3 years ago I received a letter that changed everything I remember staring at my computer screen while my brain was trying to process what I had written and my heart was pounding somewhere in my throat drowning out the surrounding sounds my fingers trembled as I reread the lines over and over fearing it was a mistake or someone's malicious joke congratulations on your promotion to senior marketing director these words froze in front of my eyes as if someone had etched on a monitor it took me a moment to notice that the next line showed a new
salary but when my eyes finally got to that figure a muffled sigh escaped my mouth the amount was almost twice what I had earned before I was sitting in my small cramped room which looked more like a cubicle than a full-fledged home surrounded by stacks of documents an old laptop and cups with dried remnants of coffee like many of my peers I struggle to make ends meet paying off student loans counting pennies for rent and having to share an apartment with a neighbor every trip to a cafe or a spontaneous dinner with friends had to
be carefully planned so as not to exceed the budget my name is Rachel I was born and raised in Ohio in a middleclass family with my parents Tom and Linda and my older sister Kate Kate has been married to David for a long time and they have two children Emma and Jack we were never rich but but my parents always tried to make sure my sister and I had everything we needed and I appreciated their efforts even if sometimes it meant that we had to save for something the first thing I did when I could
speak was grab my phone and dial my mom's number Mom you won't believe this my voice trembled with emotion as she answered Rachel what happened there was concern in her voice but I hurried to reassure her I got a promotion senior marketing director the salary mom you can't imagine how much higher it is there was a short pause on the other end of the line and then I heard a cheer oh honey that's amazing I'm so proud of you her voice was trembling with emotion you're coming this weekend aren't you we need to celebrate this
I couldn't refuse that evening I bought a bus ticket and two days later I found myself at my two-story house where I spent my childhood when I went inside they were already waiting for me Kate and David had arrived earlier and now their children were running around the backyard squealing with delight the aroma of homemade lasagna was in the air mixed with the smell of fresh garlic bread we sat down at the table and I talked about my new role the projects I would be overseeing and shared my thoughts about the future my family seemed
genuinely happy for me and it filled me with warmth during dinner mom filled everyone's glasses with wine and looking up said with a smile you know I've been thinking about having a real Thanksgiving this year not just us but Uncle Jim and Aunt Barbara maybe even cousin Steve and his family that's a great idea mom I said taking a sip of wine the only thing she hesitated her voice becoming a little less confident because of all these extra people I would like to cook something special I found a recipe for ribs in a cooking magazine
it's just great but it needs expensive ingredients and special cheeses for snacks she didn't finish but I didn't have to I immediately understood where she was going how much do you need I asked without hesitation oh it's it's only about $250 mom said with a slight relief in her voice no problem I'll transfer them to you tomorrow I replied feeling an almost childish sense of Pride that I could now help my family without harming myself Thanksgiving was a great success mom beamed accepting compliments for the ribs and cheese plate and I enjoyed the feeling that
I was able to make it possible then Christmas came Rachel honey I want to cook something special for a festive dinner mom's voice sounded cheerful on the phone this time it will be something absolutely amazing of course mom what did you come up with I have some great recipes but the ingredients are expensive she laughed as if embarrassed but I already knew what would happen next the amount increased to $300 at Easter $ 350 on the 4th of July mom has planned a grand barbecue in the backyard I got used to these conversations they became
something natural and I didn't see it as a problem I was making good money and it seemed right to help my parents but by Thanksgiving next year something had changed mom didn't call with a request anymore I just got a message hi honey I'm planning a Thanksgiving dinner meeting $800 translated by Friday I love you I froze staring at the screen 800 it wasn't a request it was a statement I felt something tighten inside me but then I Shrugged and made the translation during dinner I noticed something else new and it made me pause for
a moment with a fork in my hand staring intently at the contents of my plate the food no longer looked the same as usual instead of the usual homemade dishes prepared by my mother there were Exquisite snacks neatly arranged on trays in front of us which looked like they were made by professional chefs there were miniature pies with goat cheese tartlets with smoked salmon tiny portions of risotto neatly served in Glass glasses all this seemed clearly alien among the usual meat casseres mashed potatoes and fragrant homemade bread that I used to see in my parents
house mom these snacks are amazing I said bringing a small spoonful of delicious mousse to my lips a new recipe I asked this question knowing full well that I already knew the answer but I wanted to hear it from her oh I ordered them at that new place downtown she waved her hand as if it didn't matter at all no one has time to cook everything from scratch anymore besides they do it better than I ever could she added with a slight smile taking a sip of wine I didn't know what to say to that
