hey what's up guys and welcome back to another Reddit confessions video and I'm excited because today's confessions are deranged and disturbing as the title says and I will continue to give my opinions on them since you guys liked it enough last time and comment down below if you agree with my opinion on the confession uh should they be guilty are they guilty should they feel bad about themselves or is it okay and uh yeah thank you so much for stopping by and just watching this video and before we get into it please like the video
And subscribe to the channel it's the Channel's goal to be at 500,000 subscribers so please subscribe to the channel and all right anyways without further Ado let's get into some deranged Reddit confessions I knocked a homeless guy unconscious because he tried to take my latte nobody will ever know but me I started a new job just over a year ago I worked 7 to three most days and I don't own a car so I usually walk from my apartment to my place of work the walk to work is mostly on main streets but there is
one Alleyway that I take to my to make my walk 5 minutes shorter next at this alley is a coffee shop my city has a noticeable homeless population and there are some people who hang out along the streets asking for food money Etc they are mostly harmless they don't get in people's way or harass anyone as far as I know but there is one guy we'll call him Bob Force implicity who hangs out outside of the coffee shop most days waiting for someone to buy him a coffee for years I've been in the habit of
treating myself to an ice latte every Friday so on my first Friday on the job I naively bought this man a coffee when he asked me to not realizing the big mistake I made I bought him an 8 oz hot black coffee the cheapest item on the menu and myself my usual 20 o Latte when I exited the coffee shop before I could hand Bob his drink he snatched my drink and walked off before I could Blink from that day on every time I passed the coffee shop Bob would cat me and yell at me
to buy my coffee occasionally he would even follow me down the alley and try to take my belongings I felt very threatened because that early in the morning there weren't many people around on the street which I think is why he did it when I passed that place in the evening he usually didn't say anything as more people were around usually Bob was completely harmless but he followed me down the alley more than a few times occasionally trying to take my belongings or my latte about a month after I started my new job I bought
my latte and walked down the alley Bob followed me down the alley only this time he managed to get really close to me and reached out to snatch the latte from my hand before I could think my other hand hit his jaw the thing is I'm a pretty big girl 5'11 and 155 PBS I run in lift weights so I'm athletic too I've never hit someone outside a classroom setting but I have some martial arts experience so I know The Knockout points and can throw a good punch I once knocked out a strong 280 lb
man on accident during a class so it was no surprise that this guy went out cold hitting the side of a building on his way down I think I saw blood on his face but I'm not sure because I kept walking nobody saw there were no windows facing the alley and we were far from the main roads since it was just past 6:00 a.m. not many people were out even on the main roads my actions that day were rash and I am in no way suggesting anyone do something similar because you never know who is
watching that said I haven't seen this guy anywhere near the coffee shop I highly doubt that I killed him but I think I scared him off I'm not sure how crime investigation stuff works but it's been a year and I've heard nothing as far as the world knows I an innocent and I plan on taking the Seeker with me to the Grave update after reading some comments I want to respond to some comment threads one since the incident I have stopped taking the shortcut to work and instead take the main roads an extra 5 minutes
isn't worth getting robbed lol there's usually at least somebody on those roads who will see if someone tries anything and the buildings all have Windows I've also invested in pepper gel since it's better for temporarily disabling an as salent rather than permanently injuring them in general this incident has made me a lot more cautious and aware of my surroundings so far an incident like this has not happened again two a bunch of people are saying this post is fake because there's no way someone as small as me can knock out a 280 lb man have
you all never seen a 511 155 lb woman I would attach a photo of myself if I could that would defeat the whole point of an ammenity but if you want a reference for what I look like I have a similar body to Katie Lei we are almost the same height and weight and she is not small I can bench my body weight and deadlift more than double my body weight also if you know anything about pressure point Theory you know that no amount of muscle or size will protect someone if you hit certain points
straight on when I knocked out the 280lb man he was standing perfectly still right in front of me I was being directed where to hit by my instructor and I put too much power behind it and knocked him out it's hard to hit the points correctly in real time unless you have lots of experience I have about 2 and a half years of experience but Bob was a lot more frail than that guy so he was easier to knock out even if I didn't hit the point on his jaw perfectly and all right guys I've
read a lot of comments on this post and a lot of people are saying she's innocent and I would have to agree with her because I mean it's not smart for her to walk down an Alleyway at 6:00 in the morning a lot of bad stuff could happen but this guy this homeless guy was getting way too close he was like she said multiple times trying to take her belongings and that's just not okay and I think it's safe to say that him or her punching him that op in this scenario is okay and I
