In today's video we are going to see seven points that will make it extremely clear how the fear of Success and growth are blocking your life and how to finally deprogram yourself from this pattern so let's go guys, pay attention we are going to see seven points so you might identify right away with the first with the second with the third or that you don't identify with But you will find yourself in the fourth in the fifth in the sixth in the seventh So stay until the end so you don't waste your time let's go the first point that shows that it is this fear of growth this fear of Success that is damaging and blocking your life is the Sabotage in which you find yourself when things are going to start to work out when they are going to start to take off or when you already have a small result that indicates growth or highlight Success Sabotage comes, you yourself carry out an act, you have an attitude that you say, oh my God, I'm sabotaging myself again, I'm sabotaging myself again, I need to grow, but this was me stepping on the brakes, it was me doing something to defend myself from what you're doing. defending yourself is because this saboteur mechanism happens, people, it's a form of control so that you stay Where you are because where you are you dominate ah Barbara but I need to have more sales, okay, let's assume, let's create a fictitious goal, okay, you did it, you set it up your small business and you're only managing to pay the company's bills, it's not making a profit, but when you have revenue that you pay that covers the costs, you know, Home, right? You only have one employee or you don't need to have employees yet, it's you who does everything You sometimes go to organic you don't need to make an ad or else you've been making ads but it's an ad that you create yourself on Instagram which you know so you have a certain control it's known we know people that our psychology keeps us in a lot of fur even in relationship, giving an example of other things here because here we are talking about professional success, right, but we can also take it to Success in our emotional life, which I think there will be people who will watch this video for other areas of life as well, so our psychology He's like that, but I already know that little girl.
I already know that little guy Robertinho who is always here in the videos , it's been a while since Robertinho visited us , right? Give me cake, we'll make an appointment, he'll be late but I know him, he's known So this purely psychological side of us tends to leave us in the known zone if you set up your own business or if you have a goal in your company or if you're in a position x do you want to grow in the company do you want to go to work position Y but you don't know it so to have control you prefer where you are you already know it you already know how to do it you have the tools there Bárbara but where I am is at square one I'm at square one Bárbara That's right but you know what it's like being at square one you don't know what it's like to grow, right? Besides, have you noticed that you put a ceiling on yourself, we do that And then to resolve this point, which is just the first point of this S that we 're going to work on here, people, for you to dissolve this fear of success and the fear of growth is to observe if this is a control mechanism for you to feel safe the tip I'm going to give you is to work on two issues here the first is to like the Adventure, like the new and then you'll tell me oh Barbara but this It's temperament that we don't choose, there are people who are more adventurous, there are people who are more courageous, there are people who play more, there are people who get bored very easily and people have to invent new things, there are people who are naturally creative entrepreneurs, I'm not Adventurous I'm not creative I like security Are you a person who goes more towards the safety zone than the Adventure zone?
You get fed up with living the same thing every day? You want something exciting? You're going to watch a superhero movie, aren't you?
Or are you going to do it? a trip Look, in your life do you have something that makes you seek Adventure, everyone has it, we just don't often attribute to adventure the sense of newness in work no work has to be something that keeps me stable a lot of people have this belief if you just keep doing the same thing it never changes it never changes it never changes you start to go a little crazy you go find a different video to watch you go look for a different place for you to visit So take your sense of Adventure of newness that you have that everyone has and align it with your success align it with your growth but if you identify work as just something that has to make you stable and safe all the time you are fragmenting areas of your life work is something that gives me security and fun, adventure, novelty, the sense of creativity and joy is only when I'm traveling Okay, so work will be that stable thing, it will never grow, it will never change, right, so you you reach that plateau and you say why am I not making more money? You determined that for each area of life it's a little box, one thing and it doesn't work like that but you determined that work is just one thing to give you security security He's not giving it to you Barbara is not giving it to me because I I can't even pay my bills security He's giving it to you because you're not growing you're in your comfort zone So that's your unconscious that associated work as something that can't be creative it can't be Adventure it can't be anything new because you learned that work is security, right?
