Friends 7x09 The One with All the Candy

I'm ready you sure uh-huh okay let me just straighten out your helmet there thanks Daddy no no one daddy two mommies all right it's all yours okay okay there you go there you go Ben's first big kids bike this is so exciting oh yeah I remember mine it was my sixth birthday my dad took me to the par Mark and I got on it and it bent yeah I never had a bike on my own what well we didn't have a lot of money know but the girl across the street had the best bike it

was pink and it had rainbow color tassles hanging off the handle grips and and and a bell and this big white wicker basket with those plastic daisies stuck on that sounds like my first bike my dad gave me his old one did the girl ever let you ride it no but she gave me the box that it came in it had a picture of the bike on the front so I would sit on it and my stepdad would drag me around the backyard that is so unfair not really I got to drag him around too

no one told you that was going to be this way the job a joke you broke love lives the way it's like you're always stuck in second year when it hasn't been your day your week your month even your year us I'll be there for you there for [Music] Meo [Music] hey what do you guys do making holiday candy for the Neighbors I'm sorry who I'm going to hang this basket on the door and then when the neighbors walk by they can all take a piece but we don't know the neighbors I do there's a

let's say guy with a mustache smokes a lot lady and kids I've seen and a red-haired guy who does not like to be called Rusty oh oh I know that guy he also doesn't like it when you say back off howdy Duty I'm engaged you got hit on by firebeard see this is exactly why I'm making this candy we can learn their names and get to know our neighbors it would be easier if we just moved good morning a somebody's in a good mood well why shouldn't I be I have great friends I have a

wonderful job you can make out with your assistant on it's not a big deal we stayed up all night coming up with a plan so that us dating will not be a problem oh yeah what's the plan we we are not going to let it be a problem wow it took you all night to come up with that plan oh well you know we did other stuff too did you two oh Monica come on you know I don't sleep with guys on the first date Matt wire Mark Lyn Ben W anymore okay hi tag um

I have a conference call today is that correct yes at 4: okay thank you that'll be all wait did you see that that male guy had no idea there was something going on between [Music] us I better get back to my desk okay hard worker I'll remember to put that in your evaluation my what well you've been here for 2 months now and your boss is required to hand in a performance evaluation but you know there is one thing that I have yet to evaluate are you serious no I've just always wanted to do that

can you help me clean this up so excited to see if anyone ate my candy me too you don't have to do that thanks the basket is totally empty my God the neighbors ate all the candy well either that or uh no not even Joey eat that much little refresher popcorn shrimp night Joey did you eat all the neighbor candy uh well yeah that was the plan but by the time I got to it there's only a couple pieces left yeah they've been coming by all day they love it they love my candy oh man

I got to go me more hey you might want to make some more lasagna too because something might have happened or a huge chunk of it Ross the neighbors ate all my Candy mine stole my newspaper it it's like a crime wave phebs you uh you got a second sure yeah ever since you uh told me that story about that bike I couldn't stop thinking about it I mean everyone should have a first bike you know so oh my God Ross you like it I love it yeah oh oh go and I love you not

that way but the bike got you a lot closer well well uh take it downstairs you know give it a test drive okay oh my God my first bike thank you for the best present I've ever gotten you're welcome oh and Chandler's about crack I'm not hey dude it's okay I kind of uh got to me a little too yeah I'm I'm just so glad I could make her happy thanks I'm glad I'm not alone on this yeah you yeah you [Music] are who is that don't worry I'm brave I am brave I I am

brave oh no no no no no can you tell me who is there please my name's Gary I live upstairs what hi hi do you know what time it is it's candy time my roommate says that they taste like little drops of Heaven oh please did you hear that little drop to Heaven 400 a.m. so can I get some can I am sorry but some of us have to get up early and go to work he does not know that I am not some of us he can hear me can't he um listen I'm sorry

but I I'll put some out first thing in the morning well okay I'll swing by later you live in this building seems like I would have remembered you night gare is there anybody in this building that does not hit on you smokes a lot lady oh wait that is not [Music] true so did you read your evaluation yet no it was marked confidential I just sent it down to human resources okay please you're kidding right I wrote that one as a joke for you a joke they would appreciate I'm thinking no what did you say

um I said that I thought you were a good kisser and uh and that I liked your teeny tiny tushy no not my tushy well it gets worse when asked if you take initiative I wrote yes he was able to unhook my bra with minimal supervision and under problems with performance I wrote dear God I hope not and then uh and then I drew a little smiley face and then a small pornographic [Music] sketch oh I said it's so sweet of you to get Phoebe that bike when I heard the story I almost cried cried

almost cried huh hear that Chandler almost cried hey you cry every time somebody talks about Titanic those two had only each other B really likes the bike huh oh yeah I saw her walking it down the street the other day she had these flowers in the basket so cute yeah I saw her this morning walking up by the park wait a minute she was walking the bike both times hey thieves oh hi hey sir you enjoying the bike oh uhhuh so much do you uh you do know how to ride a bike don't you of

course can we see you ride it okay [Music] see see this is why I told you never get involved with your assistant and there's no such thing as keeping secrets when it comes to having Affairs did you hear that Chandler no such thing what happened I'm just eating candy maybe it's not as bad as I think you know maybe I didn't take it the way I meant it absolutely you know because tushy can mean both ass and good worker oh I just got to get the thing back hey rage yeah that sketch you mentioned might