wouldn't suggest doing it I wouldn't it's not not okay that she did it but it's better than the alternative of her getting hurt robbed or stolen from again so I think in this certain scenario it's not her fault and it's Justified and it's a decent confession to not tell anyone because you would probably go to jail for assault but interesting confession marrying for money sucks and I do not recommend it I married a 40-year-old when I was 19 started when I was 17 yes it was gross but that's what happened the only reason he married
me is because I was hot the only reason I married him is because he had money I actually do have other redeeming characteristics but he married me because I was hot I know this everyone knows this it doesn't feel great but I can deal with it we've been married 20 years four kids so we are stable and we have lots in common at this point and we do love each other but if I could go back and slap myself I would when nobody tells you or they try and you don't listen because you're a dumbass
teenager is that marrying like this means you will [ __ ] owe him for everything every goddamn day not just in the bedroom but in every other matter in your life the stuff you never imagine someone else trying to decide for you and you don't just owe him for the money it's a lot heavier than that you'll never say it out loud but you'll know the deal fundamentally unequal he'll pull rank at the most random times and it'll make you feel like you're falling through the floor I don't hate my life or anything I accept
that I made this bed and I have to lie in it but I wouldn't recommend it to anyone else my oldest daughter is 2 years younger than I was when I met my husband and I can't imagine and all right this one doesn't have a lot to input on but I think it's good advice for any of you guys out there and you're considering marrying young this person wouldn't recommend it I think that's a good set of rules so who knew snook can teach you some life lessons and that's what you subscribe to this channel
for but anyways on to the next one having a family is so incredibly overwhelming and exhausting highly overrated I am so deep into and sick of my lifestyle as a mom and a wife I wish I could just quit I have severe and untreated ADHD so that probably makes everything so much more extremely difficult and complicated but being motherly is no different just thinking about cooking every day for the rest of my life literally makes me feel sord I know it may sound extreme but I cannot imagine doing this for much longer I feel trapped
I wish I would have stayed true to myself and kept my promise to be the weird lonely animal lady I know it was my decision but I resent my husband for that sometimes and I feel like I'm ready to give up update thank you so much for all the replies this post has received I did not expect this many replies good or bad I'm thankful for you all I really wish I could just chat with every single one of you for you to share more I'm aware that this issue is entirely my mental health not
my family for all you are telling me I should do my family a favor and just leave or abandon them no I won't it is not the right thing to do and I struggle with regret enough now also I don't know why some people assume I hate my children I love them more than I have ever l anything would do anything to make their life better I literally want to K myself because I believe they will be better off without me I make Supernatural efforts every day to make sure they are clean fed cozy happy
and comfortable even if I'm dying inside this probably should be a whole different post and I will post about it all in the future but I do have significant lifelong trauma that I recognize I must address before my negative thoughts win I always found the thought of s word to be comforting but I now have little humans who depend on me so it really is not an option anymore I was able to get an urgent appointment and I'm really excited to start my healing Journey thank you all again and all right thank God for that
update or else that would be a very depressing post but I think this person is on the upward Trend hopefully but in my opinion I don't I think she has a lot of issues going on just from what I've read in that post and some of the comments but I think just the obvious thing to do is go get some therapy talk to someone about the feelings because like she said she felt a lot better after seeing all the comments because it makes you feel a lot better sometimes just to talk to somebody about how
you're feeling but if you keep that all bottled up it probably sucks also in the beginning she mentioned ADHD so I think it would be a big help if she has sever ADHD to go get that medicated or talk to someone about that cuz that could also lead to feelings of everything she listed so I think she should go get some ADHD medications not it doesn't have to be medications but just talk to somebody about it and talk to a therapist I think she can be on the upper Trend and thoughts and prayers to her
I went to the doctor today and paid with cash I'm pregnant I'm 17 and Pregnant I don't know who the dad is I went to a party a few weeks ago 8 to be exact my best friend begged me to go with her saying that I was being too stuck up I've never been to a party before mainly focusing on my clubs and work and her words struck a cord with me so I went we were dancing together drinking alcohol I'm used to like drinking since my parents introduced me and my siblings to it around