Even if it's security is always in the red, you're safe there, you know, this is one of the ways you start to open up this new perspective, another way of breaking this need for control, even if it's a control that leaves you in the red that leaves you just paying wings accounts that leaves you with low revenue without growth is trying to get into the state of flow as much as possible in the state of Flow when you are working what is the state of Flow what is the state of flow at this moment I am in a state of Flow is surrender to a person who is very controlling or who is very controlling, people because here we don't label anyone but these are moments in this person's life, it's very difficult for them to get into the flow because they're aiming for what their psychology identifies as safe as safety and the state of Flow is when you have a creative delivery or when you have such total focus on what you're doing that you even forget Why are you doing that like I'm going to sit down to record a video no matter how much it has an agenda no matter how many topics it has and I'm going to be controlling oh how many views will it give then when we know the goals we leave the goals aside to get into the activity So when you are very controlling you will hold back your growth because besides you not seeing it you are not being able to put the work as something which may be unstable but an instability as Adventure as innovation as creativity as positive things, besides you don't put your flow in that direction, your Flow is compromised, right? And then when the flow is compromised, you procrastinate, understands the person who is in control, they will procrastinate because they can't release their goals a little and deliver what she's doing if she's not completely sure that she's going to sit down and give that result she procrastinates procrastinates procrastinates so learning to surrender and getting into flow means you have a little more emotional control to talk like that, okay, crazy crazy, right, I talk to myself like that, you're kindly joking, but I say, oh, crazy, stop being crazy, crazy, make the video, just sit down and do it, right, because otherwise our psychology, which is looking for that security all the time, no longer sees creative possibilities for adventure. Seeing work as something that can bring a positive adrenaline rush, we don't see it like that, we don't see it like that, and beyond all of this, we see work as just safety, safety, safety, you're going to sit down to do the activity, whatever it is, people, whether it's a spreadsheet, excel whatever it is if you keep thinking that you have to achieve the result you don't do it you sabotage you procrastinate anyway then these two aspects will collaborate they will contribute a lot if you realize that you are stuck at point one sabotaging every time that you will take off point two is the fear of the responsibilities that will come with growth and success, right?
Of course, this first point that we saw is the comfort zone, but it is more like a control zone, right? I can't get out of control work is safety safety is staying here doing only what I already know what I already know this point two is an addendum but it in itself also raises another issue, okay I'm afraid of the responsibilities that will come It's more demanding when I believe it's more pressure when I'm successful it can be more workload it can be more people seeing me there it can be more judgment with more looks it can be more people who depend on me more responsibility And then, folks, something that helps a lot with this because you end up like this My God, how am I going to manage everything? My God, how am I going to manage everything?
Cool your head and remember, when I was a teenager and I was doing an internship or at the beginning of college, remember, I had this responsibility when I I only studied and didn't work, I had this responsibility and then it was adding more of this later but of course there are people whose life changed very quickly and as a child the person already had a lot of responsibility depending on their journey But it is always possible to look and see how you added responsibility and yes you managed to deliver remember that work that you were super nervous You managed to do it So observe your life, people with neutrality, what is the neutral point that I talk about here all the time, right, when a colleague, a friend, a friend, tells you something, you are in a more neutral point because you is outside of the person's emotional perspective when you are very immersed in the emotional you look at growth for Success and you say I'm not going to make it I'm not going to be able to handle it and look at your life how many responsibilities you have that other people would look at and say like that oh my God I wouldn't be able to handle it but for you it's natural try take that area of life that you say that for me is not complicated and do a study you have to do your own case study, you know people, many times we have our own answers in other areas of life there in love I am a marvel Barbara but in work and success I sabotage myself, but love has always been easy for me, but there are people suffering in love, right? What can you teach these people? your mind works in this area of life which is easy and you do it, my son, the transfer, understand, you don't get a cell phone, you get another cell phone, when you're going to change cell phones and you're going to transfer the data, you transfer the data.
