Interviewing Our Dad Sylvester Stallone | Episode 50 | Unwaxed Podcast

no don't encourage this yeah please guys please let me know this this you guys are the problem all right we're going to give him the ego hello everybody and welcome back to a very special episode of the unwax podcast with your favorite sisters sophia and sistine stallone you guys we did it round of applause episode 15. thank you thank you so much oh the studio is clapping yes yes yes it's been a journey it has been i don't think we expected to make it to episode 50. no we did not i feel like we see

ourselves a year ago from today and it was just not the same i think it was us hauling our ring lights in it was embarrassing but we really wanted to make this episode extra special for you guys that's why we thought we must bring in a guest that has never one done a podcast before never is honestly the hardest guess that we've ever had to catch quite literally yeah the sea is pretty big it took a lot of man you guys we went fishing for two weeks to reel this guest in well maybe you had

some holes in your neck did you ever think of that perhaps we did why don't we introduce you right now because clearly you want to jump into the show already we have doing his first podcast interview ever ever the iconic king shark ladies and gentlemen thank you i'd like to be known as the pod father from here on in no father about for you to say do a line from a line also mike in front of your mouth thank you okay now i worked for a long time on that it just doesn't come naturally dad

grab your mic and put it to your mouth okay i guess that was a straight yeah okay okay yeah i guess that was a straight giveaway dad welcome to the show obviously you were probably the number one requested guest that we've had ever that's not true it is and honestly we wanted to wait we really were i think we're very nervous and very excited because we just want to make sure that you know our podcast are you okay you're adjusting okay you guys were expecting yeah come on you guys were probably expecting something a bit

more structured than this this is gonna be the most chaotic episode you're ever gonna get what is it the weather pain like oh you don't need a weatherman to know which way the wind blows here it is folks andy just stand up we wanted to make sure that before we had you come on because you know we want to make you proud we wanted to make sure this episode this podcast everything was just perfect and legitimate and legitimate and i think you know new studio new couch it seems pretty legitimate thanks for coming on today

well you're more than welcome i think people are now starting to realize that you are a secret comedian no i'm not i just think that life belongs to those who can somehow make a sick joke out of it all because it does it works out if you take life too seriously what is that old saying to those who think life is a comedy of those who feel life is a tragedy so i just try to keep it light and lively well that's something that you've always done and that's a side to you that i don't

think a lot of people know and that's why we think this episode would be a great opportunity to ask you questions that maybe might be inappropriate for other interviewers to possibly ask you but we can get away with it because we're your daughters because we're your kids fair enough ask those questions okay difficult i mean yeah let's just get into should we start when you were just a wee little boy a little boy yeah all right let's go into your childhood because you have quite the interesting child yeah oh if you could describe yourself in

three words growing up what would it be seriously yeah okay um loner very uh expressive really loud right going and without a doubt um i'd say i got along very well conversing yeah but it's almost because from what you've told us growing up that you really just had to fend for yourself you were you're kind of like a feral straight kid no really i mean your parents very strange my my parents weren't exactly brought up like stellar human beings either the craziest story i think one of them was the fact that you two i mean

this is i don't know if anyone knows this but your parents dropped you off at like an old folks home when you were younger for the first time no you were left in an elderly home so you were around as a five-year-old 95 year old you were figuring out how to converse with people very quickly because you were able to have these conversations my average friends were like 90. yeah like so you're about five years old yeah at the time i didn't think it was so bad but we look back on it it's not exactly

a smart choice day care centers you have daycare centers today back then they really didn't have they had uh boarding houses really yeah for like traveling salesmen or airlines stewardesses people coming in out so you go down to a boarding table boarding house yes and you'd see 11 strangers the next day there's nine strangers it's a boarding house literally like low rent yeah you know you got some guy who smells like turkey room yo can't wait till he moves on to get that guy smelled like crab back in here he was great oh my god

i mean that probably makes sense for why you like jello so much today is that's probably all you were eating in the old days i do i like food that doesn't require too many intelligence rice pudding and jello exactly applesauce you know so since five years old you're left with strangers you told us countless times the amounts that you've ran away from home i remember a lot i remember one time actually i don't know if you remember this we were in philadelphia maybe four years ago together it was just you and me and we were

just walking through the streets and you were getting nostalgic and you were telling me all these stories and you stopped me on the street corner and you said right here i was 13 years old when i ran away from home and i lit my first cigarette on this corner right here in phoenix i don't know why i thought that was the coolest story ever my dad's smoking a cigarette at 13. but you were really nostalgic about it and i think that's isn't it funny how certain things that get burnt into your memory like certain things

that are just apocalyptic in your life oh my first cigarette which i remember very well as a parliament not it was parliament new filter types like whoa so you get to die a little bit later you know that kind of thing before then cigarettes are not considered bad because they're very cool right so everyone by the time they were 12 or 13 had some pack rolled up in their shoulder yeah it was trendy it was yeah right it was terrible i mean how many times did you run away from home oh my god literally uh

