of curiosity no no

I for me it's I don't know it just captivates me I feel that when I do it like it it'll see it's not a decision that I take you know like consciously I think okay I'm going to do this it's not like that what I do is before once I hear the script I listen to the director I'll talk to him I'll get feedback I'll keep talking to him back and forth and there's an image that forms in your mind even as he's narrating the script I'll be thinking okay he'll have a goatee oh let

him have a pot belly oh yeah he can have a little gray maybe a little bald yeah okay then later through the scenes I say no actually he needs to be a little tough okay maybe he has a pot belly but he's tough he's worked out and you know but he has a okay but do I do that putting on weight or do I no I don't pad up let me do this so it'll be running through my mind then I'll talk to the director director will say you know maybe as long he's like this

blah blah blah then I think okay so after that mentally like the next two months or 3 months I'll just run that character in my mind and somewhere he'll formulate and then when we go to shoot I will not think what I'm going to do I'll get the scene and by then maybe the first day or two it'll take some time for me to settle by the end of the first maybe for tangan it took me three days after that when the director tells me do something I'll do it like him it's not like consciously

I'm going to do this corre like you know you immerse yourself and becomes that guy and you know and it's it's very I don't know how I it it works for me and and but the get up the look what he looks like it'll be something that I consciously will think that it should not look like anything I've done before but I'll try to become somebody more than you know just for a get up see you can look like somebody and still act like you right so but instead do and tangalan was very difficult because

I'm not that guy I'm I I'm from a boarding school and there you learn etiquette and how to eat with spoon and fork and I eat only with chopsticks and I like I sit very differently and there suddenly I had to be this guy to the extent that when the britisher there's a britisher in the film an Englishman when he came and started talking to me I didn't talk to him because I didn't want to be close to me why would I want to talk to him where he's the guy who's made us all like

you know civilized and you know be prim and proper so I didn't talk to him and he was like a little upset actually then he said can we meet after shoot I said no Danny not right now maybe so much later and I spoke to him and he used a couple of foul words and he said I thought you were that because why would you not talk to me I said I don't know if I can explain to you Danny I was trying to get away from me and what I am so you are too

close to that I mean you're so far away from what that character is and you're never going to understand then he said okay okay I get you yeah but yeah let's have a drink sometime I said not now maybe once the movie is over you know like that does the success or failure of a movie matter to you of course because it's there are some movies like there's a film of mine called cobra where I've done some scenes which like see AIT I think you will always like that scene where I shift between the two

characters in Cobra the interesting thing was he had the scene where my mother is there it's all in my mind and my mother then my professor is there then there's a little child and uh there's another guy there are five people and I will have this conversation where one guy is like a comedic thing when the five of them talk I will be talking along with them which means I had to mimic there I I thought it's better to do that so the comedic guy I'll talk like him with his pauses and then the next

fellow will talk and in the middle they'll be talking amst each other they say no don't listen to me he's a stupid theny say yeah and he laugh then the mother say please guys just leave him alone so I will talk along with them in one shot so the timing had to be right everything had to be right and but that movie didn't do well so somewhere sporadically you'll have something where they say wow what a scene but that's it if the movie had been a success that would have been celebrated would have been one

of my finest you know performances but that's what it is and finally see I'm not trying to be like commercial and let me get a blockbuster I'm trying to do films which are different and it's like now tangalan is a big hit but what is sweeter is it's not the regular film it's out of the box it's it's a film that cannot be a 100 CR film but it has become that you know because of performances because of the director did and all of that so this is like wow we actually did it like the

what I've been trying to do you know all along I think there's a narrative all over the country sir that Cinema across the country is gradually moving more more towards commercial Cinema yeah yeah and and kind of the art of it is rested upon the shoulders of people like yourself yeah it's and and with the it's changed do you realize with the p people have started wanting to watch large films like films that are like Larger than Life like you like even if it's a pushpa even if it's a bahubali even if it's a kgf

why is it and in Hindi films you all can't do it because the moment you do it they won't accept you but they able to accept South Indian films which is very range which is why now you have South Indian directors coming like even Shah ruk's Atley like he's from the south and you know the thing is P I think all of us got locked in and now we just want to be liberated from that and see something large so we've shifted you know that way but at the same time having said that content based

films are really working right now cuz like 12th pass 12th fail or 12th 12 fail right that one like these are all films that have like you know they have so much interesting content and so nice watching all of them that's one side that's booming and you have these 100,000 Crow films which like you know they're large and like even uh kki or whatever you get to enjoy them it's it's nice I mean we are in a very good space now yeah uh can we speak a little bit about Tamil Cinema y I think the

country is starting to discover the goodness of Tamil cinema at this point yep because of the again the whole pan India wave yeah so for people who are just starting to discover it and it's a difficult question I'll ask ask him but could you name four films You' introduce them to if you want to introduce Tamil Cinema to [Music] them that's a good question Tam Cinema uh manisha's film nagan is a fantastic film with Kamala that it it is almost like Godfather but it's a it's a beautiful film that they would love to watch why

so it it it is it's like a biopic of a gangster and it goes to different uh you know ages and to think that kamila was actually only 34 or 35 when he did that film but he plays a 62 year old man or a 70y old man and towards the end and it's a beautiful film it's a classic there's a film called padar which is again Kam's film which I like which was done by Mr bhadi Raja which is from the village it's really nice then there's a film called udri pukul which is a

very old film it's a classic well one second sir the second film you named can you also explain why um that is it's a very raw film it was the true genre it's like like like a village very rustic film which was you could actually look into this is how Village Life was in South India and in that you have a protagonist and you have svi kamalar and the villain is Mr Raj Gand can you believe it iconic like to the extent that I will still I I may not remember my dialogues I remember all

the dialogues from that movie they used to have records with the dialogues and I used to keep listening to it beautiful songs and svi I think that's her first film and Raj s is like he hadn't yet bloomed and become a superstar kamela was bigger than him it's a fantastic film that's that's one of my like one of my best films if I want if I wanted to make a remake I would love to like you know do kamel's character he plays a c in that he's a village Bumpkin and he's like a Duffer what

a performance I don't think even he can repeat it it's like that and this one and I would love people to watch Raven in my you know the Tamil version of it it's it's it's a very interesting film the way manisa had crafted it and U another film I UD is an old film it's a very old film sorry I have to ask you to expand a little bit on raanan also ravanan is uh ra you know it's it's it's very the way he dwell into that character it's unrequited love and the way see what

happened is because it was Ravin and Ram or whatever in the north it was it was not accepted immediately and because of that we felt the backlash in South also really because ravan and didn't do ravan didn't do well here automatically people started thinking it's but now they telling me it's a cult film and everybody's talking about and whenever I they speak about my film they talk about ran and and they say and I think wow really it's the way he got the performance manisa is one of those fantastic crafts Master Craftsman and the way

he got us to perform he will never tell you how to act he will come and create a scene he'll say this happened like let me say aishwaria is there and she leaves me and goes and he'll come and say he won't say you know she's left he'll say you know as a kid you you lost in a trade fair and you really thought that's the end of the world and that's what happens even here that scene is not there you know but the way he'll you know he'll conjure up an image which is just

so striking and you you'll you know okay that's it and what was nice is I had 10 heads it was like that but we actually had sequences where I will have a drummer I will have a I was I play a woman I have I play a drummer I play a a drunkard I play a poet like that I'll have nine other characters you know and we shot all of it so all of that is me but later what he and I'll keep hearing these voices so later he removed that he said no that's not

working but let's keep the voices in my head so whenever I'm talking sometimes he'll come and tell me uh he would have shot with abishek then he'll come and say canny let's try this he used to call me that's what I'm called at home Kenny okay so he says Kenny said let's do this uh try this scene like I want you to be like really powerful so I'll do then he said no it's not working can we try you very vulnerable then I'll try vulnerable then he say okay try try philosophical then nail that that's

nice can you shift to so we'll try something then he'll call back Abhishek the next day he'll reshoot it in that mode so we could actually try different characters for each scene you know and when you see the way he's gotten the performance like I don't know I felt very proud of my acting in that and I have to thank Mana for that but the way he's played it and it was a very tricky thing because it is actually about RAM and ra Sia and so he could not do anything that's you know you know

questionable so I could not like like it is a love story between ravan and satha but he could not you know actually elaborate or amplify that so how close can you come to that without you know risking the ra Wrath of people you know it was like that and he's called it renant so he's actually put it out there but the way he's handled it is very poetic and and of course we had the irony was p and svin again it's again awara and me again she's somebody else's wife again he loves her but he

knows it's his is his love love of his life and they never get to meet each other I mean and he falls in I mean he dies because of her it's the same thing and it again got repeated which is beautiful but raavin started it all okay fourth that's udri pukul UD pukul is it's a very old film by Mr mahendran and I mean nobody will know the actors right now but it's about relationships and you know there is like the woman will be wronged and what happens and it's one of the most classic films

in I mean something that everybody must watch in Tamil udri pukul is like that and there's another film of kamelus called push Puck which is a fantastic film because it's a silent film but it is all it's comic it's like it's with Amala and Mr kaml and Kamal Hassen and it's it's it's in a hotel and there a lot of comedy scenes in that but the way they'll do it without one word of dialogue was very you know intriguing and at the same time it was very exciting and kaml Sir like I told you I