16 to 17 depending on how outgoing their kid is it's a safety precaution of hey this is what it's going to feel like don't go bumbling around the streets like this not to say that they let us drink every day the most we get is a light Buzz under their counsil and we only get that on special occasions that might have been unnecessary info but I'm a mess right now and the only reason I have any grammar is because I'm typing this on my phone anyway I started getting drunker and drunker and my friend peeled
away from me at one point and this guy slid up to me I can't remember what we talked about but he was kind of cute I know that I danced with him at one point the rest of it's a [ __ ] blur and I can't remember anything else I woke up naked with him in the guest room and that's about it my best friend told me later that I told her that I found a Hawkeye and to not look for me or some [ __ ] like that when I spoke to him he said
yeah we had sex as asked if we used a condom and he said he thinks we did he ends up dropping the bomb that he has a girlfriend and to not mention this to her I'm hung over and I'm so confused and I just had sex with someone for the third time in my life and can't remember [ __ ] so I just left after I got my clothes back on I missed my period felt different it's hard to explain but I felt so weird no morning sickness or anything that the Articles say but just
an awkward feeling I thought it was just stress from work or maybe getting sick my periods are normally very punctual they start early in the month and end 3 days in I did not get my period for eight [ __ ] weeks and thought it was stress I'm such a [ __ ] idiot like how did I not see any signs or some [ __ ] then I thought about it all I decided that I didn't want to use store-bought test because the ones in the store around where I live aren't very good I've heard
of a lot of people buying them and the test saying they're pregnant when they're actually not so today I went to the doctor and didn't use any insurance so that my parents didn't get any notifications or some [ __ ] I don't know how that works but I didn't want to take any chances I explained to him everything and he told me that they test me surprise surprise I've got a baby in my uterus what the [ __ ] am I supposed to do I'm sitting in my [ __ ] car and I was scrolling
on Reddit because I'm chronically online and saw the confession board and I just needed to tell someone anyone so I went this account and here I am I don't know if it makes sense anymore because nothing does I'm pregnant and I'm 17 and I don't even know the guy's name but I'm pregnant with this [ __ ] kid and he has a girlfriend apparently and I'm pissed off that my friend let me go somewhere with a guy and I'm so [ __ ] angry that I can't remember anything if anyone has advice or anything I'm
going to be in my car for a little while longer I don't think I'm going to a mainly because I know that if my parents get pissed off they'll still support their grandchild no matter what and it isn't the baby's fault that their mommy is such a dumbass when she gets blackout drunk apparently sorry for this being so long I just don't know anything anymore edit I've been reading and commenting and yeah you guys are really [ __ ] awesome genuinely this helps a lot with working out my thoughts to those who say to a
word I completely understand that but I don't think I want to about school I'm more than willing to graduate early I have enough credits my friends last social life overall was shitty the friend I told you about the party was [ __ ] was pretty much my only person I talked to adoption wise I think I'll look into that I think I'm being way too optimistic about the idea of taking care of a kid I just don't know if I feel like sobbing but I feel like doing nothing at all I didn't get tested for
anything transmitted but now that you guys brought that up I'll definitely schedule something because holy [ __ ] I didn't even think about that I have to go home if I stay out any longer then they'll get worried and I think I'll talk to my parents then I'm sorry for bringing this to Reddit and [ __ ] and I know I'm stupid about my choices and reasoning but I just wanted to get all that [ __ ] off my chest thank you guys again I may or may not continue to reply if not then I'm
driving back home and all right that's a very heavy post and she stopped posting in the comments shortly after that but a lot of people were commenting various different things um you know the mix some people to say a word some people to adoption some people to just keep the kid but that's a very heavy post and I don't really know how to comment on that but to be honest as I was reading through a few of these I think this I I think I'll keep this confession Series going on a little while longer because
is very relatable for I think a lot of people and it's a lot of real life accounts and if this is relatable to any of you it'll just make sure that it'll just make you know that you're not alone and stuff like that so I think I'll keep this confession Series going because a lot of this can be more relatable and just for any of you guys out there watching this you're not alone and uh yeah I lied to get my current job and it pays really well I 38f lied on my resume to land
a job I wasn't qualified for the initial interview went smoother than expected my fabricated qualifications seemed to impress them before I knew it I was advancing to the next round the job offer came and I accepted despite this sinking feeling in my gut as I stepped into the role reality hit me hard I was drowning in tasks I had no idea how to handle Panic set in as I struggled to keep up with the demands of the job I sought help online connecting with others in similar positions who generously shared their expertise day by day
