The Beauty and Behavior of a Godly Woman

okay wives you go I think the assumption here in 3 1 to 6 is that the husband is an unbeliever somebody might say likewise wives be subject to your own husband's so that even if some do not obey the word they may be won without a word by the conduct of their wives might simply mean a believing husband who's disobedient I don't think so but it would certainly apply in those situations because this phrase obey the word has at least two other situations its obey the truth in 122 I think we said was how you

the heart is purified because it was the truth is the gospel and in 417 it talks about the believers and those who do not obey the gospel so get those 3 instances obey word obey truth obey gospel I think they all mean the same thing and refer to faith I think this is an unbelieving husband and some of you in this room are in that situation or if you're in a situation where he's just he claims to be a believer but he you don't see any fruit principles would be the same here let's read and

see what specifics we can learn here wives be subject so now we've got be subject to government's be subjects my message be subject to husbands you see the motif this is uh this is simply taking the humility and the deferential bent of the new person in Christ and applying it to a situation of particular relationship in Paul's mind there is a unique kind of submission of laws to husbands that he does they Paul Peter of wives to husbands here what is it what's it like is it demeaning is she doormat what is it let's let's

let Peter fill up this concept you may you may have real positive feelings about that word because your experience you may have horrible feelings about this idea and and so let's not let our experience to dominate here likewise wives be subject to your own husbands so that even if some do not obey the word they may be won that's another reason that I think it's unbelief because that language in the New Testament for winning people is usually for salvation may be won without a word by the conduct of their wives you know in in the

context I don't think without a word means they can't talk to each other that would be naive wouldn't it they they don't talk to each other ever in this marriage I don't think so and it can't mean he doesn't have a clue what she stands for he didn't have a clue what's going on in her life and what's changed about her when she got converted so somehow that that communication happens I think I think without a word means preaching nagging reminding word is not gonna not gonna be the key here something like that without a

word by the conduct of their wives so it shifts from word to conduct knowing that if the man's gonna be one it already says back in one twenty three to twenty five we are born again through the living about inward this is the gospel which you heard nobody's born again without the word so he's got to know the word whether it comes from him/her or somebody else that's got to happen and I don't think he's forbidding a wife from sharing with her husband what's happened to her at the meeting with some friends and she she

met Jesus and now this relationship is difficult more difficult when they see when husbands see your now there's that word respectful which I already tried to explain in fear when they see you're in fear and pure conduct so conduct is the dominant issue here do not let your adorning be external the braiding of hair the putting on of gold jewelry or the clothing you wear now what in the world is he bring that up for you're talking about submission he's talking about a conduct that might win the husband over to Christianity and he introduces jewelry

and hairstyles and clothing why here's my guess you tested my guess is that now as well as then some women might default to I could win him if I'm pretty enough I could win if I'm sexy enough I could I could win him if I just if I've stood out from all the other women then he might he might want me more and and what me more he might want my faith more and Peter says that will work he's just seem that that strategy will not save sinners it won't you he might like you yeah

might like that sexy dress he might whatever whatever you may try to do that's not gonna win him to what we're trying to do here I think that might be what's going on here that he and others he's trying to just say to him and don't go about it the wrong way don't don't put a premium on your hair and a premium on your complexion and a premium on your figure and a premium on your clothing thinking that's gonna have a spiritual effect on the guy now don't go to the other extreme either okay this

word right here subject would mean she does take into account his desires and she wants basically to please him I mean husbands and wives want to please I'm gonna get to the men in a minute that's big deal with the men live together with your wives according to knowledge it's gonna be a big deal but but so in others when I say don't worry about your hair don't worry about your figure don't worry about your clothes I don't mean frumpy everything in its own place and for the Christian woman Madison Avenue and and TV ads

and the standards of what women look like when they walk modeling aisles is not your standard Christ is your standard and that's where he's gonna that's where he's gonna go let your adorning verse 4 let your adorning be the hidden person I love this you're a person you're not a body to be gawked at I was praying the other day human I'm a 16 year 69 year old males are still males okay which means we have a bent towards sexual attraction looking at things we shouldn't look at or looking too long at what we might

look at innocently or whatever you know so long in the airport and my eyes are flashing here and there's people walk by and I'm just whispering to the Lord God help me to see women's I don't mean makeup I mean that's where the person is I want to see people not bodies help me know what this is no women in - but women here you're you're a person not a body to be decorated and and what's that get straight then the body will fall into line with appropriate clothing and appropriate makeup in a Coquette hair

and and all the other things that are appropriate but it's not your God now what you're gonna do or please don't live for that but that you're adorning be the hidden person of the heart with the in perishable same thing with regard to our inheritance imperishable beauty of a gentle and quiet and and if this right here has a negative connotation for you try the word serene or tranquil like you see well we're supposed be quiet we don't always have to be quiet never a lot of talk did I doubt that in this verse especially

