Alice In Wonderland - Full Audiobook

[Applause] [Music] thank you Alice's Adventures in Wonderland by Lewis Carroll read by Nolan hennelly chapter one down the rabbit hole Alice was beginning to get very tired of sitting by her sister on the bank and of having nothing to do once or twice she had peeped into the book her sister was reading but it had no pictures or conversations in it and what is the use of a book thought Alice without pictures or conversations so she was considering in her own mind as well as she could for the hot day made her feel very sleepy

and stupid whether the pleasure of making a daisy chain would be worth the trouble of getting up and picking the daisies when suddenly a white rabbit with pink eyes ran close by her there was nothing so very remarkable in that nor did Alice think it's so very much out of the way to hear the rabbit say to itself oh dear oh dear I shall be late when she thought it over afterwards it occurred to her that she ought to have wondered at this but at the time it all seemed quite natural but when the rabbit

actually took a watch out of its waistcoat pocket and looked at it and then hurried on Alice started to her feet for it flashed across her mind that she had never before seen a rabbit with either a waistcoat pocket or a watch to take out of it and burning with curiosity she ran across the field after it unfortunately was just in time to see it pop down a large rabbit hole under the Hedge in another moment down went Alice after it never once considering how in the world she was to get out again the rabbit

hole went straight on like a tunnel for some way and then dipped suddenly down so suddenly that Alice had not a moment to think about stopping herself before she found herself falling down a very steep well either the well was very deep or she fell very slowly for she had plenty of time as she went down to look about her and to wonder what was going to happen next first she tried to look down and make out what she was coming to but it was too dark to see anything then she looked at the sides

of the well and noticed that they were filled with cupboards and bookshelves here and there she saw maps and pictures hung upon pegs she took down a jar from one of the shelves as she passed it it was labeled orange marmalade but to her great disappointment it was empty she did not like to drop the jar for fear of killing somebody so managed to put it into one of the cupboards as she fell past it well thought Alice to herself after such a fall as this I shall take nothing of tumbling downstairs How brave they'll

all think me at home why I wouldn't say anything about it even if I fell off the top of the house which was very likely true down down down with the fall never come to an end I wonder how many miles I've fallen by this time she said aloud I must be getting somewhere near the center of the Earth let me see that would be four thousand miles down I think for you see Alice had learned several things of this sort in her lessons in the school room and though this was not a very good

opportunity for showing off her knowledge as there was no one to listen to her still it was good practice to say it over yes that's about the right distance but then I wonder what latitude or longitude I've got to Alice had no idea what latitude was or longitude either but thought they were nice Grand words to say presently she began again I wonder if I shall fall right through the Earth how funny it'll seem to come Out Among the people that walk with their heads downward the antipathies I think she was rather glad there was

no one listening this time as it didn't sound at all the right word but I shall have to ask them what the name of the country is you know please ma'am is this New Zealand or Australia and she tried to curtsy as she spoke fancy curtsying as you're falling through the air do you think you could manage it and what an ignorant little girl she'll think me no it'll never do to ask perhaps I shall see it written up somewhere down down down there was nothing else to do so Alice soon began talking again Dino

miss me very much tonight I should think Dinah was the cat I hope they'll remember her saucer of milk at tea time Dynamite dear I wish you were down here with me there are no mice in the air I'm afraid but you might catch a bat and there's very likely a mouse you know but do cats eat bats I wonder and here Alice began to get rather sleepy and went on saying to herself in a dreamy sort of way do cats eat bats do cats eat bats and sometimes do bats eat cats for you see

as she couldn't answer either question it didn't much matter which way she put it she felt that she was dozing off and had just begun to dream that she was walking hand in hand with Dinah and saying to her very earnestly now Dinah tell me the truth did you ever eat a bat when suddenly thump thump down She Came Upon a heap of sticks and dry leaves and the fall was over Alice was not a bit hurt and she jumped up onto her feet in a moment she looked up but it was all dark overhead

before her was another long passage and the White Rabbit was still in sight hurrying down it there was not a moment to be lost away went Alice like the wind and was just in time to hear it say as it turned a corner oh my ears and whiskers how late it's getting she was close behind it when she turned the corner but the rabbit was no longer to be seen she found herself in a long low Hall which was lit up by a row of lamps hanging from the roof there were doors all around the

hall but they were all locked and when Alice had been all the way down one side and up the other trying every door she walked sadly down the middle wondering how she was ever to get out again suddenly She Came Upon a little three-legged table all made of solid glass there was nothing on it except a tiny Golden Key and Alice's first thought was that it might belong to one of the doors of the hall but alas either the locks were too large or the key was too small but at any rate it would not

open any of them however the second time around She Came Upon a low curtain she had not noticed before and behind it was a little door about 15 inches high she tried the little golden key in the lock and to her great Delight it fitted Alice opened the door and found that it led into a small passage not much larger than a rat hole she knelt down and looked along the passage into the loveliest Garden you ever saw how she longed to get out of that dark Hall and wander about among those beds of bright

flowers and those cool fountains but she could not even get her head through the doorway and even if my head would go through thought poor Alice it would be a very little use without my shoulders oh have I wish I could shut up like a telescope I think I could if I only knew how to begin for you see so many out of the way things had happened lately that Alice had begun to think that very few things indeed were really impossible there seemed to be no use in waiting by the little door so she

went back to the table half hoping she might find another key on it or at any rate a book of rules for shutting people up like telescopes this time she found a little bottle on it which certainly was not there before said Alice and round the neck of the bottle was a paper label with the words drink me beautifully printed on it in large letters it was all very well to say drink me but the wise little Alice was not going to do that in a hurry no I'll look first she said and see whether

it's marked poison or not for she had read several nice little histories about children who had got burnt and eaten up by wild beasts and other unpleasant things all because they would not remember the simple rules their friends had taught them such as that a red-hot poker will burn you if you hold it too long and that if you cut your finger very deeply with a knife it usually bleeds and she had never forgotten that if you drink much from a bottle marked poison it is almost certain to disagree with you sooner or later however

this bottle was not marked poison so Alice ventured to taste it and finding it very nice it had in fact a sort of mixed flavor of cherry tart custard pineapple roast turkey toffee and hot buttered toast she very soon finished it off what a curious feeling said Alice I must be shutting up like a telescope and so it was indeed she was now only 10 inches high and her face brightened up at the thought that she was now the right size for going through the little door into that lovely Garden first however she waited for

a few minutes to see if she was going to shrink any further she felt a little nervous about this for it might end you know said Alice to herself in my going out altogether like a candle I wonder what I should be like then and she tried to Fancy with a flame of a candle is like after the candle is blown out for she could not remember ever having seen such a thing after a while finding that nothing more happened she decided on going into the garden at once but alas for poor Alice when she

got to the door she found she had forgotten the little golden key and when she went back to the table for it she found she could not possibly reach it she could see it quite plainly through the glass and she tried her best to climb up one of the legs of the table but it was too slippery and when she had tired herself out with trying the poor little thing sat down and cried come there's no use in crying like that said Alice to herself rather sharply I advise you to leave off this minute she

generally gave herself very good advice though she very seldom followed it and sometimes she scolded herself so severely as to bring tears into her eyes and once she remembered trying to box her own ears for having cheated herself in a game of croquet she was playing against herself for this curious child was very fond of pretending to be two people but it's no use now thought poor Alice to pretend to be two people why there's hardly enough of me left to make one respectable person soon her eye fell on a little glass box that was

lying under the table she opened it and found in it a very small cake on which the words eat me were beautifully marked in currents well I'll eat it said Alice and if it makes me grow larger I can reach the key and if it makes me grow smaller I can creep under the door so either way I'll get into the garden and I don't care which happens she ate a little bit and said anxiously to herself which way which way holding her hand on the top of her head to feel which way it was

growing and she was quite surprised to find that she remained the same size to be sure this generally happens when one eats a cake but Alice had got so much into the way of expecting nothing but out of the way things to happen that it seemed quite dull and stupid for life to go on in the common way so she set to work and very soon finished off the cake chapter 2. the pool of Tears curiouser and curiouser cried Alice she was so much surprised that for the moment she quite forgot how to speak good

English now I'm opening out like the largest telescope that ever was goodbye feet for when she looked down at her feet they seemed to be almost out of sight they were getting so far off oh my poor little feet I wonder who will put on your shoes and stockings for you now dears I'm sure I should be able I shall be a great deal too far off to trouble myself about you you must manage the best way you can but I must be kind to them thought Alice or maybe they won't walk the way I

want to let me see I'll give them a new pair of boots every Christmas and she went on planning to herself how she would manage it they must go by the carrier she thought and how funny it'll seem sending presents to one's own feet and how odd the directions will look Alice's right foot Esquire heartthrog near the fender with Alice's love oh dear what nonsense I'm talking just then her head struck against the roof of the hall in fact she was now more than nine feet high and she at once took up the little golden

key and hurried off to the Garden door poor Alice it was as much as she could do lying down on one side to look through into the garden with one eye but to get through was more hopeless than ever she sat down and began to cry again you ought to be ashamed of yourself said Alice a great girl like you she might well say this to go on crying in this way stop this moment I tell you but she went on all the same shedding gallons of Tears until there was a large pool all around

her about four inches deep and reaching half down the hall after a time she heard a little pattering of feet in the distance and she hastily dried her eyes to see what was coming it was the White Rabbit returning splendidly dressed with a pair of white kid gloves in one hand and a large fan in the other he came trotting along in a great hurry muttering to himself as he came oh The Duchess The Duchess oh won't she be Savage if I kept her waiting Alice felt so desperate that she was ready to ask help

of anyone so when the rabbit came near her she began in a low timid voice uh if you please sir the rabbit started violently dropped the white kid gloves and the fan and scurried away into the darkness as hard as he could go Alice took up the fan and gloves and as the hall was very hot she kept fanning herself all the time she went on talking dear dear how queer everything is today and yesterday things went on just as usual I wonder if I've been changed in the night let me think was I the

same when I got up this morning I almost think I can remember feeling a little different but if I'm not the same the next question is who in the world am I Ah that's the great puzzle and she began thinking over all the children she knew that were of the same age as herself to see if she could have been changed for any of them I'm sure I'm not Ada she said for her hair goes in such long ringlets and mine doesn't go in ringlets at all and I'm sure I can't be Mabel for I

know all sorts of things and she oh she knows such a very little besides she's she and I'm I and oh dear how puzzling it all is I'll try if I know all the things I Used to Know let me see four times five is twelve and four times six is thirteen and four times seven is oh dear I shall never get to 20 at that rate however the multiplication table doesn't signify let's try geography London is the capital of Paris and Paris is the capital of Rome and Rome no that's all wrong I'm certain

I must have been changed for Mabel I'll try and say how goth the little and she crossed her hands on her lap as if she were saying lessons and began to repeat it but her voice sounded hoarse and strange and the words did not come the same as they used to how doth the Little Crocodile improve his shining tale and pour the Waters of the Nile on every golden scale how cheerfully he seems to grin how neatly spread his claws and welcome little fishes in with gently smiling Jaws oh I'm sure those are not the

right words said poor Alice and her eyes filled with tears again as she went on I must be Mabel after all and I shall have to go on and live in that pokey little house and have next and no toys to play with and oh ever so many lessons to learn no I've made up my mind about it if I'm Mabel I'll stay down here it'll be no use they're putting their heads down and saying come up again dear I shall only look up and say who am I then tell me first and then if

I like being that person I'll come up if not I'll stay down here till I'm somebody else but oh dear cried Alice with a sudden burst of tears I do wish they would put their heads down I'm so very tired of being all alone here as she said this she looked down at her hands and was surprised to see that she had put on one of the rabbit's little white kid gloves while she was talking how can I have done that she thought oh I must be growing small again she got up and went to

the table to measure herself by it and found that as nearly as she could guess she was now about two feet high and was going on shrinking rapidly she soon found out that the cause of this was the fan she was holding and she dropped it hastily just in time to avoid shrinking away all together that was a narrow Escape said Alice a good deal frightened at the sudden change but very glad to find herself still in existence and now for the garden and she ran with all speed back to the little door but alas

the little door was shut again and the little golden key was lying on the glass table as before and things are worse than ever thought the poor child fry never was so small as this before never and I declare it's too bad that it is as she said these words her foot slipped and in another moment Splash she was up to her chin in salt water her first idea was that she had somehow fallen into the sea and in that case I can go back by Railway she said to herself Alice had been to the

seaside once in her life and had come to the general conclusion that wherever you go to on the English Coast you find a number of bathing machines in the sea some children digging in the sand with wooden Spades then a row of lodging houses and behind them a railway station however she soon made out that she was in the pool of Tears which she had wept when she was nine feet high wish I hadn't cried so much said Alice as she swam about trying to find her way out I shall be punished for it now