at least a dozen or more but it was never planned for example this is what's so different why i would hate to have raised myself i could have never done it i would put myself up for adoption but i don't blame you i mean no seriously i believe i'm no picnic i had this uh intention disorder kind of a thing i just didn't focus on anything so anything that would become routine or boring i would leave so i become on my way to school 16 years old like oh god i don't go to florida i

want to go to florida and literally start hitchhiking to florida starting at roosevelt boulevard in philadelphia no money in other words whatever i had for lunch and a coat which i'd end up selling outside of a swamp in ocala florida for three bucks which i remember that was my that saved me that three bucks was really important but yeah that's what i would do and then you get to the bottom you get to florida and okay now what i have to get arrested or something because i have to get back to philadelphia no one's going

to volunteer which you did you'd purposely get arrested so then they'd send you home what type of because you were a minor what would you do to get around so clever thank you what would you do well what happened the dumbest thing was if this goes this doesn't bode well for our military either so i'm in ocala florida alone and i just sold my cup for three bucks and i said i got okay i have enough for a meal but i gotta get back to philadelphia and i see a military base and i break onto

the military base but it's so simple it's like really literally how is that simple yeah it's it's a it's a fence it's like not like complicated wasn't like oh sirens guys with machine guns it's like oh my gosh like you expect a guy with a lawnmower behind you going come on in so i went in yeah place is deserted maybe 10 o'clock at night then there's a thing called the px which is where it's kind of like a place you go to eat yeah buy cigarettes i wish i go in there of course everything's locked

up except oatmeal this is why i have such an affinity for oatmeal any soft food well the thing is you never ever put oatmeal in your mouth dry oh you guys heard it here first on the unwaxed podcast make sure you do not eat dry ever i was hungry i said okay look at oatmeal this sounds great quaker oaks guy on the box no how dangerous can it be huh it looks funny yeah just like that and by the time i brought it back oh god that was so jammed up it was so dry you

know it became like sponges i started choking to death so you're choking on an oatmeal in a military base a military base in ocala florida right left right and they came in and i go thank god and do they arrest you and thank god for oatmeal thank you they arrested you and saved you yes they did okay so you were quite the menace as a kid such a menace that you tell us countless stories of how you were kicked out of 13 schools was it 13 or 14 13. 13 schools they would have made 14

but they ran schools so but they weren't regular schools obviously well military schools schools for trouble yeah you have to work your way through again in all fairness to myself okay i wasn't raised in a right way no way my brain has always been flipped sideways it's just the way i've interpreted life that's why now i realize i made the right choice but back then you were a menace right you were going nowhere you were what is known as a juvenile delinquent jd he puts that in questions that was a delinquent that's right you are

a jd so that's when i realized earlier on after they kept sending me to school after school after school he just doesn't fit in i go guys they're like the seventh school right where do i fit in he goes i don't know then we tried it again and they said he just doesn't fit in and we're not gonna allow him back he's such a disruptive force we won't let him back into the state of pennsylvania what did you do and maryland it was banned from the entire maryland school board what montgomery hill it's not it's

not you just having atd in class to get that that is pretty bad no i was that was adventurous do you remember the story you told me about you going to military school and stealing knives from your what would you call your captains or your officers officers so was that the factor that caused you to not even be able to go to school i said how do i get out now i'm in a school where everyone's very physical yeah they all look like they're grown men with full beards i mean they're like 16 17 years

old but they're they've been there and this is the place to get you in order but you're right so they took these kids there from the time they were eight and they'd be there until they're 18 so when they came out at 18 they were tough wow i mean tough there was no love lost this is when you had corporal punishment you take a kid in the back room and just smack the hell out of that that's what it was at this point this school is for troubled kids that need it's military school you're still

at military school here yeah and this is the craziest part not even in the troubled school yet anyway you know this all this stuff is happening these kids are getting hit and they're getting corporal punishment but you still find the need to steal stuff and so you get that same punishment knowing that that could happen that's why i think it's some it's just yes i think there's something to be said about a certain mentality that when you're told not to right away you say ah that's for normal people i can pull this one off yeah

i can do it it's like a stupid dare like oh what are you chicken jump off a building no i'll try it no you're just stupid well no that's that's human behavior exactly right you're not allowed to go out they're gonna sneak out that's my point so i had that over developed sense of competition if you say no that's just well that definitely plays into your character today i think a lot oh yeah just when you say no you mean yes that still plays every conversation everything we have after you know what i think is

so interesting too just like you have that cigarette story you keep um your report card from high school as well and you show you show it all the time you have it i use it as an example why do you use a nice example because it shows that you can fail every class yeah and still end up pretty good right so but you didn't fail every class every class no you didn't fail art class well art yeah but that's you're an artiste it makes sense well if you saw the picture it was a horse with

