📕I Woke Up In The Bed Of My Crush, And She Told Me Not To Come Again Because She Had A Boyfriend

I got up from Willow's bed she lazily tossing my underwear at me. “I've changed the door code. Don't come over unless there's something important. I froze instinctively asking Why She smiled curling her lips. I promised to be his girlfriend yesterday. “I'm afraid he'll be upset if he sees you here. Chapter 1 When I opened my eyes my waist was killing me. No choice Willow really knew how to take what she wanted and she had this way of making you keep going—couldn't stop absolutely couldn't stop. Turning around she was already awake her beautiful shoulders and back

exposed to the sunlight Displaying a color that is white with a hint of red. Her eyes half-lidded radiating seductive charm. Why are you up so early Her voice still had a trace of huskiness from last night's restless fun. The stiffness in my waist made me frown. I bent down to put on my pants but realized that I had been too hasty yesterday—my zipper was completely ruined. Willow rolled over flicking her fingers at the white lace lingerie I had brought her yesterday tossing it back to me with a mischievous smile at the corner of her eyes.

Your taste really needs some improvement. You keep making me wear this old-fashioned white lace. Can't you get me something more fresh I caught the lingerie. Well then I'll buy you some new lingerie. What kind do you like But Willow interrupted me No need. I'm going to change the door code later. Don't come by unless it's necessary. I was stunned. I'd been seeing Willow like this for a year. At first she'd call me over every few days and later except for when she had to work late I'd practically lived at her place. We'd eat together watch

shows and when we got off work early we'd curl up on the couch to watch movies and eat popcorn and by the time the movie was over we'd be tangled up in each other. Like a real couple. Over time I had gotten used to this life. Sometimes I couldn't help but think maybe Willow had gotten used to me too. What if we could build a family together It would be so happy. But now she was telling me not to come over anymore. I instinctively asked Is your family coming over I can— She sat up looking

at me her lips curling up into a faint smile. No. I promised to be his girlfriend. It took me a moment to figure out who she meant. I had heard recently that a newly-graduated rich kid had been chasing after her like crazy. Over the years countless men had pursued her but she'd never agreed to any of them. I had thought that this rich kid freshly out of college was just seeking novelty naïvely thinking he could handle a woman like Willow so I hadn't paid much attention. I hoarsely asked Are you serious Willow smiled. Serious. He's

different from those other guys. George you don't know he's so sincere. Unlike many men I can tell what's on their minds with just one glance. She said this staring directly into my eyes. I gave a faint smile not responding. She continued “I don't want him to know about us. He'll be upset. Sunlight streamed in through the gap in the curtains blinding. It was so sharp it made me dizzy. Alright. After a pause I said calmly “Then I'll pack up and leave today. No need to hurry Willow smiled gently casually grabbing a pleated skirt and putting

it on. “Didn't you return your apartment Stay another couple of days and find somewhere else before you leave. I closed my eyes for a moment. The bitter pain in my chest exploded leaving me at a loss for words. No I'm leaving today. I wasn't sure why I felt so urgent. Willow was right—I really didn't have anywhere else to go. But I just wanted to leave immediately. I felt like Willow had stripped me bare leaving me to dry out in the sun. I was being swallowed up by shame. At Willow's place my things didn't take up

much space. Most of what I bought was for her convenience: appliances cookware bedding and a few miscellaneous decorative pillows. The house was decorated in a minimalist style and she had once said helplessly that ever since I moved in the place had gotten more cluttered. But my personal belongings could fit in a single suitcase. As I was about to leave Willow stopped me. She leaned against the doorframe one hand lightly resting on the door her body slightly tilted to one side. Her gaze held a faint smile and the corners of her lips curled up as she

said George you're not a kid anymore. You should find someone and settle down. From now on we're still friends. I understood what she meant and nodded. Alright. Chapter 2 The winter in South City is damp and cold not particularly low in temperature but the chill seems to drill right into your bones. It feels like it's snowing—icy wet flakes fall gently on the tip of my nose. I look up and the sky that had been clear a moment ago suddenly seems to darken. Countless tiny snowflakes fall with the wind. South City hasn't seen snow in years.

Since Willow and I came here it seems like snow has become a rare sight. I suddenly remember the snow from my hometown. A small coastal city in the north where every winter the humid sea breeze turns into heavy snowflakes falling all night. By the time the morning comes the snow can reach your knees and everything around you is a blanket of white. It's refreshing unlike the endless drizzling snow here in the south that makes people feel a little uncomfortable inside. I put my luggage to one side and decided to sit at a bus stop on

the side of the road to call home. My mom picked up the phone quickly her voice excited yet cautious George The cold air stung my nose and I rubbed at my sore nostrils. Mom I'm craving the dumplings you make. She responded happily “I'll make them for you Let me check the flights. It's almost New Year's so tickets might be hard to get— I interrupted her: No need Mom. I'm coming home for the New Year this year. She paused for a moment then her voice became bright with joy Really Mm I looked up. Snowflakes seemed to

get in my eyes. I blinked feeling my eyes dampen and said hoarsely Mom I'm planning to go back to my hometown. That afternoon I handed in my resignation. My boss tried to persuade me Is it because of salary You can tell us we can negotiate The department manager is moving on next year and you're the one with the most potential to get promoted. It would be a shame to leave now I smiled and shook my head. Thanks Mrs Laura but I want to go home and spend time with my parents. I've never been an ambitious

person. I don't have any dreams of being on top. I just want to live a peaceful life. I came to South City because of Willow. She wanted to develop her career here so I stayed with her without hesitation. I thought that as long as I spent enough time by her side she would eventually notice me. But it turns out love is something you can't force no matter how hard you try. On my way to the hotel a bookstore by the street was playing a song. A woman's voice sang with intensity "An adventurous love turned into

your puppet year after year only to realize how miserable you are." Loving to the point of compromise but in the end still no solution tying you down not letting you fly history keeps repeating and it's making me tired…” I listened quietly for a moment. The first time I met Willow I was 17. Now at 28 I had compromised for Willow for these years. I was about to turn 30. This 12-year-long absurdity should come to an end. Chapter 3 That night I dreamed of Willow as she was when she was a teenager. Willow at 17 transferred

to our small county's school in her second year of high school. At a time when most of the kids in the county were still awkward and scruffy she wore a black dress her long hair cascading down her shoulders her figure slim and elegant— She looked like someone from another world a model straight out of a fashion magazine. That afternoon almost all the boys in the grade crowded by the windows to stare at her. Within days even freshmen were delivering love letters to her. She became the school's new campus beauty. But she ignored everyone always sitting

alone at the back of the class sleeping. It seemed like she wasn't interested in anything. She didn't bring anything to class didn't listen to the lessons and the teacher didn't bother her. Occasionally during exams she would poke me on the back Hey let me copy your answers. She seemed to assume I wouldn't refuse. And I really didn't refuse. Because of that many girls didn't like her saying she dressed like that to seduce men. A lot of those bad boys with mixed-up boyfriends would constantly send her love letters and harass her making the girls jealous. For

several days I saw Willow come to class with handprints on her face. Until that day when I passed by and saw her being slapped by a group of girls in an alley. Her face was covered with dirt and bruises and there were bloody marks on her forehead. I didn't hesitate. I stopped my bike grabbed a brick from the side of the road and smashed it on the head of the girl leading the group. Seeing my aggressive demeanor the others scattered in fear. I threw the brick aside took out a Band-Aid from my pocket and handed