I suppose by being drowned in my own tears that will be a queer thing to be sure however everything is queer today just then she heard something splashing about in the pool a little way off and she swam nearer to make out what it was At first she thought it must be a walrus or a hippopotamus but then she remembered how small she was now and she soon made out that it was only a mouse that had slipped in like herself would it be of any use now thought Alice to speak to this mouse everything

is so out of the way down here that I should think very likely it can talk at any rate there's no harm in trying so she began oh Mouse do you know the way out of this pool I'm very tired of swimming about here oh Mouse Alice thought this must be the right way of speaking to a mouse she had never done such a thing before but she remembered having seen in her brother's Latin grammar a mouse of a mouse to a mouse a Mouse a mouse the mouse looked at her rather inquisitively and seemed

to her to wink with one of its little eyes but it said nothing perhaps it doesn't understand English thought Alice I dare say it's a French Mouse come over with William the Conqueror for with all her knowledge of History Alice had no very clear notion how long ago anything had happened so she began again which was the first sentence in her french lesson book the mouse gave a sudden leap out of the water and seemed to quiver all over with fright oh I beg your pardon cry to Alice hastily afraid that she had hurt the

poor animals feelings I quite forgot you don't like cats not like cats cried the mouse in a shrill passionate voice would you like cats if you were me well perhaps not said Alice in a soothing tone don't be angry about it and yet I wish I could show you our cat Dinah I think you'd take a fancy to cats if you could only see her she is such a dear quiet thing Alice went on half to herself as she swam lazily about in the pool and she sits purring so nicely by the fire licking her

paws and washing her face and she is such a nice soft thing to nurse and she's such a Capital One for catching mice oh I beg your pardon cried Alice again for this time the mouse was bristling all over and she felt certain it must be really offended we won't talk about her anymore if you'd rather not we indeed cried the mouse who was trembling down to the end of his tail as if I would talk on such a subject our family always hated cats nasty low vulgar things don't let me hear the name again

I won't indeed said Alice in a great hurry to change the subject of conversation are you are you fond of of dogs the mouse did not answer so Alice went on eagerly there is such a nice little dog near our house I should like to show you a little bright-eyed Terrier you know with oh such long curly brown hair and it'll fetch things when you throw them and it'll sit up and beg for its dinner and all sorts of things I can't remember half of them and it belongs to a farmer you know and he

says it's so useful it's worth a hundred pounds he says it kills all the rats and oh dear cried Alice in a sorrowful tone I'm afraid I've offended it again for the mouse was swimming away from her as hard as it could go and making quite a commotion in the pool as it went so she called softly after it mouse deer do come back again and we won't talk about cats or dogs either if you don't like them when the mouse heard this it turned round and swam slowly back to her its face was quite

pale with passion Alice thought and it said in a low trembling voice let us get to the shore and I'll tell you my history and you'll understand why it is I hate cats and dogs it was high time to go for the pool was getting quite crowded with the birds and animals that had fallen into it there were a duck and a Dodo a lorry and an eaglet and several other curious creatures Alice led the way and the whole party swam to the shore chapter 3 a caucus race and a long tail they were indeed

a queer looking party that assembled on the bank the birds with draggled feathers the animals with their fur clinging close to them and all dripping wet cross and uncomfortable the first question of course was how to get dry again they had a consultation about this and after a few minutes it seemed quite natural to Alice to find herself talking familiarly with them as if she had known them all her life indeed she had quite a long argument with the Lorry who at last turned sulcally and would only say I am older than you and must

know better and this Alice would not allow without knowing how old it was and as the Lorry positively refused to tell its age there was no more to be said at last the mouse who seemed to be a person of authority among them called out sit down sit down all of you and listen to me I'll soon make you dry enough they all sat down at once in a large ring with the mouse in the middle Alice kept her eyes anxiously fixed on it for she felt sure she would catch a bad cold if she

did not get dry very soon said the mouse with an important heir are you all ready this is the driest thing I know Sirens all around if you please William the Conqueror whose cause was favored by the pope was soon submitted Dubai the English who wanted leaders and had been of late much accustomed to usurpation and Conquest Edward and Mork are the Earls of America and northumbria said the Lorry with a shiver I beg your pardon said the mouse frowning but very politely did you speak not I said the Lorry hastily I thought you did

said the mouse I proceed Edwin and morikar the Earls of America and northumbria declared for him and even stigand the Patriotic Archbishop of Canterbury found it advisable found what said the duck found it the mouse replied rather crossly of course you know what it means I know what it means well enough when I find a thing said the duck it's generally a frog or a worm the question is what did the Archbishop find the mouse did not notice this question but hurriedly went on found it advisable to go with Edgar aetholing to meet William and

offer him the crown Williams conduct at first was moderate but the insolence of his Normans how are you getting on now my dear it continued turning to Alice as it spoke as wet as ever said Alice in a Melancholy tone it doesn't seem to dry me at all in that case said the dodo solemnly rising to its feet I move that the meeting adjourn for the immediate adoption of more energetic remedies speak English said the eaglet I don't know the meaning of half those long words and what's more I don't believe you do either and

the eaglet bent down its head to hide a smile some of the other birds tittered audibly what I was going to say said the dodo in an offended tone was it the best thing to get us dry would be a caucus race what is a caucus race said Alice not that she wanted much to know but the dodo had paused as if it thought that somebody ought to speak and no one else seemed inclined to say anything why said the dodo the best way to explain it is to do it and as you might like

to try the thing yourself some winter day I will tell you how the dodo Managed IT first it marked out a race course in a sort of circle the exact shape doesn't matter it said and then all the party were placed along the course here and there there was no one two three in a way but they began running when they liked and left off when they liked however when they had been running half an hour or so and were quite dry again the dodo suddenly called out the race is over and they all crowded

round it panting and asking but who has won this question the dodo could not answer without a great deal of thought and it sat for a long time with one finger pressed upon its forehead the position in which you usually see Shakespeare in the picture of him while the rest waited in silence at last the dodo said everybody has won and all must have prizes but who is to give the prizes quite a chorus of voices asked why she of course said the dodo pointing to Alice with one finger and the whole party at once

crowded around her calling out in a confused way prizes prizes Alice have no idea what to do and in despair she put her hand in her pocket and pulled out a box of comfits luckily the saltwater had not got into it and handed them round as prizes there was exactly one piece all round but she must have a prize herself you know said the mouse of course the dodo replied very Gravely what else have you got in your pocket he went on turning to Alice only a thimble said Alice sadly handed over here said the

dodo then they all crowded round her once more while the dodo solemnly presented the thimble saying we beg your acceptance of this elegant thimble and when it had finished this short speech they all cheered Alice thought the whole thing very absurd but they all looked so grave that she did not dare to laugh and as she could not think of anything to say she simply bowed and took the thimble looking as solemn as she could the next thing was to eat the Comforts this caused some noise and confusion as the large birds complained that they

could not taste theirs and the small ones choked and had to be padded on the back however it was over at last and they sat down again in a ring and begged the mouse to tell them something more you promised to tell me your history you know said Alice and why is it you hate C and D she added in a whisper half afraid that it would be offended again mine is a long and sad tale said the mouse turning to Alice and zying it is a long tail certainly said Alice looking down with Wonder

at the mouse's tail but why do you call it sad and she kept on puzzling about it while the mouse was speaking so that her idea of the tale was something like this Fury said to a mouse that he met in the house let us both go to law I will prosecute you come I'll take no denial we must have a trial for really this morning I have nothing to do said the mouth to the Cur such a trial Dear Sir with no jury or judge would be wasting our breath I'll be judge I'll be

jury said cunning old Fury I'll try the whole cause and condemn you to death you are not attending said the mouse to Alice severely what are you thinking of I beg your pardon said Alice very humbly you had got to the fifth Bend I think I had not cried the mouth sharply and very angrily anat said Alice always ready to make herself useful and looking anxiously about her oh do let me help to undo it I shall do nothing of the sort said the mouse getting up and walking away you insult me by talking such

nonsense I didn't mean it pleaded poor Alice but you're so easily offended you know the mouse only growled in reply please come back and finish your story Alice called after it and the others all joined in chorus oh yes please do but the mouse only shook its head impatiently and walked a little quicker what a Pity it wouldn't stay inside the Lorry as soon as it was quite out of sight and an old crab took the opportunity of saying to her daughter ah my dear let this be a lesson to you never to lose your

temper hold your tongue ma said the young crab a little snappishly you're enough to try the patience of an oyster I wish I had our diner here I know I do said Alice aloud addressing nobody in particular sheets soon fetch it back and who is Dinah if I might venture to ask the question said the Lorry Alice replied eagerly for she was always ready to talk about her pet Dinah's our cat and she's such a Capital One for catching mice you can't think and I wish you could see her after the birds why she'll eat

a little bird as soon as look at it this speech caused a remarkable sensation among the party some of the birds hurried off at once one old Magpie began wrapping itself up very carefully remarking I really must be getting home the night air doesn't suit my throat and a canary called out in a trembling voice to its children come away call away my dears it's high time you were all in bed on various pretexts they all moved off and Alice was soon left alone I wish I hadn't mentioned Dinah she said to herself in a

Melancholy tone nobody seems to like her down here and I'm sure she's the best cat in the world oh my dear Dinah I wonder if I shall ever see you anymore and here poor Alice began to cry again for she felt very lonely and low-spirited in a little while however she again heard a little pattering of footsteps in the distance and she looked up eagerly half hoping that the mouse had changed his mind and was coming back to finish his story chapter 4 the rabbit sends in a little bill it was the White Rabbit trotting

slowly back again and looking anxiously about as it went as if it had lost something and she heard it muttering to itself The Duchess The Duchess oh my dear Paws oh my fur and whiskers she'll get me executed as sure as ferrets or ferrets where can I have dropped them I wonder Alice guessed in a moment that it was looking for the fan and the pair of white kid gloves and she very good-naturedly began hunting about for them but they were nowhere to be seen everything seemed to have changed since her swim in the pool

and the Great Hall with the glass table and The Little Door had vanished completely very soon the rabbit noticed Alice as she went hunting about and called out to her in an angry tone why Marianne what are you doing out here run home this moment and fetch me a pair of gloves and a fan quick now and Alice was so much frightened that she ran off at once in the direction it pointed to without trying to explain the mistake it had made he took me for his housemate she said to herself as she ran how

surprised he'll be when he finds out who I am but I'd better take him his fan in the gloves that is if I can find them as she said this She Came Upon a neat little house on the door of which was a bright brass plate with the name W rabbit engraved upon it she went in without knocking and hurried upstairs in great fear lest she should meet the real Marianne and be turned out of the house before she had found the fan and gloves how queer it seems Alice said to herself to be going

messages for a rabbit I suppose Dinah will be sending me on messages next and she began fancying the sort of thing that would happen Miss Alice come here directly and get ready for your walk coming in a minute nurse but I've got to see that the mouse doesn't get out only I don't think Alice went on that they'd let Dinah stop in the house if it began ordering people about like that by this time she'd found her way into a tidy little room with a table in the window and on it as she had hoped

a fan and two or three pairs of tiny white kid gloves she took up the fan and a pair of the gloves and was just going to leave the room when her eye fell upon a little bottle that stood near the Looking Glass there was no label this time with the words drink me but nevertheless she Uncorked it and put it to her lips I know something interesting is sure to happen she said to herself whenever I eat or drink anything so I'll just see what this bottle does I do hope it'll make me grow

large again for really I'm quite tired of being such a tiny little thing did so indeed and much sooner than she had expected before she had drunk half the bottle she found her head pressing against the ceiling and had to stoop to save her neck from being broken she hastily put down the bottle saying to herself that's quite enough I hope I shan't grow anymore as it is I can't get out the door I do wish I hadn't drunk quite so much alas it was too late to wish that she went on growing and growing

and very soon had to kneel on the floor in another minute there was not even room for this and she tried the effect of lying down with one elbow against the door and the other arm curled around her head still she went on growing and as a last resource she put one arm out of the window and one foot up the chimney and said to herself now I can do no more whatever happens what will become of me luckily for Alice the little magic bottle had now had its full effect and she grew no larger