flies going around his head it wasn't exactly matisse yeah i'm not gonna lie we do have one of your sketches framed from when you were 15. and i go up to mom i'm like why is this up like just because you know a kid paints it doesn't mean i mean i'm i'm not gonna insult your work it's good you are insulting it it's good but you know it's it was it was just like oh you passed insult about 15 minutes ago now we're into like yes no you know no i think can i actually have

all my photos now we're boarding on a lawsuit okay for right deprivation character here oh oh i mean the knot should be issued every single day between all three of us i think the craziest uh schooling you had which is we had this discussion for a really long time that we wanted to make this into a tv show like a horror show was your time at devereaux and this is a school if anyone knows what it is it's in massachusetts or it was i don't know if it's still around and it's a school for troubled

kids like behavioral issues and i think that was like the final straw for every schooling that was that was it i can't believe we're bringing that up you know it's a very well we don't have to get into it that deep we don't but but it's fine perverse it's just a school where you never go home right so give listeners maybe context how how this would be different from a okay they take you at a certain yeah they test you and some some people are sent there by the state but you have to have a

certain pension iq for something you can't just be a horrible human being you have to have like some shining grace something right and i don't know they found it in art but that school was so strict and so difficult that anytime you had a problem you're dealing with another 25 kids in your class every one of them had severe like violent problems or they came from home where they had seriously ish serious issues uh between their parents and them just odd and when you would become truants now you lived there god but if you were

late for classes that or you're flirting with a girl they would take you to a place called well it was called byberry one time no but it's called park lodge and park lodge was a building where they would send lifers to and lifers a person that never gets out it was a stained asylum yeah pretty much insane it's insane and i'm going what am i doing insane assignment all i was doing was talking to a couple of kids but they were using that to this yeah from how old did punish you yeah well how old

were you 16. so you were flirting with girls at this behavioral school and to punish the students they would like have them go as a retreat one week two weeks three weeks no way into a padded cell yeah that's so raw oh it's so wrong until you've been there and you're with people that are in that situation for life again girls this is in the 60s and the world is a different place there's a whole different place back then corporal punishment was normal there was guys would walk around there with all the fellas there were

lifers and a lot of them couldn't talk if you ever saw the film cuckoo's nest yeah that's a joke very nice movie right but it's a almost a fun place it's not fun so the point being i would go through that and you come back into the normal school system and supposedly you learn something not really that much then i realized that people's human nature is pretty well set up at an early age and as long as you're not innately cruel or doing things that are incredibly vindictive to individuals i never saw myself as anything

other than you know misunderstood music like everyone else feels and looking for my place in the world so it was never what you call like an incorrigible horrible human being that was looking to rob or steal or hurt i was looking at anything just mischief yeah you were anything to get out of anything to get out of schooling right right so yeah and that's what you did and i want to touch on the fact that you said you just did what you could to survive because i feel like that's been your entire life's journey so

far yeah so you make it out of devroe you're now a young adult and i would love to sort of get into your early career because you have probably the most abnormal resume i have ever heard in my life i mean just to name a few you were a lion cage cleaner a bouncer you cut fish you were an usher good fish i want to get into that book salesman why were you a volleyball coach in switzerland oh i have to say something i was i was actually i was in new york last week yeah

and there was a man cutting fish and i don't know i stopped in the street and i said to myself my dad used to do that that's right but but what do you what how were you a fish cutter i was such a good fish cutter i i don't but i have a hard time believing i'm serious your mother was with me am i right we went to look at a home someone had for sale and the guy was maybe 85 years old he goes i know you you used to cut the best fish always

dover delic am i lying i believe you you could read through it i was for some reason some reason me and friendship you and fish of course you get complaints everyone ah it's not thick enough but yeah i would do that and just do a lot of these odd jobs because i thought if i do all these horrible jobs at night it would leave the day open to go out and pursue my alleged career and nothing was happening so i would take any random job from bodyguards to this to chasing people to chasing people yeah

i would chase people out of bookstores if they robbed if they were up yeah they don't change so through all of these oddball jobs odd jobs did you get fired from many of them everyone okay which one were you the best out there i was fantastic at being an usher why actually i can see that because people oh it's an usher i said no you don't get it usher i can go to class eight hours a day and watch a film how it's broken down how it's written how it's truly uh constructed and deconstructed because

i watch it every day and i started taking notes and i became really good at understanding editorial right yeah and we ended up winning an oscar for best edition was that your introduction to that was my introduction to it yeah so i thought okay let me just take this horrible job but i know there's a plan there isn't like okay i i went to four years of college to become an usher no i went to four years of college to eventually do something in the arts right and i said here it is this is a

no-brainer so at that point when you were in usher and you're watching the film and you're breaking it down in your head were you wanting to be an actor or were you wanting to be a screenwriter editor director all right the acting was i'm starting to realize this is never going to happen people are saying oh you have a speech impediment your mouth is crooked you slur and i got somebody something i don't know i know that they said well it's just not going to work maybe you'll be an extra so i started to buy