that verse was supposed to land on women with painful constraint but rather beautiful serenity like a a pond or a lake that is serene it's tranquil because he's gonna say in just a minute don't be afraid of anything and these are my kind of women he's describing here fearless before American collapse fearless for your kids fearless in the face of difficulty at church fearless these are you'll see it and the strength is coming from inside the strength is not being built up like like if you look at movie stars and whatnot who always you know

they're trying to strike a pose with with how sexy their clothes are how sexy their figure is how sexy their hair is on how sexy everything is why do they do that power that's why they know what men fall for or gawk at it feels powerful I get looks I'm effective in my body I can do this and Paul is just Peter's just saying the power is good and I'll tell you where power resides power is in a personhood in a heart person heart beauty that gentle-like returning good for evil with mighty resolve not to

do any more than Jesus did when he hung on the cross quiet serene tranquil in spirit which in God's sight is very very precious and he gives a reason for why he's saying that kind of strength or that kind of inner demeanor for this is how the holy women he's back to this issue of holiness now that's that's our calling men and women these on women there's a female holiness it's not what you're living for holiness the holy women is a beautiful phrase the holy women well where did they get this who hoped in God

there's the key right there do you hope in your husband's approval do you hope and your husband's conversion do you hope in the in men around you liking what they see or do you hope in God and by that it doesn't mean you don't want your husband be converted you don't want to have an impression you don't want people to look upon you with favor it means you've got priorities here and God is all God it's all my hope is in God I'm getting my identity from God I'm getting my satisfaction from God I'm getting

my hope in my future my joy from God and now in that freedom I must submit to my husband in the Earth's prayer and hope that he will come alongside me and I'll be able to delight in his the holy woman hoped in God used to adorn themselves this way gentle quiet spirit they adorn themselves by submitting to their own husbands as Sara uses controversial word obeyed obeyed Abraham calling him Lord that's pot let's let me linger there with Amit because there's something really interesting here Sara obeyed Abraham , calling him Lord now if I

were writing this and I wanted to illustrate for the women in Cappadocia Pontus and Asia methania what submission looked like in the life of Sarah I talked about Egypt and Abimelech remember that story I'm going down there and he sees she's pretty Abraham's scared that he might get knocked off so she could belong to the harem he says let's say you're my sister what then they're gonna take and she did it not a word that's submission why did he use that that's incontrovertible submission she went along with that harebrained idea he didn't use that he

he says she called him Lords I can go back in the Old Testament where did she do that God in the form of these persons shows up and says sirs gonna have a baby next year and she laughs in her tent and in and then they criticize her for laughing you did laughs and she simply says if I wrote it down yeah Genesis 1812 so Sarah laughed to herself saying after I am worn out and my lord is old shall I have pleasure that's the only place she calls him Lord in Genesis what are you

here why did you choose that Sarah laughed to herself saying after I am worn out and my lord is old shall I have pleasure it's like milord look my lord this my lord that my lord dance lickle I don't know why but here's my guess okay understand I'm not God here I'm guessing that he he went back there looking for some kind of illustration that he wanted and he picked this because it was precisely because it was not a big deal but a default way of talking in her default moments she spoke of him with

that kind of respect maybe in other words does she do you as a wife have to work hard to think in terms of okay what my husband be the leader in this family and I want to be a good partner and responder and supporter that leadership and that's that's what I want to submit and I can work at that it doesn't come naturally for me or is there a somebody's talking with you about your husband whether you use the word milord I mean not probably in our culture would be weird but you know you know

how you talk with other women especially either respectfully or not of him I had a big counseling issue recently where a husband said I just looked on my wife's private Facebook I mean I'm linked I'm linked with her and I saw a conversation show up where she was talking to another woman about me and it was so so meaning I shouldn't happen Sarah in her default behind-the-scenes moments is speaking words that are respectful just just a little it's just a little thing little thing in Genesis 18 and I think it's brought out just to show

how natural it was for women who hoped in God were holy women she obeyed Abraham calling him Lord and you are her children now it gets even better you are her children if you do good same thing he's been saying all along good deeds making Christian life beautiful if you do good and do not fear anything that is frightening so if any of you women ever feel like the call to be submissive to a husband is a position of weakness you're missing the point this is a fearless woman and the need to be fearless when

you have an unbelieving husband in that culture might be bigger than your need for fearlessness because I don't really know my culture well enough to know what his freedoms were but men are in their worst moments mean creatures cruel and abusive and scary to get married to one of those so she's fear less so she tries to win him without a word keeps her conduct pure I'm summarizing now from my notes here she says classy looks is not the way that's gonna work I want to please God with a tranquil and serene and quiet spirit

I want to hope in God not hope in marriage and I hope in my husband's conversion but hope in God and out of that deep confident hope in God is my my shepherd and my Savior in my Lord I'm gonna submit to my husband and unless he asked me to sin who's got that same qualifier to do with the government and I'm gonna load the good deeds into my life so he sees that I don't live for myself and I'm gonna be fearless in at all