still it was very uncomfortable and as there seemed to be no sort of chance of her ever getting out of the room again no wonder she felt unhappy it was much pleasanter at home thought poor Alice when one wasn't always growing larger and smaller and being ordered about by mice and rabbits I almost wish I hadn't gone down that rabbit hole and yet it's rather curious you know this sort of life I do wonder what can have happened to me when I used to read fairy tales I fancied that kind of thing never happened and

now here I am in the middle of one there ought to be a book written about me that they're ought and when I grow up I'll write one but I'm grown up now she added in a sorrowful tone at least there's no room to grow up anymore here but then thought Alice shall I never get any older than I am now that'll be a comfort One Way never to be an old woman but then always to have lessons to learn oh I shouldn't like that oh you foolish Alice she answered herself how can you learn

lessons in here why there's hardly room for you and no room at all for any lesson books and so she went on taking first one side and then the other and making quite a conversation of it all together but after a few minutes she heard a voice outside and stopped to listen Marianne Marianne said the voice fetch me Mike loves this moment then came a little pattering of feet on the stairs Alice knew it was the rabbit coming to look for her and she trembled till she shook the house quite forgetting that she was now

about a thousand times as large as the rabbit and had no reason to be afraid of it presently the rabbit came up to the door and tried to open it but as the door opened inwards and Alice's elbow was pressed hard against it that attempt proved a failure Alice heard it say to itself then I'll go round and get in at the window that you won't thought Alice and after waiting until she fancied she heard the rabbit just under the window she suddenly spread out her hand and made a snatch in the air she did

not get hold of anything but she heard a little shriek and a fall and a crash of broken glass from which she concluded that it was just possible it had fallen into a cucumber frame or something of the sort next came an angry voice the rabbits pat pat where are you and then a voice she had never heard before sure that I'm here digging for apples your honor digging for apples indeed said the rabbit angrily here come and help me get out of this sounds of more broken glass now tell me Pat what's that in

the window sure it's an arm your honor an arm you Goose whoever saw one that size why it fills the whole window so it does your honor but it's an arm for all that well it's got no business there at any rate go and take it away there was a long silence after this and Alice could only hear Whispers now and then such as sure I don't like it your honor at all at all do as I tell you coward and at last she spread her hand again and made another snatch in the air this

time there were two little shrieks and more sounds of broken glass what a number of cucumber frames there must be thought Alice I wonder what they'll do next As for pulling me out of the window I only wish they could I'm sure I don't want to stay in here any longer she waited for some time without hearing anything more at last came a rumbling of little cartwheels and the sound of a good many voices all talking together she made out the words where's the other ladder why hadn't to bring but one Bill's got the other

bill I did hear lad here put him up this corner no time together first they don't reach half height enough yet no they'll do well enough don't be particular here Bill catch hold this rope will the roof bear mind that loose slate oh it's coming down heads below a loud crash now who did that it was Bill I fancy who's to go down the chimney nay I shant you do it that I won't then bills to go down ear Bill the master says you're to go down the chimney oh so Bill's got to come down

the chimney has he said Alice to herself shy they seem to put everything upon bill I wouldn't be in Bill's Place for a good deal this fireplace is narrow to be sure but I think I can kick a little she Drew her foot as far down the chimney as she could and waited till she heard a little animal she couldn't guess of what sword it was scratching and scrambling about in the chimney close above her then saying to herself this is Bill she gave one sharp kick and waited to see what would happen next the

first thing she heard was a general chorus of oh there goes bill then the rabbit's voice along catch him you by the Hedge then silence and then another confusion of voices hold up his head Brandy now don't choke him how was it old fella what happened to you tell us about it last came a little feeble squeaking voice that's Bill thought Alice well I hardly know no more thank you I'm better now but I'm a deal too fluster to tell you all I know is something comes at me like a Jack In The Box and

I goes like a Skyrocket so you did old fella said the others we must burn the house down said the rabbit's voice and Alice called out as loud as she could if you do I'll set Dinah at you there was a dead silence instantly and Alice thought to herself I wonder what they will do next if it had any sense they'd take the roof off after a minute or two they began moving about again and Alice heard the rabbit say a barrelful will do to begin with a powerful of what thought Alice but she had

not longed to doubt for the next moment a shower of little Pebbles came rattling in at the window and some of them hit her in the face I'll put a stop to this she said to herself and shouted out you'd better not do that again which produced another Dead Silence Alice noticed with some surprise that the Pebbles were all turning into Little Cakes as they lay on the floor and a bright idea came into her head if I eat one of these cakes she thought it's sure to make some change in my size and as

it can't possibly make me larger it must make me smaller I suppose so she swallowed one of the cakes and was delighted to find that she began shrinking directly as soon as she was small enough to get through the door she ran out of the house and found quite a crowd of little animals and birds waiting outside the poor little lizard bill was in the middle being held up by two guinea pigs who were giving it something out of a bottle they all made a rush at Alice the moment she appeared but she ran off

as hard as she could and soon found herself safe in a thick wood the first thing I've got to do said Alice to herself as she wandered about in the wood is to grow to my right size again and the second thing is to find my way into that lovely Garden I think that will be the best plan it sounded an excellent plan no doubt and very neatly and simply arranged the only difficulty was that she had not the smallest idea how to set about it and while she was peering about anxiously among the trees

a little sharp bark just over her head made her look up in a great hurry an enormous puppy was looking down at her with large round eyes and feebly stretching out one paw trying to touch her poor little thing said Alice in a coaxing tone and she tried hard to whistle to it but she was terribly frightened all the time at the thought that it might be hungry in which case it would be very likely to eat her up in spite of all her Coke thing hardly knowing what she did she picked up a little

bit of stick and held it out to the puppy whereupon the puppy jumped into the air off all its feet at once with a Yelp of delight and rushed at the stick and made Believe to worry it then Alice dodged behind a great thistle to keep herself from being run over and the moment she appeared on the other side the puppy made another Rush at the stick and tumbled head over heels in its hurry to get hold of it then Alice thinking it was very like having a game of play with a card horse and

expecting every moment to be Trampled Under its feet ran round the thistle again then the puppy began a series of short charges at the stick running a very little ways forward each time and a long way back and barking hoarsely all the while till at last it sat down a good way off panting with its tongue hanging out of its mouth and its great eyes half shut this seemed to Alice a good opportunity for making her Escape so she set off at once and ran till she was quite tired and out of breath until the

puppy's bark sounded quite faint in the distance and yet what a dear little puppy it was said Alice as she lent against a buttercup to rest herself and fanned herself with one of the leaves I should have liked teaching it tricks very much if if I'd only been the right size to do it oh dear I'd nearly forgotten that I've got to grow up again let me see how is it to be managed I suppose I ought to eat or drink something or the other but the great question is what the great question certainly was

what Alice looked all around her at the flowers and the blades of grass but she did not see anything that looked like the right thing to eat or drink under the circumstances there was a large mushroom growing near her about the same height as herself and when she had looked under it and on both sides of it and behind it it occurred to her that she might as well look and see what was on the top of it she stretched herself up on tiptoe and peeped over the edge of the mushroom and her eyes immediately

met those of a large caterpillar that was sitting on the top with its arms folded quietly smoking a long hookah and taking not the smallest notice of her or anything else chapter 5. a device from a caterpillar the caterpillar and Alice looked at each other for some time in silence at last the caterpillar took the hookah out of its mouth and addressed her in a language sleepy voice who are you said the caterpillar this was not an encouraging opening for a conversation Alice replied rather shyly I I hardly know sir just at present at least

I know who I was when I got up this morning but I think I must have been changed several times since then what do you mean by that said the caterpillar sternly explain yourself I can't explain myself I'm afraid sir said Alice because I'm not myself you see I don't see said the caterpillar I'm afraid I can't put it more clearly Alice replied very politely for I can't understand it myself to begin with and being so many different sizes in a day is very confusing it isn't said the caterpillar well perhaps you haven't found it

so yet said Alice but when you have to turn into a chrysalis you will someday you know and then after that into a butterfly I should think you'll feel it a little queer won't you not a bit said the caterpillar well perhaps your feelings may be different said Alice all I know is it would feel very queer to me you said the caterpillar contemptuously who are you which brought them back again to the beginning of the conversation Alice felt a little irritated at the caterpillars making such very short remarks and she Drew herself up and

said very Gravely I think you ought to tell me who you are first why said the caterpillar here was another puzzling question and as Alice could not think of any good reason and as the caterpillar seemed to be in a very unpleasant state of mind she turned away come back the caterpillar called after her I have something important to say this sounded promising certainly Alice turned and came back again keep your temper said the caterpillar is that all said Alice swallowing down her anger as well as she could no said the caterpillar Alice thought she

might as well wait as she had nothing else to do and perhaps after all it might tell her something worth hearing for some minutes it puffed away without speaking but at last it unfolded its arms took the hookah out of its mouth again and said so you think you're changed do you I'm afraid I am sir said Alice I can't remember things as I used and I don't keep the same size for 10 minutes together can't remember what things said the caterpillar well I've tried to say how doth the little Busy Bee but it all

came out different Alice replied in a very melancholy voice repeat you are old father William said the caterpillar Alice folded her hands and began you are old father William the young man said and your hair has become very white and yet you incessantly stand on your head do you think at your age it is right in my youth Father William replied to his son I feared it might injure the brain but now that I'm perfectly sure I have none why I do it again and again you are old said the youth as I mentioned before

and have grown most uncommonly fat yet you turned a back somersault in at the door pray what is the reason of that in my youths at the sage as he shook his gray locks I kept all my limbs very supple by the use of this ointment one shilling the Box allow me to sell you a couple you are old said the youth and your jaws are too weak for anything tougher than suet yet you finished the goose with the bones and the beak pray how did you manage to do it in my youths at his

father I took to the law and argued each case with my wife and the muscular strength which it gave to my jaw has lasted the rest of my life you are old said the youth one would hardly suppose that your eye was as steady as ever yet you balanced an eel on the end of your nose what made you so awfully clever I have answered three questions and that is enough said his father don't give yourself heirs do you think I can listen all day to such stuff be off or I'll kick you downstairs that

has not said right said the caterpillar not quite right I'm afraid said Alice timidly some of the words have got altered it is wrong from beginning to end said the caterpillar decidedly and there was silence for some minutes the caterpillar was the first to speak what size do you want to be he said oh I'm not particular as to size Alice hastily replied only one doesn't like changing so often you know I don't know said the caterpillar Alice said nothing she'd never been so much contradicted in her life before and she felt that she was

losing her temper are you content now said the caterpillar well I should like to be a little larger sir if you wouldn't mind said Alice three inches is such a wretched height to be it is a very good height indeed said the caterpillar angrily rearing itself upright as it spoke it was exactly three inches high but I'm not used to it pleaded poor Alice in a piteous tone and she thought of herself I wish the creatures wouldn't be so easily offended you'll get used to it in time said the caterpillar and it put the hookah

into its mouth and began smoking again this time Alice waited patiently until it chose to speak again in a minute or two the caterpillar took the hookah out of its mouth and yawned once or twice and shook itself then it got down off the mushroom and crawled away in the grass merely remarking as it went one side will make you grow taller and the other side will make you grow shorter one side of what the other side of what thought Alice to herself of the mushroom said the caterpillar just as if she had asked it

aloud and in another moment it was out of sight Alice remained looking thoughtfully at the mushroom for a minute trying to make out which were the two sides of it and as it was perfectly round she found this a very difficult question however at last she stretched her arms around it as far as they would go and broke off a bit of the edge with each hand and now which is which she said to herself and nibbled a little of the right hand bit to try the effect the next moment she felt a violent blow

underneath her chin it had struck her foot she was a good deal frightened by this very Sudden Change but she felt that there was no time to be lost and she was shrinking rapidly so she set to work at once to eat some of the other bit her chin was pressed so closely against her foot that there was hardly room to open her mouth but she did it at last and managed to swallow a morsel of the left hand bit come my hands free at last said Alice in a tone of delight which changed into

alarm in another moment when she found that her shoulders were nowhere to be found all she could see when she looked down was an immense length of neck which seemed to rise like a stalk out of a sea of green leaves that lay far below her what can all that green stuff be said Alice and where have my shoulders got to and oh my poor hands how is it I can't see you she was moving them about as she spoke but no result seemed to follow except a little shaking among the distant green leaves as

there seemed to be no chance of getting her hands up to her head she tried to get her head down to them and was delighted to find that her neck would bend about easily in any direction like a serpent she had just succeeded in curving it down into a graceful zigzag and was going to dive in among the leaves which she found to be nothing but the tops of the trees under which she had been wandering when a sharp hiss made her draw back in a hurry a large pigeon had flown into her face and