it would seem that what is strange here after all many people prefer to buy food rather than spend hours cooking complex meals but something in her tone in the way she said it so easily as if it were a matter of course caused me to have an unpleasant feeling in my chest it was not the Cozy family dinner it once was something has changed winter turned to Spring and then summer again and I noticed how our family gatherings became more and more intricate as the guest lists grew as the menu became more complicated and the
costs associated with all this increased at an alarming rate with each holiday mom cooked less and less and restaurants and catering services appeared in our house more and more often messages about money began to arrive not only on big holidays but also just like that without explanations without requests but rather in the form of dry instructions I got used to these requirements and although sometimes I had an unpleasant feeling in my stomach after sending another transfer I didn't allow myself to think about it for too long money came and went it was normal I bought
a new car moved into a more spacious beautiful apartment and enjoyed the feeling of Independence and success but at the same time I noticed that my savings were not growing as fast as they should have given my salary 3 weeks before Thanksgiving I went to my parents house for dinner Kate David and their children were already there when I arrived the house was full of the usual noise children were running around the rooms laughing and arguing mom was busy in the kitchen dad was sitting in the living room looking through the newspaper and Kate and
David were having an animated conversation about something after hugging and exchanging news we finally sat down at the table and Mom pouring wine into glasses casually said well we're going all out for Thanksgiving this year I stopped with a fork in my hand and looked at her frowning slightly what does that mean well she continued smiling I want to invite the whole family Uncle Jim and Aunt Barbara all the cousins even great Aunt Mildred that sounds nice I said helping myself to green beans Kate and I have already planned the menu mom continued to speak
as if it had already been decided and was not subject to discussion we're going to order everything at that new upscale catering restaurant they're making an amazing presentation I slowly put down my Fork order everything yes Kate said Mom and I have already calculated all the expenses that would be about $33,000 I almost choked on my green beans 3,000 I repeated trying to process what I just heard yes Mom said as if we were discussing something as insignificant as the cost of a loaf of bread at the supermarket I also invited cousin Steve and his
family to stay with us but they can't afford train tickets I slowly looked up so what well Mom Shrugged I told them that you would pay for their their roundtrip expenses I blinked feeling a cold wave of irritation rise inside me that's another, Kate kindly clarified so that makes a total of 4,000 I looked from one to the other trying to figure out if they were serious right now but their expressions left no doubt 4,000 I repeated feeling like everything was boiling Inside Yes dear Mom smiled at me as if she had just asked me
to buy milk on the way home I put my Fork down on the table and taking a deep breath said in a flat voice I'm not paying $4,000 for Thanksgiving there was silence the looks of the shocked people at the table might have seemed funny if they weren't directed at me Kate slowly put down her fork looking at me as if she saw me for the first time Rachel you always pay for the holidays she said sounding puzzled as if I just announced that I wasn't going to celebrate Christmas anymore that's how we do everything
now don't complicate the situation Rachel mom said my name in the tone I remembered from childhood the way she used to say it when she was disappointed and ready to lecture I already promised Steve that we will pay for his tickets I jerked my head up I've booked a table at the restaurant she added something snapped inside me it's not my problem I said feeling the anger bubbling up inside me bursting out you should have asked me before making promises with my money I looked at the screen of my phone at the festively set table
at The Smiling Faces of my relatives at the living room of my parents house familiar to the smallest detail and something inside me was slowly but surely emptying me from the inside as if someone was twisting my soul leaving nothing but a cold voice the words in the caption under the photo these deliberately warm words imbued with artificial sincerity pierced me sharper than any knife those who really value family so I don't appreciate it so I'm not a family I was crossed out excluded banished and all because I refused to pay for this table for
this meeting for the opportunity to be among them I waited for the pain to subside for the first blow of betrayal to pass but the longer I looked at this photo the deeper it dug into my heart leaving deep wounds there I swiped my finger across the screen zoomed in on the image peering into the faces of the people who have been closest to me all my life there was my mother with the same familiar smile that had always seemed warm to me but now seemed somehow alien there's Kate looking full of smug satisfaction and
next to her David looking a little tense but certainly not not so tense as to go against the general Trend dad who once protected me from even the smallest childhood insults sat with his usual serious expression on his face as if the whole situation did not concern him they all looked happy without me I felt a lump rise in my throat and I quickly closed the app throwing the phone on the couch as if it were a hot coal but the image was already imprinted in my mind I replayed over and over in my head