I learned the ropes through trial and error slowly I started to grasp the intricacies of the job the feelings of being overshadowed began to fade as my confidence grew I persevered determined to prove myself worthy of the position 15 years have passed since that faithful decision I'm now a master at my job a testament to resilience and hard work the lie that got me in the door has transformed into a success story of my perseverance and growth a part of me is very proud of what I've been able to accomplish while the other side is
disgusted with me for cutting Corners I've never told anyone besides my husband and he even told me he doesn't believe I really did that edit I'm a senior fraud analyst now started off in collections and insurance disputes and okay I think this person is completely fine and doesn't even need a confession to be honest because sure she lied she cut Corners she got a job she wasn't qualified for but at the same time she learned how to do it and 15 years later she's still doing that job I think that is a testament for a
lot of things I think it's better to go in over your head than the opposite because you can learn a lot going in over your head I mean I didn't start making YouTube videos because I knew how to make the best YouTube videos I started off really bad and then slowly got better I mean it's a lot to get into but I think you can do that for anything and that's basically anything so that's kind of a motivation story almost and I don't think it's necessary to be a confession because she didn't cause any harm
to the company or anything else along those lines she only Built the company and obviously got promoted so good for her I often replace my alcoholic drinks with water without telling the people I'm drinking with I am 25 female I go out pretty often whether it be with my friends husband or family in college I drank heavily every weekend my tolerance became pretty high and then I started dating a guy that would drink way too much every night so I started being the sober one so I could drive us home each night fast for 3
to 4 years I'm married to a different guy that drinks responsibly and I still have replaced maybe 90% of my drinks with water we're just straight up didn't add alcohol to my drinks but said I did to not get questions and to feel more included the people I drink with don't know this last night my husband asked me to pour two shots of vodka but I poured one and put water in my cup we cheersed and drank them then he wanted a mix drink so I made vodka sodas except mine was just soda another time
I was on my friend's boat and there they're all plastered they were handing me white claw after white claw and I would sip on it here and there but when no one was looking I would pour mine into the water every so often so it looked like I was drinking them I don't really know why I do this to the extent I do I feel safe with the people around I just like being clear minded drinking and feeling fuzzy is unsettling to me when I go out especially if it's loud inside the bar I'll quietly
order with the bartender uh Diet Coke or Sprite then tell people it's a Jack and coat or vodka Sprite I also don't want to be the girl that never lets loose and has a good time I had my fun in college and I like to know I can get everyone home safe by the end of the night feels good to finally say something thanks for reading edit for more details I don't say I am having alcohol unless people ask I don't brag around them saying I am not drinking when I'm not if people assume I
am then great if they ask I just say it's something alcoholic I also only do this for a couple of drinks then actually just say I'm sobering up when I order a third or fourth so people know I'm not getting hammered the people I am around now don't drink a ton but they do drink enough to need a ride every once in a while the cost of white claw when you buy them in bulk is like five bucks no I don't feel bad for fake drinking three to four white Claws and dumping them out whether
I drink them or not then they spent money on them or we did usually cost of food SL drinks is split when we have a riverbat party having 20-some people asking why you're not drinking is exhausting and annoying this was one instance I just used as an example last thing I will genuinely have a glass of wine or a mixed drink here and there I'm not completely sober all the time I just don't drink a lot that's all and okay another one of these that it's just kind of uh I wanted to throw in here
um I think it's kind of crazy at least in America I'm not sure in Europe or other places in the world why not drinking is kind of taboo almost like not drinking with in Social settings is very taboo and people will ask you about it which I think is just kind of weird how kind of normalized drinking is and so this kind of brought up a good point so I like this confession even though it shouldn't really be on the confession I can't take these self- diagnosed mental health issues anymore I am a 33f ADHD
diagnosed wound got the diagnosis in 1996 after almost failing school the whole treatment I was subjected to was to help me control symptoms and live better in society not inconvenience myself and others have some real autistic friends with the same Outlook now in the past goddamn 7 years I have to listen to Absolute nonsense in the internet all the time a bunch of self-diagnosed people that just use their madeup mental diseases as excuses that makes the community look so bad I can't tell any employers I have ADHD because they'll presume I will refuse to show
up to work and say I have a mental illness and be a completely entitled and unmanageable mess I've seen people using ADHD to justify screaming with their Partners cheating not delivering prom promises being lazy not putting any effort ah no please my roommate is a 26-year-old wrote me a message calling my hene concerning and me disrespectful because I left a dish in the sink overnight when I confronted her and said she can't talk to me this way she started crying like a big baby and said she doesn't know how to express herself because of her