was beating her violently with its wings serpent screamed the pigeon I'm not a serpent said Alice indignantly let me alone sir pentai say again repeated the pigeon but in a more subdued tone and added with a kind of saw I've tried every way and nothing seems to suit them I haven't the least idea what you're talking about said Alice I've tried the roots of trees and I've tried Banks and I've tried Hedges the pigeon went on without attending to her but those serpents there's no pleasing them Alice was more and more puzzled but she thought

there was no use in saying anything more till the pigeon had finished as if it wasn't trouble enough hatching the eggs said the pigeon but I must be on the lookout for serpents night and day why I haven't had a wink of sleep these three weeks I'm very sorry you've been annoyed said Alice who is beginning to see its meaning and just as I had taken the highest tree in the wood continued the pigeon raising its voice to a shriek and just as I was thinking I would be free of them at last they must

needs come wriggling down from the sky oh serpent but I'm not a serpent I tell you said Alice I'm a I'm a well what are you cried the pigeon I can see you're trying to invent something I I'm a little girl said Alice rather doubtfully as she remembered the number of changes she had gone through that day a likely story indeed said the Pigeon in a tone of deepest contempt I've seen a good many little girls in my time but never one with such a neck as that no no you're a serpent and there's no

use to denying it I suppose you'll be telling me next that you've never tasted an egg I have tasted eggs certainly said Alice who was a very truthful child but little girls eat eggs quite as much as serpents do you know I don't believe it said the pigeon but if they do why then they are kind of a serpent that's all I can say this was such a new idea to Alice that she was quite silent for a minute or two which gave the pigeon the opportunity of adding or looking for eggs I know that

well enough and what does it matter to me whether you're a little girl or a serpent it matters a good deal to me said Alice hastily but I'm not looking for eggs as it happens and if I was I shouldn't want yours I don't like them raw well be off then said the Pigeon in a sulky tone as it settled down again into its nest Alice crouched down among the trees as well as she could for her neck kept getting entangled among the branches and every now and then she had to stop and untwist it

after a while she remembered that she still held the piece of mushroom in her hands and she set to work very carefully nibbling first at one and then at the other and growing sometimes taller and sometimes shorter until she had succeeded in bringing herself down to her usual height it was so long since she had been anything near the right size that it felt quite strange at first but she got used to it in a few minutes and began talking to herself as usual come there's half my plan done now how puzzling all these changes

are I'm never sure what I'm going to be from one minute to another however I've got back to my right size the next thing is to get into that beautiful garden how is that to be done I wonder as she said this she came suddenly upon an open place with a little house in it about four feet high whoever lives there thought Alice it'll never do to come upon them this size why I should frighten them out of their wits so she began nibbling at the right-hand bit again and did not venture to go near

the house until she had brought herself down to nine inches high chapter 6 Pig and pepper for a minute or two she stood looking at the house and wondering what to do next when suddenly a foot man in Livery came running out of the wood she considered him to be a foot man because he was in Livery otherwise judging by his face only she would have called him a fish and wrapped loudly at the door with his knuckles it was opened by another footman in Livery with a round face and large eyes like a frog

and both footmen Alice noticed had powdered hair that curled all over their heads she felt very curious to know what it was all about and crept a little way out of the wood to listen the fish foot man began by producing from under his arm a great letter nearly as large as himself and this he handed over to the other saying in a solemn tone for The Duchess an invitation from the queen to play croquet the Frog footman repeated in the same solemn tone only changing the order of the words a little from the queen

an invitation for The Duchess to play croquet they both bowed low and their curls got entangled together Alice laughed so much at this that she had to run back into the wood for fear of their hearing her and when she next peeped out the fish footman was gone and the other one was sitting on the ground near the door staring stupidly up into the sky Alice went timidly up to the door and knocked there's no sort of use in knocking said the foot man and that for two reasons first because I'm on the same side

of the door as you are secondly because they're making such a noise inside no one could possibly hear you and certainly there was a most extraordinary noise going on Within constant howling and sneezing and every now and then a great crash as if a dish or Kettle had been broken to Pieces please then said Alice how am I to get in there might be some sense in your knocking the footmen went on without attending to her if we had the door between us for instance if you were inside you might knock and I could let

you out you know he was looking up into the sky all the time he was speaking and this Alice thought decidedly uncivil but perhaps he can't help it she said to herself his eyes are so very nearly at the top of his head but at any rate he might answer questions how am I to get in she repeated aloud I shall sit here the footman remarked till tomorrow at this moment the door of the house opened and a large plate came skimming out straight at the footman's head it just grazed his nose and broke to

Pieces against one of the trees behind him or next day maybe the footmen continued in the same tone exactly as if nothing had happened how am I to get in asked Alice again in a louder tone are you to get in at all said the footman that's the first question you know it was no doubt only Alice did not like to be told so it's really Dreadful she muttered to herself the way all the creatures argue it's enough to drive one crazy the footman seemed to think this a good opportunity for repeating his remark with

variations I shall sit here he said on and off for days and days but what am I to do said Alice anything you like said the footman and began whistling [Music] oh there's no use in talking to him said Alice desperately he's perfectly idiotic and she opened the door and went in the door LED right into a large kitchen which was full of smoke from one end to the other The Duchess was sitting on a three-legged stool in the middle nursing a baby the cook was leaning over the fire stirring a large cauldron which seemed

to be full of soup there's certainly too much pepper in that soup Alice said to herself as well as she could for sneezing there was certainly too much of it in the air even The Duchess sneezed occasionally and as for the baby it was sneezing and Howling alternately without a moment's pause the only things in the kitchen that did not sneeze were the cook and a large cat which was sitting on the Hearth and grinning from ear to ear please would you tell me said Alice a little timidly for she was not quite sure whether

it was good manners for her to speak first why your cat grins like that it's a Cheshire Cat said The Duchess and that's why Pig she said the last word with such sudden violence that Alice quite jumped but she saw in another moment that it was addressed to the baby and not to her so she took courage and went on again I didn't know that Cheshire cats always grinned in fact I didn't know that Cheshire Cats Could grin they all can said The Duchess and most of them do I don't know of any that do

Alice said very politely feeling quite pleased to have gotten into a conversation you don't know much said The Duchess and that's a fact Alice did not at all like the tone of this remark and thought it would be as well to introduce some other subject of conversation while she was trying to fix on one the cook took the cauldron of soup off the fire and at once set to work throwing everything within her reach at The Duchess and the baby the fire iron came first Then followed a shower of saucepans plates and dishes The Duchess

took no notice of them even when they hit her and the baby was howling so much already that it was quite impossible to say whether the blows heard it or not oh please mind what you're doing cried Alice jumping up and down in an Agony of Terror oh there goes his precious nose an unusually large saucepan flew close by it and very nearly carried it off if everybody minded their own business The Duchess said in a horse growl the world would go round a deal faster than it does which would not be an advantage said

Alice who felt very glad to get an opportunity of showing off a little of her knowledge just think of what work it would make with the day and night you see the Earth takes 24 hours to turn round on its axis talking of axes said The Duchess chop off her head Alice glanced rather anxiously at the cook to see if she meant to take the hint but the cook was busily stirring the soup and seemed not to be listening so she went on again 24 hours I think or is it 12 I oh don't bother

me said The Duchess I never could abide figures and with that she began nursing her child again singing a sort of lullaby to it as she did so and giving it a violent shake at the end of every line speak roughly to your little boy and beat him when he sneezes he only does it to annoy because he knows it teases chorus in which the cook and the baby joined wow wow wow while The Duchess sang the second verse of the song she kept tossing the baby violently up and down and the poor little thing

howled so that Alice could hardly hear the words I speak severely to my boy I beat him when he sneezes for he can thoroughly enjoy the pepper when he pleases wow wow wow here you may nurse it a bit if you like The Duchess said to Alice flinging the baby at her as she spoke I must go and get ready to play croquet with the queen and she hurried out of the room the cook threw a frying pan after her as she went out but it just missed her Alice caught the baby with some difficulty

as it was a queer-shaped little creature and held out its arms and legs in all directions just like a starfish thought Alice the poor little thing was snorting like a steam engine when she caught it and kept doubling itself up and straightening itself out again so that all together for the first minute or two it was as much as she could do to hold it as soon as she had made out the proper way of nursing it which was to twist it up into a sort of knot and then keep tight hold of its rear

ear and left foot so as to prevent its undoing itself she carried it out into the open air if I don't take this child away with me thought Alice they're sure to kill it in a day or two wouldn't it be murder to leave it behind she said the last words out loud and the little thing grunted in reply it had left off sneezing by this time don't grunt said Alice that's not at all a proper way of expressing yourself the baby grunted again and Alice looked very anxiously into its face to see what was

the matter with it there could be no doubt that it had a very turnip nose much more like a snout than a real nose also its eyes were getting extremely small for a baby altogether Alice did not like the look of the thing at all but perhaps it was only sobbing she thought and looked into its eyes again to see if there were any tears no there were no tears if you're going to turn into a pig my dear said Alice seriously I'll have nothing more to do with you mind now the poor little thing

sobbed again or grunted it was impossible to say which and they went on for some while in silence Alice was just beginning to think to herself now what am I to do with this creature when I get it home when it grunted again so violently that she looked down into its face in some alarm this time there could be no mistake about it it was neither more nor less than a pig and she felt that it would be quite absurd for her to carry it further so she left a little creature down and felt quite

relieved to see it Trot away quietly into the wood if it had grown up she said to herself it would have made a dreadfully ugly child but it makes rather a handsome Pig I think and she began thinking over other children she knew who might do very well as pigs and was just saying to herself if one only knew the right way to change them when she was a little startled by seeing the Cheshire Cat sitting on a bow of a tree a few yards off the cat only grinned when it Saw Alice it looked

good-natured she thought still it had very long claws and a great many teeth so she felt that it ought to be treated with respect she began rather timidly as she did not at all know whether it would like the name however it only grinned a little wider comets pleased so far thought Alice and she went on would you tell me please which way I ought to go from here that depends a good deal on where you want to get to said the cat I don't much care where said Alice then it doesn't matter which way

you go said the cat so long as I get somewhere Alice added as an explanation oh you're sure to do that said the cat if you only walk long enough Alice felt that this could not be denied so she tried another question what sort of people live about here in that direction the cat said waving its right paw around lives a Hatter and in that direction waving the other paw lives in March hair visit either you like they're both mad but I don't want to go among mad people Alice remarked oh you can't help that

said the cat we're all mad here I'm mad you're mad how do you know I'm mad said Alice you must be said the cat or you wouldn't have come here Alice didn't think that proved it at all however she went on and how do you know that you're mad to begin with said the cat a dog's not mad you grant that I suppose so said Alice well then the cat went on you see a dog growls when it's angry and wags its tail when it's pleased now I growl when I'm pleased and wag my tail

when I'm angry therefore I'm mad I call it purring not growling said Alice call it what you like said the cat do you play croquet with the queen today I should like it very much said Alice but I haven't been invited yet you'll see me there said the cat and vanished Alice was not much surprised at this she was getting so used to queer things happening while she was looking at the place where it had been it suddenly appeared Again by the by what became of the baby said the cat I'd nearly forgotten to ask

it turned into a pig Alice quietly said just as if it had come back in a natural way I thought it would said the cat and vanished again Alice waited a little half expecting to see it again but it did not appear and after a minute or two she walked on in the direction in which the March hair was said to live I've seen Hatters before she said to herself the March hair will be much the more interesting and perhaps as this is May it won't be raving mad at least not so mad as it

wasn't March as she said this she looked up and there was the cat again sitting on a branch of a tree did you say pig or fig said the cat I said Pig reply to Alice and I wish you wouldn't keep appearing and Vanishing so suddenly you make one quite giddy all right said the cat and this time it vanished quite slowly beginning with the end of the tale and ending with the grin which remained sometime after the rest of it had gone well I've often seen a cat without a grin thought Alice but a

grin without a cat it's the most curious thing I ever saw in my life she had not gone much farther before she came in sight of the House of the March hair she thought it must be the right house because the chimneys were shaped like ears and the roof was thatched with fur it was so large a house that she did not like to go nearer till she had nibbled some more of the left-handed bit of mushroom and raised herself to about two feet high even then she walked up towards it rather timidly saying to

herself suppose it should be raving mad after all I almost wish I'd gone to see the hatter instead chapter 7. a mad Tea Party there was a table set out under a tree in front of the house and the March hair and the hatter were having tea at it a door mouse was sitting between them fast asleep and the other two were using it as a cushion resting their elbows on it and talking over its head very uncomfortable for the door Mouse thought Alice only as it's asleep I suppose it doesn't mind the table was

a large one but the three were all crowded together at one corner of it no room no room they cried out when they saw Alice coming there's plenty of room said Alice indignantly and she sat down in a large armchair at one end of the table have some wine the March Hare said in an encouraging tone Alice looked all round the table but there was nothing on it but tea I don't see any wine she remarked there isn't any said the March hair then it wasn't very civil of you to offer it said Alice angrily

it wasn't very civil of you to sit down without being invited said the March hair I didn't know it was your table said Alice it's laid for a great many more than three your hair once cutting said the hatter he'd been looking at Alice for some time with great curiosity and this was his first speech you should learn not to make personal remarks Alice said with some severity it's very rude the hatter opened his eyes very wide on hearing this but all he said was why is a raven like a writing desk come we shall

have some fun now thought Alice I'm glad you've begun asking riddles I believe I can guess that she added aloud do you mean you think you can find out the answer to it said the March hair exactly so said Alice then you should say what you mean the March hair went on I do Alice hastily replied at least at least I mean what I say that's the same thing you know not the same thing a bit said the hatter you might just as well say added the March hair that I'd like what I get is

the same thing as I get what I like you might just as well say added the Dormouse who seemed to be talking in his sleep that I breathe when I sleep is the same thing as I sleep when I breathe it is the same thing with you said the hatter and here the conversation dropped and the party sat silent for a minute while Alice thought overall she could remember about Ravens and writing desks which wasn't much the hatter was the first to break the silence what day of the month is it he said turning to