watched all his film so I was that's it I'm also glad ponan silin got a mention mention it's such an important film from an Indian context yes it uh this is almost angers not just myself but lots of people in my generation that we're not taught about the Chola Empire as much as we should be taught in our childhoods true and I think people are starting to learn history through YouTube at this point and lots of Indians are getting upset about our history syllabus in schools Yep this is this should be one of the top

chapters it actually would instill a lot of pride in every single Indian yeah yeah it it's very you know what you're saying is so true because at that time you won't believe we had the biggest Maritime force can you believe in the world and it extended all the way to kadaram kadaram is Malaysia Indonesia a time when even like ships were like something they had a nautical Force like that and and they conquered they moved North they did all that and it's and Buddhism and you know karate kung fu kaler P all of it was

taken to other countries where they prospered more than India it's I think all of it like we you know we such a diverse nation and I feel there's so much we are missing out you know like you say because history has been hidden in some places even Ranjit keeps talking about tangan like that he says history you know highlights a lot of things but a lot of societies lot of tribes have actually just vanished nobody knows which is why he says I want to talk about and tangan is like that he wants to talk about

that particular tribe which this is what happened how did kgf happen like the kgf you saw with Yash Rocky B is a very different cinematic experience which is beautiful this is not that this is like base it's raw it's struggle and in that how they find gold what happens he's try to do that and history has been unkind to a lot of people in the world and actually that's a poignant Point you're talking about sped so much in that but I'm I'm just loving sitting in front of you sir getting to know your mind I

again I repeat myself it's very rare to see someone so passionate about their work thank you like uh that's what I admire because I thought I'm the only psycho in this room I'm same Club I think I think it's important to have you have to be a little mad I always believe Nana par I read an interview where he said every actor has to be a child and a Madman you know only then and maybe even a woman you know if you can do that then you can cover most roles right some some level of

eccentricity is needed and perhaps when the world starts accepting you as an artist that eccentricity keeps growing I never thought that actually that's the word you're saying using but once I was asking someone do you think I'm yeah you are I said seriously because I think I'm very normal no you're very eccentric I'm pretty eccentric like I was telling you right I don't go out I don't party I don't smoke I don't drink I'll be at home I'll be with my pets I'll do gardening I'll work out my gym is also at home so when

I'm not shooting I'm at home I don't do anything it's just it's me my space I just love that I'll watch movies I'll watch anything it's but your thoughts are about acting at that point yeah it it depends I may switch off whatever but I'll be zoned out I'll read like you know but it's not anything specific I'll watch nothing I I'll have different moods I'll have a I'll watch a romcom suddenly be watching a horror suddenly I'll binge watch suddenly I'll say shitak and I'll watch the whole you know Season all the seasons and

like in two three days I would have finished it it's like that in a way this is also the training of your mind right like for example for writers what they is once you hit a creative Blog the way to overcome it is to read yeah because you're filling your mind in with something and then uh I actually saw the Salim ja documentary on Prime video yesterday okay uh everybody talks about yeah oh my God so like I watched a little of it I should see it I think uh Salem s said that the most

beautiful form of creativity is when you can hide the place you've been inspired from and then present it to I was like that is so pretty that's the story of any artist also that you've seen something somewhere you're inspired by it you want to recreate it but you do it so well that people are not able to link it to what you've originally been inspired even even as an actor right you embibe from life like I'm a people Watcher so I love that whenever I'm anywhere like if I'm in the airport the station if I'm

traveling somewhere I'll always I'll be just watching absorbing data yeah you just it's not like okay he's doing that oh he's scratching his head oh he's sitting on no you you just keep watching and you know you somewhere it all gets it's like an encyclopedia it's in your head and there's so many volumes and suddenly you want to do something and you know it clicks somewhere something will work and you don't have to plan you know it's this this is a question that planned for the upper section okay you're basically dealing with a character who

had schizophrenia yeah right yeah not schizophr it's more multiple personality disorder okay so he's like he's got these other uh egos alter egos in the there's one known case who has about 24 or 40 different people and you actually become those different people and whoever you're becoming won't know you know your original character you also won't know when you become that you become that it's a very the thing is Sir and knowing how intensely you dive into characters uh I would want to know about any aspect of sadness in your mind one during that apar

phase of your life and then in your whole career in terms of sadness that's the other thing they say about artists that artists have a habit of holding on to sadness because it creates some level of art within their heart which then they can present to the world definitely definitely can can you talk to me a little bit about sadness sadness uh let me say I've I've told you already like from my third I've been very like obsessed with becoming an actor and just searching for a larger audience from like 20 students to like 500

the whole school then the girls school and then you have only Tamil Nadu and like I get into movies and Tamil Nadu and then suddenly Andra and then rest of India and you know it's always like that but to get there I had a lot of roadblocks in the sense uh I did a I did a play once uh called black comedy by Peter Schaffer and it was an IAT and uh what is interesting is it's about a play that I mean you start in total darkness like it's total darkness and you're just walking around

it's a com comedy and suddenly the lights come on and we do Ulta it's like oh the lights have gone and then the whole plays with the lights on but we are in darkness and there he's having an affair with two girls and then one of them is Rich and her father is a a military officer and blah blah blah and it's a comedy of errors and it's so funny so but what happened is because it was darkness and it's a college right so like they first they were like what the hell is going on

and after the first two minutes they started booing like we are not from that college we were visiting they started booing and it went on and it got very bad 10 minutes and we still dark and then slowly like the lights were coming on and then by then half the audience like started saying sh while the other half was booing and then they just caught on and it was crazy they loved it and they' put up by when we walked up we saw on the notice board somebody had said fantastic and it's like you know

what a great play and congrats and all that and they'd given me an award or something and all that and we walked back we had to go back on the bike it's a 5 km walk but we said let's walk it was late at night it was around around 9 10 11 or something which is late for Tamil Nadu Chennai and we walked back and then I was going on a bike and I had an accident that day like this is that same leg injury yeah it I had this accident and it was a bad

accident very complicated and we they took me to the hospital and they wanted to amputate my leg it was that bad because I just had like if ID had a cut maybe the blood would have come out because there's no cut my bones had broken so there was a hematoma inside my big leg became this thick and the pulse stopped so there's no pulse so you'll get gang green I still have gangar like super whatever so they didn't know what to do in the government hospital they they said let's amputate his Lego he's going to

die but my mother was there and she said no and and that in those days if you had an accident the police case so you had to take the person to a government hospital and they they not equipped and they had to shift me to another hospital because they didn't have equipment to cut my leg it was like that I'm sorry this all sounds very gory it's then my mother said we took me to a private hospital and then they did some magic they released the blood and I got my pulse back I still had

gangar and I was in bed for 3 years 3 years I had 23 surgeries I was in bed I had an infection and then one year on crutches I didn't walk for four years and this was last year of college I had pins and it was crazy and the doctor said you can't walk you won't walk anymore and uh my mother was like she was devastated she said what are you saying what are you saying he can't walk he said no he can't walk I mean be happy he's got his leg and then my mother

said Doctor what is the use of having his leg if we can't walk no we're going to cut it right here and that was how it was but in my mind I wanted to be an actor so badly I said no I will walk I won't just walk I'll run so I used to go swimming I'll have my crutches and I worked and worked at it and then it became one crutch then I used to have just one walking stick and I couldn't even walk and the thing is I can't I couldn't bend my leg

because this operation was done after five months you know so by then my knee had stiffened I couldn't walk and blah blah and how do you do that how do you act in a movie if you can't bend your leg like you know I had gone through all that but I had decided that I'm going to I'm going to act and there was no chance of me let alone becoming an actor I was not going to walk even if I walked how would I become an actor but I did that and then I got into

movies somehow I got into a film and I did a Serial then I did a movie and another movie and none of my movies were hits like the maximum uh audience was always only 20 25 people it was like that and that was for 10 years I had this long struggle before suu happened and then so that whole period it was like the doctor who saw me after 5 years he looked at me and said hey you're walking you're not supposed to walk and you know he was shocked like it was like so which is

why I'm so everything I relish every character every frame and every movie of mine because I think of everything as a blessing like somebody who could not walk and it's not like I had a bad accident I was going to walk eventually I I was not supposed to walk so even now I can't BN More Than This which I but I decided like in management they say make your weakness your strength so I said no I'll be a fighter in the I I fight I fight very well I mean you've seen my films um dancing

possible but fighting I can really fight well and there are some times like when you have to like Tamil weddings you squat I can't squat so you talk to directors and you you know those are the only times but and I have this thing and even now I have lot of problems but for me it just keeps going because I need to do this and and he met me let me say almost 15 years back or 20 years he he actually met me that you know 5 years of me I think and then he he

said wow fantastic and he took the x-rays and he saw it and he said wo I think you should you know don't run don't climb steps don't jump don't do this don't do that I said Doctor but I'm I'm an actor that's all I do you know he said no no no then he said AA okay you try but be careful then after 2 three years when I went back and my wife said it's doctor he's not listening doctor I don't know why he's doing this doctor again saw the X-ray and he said I don't

know there's something I don't know how it's working for you but it's let him just do it right let him I mean that's his life let him blah blah so at that time he told me like your knee is like a 76 year old man's knee it's totally gone how do you do it but I'm saying my dream was to be that actor and I'm going to do it like like my my wife met me the first time like she asked me like the first time she's met me I was on on crutches and she

just said uh what do you do I said what do you do she said I'm doing mfil in Psychology I'm going to do my doctorate what do you do I said nothing now but I'm going to become a big actor and she told me later much later like two three years later you know I thought you had delusions of grandeur because I know you can't walk my friends have told me you're never going to walk again you can't walk but you wanted to be an actor not just an actor I said I'm going to be

a star I will be that and I'd always I'll never think I'm going to become an actor and say I'm becoming an actor I used to write like like SRI Raam J do you all have it here there's something called SRI Raam J where you you know you write in books you know like manifest yeah but not it's a slogan like it's like a religious thing in the South where write SRI it's about Ram so s s you you keep writing it like that in my books I will write I'm becoming this I am this