into that you know hmm because every time i was cast it was always for a thug yeah can you imagine i always thought i'd be like hugh grant is like i selling book there's a love interest yeah what are you saying no for over there mom's saying no come on you married me it had to be something okay she's so shy she thinks you're funny i know she doesn't think i'm funny show up a heart attack oh yeah my wife is the shyest person you know what you've always said to us though was that um

no matter what we do in life always learn how to write because regardless of anything because i mean that's what kind of i guess yeah you don't have to be a good writer exactly you just have to write and and eventually that'll your inner thoughts will come to the surface and take care of themselves to be a gifted writer it's it's freakish like you can be a really gifted actor in a terrible writer terrible director you don't have to know what your niche is so anyway acting i realized i was always going to play the

thug i was always going to be the mugger i was always beating up woody allen or beating up jack lemmon or beating up who's the guy that played david carradine actually david carrington beat me up that's when i realized i said enough is enough i can't i can't take it anymore in death race 2000 and that's when i started to focus on the written word and i was not very good i was i would like to talk about the fact that you just said that you're never good because people tend to pursue careers or hobbies

at things that they know they're good at or at least they think that they're good at but writing is one of those things that either you go to school and you're taught how to do it or you're just naturally gifted and and that's something that just pours out of you but you're saying i knew i wasn't a good writer so what made you continue to write because i never passed an english course in other words when you say good writer i use that terminology and you understand the inner workings and outer workings of the english

language in other words you understand how to deconstruct and construct a sentence how to diagram a sentence i don't know what a pronoun is an adjective not me but you don't need to know i understand but you do they do teach you that you need to know that people will grade you then you go to college you're turning your term paper and you've turned it in the way i turn it in they say you're an idiot but but the difference is it's the way people speak how did you teach yourself then i just just an

ear did you read a lot was it like i did i did read a lot i i didn't read when i was in college and then i started when i was broke i would spend hours in the new york library just looking for subject matter or something and then eventually i came across edgar allan poe and i said what do i have to do with this guy nothing zero a he's a stone genius he's a poet laureate he's an incredible writer and i mean he would have been the most amazing director you know was he

he didn't have that visual is he what changed everything for you but here's what changed me folks is when you start to get something that's out of your wheelhouse for example writing about poe i was no longer writing about what i did last summer or my adventure or how i got along with my mother it was about another subject so now i became a writer about another subject so you became an investigator he became yeah more you're exploring in other words you became a vehicle for writing that's not just about you yeah like you'll see

some things like woody allen he'll do 80 of his material is him right about his life that's what he does and he does it well whereas i thought no i'm never going to get out of this until i start writing about someone else's life and that was the beginning of poe and then from poe i did a thing called cheerful charlie which is an incredible story about you've written over 45 screenplays so did you going off of what you just said was writing outside of your wheelhouse writing about people and and stories that weren't about

you was that sort of an escape from your own yeah it was you know especially writing female parts like when you write adrian people go oh rocky rocky's not a if rocky if someone says rocky's a sports film again i want to wait why does that upset you yeah because it's not what is it sports film clear it up right now what is rocky is a love story about a guy who's a broken down fighter that's all it is right it's never about money it's never about oh i became champion oh i want to be

champion i just put something together so you love edgar allan poe his brain his love stories his emotions and then you always used to tell us you used to look up to hercules as a physical being do you think that's like a combination of the two with rocky oh my god it is great think about it because hercules is he didn't he go from like zero to hero and then you have edgar allan poe who's like immensely in love with this what was it um penelope what was her name annabelle ah maybe i just unlocked

something that you didn't even realize so you're saying because i like hercules and i like poe you've just discovered something yeah well i realize that's rocky no but i think you might have hit on something because you were saying that i think that's what something even that i do i think even system does and a lot of people do is to sometimes see like a better version of themselves they start to create a different character in you right you probably saw i mean is that how you started rocky did you always love boxing before no

no it's okay i just saw it as a very very easy sport to figure out do you think that's easy i mean it's pretty simple and then you realize how much skill goes into it which is extraordinary and it'll also add the life and death aspect of it but boxing i realize people are obsessed with two things in life racing and boxing in every aspect oh you gotta race to beat the club you gotta race you get your thing on time where you get your tax returns race race race race race you get your finals

on it's always going somewhere time is up so and people will bet on how fast this phone falls this i mean anything nothing's off limits for for racing for time and i thought okay what's the other thing that everyone relates to symbolically fighting as soon as a guy walks into the room he slides up another guy's oh how would i last against him i mean everything is a competitive mm-hmm and then it gets down to you realize life is a big battle man there's like there's no flat spots jesus you solve one problem then you

got another one you got this job then you got a terrible relationship we got a good relationship but it falls apart one thing after another fighting so i thought if i could write a story that deal with a guy that deals with a guy who's a slumpy guy who on the outside looks like a real tough guy should maybe have it together he has nothing together yeah and and people can relate to that yeah because he doesn't even think of himself as tough he's just a loser and he admits he's a loser there's so much