Alice he had taken his watch out of his pocket and was looking at it uneasily shaking it every now and then and holding it to his ear Alice considered a little and then said the fourth two days wrong side the hatter I told you butter wouldn't suit the works he added looking angrily at the March hair it was the best butter the March Hare meekly replied yes but some crumbs must have gotten in its well the hatter grumbled you shouldn't have put it in with the bread knife the March hair took the watch and looked

at it gloomily then he dipped it into his cup of tea and looked at it again but he could think of nothing better to say than his first remark it was the best butter you know Alice had been looking over his shoulder with some curiosity what a funny watch she remarked it tells the day of the month and doesn't tell what a clock it is why should it the hatter does your watch tell you what year it is of course not Alice replied very readily but that's because it stays the same year for such a

long time altogether which is just the case with mine said the hatter Alice felt dreadfully puzzled the Hatter's remark seemed to have no sort of meaning in it and yet it was certainly English I don't quite understand you she said as politely as she could the door Mouse is asleep again said the hatter and he poured a little hot tea upon its nose The Dormouse shook its head impatiently and said without opening its eyes of course of course just what I was going to remark myself have you guessed the riddle yet the hatter said turning

to Alice again no I give it up Alice replied what's the answer I haven't the slightest idea said the hatter nor I said the March hair Alice side wearily I think you might do something better with the time she said than wasted and asking riddles that have no answers if you knew time as well as I do said the hatter you wouldn't talk about wasting it it's him I don't know what you mean said Alice of course you don't the hatter said tossing his head contemptuously I dare say you never even spoke to time perhaps

not Alice cautiously replied but I know I have to beat time when I learn music ah that accounts for it said the hatter he won't stand beating now if you only keep on good terms with him he'd do almost anything you'd like with the clock for instance suppose it were nine o'clock in the morning just time to begin lessons you'd only have to whisper a hint to time and round goes the clock in a twinkling half past one time for dinner I only wish it was the March hair said to itself in a whisper that

would be grand certainly said Alice thoughtfully but then I shouldn't be hungry for it you know not at first perhaps said the hatter but you could keep it to half past one as long as you liked is that the way you manage Alice asked the hatter shook his head mournfully not I he replied we quarreled last March just before he went mad you know pointing with his teaspoon of the March hair it was at the great concert given by the queen of hearts and I had to sing Twinkle Twinkle Little Bat how I wonder what

you're at you know the song Perhaps I've heard something like it said Alice it goes on you know the hatter continued in this way up above the world you fly like a tea tree in the sky twinkle twinkle here the Dormouse shook itself and began singing in its sleep twinkle twinkle and went on so long they had to pinch it to make it stop well I'd hardly finished the first verse said the hatter when the queen jumped up and balled out he's murdering the time off with his head how dreadfully Savage exclaimed Alice and ever

since that the hatter went on in a mournful tone he won't do a thing I ask it's always six o'clock now a bright idea came into Alice's head is that the reason so many tea things are put out here she asked yes that's it said the hatter with the sigh it's always tea time and we've no time to wash things between whiles then you keep moving around I suppose said Alice exactly so said the hatter as the things get used up but what happens when you come to the beginning again Alice ventured to ask suppose

we change the subject the March Hare interrupted yawning I'm getting tired of this I vote the young lady tells us a story I'm afraid I don't know one said Alice rather alarmed at the proposal then the Dormouse shall they both cried wake up Dormouse and they pinched it on both sides at once The Dormouse slowly opened its eyes I wasn't asleep he said in a horse feeble voice I heard every word you fellows were saying tell us a story said the March hair yes please do pleaded Alice and be quick about it added the hatter

or you'll be asleep again before it's done once upon a time there were three little sisters the door Mouse began in a great hurry and their names were Elise Lacey and Tilly and they lived at the bottom of a well what did they live on said Alice who always took a great interest in questions of eating and drinking they lived on treacle said the Dormouse after thinking a minute or two they couldn't have done that you know Alice gently remarked they'd have been ill so they were said the Dormouse very ill Alice tried to fancy

to herself what such an extraordinary way of living would be like but it puzzled her too much so she went on but why did they live at the bottom of a well take some more tea the March Hare said to Alice very earnestly I've had nothing yet Alice replied in an offended tone so I can't take more you mean you can't take less said the hatter it's very easy to take more than nothing nobody asked your opinion said Alice who's making personal remarks now the hatter asked triumphantly Alice did not quite know what to say

to this so she helped herself to some tea in bread and butter and then turned to the Dormouse and repeated her question why did they live at the bottom of a well The Dormouse again took a minute or two to think about it and then said it was a trickle well there's no such thing Alice was beginning very angrily but the hatter in the March hair went and the Dormouse sulkily remarked if you can't be civil you'd better finish the story for yourself no please go on Alice said very humbly I won't interrupt again I

dare say there may be one one indeed said the Dormouse indignantly however he consented to go on and so these three little sisters they were learning to draw you know what did they draw said Alice quite forgetting her promise treacle said the Dormouse without considering at all this time I want a clean cup interrupted the hatter let's all move one place on he moved on as he spoke and the Dormouse followed him the March Air moved into the dormouse's place and Alice rather unwillingly took the place of the March hair the hatter was the only

one who got any advantage from the change and Alice was a good deal worse off than before as the March hair had just upset The Milk Jug into his plate Alice did not wish to offend the Dormouse again so she began very cautiously but I don't understand where did they draw the treacle from you can draw water out of a well said the hatter so I should think you could draw a treacle out of a trickle well hey stupid but they were in the well Alice said to the Dormouse not choosing to notice the last

remark of course they were said the Dormouse well in this answer's so confused poor Alice that she let the Dormouse go on for some time without interrupting it they were learning to draw the Dormouse went on yawning and rubbing its eyes for it was getting very sleepy and then Drew all manner of things everything that begins with an m why with an M said Alice why not said the march here Alice was silent The Dormouse had closed its eyes by this time and was going off into a doze but on being pinched by the hatter

it woke up again with a little shriek and went on that begins with an M such as mouse traps and the moon and memory and muchness you know you say things are much of a muchness did you ever see such a thing as a drawing of a muchness really now you ask me said Alice very much confused I don't think then you shouldn't talk said the hatter this piece of rudeness was more than Alice could bear she got up in great disgust and walked off The Dormouse fell asleep instantly and neither of the others took

the least notice of her going though she looked back once or twice half hoping that they would call after her the last time she saw them they were trying to put the Dormouse into the teapot at any rate I'll never go there again said Alice as she picked her way through the wood it's the stupidest tea party I ever was at in all my life just as she said this she noticed that one of the trees had a door leading right into it that's very curious she thought everything's curious today I think I may as

well go in at once and in she went once more she found herself in the Long Haul and close to the little glass table now I'll manage better this time she said to herself and began by taking the little golden key and unlocking the door that led into the garden then she went to work nibbling at the mushroom she'd kept a piece of it in her pocket till she was about a foot high then she walked down the little passage and then she found herself at last in the beautiful garden among the bright flower beds

and the cool fountains chapter 8 the Queen's croquet ground a large rose tree stood near the entrance of the garden the Roses growing on it were white but there were three gardeners at it busily painting them red Alice thought this a very curious thing and she went near to watch them and just as she came up to them she heard one of them say look out now five don't go splash and paint over me like that I couldn't help it said five in a silky tone seven jogged my elbow on which seven looked up and

said that's right five always lay the blame on others you'd better not talk said five I heard the queen say only yesterday you deserve to be beheaded what for said the one who had spoken up first that's none of your business too said seven yes it is his business said five and I'll tell him it was for bringing the cook tulip Roots instead of onions seven flung down his brush and had just begun well all of the unjust things when is I chanced to fall upon Alice as she stood watching them and he checked himself

suddenly the others looked round also and all of them bowed low would you tell me said Alice a little timidly why you are painting those Roses five and seven said nothing but looked at two two began in a low voice Roy the fact is you see Miss This Here ought to have been a red rose tree and we put in a white one by mistake and if the queen was to find out we should all have our heads cut off you know so you see Miss we're doing our best before she comes to at this

moment five who had been anxiously looking around the garden called out Queen the queen and the three gardeners instantly threw themselves flat upon their faces there is a sound of many footsteps and Alice looked round eager to see the queen first came ten soldiers carrying clubs these were all shaped like the three gardeners oblong and flat with their hands and feet at the corners next the ten courtiers these were ornamented all over with diamonds and walked two and two as the soldiers did after these came the Royal children there were 10 of them and the

little deers came jumping merrily along hand in hand in couples they were all ornamented with hearts next came the guests mostly kings and queens and among them Alice recognized the White Rabbit it was talking in A hurried nervous manner smiling at everything that was said and went by without noticing her Then followed the knave of Hearts carrying the king's crown on a crimson velvet cushion and last of all this Grand procession came The King and Queen of Hearts Alice was rather doubtful whether she ought not to lie down on her face like the three gardeners

but she could not remember ever having heard of such a rule at processions and besides what would be the use of a procession thought she if people had all to lie down upon their faces so they couldn't see it so she stood still where she was and waited when the procession came opposite to Alice they all stopped and looked at her and the queen said severely who is this she said it to the knave of Hearts who only bowed and smiled in reply idiot said the queen tossing her head impatiently and turning to Alice she

went on what's your name child my name is Alice so it pleased your majesty said Alice very politely but she added to herself why they're only a pack of cards after all I needn't be afraid of them and who are these said the queen pointing to the three gardeners who were lying round the rose tree for you see as they were lying on their faces and the pattern on their backs was the same as the rest of the pack she could not tell whether they were gardeners or soldiers or courtiers or three of her own

children how should I know said Alice surprised at her own courage it's no business of mine the queen turned Crimson with Fury and after glaring at her for a moment like a wild beast screamed off with her head off nonsense said Alice very loudly and decidedly and the queen was silent the king laid his hand upon her arm and timidly said consider my dear she is only a child the queen turned angrily away from him and said to the knave turn them over the Nave did so very carefully with one foot get up said the

queen in a shrill loud voice and the three gardeners instantly jumped up and began bowing to the king the Queen the Royal children and everybody else leave off that screamed the queen you make me giddy and then turning to The Rose Tree she went on what have you been doing here may please your majesty said two in a very humble tone going down on one knee as he spoke we were trying I see said the queen who had meanwhile been examining the Roses Off With Their Heads and the procession moved on three of the soldiers

remaining behind to execute the unfortunate gardeners who ran to Alice for protection you shan't be beheaded said Alice as she put them into a large flower pot that stood near the three soldiers wandered about for a minute or two looking for them and then quietly marched off after the others are their heads off shouted the queen their heads are gone they may please your majesty the soldiers shouted in reply that's right shouted the queen can you play croquet the soldiers were silent and looked at Alice as the question was evidently meant for her yes shouted