I am this I am this I used to do that I used to only manifest manifest I'd read this book where this guy says just think about it think about the producers who going to line up think about the directors always was you know I'm going to become this and I just willed it and it had to happen I imagine all all the directors I thought of all the producers I wanted to work with they all eventually worked with me but it's always been a struggle for me even today it's a struggle for me you

know like it's it's it's it's a struggle but I don't know why it happens that way but I'll never give up like and everybody asks me I'll tell it's my blood group and be positive so like there's a lot of tangents here so yeah it's uh I might take you on a tangent which you may not enjoy but it's for the sake of this video which is going to be on the internet for the next 50 years of course are you comfortable talking about the night of the accident yeah sure can you explain in detail

what happened exactly and what you remember from your eyes uh see we' were going on the bike and the funny thing was I was not supposed to be on the bike I was supposed to be in the car you know we don't have bikes and cars and I mean very few guys had so there was this boy who was supposed to go on the bike and then he said pan he there was a girl he was in love with and she was going in the car so he said I'll go in the car you go

on the bike so I got on the bike and you know how guys are when they're on the bikes and U if they sense that you're scared they'll do stuff they'll you know start doing funny things so this guy will do it once in a while say be careful and and what happened is he was just because the middle of the night he took his legs and put it on the crash guard and he was doing that and I there was a shoe tied up and I just like I was doing something I looked up

and there was a lorry almost on us you know a truck with Buffalos and this guy had his legs on the crash guard so he couldn't break so what he did very playfully accelerated and tried going past and the Lori hit me and it broke my thighs like it broke into two places broke here also and I suddenly look down and am I being too graphic no please please I look down and I see two knees and there's no pain I just you know I think it just like I was thinking what the hell I

have two knees and then then by then people came running they tried to lift my leg and that's when it hit me and then they took me to hospital and then it started do you remember the moment of impact I I remember I mean I flew and this guy was just sitting there nothing happened to him mother bike the headlight went but I took it on my knee and you know I I I flew quite a distance and then I remember the hospital it was very weird because my legs had puffed up like this it

was so big and they were cutting my pant and I was telling be careful yeah that's very expensive or some nonsense I was saying and then I remember they would take me in the lift and there was this very dirty compound I still remember he was wearing khaki shorts and khaki shirt which was filthy one very scruffy guy was just standing there very suen and he was going down the lift and I was alone in the lift with him and I actually asked Hima can I hold your hand because I was scared you know and

it was like it was like a very weird moment because I felt I needed some kind of comfort I needed some support and I felt so lost it was like it was that kind of a night it was very scary it was like was this probably one of the most important nights of your life yeah it it it it molded who I am like you know it's to become who I am what I wanted to be like my mother is a very strong person and she's always told me like whatever like if I tell her

I want to meet Narendra Modi G and she'll say yeah why not she'll never think I can't do it and she'll try to make it happen she so that's always been in me you know like I've always wanted to be I'm very positive I'll work at something but this taught me that like the way I went I I don't think I would have been very good at a desk job I worked in lint as a copy I when I had crutches I tried to go learn computer thing I studied uh that time there was cobal

and database or what and I I did all that and then after that I went and worked in Lintz as a copywriter I was trying to do something you know get into a creative field I I couldn't sit at a job and do anything I mean sit at a desk and thing so it was like that and and and I tried to do I did business administration for some time I went and learned something somewhere I couldn't finish that I was like I was in between jobs I didn't know what to do but I wanted

to be an actor that was all that you know was you know getting hold of me and I guess I don't know what I would have become if I hadn't become an actor but I don't know I would be something in cinema maybe even a Lightman maybe a photographer maybe you know an assistant director was there ever a moment of self-pity in that face actually never like I was always positive I I'll always I watched mayi you see myi sudha she she's a dancer and she has an accident her leg gets cut I know she

is because she acted in Hindi TV yeah yeah so that story is like she's a dancer then she has an accident and then she'll come back with a false leg and she'll dance and you know that's a story and the same Doctor Who operated on her operated on me so I used that's the first movie I watched I said if she can do it I'll do it and you know and I actually told my mother I can't bend my like you know how stupid I was I tell I told her I can't bend my leg

but how am I going to act when to amputate my leg so I can you know do you know have you know a false leg and maybe have this thing where I I mean I've never said this anywhere but and I was thinking let me I can do a karate film and then I can do this and she said are you stupid and my mother like almost whacked me so I was like that you know in that face like I wanted to somehow become an actor and it was very strange my leg will be like

this and even I to go for movies I had to sit like this you can't hardly sit in a theater you can't put in your leg so I used to even an auto I'll sit like that and it was like crazy all of that that that part like like the fact that Shucks I have to be an actor what am I going to do you know that that that thing was like a very scary thought initially but then I said no I won't let that I'm going to walk I'm going to run I'm going to

fly if I can but I'm going to be an actor I have to be an actor and I like I was very like stuck on that I was obsessing on that just for context here all I want to say to you is for an entire generation of non- Tamil Indians you're the first Tamil star we came across really of course wow for an entire because aarit was has been shown a lot on TV so like if you I I know it was almost 400 times because I was in Z it used to keep coming every

week it was there and I I've actually thanked them I also called them and told them thank you so much so I'm sorry I'm bringing up aarit so much because it's a big reference point for especially the Hindi belt uh um you'd never watch aarit and think that this is his backstory yeah you know when you're on the roof and everything with with the cool Remo he jumps down and his You' never think that this guy's leg was blasted once upon a time and he's gone through what he's gone through yeah of course Al also

because you have a very happy Aura and I think that that's what people are drawn to primarily about other than the obsession for character and all that you're a great guy andk that's become public knowledge sir but what we're talking about this being the most important night of your life yeah it's it's it's it's more I I guess what if that hadn't happened maybe I wouldn't have tried so hard think about it maybe I would have just tried and just let it go but this was it was very defining for me it was very nice

and yeah there are other stories which I don't want to talk about because connected to that because that gets a little too personal for other people and I wouldn't want to talk about that but um someone broke up with you because of that no no breaking up with me not happened like like it it very not breaking up it's like it happens like it's no it's like somebody who could get me into films and a relative of mine and and he'd like whatever like the way they speak and whatever and that kind of didn't anger

me like I was just thinking no I'm going to be an actor I'm not going to tell anyone that you're related to me I'll do it on my own my own Steam and I will do it and I feel there's there's a there's something in Tamil they say you know something like that actually inspired me to become something else something bad fueled me into doing something you know where so stuff like that had happened and like you'll see a lot of stuff for me even that struggle of 10 years not having any break see the

thing is after that I somehow some guy I did a Serial somebody came and said you do a Serial there was only six episodes I was there in three episodes and then after that somebody from an Indian Bank came and said we're doing this film there were 34 producers and it was a very small budget film which means if anybody gives 50,000 he's a producer there were 34 producers they were all belonging to the labor union or whatever and they were doing a film which was a very small film which didn't do well blah blah

blah that's how I got into films then I was doing small films and I like it didn't work for 10 years so after that I had the 10 years struggle where nothing worked you know nothing I touched worked till teram happened sedu and he was a director it was very strange that movie there were six heroes six or seven they started the film with them sometimes they'll have the Puja in the morning and evening it was dropped stuff like that finally we did the film and and when he said the first shot when he took

I was just seeing it and I was like wow who's this guy there's something very different about him then we shot shot shot shot and we did all this and I was like wow now okay this is going to be good for me and then we did the film and they didn't finish the film there's a problem the producer he ran away then I went and spoke to him and brought him back and said Anna please finish this film for me and then he finished it and then the movie was there for one year nobody

bought the film they'll come they'll cry they will celebrate they'll say you and the director will get Awards but this film won't run and then the movie was released in one theater regular shows all the three other theaters it was only three theaters or four theaters that time in Chennai they were noon shows and this one theater was a regular show but the that theater that theater was next to a Terminus so the doors will be open always like you just find guys comeing and they just they then they'll have something then they'll talk then

they'll look loud then they'll walk out they'll come back that kind of a theater there'll be 10 people off and then we the director and I will go sit and we'll be just watching then they'll be watching then they say oh okay then they'll get little involved and then slowly like reviews started coming out like one once in a decade you get a film like this and like that stuff and then sun TV they put out something saying what a film and all that then slowly people started coming in so slowly the theater started filling

up so I'll be sitting then slowly I started I was stand near the door then after that I started like I started getting mobbed so you'll find them they when they come in they'll just say they'll say that guy is a director that's a hero then they'll walk in they're not bothered then they have these shutters okay so in during interval they'll come out they'll say means like you know T like head and once the movie gets over you'll find them coming out my name is Chan and that's why I'm Chan vikam they'll come out