it to her Your face is bleeding. She lifted her head and shot me a cold glance Get lost. At that time I thought she was really annoying—couldn't even tell good from bad. What a jerk I didn't like her anyway. After that no matter how much she poked me for answers I ignored her. A month later fewer girls came to pick on Willow but the rumors about her in class increased. Some said the black dress she had only worn once was from an unheard-of brand costing more than 30 000 yuan. Some said she was a love

child her mother a mistress. That she and her mother had been discovered by her father's legal wife and her father had abandoned them. Her mother couldn't survive in South City so she had taken Willow back to her hometown. All the eyes on Willow—admiring dismissive or curious—had a hint of something subtle. One winter evening on my way home from school I passed that alley and found Willow lying on the ground. She seemed to have just been badly beaten. Her fingers were covered in blood and her beautiful face was bruised with blood dripping from her forehead. I

didn't want to help her but when I saw her lying there with her eyes shut in the snow The snow kept falling and she was almost buried in it her face pale. I was afraid she might actually die so I cautiously approached and poked her Willow are you okay She didn't respond. I panicked and took out my phone “I'll call 120 Only then did Willow open her eyes frowning Why is it you again I was a little annoyed but there was no time to argue “You're seriously hurt. Let me take you to the hospital. Mind

your own business she sneered then closed her eyes again. I didn't argue. I called 120. She was dressed too lightly just in a white knitted sweater so after hesitating for a moment I took off my black down jacket and covered her with it. Willow was stunned. As I left she called me. I turned around. My down jacket was an old style bought years ago and it looked a bit ridiculous on her. She stared at me coldly “Didn't you know my mom's a mistress I hopped onto my bike: “I've heard. So what Then why did you

save me Your mom is your mom. You're you I thought for a moment. Besides being a mistress might be bad but it's not a death sentence right Willow didn't respond her trembling eyelashes covered in snow as she stared at me. The sound of the ambulance grew louder and I waved my hand “Don't forget to return my down jacket. Chapter 4 After that Willow didn't come to school for a week. The girls who had bullied Willow didn't fare any better. After Willow's mother stormed into the school all of them were expelled. A week later Willow returned.

She handed me a blue down jacket turned her head and said Your jacket got ruined so I'm replacing it with a new one.” I didn't feel anything strange so I just accepted it. It wasn't until much later that I learned how much that down jacket cost. It could buy every piece of clothing I had ever owned in my life. From there things progressed naturally. Willow's attitude toward me slowly improved and I became the only friend she had in this small town. Before the college entrance exams Willow suddenly asked me George do you want to go

abroad I was taken aback and she lowered her head her ears turning red as she continued My mom plans to send me to the U.S. after the exams… do you want to come with me I smiled bitterly and said Young Miss how could my family afford to send me abroad Then where do you plan to go I thought for a moment and said Probably the capital. I'm afraid I won't adapt to the climate in the south. The capital is also closer to home I'd only need a few hours on a train to get back. Willow

reached out and tugged at my knitted cap pulling it over my eyes without saying anything else. Later the teacher asked us to write down our ideal universities and I thought Willow would write down a university in the U.S. But instead she wrote the same university in the capital as I did. I was surprised and asked Willow weren't you planning to go to the U. S. She leaned over her desk mumbling I suddenly feel like the U.S. isn't all that great. The capital isn't bad either. But three days before the exams Willow tore up that piece

of paper. When I asked her she just stayed silent. That night I found out that Willow's father's legitimate wife and son had both died in the same car accident. Her father asked her mother to bring Willow back and after losing a son he finally started paying attention to his only remaining daughter. He promised that if she stayed in South City he would give her mother a legitimate status and let her inherit the family business. Willow said she didn't care for her father's money but her mother slapped her crying as she said “Do you know why

I've suffered all these years For whom As long as your father marries me I won't be a mistress anymore. No one will be able to say you're the daughter of a mistress anymore In the summer when cicadas buzzed and made your head throb under the shade of a silver birch tree Willow lowered her head and wouldn't look at me I'm sorry George I can't go to the capital with you.” Her voice still carried a husky tone and her eyes were red from crying. I thought for a moment then lowered my head and gently patted her

on the head saying “It's okay. “Then I'll go with you to South City. Chapter 5 When I opened my eyes it was already morning. Maybe it was because I had been out in the snow yesterday but my head felt a little sore. However tonight is a friend's birthday and I've already bought the gift. I have to go. I picked up my phone and Willow's message was the first thing I saw. She sent me a picture of a Snoopy pajama set. I forgot to take my pajamas. Come get them tonight. That was the pair of pajamas

Willow had mistakenly ordered. She meant to buy one for me as a gift but she accidentally ordered two. So one for her and one for me. Whenever she wore them I would feel a fleeting sense of happiness thinking for a moment that she belonged to me even if only for a second. But now looking back it feels pitifully laughable. I typed a few words in response Throw it away. I don't need it.” She didn't reply. I flipped over and covered my eyes with my arm. After moving to South City many things happened to Willow. I

found out that her mother wasn't a mistress after all. It was actually Willow's mother who got together with her father first and she had Willow because she truly loved him. But later her father married a woman from a comparable family to form a proper alliance and abandoned them both. Even after marrying Willow's mother her father still spent his time fooling around with other women and even wanted to have more sons. Her mother's life was hard. She fought with her husband every day eventually falling into severe depression and committing suicide by jumping off a building. After

that her father seemed to have finally turned over a new leaf. He stopped looking for other women. But the rift between father and daughter was beyond repair. Willow never went back home after that. She started going to bars nightclubs and hanging out with all kinds of people in the entertainment industry. She drank partied until dawn and even learned how to smoke. The once pure cold and clean Willow seemed to vanish like a dream a fleeting illusion in my memory. Chapter 6 That night at the party I met Willow's new boyfriend for the first time. To

my surprise he was quite clean-cut and cheerful. He wore a light gray sweater paired with dark blue jeans his short hair neatly combed and a warm smile that gave off a sunny vibe. He wasn't particularly striking but his gaze was sincere. Willow was right. Compared to the other guys who had pursued her in the past he was truly different. However he came over and shook my hand with a smile saying You must be George right Willow talks about you all the time. She's such a liar though. She said you dress so old-fashioned and that you

look so poor but you actually look pretty classy We're both guys right Who doesn't know who It was clear he knew about my relationship with Willow and he was now teasing me. Just as I was about to say something Willow interrupted. She linked her arm with his and said Makoto this is your brother-in-law. The others immediately started teasing Brother-in-law you better treat Willow well. So many people have chased after our Willow over the years and no one's ever been able to win her heart. “When's the wedding I'll definitely give you a big red envelope Makoto

smiled calmly putting his arm around Willow in a polite gesture. Of course of course. Willow also hugged him back turning to the others and saying Alright if you didn't know any better you'd think I invited you here to play matchmaker. You'll scare my Makoto away I won't forgive you if you do that. Makoto can marry me whenever he wants. Her friends laughed Looks like you two are already singing in harmony What a love feast tonight We found a place to sit. In the past Willow would always sit beside me at these kinds of gatherings but

this time probably out of habit she sat to my left. Just as I was about to remind her Makoto walked up to me. He looked at me and said George could you please change seats After all you're still single. It's better to avoid sitting next to a woman with a boyfriend don't you think I was speechless. I was the one sitting here first but now it seemed like I was the one trying to take someone else's girlfriend. What kind of logic is that I glanced at the two of them and stood up moving to the

opposite side of the table. The night was lively and I had no idea how much alcohol was consumed. During dinner Makoto reached for the fish. Willow instinctively said “Aren't you allergic to fish Makoto went silent and my chopsticks also froze in mid-air. After a long pause Makoto's face darkened as he said Willow I'm not allergic to fish. Willow paused her brows furrowing slightly her eyes avoiding his as she said I must have remembered wrong. Makoto glared at her. “Who's allergic to fish Willow's face flushed with a faint pink and she instinctively bit her lip saying