Alice come on then roared the queen and Alice joined the procession wondering very much what would happen next it's it's a very fine day said a timid voice at her side she was walking by the White Rabbit who was peeping anxiously into her face very said Alice where's The Duchess hush hush said the rabbit in a low hurried tone he looked anxiously over his shoulder as he spoke and then raised himself upon tiptoe put his mouth close to her ear and whispered she's under sentence of execution what for said Alice did you say what a

pity the rabbit asked no I didn't said Alice I don't think it's at all a Pity I said what for she boxed the Queen's ears the rabbit began Alice gave a little scream of laughter oh hush the rabbit whispered in a frightened tone the queen will hear you do you see she came rather late and the queen said get to your places shouted the queen in a voice of thunder and people began running about in all directions tumbling up against each other however they got settled down in a minute or two and the game began

Alice thought she had never seen such a curious croquet ground in all her life it was all ridges and furrows and the balls were live hedgehogs the mallets live flamingos and the soldiers had to double themselves up to stand on their hands and feet to make the arches the chief difficulty Alice found at first was in managing her flamingo she succeeded in getting its body tucked away comfortably enough under her arm with its legs hanging down but generally just as she had got its neck nicely straightened out and was going to give the Hedgehog a

blow with its head it would twist itself around and look up in her face with such a puzzled expression that she could not help bursting out laughing and when she had got its head down and was going to begin again it was very provoking to find that the Hedgehog had unrolled itself and was in the act of crawling away besides all this there was generally a ridge or Furrow in the way wherever she wanted to send the Hedgehog to and as the doubled up soldiers were always getting up and walking off to other parts of

the ground Alice soon came to the conclusion that it was a very difficult game indeed the players all played at once without waiting for turns quarreling all the while and fighting for the Hedgehogs and in a very short time the queen was in a furious passion and went stamping about and shouting Off With His Head or off with her head about once in a minute Alice began to feel very uneasy to be sure she had not as yet had any dispute with the queen but she knew that it might happen any minute and then thought

she what would become of me they're dreadfully fond of beheading people here the great wonder is that there's anyone left alive she was looking about for some way of escape and wondering whether she could get away without being seen when she noticed a curious appearance in the air it puzzled her very much at first but after watching it a minute or two she made it out to be a grin and she said to herself oh the Cheshire Cat now I shall have somebody to talk to how are you getting on said the cat as soon

as there was mouth enough for it to speak with Alice waited till the eyes appeared and then nodded it's no use speaking to it she thought till its ears have come or at least one of them in another minute the whole head appeared and then Alice put down her Flamingo and began an account of the game feeling very glad she had someone to listen to her the cat seemed to think there was enough of it now in sight and no more of it appeared I don't think they play at all fairly Alice began in a

rather complaining tone and they all quarrel so dreadfully one can't hear oneself speak and they don't seem to have any rules in particular at least if there are nobody attends to them and you've no idea how confusing it is all the things being alive for instance there's the arch I've got to go through next Walking about at the other end of the ground and I should have croqueted the Queen's Hedgehog just now only it ran away when it saw mine coming how do you like the queen said the cat in a low voice not at

all said Alice she's so extremely just then she noticed that the queen was close behind her listening so she went on likely to win that it's hardly worthwhile finishing the game the queen smiled and passed on who are you talking to said the king going up to Alice and looking at the cat's head with great curiosity it's a friend of mine a shashar capped said Alice allow me to introduce it I don't like the look of it at all said the king however it may kiss my hand if it likes I'd rather not the cat

remarked don't be impertinent said the king and don't look at me like that he got behind Alice as he spoke a cat may look at a king said Alice I've read that in some book but I don't remember where it must be removed said the king very decidedly and he called the queen who was passing at the moment my dear I wish you would have this cat removed the queen had only one way of settling all difficulties great or small Off With His Head she said without even looking round I'll fetch the Executioner myself said

the king eagerly and he hurried off Alice thought she might as well go back and see how the game was going on as she heard the Queen's voice in the distance screaming with passion she had already heard her sentence three of the players to be executed for having missed their turns and she did not like the look of things at all as the game was in such confusion that she never knew whether it was her turn or not so she went on in search of her Hedgehog the Hedgehog was engaged in a fight with another

Hedgehog which seemed to Alice an excellent opportunity for croqueting one of them with the other the only difficulty was that her Flamingo was gone across to the other side of the garden where Alice could see it trying in a helpless sort of way to fly up into a tree by the time she had caught the Flamingo and brought it back the fight was over and both the Hedgehogs were out of sight but it doesn't matter much thought Alice as all the Arches are gone from this side of the ground so she tucked it away under

her arm that it might not escape again and went back for a little more conversation with her friend when she got back to the Cheshire Cat she was surprised to find quite a large crowd collected round it there was a dispute going on between the Executioner the king and the queen who were all talking at once while all the rest were quite silent and looked very uncomfortable the moment Alice appeared she was appealed to by all there to settle the question and they repeated their arguments to her though as they all spoke at once she

found it very hard indeed to make out exactly what they said The Executioner's argument was that you couldn't cut off a head unless there was a body to cut it off from that he had never had to do such a thing before and he wasn't going to begin at his time of life the king's argument was that anything that had a head could be beheaded and that you weren't to talk nonsense the Queen's argument was that if something wasn't done about it in less than no time she'd have everybody executed all round it was this

last remark that had made the whole party look so grave and anxious Alice could think of nothing else to say but it belongs to The Duchess you'd better ask her about it she's in prison the queen said to the Executioner that you're here and the Executioner went off like an arrow the cat's head began fading away the moment he was gone and by the time he had come back with the duchess it had entirely disappeared so the king in the Executioner ran wildly up and down looking for it while the rest of the party went

back to the game chapter 9. the mock Turtles Story you can't think how glad I am to see you again you dear old thing said The Duchess as she tucked her arm affectionately into Alice's and they walked off together Alice was very glad to find her in such a pleasant temper and thought to herself that perhaps it was only the pepper that had made her so Savage when they met in the kitchen when I'm a duchess she said to herself not in a very hopeful tone though I won't have any pepper in my kitchen at

all soup does very well without maybe it's always pepper that makes people hot tempered she went on very much pleased at having found out a new kind of rule and vinegar that makes them sour and chamomile that makes them bitter and and barley sugar and such things that make children sweet tempered I only wish people knew that that they wouldn't be so stingy about it you know she had quite forgotten The Duchess by this time and was a little startled when she heard her voice close to her ear you're thinking about something my dear and

that makes you forget to talk I can't tell you just now what the moral of that is but I shall remember it in a bit perhaps it hasn't won Alice ventured to remark Tut tut child said The Duchess everything's got a moral if only you can find it and she squeezed herself up closer to Alice's side as she spoke Alice did not much like keeping so close to her first because the duchess was very ugly and secondly because she was exactly the right height to rest her chin upon Alice's shoulder and it was an uncomfortably

sharp chin however she did not like to be rude so she bore it as well as she could the games going on rather better now she said by way of keeping up the conversation a little tiso said The Duchess and the moral of that is owed his love his love that makes the world go round somebody said Alice whispered that it's done by everybody minding their own business ah well that means much the same thing said The Duchess digging her sharp little chin into Alice's shoulder as she added and the moral of that is take

care of the sense and the sounds will take care of themselves how fun she is of finding morals and things Alice thought to herself I dare say you're wondering why I don't put my arm around your waist The Duchess said after a pause the reason is that I'm doubtful about The Temper of your Flamingo shall I try the experiment he might bite Alice cautiously replied not feeling at all anxious to have the experiment tried very true said The Duchess flamingos and mustard both bite and the moral of that is birds of a feather flock together

only mustard isn't a bird Alice remarked right as usual said The Duchess what a clever way you have of putting things it's a mineral I think said Alice of course it is said The Duchess who seemed ready to agree to everything that Alice said there's a large mustard mine near here and the moral of that is the more there is of mine the less there is of yours oh I know exclaimed Alice who had not attended to this last remark it's a vegetable it doesn't look like one but it is I quite agree with you

said The Duchess and the moral of that is be what you would seem to be or if you'd like to put it more simply never imagine yourself not to be otherwise then white it might appear to others that you were or might have been was not otherwise than what you have been would have appeared to them to be otherwise I think I should understand that better Alice said very politely if I had written it down but I can't quite follow it as you say it that's nothing to what I could say if I choose the

duchess replied in a pleased tone pray don't trouble yourself to say it any longer than that said Alice oh don't talk about trouble said The Duchess I make you a present of everything I've said as yet a cheap sort of present thought Alice I'm glad they don't give birthday presents like that but she did not venture to say it out loud thinking Again The Duchess asked with another dig of her sharp little chin I have a right to think said Alice sharply for she was beginning to feel a little worried just about as much right

said The Duchess as pigs have to fly and the mo but here to Alice's great surprise The duchess's Voice died away even in the middle of her favorite word moral and the arm that was linked into hers began to tremble Alice looked up and there stood the queen in front of them with her arms folded frowning like a thunderstorm a fine day your majesty The Duchess began in a low weak voice now I gave you fair warning shouted the queen stamping on the ground as she spoke either you or your head must be off and

that in about half no time take your choice The Duchess took her choice and was gone in a moment let's get on with the game the queen said to Alice and Alice was too much frightened to say a word but slowly followed her back to the croquet ground the other guests had taken advantage of the Queen's absence and were resting in the shade however the moment they saw her they hurried back to the game the queen merely remarking that a moment's delay would cost them their lives all the time they were playing the queen never

left off quarreling with the other players and shouting Off With His Head or off with her head Those whom she sentenced were taken into custody by the soldiers who of course had to leave off being arches to do this so at the end of a half an hour or so there were no arches left and all the players except the king the queen and Alice were in custody and under sentence of execution then the queen left off quite out of breath and said to Alice have you seen the mock Turtle yet no said Alice I

don't even know what a mock turtle is it's the thing mock turtle soup is made from said the queen I never saw one or heard of one said Alice come on then said the queen and he shall tell you his history as they walked off together Alice heard the king say in a low voice to the company generally you are all pardoned come that's a good thing she said to herself for she had felt quite unhappy at the number of executions the queen had ordered they very soon Came Upon a griffin lying fast asleep in

the Sun if you don't know what a griffin is look at the picture up lazy thing said the queen and take this young lady to see the mock turtle and to hear his history I must go back and see after some executions I have ordered and she walked off leaving Alice alone with the Griffin Alice did not quite like the look of the creature but on the whole she thought it would be quite as safe to stay with it as to go after that Savage Queen so she waited the Griffin sat up and rubbed its

eyes then it watched the queen till she was out of sight then it chuckled what fun said the Griffin half to itself half to Alice what is the fun said Alice why she said the Griffin oh it's all her fancy that they never executes nobody you know come on everybody says come on here thought Alice as she went slowly after it I never was so ordered about in all my life never they had not gotten very far before they saw the mock turtle in the distance sitting sad and lonely on a little ledge of rock

and as they came nearer Alice could hear him sighing as if his heart would break she pitied him deeply what is his sorrow she asked the Griffin and the Griffin answered very nearly in the same words as before it's all his fancy that he hasn't gotten her sorrow you know come on so they went up to the mock turtle who looked at them with large eyes full of tears but said nothing this here young lady said the Griffin she once forward to know your history she do I'll tell her said the mock turtle in a

deep Hollow tone sit down both of you and don't speak a word till I've finished so they sat down and nobody spoke for some minutes Alice thought to herself I don't see how he can even finish if he doesn't begin but she waited patiently once said the mock turtle at last with a deep sigh I was a real turtle these words were followed by a very long silence broken only by an occasional exclamation of from the Griffin and the constant heavy sobbing of the mock turtle Alice was very neatly getting up and saying thank you

sir for your interesting story but she could not help thinking there must be more to come so she sat still and said nothing when we were little the mock Turtle went on at last more calmly though still sobbing a little now and then we went to school in the sea the master was an old title we used to call him Taurus why did you call him tortoise if he wasn't one Alice asked we called him tortoise because he taught us said the mock Turtle angrily really you are very dull you ought to be ashamed of

yourself for asking such a simple question added the Griffin and then they both sat silent and looked at poor Alice who felt ready to sink into the Earth at last the Griffin said the mock Turtle drive on old fellow don't be all day about it and he went on in these words yes we went to school in the sea though you may not believe it I never said I didn't interrupted Alice you did said the mock turtle hold your tongue added the Griffin before Alice could speak again the mock Turtle went on we had the

best of educations in fact we went to school every day I've been to a day school too said Alice you needn't be so proud as all that with extras asked the mock Turtle a little anxiously yes said Alice we learned French and music and washing said the mock Turtle certainly not said Alice indignantly ah then yours wasn't a really good school said the mock turtle in a tone of great relief now at ours they had at the end of the bill French music and washing extra you couldn't have wanted it much said Alice living at

the bottom of the sea I couldn't afford to learn it said the mock turtle with a sigh I only took the regular course what was that inquire Dallas reeling and writhing of course to begin with the mock Turtle replied and then the different branches of arithmetic ambition distraction uglification and derision I never heard of uglification Alice ventured to say what is it the Griffin lifted up both its paws in Surprise what never heard of uglifying it exclaimed you know what to beautify is I suppose yes said Alice doubtfully it means to make anything prettier well

then the Griffin went on if you don't know what to uglify is you are a simpleton Alice did not feel encouraged to ask any more questions about it so she turned to the mock turtle and said what else had you to learn well there was mystery the mock Turtle replied counting off the subjects on his flappers mystery ancient and modern with seography then drawling the drawling master was an old Conga reel that used to come once a week he taught us drawing stretching and fainting in coils what was that like said Alice well I can't

show it to you myself the mock Turtle said I'm too stiff and the Griffin never learned it hadn't time said the Griffin I went to the classics Master though he was an old crab he was I never went to him the mock Turtle said with a sigh he taught us laughing in grief they used to say so he did so he did said the Griffin sighing in his turn and both creatures hid their faces in their paws and how many hours a day did you do lessons said Alice in a hurry to change the subject