CH like you know you can see that in one show it'll change it was very weird like all my like you know the most beautiful moments happened then you know I can i' I've told some people you know you could have bigger hits you can have Blockbusters you could make 100 to 10 two 200 crer but that first movie when after a long struggle when you actually you know hit gold you can never you know create that again it was so weird the things that happened you know like I didn't know once I went to

the theater my mother had come and my mother said Get me tickets for the next show and all and that also happened that I told you know there noon shows and then one Regular Show the noon show guy called me in the first week he said uh I said sir he said we're taking the movie out I said what you so please sir 25 people in the theater it's an insult to us we can't do it we're taking it out this week I said please I beg of you very sorry Vikram we can't do it

one week later he calls up I said sir s s sir he said no no don't worry that movie didn't come so we're keeping it on next week he calls up and says sir he says hello it's doing so well we're making regular shows then you won't believe in that complex three theaters all three theaters had regular shows it became like that so my mother called me and said I want abirami tickets get it for me so I said yeah so I went and I was sitting in the car my mom came and I got

out of the car to give it to her she's going for the next show and I got out and suddenly people recognize me they said and suddenly I don't know if you've seen this movie oh you wouldn't have it's one of kamala's movie gokulam or something S no no sagur I think so what happens is he and J praa they'll talk about how he becomes famous and they'll have an mime okay she'll say become famous and then they'll say and then they'll have this mime like somebody's pushing pulling him away and then they'll both they'll

be trying to reach out and you know it's just the two of them it's a beautiful scene it was like that with my mom and me like my mom I'm seeing her getting pulled into the crowd and because she's a hero's mother she's come with earrings and bangles and blah blah blah and full I'm thinking oh Lord why did you have to come like this woman right today of all days and I'm trying to reach out to her and they just pulling her up and like I was I was trying to go and then they

just caught me but then the security guys came and they said just pushed everybody dragged us and put us into a theater locked the door and they and then they looked at me said what were you doing I said so what do you mean what why did you come here so my movie I know it's your movie when your movie is running in a theater you don't go to the theater I said why because it's all your people your fans who are going to be watching and they'll like you you don't do it I said

but it's never happened to me how will I understand like after 10 years it's never happened to me and then he said sir that's very stupid don't do it and then after that my mother was watching the movie and then she's looking down they clapping being yeah hey Kenny they're seeing you and they're so happy blah blah blah movie got over I said how is it oh my God what a movie man what a movie but you know you know what's the most beautiful thing I said what you know outside when you got caught in

the crowd you know how many years I've been waiting for this to happen and I was like see again go bums I was like really she said yeah how long have you struggled for this and then I called up one of my reporter friends and she said what I said yeah the movie is doing well I don't believe it I said yeah people actually like you know scream my name and they they recognize me oh really I don't believe it I want to see it I said okay so my wife we went married then my

wife her and this lady her name is Malini we went up to this theater and we were in the box and then as the movie is going on and then they screaming for me and she looks huh actually reacting to you okay then again the movie was going she said not bad and she was actually playing Devil's Advocate it's not like she was being rude and then she said but I still don't believe that you know like you got a fan following of ss I don't believe that they reacting to the movie I said really

yeah really the movie got over and I said how was it h nice but I still feel I mean you've not reached you've not hit that spot yet really and then I said you want me to prove it she said yeah how are you going to prove it I said okay I just opened the door and walked out she was up there in the balcony and from the window you can see down so I just walked out and the crowd was just walking and suddenly they saw me said joh just caught me and pull me

push me and all the way down three floors and then I come out of the theater and and they went mad they started pulling my cheeks they started pulling and then suddenly I realized they all lifted me into the air because they didn't know what to do with me they lifted and like somebody who's never had even more than 25 people in a theater suddenly I was up there like a rock star and they were just holding me up a sea of fans and audience holding me up and I looked up and I could see

in that window that lady M was standing with my wife and she was just looking and she's just smiling at me from there like I'm like this like like you know what a moment yeah like I I mean those are all very these are moments you never forget you know God had planned an extreme story for an extreme guy extreme like I think wow after that I mean I've had success all that but that thing that happened for sidu never ever did you cry in that face out of Joy or relief not really but I

mean I used to pinch myself thinking wow it's happened to me finally see I was telling someone also recently for a long time like after like even 10 15 hits after that my worst night every like very often I'll wake up and I'll think that this is all a dream like my struggle was so long and so intense that that success was always a dream for me I'll wake up and think that actually I'm still struggling you know I'll get up and say it's all a dream and then I no no no no it's true

actually you know it's that kind of a it it impacted me so much but yeah it's nice those tenure set up the base of humility because of which God keeps no I've I've I I realized through that struggle I used to see stars I used to see actors come acting you know Cinema is like a lot Tre you know you'll hit gold suddenly suddenly everything goes you know so I'll see people they they be normal they become stars then they become nothing then again they'll be one movie will run and I'll see them every time

I like a lot of like lot of people I see they keep changing and that's when I thought no be the same you know you're not going to gain anything don't let you know success go to your head or failure to your heart that's the thing and always I try to and I think it's a you in a happier space when you're just yourself and not let anything affect you and it's it's like I mean I I don't know it's like one of the most beautiful places to be you know be an actor and want

and you love Cinema when you play that every day it's like your you make your hobby your profession you don't work one day in your life you know it's every day you go out there and you have so much of love from people like for me always even today they was telling me like I was getting mobbed and they said sir don't you get tired I said no what do you mean I wanted this so badly you know it's like and you realize that the fans who come to you it's it's that's a different kind

of love your family will love you your girlfriend will love you it's a choice you know your sister your brother blah blah but a fan who may never see you in his life will have your name tattooed on his chest or his hand and I've gone to their homes sometimes and it'll be a very small room there'll be just one cupboard you'll find your P there won't even be P maybe one picture of his family it'll be your posters your pictures and you know they'll be living in abct poverty but their whole life is about

you so all those things I mean I mean maybe a cricketer can get that but film stars you know we are blessed to have that and also you you get to do something you love and for me because it was something I fought to get you know I I just cherish every second of it has Fame been a teacher yeah it's it's it's it's humbled me in many ways it's like I'm very scared I'm very scared of that like losing myself in it you know it's even today yeah even today that the fact that every

film of mine is like my first film I try to do it and the fact that you have to be ground it's very difficult to be grounded it's very difficult and it's very easy to say yeah yeah I'll do it you can't you will see people around you like change the way it's very difficult to make talk to you the way they approach it's very difficult to make friends once you become famous it's very difficult because they will not it's very unless they themselves are accomplished in some way and so then they can be snooty

yeah big deal just it could be that or they'll always see you as you know maybe a Vikram or a Kamal Hass they won't see me see his name is parasa they won't see him as parari they won't see me as skinny you know so you you never know like so your true friends are the friends who you knew before old Bros yeah but they also can be very irritating like like your best friend like there be friends who are just they don't see you that yeah I have Bloody what you are stupid in that

film they can actually tell you that you're okay but there'll be others who will either they'll be like hey they they'll like abuse you and like they want to put you down because you may be who you're nothing to me that will also be irritating or suddenly they'll change hi Kenny how are you my God so nice yeah oh hey just be normal yeah yeah I'm okay how's everybody like yeah hey you come you want to eat hey hello be cool yeah like you know it's a very thin line you know it's very so it's

a very lonely space like my son is an actor now that day went for a wedding and he was like okay I was feeling little odd I said yeah get used to it it's going to be get very lonely he said what do you mean I said no you'll understand you can't go into an event like they'll say sir you just come you just chill you relax but that doesn't happen when you go to an event you become a spectacle right you can't go for a wedding and just sit there and watch people and wow

blah blah it's like somebody's taking selfies or somebody so you either play that role so you can't go in you go to a wedding just move out you can't like wherever parties unless it's very closed Family Circle or something then it's different even there sometimes you'll get little reverence or preference and that can get little disturbing it's very rare where people so in my home and all that I'm just canny I'm not like like I'll be watching something they'll come in and say sorry we going to watch this what no sorry you can watch it

later it's AA shut up and they just oh God and they go holidays they don't ask me they just ask me one thing are you free that's all where they go what they want to do normally I'll plan everything children become bigger they'll say no you want to to south of France no we don't want oh God I don't want to go to Norway I want to go here no no why do we have to go to let's go to Kerala someplace you know everything so yeah cool what do you miss about anonymity that anonymity

you can't enjoy which I do manage I I I'll I'll wear a mask whatever whatever whatever I like that I like for me you know I am two very different people when I'm at home I'm just me like when I am on the sets I'll have like five bodyguards and I'll have that Caravan and I have to have this and I'll have you know all of that but when I go home I'll walk the dog my daughter's house is just one one block away I'll walk and go and I'll just wear slippers I'll do and

somebody comes I'll talk to them sometimes I don't feel like I'll say sorry no not today not today I can't take a picture you know but I try to be normal I'm very normal like like I'm subnormal have have you ever had a conversation with rajin about exactly this topic no we've I've we' we've like every film that's like like tangan called Sami he called a geminy he called I he called thing films that where I really think I've done well which touched him he'll call he's that he's like everybody does that we talk but