I forgot I really don't remember. Makoto shot me a glance his expression darkening. Then without a word he placed the plate of fish in front of me his gaze cold as he said George this fish is pretty good. Try it. None of the other friends noticed the tension from before and in their drunken stupor one of them said Makoto you don't know George is allergic to fish. He can't eat it.” Makoto responded faintly Oh really As the alcohol flowed and everyone got a little drunk one of the friends blurted out Willow we all bet whether

you'd get married before turning 30 and who would've thought you'd find true love so quickly. Another friend also a bit tipsy squinted and giggled Yeah we all thought you and George would end up together. You two were so close. Makoto's face darkened like the calm before a storm. Willow quickly tried to cover it up awkwardly saying Really How could we ever be together We're just the best of friends you're so funny. She said this with a genuine laugh as if it were the funniest thing in the world. Her friends joined in the laughter Exactly now

we know. You two are just pure opposite-sex friends haha. I laughed along: Exactly. How could I ever end up with Willow That's too ridiculous. Willow walked over and poked me in the shoulder. She must have been drunk her face flushed her eyes a little glassy and she tilted her head asking George you don't really like me do you In that moment I wanted to read something in her eyes. But there was nothing. She just looked at me straight as if we really were just the “good friends” she had said. I smiled slightly “Of course not.”

“That's good. Willow nodded then lightly tapped my shoulder “We're just the best of friends. Despite all the alcohol I had drunk I'd never felt this clear-headed before. I repeated Yeah the best of friends. Chapter 7 The next morning I bought a direct flight ticket home. Before boarding I checked my phone one last time. Willow had posted a new status on her social media a picture of her and Makoto together with no caption—just their hands interlocked. It was an official announcement. Below were all the congratulatory messages from their friends. I stared at it for a while

then took out my SIM card and threw it in the trash. Going home seemed easier than I had imagined. My parents picked me up. It was nearing the end of the year and the streets were lined with red lanterns. Stores played “Gongxi Facai” by Andy Lau. It wasn't as bustling as South City but the lingering scent of fireworks and firecrackers made me feel unexpectedly at ease. My mom was ecstatic because I hadn't been home for the New Year in three years all to accompany Willow. But after a while she couldn't help but start nagging “You're

almost 30 this year why haven't you made any progress “The neighbor Sam's son is even a year younger than you and already knows how to buy groceries. Oh I went to see him the other day—he's so chubby really cute. “The young man at your mom's work is going on blind dates. Oh and our neighbor just got a really pretty girl. I'll introduce you to her okay My mom was looking at me carefully as she spoke. I used to hate blind dates. For all those years I liked Willow she was the only one in my heart.

After that messy night when our relationship became complicated I thought I had a chance and I only saw her in my mind. So whenever my parents brought up blind dates or marriage I wouldn't listen. But this time I looked out the window at the red paper scraps flying from the fireworks and suddenly felt so tired. I was exhausted. Maybe settling down isn't so bad after all. I said Okay. “You don't always have to resist so much. I know you like that girl Willow but what did you say I nodded and said I said okay introduce

me to her. Chapter 8 After dinner that night I habitually picked up my phone but I received a WeChat call from Willow. I had already switched to a new WeChat account but many of my old friends were still on the old one so I still logged into it every now and then. She seemed to have completely forgotten what had happened these past few days and spoke as if everything were normal “Why can't I get through to your phone anymore Before I could answer she continued Never mind I've already prepared everything for the New Year. Do

you need anything special I suddenly remembered the year Willow's mother had just passed away. That year I went back to my hometown for the New Year. On the night of New Year's Eve I called Willow on video wanting to wish her a happy New Year in advance. The video call took a long time to pick up and when the screen lit up it was pitch black except for a small dim red-orange light slowly fading away. Willow's voice was hoarse as if the cold wind had seeped through the cracks: “What's up Once the screen adjusted to

the light I realized that Willow was sitting alone on the balcony surrounded by scattered empty bottles. Outside the window the city was full of lights and fireworks exploded in the sky. But all that noise and festivity seemed irrelevant to her. She just sat there alone on the windowsill watching the perfect lives of others drowning in solitude in the night. At that moment I suddenly felt an overwhelming sense of pity for her. My throat tightened and I forced a smile “I'm wishing you a Happy New Year in advance. Got any red envelopes for me She seemed

to chuckle lightly and soon the sound of a transfer notification echoed. She had transferred 100 000 yuan to me. I was stunned and after a long pause Willow suddenly said George when are you coming back I… Her voice was lost to the wind and I couldn't hear the rest of her words. I didn't know if she was trying to say “I'm lonely” or “I miss you.” I couldn't think of anything else. I quickly told my parents there was an urgent matter at the company then bought the next available flight back to South City. At 3

AM South City was still as lively as ever the streets full of neon lights and cars streaming by without end. But Willow's apartment was completely dark. Panting I rushed upstairs and knocked hard on her door Willow open the door I thought Willow had already gone to bed but to my surprise she opened the door quickly. She stared at me completely stunned. “You—” she froze in place. How did you come back I smiled and said “I came to spend the New Year with you.” Willow didn't say anything just kept staring at me. Just when I was

starting to feel awkward under her gaze she suddenly threw her arms around me. She held me so tightly as if trying to bury all her pain in my arms. Her head rested on my shoulder and silent tears soaked into my shirt. From that moment on every year I would spend the New Year with Willow before going home. It had become an unspoken habit between us. But this year I hadn't expected her to already have Makoto by her side and yet she still came to find me to spend the New Year together. I glanced out the

window and softly said “I'm going back home. Willow froze. She didn't seem to expect me to say that. After a moment she replied Yeah it's been years since you've gone back home for the New Year. You should go visit. Mm. I gripped my phone tightly. There was a silence on both ends of the call and I vaguely heard Makoto's voice Willow come over here I fixed the hot water. You can take a shower now. “I'm coming. Willow responded. I replied indifferently “I'm hanging up now.” “Mm.” Her voice was unreadable. I pulled the phone away from

my ear and pressed the hang-up button. The screen went dark. Chapter 9 I thought I wouldn't be able to sleep but to my surprise I passed out as soon as my head hit the pillow. When I woke up it was already past 2 AM. I had woken up because I was thirsty. The dry cold air of the northern winter was still something I wasn't used to after just returning. I went downstairs to the kitchen to get a glass of water but as I was about to head back upstairs I suddenly heard a faint noise coming

from the bathroom. A thief had broken into my house My whole body tensed up and the hairs on the back of my neck stood on end My heart was racing and after a moment of hesitation I grabbed the rolling pin from the table. Just as I was about to reach the stairs near the bathroom the bathroom door suddenly opened I was so startled my scalp tingled. Instinctively I swung the rolling pin down hard. The figure inside nimbly dodged it and quickly moved out of the way. In that one glance I realized that the thief was