that people can relate to within the film and i think that aside from it being a love story obviously it highlights the message of not giving up and people really resonate with that and i think a lot of you know fans of yours don't know or maybe they do if they're a true fan don't know how strong that message is held even before rocky or while rocky was being written because for example your living situation as you were writing rocky i mean you said that you would have newspapers on your walls to keep you warm

like what were you what was your living situation as you were writing the first rock you painted the windows black to focus yeah i did paint in black because i don't know what time it didn't matter what time it was you know so oh you got to get oh it's time for breakfast right away you've just you derailed yourself right i'll i'll have breakfast but i'm hungry i don't need to know what time it is that kind of thing so i was trying to eliminate all the excuses because it's hard to write and you're looking

for any reason please someone call that's why i took the phone out so you couldn't be called so you were straight focused painted black one of those black windows and it was a two-way phone but that actually makes a lot of sense because even today when you're writing and you go into your zones and i know mom knows this for a fact you'll wake up at around two in the morning and then you'll go back to bed around seven in the morning i mean your schedule is crazy but i didn't know that you would do

that even when you were writing rocky and that's really clever well i don't know if it's clever it just seems like that's just writing style i think somewhat of a genetic dispensation to have this kind of the writing gives it to you it's kind of like a gift that it will tell you when to write when not to write but writing i'll tell you right now is a miserable means of existence it is terrible is there anything you like about no there's nothing you love you love the end result you love the fact that you

have it on paper i respect writing and believe it but the process itself and i've discussed this with so many writers look at writers they look it's true ready to kill themselves yes they're all worn out they're tired they live in their own heads like psychologically they're torn to shreds because they can never be in the moment they can never be in this right now if i was writing a screenplay i'd be going i said i'm working oh yeah hi hello but i'm still going god i gotta say you said to you so you're torn

like that and that's why a lot of uh alcoholics i mean uh writers become alcoholic right right they do well i'm sure not knowing what time it was for you would definitely spun you out in a bad way but obviously it worked out because how you wrote the scripture three days yeah four days three days no no i thought it was a it was a four days three and a half days three and a half oh i thought it was a week no because again i tell young people that want to be writers don't get

so hung up on the perfection know that 90 of it is garbage the fact that you got through that's amazing that you actually got a beginning middle and then no matter how flawed that's the hard part because 90 of the writers they go up to about page 80 and they burn out page 90 burn out they don't have that finale if you happen to have an any man you're home free how did you feel going from being literally a kid kicked out of 13 schools selling your dog all the stuff having barely any money to

scrape by to instant stardom it's it's kind of shocking because they're in lies a terrible attribute that people actually it's a character flaws not an attribute where you tend to seek out revenge i told you so i told you so i told you so so now you become a bit more belligerent i warned you this is that and it's like a fighter after having won a victory you're standing over your opponent like this you know you don't need to do that you want you're knocked out you proved your point that's that to me was my

biggest problem and it took years to work that out because right you open your mouth up and you burn a few bridges and that was foolish were you applying that i told you so towards agencies movie studios or was it just the world mostly critics critics okay mostly critics is that you couldn't do it this and that or there's certain ways that you come into this business and i came in a very obtuse way so i wasn't exactly everyone's favorite i'm like an anomaly so i didn't work my way up in other words some actors

say oh de niro did this and petrino went to that clay and he yeah they worked their way up they earned it right and so they said you didn't earn it well they said i just put it this way who is this guy you know like where did he come from what are his credentials he's okay i guess for an amateur that kind of a thing no it's all right i i get it i get it it's no big deal that's what sells papers but the point is you're supposed to hopefully just let it go

because you've got the you won you got the prize if you sit there and flaunt it that's what's really horrible and that's what like a lot of guys make that and i see it happening and i go oh man i want to give this guy a call and say just take your win and leave don't sit there and grind and make these critics a fool and that critics are full and it's not true it's just that's not how the business works listen you've had critics since they were doing plays of antigone back in you know

ancient greece it's always been that way but i don't know if you learned that lesson until later on in life i probably haven't i'm probably just talking crap i haven't learned it at all i think what exactly what you're saying right now i think you do right now 100 but were you that way when you were by the rocky iv comes along you're already known you're already famous but are you still having that sort of attitude of saying yeah yeah that's what i'm saying so when did you realize what age did this realization i think

when you almost lose it i had a real down period say around 95 when i did complain 95 96 and i said oh let me do something really off you know off my out of my comfort zone and i did it and i was very happy with the project but actually it set me way back why it just the studios are going why would you do that man you did that for nothing why would why would you just do an action film i said because i was gonna do it i was going to do an

action film next i was just trying to prove a point to myself and whoever cared he go well that doesn't make us look good because you're doing this for free and why would we pay you anyway it began a very bad spiral for about eight years eight years did you write anything in between that no i mean i couldn't imagine as a very successful actor not working what does that do to an actor's ego jennifer do you want to ask my wife about that what do you what do you think mom well i'm not probably