this is too personal space for him I don't think I me so I've not really spoken but he will have that no see Raj s came from very humble beginnings so he will appreciate that a lot you know anonymity for me anonymity is very important to me especially when I'm with family like for me now if I'm doing promotions I do another I become another person I'll just go crazy like I need to do this I need to Garner retention blah blah blah otherwise I'm very close you're one of those people who I can't really

imagine being truly angry yeah I'm not I'm not you don't angers not really not really if if I get angry I'll become quiet or I'll just stop talking like I'm like that when was the last time you were blasting angry my assistant gets it every day but but otherwise it's not like see he got me the wrong pair of jeans today I said why do you do this like I was just telling him after you left why would you this got to this doesn't go with this man what the hell okay cross me can sit

like this but that's because he likes it if I don't do that he feels very bad if I shout at him he's like H sir shouted at me today so sorted that kind of a thing but uh otherwise I I really don't like you know blast anyone I'm quite cool that except yourself not really I'm like how's your relationship with yourself very good place I'm very very very I like what I do sometimes I like would I like to be this way there'll be some questions you ask know existential things or if I don't have

this can I have this then I think okay what if God said okay you can have this but I will take something that you treasure will I like it no so I'm happy the way I am you know I I always I try to rationalize everything you know even my failings I'll try to rationalize not and I accept I always accept even if somebody is like negative I'll try to find a motive why did it happen I feel once you know the motive oh that's why he's doing it then it's easier then you just say

telling your mind like okay accept me for what I am forgive no it's you you had this that this was bothering you or maybe this is why maybe you got irritated with me or maybe you feel threatened by the way I talk okay I understand so you're cooler else you're you know it eats into you this something I'm struggling with and I don't think it's just me I think it's an entire generation what is that than go it if if someone ask me what's the relationship I have with myself it's a very harsh relationship like

I feel there's a version of me in my head which is shirtless and really ripped and holds a whip and it whips the real version of me into doing better and every day I wake up with whipping oh wow and and it's not just you need to be kind to yourself I know that sir but but what what do you think is like what do you want what do you want that's that why is that word version of you doing this to the other version what is it that you feel you want to achieve what

do you think I think what I'm actually just moving toward is betterment every day but my process of gaining that betterment is whipping but what is betterment just improving at everything that's I think that's quite normal but that's very harsh if you're going to be whipping yourself and waking up to it is very I'm really trying to let go of that harsh self relationship uh but I'm not able to shed it off because I've gotten to this point in life because of that whipping so yeah yeah it's maybe it's a driving force but I I

mean from knowing you even the little time I know you seem to be very balanced you're far mature for your age and you're a very nice person so I can't think of like okay if you're doing that so you want to do better but I think where you are today could be because of that no yeah think about it but I think you can be a little easy maybe take one day off the week and like not do it wake up and say okay get lost I'll talk to you later usually what happens on Sundays

when I don't have a shoot is my brain no my brain so it switches off very deeply I almost feel like I'm on drugs or something though I'm not like do you feel good about it or is it a bad feeling so I feel mushed out like there's nothing I don't know what I I feel almost mentally paralyzed because I know the next day will be the beginning of the whipping again so I it's some kind of mental system it's an obsession to be perfect do you want to be something like that I think it's

an obsession to be better but I also know that I mean see no see you must be like if you it's a relative term no better I'm sure you're more much better than like the majority of people but you're thinking of perfection like you want to be that better which is my hope and this is something I've learned from older Bros and you're also in that bracket now so don't mind me calling you a bro no no of course not uh is that I think the process of marriage and having kids and all balances out

a few of your own demons possible or it can be more demanding you never know see you have only no seriously you have only yourself I mean sorry not to put marriage down but now you have only yourself to answer to so once that happens you'll be whipping yourself and your wife also will be one more image of her and then the kid will come and small wh and he also think about it because then the probabilities Everything Changes right it's no longer like now you can just get up and say Okay blah blah blah

blah that's not the same you know and every day is like rigar it just goes like that and then it becomes very difficult then it can be more exacting it's not that easy anymore you know the thing is while I speak for myself I think every guy at least goes through this uh POS reality see you are I feel see you're very creatively inclined see what you're doing you see I I I I do so many interviews and I find this whole thing of what how you put this together there something so unique about it

whether it's you or your team you are doing something so beautiful where it's not just okay let me just do this for views let's do this and let's sensation no you're doing something else but you can do this without like little things like the candle and coffee or the pots and the lighting you don't you can just set it up anywhere and do it but why are you doing this because you're so passionate about it and you're doing something that you enjoy it's not like you want to be a doctor and then you're doing this

no it's something that you really I think you're a good listener you like talking to people and you've realized you must have realized you have that Talent which is why you're doing this in the first place or you could be doing anything else you could just be talking on your own on YouTube I mean who gets to spend an evening with aait you know no but that's because you've gotten there know you've made it happen right like I've searched for you it wasn't like they didn't call me and say this is this and who's this

guy I didn't I asked for you because that means you're there right so that is success in a huge way so that betterment thing doesn't come there maybe you feel if I slow down you know maybe oh God I don't work tomorrow what happens maybe that's that's good in a way I think enjoy it no it's like like sleep you know when you think oh God I'm not sleeping I want to sleep why am I not sleeping you'll never sleep because that is going to keep you a so what I'm reading and the apps I

go through what they say is no okay I'm not sleeping good don't sleep let me just relax I don't want to sleep and then you sleep but if you think no I want to sleep I want to sleep you won't sleep so now you you also should feel the same way yeah I'm doing it and you're not I don't think you're shooking I don't think you'll think H today let's go easy no let's just do one let's take a break no you're working very hard I think you hardly take holidays it must be like you

know because you have to do it around the even if you want to go on a holiday you're thinking like can I do something there but I can't do this so what else can I do so you are like very demanding on yourself so it's nice but don't torture yourself yeah I think the trick is instead of going ah the Whip's hurting enjo yeah great yeah good again try it no seriously that's what I'm saying like sleep instead saying ouch like just say yeah great you know I I did this like talking about whipping when

I was a child when I was a child in school I was in boarding and I I got like I was being punished and this man like U like U I was in my third grade or something I used to wet my bed so one day that brother had enough of it and he took this thing and I remember I was wearing a rain I don't know if I was wearing a rain it was raining and he got the stick and he started whacking me like whacked me and it was hurting Y and I realized

he's going to kill me in my mind he's going to kill me you know what I did suddenly I said brother stop and I hardly spoke Engish I could hardly speak I said brother stop and he he he was like the way I scream he stop I just grabbed this give it to me let me hit myself I'm a sinner I'm a sinner I hate my no no no no son don't do it actually I knew he's going to kill me son don't don't don't and he started crying he took no no leave no no

brother please leave me brother let me H myself I hting very slowly okay and I Sav myself so you can do that get the Whip and start whipping yourself didn't wake up today thinking I have this conversation glad to have met you in life sir seriously bro the thing is the thing is with some people know while the bro is coming out the brain stops this is this is so uh I have some questions about love for you okay sure where do we even begin this how long have you been married now 33 years oh

it's how do you feel about that in 2024 lovely like as a child whatever happened to me and everything that I've become it's because my mother and after I got married it's all my wife so it's been like she's always been that source of support and and I told you she's a psychologist but the thing is she does a lot of Social Service and she's constantly helping people she's a she's an angel of sort so like she's a very very nice person she's malayali I'm Tumbl so I guess my the sobering thing that I have

that being grounded or whatever also is a lot from what she is you know so how did you know she's going to become your wife Bells rang when I saw the first time I like it was like I don't know I I I just saw and I I felt something and she told me later she heard bells and she saw lights and all that stuff that you normally see in movies that something happened and she knew that I was a guy but already some person had told her that you're going to meet this guy and

you're going to fall in love with him and blah blah blah and all that so she already maybe it was just a coincidence so it happened and and it's very easy now right like you can even have living relationships and it's like everybody understands that it's love and but that time to even talk to a girl was considered taboo and and somebody who's not I'm half Christian half Hindu and she's Hindu and she's malayali and there's all of that happening so but I'm glad I met her and I'm glad she's there and like she's that

factor in my life who keeps everything on evil key even Keel and U it's a very good mother very good friend one of the best friends anybody can have helps everybody so all of that like she's up there I hope one day I can be like her what do you love about the love you share with her yeah we've like I'm I'm sure both of us have our Falls and uh We've Come to understand that I think that's what's marriage all about or even love you fall in love and then there is one particular time

you realize that okay these are their falses and you try to blend your life according to that and move on and then you start structuring your life according to that till a point when it's not a habit but you can't do without them and it's that's where it is you know this is the only part of our podcast and where brief history of meeting you that uh you became guarded and and I see I see that as a POS not question of being guarded I'm trying to put it in the proper perspective you know like