the moment of our last dinner when my father called me selfish for the first time when my mother gave me an ultimatum when Kate my aunt sister agree with her without a single hesitation as if it were something self-evident what about me I just left and they let me go I got up from the sofa feeling my hands tremble went into the kitchen and automatically turned on the kettle although I didn't want tea at all I just didn't know what else to do how to deal with the sticky heavy feeling of rejection that was suffocating
me from the inside out I couldn't even imagine that Thanksgiving would be so empty so cold so alien several hours have passed the day turned to evening and the city outside lit up with thousands of lights but I didn't move just sat with my hands wrapped around the mug and stared at one point until the phone vibrated again I shuddered grabbed it hoping for what what for a late invitation an apology it was a new photo from Kate I opened it even though I already knew what I was going to see the children were playing
in the living room adults were sitting around them and this time the caption read how much I love my family I couldn't stand it anger flared up in me instantly a hot wave sweeping away everything in its path my fingers typed a message by the El so I'm not a family anymore I sent it to Kate and immediately felt my heart tighten in anticipation of a response a few seconds passed then a minute the reply came quickly as if she was waiting for me to write Rachel you made your own choice I read these words
and couldn't believe that my sister my own person could say such a thing to me did I make the choice myself yes I did I chose not to pay for other people's holidays I chose not to be treated like a wallet but does that mean I chose to be alone does that mean I deserve to be crossed out I wanted to say something but I couldn't think of the right words I just stared at the screen until anger gave way to desperate heavy disappointment a couple of minutes later I received another message from my mom
I'm really sorry that you didn't want to be with us on this day I I hope you will understand that family is all about sacrifice and compromise I let out a short bitter laugh sacrifices and compromises I wonder why all the sacrifices have to come for me I turned off my phone and tossed it aside feeling tired as if the whole day was dragging me down like a weight too heavy to carry fireworks exploded outside the window multicolored flashes reflected in the glass but for me this holiday day was over before it even started I
got up went to the bedroom lay down on the bed and closed my eyes but sleep wouldn't come I thought about how many times I had turned a blind eye to their requests to their expectations to their need for me not as a daughter not as a sister but as a convenient Financial resource and how many times have I convinced myself that this is normal that this is what good relatives do but now lying in a dark room all alone I want wondered if they had ever really needed me or just my money I flipped
through the comments feeling a strange mix of emotions from sincere joy for myself to a better Taste of regret that did not want to go away despite all my efforts my friends were genuinely happy for me my relatives those who remained on my side congratulated me but there was not a word from my parents and sister I didn't even expect them to write anything but the part of me that had hoped for reconcil ilation until the last moment still felt a painful pang when not a single one of them appeared among the hundreds of comments
I closed my phone and tried to distract myself by sorting through the boxes the new apartment was spacious and bright with large Windows facing directly onto the park where the first spring trees were already blooming filling the air with the sweet scent of fresh foliage and moist Earth after the recent rain I imagined how I would arrange the furniture what paintings I would hang on the walls how in the morning I would go out on the balcony with a cup of coffee and look at the city coming to life it was my place my space
my life two days before the housewarming party I received my first unexpected message from Kate it was short without greetings without unnecessary words did you really buy a new apartment I stared at the screen rereading the question feeling a strange unpleasant feeling growing inside like a premonition of something inevitable I wanted to ignore the message but something made me reply yes I bought it the answer came almost instantly I'm just surprised I thought you were saving up for something more important I frowned feeling a slight wave of annoyance what was that supposed to mean what
could be more important than investing in your own home in your own future it's important to me I I wrote back and no further messages were received from her but a couple of hours later I got a call from my mother Rachel her voice was even too even as if she had memorized every word in advance did you really buy an apartment yes I gripped the phone tighter anticipating where this conversation was going it was unexpected there was tension in my mother's voice barely perceptible but I knew her well enough to notice didn't you think
it would be better to discuss this with your family discuss it I asked feeling the familiar wave of anger Rising inside me why on Earth would I need to discuss buying my house with someone who didn't even wish me a happy birthday Mom paused I could almost hear her inhaling deeply choosing her words Rachel you've always been part of the family she began and I almost laughed we just didn't expect you to make such a big financial decision without us and since when do you care about my financial decisions my voice was sharper than I'd
intended oh yeah it used to be important to you when it came to paying for holidays and travel tickets don't start she cut me off and I could imagine her lips pressing into a thin line it's just are you sure you can pull off the mortgage maybe you should have consulted with your your father first I closed my eyes taking a deep breath before answering I'm a grown woman mom I earned this money I calculated my expenses I made an informed decision I don't need to ask permission there was silence on the other end of