autism is she a card Blan for you do absolutely [ __ ] for with no consequence now I have actual autistic friends they have issues looking me in the and knowing want to talk but all of them every single one can take accountability when you inform them I just can't take this [ __ ] anymore another roommate would make my life miserable with every [ __ ] little sound because he had misophonia like the light switch sound in your room would make him bashing his never went to a [ __ ] doctor and now if
I complain I won't live in a complete silence from 8 I'm in the non-accommodating monster there's no goddamn accountability and discomfort anymore every possible inconvenient feeling now had it at CID meanwhile I'm the only one actually mentally ill with years of therapy slm medication and I definitely wouldn't be caught dead doing [ __ ] like that I have dignity doesn't matter if my ADHD makes it hard to remember [ __ ] it's my responsibility to write it down and make it I took a commitment where's the accountability edit going to put an edit here I
didn't think I would need if you're thinking well I'm s diagnosed and don't do those things then this post isn't for you this post is specifically about people that behave in that specific Manner and cover it up with a a CID not all the mentally ill also I'd recommend always trying to get a diagnosis because symptoms of understood mental issues like autism and ADHD manifest in everyone in different shapes and forms I've heard from three different friends that they are afraid they have ADHD because of executive dysfunction issues they were just burnt out can be
bad anxiety can be trauma different solutions I didn't realize skinny privilege was a thing until I went from obese to fit and I absolutely hate it so I 21 female have been on a weight loss Journey since New Years I went from obese 54 and 187 lbs to fit I remember when I was bigger I got treated awful even by some friends I got called a whale was the punch line to a lot of fat jokes was always talked over told I was knowing Etc I was also told to go to the gym multiple times
but when I did I was told to go home and eat a burger because we all know you're not going to stick to it by gim bro overall I felt awful about myself and my mental health was in shambles the night before New Year's my fiance 23m and I got invited to a party when we got there my friend's boyfriend had already had too much to drink and out of literally nowhere he called me an annoying ugly fat bee and implied I was the duff I started crying and realized enough was enough I've been called
fat for the last time on new years's I got my calories down to 1,200 and started going to the gym five times a week slowly the weight started to fall off but got more rapid the longer grows on the diet also developed a pretty bad Ed and body dysmorphia along the way but recovered after a few months of therapy now in November I'm 129 lb having lost nearly 60 lb I've been pretty overweight since I was about 13 it was so used to the treatment I had prior that I had no idea how things would
change for me I went from being talked over to everyone stopping and letting me talk I went from being called Annoying to chill I went from being rejected by several men and even laughed at for having the audacity to shoot my shots to men coming out to me and asking for my number I went from being the only one men didn't introduce themselves to to one of the first one at bars when my fiance and the other guys in our group would walk off and do their own thing I went from being called fat to
beautiful I went from being invisible to noticed essentially the treatment I've been getting for the past few months is nothing I've been used to especially being bullied pretty badly in middle and high school and as much as I love being included now I can't help but to feel awful for my bigger self I deserve the same love and respect when I was bigger because I'm the same person now of the sudden that I'm skinny I'm the center of attention and finally seen it makes me terrified to gain weight again and go back to being the
Duff and treated so badly I wish Society judged us on our inner beauty rather than our outer I did unfortunately find out skinny privilege was real and I absolutely hate it my girlfriend was poking holes in my condoms I M25 and my now ex-girlfriend is F22 we've been together for a few years and everything was going great until she started pressuring me to get married and have kids I wasn't ready for that kind of commitment and I have made it clear to her however she wouldn't let it go she kept bringing it up trying to
convince me that we should take our relationship to the next level I felt suffocated and stressed out by her constant nagging then one day I discovered something that completely shattered my trust in her I found her her poking holes in the condoms we were using I was shocked and angry beyond words it felt like a huge betrayal of my trust in our relationship I confronted her about it and she tried to downplay it saying she just wanted to speed things up because she knew I was hesitant about having kids but I couldn't believe her excuses
I couldn't be with someone who would manipulate me like that so I ended things with her it was one of the hardest decisions I've ever had to make but I knew it was the right thing for me I couldn't stay with someone who didn't respect my boundaries and would go behind my back like that some of our mutual friends are saying I overreacted and that breaking up with her was too harsh but I can't shake that feeling that I dodged a bullet and all right wow I know I didn't add my uh kind of reaction