I can be frivolous about other things but I can't end considering she'll be watching this program hello ma'am no no it's not like that it's just that I'm see because you asked me something that I've not been asked in a long time so I'm actually thinking about it too as I I'm trying to put it in the right words and like what do I put do you know who Dr vean is he so he started a big company called Tyro care and he was a son of a farmer know sold his company for thousands of

crores and he's become a bit of a motivational speaker and one of the key things he speaks about is love and he said something incredible he said that young people don't understand what love is and it's not their fault sometimes young married couples don't understand what love is and it's not their fault but true love is only felt after the Silver Jubilee which is 25 years yeah once the pink clouds go go away and it's like yeah true I mean I would assume the pink clouds go away so after the honeymoon phase yeah yeah immediately

immediately it's but I I wonder what happens 25 years in no after that that's what I'm telling you know you don't think of it as a habit but you get so used to the other person that you can't be without the other person it's like everything like everything is very sudden like you could fight you could just be happily together whatever whatever but suddenly if you just stop and think okay if she's not there what do I do and then you really suddenly there's a void you know that happens so like and she's the proper

she's working she's a psychologist she's teaching she does all of that but there's a semblance of balance at home because of her everything is like structured like the food the medicines like going out coming back everybody comes back to her like nobody will talk to the driver they'll talk to her you know is this done is that done blah blah blah blah blah so she's made herself that integral part of the family so you can't like so she's so important like she's made sure that and it's not because she wants to be important it's because

she genuinely cares so I have a friend Dru choer is in my son's name is Dru okay okay uh his wife uh is also a psychologist and he told me that being married to a psychologist was one of the big blessings of his life okay do you feel that as [Music] well yeah I mean she has like it it always she'll see everything in the correct perspective unless she's having a problem with me then when when it's subjective it's like nothing makes sense but when it's objective like she'll like case in point is like let

me say I'm seeing a movie I see a movie I don't like it I don't like it if I like it I like it but she can see a bad film come back and note points and say points which are really good like if I have to talk to the director and I not liked the film I would know what to do because I have a problem I can't lie I'll just say it but her when when the director hears her talking say wow ma'am really thank you like she will she will not lie but

she will find things in the movie which are really appealing and she's that kind of a person she only sees the good in you know so definitely has a sobering effect on me because as you've seen like when I talk I wear my heart on my sleeve and I'm like everything is I'm very volatile and I need to be you know controlled mowed for that I need that balance it's it's like and and she's so different from me we like chalk and cheese so that's also very interesting like everything everything you know like if I

want the airon she'll say no I don't even want the fan you know if I have like like soft pillow and it has to be this thin it has to be go down she has a pillow which is this big and it's hard it'll be like a cement bag so it's it's like that like you know and if I want to watch this program she wants to watch something else I like um I like to dress little flashy and little old and she'll say what is wrong with you you're a father of that child don't

come to school wearing a t-shirt know everything is different you know which what makes it very very interesting what's the most beautiful thing about her her her love for mankind and she's got green eyes so generally the energy and the love she gives out that's what you think definitely definitely it's like like if I see a beggar unless because I have a pro if I see somebody who's genuinely he's blind or he's got a like he's he's a or he's I know that he's incapacitated I'll help but if I see somebody who's really healthy I'll

actually be stupid enough to say come I'll get you a job I really would like to get them a job or something she'll say what is wrong with you he just wants something to give them the money I said no you don't know he's lazy I mean why like you know it's like that you know she will and every day there'll be people outside our home we we help but she'll go that extra mile and so many people and so it's it's like we have this thing like even Nish was saying it's we do a

lot of stuff that's spearheaded by her and you know and uh it's so nice to do all of that for people and you know really do things but that Force the driving force is her you know as I'm listening to you about your life I feel like that accident your leg that struggle phase was a bit of a Karma cleanse for you for entering a beautiful possible main chapter of your life possible it's no it's it's it molded me it's made me a different person alog together but a more positive person I guess I say

this with respect and love okay so don't get me wrong at all yeah the one thing I feel slightly envious about when it comes to you is that I think your wife was with you pre Fame yeah yeah of course right she was but she wanted me to leave Cinema and you know like because her family has poets and like you know Scholars and stuff and I'm just an actor and in the very beginning she was trying to change me and I said no listen let's let's get this straight that's my first love you're the

second love if that's not going to work let's not work you know it was like that so she was like that and she was at times maybe she used to say I was hoping your films don't work and stuff like that and then it worked and now she's obsessed if my tangan like she was I don't think she's pray more than this for anything because she seen the hard work I put in this and she said this film has to work let me pray I'm going to go here I got to go here so now

we we we said okay 100 cres and we're going to Guru and 100 cres and we go to vangani and we're going to do this and blah blah blah and like she said yeah let's do that let's do that and like you know so you you're 66 born yeah I believe uh I'm 93 so we're some we're some time apart my daughter's age yeah you're 27 that time when 1993 yeah I guess so we're 27 years apart but for this one brief question I request you to assume that you me are the exact same age

we meet someone are we 62 or are we somewhere in the 40 something okay how does it feel to grow with the love of your life because I didn't uh have that opportunity as in someone who I was with pre Fame it broke off as it does with a lot of guys in my position who are gaining Fame and that's the dream for a lot of them you've seen Spider-Man mhm you know how he has MJ Mary Jane every guy wants that MJ Vibe but very few get it especially when it comes to maybe you

get it in terms of money lots of guys become rich along with a girl MH very few relationships in the modern day um live through the process of rising Fame yeah that's that's like what I said about Lottery and Cinema know you change it's it's very easy for an actor to get distance from his family distance from the people he loves when he suddenly feels it's very easy because see um when you're in a family there will be friction there'll be things you may like this you may not and what happens is as long as

you're normal then you're both on even Keel it's the same but when you suddenly see when you become a star or something you change it's very drastic that change you know and then what happens is even little things like I can't no I'll have it this way this is how it is I I want silence words up you can get cranky you can become you may not understand or adjust to the situations at home suddenly become me it's about me and nothing else and all of that happens it's it's very easy to happen it's not

like you were born rich or you are always there Cinema fluctuates you know and at the same time when you lose and some things don't work out you can become very bitter and you can blame yourself and you you get crappy with your family you get cranky you know a lot of that Cinema has that thing the like the casualties are very high in cinema Every Which Way so which for me I feel that balance is because I am Kenny when at home I'm vickram when I'm outside when I'm vickram they can't reach me they

want to talk to me they talk to my assistant I will not I mean not talk like like today I spoke in the morning I think lunch break I spoke then I don't like I'll talk to only tomorrow you know likewise when I'm at home they can't reach me nobody can reach me I could be doing the most mundane things with my children it's like that so I'm very clearly demarcated so when I'm with her like we'll we can have our fights we can we can just be normal I don't let that like like see

even actors were just not even maybe they not stars but the moment he comes home a has come home okay okay he's going to you know that thing happens for us it's not allowed it's it's very normal so because of that we are very very very very normal so like when we we go for dinner I'm not just talking about my wife even though it's my children it'll be a very animated table we'll be screaming at each other be we'll be doing some and suddenly you look at another table they'll be on family very quietly

e like how do they do that I want that no but shut up that's boring you know like there'll be one some fight will happen and it'll happen that fast and it'll go away that fast and it's it's so exciting because we're very normal how did you coach your children into normaly from the very beginning we insisted that they go by school Vans and I've told my son never to tell nobody shouldn't don't tell people your father is an actor or whatever my my daughter is like that like when I remember when she was very

young and somebody asked um viam actor and she came back crying she said how can I have an identity how can he ask me that my son is Ulta son is like he's very quiet but he's like he goes to a theater and he was very young and they were waiting he said go tell them viam son has come and there'll be fans who will come to see me but obviously they're very intrigued by the children right so he like he'll take it all and yeah they come to see me and you know he's like

that but we'll tell him no you don't do that you don't tell people who you are who your father is and all that so when you used to see me in school there's something called op I do opodo in a movie called Gemini there's an action I do opodo so that like when I do that fans will go crazy so when he sees he sees me he he'll just say there goes the op man I said why do you say that I just said there goes the op man I didn't say the op man is

my father you know it's like that so all along we've made sure sure that like no just be normal don't tell anybody anything just be normal live your life like this be so they're very normal very like how I am very I guess it starts from me right because I'm very normal normal is very normal it's very different it's a relative term but I'm more normal than most normal people there's a world of a difference in how you are treating people the energy you carry the first greeting uh so just needed you to know that

thanks I'm blessed I'm honored no it's just that see I like I like being me you know not the actor I like being me and I like that space where we just see it's so nice to have a conversation with you where we just we being ourselves and you know more than me trying to have a wall and talk to you from that place I'm going to be faking it I'm not going to be happy with that right so I always feel that anytime I even when I go somewhere even with fans or even when