10 hours the first day said the mock Turtle nine the next and so on what a curious plan exclaimed Alice that's the reason they're called lessons the Griffin remarked because a lesson from day to day this was quite a new idea to Alice and she thought it over a little before she made her next remark then the 11th day must have been a holiday of course it was said the mock turtle and how did you manage on the 12th Alice went on eagerly that's enough about lessons the Griffin interrupted in a very decided tone tell

her something about the games now chapter 10. the lobster quadrile the mock Turtle sighed deeply and Drew the back of one flapper across his eyes he looked at Alice and tried to speak but for a minute or two Saabs choked his voice same as if he had a bone in his throat said the Griffin and it set to work shaking him and punching him in the back at last the mock Turtle recovered his voice and with tears running down his cheeks he went on again you may not have lived much under the sea I haven't

said Alice and perhaps you were never even introduced to a lobster Alice began to say I once tasted but checked herself hastily and said no never so you can have no idea what a delightful thing a lobster quadril is no indeed said Alice what sort of a dance is it why said the Griffin you first form into a line along the seizure pool lines cried the mock Turtle seals Turtles salmon and so on then when you've cleared all the jellyfish out of the way that generally takes some time interrupted the Griffin you Advanced twice each

with a lobster as a partner cried the Griffin of course the mock Turtle said Advance twice set to Partners change lobsters and retire in the same order continued the Griffin then you know the mock Turtle went on you throw the the lobsters shouted the Griffin with a bound into the air as far out to sea as you can swim after them screamed the Griffin turn a somersault in the sea cried the mock Turtle capering wildly about change lobsters again yelled the Griffin at the top of its voice back to land again and that's all the

first figure said the mock Turtle suddenly dropping his voice and the two creatures who had been jumping about like mad things all this time sat down again very sadly and quietly and looked at Alice it must be a very pretty dance said Alice timidly would you like to see a little of it said the mock Turtle very much indeed said Alice come let's try the first figure said the mock Turtle to the Griffin we can do without lobsters you know which shall sing oh you sing said the Griffin I've forgotten the words so they began

solemnly dancing round and round Alice every now and then treading on her toes when they passed too close and waving their Four Paws to Mark the time while the mock Turtle sang this very slowly and sadly will you walk a little faster instead of witting to a snail there's a purpose close behind us and he's treading on my tail see how eagerly the lobsters and the turtles all Advance they are waiting on the shingle will you come and join the dance will you won't you will you won't you will you join the dance will you

won't you will you won't you won't you join the dance you can really have no notion how delightful it will be when they take us up and throw us with the lobsters out to sea but the snail replied too far too fast and the evil look a scans said he thanked the witting kindly but he would not join the dance would not could not would not could not would not join the dance would not could not would not could not could not join the dance what matters it how far we go his scaly friend replied

there is another sure you know upon the other side the further off from England the nearest to France and turn that pale beloved snail but come and join the dance will you want you will you want you will you join the dance will you won't you will you won't you won't you join the dance thank you it's a very interesting dance to watch said Alice feeling very glad that it was over at last and I do so like that curious song about the Whiting oh as to the Whiting said the mock Turtle they you've you've

seen them of course yes said Alice I've often seen them at dinner she checked herself hastily I don't know where din may be said the mock Turtle but have you seen them so often of course you know what they're like I believe so Alice replied thoughtfully they have their tails in their mouths and they're all over crumbs you're wrong about the crumbs said the mock Turtle crumbs would all wash off in the sea but they have their tails in their mouths and the reason is here the mock Turtle yawned and shut his eyes tell her

about the reason and all that he said to the Griffin the reason is said the Griffin that they would go with the lobsters to the dance so they got thrown out to sea so they had to fall a long way so they got their tails fast in their mouths so they couldn't get them out again that's all thank you said Alice it's very interesting I never knew so much about a Whiting before I can tell you more than that if you like said the Griffin do you know why it's cold a Whiting I never thought

about it said Alice why it does the boots and the shoes the Griffin replied very solemnly Alice was thoroughly puzzled does the boots and the shoes she repeated in a Wandering tone why what are your shoes done with said the Griffin I mean what makes them so shiny Alison looked down at them and considered a little before she gave her answer they're done with blacking I believe boots and shoes under the sea the Griffin went on in a deep voice are done with a Whiting now you know and what are they made of Alice asked

in a tone of great curiosity souls and Eels of course the Griffin replied rather impatiently any shrimp could have told you that if I'd been the Whiting said Alice whose thoughts were still running on the song I'd have said to the porpoise keep back please we don't want you with us they were obliged to have him with them the mock Turtle said no wise fish would go anywhere without a porpoise wouldn't it really said Alice in a tone of great surprise of course not said the mock Turtle why if a fish came to me and

told me he was going on a journey I should say with what porpoise don't you mean purpose said Alice I mean what I say the mock Turtle replied in an offended tone and the Griffin added come let's hear some of your adventures I could tell you my Adventures beginning from this morning said Alice a little timidly but it's no use going back to yesterday because I was a different person then explain all that said the mock turtle no no the adventures first said the Griffin in an impatient tone explanations take such a dreadful time so

Alice began telling them her adventures from the time when she first saw the white rabbit she was a little nervous about it just at first the two Creatures got so close to her one on each side and opened their eyes and mouth so very wide but she gained courage as she went on her listeners were perfectly quiet till she got to the part about her repeating you are old father William to the caterpillar and the words all coming different and then the mock Turtle drew a long breath and said very curious It's all about as

curious as it can be said the Griffin it all came different the mock Turtle repeated thoughtfully I should like to hear her try and repeat something now tell her to begin he looked at the Griffin as if he thought it had some kind of authority over Alice stand up and repeat Tis the voice of the sluggard said the Griffin how the creatures order one about and make one repeat lessons thought Alice I might as well be at school at once however she got up and began to repeat it but her head was so full of

the lobster quadrile that she hardly knew what she was saying and the words came very queer indeed Tis the voice of the lobster I heard him declare you have backed me to Brown I must sugar my hair as a duck with its eyelids so he with his nose trims his belt and his buttons and turns out his toes that's different from what I used to say when I was a child said the Griffin well I never heard it before said the mock Turtle but it sounds uncommon nonsense Alice said nothing she had sat down with

her face in her hands wondering if anything would ever happen in a natural way again I should like to have it explained said the mock Turtle she can't explain it said the Griffin hastily go on with the next verse what about his toes the mock Turtle persisted how could he turn them out with his nose you know it's the first position in dancing Alice said but was dreadfully puzzled by the whole thing and longed to change the subject go on with the next verse the Griffin repeated impatiently it begins I passed by his garden Alice

did not dare to disobey though she felt sure it would all come wrong and she went on in a trembling voice I'd passed by his garden and marked with one eye how The Owl and the panther were sharing a pie the panther took pie crust and gravy and meat while the owl had the dish as its share of the treat when the pie was all finished the owl as a boon was kindly permitted to pocket the spoon while the panther received knife and fork with a growl and concluded the banquet what is the use of

repeating all that stuff the mock Turtle interrupted if you don't explain it as you go on it's by far the most confusing thing I ever heard yes I think you'd better leave off said the Griffin and Alice was only too glad to do so shall we try another figure of the lobster quadrile the Griffin went on or would you like the mock Turtle to sing you a song oh a song please if the mock Turtle would be so kind Alice replied so eagerly that the Griffin said in a rather offended tone no accounting for tastes

sing her turtle soup will you old fellow the mock Turtle sighed deeply and began in a voice sometimes choked with sobs to sing this beautiful soup so rich and green wading in a hot touring who for such dainties would not stoop soup of the evening beautiful soup soup of the evening beautiful soup beautiful soup beautiful soup soup of the evening beautiful beautiful soup beautiful soup who cares for a fish game or any other dish who would not give all else for two penny worth only a beautiful soup penny worth only a beautiful soup beautiful soup

beautiful soup soup of the evening beautiful beautiful soup course again cried the Griffin and the mock Turtle had just begun to repeat it when a cry of the trials beginning was heard in the distance come on cried the Griffin and taking Alice by the hand it hurried off without waiting for the end of the song what trial is it Alice panted as she ran but the Griffin only answered come on and ran the faster while more and more faintly came carried on the breeze that followed them The Melancholy words soup of the evening beautiful beautiful

soup chapter 11. who stole the tarts the king and queen of hearts were Seated on their Throne when they arrived with a great crowd assembled about them all sorts of little birds and beasts as well as the whole pack of cards the naive was standing before them in Chains with a soldier on each side to guard him and near the King was the white rabbit with a trumpet in one hand and a scroll of parchment in the other in the very middle of the Court was a table with a large dish of Tarts upon it

they looked so good that it made Alice quite hungry to look at them I wish they'd get the trial done she thought and hand round the refreshments but there seemed to be no chance of this so she began looking at everything about her to pass away the time Alice had never been in a court of justice before but she had read about them in books and she was quite pleased to find that she knew the name of nearly everything there that's the judge she said to herself because of his great wig the judge by the

way was the king and he wore his crown over the wig he did not look at all comfortable and it was certainly not becoming and that is the jury box thought Alice and those 12 creatures she was obliged to say creatures you see because some of them were animals and some were Birds I suppose they are the jurors she said this last word two or three times over to herself being rather proud of it for she thought and rightly too that very few little girls of her age knew the meaning of it at all however

jerryman would have done just as well the twelve jurors were all writing very busily on slates what are they doing Alice whispered to the Griffin they can't have anything to put down yet before the trials begun they're putting down their names the Griffin whispered in reply for fear they should forget them before the end of the trial stupid things Alice began in a loud indignant voice but she stopped hastily for the White Rabbit Cried Out silence in the court and the king put on his spectacles and looked anxiously round to make out who was talking