the line which lasted so long that I thought she had already hung up but then the mother spoke again and her voice became cooler tougher I hope you understand that now you have any extra money to help your family she said and it wasn't a question I felt my fingers tighten around the phone and a fire of Rage flared up inside me hot and fast that's it I almost laughed but it came out empty devoid of joy is all this concern about my financial situation just a way of telling me that now I can no
longer be your wallet don't turn everything upside down Rachel she replied irritably it's just a decision it changes the Dynamics I clench my teeth in disbelief Dynamics I repeated you mean I don't have to pay for your whims anymore and that bothers you you're being unfair she said sharply we have always supported you and it would be wise if you also thought about your family I shook my head as if she could see me supported I asked again did you you support me by sending back my Christmas presents ignoring my birthday rejecting me when I
first said no Mom didn't say anything you're right I continued feeling my voice tremble treacherously now the Dynamics have really changed and you know I'm glad of that I hung up before she could answer and for a few seconds I just sat there feeling the adrenaline pumping through my blood my heart pounding in my chest and then there was another call I looked at the screen Kate I ignored him then again and again I blocked the number they disowned me when I refused to pay and now that I've invested in myself in my future they've
remembered me again but not because they were bored not because they loved me but because they realized that their financial Source had finally dried up I closed my eyes took a deep breath and exhaled a new chapter a new house a new life the door was still open but it seemed to me that the air in the apartment had become heavier as if stretched to the Limit they really did it they showed up uninvited even though I made it clear that I didn't want them in my house Mom stepped inside first confidently as if it
were her apartment and not mine her gaze swept across the living room assessing the space the way she always did when she came to my house in the past the look of a Hostess deciding what needed fixing sorry we're late she announced loudly as if she was really expected as if I hadn't told her that I didn't want them to come her father followed her silent with a kind of guilty expression on his face that I hadn't seen on him before he muttered hey rat he said avoiding my eyes Kate lingered on the threshold clutching
a bottle of wine in her hands as if this could somehow smooth over what had happened you have a really good place she said softly and there was none of the self assurance in her voice that she usually spoke to me with it sounded almost like a confession almost like a peace offer I was too shocked to say anything right away I automatically took a step back allowing her to enter and then realized that I had made a mistake the guests in the living room fell silent noticing the new arrivals Uncle Jim and Aunt Barbara
cousin Steve my friends from work everyone who had come at my invitation was now watching the scene with awkward tension I turned my gaze to my mother who was standing in the center of the room as if she owned this space do you really think you can just come here like nothing happened my voice was steady but anger was bubbling inside me Mom raised her eyebrows oh Rachel come on she drawled Crossing her arms over her chest were your family shouldn't a family be together at such important moments I felt something explode inside of me
family I grinned feeling the bitter taste on my tongue a family doesn't kick their kids out when they stop paying for parties the family does not return Christmas gifts marked unwanted package my family doesn't ignore birthdays and then suddenly shows up when something good happens in my life the father who had been silent all this time finally spoke we just wanted to see you ratch you said it was a housewarming party I said friends and family I said sharply family those who treat me like a person not like a bank account I saw mom's lips
tighten into a thin line you're acting like an ungrateful girl she said icily I looked at her and suddenly realized that I had power in this conversation they came to me to my house they expected me to give in as always but I was no longer the Rachel who was ready to give up I took a deep breath then pointed at the door go away what Mom frowned as if she couldn't believe her ears you weren't a part of my life when I needed you to be don't try to become a part of it now
there was a tense silence in the room mom sighed heavily and took one last look at me the one that always said you disappointed me and headed for the door the father hesitated as if he wanted to say something but changed his mind Kate stayed the longest Rachel she shook her head but there was a note of something like regret in her voice goodbye Kate I said softly she lowered her eyes and followed her parents out as soon as the door closed behind them there was a sigh of relief in the room Uncle Jim clapped
his hands well I think now we can raise a toast to the real family everyone laughed and for the first time in a long time I felt like I was really free I looked at Uncle Jim feeling the tension being replaced by fatigue heavy and viscous like a wet coat that I had been wearing for too long his words sounded sincere but there was a bitterness in them that made my stomach clench a family shouldn't treat each other like that yes you shouldn't but that's exactly what mine did I looked around the living room which