I'm working I'm like very though I'll have the trappings of I told you when I go as vickram to the set have those five I was one of the first G even Raj s would have had only one security gu I'll have five guys and I wanted a I don't think Raj sir had a caravan before me I used to have a vanity then is I say I need a vanity I have to have it but at home I'll be walking the dog I'll go like time I used to go to the marketplace I used

to go with my wife and we'll buy of course because for obvious reasons I'll Stand in the queue and then it became very very obvious when I was there people start like you know it was then I said no okay I'm not doing that me it's attracting too much and they won't understand where I'm coming from what human lesson have you absorbed from Raja without even having that conversation with him no I I I think he's like how he calls all of us that's such a beautiful thing and he's one of those few actors who

have actually gone out there and he's spoken about me so many times which like how many people do that like there's one particular thing when I did I he said there's no actor forget South India forget India I don't think even hwood there's a guy like a superstar will never say that likewise he's done another time when when I had a Spate of hits and he said a superstar is this in first movie Vikram had this 25% then this movie he got 50% then 70 then he got 100% And then he's got blah blah blah

blah like that's what a super who would say that like you know he's like I was very touched by that I'm very touched by his it's not just his humility he's a very normal person when he wants to be and he's he's a very sweet gentleman that way and and I'm like a huge fan of his work like if he's on St screen and there could be 100 people and you don't see anybody but him and he won't be doing anything he just standing there there's a hotel in Mumbai called Taj lands and in bandra

and we there I have been there we there for an event YouTube had organized an event and we were then I remember one of the YouTubers screaming out rajik kand is right there so I walked up to see where Raja was and he was wearing a Lungi and a shirt and he came out to call out to a guy from room service and then he saw this bunch of YouTubers walking towards him and he didn't have a bad reaction he just had a reaction like oh here we go again sorry guys and he walked into

his room but in that brief 5 10 second period that I saw him even to that mob of YouTubers who was so hungry for his yeah attention yeah attention presence he gave very nurturing energy that's the only Raja story I have he's a very very nice person yeah very difficult you know being an actor is very difficult but being Raj s being an aishwara Ray being Amita bachan is very very difficult because you constantly under micros you constantly have to put your best foot forward it's very difficult you know you you will have especially now

with everybody having a phone with cameras they'll capture something you could have been like that whole day you could have been an angel and that one place you could have just hey sorry one second that would be the thing that see what he did you know which it is Harsh but that that's so you have to have that Persona where you you're not faking it you just you're conscious okay this is how it is or you don't be an actor like this is what you want right so so you do that like you have to

be ready to pay that tiny price no it's a huge price but then what you gain is even bigger you nobody asked nobody asked you to be an actor you know you can have your privacy and live life in you know isolation and nobody will even look at you but you want that and the price of Fame is that but it's not about the acting and you be a star you're an actor whatever recognition going somewhere you give that first casualty is that you lose your privacy for me my main problem will always be when

I'm alone I'm cool I can do anything when I'm with my family I get disturbed because I don't want their pictures out because they have a life and once their pictures come out they can't go anywhere like my wife goes in an auto my children are walking all over but nobody knows who they are what they look like nobody knew you know till recently so when I'm with them so what what I do is to combat that I'll make sure nobody notices me like when I'm going normally I'm okay but when I'm with them I'll

be fully hidden nobody know and when they come in the airport also I say please the problem is you guys even in the theater when they come and say sir you okay that's when people who's this guy you know they turn and look so I'll never I'll just I'll just blend I'll go off somewhere and that's how I handle it if if I was looking like without I'm just the way I am then that's asking for trouble then now you have to understand that people are going to take pictures you can't be fighting with everybody

you know do do you have a disguise yeah and I can't say it now right you know when we were kids growing up in Mumbai there used to be this urban legend about Sachin Tendulkar and vendra seak that they used to dress in a bka and go around I I'm pretty sure it's with my shoulders and my physique I look very odd in that who's this guy I I I I've not even tried it but in a movie like I've tried outfit so that time I know I look ridiculous nothing it's just a mask and

whatever and I basically Chang my my body language you won't believe the extents the it's so strange like like we went for a to a drive-in theater and I was having this monkey cap and the blanket and there used to put the blankets out and sleep and watch and all that you know in the front and I was like I was fully covered and blah blah blah the interval one guy like I could say Vikram sir how are you I said hey how did you know I know your voice so that's one thing so I've

been very careful it's so funny I was doing p and and director Bala said listen we're going to have a transformation so can you he said let's have you like this with long hand you come like looking crazy then we'll change that into like really bad clothes and we'll cut your hair blah blah blah and we'll show the transformation I said okay and we were shooting your pacher so he said why don't you go buy some scarves and scarves or something I think whatever I said okay so I drove with my assistant and we went

down the street in pacher and poner is not Chennai I mean they're not familiar with I mean they know me so I wor this cap I wor this like you know I had a hany and I think I wor glasses I was driving and I know this my voice is recognized right um so we drove and pacher you get lost like it's like they all travel on the wrong side of the road they think they're in France so I didn't know where to find the shop I st and one guy came in his and I

looked at him and I said hello uh where is that I CH my voice and said oh where is that Ramen stores or something and he just looked at me and he said go down that road that third building vikam right second floor I was like thank you what so hilarious how the hell did that guy know I'm covered till here my eyes next time I wear glasses so next time I wear glasses and somebody saying sir I saw your tattoo oh so pull it down next time say sir your fingers you know your fingers

and then they say Sir The Way You Walk you every thing they know and you because I've done so many looks they figure out somewhere and they know your silhouette they know what you're like so it so I have to change all that what's the weirdest fan interaction you've had in your whole career weirdest would be like when I was doing Pagan again we were shooting in teny and there was this room and there was this U when room outside anything and that day I don't know I was locking the door and I was my

having my bag I said why do I keep it let me keep it inside I went to sleep then around 6:00 I woke up and I just went to the washroom I open the door and I see two two boys there's one guy who was like 15 years old and another guy who was or 16 there's one guy who was around 12 they sleeping under the sink and I was like close the door like what and actually how did they get in there because there's just a small exhaust hole okay there's no window nothing and

that's right up there just such a small hole and again I open and and I can see in bad spelling Tamil we are uh sorry we don't mean to harm you in any way we are we are fans and you know we just wanted to spend some time with you I said what spend time with me called my said I don't understand what's happening then he came I said listen listen don't think all the cops but then they had to the hotel guys call the cops and then they said no we actually but the cops

said there's no way these guys could have come in because there's hardly any pipe outside so they must be professional thieves because we found a lot of money in their pocket or whatever then I said please just don't disturb but that's very eerie you know but but think they just love me so much that they wanted to just be in that space anything dangerous that's ever happened with you any stalker stories not really no not really I've not had the privilege of having a stalker story should I miss it should I feel bad no no

no okay not really what do you pray for well peace I pray I'm I'm I'm more into like I I do healing so I'm more Universal energy and stuff but because in school because I'm half Catholic I've done the rosary or stuff so like now during tangan release I prayed a lot I've been praying but otherwise I don't if I'm in trouble I pray a lot otherwise it's just that Universal energy and my de doesn't have a face I I I could sit in temples I sit in mosques I love that piece and when we

travel abroad I love to sit in churches these old churches just sit there with I don't like mass and stuff because I've been caned in school for not going to mass and all that so I'm like no I don't want to do that but I have this very personal communication with God where I don't need to talk true to anyone so I feel good I'll pray I I'll feel good I'll do healing and I'm I'm very like meditative that way you visualize light that's your dating yeah not visualize like no I I pray I pray

to Mary I pray to Jesus and I pray to all the gods I'm really not but when I do healing it's light healing light and you know this Universal energy that he are you talking about Reiki yeah like Reiki it's a form of Reiki okay when you you know cleanse your chakras and blah blah blah how did you learn that I because of my leg somebody came to heal me and then she said I sense an energy and she initiated me into that and made me a master so this is before fame no no much

later it's but the thing is if somebody has a headache I can heal them even like even if they're in America I can do it long distance I can actually heal them this is something that people who've done Reiki or pranic healing and the likes understand yeah but if you know the Common Man hears this there will be a section of the crowd they'll say these people are crazy why are they talking about this no but that's still they get a headache and then I heal them like I I can heal like even the location

all that time if somebody has a headache that's the easiest thing to heal I can heal them Mukesh chabra so who's a casting director office is actually very close by okay I've spoken to him recently for Hindi film yeah okay i' asked him about the core of great acting and he said that great acting always comes from the Flow State oh wow um have you seen this Pixar film called Soul we keep bringing it up on the show like this is probably the 12th time I'm bringing it up on the show soul is it because

it's LED or s o l d s o u l l Soul yeah h so it's an animated film um where they basically are trying to talk about the theme of the purpose of a soul okay in terms of why does a soul take a human birth okay effectively I mean they say a lot of things in that movie they talk about death there's reincarnation and all that yes okay the whole film is about reincarnation about purpose about the goodness of human life as well okay uh about passion Etc so effectively long story short firstly

I feel every human should watch that film because it's a cinematic Masterpiece for me okay I'll watch it I'll watch it um cuz that's the only film you've suggested till now so I will watch it I mean we can talk about fil no no I'm saying it must be very special for you to mention it like that so I mean I'll watch it I read a book which had a very big impact on me it was called The Autobiography of a yogi yogan parans and he spoke about stuff that was so deep that took me

a year to finish that book okay uh and when I watch the movie my first thought was like that the deepest stuff in this book is shown in a children's film there's something very special about this film and everyone who I know that's watched Soul has gained a lot of self-actualization and healing from it okay so they basically say that every human is born with something they're really really really good at and if they end up doing that in life uh they live a fulfilled life so the way they've shown a state of flow this

is something every artist would relate to if you're a writer sometimes there's just words coming out of your pen out of your fingers on a laptop but you don't know where it's coming out you don't know where these thoughts are coming out from if you're a great tailor you'll be stitching the most beautiful suit in the universe and you painting yeah right you won't know true great acting is just like that where emotions and moments come out of your body your mind your mouth and you don't know where it's coming out it's very instinctive yeah

so m chabra s said it's because they're all connected to the source so all the Superstars that you know yourself included are much more connected to the source than people who are not able to reach the highest of the high levels you feel that yeah yeah and yeah I do but my wife also had something to say which is very interesting she said um there is an auror it's not about what a good looker you are or how tall you are or what a physique you have or you great dancer you you see all popular

