Stop Trying to Be a Good Person - Lessons From Machiavelli

[Music] You are tired. Maybe you don't even know exactly why, but you feel it. You feel like you are always carrying an invisible weight.

As if it were your obligation to keep everything in balance. Please, everyone, avoid conflicts. Always be kind, understanding, polite.

You learned early on that being a good person was the right thing to do. That the good win in the end. That if you are kind, others will reciprocate.

That it's enough to be fair, honest, humble, and the world will recognize that. But what if I told you that all of this is a lie? A comfortable lie taught to keep you well behaved, predictable, controllable.

How many times have you stayed silent to keep the peace? How many times have you erased yourself just to avoid disappointing anyone? How many times have you let someone disrespect you, take advantage of you, and still you smiled, said, "It's all good.

" Swallowed your tears, anger, pride in the name of a supposed virtue that only made you be ignored. Listen carefully. The world does not reward the nice guys.

The world rewards the strategic ones. If you are here, it's because you have already felt this in your skin. You have been frustrated trying to be the nice guy, the good person, the understanding friend.

And now you are starting to realize that the more you try to be accepted, the less you are respected. The more you give in, the more they demand. The more you give, the less you are valued.

And that's where Machaveli comes in. Machaveli was not the devil that many say. He was perhaps the first to tell the naked truth about how power works.

He understood something that most people refuse to accept. That pure morality detached from reality is a trap. that being seen as good is not the same as being effective, fair or worthy.

In this video, we are going to talk without filters, without masks, about why you need to stop trying to be a good person. And no, that doesn't mean becoming someone cruel or cold. It means waking up.

Awakening from the childish dream that the world is fair and that it's enough to be virtuous to be rewarded. We will expose the truth no matter how uncomfortable it may be. As long as you are trying to please everyone, you will be in their hands, a hostage of your own kindness.

And if you are already tired of being used, ignored, discarded, maybe it's time to change, to learn from Machaveli what they never taught you and finally take control of your life. Ready? Then let's get started.

Do you still believe that the world values good people? Look around you. Who are the most admired?

Who holds leadership positions? Who earns respect, influence, space? Are they the most generous, the most compassionate, the most just, or are they the most strategic, the most assertive, the hardest to manipulate?

The truth is brutal. The world is not governed by kindness, but by utility. Machaveli understood this centuries ago.

He didn't write the prince to teach how to be malicious. He wrote to show how the game's played. And one of the bitterest lessons he gives us is this.

Being good is not enough. In many cases, being good is the quickest way to be discarded. You can spend your life being loyal, kind, and understanding.

You can give your best, help others without expecting anything in return. But the day you are no longer useful, you will be forgotten, replaced, silenced, and the worst part, without a shred of guilt from the other side. Because the world does not measure your worth by your morality.

It measures by what you deliver, by the influence you have, by the impact you make. Have you noticed that the nice guys are always chasing after, always justifying, explaining themselves, trying to prove they are deserving? Meanwhile, those who set boundaries, who say no, who present themselves clearly, they are respected.

They have a voice. They have space. And why?

Because blind kindness is seen as weakness. Because those who never confront never threaten and those who do not threaten are not taken seriously. They are seen as a resource, not as a presence, as a tool, not as an individual.

You can kill yourself trying to please, but if you do not represent power or consequence, no one will hesitate to use you. It's harsh, I know, but it's the reality. Machaveli said that a leader should not seek to be loved but to be feared if forced to choose between the two.

And what did he mean by that? That true respect arises from the perception that you are someone with the power to act. That you cannot be trampled without reaction.

That you're not a replaceable piece in someone else's game. And this applies to you too. If you continue living to be pleasant, you will continue to be seen as someone easy to discard.

Not because you are a bad person, but because the world does not reward those who fade away. It's time to understand where this unhealthy desire to be accepted all the time comes from. Because behind your kindness, there is something deeper.

Something that may have been sabotaging you for years. And that is exactly what we will explore. Now, in the next part, we will dive into the psychological roots of those who live trying to please and discover why often being nice is just a disguised form of fear.

If this content is making sense to you, click the subscribe button and subscribe to the channel. Thank you for your support. You weren't born wanting to please everyone.

that was taught to you and worse it was conditioned. Since childhood you learned that being accepted came at a price. Giving up parts of yourself.

Forced smiles, swallowed desires, silenced opinions, all in the name of approval. From don't do that, it's ugly. To be nice to don't respond to you're so polite.

And so little by little, you molded yourself to fit what others expected. But what no one told you is that pleasing all the time is an emotional trap. A psychological prison built with poisoned compliments and punishments disguised as education.

You learned that if you pleased others, you would be loved, and that if you showed anger, set boundaries, or were selfish, you would be rejected. So you did what any mind would do to survive. You adapted.

The problem is that this adaptation turned into submission. Today you no longer know how to say no without feeling guilty. You feel responsible for the well-being of others even if it destroys you inside.