It's logical, so start observing this area of life that for me is peaceful and growing up here being successful is not let's say you have a child you always wanted to have a child You have two children there are people who will look and talk about how this person can handle it and for you you know that you have a lot of responsibility because there is no way a person who has two children say that they have no responsibility, this is impossible So you know that you have a lot of responsibility but there is something that you look at and you say Is it because I care so much that even with the responsibilities I do it in a way that the business flows and at my work Ah bbar at my work I really want to you see it's not the same energy it's not the same energy as you and your children for example Oh because work is an obligation child It's love Oh yeah Who taught you that work is an obligation that work can't be love not because work is work Hmm, you'll see a lot of people who think that children are an obligation and that they can't have all this love, no, ours, it's not impossible, it's not impossible, it's your mind that's programmed to deal better with Mara in life and with the other one, not with who did you learn this from who did you learn that growth is weight and look at the others areas of life that you are growing that you are in bloom, even if it's a gym, people Ah, but it's because since I was 12 years old I've seen my mother work out and I go to the gym with my mother and we work out So you learned that taking care of your body is a joyful thing, there are people who struggle to go to the gym, there are people who have problems with health but it won't because there is a blockage, how do you transfer this joy, ease and flow to your work, do the case study you will see that the same energy that you apply in this area that works you can take it there too and you will see that this area that works in your life has many responsibilities as well as this growth and success will bring you So you can do it, yes, sir, yes, ma'am You have the formula, another thing that happens a lot, people, is Sabotage at this point three here due to the change in life that will happen with success and growth, Barbara is the same thing as responsibilities, no, no, life change, if you are very successful, suddenly you will need to move, for example, if you have a really cool growth that you want, it could be that in your area you become a public figure, for example, And Then you go out on the street, they will recognize you or you may, as I already said here, have to change countries because your growth involves working in a company in a branch of the company you are in, which is in the United States, which is in Canada. This change of life is different from this second point of feeling a burden of responsibility right And we can only work on this change in life when we depend on the identity we have Ah, Rafaela, I recognize myself as a very introspective person, but if I grow a lot in this area in my work, I will be very requested, I'm going to have to go to company parties, I'm going to have to do the social Because yes, we do, there are certain types of growth that will bring changes to us, right? And then it's very interesting because what does it cost for Rafael?
super well that's something she wants She will be working in an area where she launches an authorial project which is a dream she has, that is, the success and growth she wanted will happen but she will have to exchange with more people, she won't be able to just stay cooped up inside her house Sure, she will continue to be a more introspective person. It's nothing that will force her to do things she doesn't want to do, but yes, she will have to have a social event at the company. Yes, she will have to go to more meetings, sometimes she will have to have to go up front and talk, she will have to lead a group of people so when Rafaela speaks I don't recognize myself as a leader No, I don't want to be that person who goes up front and speaks, I don't want to be highlighted, it's because Rafaela, I'm very attached to an identity, it's an idea of who I am And then my ego is protecting this, see we are not talking here about you growing or being successful in an area that will screw with your temperament that will screw with your personality because that is not success Ok guys I know because you can come in comments Ah but you're telling me to do it things that I Hi, so no, right, we're talking about success, growth, things that you want but that you're sabotaging, that you're blocking, so look at this point here that is stated, there will be a life change many times when a person has success and growth in one area she has many lonely victories I already talked about this in one of the videos here, right, I'm wearing the Taylor Swift blouse and I say the your on your own Kid blouse, right, like, because Vitória is often lonely, people think that no, no, no, no she is very lonely because you know how hard you worked you know how much you dedicated yourself when you finally have a result sometimes it's you with that result talking about I got here other people don't have that same stimulus to celebrate as you they will see Sometimes yes, sometimes no signs of your success if you have moved house, bought a better house etc.
if your success is material it will be more visible but otherwise Vitória she is alone she is lonelier and people are more accustomed to being together in the complaint, there is a whole context that I talk about in this video here so when you have a highlight So when you go to leadership you will often feel more Lonely because leading a successful path is often being ahead so if I'm very attached to the identity that I have on this plateau In this limit that I'm here, it's going to be very difficult changing often we also go to the fourth step Since it is the person who has beliefs that keep them in professional stagnation because they are being faithful to their parents and they are not even realizing it, Bárbara, my father was a very humble person, my mother lived in a little house like this, so I can do more but unconsciously I'm being faithful to them, right? I feel like it will be a betrayal if I move up, if I move up professionally, if I move up financially, Oh, if I really move away from my family because my job is demanding So this fourth point say that there is sabotage because you are faithful or to your family or to a group of friends or to a social context or a class that you belong to Bárbara I come from a neighborhood with a lot of difficulties or I come from a social group that suffers a lot something like now I'm going to grow up, be successful and be happy , right, if I am, I have loyalty, right, I owe something to this group. success and success is not just the money is joy, it is self-pride in the positive sense of putting a project into practice and seeing it come to fruition.