a woman and she was dressed very… minimally only in her underwear Damn not only did this thief break into my house but she wasn't even wearing clothes I immediately dropped the rolling pin grabbed her left wrist with my other hand and pressed her against the wall restraining her. But to my surprise this thief was very refined and there was a faint scent of lavender on her. However the next moment she suddenly began to struggle violently. She twisted her body and reached up with her right hand to grab my face and I instinctively bit down on

her arm. She was trying to escape I quickly grabbed her right hand and held both of her hands tightly. She suddenly started begging in a tearful voice Please let me go My clothes are in the living room and the money I stole is from my dad's secret stash—probably around 2 000 yuan. I was speechless. This thief even steals from her own family Seeing that I didn't respond she continued “If you think it's not enough I can transfer more to you via WeChat but I don't have much only a few thousand on hand. Just let me

go and we'll pretend this never happened. I've never seen you before I'm still young haven't been in a relationship or married. Please I beg you. I was stunned completely bewildered. What did she think I was I hurriedly turned on the light. A young woman was pinned against the wall by me with tiny drops of water running down her fair cheeks. They passed over her slightly trembling eyelashes flowed down her autumn-water-clear almond eyes and finally gathered at her quivering chin before falling onto her soft body. Her delicate figure was pressed tightly against the wall showing off

her curvaceous silhouette. Her eyes were full of fear and helplessness. When I took a closer look I froze. This woman looked exactly like the photo my mother had shown me of the young tenant next door I hesitantly asked Ana She nodded in confusion. Afterward once she had dressed she explained “I'm the tenant next door. The water heater there broke down and the landlady asked me to come here to take a shower. Sorry I scared you. I was speechless and embarrassed wishing I could disappear into a hole. I flushed and muttered Sorry I— Ana waved her

hand and said “It's fine I understand. You really scared me though. I thought I was going to… lose… She paused and suddenly covered her arm. I looked at her and saw a small bite mark on her forearm which was turning purple. I awkwardly scratched my head and said “I'm really sorry. Let me go get some iodine to disinfect that for you. Before I returned I never expected my first night back home would involve sitting on my own couch next to a strange woman. We were nearly head to head. I pressed a cotton ball to her

wound and that's when I found out that Ana was an artist and had been visiting the area for inspiration recently. “Looks like it's a bit deep really sorry. I startled you earlier I said frowning as I looked at her wound. Do you need a tetanus shot Ana rubbed her face and seriously said I think I need a rabies shot. It took me a second to realize she was insulting me. I couldn't help but glare at her but my gaze wasn't as forceful since I knew I was in the wrong. Ana chuckled To be fair your

bite mark is actually quite round. It has a certain aesthetic to it. Chapter 10 My mom really liked Ana and often invited her over for dinner. She would secretly give me suggestive looks Ana is such a nice girl. She often comes over to chat with me and keep me company. Just look at her she's so beautiful If you two got married and had kids they'd definitely be—” I helplessly said Mom that's enough. It's not that I didn't think Ana was great But I once saw her wearing a trench coat. That trench coat carelessly tossed over

the back of my couch I'd seen Willow wear before. It was a custom-made piece by an Italian family with a century-old history worth at least six figures. She was also from a rich family not someone from my world. Yet Ana had a way of charming older folks. She would call them "sir" and "madam " and since she came the garden had become even more vibrant. She enjoyed tending to the flowers in her spare time filling the yard with the scent of fresh blooms. Even my dad spoke highly of her. Even on New Year's Eve my

mom invited her over to join us for the family dinner. I was speechless Why did you invite her over My mom shot me a glance and replied “Ana's all alone here so pitiful. Do you have the heart to let her spend New Year's by herself without even having dumplings I had no choice but to watch as Ana sat down at the dinner table her peach blossom eyes sparkling as she smiled Madam the dumplings you made are delicious. My mom's face practically reached the back of her head as she eagerly handed her more dumplings If you

like them eat more She went on and on and I couldn't help but feel awkward when she sighed and looked at me George when are you going to bring a wife home for me With others around I felt embarrassed Mom there are people here. Can we just eat in peace Ana turned to me and said George looks like such a warm-hearted guy and he's really handsome. I'm sure some young lady will like him don't worry madam. My mom pouted What am I supposed to be worried about He was so cute when he was little and

now he's getting more and more like his father. I'll show you his baby pictures in a minute. I couldn't take it anymore: “Mom enough already But Ana just smiled and said Sure. After dinner my mom really pulled out the photo album and sat with Ana to look through it. This was when he was 100 days old so chubby and cute. Look at George as a child so fair with big eyes. The neighbors all loved him. They said he looked like a little lucky doll. This is from his elementary school performance—oh my gosh look at his

chubby cheeks so adorable. My mom hadn't even finished flipping through when my dad called her away. I awkwardly walked over and said My mom is like this. Don't mind her if you don't want to see you don't have to—” But Ana looked up with a smile in her clear eyes and said “Don't mind it. The madam is right you were really cute as a kid. I froze on the spot. Chapter 11 After watching the New Year's Gala the sounds of firecrackers outside hadn't died down. The small town doesn't ban fireworks and various colorful fireworks flew

all around. Although they were clearly cheap they were still dazzling when they bloomed in the sky. I stood on the balcony with a bottle of beer unable to stop myself from thinking about what my friend had said. He told me that Willow was going to White Horse Manor for a vacation with Makoto his tone full of frustration “You've been unclear with her for so long and you still haven't won her over. She's already planning her wedding in a few days I could only smile helplessly. She was probably sweet and lovey-dovey with Makoto now and from

now on she wouldn't need me to spend New Year's with her. It seemed like her life no longer needed my presence. When my friend found out about the mess between me and Willow he scolded me for being useless. I knew he was right it was pretty pathetic. She had never once said she liked me but I kept clinging to her pretending we had something. I loved her too much. I couldn't bear the thought of losing her even if this fake intimacy was the only way I could feel like I had her. But those false joys

were fleeting just like the fireworks in the sky—gone in a moment. Are you bothered My thoughts were interrupted as I turned around and saw Ana with a lollipop in her mouth tilting her head slightly. After I shook my head she came closer and the lollipop twirled in her mouth. I tried to make conversation “Aren't you going to mind being alone for New Year's Where are your parents Ana chewing on the lollipop mumbled “They're far away. I wanted to smack myself. Sorry Ana glanced at me her eyes gleaming with a smile. “They're on a cruise to