You get frustrated but keep it to yourself. You get disappointed but forgive too quickly. You exhaust yourself trying to maintain an image that others expect.

Not because it is your essence, but because it is what you learned gave you security. But here's a reality check. This is not kindness.

This is fear. Fear of being rejected. Fear of not being loved.

Fear of being seen as a bad person. fear of being who you really are with desires, with anger, with boundaries, with a voice. And this fear has turned you into someone who sabotages themselves, someone who hides behind socially accepted but emotionally destructive behavior.

And the most tragic part, you don't even realize you're doing this. You call it empathy, but it's fear of confrontation. You call it understanding, but it's fear of abandonment.

You call it kindness, but it's fear of not being enough. Your kindness is in fact a mask, an unconscious strategy to avoid the pain of rejection. But this mask has a very high cost.

It suffocates your authenticity, your power, and your dignity. And if you don't take off this mask, it will stick to your skin. It will become your identity.

And one day you will look in the mirror and no longer know who you truly are. But there is a way back. And to find it, we need to learn from someone who understood the power of image, perception, and strategy like no one else.

Machaveli. In the next part, we will get straight to the point. what the prince can teach us about how to stop being a hostage to our need to appear good and start being respected for who we really are.

If you're trying to live as a good person hoping that others will recognize your morality, your ethics, and your integrity, stop now. Machaveli warned over 500 years ago, "This path is beautiful but dangerous. In the real world, it is not the good who win.

It is the effective who win. " And effectiveness in the game of life requires strategy. It requires understanding that people do not act motivated by your goodness.

They act driven by interest, fear, and power. In the prince, Machaveli writes, "Everyone sees what you appear to be, but few feel what you really are. " This sentence is a punch.

It unmasks the illusion that being true, pure, and authentic is enough to earn respect. The reality is harsh. People do not see your intention.

They react to your appearance, your image, your impact. You may be the most just person in the world, but if you seem weak, you will be treated as weak. You may have the most generous heart, but if you do not inspire respect, you will be ignored.

And that is why the prince and here the prince is you. Anyone who wants to take control of their own life cannot be naive. He must appear virtuous when it is convenient and be strategic when it is necessary.

Machaveli says the prince must know how to use the nature of the animal well. He must be a fox to recognize traps and a lion to terrify wolves. This is a brutally true metaphor.

The fox is cunning, sees hidden dangers, knows how to move silently. The lion, on the other hand, imposes fear, strength, presence. Machaveli does not say to be just one or the other.

He says be both. Be wise enough to perceive who is manipulating you and strong enough to make others think twice before trying. Do you want to be respected?

Then understand the virtue that Machaveli recommends is not the one preached by moralists. It is virtue, a mix of courage, intelligence, audacity, and self-control. It is to act with coldness when necessary.

It is to know that sometimes appearing cruel is the only way to maintain order. Not out of malice, but out of wisdom. Here's another quote from him.

A man who wishes to act in all circumstances like a good man is doomed to ruin among so many who are not good. And you know this, you have been that man. You have tried to be good in every situation.

And what did you gain? Abuse, silence, injustice. People do not play fair.

And if you continue to play as if they do, you will always lose. This does not mean abandoning your values. It means stopping using them as shackles.

It means starting to act with power. To think about how your goodness is being perceived and used by others. Machaveli was not cynical.

He was realistic. He saw humanity without romanticism, without veils. And he wrote the prince as a manual for surviving in a world where appearance is power and weakness disguised as virtue is a death sentence.

But perhaps now you are wondering, is there any way to balance this? How can I stop being naive without becoming a cold or evil person? In the next part, we will break the false idea that you only have two choices.

To be nice or to be cruel. There is a middle path and it begins with the strength to stop deceiving yourself. There is a fatal confusion that destroys the lives of many people.

The idea that to be good, one must be submissive. That to be a good person, it is necessary to accept everything in silence, forgive everything without questioning, and live swallowing what bothers you to maintain peace. This is not kindness.

This is naivity. It is cowardice disguised as virtue. And if you do not understand this difference, you will continue to be the emotional doormat of the world.

True kindness does not require you to nullify yourself. It requires awareness, clarity, choice. Being good does not mean being a cheerful fool who is always available, always smiling, always sacrificing for those who wouldn't lift a finger for you.

This is selfabandonment. It is emotional dependency disguised as morality. Naivity believes that people will treat you with the same heart that you have.

Naivity believes that the world is fair and that if you are integral, others will recognize that. Naivity expects gratitude, reciprocity, consideration. And it lives frustrated.

It lives disappointed because it is projecting onto others a nobility that does not exist. True kindness is different. It is firm.

It knows how to say no. It knows how to walk away. It understands that not everyone deserves your best and that giving your best to those who have nothing to offer in return is waste, not generosity.

You can be a just, compassionate and integral person and still be feared. Be respected. be someone who commands presence, who knows what they tolerate and what they do not accept.