can't hear me but it was it was um we had sophia and then we had you sistine so i just stayed being a mom she stayed busy i stayed neurotic he stayed neurotic we just kind of left him in the movie theater watching films all day for years and years and years and years i said you know i'm going to try to make one last rocky and nobody wanted to do it the producer said over my dead body it's never going to happen it was really it's a real wake-up call yeah yeah noah no one

wanted to do it and we happened to be in a restaurant one night and we met a fellow who named joe and you should admit great you know joe yeah anyway uh i don't get him in trouble or anything right so he goes yeah it's a great it sounds a good story bring it on over so i brought over it because my wife know you guys the screenplay my wife read it and she cried and went down now we're there now we're in mom brought you back from the dead of 16 yeah she's cheering because

she knows she did hold on jennifer was the one that created rocky balboa well she started the introduction which therefore created my mom sent the script over to the wife right mom well i sent the script to joe you didn't do anything ah ah but okay mama so i'm every strong man is a stronger woman all right i'll give her a credit but i have a question what was the worst film you've done and what was your favorite film to do worse film rhinestones just kidding that was my favorite you installed for my no listen

i had fun on that movie you in in in chaps with dolly parton were you kidding me that's your peek that was i feel like that is actually who you are no i think that's closer to whoever i'm saying people think he's more rambo you're way more rhinestone yeah way more or oscar when you tried to do coffee oh my god awesome that's funny you're you're a funny guy in life i don't know if comedy is your thing well there's another thing i think you built a certain kind of image yeah and like if clint

eastwood came in here right now and did one of the great comedy routines no look at it see already going i don't know i'd be afraid to laugh because he may shoot me that's the point but i feel like that's what people feel like that they do they do they do so i have to realize you're not exactly the comedic type looking you just don't fit that thing so therein lies the issue right yeah so but it took a few comedies to figure that out and even though i love comedies it was a disaster wow

you're also savant honestly this guy knows everything about everything he'd probably tell you where this couch was built i know that couch is built yeah right outside of italy there are no couple a buck tooth brothers who make no but you know it's crazy he may not know how to fix my mom is probably the one that will know how to fix like the pool heater or whatever but you'll know where what year michelangelo did a painting or i would say mom is more the hands on deck and then dad's more of the uh yeah

sporadic intelligence it helps you know we're not bathroom reading you'd be surprised after a while you're an encyclopedia yeah he does have like he does have like 16 books next to his toilet yeah have you ever seen it he has like that you have a library card you're going to like literally has like stacks of books next to it that's so funny that's why you spend so much time well maybe i use it for toilet paper did you ever think of that level okay you know what i honestly think that if rocky was never written

and imagine your life then right i think you'd be a stand-up comedian i don't because listen you push the envelope he does he says things that are inappropriate but funny and people relate i've been on i've been on good behavior today i know you have i know this is really something you'd be good at that for sure i know but i think there's so many better people at it yes i mean yes i mean first of all to be a great comedian it's it's a lot of work and there's a lot of darkness yeah and

it's a lot of spending your time home feeling miserable you got to turn that into somehow a comedy routine you did that for eight years i know i get it i enjoy it okay i enjoy it but you just can't turn around and change something that's been around for 50 years yeah like all of a sudden we're now changing this mayonnaise and this will be fruit gums mayonnaise no it's fruit gums from now on you're just not gonna all of a sudden switch something so drastic like that but you know that's i think we're if

you guys are wondering why we have a show called unwaxed a lot of our personality and i think our sense of humor does come from you we have a very raw dry humor and that's probably why we're still extremely single is because no one can take it seriously also you do scare them but at the same time i think that loving happiness is overrated girls it doesn't happen so what should we expect yeah i want you to have misery and it's solitude funny though because when you when we were growing up you would always tell

us as young girls that we weren't allowed to get married until we were 45. i think that's and i honestly believed that yeah until i was about i still believe in it yeah what is wrong with it i think it's a great idea still yeah why what's the rush i get no rush but 45. well i'll tell you why because at one time 45 was your life expectancy and you've already had about 11 kids at 45. [Applause] that's pretty much it okay okay okay but how was it being in a household full of girls because

now you are with literally even all girl dogs except buster or one dog like was it like how is it like how is it with all girls in the house oh god it's like being in a cuisinart head first just lowered into like when you when you're trying to break down ice cubes okay but there must be there's just that noise it makes is there anything you like yeah come on about you guys no no no yeah i guess anything or am i no i love my girl listen listen i love my girls they're they're

almost almost trouble free they've been nothing but a pleasure they inherit luckily from their mother their morality and their sense of humor i guess you might say yeah but i think i think what's funny and a lot of people don't know is although you have three daughters it's always you know i guess with mom it's always four against one you raised us like macho men yeah and it's so interesting whenever i tell the story to people they truly don't believe me so i guess it might be better coming from you but when we were in