Antarctica. I shut my mouth feeling like an idiot. Ana couldn't hold it in anymore and started laughing accidentally cracking the candy in her mouth. She coughed a few times before grabbing the beer next to me and taking a swig. I dryly said Uh I already had some. She handed me an unopened bottle and naturally took the one I had been drinking. So what's fun to do here in the winter I was sidetracked by her question. I thought for a moment and said “There's not much to do here it's too cold in winter. Hmm you could

watch a movie. Ana nodded slightly indicating she understood. I broke the silence curious Why did you come here Fieldwork Ana squinted at the distant horizon. “Don't you think the winter here is especially beautiful Yeah it is. So when are you leaving Ana didn't immediately answer. After a pause she smiled with a glint in her eyes and said I was thinking of leaving in spring but now I suddenly want to stay a little longer. Why “Because—” Just then my phone rang and it was an unfamiliar number. I motioned to Ana and she wisely stepped back from

the balcony. Hello There was a long silence on the other end before Willow's voice finally came through George did you change your phone number Chapter 12 I wanted to cut off all contact with Willow so I only told two close friends about changing my phone number. I also stopped using my old WeChat account planning to delete it once I finished sorting out my personal relationships. But it was too easy for Willow to find me. I thought our separation was mutual and understood but I didn't expect her to still reach out. I vaguely responded “Mm.” There

was a brief pause on the other end and then Willow's voice came through low and controlled When are you coming back I'll go find you.” In the distance fireworks exploded their fleeting brilliance leaving only ashes in the air a second later. I took a deep breath feeling my throat tighten. Willow I said quietly “I'm not coming back. There was a long silence on the other end and after a few seconds Willow's voice was emotionless “You're not coming back What do you mean I opened a beer can and the foam spilled over. “I'm not going back

to South City. I gripped the can feeling the coldness seep through my hand into my body the dull pain in my chest tightening numbed by the alcohol. “I'm staying in my hometown. Willow you're right. I'm not getting any younger it's time to settle down with someone. All that remained on the line was the sound of breathing. I stayed silent for a while. “I'll hang up now.” “If you don't have anything else to say… then don't look for me again. I was about to hang up when Willow suddenly raised her voice George what do you mean

Say it clearly Ana pushed open the balcony door just then. Beer do you want some more Willow froze then demanded George who are you with I didn't want to talk to her anymore so I hung up the phone and blocked the number. Sorry did I interrupt you Ana came over and asked. I shook my head. “No.” Girlfriend She suddenly sounded like she was gossiping. No. I took a sip of beer the cold liquid sliding down my throat leaving my neck feeling cool and empty and I couldn't help but shiver. A red scarf warm from someone's

body was suddenly draped around my neck. I turned my head. Ana blushed and said “Don't freeze. That night I lost track of time drinking with Ana. My parents didn't bother us and we sat on the balcony drinking and chatting. When I woke up I found myself lying in my bedroom. I sleepily walked downstairs and was surprised to find Ana already dressed sitting at the dining table with my mom peeling garlic and chatting. I couldn't help but click my tongue. Some people could look like a model even while peeling garlic. No wonder she was an artist—looking

at her face every day how could her sense of aesthetics not be high My mom frowned and scolded me “It's already so late and you're still sleeping It's New Year's Day and Ana has already come to wish us a Happy New Year I glared at Ana. We drank together last night and now she's trying to get me in trouble My mom noticed the bite mark on Ana's arm and exclaimed Oh my what bit you This big bruise is that a dog bite I stopped in my tracks and Ana smiled faintly. Oh just a little curly-haired

dog. Never mind the dog did you get a vaccine Mm I did ma'am.” I gritted my teeth. My mom continued rambling You young people staying at home all day is so boring. Go out and see the sights. Even though our town is small there are lots of beautiful places. Ana lowered her long lashes a touch of melancholy in her eyes. “Ma'am I don't have any friends here and I'm not sure where to go for fun.” My mom felt sorry for her and pointed at me This wild kid is always lazing around at home let him

go out and accompany you Ana smiled contentedly. Ah thank you ma'am.” I rolled my eyes. Ana looked like a high-and-mighty flower but turns out she's just a pretentious coquette girl after all. Chapter 13 The next morning I quickly packed up planning to have breakfast and then take Ana out for a walk. My mom was still busy in the kitchen when there was a knock at the door. It was probably Ana coming over to mooch some food again. I walked over to open the door muttering "Back again to mooch off us—" My words caught in my

throat and I stared wide-eyed. Standing at the door was Willow. She was wearing a black down jacket with snowflakes settled on her shoulders and when she blinked the melting snowwater dampened her lashes. "You—" I stuttered "What are you doing here " "I'm here to wish the Mr. and Mrs. a Happy New Year and pick up my red envelope " she replied smoothly. My mom came out of the kitchen holding a spatula and cheerfully said "Ana's here Mrs. made your favorite braised pork buns—" She froze when she saw Willow. Willow nodded at my mom "Happy New

Year Mrs. I'm Willow George's friend." With that she set down a pile of bags in the living room and politely added "I hope you don't mind me dropping by." My mom nervously put the spatula down. "Ah—no not at all um..." She struggled for something to say. "Willow have you eaten yet If not please join us." I thought Willow would refuse. After all when was someone like her—so high-class—ever going to eat in my family's humble home But Willow nodded and said sweetly "No I haven't. Thank you Mrs." I watched her quietly wondering if she'd lost her

mind. My parents were polite but distant towards Willow's visit. They weren't stupid they knew who was behind my setbacks in the past few years. Honestly it wasn't Willow's fault for not liking me. But to my parents their son was perfect in every way so if someone didn't like him they were just blind. They remained cool and aloof around Willow. A while later the doorbell rang again. My mom opened the door and Ana came in holding a watermelon. "Mrs. I saw some watermelons being sold and thought I'd buy one." My mom's face instantly changed and she

smiled "Oh my you didn't have to bring anything. It's winter watermelons are so expensive You're wasting money." "It's not expensive. Mrs. I smell braised pork buns—did you make them this morning " "Yes " my mom quickly handed Ana a pair of slippers "The ones you like Today eat as much as you want " Yes Ana had practically made herself at home even had her own slippers in our house. At this rate if I stayed away for another six months my parents would probably treat her like their own daughter. The dining room quickly became lively with

Ana chatting away with my mom about this and that while Willow stayed silent and didn't eat much. I honestly didn't get it. Ana a painter was supposed to be all aloof and distant. But here she was chatting away with a middle-aged woman about all kinds of gossip from the story of Mrs. Li's daughter marrying a gangster and getting pregnant before marriage—almost killing Mrs. Li in the process—to Mr. Wang from the east side getting involved with his maid trying to kick out his wife for a divorce. What in the world was all that Until Ana asked

me "George where are we going today " Suddenly Willow set down her chopsticks and looked at Ana coldly "Who are you " Her tone was rude. Ana wasn't bothered though. She just smiled and said "Oh I live here." Willow's face darkened instantly. The rest of the meal felt like I was sitting on pins and needles. After we ate I immediately called Willow upstairs. "What are you really here for " I frowned. "Aren't you supposed to be with Makoto on vacation " Willow turned her head. "I suddenly didn't feel like going." She got a little angry

and asked "George why did you suddenly come back to your hometown " "Did things not go well in South City We're friends if you need help I can assist you." She paused as if there was so much she wanted to say but all that came out was "As long as you're willing to come back right You must be short on cash. Why didn't you say anything That little bit of male pride won't feed you." I stared at Willow's face. Her arrogance was so blatant it should have seemed harsh. But with her beauty even the harshness

took on an air of icy elegance. Years had passed and she hadn't really changed. I let out a bitter smile "Willow what do you want me to go back for " She froze. I continued "There's nothing left in South City to tie me down." But Willow said "What about me You're just going to leave me behind After all these years together—" Her brows furrowed her eyes filled with complicated emotions. I cut her off "But don't you have Makoto with you " "Willow " I said lifting my head to look her in the eyes "I can't

stay with you forever. I have my own life." "I'm not young anymore. It's time for me to settle down find someone and live a steady life. Didn't you say that yourself " Willow stared at me blankly. Ana called me from outside "George are you ready The car's here." As I stepped out Willow suddenly grabbed my arm pulling me with force. "Who is she " Her face was dark with anger. "My houseguest." "Houseguest " Willow sneered coldly "I bet your parents are already planning to take her in as their daughter-in-law huh " "George you came back