Machaveli, despite seeming cruel to modern eyes, did not hate virtue. He hated naivity. He knew that in a world full of predators, kindness without strength is just fresh meat in the middle of the jungle.

The question you need to ask yourself now is, is your kindness protecting you or exposing you? Is it strengthening you or destroying you? Because if your idea of being good involves living by swallowing injustices, accepting crumbs, and blaming yourself for feeling anger, then you are not being good.

You are being dominated. And there is an antidote to this. There is a balance point where you do not have to give up your essence but you also do not have to kneel before anyone.

A place where you can act with courage, clarity and emotional intelligence. In the next part, we will explore this path. We will talk about how to stop being nice without becoming a scoundrel and finally take control of your life without betraying yourself.

If you want to regain your self-respect, this is where the transformation begins. Many people who wake up to their own submission fall into a dangerous mistake. They believe they need to become cold, insensitive, almost cruel to stop being nice.

This is the famous rebound effect. After years of being exploited, you think the only way out is to become the opposite, someone tough, indifferent, calculating. But this is yet another trap.

Because when you abandon your essence, you are not strengthening yourself. You are protecting yourself through denial. And that's not freedom.

It is trauma disguised as power. True liberation happens when you learn to be whole. When you stop acting for others and start acting for yourself.

It's not about being good or bad. It's about being real. About looking in the mirror and knowing that you can be kind, but you will never again be passive.

That you can be compassionate, but you will never again be permissive. That you can extend a hand, but you will no longer beg to be seen. So how do you stop being nice without betraying who you are?

First understand that your voice matters. You have been conditioned to think that complaining, setting boundaries or disagreeing is selfish. But that is a lie.

Selfishness is expecting you to live silently while others speak over you. Speaking up, taking a stand, saying I do not accept this. That is dignity.

It is self-respect. Second, practice saying no. Saying no is one of the most liberating acts there is.

And it doesn't have to be aggressive. It doesn't have to be shouted. A calm, firm, and non-negotiable no has more power than a thousand justifications.

Because it communicates the essential, you have limits, and those who have limits are respected. Those who do not are exploited. Third, observe who is bothered by your change.

These people are the thermometer. If you start to assert yourself and someone says that you are different, you are strange, you are selfish, it's because your submission was useful to them. When you change, you break the invisible pact that allowed them to use you.

And that is uncomfortable. But don't be fooled. This is a sign of progress.

Fourth, stop trying to be understood by everyone. Not everyone will understand your transformation and that's okay. You do not owe loyalty to the image they created of you.

Your loyalty should be to your truth, to your peace, to your emotional health. Fifth, replace the desire to be accepted with a commitment to authenticity. When you act authentically, you may even displease some, but you attract the respect of those who truly matter.

And more than that, you start to respect yourself. And that is the kind of respect that no one can take away. Machaveli did not write to teach you to be cruel.

He wrote to teach you to stop being naive. And the greatest naivity is believing that being nice is enough to be respected in this world. It is not.

It takes courage to abandon the role of pleaser. It takes strength to be who you are without asking for permission. But this journey is not over yet.

Because now comes the decisive moment. The choice between continuing to sabotage yourself or finally taking the reigns of your life. In the last part, we will conclude with a direct brutal and necessary call for you to understand that your obsession with being good may be costing you everything and that the time has come to decide, do you want to be loved or do you want to be free?

It's time to be brutally honest with you. How long are you going to keep pretending to be the nice guy? How long will you sacrifice your energy, your voice, your dignity, just to maintain an image that isn't even yours, but that others expect from you?

Do you think this is virtue? That it's nobility? This is prison, psychological prison, emotional prison, a cell decorated with false compliments where you are applauded for being harmless, for being predictable, for not being a threat.

But I'll tell you something that perhaps no one has had the courage to say before. No one is going to free you from this. No one is going to come, thank you for all the sacrifices, give you the respect you deserve, and say now you can rest.

That's not going to happen because as long as you are willing to be used, there will always be someone willing to use you. This isn't malice. It's reality and reality doesn't bend to good intentions.

You can continue being that ideal of a good person that society has pushed onto you. Calm, patient, understanding, always available, always saying yes. But prepare for a future of frustration, resentment, and invisibility.

Or you can wake up. You can decide here and now that your kindness will no longer be a collar around your neck. That you will act with intention, with presence, with firmness.

That you will choose when to be generous. And to whom? That you will no longer give what you don't receive.

That you will no longer live seeking the approval of others like a dog begging for affection. The truth is simple. The world respects those who respect themselves.

And you will only be free when you stop asking for permission to exist. So I ask you, when was the last time you said no without guilt? When was the last time you put yourself first?

When was the last time you did something for yourself without thinking about how others would react? Tell me in the comments. I want to know the moment you realized that being nice was destroying you.

This conversation needs to continue because there are many people living the same prison and you could be the spark that wakes someone up. And if this video made you rethink your way of living, acting, and seeing yourself, then you need to watch the next one. Trust me, it's important.

The journey is just beginning.