to the past two but this one was easy to add a reaction to I think it's insane that his mutual friends are saying he overreacted this is crazy how in any world is he overreacting poking holes in his condoms like come on that is the complete like almost not definition but that is a complete lack of trust and just that is crazy and this guy did dodge a bullet and I'm glad he ended things because that lady's crazy I slapped a child in the face and then shoved him off his scooter I'm 25 so I
have a beloved kitty named pixie she was around 4 when I found her on the street she had a rubber band tightened on half her tail I spent 2 weeks feeding her until she was comfortable enough to let me near her she didn't trust anyone I took her in cleaned her up and got the dead portion of her tail amputated after 5 years she finally warmed up to people she became so sweet and friendly it took her years to be comfortable around strangers last month she was out for her daily stroll around the neighborhood and
immediately came back in through the kitty door 20 minutes later usually she is out and about for about 2 to 3 hours she had two small holes in her chest and one near her butt she was completely frightened and was crying SL meowing she wouldn't even let me go near her for the first 5 minutes I knew for certain that she was shot with metal bbb's I take her in my car and start driving to the vet but took a quick detour around the neighborhood I was going to take the long way to see if
I could find the culprit sure enough I see a kid on a scooter standing on a driveway with a co2 powered BB gun aiming in the drainage cavity by the sidewalk I see cats in there all the time it was then then I knew who the culprit was I parked the car got out walked over to him and said I'm telling your parents that you were shooting cats he replied they are pests they told me I could the smug little look on his face threw me over the edge I slapped the [ __ ] out
of this [ __ ] and kick sweeped his legs out from under him and watched him fall flat on his ass I then picked up his gun and smashed it on the ground a small part of me wanted to finish him off with a stomach kick for good measure but I'm [ __ ] 25 so I looked both ways before crossing the street and [ __ ] bolted as I hopped in my car and sped away I heard him shrieking in the distance my kitty was treated and she's doing okay she is a lot more
skittish and spends less time outside edit in case you're wondering I'm pretty sure the cops were called when I came back I saw a few strolling around I was sure I was done I've never been in trouble or done [ __ ] like that anyways I drove by and literally nothing happened it's been a month I think I'm good and all right I this one's I think this guy went a little bit too far to be honest I mean like he said he's 25 years old and he slapped the [ __ ] out of a
kit and even considered doing more broke his gun broke his toy or whatever like it's understandable you should not shoot a cat especially someone's pet but if you're 25 a grown man you can't be beating up little kids and I'm surprised the cops didn't find where he lived or stuff like that because CU that's a pretty big offense in my opinion so I think let me know down in the comments below if you agree with me but I think he went too far and should have just called the cops on the kid and not beat
the [ __ ] out of him the woman I married is not the woman I have loved the most I've been with my wife for 14 years she's an amazing spouse partner and mother she's a great woman and I'm happy with the beautiful family we've made that being said My One True Love was a woman I was with right before I met my wife this woman and I dated for 3 years she changed my life with her love she introduced me to so much when we were together everything was electric I could listen to her
talk for hours and just enthralled by her she was the only person I trusted enough to pour my heart out to even my wife I can't do this with she was my perfect match compatible in every way no one has made me laugh like her made me feel pure unadulterated happiness as her and I've have never been with a lover that I have felt as physically and emotionally connected as her if there are soulmates she was mine in the short time we were together we planned out our lives together forever unfortunately she needed to leave
the country her parents were killed in an accident killing her father and leaving her mother in need of care I was serving military commitment fresh out of college and I couldn't go with her we tried to make it work but when it came clear we wouldn't be together for another three years she became more withdrawn after the accident and resented me for not being able to be with her I could feel the separation was slowly destroying us so I set her free it broke me but it seemed like the best thing for both of us
I don't think I'll ever forget our time together as much as I love my wife I know the love between us is not as real as me and my ex's love I married my wife out of convenience and I grew to love her a few years back I got into contact with my ex again she was married too with kids but she has also never forgotten is still in love with me and wishes things could have been different we talk sometimes nothing is in if inappropriate I of course would choose my wife and family over
her anytime but if I saw her in person again I'd be lying if I said I wouldn't be worried something inappropriate might happen my stepdad got in a fight to protect me and I feel different about him now sorry if this doesn't belong here I don't have anyone else can tell I'm 19 and a guy my Mom married my stepdad when I was 14 and we've always got along my dad died when I was 11 and to be honest I'm still working through the relationship we had I've always had this fantasy that he was an