actors or people who have struck gold who have are big who have done done something in their lives they don't have to necessarily look good or whatever but they have to have the daughter which gets you you know like there could be somebody better looking than that person or taller than that person or maybe it'll never work for them that that one which is almost connected to what you're saying you know because somewhere it connects with everybody how do you become Mass hysteria how do you become somebody who's like everybody goes crazy about like okay

let's say Freddy Freddy Mercury like he's a great singer there are so many great singers why did it work for him why did it work for Elvis Presley you know okay Elvis Presley of course look good too you know that's a different but I'm saying like Michael Jack Michael Jack of course talent but I'm saying there are so many people it will be just that it's not about them looking there would be people who can be better actors than them you know who better looking but may not work so there is some connect somewhere which

reaches out to people and you see that aura somewhere it grabs you right when they enter room the energy changes yeah and there's something about them on screen you can't ignore them nuanced movements right it's called ad in Hindi yeah that and also maybe they even Bad actors you know no I'm saying it's not about them being great there'll be better actors they may not even be actors but there'll be something about them that grabs your attention like you and you can never explain it that is connected to what you're saying there's some flow somewhere

magnetism yeah something so it's called right yeah okay so I could honestly talk to you for days uh but did I make sense this is this is such a memorable conversation for all of us like there's a bunch of guys here who are recording with us and uh you know they didn't have to sit here they sat here for you and we've done so many podcasts by this point that I know when the lads are switched out or switched in there's not been a moment where anyone's been switched out sweet so say something because you're

a good conversationist and you know exactly like you know it's it's nice know the best conversationalists are the ones who are best listeners like and you you ask questions and I like your energy it's very it's very for someone so young you're very wise for your age you're very evolved you know that right uh it's except for the whipping part that you need to be kinder because that other person is you uh I I you know that's something I hope for all you know that is what is actually driving you to where you are today

you know Kobi ran is K Mamba mentality uh it's such a true um truth of success in life that you need to have that sense of internal fire and aggression and betterment but I'm a great case of someone who's taken Mamba mentality too far where it's caused a little bit of self harm as well or you know the story of Arjun and the the eye um there's a price you pay for that so again at this stage of life I'm really trying to understand more about romance and the purpose of love in human life I

just going to ask you how does your girlfriend find all this how are you with her like a child really such a lovely person to be with yeah and she lets me be like that oh nice just accepts me for who I am so you don't have to really try too hard and you're not waking up and whipping yourself in her quarter right because of her nothing I'll tell you how I feel with my girlfriend when it comes to that sense of myself whipping myself she's the person who will hold the hand of the guy

who's whipping the other guy that's so sweet so that's why it's great so she must be even more involved than you yes that's why it took time for her to enter my life I feel I feel I to earn almost but again at this at this stage I feel like the answer to uh cooling down their internal Mama mentality is perhaps a family life and you know a long the way you're describing her you should get married fast the other thing I said doesn't work there yeah maybe that may be that added thing that you

know gives you resolve and like feels you gives you more protection and maybe that guy who's whipping you will stop yeah you know he may take a backseat and say hey no you're doing well you're happy I leave you yeah that's the hope the thing is also talking to older guys it helps a lot and I think that's why people watch the show like I'm just having these conversations for myself as you can sense right now but through my own lens uh people are able to like relate and a lot of questions for people get

answered um the the kind of energy we always try packing into each episode is the energy of healing I think that otherwise there's no point of art of any kind it has to heal someone on some level that's just how I look at the world lovely yeah maybe different arti or change them for the better in some way perfect you know I I kind of look at change and healing as two sides of the same coin definitely I think the Buddha had said this that the purpose of human life is suffering so going away from

suffering is some kind of healing and I think art actually takes you there true uh Before I Let You Go one last art related small segment mhm which is that we have a lot of Tamil viewers watching this episode okay uh I usually ask um uh like how I asked you earlier about I'm the first oh madin was already Tamil right yeah uh so I asked you earlier to recommend Tamil films to Hindi audiences now I would love for you to recommend Hindi films to all audiences for watching this again fil um um this one

what's it amir's film with SEF Alik Khan then um I watched later long back I watched SAA or gaita but I don't know wow I like that film massive throwback yeah I like I like those are films that you know influenced me that time yeah that's actually what I was asking what were the films that created that shift I've always loved films I loved excitement I I'm I'm not someone who's like I like I like mainstream cinema at the same time I like you know um Art House Cinema so it's not then um yeah now

I think people should watch 12th fail I thought that was Dam good and even love but I thought they were amazing films like wow it was so simple but yet you know uh I don't know how much truth is then the following statement but I felt like both these films 12th fail and lapata ladies have yeah they they one showed the truth about the masculine experience of Indian life and one showed the truth about the feminine experience of Indian life and they're the two best Hindi films of the year yeah actually I love that scene

where she will go with him in in 12th fail right and she'll say you think she's going to get angry and she walks away but she says no let's do this you know I loved it it was so I called up VI Chopra and I told him I love that film I mean he was inspired to do that I mean he's done so many films but I was very shocked by that film I I thought I I tried to call the cast in I mean I wanted to talk to everybody it was such a even

lapata lapata am I saying it right lapata ladies ladies wow that boy is really good he's done another film too right as the other film where he's there'll be a gang of guys in Jamara ah Jamara is also a great film yeah problem is we can't do films like that we can't do films like that i' love to try you can't it it it just the whole Market goes for a six right like see David have you seen David like I love that role he asked me to do that and he wanted me to do

what's his name Neil Nan mukesh's role that was actually what he suggested I said no if I do I'll do the other role and he said no but that's like a theater artist or a comedian has to do it I said no I want to do that but don't do it in Tam and he said of course know we doing but then later eventually they release it in Thum see that movie I'll get the first shot itself I'll slap a woman I my mother will slap me I'll get kicked I'll get hit and I'll my

best friend bring this girl and say I love her I look at and fall for her and then I'll think of killing this guy to get that girl you know weird things which are so funny it's so funny in in Hindi in Tamil people like they were like what the hell how could you do that like in Tam you stand for that guy you give up your life for his love and stuff like that and so it's it's like that it's two very different paradim you can't like try both at the same time unless you're

like you know you're trying on a smaller scale you know that's why you and you can't do that like your Market goes for a different I've done it before like I've like really was there and I started doing these smaller films as for characters but then what happen it affects your other films so that kind of thing it's a very tricky thing even doing other languages you know so okay that's a boring topic let me get to that there's nothing that you said today that's even a little boring honestly so thank you thank you I

I really enjoyed talking to you I must tell you that it didn't feel like an interview at all like Dam I think you've just made me feel so comfortable and I of course when I spoke to you I just thought I'm not going to hold back anything and let me just like give you the benefit of doubt if I had any and just open up and tell you everything because I needed that kis too and I really enjoyed it I have to tell you and this after two days of like interviews back to back and

like being very tired and I don't I just had that coffee knot because I was feeling sleepy but I thought I needed to be more alert and I'm glad I had it but even if I hadn't had it I think I would have still enjoyed it and it's very nice means like cannot even put into words how much I respect you and when I say I I mean the whole team prep a lot for episodes really the whole team was unanimously excited and full of respect this morning superb super thank you this is an opportunity

we were waiting for for a very long time wow so thank you for your time sir more than anything no I enjoyed it and I I have to thank you for like squeezing him I I think it's an outcome of the clout and the and I think also that like you say the soul I think that flow was this way we had to meet today and it was like predestined so not my decision not your decision yeah exactly it just happened it had to happen those are the best podcast thanks to your team I think

it was like lovely I I really enjoyed this we'll meet up again I mean unless we've finished speaking everything about my life maybe sometime later yeah I'm so curious to see what you are in the next 10 years so because I know how much artists keep changing yeah and there's so many layers to unpack with you that I don't feel I've done Justice to your whole life until this point we meet after 10 years or we'll meet after 5 years yeah whenever it is uh gratitude for this day this moment this podcast it's totally Mutual

thank you uh and yeah so all the love why is it called beer biceps it started as a fitness channel and I needed the name to stand out okay belly like be B yeah and we used to promote the idea of balancing Health with like partying oh wow I'm a t Toler at this point so okay you know there's a lot of existential questions that I've had over the years and a lot of them get answered with older Bros yeah so again gratitude sir thank you uh more more conversations will be had over the yours

I'm pretty sure an we'll meet up whenever whenever you're free we'll talk we could also meet without the mics and just you know have a chat or a drink or lots more chat about healing of course I think that's a huge topic to be unlocked with you but M thank you genuinely meant the world the whole team is very grateful thank you thank you very much that was the episode for today ladies and gentlemen it's our first episode that's been created with a Tamil film Superstar I'm trying to improve my craft with every single episode

especially for the Tamil audiences please tell me who else you'd like to see featured on TRS I'm happy to make trips to Chennai I'm happy to speak to a lot more people from Tamil Nadu and not just from the film industry the coming one year for me is all about a deep dive into Tamil Nadu culture because after my conversations with Madan gri with kti history and all my Tamil friends have understood that Tamil Nadu is a world in itself and it requires a lot more understanding not just by Indian content creators like me but

it needs to be understood a lot more by Indians all over the world so there's a lot more Tamil Nadu Cent trick content coming up we will see you very soon please send in your feedback on this episode and please send in more guest recommendations until next time guys from r on the team we'll see you very very soon oh [Music]