still had an echo of the recent scene the wine glasses Frozen in the hands of the guests the looks filled with both sympathy and awkwardness the heavy silence in which the discomfort of witnessing someone else's family drama was clearly felt I didn't want my holiday to turn into this but I had no choice my mother always knew how to draw attention to herself and she didn't need permission to make a scene I took a deep breath then clapped my hands trying to lighten the mood well I said trying to make my voice sound like I
think it wasn't the toast I had planned but since it happened let's raise our glasses to a new home a new chapter and most importantly to those who are really there when it matters there was a murmur of approval in the room the tension began to dissipate and gradually the evening was once again filled with conversations laughter warm light and the feeling that this was my home my space my life Uncle Jim clinked his glass with me with a smile then with Aunt Barbara and soon the guests were talking among themselves again the music filled
the apartment and I felt the oppressive weight of the past gradually receding giving way to lightness and even Joy Kate was the only one who didn't disappear into the crowd she was standing against the wall clutching a glass of wine but not taking a sip her gaze swept across the room but invariably returned to me as if she was about to say something but did not dare I hesitated ated part of me wanted to go over and ask her what was on her mind but the other part the one that still hurt from the Betrayal
resisted Kate was my mirror a reminder of what our family could have been like if it hadn't been for greed if it hadn't been for their desire to control my life and my money but before I could make a decision she took a step forward on her own Rachel her voice was low almost inaudable against the background of the Lively conversation in the room can we talk I nodded leading her to the balcony where it was quieter where no one could overhear us she bit her lip as if Gathering her courage then spoke I'm sorry
she said and there was more than simple regret in her voice I I didn't realize how far things had gone I stared at her waiting for her to continue I was mad at you she confessed because it seemed to me that you just turned your back on us when we needed you I didn't see the full picture I didn't realize that M was really manipulating all of this she shook her head staring off into the darkness of the night City and then sighed but now I understand or at least I'm starting to understand I was
silent because Kate's words even though they were what I had wanted to hear for many years could no longer heal Old Wounds it doesn't change everything that happened I finally said but if you really want to understand you have to see for yourself she nodded her gaze was serious adult it no longer had that frivolous confidence with which she always went through life I know we stood there for a few minutes each with her own thoughts then Kate exhaled and smiled softly can I at least stay at the party I looked at her and then
unexpectedly even for myself I grinned only if you bring me another glass of wine she laughed and it was a laugh in which there was no tension only lightness when we returned to the living room the party was already getting back on track Uncle Jim was telling some funny story and the guests were laughing out loud the music filled the apartment again and I suddenly realized that despite all the chaos despite the unexpected visit of my parents despite this conversation with Kate I was happy because finally it was myy place my life and no one
else could take her away from me I put the phone down on the table took a deep breath and exhaled slowly trying to feel the tension go away with the air but despite this there was still a heavy lump in my chest I just did something that I've been thinking about for a long time but I didn't dare I put an end to it cut myself off from these people who were supposed to be my family but turned into a constant source of pain pressure and manipulation on the one hand it was liberating for the
first time in a long time I felt free from their influence no one else could make me feel guilty for just living my life and making my decisions but on the other hand despite all the anger despite the months of resentment there was still bitterness I used to love these people I once believed that family was a support a safety a place to return to at any moment I ran my hand over my face then picked up the coffee mug again which had already started to cool a sip of the better drink helped me collect
my thoughts now that they couldn't contact me anymore what's next I couldn't allow myself to sink into self-pity or doubt I knew I had done the right thing and I needed to move on the phone vibrated again but this time it was a message from Sarah how are you I smiled feeling warmth spread across my chest I still had people who cared about me much better than I expected I replied a couple of minutes later the reply came Megan and I are going to have a drink tonight I glanced at the kitchen clock it was
still early but the prospect of spending the evening with friends talking about everything except family and all this drama seemed incred rly tempting of course I sent a short reply then got up finished the rest of my coffee and went into the shower letting the warm water wash away the remnants of tension I spent the rest of the day sorting through the last boxes I was pleased to put my new home in order arrange things the way I wanted without regard to other people's tastes and expectations it was a strange but Pleasant feeling for the
first time in a long time I felt that this place really belonged to me that no one could come and demand something to change because it was their home too I was sorting through the books arranging them meatly on the Shelf when I heard another message it was Uncle Jim if you ever need support Financial emotional whatever know that you are not alone I smiled as I reread the message several times thank you Uncle Jim you have no idea how much this means to me I replied by the evening I was fully prepared to meet
