Why beautiful women are nuts: a co-created problem

I'm Dr Orion terban and this is psycha Better Living Through psychology and the topic of today's short talk is why beautiful women are nuts so this is a compliment to the episode that I recently released entitled why successful men are jerks from both gender perspectives it can often appear that the most attractive potential partners are unfortunately fundamentally flawed in other ways however what's interesting is that how they appear flawed seems to be predictably gendered like you don't often hear men complaining that beautiful women are do you and today I'm here to explain why that might

be the case I've already talked about the men now it's time for women to get theirs the reason why beautiful women are nuts is actually pretty simple here it is beautiful women are nuts because no one ever tells them the truth that's it there are some women out there who have never been told the truth in their entire lives like can you imagine you've been alive 20 30 years and you've never been told the truth can you imagine how distorted a model of reality you would have like you kind of have to feel sympathy for

these women now because they can be so out of touch with the way things actually work they can often be the engineers of their own dissatisfaction this is because while these women might not ever be at a loss for potential Partners eventually these guys are going to get so sick of their nuttiness that they're going to walk pretty is not sufficient compensation for crazy most guys have to learn that the hard way and these women end up snatching defeat from the jaws of success when they operate under bad models so how does that happen a

lot of these women are precociously attractive they hit puberty and they realize that everything changes men of all ages start looking at them differently treating them differently they start to stare not just the boys in their class but the boys dads as well and that can be terrifying and scary and exciting and confusing for young women to navigate they've just come into a great deal of power that they did nothing to earn and don't yet know what to do with and why would they they're chronologically just teenagers and they may be even younger than that

emotionally this isn't exactly a recipe for success and from that moment forward these women will never hear the truth from a man again this is because all these men want to her and the truth does not get you laid if being honest got men laid the world would become such a nicer place to live like overnight it would become so much better however women only reward the truth when it happens to coincide with what they want to hear and in this case they're still rewarding it because it's what they want to hear it just happens

to also be the truth which is something of a fortunate accident they're like Elementary School teachers who ask an apparently open-ended question to the entire class but are actually fishing for a very specific answer the entire time this is the only answer that will receive credit honesty does not get you laid unless the honesty is ex exactly aligned with the responses women have already decided get the credit and the likelihood of this happening especially over an appreciable timeline is vanishingly small only men who have an inordinate commitment to Integrity those who are able to put

an abstract principle ahead of their own self-interest or I don't know men on the autistic Spectrum are going to prefer honesty with all its social consequences to the prospect of a sexual relationship with a beautiful woman this is why why men lie when you punish the truth you're asking to be lied to if you appreciate the insights on this channel I would highly encourage you to get your hands on a copy of my book the value of others over the course of 432 pages I delve deep into my economic model of relationships and explain the

behavior of both men and women in the game of mating and dating I also provide a lot of actionable advice on how to get and keep more of what you want in the sexual Marketplace once you read the value of others you'll never look at relationships the same way again now available in ebook audiobook and paperback formats the links are in the description women of course don't like hearing this however I'm going to offer an analogy to help them understand why this likely isn't changing anytime soon imagine you work for a company it's a desirable

position and it pays very well you like your job however the only issue is that you have to deal with a really difficult manager he might be overcompensating for something maybe he has a fragile ego maybe he's a narcissist who knows all you know is that he really doesn't like being challenged like it doesn't matter if he's wrong it doesn't matter if there is an objectively more efficient or more effective or better way of doing things disagreement is construed as an attack and he responds to attacks with aggression you've seen it happen more than once

some well-meaning employee thinks she's making a helpful suggestion to improve outcomes and boom she's looking for a new job by the end of the day given that you're dealing with a person like this what are you going to do the next time he brings you an idea that you think isn't going to work are you really really going to put your livelihood on the line and try to correct him you know he's only going to fire you because he'll perceive this as an attack and he's not going to change his mind anyway speaking your mind

is not going to work and it's only going to harm your goals it would be pointless and masochistic to insist on the rightness of your perspective so if you're like most people what are you going to say you know boss that's a fantastic idea absolutely you know I can see how that could work to be honest it's probably too advanced for our design department so it might have to be finessed a bit but it's a genius idea must be while you're in charge sir and then you're going to walk away and try to do the

best with the ridiculous you've just been given do you understand most people are not going to unnecessarily expose themselves to risk and loss where there is no hope of a potential upside and that's exactly the situation most guys find themselves in when they tell the truth to women like the manager in my analogy most women are not going to change their minds when they hear the truth they've already decided what they want and consequently what they want to hear and they may already have a general model of reality that's been reinforced by years or Decades

of being lied to this is not something that typically can be disabused with words only with the accumulated consequences of many poor decisions like can you imagine the manager in my hypothetical scenario hearing a dissenting Viewpoint even one that was presented respectfully and saying thank you thank you for being honest with me I realize now that you're the only person who tells me the truth and that all of these Toadies and sycophants have just been telling me what I wanted to hear all these years for your courage and integrity I immediately promote you to the

position of my most trusted adviser of course this comes with a substantial raise and a host of other benefits so I hope that you'll accept like can you imagine when women are told the truth they are much more likely to get upset to feel offended and to terminate the relationship than they are to reward men with sex and privileges men figure this out pretty quickly like the employee in my scenario they figure well telling the truth isn't going to change this woman's mind and it certainly hasn't helped me get laid so I'm going to say

whatever the I have to say to make this work and then I'm going to walk away and try to do my best with the ridiculous I've been given to get what they want men learn to cater to women's models of reality and this is especially problematic when it comes to very attractive women because these models are much more likely to be founded on lies that other men who have also been trying to sleep with them have told them over the years for better or worse less attractive women don't seem to have this issue this is

not because they don't become upset or offended at the truth they often do but because men will actually occasionally tell them the truth because they don't really care if they don't get what they want from them I don't make the news I just report it so that's why beautiful women are nuts no one tells them the truth the only possible exception occurs when these beautiful women had very strong men in their households growing up they had a strong father or strong Brothers this is because these men might be the only men in the world who

aren't trying to them and because of that they may potentially be able to apply appropriate consequences to the Tantrums and emotional Fallout that can occur when you tell women the truth these men are these women's best chance of remaining in touch with reality unfortunately even though these fathers and brothers probably love and care for these women more than any other man does some of them still won't respond well to this accountability and they fall further and further down the rabbit hole into Wonderland so there you go men want to beautiful women and telling women the

truth doesn't get them laid so that's why beautiful women are nuts what do you think does this fit with your own experience let me know in the comments below and please send this episode to someone who you think might benefit from its message as it's Word of Mouth referrals like this that really help to make the channel grows and if you're looking to join my free Weekly Newsletter or book a paid consultation you can do so on my website the links are in the description below as always I appreciate your support and thank you for

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