Jon Stewart on Trump’s Inauguration and Elon Musk's Nazi Salute | The Daily Show

Welcome to The Daily Show uh my name is uh hold on my name is my name is John Stewart I'm your host on this most historic Vibe shift of day uh Donald J Trump the 45th president of the United States a man who's licentious and felonious Behavior has been well cataloged and documented returned to the capital rotunda just four short years after inspiring in that very place a day of Rio shik returned to the exact same room now generally If This Were a dateline documentary he would return to that room to express a form of

repentance and maturity and acknowledgement of the pain that had been wrought on that terrible day but in this show that we're filming now it's to be sworn in as the 47th president of the United States and as with most returning to the scene of the crime it began with tea with the people you tried to steal it from a short time ago President Joe Biden greeted Mr and Mrs Trump at the White House for tea an inaugural tradition always important to keep up the tea tradition when you you hand over the keys to I'm sorry

what did you call them Hitler but got to be a good host hey the Wi-Fi password is White House but I Chang the ID to of one I hope that's not weird I'm not saying Biden should have done his own Insurrection but there's got to be a happy medium between storming the capital and would you like a crumpet but everyone showed up yes it's the Supreme Court taxiing in oh please they're taxing in like the private jets some of them take to caged pheasant hunts all very legal and America's illustrious Senators like Amy kashar and

Deb fiser and of course hakee Jeff were there and fedman was are you come on fman really I shorts it's not even inaugural decorum thing it's Fu freezing out there it's a it's a health concern fetman fetman is literally America's teenage son it's your grandma's funeral I told you I don't like long pants fine be cold even the president's family attended most of whom didn't have to be warned not not to do that weird thing with their hands don't hey hey hey don't don't do it with your hands can you just be normal for a

day what was he doing literally like look at my dick H what no okay okay but not to worry also attending were all those people who warned Americans to shun this WABE fascist dictator called Trump look at me ma oh let's go see Hitler and get a quick selfie first hello look at this a quick one for the Graham yes former president Obama was there George Bush seemed kind of there definitely High even Mike Pence showed up I guess to let the crowd finish the job [Applause] [Music] only Michelle Obama seemed to have the consistent

ethical stance of saying when they go low I stay the I don't care I am staying of course Jill Biden was there making the Strategic choice of keeping her purse on which as you know is the international symbol of I've got to goid but the award for most useful fashion accessory went to the ever stylish Melania Trump whose Audrey heern esque shapo or head clo as it's called doubled as an effective [Applause] if you don't control your borders you don't have a head meanwhile many dignitaries went not only hatless but hairless with a plethora of

stocky bald billionaires who all seem to go to the same biohack life extension clinic and say give me the Lex Luthor yes taking the place of seats normally reserved for Democratic or republican Governors s Zuck Bezos Tim Cook Elon Tic Tac guy Google guy the six guys who control maybe 20% of the world's wealth and 100% of your [Applause] nudes you don't need to pretend with me I don't know know what he's talking about delete delete delete populism ladies and gentlemen shouldn't this Gathering be happening in a volcano's Lair near Zurich or are we just

open- Source Illuminati Now where's the conspiracy Fund in that honestly there is not a useful app of communication not controlled by at least one of these individuals and you may not be concerned that they've all ponied up a million dollar to be sitting there and are kissing the ass of a president who openly threatens non- ass kissers but trust me shit's going to get weird even by that afternoon got weird disappearance of Elon Musk at an early trunk rally is getting loads of attention because of a one-armed gesture he made this one really mattered and

I just want to say thank you for making it happen thank you okay uh charitably I'm going to say that was just an awkward my heart goes out to you gesture any of you might have done it like this you know even Taylor Swift has done that you know my heart but she almost almost never does the goes out to you like just always stays with but you know listen it's nerve-wracking day uh you're not normally a public speaker it's a oneoff gesture please try not to use it [Applause] again son of a you really

want to make sure the people in the back see it I guess I'm just going to be generous and say maybe that was elon's attempt at dabbing on the haters I don't by the way do people still dab on haters is that was that a very old man okay wasn't wasn't that a thing at one time no I think I think it's important in these troubled times to continue to dab on the haters but don't be concerned that these Tech Titans control Google and Tik Tok and WhatsApp and Instagram and x and any other way

that we communicate in the year of Our Lord 2025 because you know they're not going to censor us and it doesn't matter anyway because I know in my heart we don't need any of them because we'll always have you messenger pigeon no no how dare you sir why messenger pigeon why would you turn on me I let you live in a cage on my roof surrounded by your own do you know I asked them to make that animation at like 5 o'l tonight literally with everything else going on in the show and I was literally

like could you make me a pigeon doing this and they were just like sure anyway then it was time for the swearing in on the kind of on the Bible yes it turns out Trump didn't actually put his hand on the Bible obviously because one or the other would burst into flames perhaps both and so ladies and gentlemen the torch has been passed from Biden to Trump yes the torch has been passed to the same generation of Americans let's hear from the 47th president Fresh Off The warm embrace of a tea ceremony with his predecessor