Alice could see as well as if she were looking over their shoulders that all the jurors were writing down stupid things on their slates and she could even make out that one of them didn't know how to spell stupid and that he had to ask his neighbor to tell him a nice muddle their slates will be in before the trial is over thought Alice one of the jurors had a pencil that squeaked this of course Alice could not stand and she went round the court and got behind him and very soon found an opportunity of

taking it away she did it so quickly that the poor little juror it was Bill the lizard could not make out at all what had become of it so after hunting all about for it he was obliged to write with one finger for the rest of the day and this was of very little use it left no mark on the Slate Harold read the accusation said the King on this the White Rabbit blew three blasts on the trumpet and then unrolled the parchment scroll and read as follows the Queen of Hearts she made some Tarts

all on a summer day the knave of Hearts he stole those Tarts and took them quite away consider your verdict the king said to the jury not yet not yet the rabbit hastily interrupted there's a great deal to come before that call the first witness said the king and the White Rabbit blew three blasts on the trumpet and called out first witness the first witness was the hatter he came in with a teacup in one hand and a piece of bread and butter in the other I beg pardon your majesty he began for bringing these

in but I hadn't quite finished my tea when I was sent for you ought to have finished said the king when did you begin the hatter looked at the March hair who had followed him into the court arm in arm with the Dormouse 14th of March I think it was he said 15th said the march here 16th added the Dormouse write that down the king said to the jury and the jury eagerly wrote down all three dates on their slates and then added them up and reduced the answer to Shillings and Pence take off your

hat the king said to the hatter it isn't mine said the hatter stolen the king exclaimed turning to the jury who instantly made a memorandum of the fact I keep them to sell the hatter added as an explanation I've none of my own I'm a Hatter here the queen put on her spectacles and began staring at the hatter who turned pale and fidgeted give your evidence said the king and don't be nervous or I'll have you executed on the spot this did not seem to encourage the witness at all he kept shifting from one foot

to the other looking uneasily at the queen and in his confusion he bit a large piece out of his teacup instead of the bread and butter just at this moment Alice felt a very curious sensation which puzzled her a good deal until she made out what it was she was beginning to grow larger again and she thought at first she would get up and leave the court but on second thoughts she decided to remain where she was as long as there was room for her I wish you wouldn't squeeze so said the Dormouse who was

sitting next to her I can hardly breathe I can't help it said Alice very meekly I'm growing you have no right to grow here said the Dormouse don't talk nonsense said Alice more boldly you know you're growing too yes but I grow at a reasonable Pace said the Dormouse not in that ridiculous fashion and he got up very socally and crossed over to the other side of the court all this time the queen had never left off staring at the hatter and just as the Dormouse crossed the court she said to one of the officers

of the Court bring me the list of the singers in the last concert on which The Wretched Hatter trembled so that he shook both his shoes off give your evidence the king repeated angrily or I'll have you executed whether you're nervous or not I'm a poor man your majesty the hatter began in a trembling voice and I hadn't begun my tea not about a week or so and what with the bread and butter getting so thin and the twinkling of the tea the twinkling of the what said the king it began with the tea the

hatter replied of course twinkling begins with a T said the king sharply do you take me for a dunce go on I'm a poor man the hatter went on and most things twinkled after that only the March Hare said I didn't the March hair interrupted in a great hurry you did said the hatter I deny it said the March hair he denies it said the king leave out that part well let any rate the Dormouse said the hatter went on looking anxiously round to see if he would deny it too but the Dormouse denied nothing

being fast asleep after that continued the hatter I cut some more bread and butter but what did the door mouse say one of the jury asked that I can't remember said the hatter you must remember remarked the king or I'll have you executed the miserable Hatter dropped his teacup and bread and butter and went down on one knee I'm a poor man your majesty he began you're a very poor speaker said the king here one of the guinea pigs cheered and was immediately suppressed by the officers of the Court as that is rather a hard

word I will just explain to you how it was done they had a large canvas bag which tied up at the mouth with strings into this they slipped the guinea pig head first and then sat upon it I'm glad I've seen that done thought Alice I've so often read in the newspapers at the end of Trials there were some attempts at Applause which was immediately suppressed by the officers of the court and I never understood what it meant till now if that's all you know about it you may Stand Down continued the king I can't

go no lower said the hatter I'm on the floor as it is then you may sit down the king replied here the other guinea pig cheered and was suppressed come that finishes the guinea pigs thought Alice now we shall get on better I'd rather finish my tea said the hatter with an anxious look at the queen who was reading the list of singers you may go said the king and the hatter hurriedly left the court without even waiting to put his shoes on and just take his head off outside the queen added to one of

the officers but the hatter was out of sight before the officer could get to the door call the next witness said the king the next witness was the duchess's cook she carried the pepper box in her hand and Alice guessed who it was even before she got into the court by the way the people near the door began sneezing all at once give your evidence said the king shant said the cook the king looked anxiously at the White Rabbit who said in a low voice your majesty must cross-examine this witness well if I must I

must the king said with a Melancholy air and after folding his arms and frowning at the cook till his eyes were nearly out of sight he said in a deep voice what are tarts made of pepper mostly said the cook said a sleepy voice behind her collar that door Mouse the queen shrieked out behead that door Mouse turn that door mouse out of court suppress him pinch him off with his whiskers for some minutes the whole Court was in confusion getting the door Mouse turned out and by the time they had settled down again the

cook had disappeared never mind said the king with an heir of great relief call the next witness and he added in an undertone to the queen really my dear you must cross-examine the next witness it makes my forehead ache Alice watched the White Rabbit as he fumbled over the list feeling very curious to see what the next witness would be like for they haven't got much evidence yet she said to herself imagine her surprise when the White Rabbit read out at the top of his shrill little voice the name Alice chapter 12 Alice's evidence here

cried Alice quite forgetting in the flurry of the moment how large she had grown in the last few minutes and she jumped up in such a hurry that she tipped over the jury box with the edge of her skirt upsetting all the jury men onto the heads of the crowd below and there they lay sprawling about reminding her very much of a globe of goldfish she had accidentally upset the week before Oh I beg your pardon she exclaimed in a tone of great dismay and began picking them up again as quickly as she could for

the accident of the Goldfish kept running in her head and she had a vague sort of idea that they must be collected at once and put back into the jury box or they would die the trial cannot proceed said the king in a very grave voice until all the jury men are back in their proper places all he repeated with great emphasis looking hard at Alice as he said so Alice looked at the jury box and saw that in her haste she had put the lizard and head downwards and the poor little thing was waving

its tail about in a Melancholy way being quite unable to move she soon got it out again and put it right not that it signifies much she said to herself I should think it would be quite as much use in the trial one way up as the other as soon as the jury had a little recovered from the shock of being upset and their slates and pencils had been found and handed back to them they set to work very diligently to write out a history of the accident all except the lizard who seemed too much

overcome to do anything but sit with its mouth open gazing up into the roof of the Court what do you know about this business the king said to Alice nothing said Alice nothing whatever persisted the King Nothing whatever said Alice that's very important the king said turning to the jury they were just beginning to write this down on their slates when the White Rabbit interrupted unimportant your majesty means of course he said in a very respectful tone but frowning in making faces at him as he spoke unimportant of course I meant the king hastily said

and went on to himself in an undertone important unimportant unimportant important as if he were trying which word sounded best some of the jury wrote it down important and some unimportant Alice could see this as she was near enough to look over their slates but it doesn't matter a bit she thought to herself at this moment the king who had been for some time busily writing in his notebook cackled out silence and read out from his book rule 42 all persons more than a mile high to leave the court everybody looked at Alice I'm not

a mile high said Alice you are said the king nearly two miles high added the queen well I shan't go at any rate said Alice besides that's not a regular rule you invented it just now it's the oldest rule in the book said the king then it ought to be number one said Alice the king turned pale and shut his notebook hastily consider your verdict he said to the jury in a low trembling voice there's more evidence to come yet please your majesty said the White Rabbit jumping up in a great hurry this paper has

just been picked up what's in it said the queen I haven't opened it yet said the White Rabbit but it seems to be a letter written by The Prisoner to to somebody it mustn't have been that said the king unless it was written to nobody which isn't usual you know who is it directed to said one of the jurymen it isn't directed at all said the White Rabbit in fact there's nothing written on the outside he unfolded the paper as he spoke and he added it isn't a letter after all it's a set of verses

are they in the prisoner's handwriting ask another one of the jurymen no they're not said the White Rabbit and that's the queerest thing about it the jury all looked puzzled he must have imitated someone else's hand said the king the jury all brightened up again please your majesty said the Nave I didn't write it and they can't prove I did There's No Name signed at the end if you didn't sign it said the king that only makes the matter worse you must have meant some Mischief or else you'd have signed your name like an honest

man there was a general clapping of hands at this it was the first really clever thing the king had said that day that proves his guilt said the queen it proves nothing of the sort said Alice why you don't even know what they're about read them said the king the White Rabbit put on his spectacles where shall I begin please your majesty he asked begin at the beginning the king said Gravely and go on until you come to the end then stop these were the verses the White Rabbit read they told me you had been

to her and mentioned me to him she gave me a good character but said I could not swim he sent them word I had not gone we must know it to be true if she should push the matter on what would become of you I gave her one they gave him two you gave us three or more they all returned from him to you though they were mine before if I or she should chance to be involved in this affair he trusts to you to set them free exactly as we were my notion was that

you had been before she had this fit an obstacle that came between him ourselves and it don't let him know she liked them best for this must ever be a secret kept from all the rest between yourself and me that's the most important piece of evidence we've heard yet said the king rubbing his hands so now let the jury if any one of them can explain it said Alice she had grown so large in the last few minutes that she wasn't a bit afraid of interrupting him I'll give him Sixpence I don't believe there's an

atom of meaning in it the jury all wrote down on their slates she doesn't believe there's an atom of meaning in it but none of them attempted to explain the paper if there's no meaning in it said the king that saves a world of trouble you know as we needn't try to find any and yet I don't know he went on spreading out the verses on his knee and looking at them with one eye I seem to see some meaning in them after all said I could not swim you can't swim can you he added

turning to the knave the knave shook his head sadly do I look like it he said which he certainly did not being made entirely of cardboard all right so far said the king and he went on muttering over the verses to himself we know it to be true that's the jury of course I gave her one they gave him two why that must be what he did with the Tarts you know but it goes on they all returned from him to you said Alice why there they are said the king triumphantly pointing to the Tarts

on the table nothing can be clearer than that then again before she had this fit you never had any fits my dear I think he said to the queen never said the queen furiously throwing an ink stand at the lizard as she spoke the unfortunate Little Bill had left off Riding on His slate with one finger as he found it made no Mark but he now hastily began again using the ink that was trickling down his face as long as it lasted then the words don't fit you said the king looking round the court with

a smile there was a dead silence it's a pun the king added in an offended tone and everybody laughed let the jury consider their verdict the king said for about the 20th time that day no no said the queen sentence first verdict afterwards stuff and nonsense said Alice loudly the idea of having the sentence first hold your tongue said the queen turning purple I won't said Alice off with her head the queen shouted at the top of her voice nobody moved who cares for you said Alice she had grown to her full size by this

time you're nothing but a pack of cards at this the whole pack rose up into the air and came flying down upon her she gave a little scream half of fright and half of anger and tried to beat them off and found herself lying on the bank with her head in the lap of her sister who was gently brushing away some Dead Leaves that had fluttered down from the trees upon her face wake up Alice dear said her sister why what a long sleep you've had oh I've had such a curious dream said Alice and

she told her sister as well as she could remember them all these strange Adventures of hers that you have just been hearing about and when she had finished her sister kissed her and said it was a curious dream dear certainly but now run into your tea it's getting late so Alice got up and ran off thinking while she ran as well as she might what a wonderful dream it had been but her sister sat still just as she left her leaning her head on her hand watching the Setting Sun and thinking of little Alice and

all her wonderful adventures till she too began dreaming after a fashion and this was her dream first she dreamed of little Alice herself and once again the tiny hands were clasped upon her knee and the bright eager eyes were looking up into hers she could hear the very tones of her voice and see that queer little toss of her head to keep back the wandering hair that would always get into her eyes and still as she listened or seemed to listen the whole place around her became a lie with the strange creatures of her little

sister's dream the long grass rustled at her feet as the White Rabbit hurried by the frightened Mouse splashed his way through the neighboring pool she could hear the rattle of the teacups as the March Hare and his friends shared their never-ending meal and the shrill voice of the queen ordering off her unfortunate guests to execution once more the pig baby was sneezing on the duchess's knee while plates and dishes crashed around it once more the shriek of the Griffin the squeaking of the lizard slate pencil and the choking of the suppressed guinea pigs filled the

air mixed up with the distant sobs of the miserable mock Turtle so she sat on with closed eyes and half believed herself in Wonderland though she knew she had butt to open them again and all would change to dull reality the grass would be only rustling in the Wind and the pool Rippling to the waving of the Reeds the rattling teacups would change to tinkling sheep bells and the Queens shrill cries to the voice of the shepherd boy and the sneeze of the baby and the shriek of the Griffin and all the other queer noises

would change she knew to the confused clamor of the busy farmyard while the lowing of the cattle in the distance would take the place of the mock turtle's heavy sobs lastly she pictured to herself how the same little sister of hers would in the After Time be herself a grown woman and how she would keep through all her riper years the simple and loving heart of her childhood and how she would gather about her other little children and make their eyes bright and eager with many a strange tale perhaps even with the dream of Wonderland

of long ago and how she would feel with all their simple sorrows and find a pleasure in all their simple joys remembering her own child life and the happy summer days