for her didn't you " I was getting impatient. "Think whatever you want I'm leaving." Then the next moment Willow snapped shouting wildly "What have you slept with her Is it better than sleeping with me " Slap I slapped her hard across the face. Willow turned her head her cheek stinging. The slap had been full force. Blood slowly began to seep from the corner of her mouth. She wiped it away and a tear slipped down her face mingling with the faint smile on her lips. She said "George you're something else now hitting a woman " She

grabbed my right hand and pressed it against the other side of her face saying "Is that better Do you feel better now You can hit this side too if you want." I looked at her my heart a mess. I laughed bitterly and said "Willow what do you want from me Are you insulting yourself or are you insulting the me who stayed by your side like that " Willow suddenly snapped out of it hurriedly wiping away her tears. "George please don't say that." "I was wrong I shouldn't have said that." At that moment all the pent-up

emotions burst through and I felt like I couldn't stand anymore. It was like I was experiencing low blood sugar—everything seemed upside down and the world lost its color. I shook and collapsed onto the couch. My fingers trembled. Willow panicked and tried to comfort me "I'm sorry George don't be mad I was wrong I said things I shouldn't have." "Hit me again hit me twice " she said dragging my hand and rubbing it against her face her face streaked with tears. She sobbed "Hit me hit me please." I was shaking with anger pointing to the door

and shouting "Get out " "Willow you disgust me get out " This was the first time I laid a hand on Willow and the first time I cursed her. Willow stood frozen confusion in her eyes. Just then her phone rang and she answered. Makoto's voice came through "Willow where are you " "I just got food poisoning I'm in the hospital. When are you coming back " Willow didn't respond hanging up the phone. After a long pause she softly said "George if you ask me to stay I won't leave." I looked at her gave a faint

smile and calmly said "Go ahead Willow." "Don't come back to find me." Willow gave me one last look her eyes dark with emotion. "Fine " she said. "George don't regret it." The last tear fell from her cheek and splashed onto the floor. Then she slammed the door and left. Chapter 14 I didn't understand why Willow had acted like that. After thinking it over I figured it was probably because I had always been by her side and suddenly I was gone—she wasn't used to it. Maybe in her eyes even if she didn't like me I was

supposed to always be there treating her like the center of the universe. But with Willow's prideful nature after I had spoken to her like that she would definitely never come back. My eyes felt sore and my heart was heavy with complicated feelings—yet it also felt empty like there was nothing left. That day I couldn't go out with Ana. When I went to explain my eyes red Ana didn't say anything. She just reached out and linked her hand with mine. Then that night she came over again My parents had gone out to visit relatives. When I

opened the door Ana was standing there with a pair of Ultraman underwear dangling from her delicate finger. What the hell that's mine My face flushed bright red and I grabbed it lowering my voice to hiss "Where did you get this " Ana looked at me with wide innocent eyes. "It blew over from your balcony. I was in the yard enjoying the breeze and it just fell right on top of my head." I felt like my head was about to explode. I stammered unsure of what to say. Ana just kept laughing. She was staring at the

underwear I was holding and that smile—ugh it was so annoying I almost wanted to thank her but couldn't bring myself to. "What are you laughing at " I glared at her "Ultraman is a symbol of a mature man " Ana smiled sweetly "Mmhmm. When I have a kid I'll name him Diga." I was speechless. She could even make a connection like that "Rest well tonight. If you're feeling low blood sugar just eat one of these " Ana handed me a jar. "I'll come find you tomorrow to hang out." She closed the door behind her. I

looked down and saw it was a box of chocolates. On this cold winter evening that warmth spread up through my palms. I reached up and touched my chest. It felt like—something was swelling there. Chapter 15 Ana and I never did get to watch the movie. It was a 6 PM showing but because of the heavy snow we couldn't get a cab and I hadn't driven my car. She insisted on waiting for the last bus. So I checked and around six o'clock was when the last bus came so I took her there. But when we arrived

the bus had just left and we chased it through the snow for a while but couldn't catch it. Ana was furious. She said "An 80-dollar movie ticket just like that wasted." "There's nothing we can do. Since you've already done your makeup let's just go for a walk by the sea." The winter sea was beautiful as if the entire world had been coated in a cold bluish tint. The streets were blanketed in white and the blue signs stuck out of the snow. Occasionally there were couples wrapped up tightly laughing and talking close together. On the narrow

streets the headlights of cars turned the falling snowflakes into a warm yellow hue. Ana and I walked along the beach chatting here and there. I had done some research over the past few days and found out that Ana was actually a very famous and talented artist in the industry. So I asked her politely "What have you been painting lately I've never seen you paint." Ana glanced at me and stuck out her tongue saying "I'm not telling you." I was speechless. Fine if she didn't want to tell me she didn't have to. She was being quite

mysterious though acting like she was hiding some secret. The cold damp sea breeze pierced through the gaps in my clothes. Ana walked for a bit rubbing her hands together and exhaled a puff of air. I said "I told you to wear more layers. You were too busy looking pretty and now you're cold huh " I don't usually speak like this. My friends always say I have a good temper but for some reason when I'm with Ana I can't help but tease her. She shot me a glance and retorted "A real man would take off his

coat and give it to a woman. Are you even a man " I teased back "But I'm only wearing one jacket. If I give it to you I'll freeze " Ana fuming walked ahead muttering "You dog of a man I can warm myself up with exercise " But I grabbed her arm. "I can't give you my coat but I can share half of it with you." With that I unzipped my jacket pulled her into my arms and wrapped it around both of us. The faint scent of lavender lingered near my nose as she pressed her

face into my chest. I could feel her heartbeat and she could feel mine. It was like a drumbeat. I couldn't tell if it was mine or hers. She felt warm and soft and both our chills were swept away. We stood there quietly wrapped in each other's warmth neither of us speaking first. At some point the snow stopped falling. The clouds in the night sky parted revealing a few scattered stars. One star was especially bright. Ana looked up for a moment and asked "George have you ever read The Nightingale and the Rose " My mind went

blank. "What " "There's a nightingale in it. She hears a young student crying because he can't find a red rose so she gives her life to create one." I nodded and asked "Okay so what happened next Why did the student need that red rose " The waves along the shore had already frozen a smooth white surface stretching across the beach with more snow accumulating on top of the waves. "George " Ana suddenly called my name. I looked down and Ana was gazing at me intently. There was a soft glowing light in her eyes a gentle

tenderness. Slowly she rose onto her tiptoes. A cool kiss landed on my lips. Chapter 16 Sitting on the plane back to Nan City I couldn't help but smile bitterly at the window. I had just said I wasn't coming back and here I was again. But a friend's wedding is one of those big life events and I couldn't miss it no matter what. Ana insisted on coming with me but after that kiss my mind was in turmoil so I refused her. She didn't seem too happy about it. When I left she stared at me at the

airport. "George if you don't come back I'll come find you in Nan City." I nodded and said "Alright alright I'll come back tomorrow " I had just put the red envelope into the box and sat down in the banquet hall when I felt a gaze on me. Willow naturally sat in the chair next to me. Makoto seeing me furrowed his brows slightly but still smiled and said "George I heard you came back to your hometown. How come you're back so soon " "I came for the wedding and then I'll go back." Makoto let out a