middle school from maybe second grade to high school yeah you would wake us up every day at 6 00 a.m for sure we'd have to go downstairs push-ups sit-ups clean clean jerk dead lift throw shot put you're in the army now no but we guys guys guys we had a little four pack when we were in middle school and i wish i was kidding like four packs genuinely look at our like photos when we're wearing bathing suits we had abs because of not only that you made us recite poetry every single day into a tape

recorder every single day and that was the thing is what i liked about the way you raised us was none of my girlfriends could possibly relate to it because their dad would do normal dad stuff whereas like what what is normal dead stuff normal like let me touch your peanut butter and jelly into four oh my gosh where's you that's it how about some flapjacks girl that's really what i'm saying what i can tell them is that they cannot relate to you at all is did your dad make you speak uh into a tape recorder

and recite poetry and works now we know the raven by part but one other one do you know that was so great anyway i wanted them to articulate and hit these words known as plosive sounds like and so you put a piece of uh i don't know [Applause] every day he would tape a napkin to her forehead so she had his napkin taped to her nose and they learned to be so loud loud yeah and very dramatic yeah it was nice what was going through your so with the workouts in the morning because i wanted

someone to do it for me and i said okay i would like this i would like this for sure who wouldn't want we weren't allowed to do any other field sports except shot put no i wanted your girls to do something that you would be called upon never to do but when you do you would be ready but guess what i broke the record at school so you did actually she they were there was eight events and you won seven of them and they pulled you out of the eighth one no we were definitely raised

as full-on tomboy well i just thought it'd be interesting to take them and put you into sports that normally aren't akin to women yeah like traveling shut foot boxing power lifting but you know what was funny is that you were so into us doing sports and anything physical activity that any time it was involving school mom was out of town if she was working you wouldn't drive us to school for that week yeah this was by the way one of my favorite memories with you by far mom was always on the road working and whenever

she would leave you actually taught me what hooky was in the fourth cookie is it and i said once hooky i remember we were driving past my school and the top was down it was raining and you didn't care the rain was coming into the car yeah i had my school uniform on the gates were closed because we were about four hours late to school and we just kept driving i said the school's right here and you go no do you know what hooky is and i said no and he goes we're about to go

on the best adventure of your life and so every time mom would go out of town i'd be like it's time for hooky and we can just explore and have so much i'm a big believer that you can learn more out there than you can sometimes in the classroom so i learned whatever i learned while i'm here i learned out there isn't it so fascinating what a kid will remember like that it is that is amazing because i would have thought you would have ratted me out and said no trying to be good too i

just remembered something that was horrible they used to do do you remember for four years we believed that he was an american idol that was rude i told kids in my class i told everybody in my class you were so it was we were watching american idol and you were like i was do you remember this mom we came into the room i think we're in fifth grade and we were watching it and you were like yeah you know i was on it we go no and he goes yeah yeah no they didn't want me

to continue because i was too good and we've yeah guys it's true you i you idolize your dad like you you're we're daddy you are the greatest guy we told for literally four years we believed that they just didn't air it i don't know why we didn't question that and then all of a sudden you like you came up to us and we brought it up to someone and you were like you actually believed that yeah yeah was sad but i knew it wasn't true when one girl came up to me and said you're a

liar and i was in second grade i go no my dad doesn't lie to me that's right yeah you did no you did your big time but it's okay she's a liar there chris yeah but you were you were really you'll find her if opposite day was a person that's you i mean it was ice cream for breakfast pancakes for dinner well you know it sounds like like the beginning of a good movie here like right daddy yeah at the end daddy's day off here i never fuel her it's so funny because every time i

think about even when it comes like marriage or proposal i don't think you're gonna be the dad that's gonna sit there going a guy like asking for your hand in marriage i cannot see you sitting there seriously going yes sir this is what god would do he'd put out his hand and you'd pull his finger and make a fart joke yeah that literally would do that's what you would do i gotta see where he's like how was he gonna handle stress oh god oh he's like no seriously girls these guys will come on they'll say

everything like they'll they'll be the most perfect individual on the planet until that day when you because you really don't know anyone until you've gotten into a serious argument then you understand what a person is made up are they forgiving are they not are they uh explosive are they gentle learn a lot i actually am learning a lot from you because you are i would say more involved in my dating life than most sponsorships or daughters or guys like the guys that we date realize no they don't realize that every time i break up with

them it's actually sly breaking up without me like none of it is my words whatsoever he's written every breakup text i don't feel sorry about one of them by the way and they always give a great response i do have to say for some reason you are savant when it comes to dating for millennials it's actually amazing you really are he i know no no you know how to get rid of guys we also know how to like us to trick them into falling in love with us too you're like i can tell you what

you're not supposed to do that's why why can't you do that because i tell you i don't think you should lead people on if you're not into it then don't be into it it's true you are very one thing you were really instilled in us is safety don't lead people on because that's when people snap yeah and you don't want that i have a question what do you think of the guys that we've dated losers oh dad come on yeah they're not shaking her and going come on they're nice i'm only kidding guys i'm just