amazing dad but if I'm honest he was abusive he made me fight a 13-year-old when I was 10 when I said I was scared he told me I was being a [ __ ] when I didn't win he was disappointed at me when my mom married my stepdad we kept to ourselves at first but he's honestly twice the man my dad was it's it's hard to say that but it's true the one thing he said to me before he married my mom was that he never hurt us and always protect us it's been 5 years
and he's kept his promise he's always been amazing to my mom and me and I admit that he spoils me sometimes he'll take care of my chores for me and gets me whatever I want even if I didn't ask him for it if he hears me talking about something he'll just get it for me he always asks if I have enough money and if I don't he'll transfer money into my checking account we don't really talk about personal stuff but he's always said I can talk to him about about anything whenever I feel like it
today we were at the store and some older guy accused me of giving him a dirty look while we were in the parking lot I didn't know what he was talking about and told him I didn't even look at him but he shoved me to the ground my stepdad jumped in so fast that I didn't even see what happened I heard him hit the guy and when I got up his [ __ ] was on the ground looking scared and holding his nose my stepdad was shouting at him in a scary voice you don't ever
put your hands on him he held me up and the guy got back in his car and sped away after that he didn't want me to leave his sights in the store the whole way home he kept apologizing that he didn't step in earlier and telling me he never wanted me to see him fight I've never even seen him get mad or raise his voice it was scary but it also made me feel so weird I can't explain it but it feels like I finally know how much he loves me we never say it to
each other but I always know how he feels when we got home I told him I love him for the first time he gave me the hardest hug I've ever had and I almost started crying I've lied to everyone in my life for 20 years that I'm Jewish I'm not Jewish not even a little bit if you asked me any questions about Judaism I couldn't tell you but still everyone thinks I'm Jewish it all started in high school 11th grade I had just moved from California to the South and it was a rough time I
was called every horrible name in the book because I talked different and got the [ __ ] beat out of me multiple times Well I slowly befriended some of the guys on the football team and my close friend was a center we'll call him Greg Now Greg is a super chill guy compared to everyone around him but he's still very very racist and very open about all of his opinions well one day I'm driving Greg and a few other football players home from school and he makes a comment about synagogues without even thinking I mentioned
that I've been to one and this is where it all started this prompted one of the other guys to just joke that I was a Jew and trying to be chill since these were the only friends I had I went ha yep I'm Jewish and then that's when it all went downhill Greg told everyone on the football team how his new friend from California was a Jew and they all believed it since most of them thought they were only Jews in California anyways and the football players spread that to the rest of the school at
this point I still thought it was a joke and everyone was just jokingly call me Jewish so I just kept going with it then I became known as the Jewish kid and started to actually become popular since everyone wanted to be friends with a different kid in the fact my dad had money IE lot compared to the poor area I went to to school so I could afford to buy nice things and people tend to be attracted towards that and so being Jewish almost became my identity it became who I was so whenever someone asked
my religion I just automatically told them I was Jewish fast forward to the end of high school and the counselors are walking people through scholarship stuff my counselor calls me to his office and hands me a slip for $5,000 Jewish American scholarship now as soon as I read Jewish American scholarship I was going to walk out and throw it out but he made me sit down and fill it out with him and then took it from me to submit it I felt horrible for even doing it but somewhat relieved when I heard that they only
give it to people who were also ethnically Jewish so I knew I wouldn't get it I got it I received a letter in the mail saying I was chosen as the winner of this $5,000 scholarship I got accepted to Dartmouth due to the fact I worked my ass off in high school was a v Victorian though my competition wasn't plentiful to say the least but I never thought I would have been able to afford it but this scholarship was huge in helping me towards that I considered spilling everything then declining the scholarship telling everyone at
school telling almost every single form I filled out saying I'm not actually Jewish I decided to tell my dad and ask him for advice as he's always been a guy you can talk to about anything whatsoever so I tell him everything I tell him about the joke then the LIE then everything and now the scholarship which I hadn't told any of my family about because one I never thought I'd get it and two they question why a very non-jewish person is getting a Jewish American scholarship and as soon as I told my father he looked
me dead in the eyes with the most serious disappointed face and then burst into tears laughing the way he reacted it must have been the funniest thing he's ever heard in his life he told me he had gotten a letter in the mail asking if I was ethnically Jewish for a scholarship I had entered and being the person he is he just said the chance for college money and went yep Jewish and that was apparently all they need so my dad convinced me to keep the money and go to my dream college and I did