sigh of relief his smile widening a little "I see. It's a pity but when Willow and I get married you have to come to that one too " I couldn't be bothered to argue with him. I simply replied "Yeah if I have time." Throughout dinner Willow seemed to be showing off her affection. She'd feed Makoto some food or she'd hold onto him and make him drink. The two of them were glued together all lovey-dovey and clingy. If this had happened before I would have definitely felt uncomfortable. But at that moment my mind was filled with

that kiss from Ana. What did it mean Did she like me What should I do Do I like her Meanwhile Willow and Makoto's public display of affection grew more intense. Willow who had been smiling earlier suddenly changed her expression when Makoto put a piece of beef on her plate. She stiffly said "Makoto I'm allergic to beef. You forgot " Makoto froze for a moment about to speak when suddenly the noise from the table next to us grew louder. It was the family table. The groom's family was upset because the bride had bought a house before

the wedding and drunk the groom's side shouted "Your family's just been scheming against us " The bride's relatives were equally angry "We agreed to pool in for the down payment but you secretly bought the house and now expect us to pay for the renovations What's the logic behind that " The groom's uncle drunk started pointing at them and cursing "So what if it's for renovations Does your daughter feel too shy to move in Are you selling your daughter off " The bride's family stood up "What do you mean by selling off You guys changed the

terms without telling us. Everyone knows property values rise and renovations only reduce the value. Do you think you're the only ones who are smart You think everyone else is an idiot " The two sides exchanged heated words neither giving way. No matter how the bride and groom tried to mediate the shouting wouldn't stop. Eventually someone must have thrown the first punch and chaos broke out with dishes and bowls flying around In the confusion several bottles of liquor came crashing toward our table Willow instinctively pushed me away. One bottle hit Makoto's head with a sharp crack

and blood began to seep from his forehead. Willow didn't notice at first. She leaned over to me and asked in a panic "George are you alright " Makoto stood still his hair stained with blood staring blankly at Willow who was worriedly looking at me. Only then did Willow notice the blood on his forehead. She opened her mouth as if to speak but fell silent. Makoto clenched his fists gritting his teeth but said nothing. I had a bad feeling. I quickly got up to leave. I understood Makoto's hostility toward me but I had already given up

on Willow. I really didn't want to get involved in their business anymore. "I'll head out first " I said quickly. "Thanks for earlier." "Wait " Willow instinctively started to chase after me. Makoto shouted from behind "Willow if you go after him we're done " Willow's footsteps slowly came to a halt. After a moment she turned to look at Makoto and there was no sadness on her face only a slight sense of relief and release. "Okay " she said. Makoto's eyes widened. After a long pause he stared at Willow a bitter smile tugging at his lips.

"Willow " he said his voice filled with anguish and hatred "What are you even " Then without a second glance he turned and left in disgrace. Chapter 17 Walking out of the hotel I lowered my head and asked "Why " Willow didn't answer. After a long silence she suddenly stopped and gave a self-mocking laugh. "Because I like you alright " "George I understand now I finally understand. It's me. I'm pathetic." She closed her eyes for a moment her slender figure seeming to collapse as if the stone weighing down on her had finally been moved. "If

we're together I know you like me. From now on whatever you want from me I'll give it to you. I won't be with anyone else." "Come back George." I stared at her for a while unable to stop myself from thinking if she had said this months ago how happy I would have been. I had liked her for so many years. In the past ten years I had been exhausted in pain and troubled. But I had never once given up on my love for her. I finally got what I had dreamed of Willow had returned my

feelings. Yet I only felt ridiculous. An indescribable fatigue washed over me. I shook my head "No." Willow grabbed my shoulder with force her brows furrowing a flash of excitement passing through her eyes. "Why " "George can you honestly say you don't like me " I looked up into her eyes. This woman I had loved for ten years who had grown from a girl into a woman her appearance seemingly unchanged but I felt as if the world had shifted as if everything had changed. For the first time I clearly understood—we couldn't go back to the way

things were. "No one will wait for you forever " I said calmly. "Willow loving you has been too difficult too difficult. I'm exhausted. I don't want to love you anymore." Raindrops began to fall. The rain gradually became heavier the traffic flowing endlessly through the rain curtain the neon lights flickering in bizarre colors flowing like a dream. Willow's gaze remained fixed on me the raindrops falling into her eyes and the spark that had once been there slowly faded. Her lips parted slowly her voice trembling as she spoke "George don't do this." "Give me another chance. I'm

begging you." Willow was too proud of a person and after all these years by her side I had never seen her so humble. She said "I'm begging you." But who should I beg for the one who had loved him so painfully for so many years I suddenly understood that love doesn't fade gradually. Instead it disappears in an instant. The fire that once almost consumed me after being extinguished at some point could never be reignited. I gently pulled Willow's hand away and whispered "It's too late." Willow's eyelashes and the corners of her eyes were dotted with

raindrops. Her clothes were soaked through and the strands of hair on her forehead stuck to her face. The rain felt as if it weighed a thousand pounds layer by layer breaking her pride completely. She blinked. A droplet hit the ground with a soft plop. I couldn't tell if it was rain or tears. Chapter 18 After six months back in my hometown my relationship with Ana hadn't progressed much. We still got along very well but every time the topic of defining our relationship came up I always felt like I wasn't ready yet. My last relationship had

been too painful. I started to worry a little. One day I went to see Ana but I found her packing her things. A suitcase stood by the side and she was folding clothes. I stood there stunned. "Are you leaving " "Mm. " Ana didn't look up. "Why the rush What time is your flight " "2 p. m. I'm leaving soon." I stood there a little stiff and said "Oh I see." The room fell silent. I awkwardly tried to make conversation. "Well I suppose this place is nice to look at when it's snowing but in the

summer there's nothing special about it." Ana looked up and shot me a glance of complaint. "Is that all you have to say " I said "Uh… Safe travels." "And " "…That's it." Ana lowered her head and continued packing her things visibly upset. I bent over and tried to look up at her from below "Are you crying " Ana rolled her eyes turning her head to the side. So I tried again looking up at her from the other side "Are you really crying " Ana snapped "Are you sick or something I'm leaving and you don't have

anything else to say " I nodded and said "Then don't leave. Stay and keep me company." She snorted "Why would I stay with you I'm not some love-struck idiot." I was speechless feeling a little disappointed as I watched her continue packing. She leaned in from the left side and looked at me "Are you crying " I didn't answer turning my head away. Then she leaned in from the other side and asked again "Are you really crying " I didn't respond. This little girl sure had a strong sense of revenge. A moment later Ana said "I

know you'll miss me. I'll be back the day after tomorrow. Don't forget to pick me up at the airport." I was surprised. "Huh You're coming back " "Obviously " she gave me a look. "I paid for a year's worth of rent." I scoffed and said "I'll get it back for you then." "Huh Why " "Don't you want to live there anymore " I tapped her nose and said "My mom would never have the nerve to charge her future daughter-in-law rent." Ana's face turned red and she reached out to hit me. She said "Who's your future

daughter-in-law " I grabbed her wrist and pulled her into my arms. Gently I lifted her face. In the soft kiss that followed she said "Wait for me to come back." Chapter 19 I didn't hear from Willow again until six months later through a message from a friend. "Do you know Willow's suffering from severe depression A few days ago she mixed alcohol with sleeping pills. Luckily they found her in time took her to the hospital and saved her by pumping her stomach." She cautiously added "I heard when she was brought to the hospital she wasn't unconscious