doing this for the benefit of the microphone you know what's funny though no they've been very nice guys they really have and i'm you know i do not believe in all of you mom's giving them the death card to just say this they are nice guys right mom loves them she sits at 2 a.m the first i i love this story because this i think is like the first true experience i've ever had i was the first to have a boyfriend or anything and i think that when you're the guinea pig you never really know

what to expect when you bring a boyfriend home and this is in high school and i brought my high school boyfriend over for the first time meeting the parents and do you remember what you did to him when he you shook his hand yeah yeah sort of it was tight you you were tight you gripped it yeah and after you said next time shake my hand like a man oh well i was a little carried away but yes dad he was 17. he was tall for his age though no he wasn't sure he was short

every time we bring a guy over i tell them before they go through the front door please just grip my dad's hand hard because for some reason he'll test you right there and like that'll tell him listen i'm i'm only joking your boyfriends you scared the out of them you know actually that's not true these guys are big guys i was getting dropped off for a date one time right yeah it's my third day i don't know maybe i was 19. i was hoping for perhaps a kiss at the end of the night and relax

from him not from me look and i look up no he looks up we're outside our house listen listen to the story you're ruining my story who's the jump bag you thought i was going to do that gross even listening to what you're saying listen sort of really kiss him all right i'm gonna start over okay he pulls up our driveway ah right perhaps the date and myself might kiss go he looks up and goes holy is that your dad and he looks up on the balcony on the second floor the lights are pitch black

except you have one light in your bathroom coming behind you so it's just a black silhouette of you standing looking over down and he got in this car and that was last time i saw him he never came back he never called me back after that come on and i always say i always call him that was the one that got away dude you actually i always say you literally turn into king shark you say one word to these guys you go um no he didn't have to say anything you're like the grim reaper over

there in the corner do you think it's harder to satisfy me or sofia you i mean no no no no you you you you yes time what would you say sophia jennifer thank you mother said sofia that's obvious okay i don't think it's bad to have high standards okay now it's high standards it was difficult now it's high standards it was picky it was height now i'm not hard to take because yeah no it's oh well okay okay you and mom have been together i mean married for 25 years but been together for 35 yeah

two three yeah what do you think is like the secret to keeping that long version she's the greatest she is smiles a lot she can't help her though she keeps covering her teeth and it doesn't help because her teeth are longer than her her teeth are longer than her fingers so i stick out like that it's like an elephant trying to cover his tusks like that's the thing it's like you constantly roast her you wrote me like oh i love her but her teeth she's too nice to come in my little piano like dad so

what is this what do you think it is i don't know i just enjoy her company i just she's so fun in a in a naive way because she actually means what she's saying yeah that's what i think is so funny you always say this you always say that mom is the only person that you've had in your entire life that you can hang out with every single day you're like the only person i don't get annoyed with after that's true right no she doesn't tell you this part she hides [Laughter] i can't find her

if i'm in a house i'm in a house i cannot find her for 12 hours actually watching your guys's relationship did i would say for both sistine and i showed that you guys are very very fun with each other no matter what i have a lot more fun i have a lot more fun with her than she has with me i think no she i think mom's a little fiery sometimes really yeah oh yeah really mom's got a sharp tongue did you say fiery boy she needs a hearing aid there she goes there's that time

hey we call mom the town crier she is she's a nice word for being a big mouse yes it is everything what she's a big mouth what are you i wouldn't say i'm a big mouth no if she's the big mouth what are you i don't know baby i'm kind of like certain i'm the insult it's all about me see it's all about me you guys that's your that's your fallback position it's all about me yeah yeah the worst thing he's ever done was get an instagram account it's made him even worse it's like oh

actually i enjoy it thank you no i honestly think instagram is good for you you're connecting with your younger generation i'm going on tick tock next oh god for sure that's it now you've done it now you've thrown down the ground that is officially the most embarrassing thing you can do yeah i really want you to hear our tick actually i don't even think he'll know how to use i'm not teaching you i'm not teaching i don't need to help anyone be on youtube i'm going to keep posting videos i can't get a tick tock

coach tick tock coach i can't okay you know what jennifer right no no no next time you said no that's it she got you well that rules you're sorry butt out oh my god no but it's funny i actually do love all of our dating stories dad this was something we've been looking forward to for the last 50 episodes and i'm really really thankful that you came on and did this this is like a really big you were pretty well behaved yeah i have to say it was not easy it was not easy i could

tell you're squirming and you're ready you're ready but thank you guys so much for tuning in to our 50th episode of the unwax podcast make sure you're subscribed get ready to follow along on our instagram our youtube page what else are we on where can they find you oh my instagram did you just say that did you just say that's a joke i'm being sarcastic i'm under it official slides alone on instagram he's here he said he's under hashtag schwarzenegger true okay cool but thank you guys for tuning in and we will see you next

week say bye dad bye dad oh god [Music] you