my recent election is a mandate to completely and totally reverse a horrible betrayal and all of these many betrayals that have taken place he's right behind you luckily I don't think he can hear you yes the inaugural speech followed the American tradition of a passive aggressive transfer of power the incoming president gets the completely on the outgoing president in front of that President and hopefully his spouse in recent years our nation has suffered greatly record inflation trying to socially engineer race and gender disastrous invasion of our country is a radical and corrupt establishment vicious violent

and unfair weaponization from this moment on America's decline is [Applause] over this is a tumultuous time in American history filled with much uncertainty and trepidation but it is very difficult for me to not in any way take the bait of the way he said dickline it it really did sound like he said our dick line like the line of our dick so you can see America's dick line I mean how are you going to end our dick line with a tuck or a full reassignment or is this more about fetterman's shorts what what about our

dick line I am I am a child but as bad as things were guess what folks Daddy's home it's about to get a whole lot better the Golden Age of America begins right now from this day forward our country will flourish the American dream will soon be back and thriving like never before we will win like never before we will be a rich Nation again we will bring prices down fill our strategic reserves up again we will drill baby drill oh I think I just saw lady Vance's [Applause] dickline drill baby drill but for all

the days Eerie energy one thing stood out to America's Watchdogs of democracy we have watched as the 47th president of the United States has been sworn in a Cornerstone of democracy this is the true transfer of power here of the current president and the former president making this walk this process um is what distinguishes the United States from a lot of other parts of the world yeah it's all just normal it's just another day it's all just normal transfer power we're just going to play along like all this theater is normal oh except there was

one thing that might have given the game away with just 20 minutes or so left in his presidency we've just gotten word from President Biden that he is pardoning his brothers their wives his sister of family members he says that he is doing this because baseless and politically motivated investigations wreak havoc on the lives of individuals it's all just normal first of all Biden you're at the inauguration did you autoschedule your Pardons and second of all what the man you're just pardoning your whole F it's not a great look yeah like any good captain as

the ship is going down Biden gave the order that Lifeboat is for my family the rest of you can do just like a kind of Jack and Rose thing one on one off 50/50 shot who gives a Biden Audy so the takeaway of this entire day was a man who tried to overthrow the government has been peacefully handed the Reigns of power and the outgoing president has started a new tradition of blanket pardoning everyone in his orbit the two men creating a magnificent snake sucking its own dick cycle of no accountability and then of course

we end with the grand [Music] [Applause] finale the attack on Greenland has begun yeah what are you going to do for more on the day's events we go out to the best news team in the country starting at the capital with Michael C Desi Li it bringing it Michael C I'm GNA start with you my friend uh what What's the mood over there at the inaugural parties tonight John it's incredible Donald Trump hasn't even been president for one whole day but already unemployed employment is down gas is low my vertical jump increased half an inch

and the stock market is soaring yeah I think I mean obviously a lot of that economic stuff was happening before noon today so I don't I don't think so also Trump made eggs cheap again I mean we can eat 10 20 30 of these a day John they're literally selling them by the Dozen my albumin levels are soring Desi liic you're down there as well you've been covering uh blue Washington as it were John I'm with the hash resistance and they are appalled by what they're seeing the executive orders the renaming of military bases oh

they they've already renamed the bases after Confederate generals no Hitler it's just Fort Hitler now it's over overwhelming John all right well try and stay safe out there Desi and uh John if I could say something I'm I'm sorry yeah Josh Johnson are you where are you I'm at the Martin Luther King memorial today was also MLK day there was a March honoring a man that represented the best about America just wanted to put that out there okay fantastic good to keep in mind John John John can I interrupt uh yes Michael I just thought

of some more egg stuff egg salad egg creams eggnog Yanni eggs eggplants thank to Trump these things are now super cheap and the best part about eggs John they never expire that's definitely not true Michael that's okay well we'll see what the new secretary of Health and Human Services has to say about that right after he legalized his raw milk you know speaking of the letters M L and [Laughter] K let me tell you about someone else we should be celebrating today black guy preacher and he talked a lot like this uh the the the

black guy from the movie Selma no well yeah but no no John I I have an update from resistance headquarters that the Cheetos man is not going to like uh yes Desi do initiatives is there another March not going to be necessary I'm hearing Rachel M is coming back five days a week and when she Compares what's happening now to the Shay's rebellion of 1787 woo boy I would not want to be Trump EXC excuse me I'm sorry Grace Co and Tren we're being recognized again what why are you dressed like a caveman and a

robot hm oh we were under studies for the Village People yeah yeah if the copper Native American get sick then caveman and robots step in well aren't you guys a little like ashamed at all about performing at the Trump inauguration or do we look like we're capable of Shame John besides this is fun much like it's fun to stay at the YCA yeah that's you know where it's not fun to stay how do we how do he do that it's not fun to stay at a Birmingham Jail yeah Josh can't we just talk about this

some other day it is literally the day to talk about it damn it am I the only one who thinks it'sing crazy that Martin Luther King day is happening at the same time that Trump is taking power a man who staged violent resistance is being rewarded with power to the diminishment of our greatest nonviolent resistance leader this cannot hold um uh and it won't it's just been renamed Martin Luther Trump day so best news team everybody [Music]