So see if you are not aware of this fourth point here, which is being faithful to social family structures of groups that have not grown as much as you want or can grow point five is the famous impostor syndrome or not deserving Who am I to grow to occupy this place who am I to be successful ? this video here you can already show in the next one or leave it there save on watching later on your we on YouTube which will help you a lot, it's a good complement to this one but already giving you a taste here of a tip or an Insight that can bring when you talk like this Who am I to be here that too refers to that third point of attachment to identity So They are different points but they also help to solve Who Am I to be here saying this Who Am I to be here doing this thing Who Am I to receive this award Who Am I to receive this promotion in the company Do you know who you are? You are a person who put your face the slap you are a person who studied to do it you are a person who had the courage to come and speak you are a person who has a sense of contribution to others you know you are the right person for the position you are the right person for the job There's a phrase from the movie The Matrix that I hammer this phrase too, the students on the deprogramming course can't stand me talking about that phrase anymore, right, but folks, I'm going to say that the Esmeralda tablet, right, of all this work on the programs that is the movie The Matrix which is when you ask for NE Why him because you are the chosen one because you think you are the chosen one and ne says because I chose because I choose to because I choose to because I choose because I chose is who are you to get on YouTube and talk about deprogramming belief because I chose to do it I was willing I set myself up I set up the studio I bought the equipment I studied I went through a lot of rubbish in my life I was slapped in the face punched in the stomach I learned I dissolved a good part of the Ego not another part but what I dissolved, I can apply, I 've been serving clients for 10 years, so , right?
impostor, you sabotage yourself, you withdraw into yourself, so it's a circle that feeds back on itself, you don't need any of that, folks, the Matrix makes us look at ourselves and I think we 're nothing special, you know, what's special is what Gandalf tell Frodo why I'm quoting films here in this video apparently, right Gandolf tells Frodo the only thing that matters Frodo is what we do with the time we are given you have this time that was given to you in life what are you doing with it you choose to be the chosen one this sixth point is super super interesting and goes to stressed and anxious people there is a chronically stressed anxious person why do I say chronically because they are programmed to generate these in their lives She doesn't understand she says it's things from outside she says it's things that happen to us but many of us are programmed I was once a person like that to be Anxious to be stressed, right And this person in the stress program she's nervous all the time everything is very relevant all the time everything is very important all the time people who were raised by narcissists are like this I can't make mistakes I can't fail I can't make mistakes perfectionism everything has to go very well very right so you're programmed to be anxious and stressed all the time you have a system in your mind that is trying to protect you from this stress What is the way to protect yourself by relaxing but you won't relax you see because if you are active if you are doing something that can grow that can be successful Oh my God everyone will see me oh my God I'm going to fail oh my God you find a way to make a mistake you make a mistake because when you finally make the mistake your system does like this oh there you see Did you know that I I was going to make a mistake so you relax the teacher Gaspareto he gave an example once that I always remember Turn and Move I talk about this example here in some videos he said that he was so afraid of crashing but so afraid of crashing when he got his driver's license he was driving thinking Oh my God I hope I don't crash Oh my God I hope I don't crash Oh my God I hope I don't crash the car chronically programmed to feel stress that when he crashed the car he said oh oh you understand you understand that everyone has experienced something like this okay everyone has experienced something like this oh I know that girl is going to dump me if I get to her I know why no one wants me because I'm horrible ugly no one wants me I don't have money I 'm a guy go there and get the fuck out you say okay I'm the one Loser that I knew I was Then you relax you stay calm it seems crazy but it's not because I know you caught a moment in your life when you saw yourself doing this so how do you work on it my love you work on it by learning to relax , if it were easy, I'm saying it's easy, I'm showing you point by point of everything that causes it, right, the blockage of Success and cresus, how it works and the treatment, okay, I'm giving you the recipe here, the prescription book So it's like this if you is one of those people who are looking at crazy things that are making a mistake out of nowhere, it could very well be so that you can finally relax . swearing at me then when the boss goes there and really swears because you did something that was to find relaxation ready then you are relaxed you say oh you see now you also don't need to stress about him swearing at me he has already cursed me already Hi, so you can see that this pyre of what's going to go wrong, what's going to go wrong makes you look for what 's going to go wrong so you can get out of the stress. It's not easier for you to work on that stress .
No, but it is more, it is more productive for you, you feel that you are ready to put your talents in the world to grow and be successful and you want to count on my help, you will then take the deprogramming of limiting beliefs course.