it have looked a little something like this oh my God Joey what us to matter with you well I tell you this little Talent came in handy before I go to Ford porn hi I'm sorry I know it's after hours but I really need candy I'm sorry I can't help you see rules are rules please I have people coming from out of town today and I told them all about your candy kidding Out of Towners huh what did you tell them no I told them your candy was absolutely Indescribable well some people have been saying

it's a little drops of heaven but whatever please can't you help me out hey Jan do we know that lady maybe isn't she the woman who lives below you and has sex really loud all right I'll do it just this once but you can't tell anybody yes yes please just give it to me yeah that's thank you unbelievable I I can't believe that sign didn't work you know what would work stop making candy but they like it you mean they like you maybe is that why you became a chef so that people would like you

oh you really want to talk about getting people to like you huh funny man okay now just remember everything I taught you and you'll be fine okay here we go ready set wait this seat is really uncomfortable okay maybe before we start we should just get another one perhaps like an airplane seat or a bean bag chair baby you can't get out of this okay you have to learn how to ride a bike why why do I have to learn well in in case of an emergency what kind of emergency well what if a man

comes along and puts a gun to your head and says you ride this bike or I'll I'll shoot you okay I would ring the bell to distract him and then I would knock the gun out of his hand with a Chinese throwing star okay Pho just just get get on the bike and hey I'll hold you up and and push you okay you won't let go no you swear I swear okay come on all right here we go all right all right all right feel good well all right try pedaling that's it you're doing great

you're doing great yes yes yes take control yes oh oh oh no you swore I I just thought you were doing so well shock shocked it's a leg legitimate learning technique [Music] wow hey there's uh some people outside asking about candy well they're just going to have to wait aren't they I only got two hands need some help no you don't know the system don't need nobody messing with the system by the way the week before your wedding you may not see a lot of me oh hello liar look I I'm I'm really sorry I

let go of the bike I could have been killed I hope you know I know I know but can we please please try it again huh I mean you were so close Phoebe well I would love to but the bike got stolen and the police have no suspects Phoebe what what the hell all right you know what if you are not going to learn how to ride this bike then I'm sorry I'm just going to have to take take it back what why because because it's it's it' be like you having this guitar and and

never playing it okay this guitar wants to be played and and this bike wants to be written and and if you don't write it you're you're you're killing its Spirit the bike is dying all right you care enough to make up that load of crap okay great great you're making the bike very happy Okay Ross please don't die okay I think we can get the evaluation back before they see it but we're going to have to get into Mr zelner office now he doesn't get in until 10:00 so he's no problem but his assistant Betty

she comes in early to eat her breakfast at her desk that's kind of sad yeah well Betty's kind of sad which is why I believe I can lure her away with these chocolates now while I distract her you go in the office got it let's roll hello Rachel you uh got a minute yeah sure Mr zelner for you anything a minute okay great the plan the plan uh actually I'd like to speak to both of you okay uh well can we can we get you anything Mr zelner maybe some chocolates um no thanks but I'll

give these to Betty so I read your evaluation of tag or to use his full name tag sweet cheeks Jones something going on with you twoo my God can can you imagine if there was I mean what would happen exactly well I'd be forced to file a report I'd have to consult with the legal department and your future at the company would be in Jeopardy well uh Mr zelner I'm the one who filled in that evaluation oh no no no yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah I thought it would be funny you wrote that you have

a cute tushi yes I have a weird sense of humor and I'm kind of strangely proud of my butt it's kind of a risky joke tag and what is what is this drawing I can't figure out what this is you're looking at it upside down you you know what doesn't matter hey it's not like I don't have a sense of humor huh hell I even enjoy a naughty Limerick every now and then but there's a time and a place huh unless you uh have a limeric right now no okay well uh you've got my fax

number can't believe you did that that was really sweet ah don't worry about it no you could have lost your job are you kidding me with the cute butt like this I'd F work thank you you're great you know what what I feel great in fact what I it just it took me so long to get that desk [Music] organized there it is [Music] [Applause] what is going on we're waiting for the candy bring out the candy yeah lady give us candy candy Joey what's up buddy what are you doing we need candy get in

here hey and you cannot smoke in [Music] here Merry Christmas okay guys the candy is coming I just need another 15 minutes for the chocolate to cool all right everybody just be quiet be quiet be quiet pip p pip pipe down what is the matter with you people this woman was trying to do a nice thing for you and look at her she is a mess her hair's not brushed she's got dark circles on her eyes chocolate on her face and she is still stunning she was making candy so she could try to get to

know all of you and I'll bet that not one of you can tell me her name am I right candy lady don't candy lady and we know it we have candy all right you know what forget it all of you forget it you've ruined it go home you've ruined it You' ruined it ruin you got ruined everything you ruined it thank you you're welcome did you smoke no smok slot lady blew smoke directly into my my mouth are you okay I'm fine now but it was really scary there for a while I mean someone slipped

a a threatening note under the door oh yeah sorry about that mob mentality or whatever I can't believe it I did it I rode a bik I never thought I'd be able to do that thank you Bross oh hey don't thank me thank yourself you're the one who faced your fears and ultimately overcame them don't be so corny Ross it's not an after school [Applause] [Music] special