yet and she kept calling your name." I fell silent. "Do you want to go see her " I rejected the suggestion. Our paths had long diverged whether for better or worse I didn't want to have any more connections with her. But I didn't expect Willow to come find me. The northern snow came early that year. It was only December but the sky was already blanketed with a thick swirling snowstorm. The small town wasn't too noisy and the snow fell quietly. Ana and I had just finished shopping at the supermarket and were heading home when we

spotted a figure standing under a streetlamp not far away. The figure was already covered in a thick layer of snow. It was Willow standing still watching us quietly with emptiness in her eyes. "George." Her voice fell into the snow trembling slightly. I nudged Ana. "You go ahead I'll catch up in a bit." Ana furrowed her brows then reluctantly said "I'll give you five minutes." "Just five minutes okay " After Ana left Willow walked up to me. We hadn't seen each other in almost a year. She looked thinner and the once arrogant look in her eyes

had dimmed. "Is there something you need " I asked her. She just stared at me her eyes slowly reddening. Her voice was hoarse as she said "George I can't let go. What should I do " "How did you let go " She asked. "Teach me please." I replied calmly "Once you've hurt enough you just let go." Willow looked slightly dazed and she hunched down as if my words had pierced her like a knife. "We just missed each other. " Her eyes reddened "If I had understood sooner maybe we could've—" "No " I shook my head

with a bitter smile "Willow it was never about missing each other." "As long as I didn't leave you'd never think of me." "We were never meant to be. There was no future." Willow's lips moved as if she wanted to say something but the words never came. Tears or perhaps melted snow dripped from her eyes. When I noticed fresh scars on her wrist I sighed "Willow I used to think that loving someone so much and not being able to have them meant the world was going to end." "But now I realize in this world everyone can

keep going no matter who's missing." "You'll let go eventually." I glanced at my watch my five minutes were almost up. Ana that little jealous troublemaker would surely be upset if I was late. I turned to wave at Willow "Alright time's up. Let's go Willow." Just as I was walking away I heard a heart-wrenching cry from behind "George I can't let go " "I'll never be able to let go " I kept walking not looking back. Later as I was taking off my shoes Ana leaned against the wall glaring at me with that strange look in

her eyes. She mimicked Willow's tone saying "Oh~ George~ I can't let go~" I acted nonchalant and said "Mom wants us to come over for dumplings. You going " She immediately forgot about the scene and brightened up. "Yeah let's go " Chapter 20 The news that the genius painter Ana was holding an art exhibition quickly trended online. My friend was beyond excited and called me immediately "Please please you know Ana right Help me get a ticket I love her work " I went to see Ana but she only gave me one ticket "I don't have any

more just this one for you." I was speechless. She really is too proud I gritted my teeth but when the day of the exhibition arrived my body honestly showed up. I really wanted to see what Ana had painted in this small town. The exhibition was called The Nightingale's Rose. What was strange though was that there was no one at the entrance. The exhibition hall was dark and I started to feel a little doubtful. Could I have gotten the time wrong But then in the next moment all the lights turned on at once I stood frozen

in place. The hall was filled with paintings big and small scattered all around – all of them were portraits of me. There I was drinking beer on the balcony wearing a coat walking on the beach laughing foolishly with my head down. I had never known that Ana had painted so many portraits of me. I didn't know how she remembered all these moments. Each scene was vivid with lifelike expressions and her gentle brushstrokes overflowed with love. Every moment we spent together had been captured by her paintbrush. I walked down the hallway to the last painting. It

was an oil painting in the tranquil dawn a nightingale handing a rose to a young boy emitting a soft glow. My eyes welled up with tears as I stared at the painting then at the person who walked out from behind it. Ana holding a single rose smiled as she walked toward me. She said "Would you cherish this nightingale's rose " I nodded took a few quick steps forward and pulled her into an embrace. "Yes I will never let it go." Side Story - Willow's Perspective A friend asked me what I liked about Makoto and I

was about to say his strengths. But suddenly the image of another person flashed in my mind. I waved it away. George is just a friend. He can only be a friend. I never thought George would leave. He had been with me for twelve years. How many people get twelve years like that in their lives Almost half of his life had been spent with me. We couldn't live without each other. But I never imagined he would actually leave. He said he was going back to his hometown and wouldn't return. I thought it was absurd. He's not

coming back Then what am I supposed to do After hanging up the phone I went out onto the balcony and started drinking. If he wants to leave let him. He's just a friend. I have plenty of friends. But no matter what I couldn't stop panicking. I fumbled with my lighter for a long time unable to get it to work. I realized I couldn't take it. I had to go find him. I had to ask him why he wasn't coming back. Where could he possibly go when I was still here But the moment I saw him

I realized he was serious. He had made his decision. I panicked. When I saw another woman appear by his side I was consumed with anger. I'd never been so angry in my life. I spoke without thinking and she slapped me. He told me to leave. So I left. Back home I dug out that Snoopy pajamas from my closet. It was a mistake I had made when buying pajamas. At the time I thought it would make a good gift for him—it seemed to suit him. But since I bought too many I wore it a few times

myself. Every time he saw me wearing it he was so happy laughing behind my back and even taking pictures. Before he left he told me to throw it away but for some reason I didn't. I just kept it in my closet. I took it out now and stared at it in a daze. It hit me almost too late that I had liked George for a long time. I was the one who had relied on him more. But subconsciously I thought I shouldn't like him. I remember what my mom told me before she died “Don't love

someone too much because love will kill you. Love killed her. Her whole life was spent on one man and in the end she gave up her life too. I understood. Love fades. Love isn't reliable. No matter how deeply two people love each other in the end they'll either grow tired of each other or even become enemies. Lovers will leave. If I were with George maybe he'd get bored and fall in love with someone else. But friends don't leave. Friends can be with you for a lifetime. I knew George liked me. But I pretended not to

know deceiving myself with this "friend" label. But only now did I realize that he too would get tired and hurt. He would leave. I tried to get him back. I told him I'd understood I begged him lowering my pride. George loves me so much how could he bear to let me suffer But he just smiled at me calmly. "It's too late " he said. I knew it. I had no chance left. The love in George's eyes was gone. But it didn't matter right If he could let go then I could too. For a year I

didn't go looking for him. I didn't check any news about him. I pretended he wasn't in my world anymore. I ate alone. I slept alone. I lived alone. I didn't think about him anymore. I thought I was okay. I thought I had moved on. Until one day I suddenly started having insomnia. I couldn't sleep anymore. I began taking sleeping pills and later I started to hoard them. After collecting a whole bottle I took them with alcohol and swallowed them down. I didn't even feel pain. I just felt like it wasn't worth it anymore. While I

was unconscious I dreamed of George. Since he left I had never dreamed of him again—this was the first time. In the dream it was snowing. It was cold so cold. He was 17 again draping a black down jacket over my shoulders and chiding me "Willow how come you're so grown up but still don't take care of yourself properly " Tears welled up in my eyes and I tightly gripped his hand. But George slowly pulled his hand away and he began to grow older turning into an adult. The smile on his face seemed weary and he

said to me "Willow I have to go." "You'll have to take care of yourself from now on." Tears streamed down my face and I begged him not to go. But he slowly pulled his hand from mine and turned to leave. A suffocating pain shot through my chest. It felt like he took my heart with him when he left. I finally understood. I had never let go. I will never be able to let go.