my friends choosing a simple but comfortable dress and light makeup I felt the remnants of a hard day finally receding giving way to anticipation it was my first evening after the whole story when I could just be myself without having to defend myself justify myself or prove something we met in a small cozy bar which was located near my new apartment Sarah and Megan were already sitting at a table by the window chatting and laughing and when I approached they immediately made room for me how are you feeling Sarah asked when I settled on the
couch and took the first sip of my cocktail I thought about it for a second honestly I said glancing at them better than I expected easier of course it's easier Megan said Crossing her arms you finally stopped carrying that suitcase face without a handle I know but I hesitated choosing my words it's a strange feeling I understand that they were wrong that it hurt me that they treated me unfairly but still they're my parents just because they're your parents doesn't give them the right to treat you like that Sarah said firmly family is not only
about blood these are people who love and respect you who support you rather than take advantage of you I nodded realizing she was right you gave them a chance Megan added you tried to reach out explain but they didn't want it now you have the opportunity to surround yourself with those who truly deserve to be in your life I looked at my friends and smiled thank you I said for what asked Sarah for being with me for reminding me that I'm not alone we clinked glasses and at that moment I felt that maybe everything was
just beginning a new apartment A New Life new boundaries that I set for myself I took a sip of my cocktail and suddenly realized that for the first time in months I felt truly free it's been a month since that last conversation and sometimes I find myself checking my phone half expecting to see a message from one of them that would somehow break the lock whether it's an apology or a confession whatever as long as it means they finally figured out how they were very wrong but there's nothing the silence is as oppressive as before
and I'm still waiting for them to realize that their treatment of me as a walking bank account was wrong that I not just a source of funding for their social aspirations but a real daughter and sister and I hope that one day they will see me as a person not just their own benefit meanwhile life goes on and I've gradually settled into my new apartment making it truly my own with every painting I hang and every plant I take careful care of on my balcony the garden blooms under the Summer sun and I enjoy the
fresh herds for cooking and the vibrant flowers that brighten up my morning my job keeps me busy and satisfied I have embarked on a new marketing campaign that challenges me creatively and brings me recognition from the company's management and the promotion that started this whole family drama turned out to be the success I had hoped for professionally even if it created unexpect ected complications in my personal life life my social calendar remains full and I'm enjoying this new phase Sarah and I started hiking weekends once a month exploring Trails a few hours away from the
city Megan convinced me to join her book club which introduced me to both new literature and new friends and I even went on a few dates nothing serious yet but nevertheless it's fun and Casual Uncle Jim and Aunt Barbara who have always been real supports for me made it a role to include me in small family gatherings trying not to invite my parents to the same events their support meant more to me than they might have realized reinforcing in my mind the idea that a family does not have to be toxic or transactional however the
pain is still there especially on quiet evenings when memories come back unbidden and I miss the family I thought I had before my promotion revealed their true priorities I miss my niece and nephew who are too young to understand why Aunt Rachel is no longer around but the acute pain has gradually turned into bearable and I no longer cry when I see photos of family events on Facebook that I was not invited to and I no longer rehearse arguments in my head thinking about everything what I should have said I've come to terms with my
decision to set boundaries even when those boundaries meant alienating the people I once loved sometimes sitting at my panoramic windows and watching the lights of the city at night I wonder if if they will ever change whether my mother will admit that her behavior was wrong whether my father will find the courage to stand up to her whether Kate will ever understand that her interests are also important but despite I hope they do because they're still my family and part of me is still waiting for them to come back but I'm no longer putting my
life on hold waiting for their approval or acceptance I now know my value and it's not measured in dollars or how much I'm willing to spend to maintain visibility my life is n just a set of requirements to meet or a list of things to do I began to realize that my true strength lies in being myself discovering my desires striving for my dreams and not being afraid to put myself first I've learned to take care of myself in a way that no one else could and that's probably my biggest Victory knowing that in the
end I'm the only one responsible for my happiness and although there are still many challenges ahead of me I am now ready to face them with an open heart knowing that I have the support of true friends and loving relatives behind me and most importantly I Rachel am strong and independent ready to live my life the way I want it