as soon as I arrived at University I was met with some people from the group that gave me the scholarship some Jewish American organization funded by wealthy Israelis and they told me enlisted me into all these Jewish clubs and they told me to get set up in the synagogue and I everyone there I'd later learn two of the people there would be my professors who were very Jewish and finally they told me they'd set me up with the whole Birthright thing where they fly American Jews out to Israel I was so shocked I was at
my dream school plus I was being hit with all of this it was too much I thought about coming clean a lot of times but I feel like all the people around me would suddenly feel betrayed and leave me I became good friends with a lot of people in these Jewish clubs I bonded with my teachers a lot better since they believed I was Jewish I met the most beautiful Jewish girl who I met through her mother when she came up to me in a cafe asked if I was Jewish since I was with the
local Rabbi I said yes and she told me that I love her daughter we went on a date and instantly hit it off and I got a free trip to Israel all the while I was dealing with severe depression since I felt horrible every second of it every day in addition to the already enormous amounts of stress University puts on you I came so close so many times to just throw myself off a bridge or top building but I could never bring myself to do it I managed to get all the way through 11 years
of college to get my doctorate got a job at a history museum back on the west coast married that Jewish girl had a Jewish wedding with her entire family and my two parents my dad had spilled the beans to my mom about two days after I told him she also found it equally as funny we've had three little Jewish babies the museum put me in charge of organizing and a huge Holocaust Jewish American history exhibit even though that's not my specific field even in the slightest and in a few months when the current curator retires
at the age of 96 I will hopefully be taking his place he's been training me for the job I've worked there the longest and I've made sure that I'm damn good at my job my life has turned out great but deep down it will always haunt me that my entire life is built on a lie my kids' lives my life my wife's life all came from a joke in a car 20 years ago I was never going to tell Soul about this but today my oldest son he nine told me that he doesn't think he
believes in God and I told him I agreed it was the first time in 20 years that I was told the truth about my religion and didn't lie my son wanted to tell his mom that he doesn't want to continue being Jewish and I might use this as my way of getting out as well I told him that we tell her tomorrow at dinner and he seems almost as excited as I am but equally as nervous wish us luck I guess I still am unsure if I should tell her the whole whole truth or if
I should just leave it with that I no longer want to be Jewish edit just for clarification because people have been questioning my use of the word university in place for college yes I know they're not the same thing I've just been surrounded by British people lately and they all use universities so I've been saying that instead of college it's a recently adopted habit and I can assure you I'm American born in fulam California moved to Orange County and then to Santa Clara California where I lived from my was in my younger life until my
family moved to Americas Georgia I I can assure you I'm definitely American and as for my wife not finding out for my side of the family it's mainly due to the fact that we don't talk to my side of the family for personal reasons and I haven't talked to them in years and she's only ever met with them once at the wedding but she also wants nothing to do with them I've decided I'm just going to tell her I'm not Jewish I won't tell her I've lied about being Jewish for all these years but I'm
not going to tell her that I'm not Jewish someone also said that since both sides of my family are Czech there's a good chance I'm Jewish so I'm thinking of doing a DNA test soon also I said I know nothing about Judaism that was an extreme exaggeration I've obviously picked up a lot of knowledge over the years and I think my wife may have an idea due to the fact whenever a Jewish holiday is coming up she'll remind me about it and tell me when it is or what it's for and I don't know already
know I'll update later tonight on how it goes edit to so I talked to her and I decided to just tell her everything and didn't go like I expected she told me she had a feeling I wasn't Jewish from the beginning but never married me just because I was Jewish but married me for me regardless of my faith she said that she was sorry that I felt like that I had to hide from her for so many years and that I don't have to pretend to be Jewish if I don't want to but like a
lot of people have commented I do feel sort of culturally Jewish now I definitely identify more as a member of the Jewish Community than I do any others we're not going to pressure any of our kids into Judaism and we're going to let them decide what they want to do for themselves and my wife and I agreed that it'd be for the best if we gave him back since all the opportunities afforded to me came from the Jewish Community we're going to get involved with an organization and we're donating to three different scholarships for $5,000
each and trying to help fun Birthright trips whenever we can I'd like to thank everyone who's commented with advice and hopefully this can be a new chapter in my life and all right guys that wraps up deranged Reddit confessions I hope you enjoyed the video I enjoy these confession videos are a lot of fun to record and just interesting so let me know down the comments below would you like to see more please like And subscribe to the channel I appreciate you all and uh this was snook and I'll see you next time