The life of Moses but its gnostic

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Parry Megistus
The Gnostic Christians didn’t have nearly as much commentary (different version) on the Exodus as th...
Video Transcript:
hi when we last left off the Israelites had made it to Egypt with the help of their oh so merciful and loving God but while in Egypt the Israelites would be fruitful and multiply over the course of the next 400 years they would become a sizable minority within Egypt and everything would be fine until one day when yalo began to give the Pharaoh vivid dreams of a disaster and so the Pharaoh Enslaved the Israelites and slaughtered the male babies yalo loving irony put his totally original and not at all plagiarized plan into action and one
of the babies would survive when his mother puts him in a basket and hid him among the Reeds on the riverbank of the Nile the daughter of the Pharaoh finds this baby and adopts him as her own the boy would be named Moses and grows up and one day learns the truth that he is in fact a Jew this leads to an identity crisis which ultimately culminates when he sees an Egyptian man abusing a Hebrew slave and kills him at first Moses thinks he did a good thing helping one of his people but then the
next day some Hebrews run away from him calling him a murderer so being rejected by his people and now wanted for murder Moses flees Egypt and wanders the Wilderness ending up in the land of Midian while in his Exile Moses meets some nice people and starts a new life and lives happily ever after that is of course until yalo puts his plan for Egypt into action 40 years after Moses flees Egypt Moses is now a shepherd and leads a flock of his sheep to Mount Orb also known as Mount Si while there yalo appears to
Moses in the form of a burning bush yal Deo tells Moses that he is the god of his ancestors Abraham Jacob and Isaac and that he needs Moses to lead his people out of Egypt into the land of Canaan Moses initially tries to reject this plan because he has no idea who this God is that's talking to him yo tells him his name is simply I am probably out of jealousy for the fact that he is not the most powerful God and bands Moses and the Israelites from using any variation of the word God or
God most high yal deth continues his demands by telling Moses his plan of action after giving Moses a brief rundown Moses returns to his wife and sons and they begin their Trek back to Egypt on the way back to Egypt yal deth gets mad at Moses for some reason and tries to kill him but Moses's wife offers the forkin of her son as a sacrifice to yalo saying truly you are a bride groom of blood to me and for whatever reason this gets y the B to stop this isn't something that was inserted by the
gnostics this just randomly happens in Exodus chapter 4: 24-26 no one knows why God tries to kill Moses in the scene even the gnostics couldn't come up with a reason it just happens and is never addressed again anyway after this Fiasco yal de gives Moses more details on the plan Moses will go to pharaoh and ask for three days off for all of the Jews so they can make a sacrifice to him in the wilderness while on their 3-day vacation they would Escape but before that could happen Pharaoh would say no and God would hit
Egypt with 10 plagues each worse than the last Moses asks yalo two questions first why lie about leaving Egypt for only 3 days if the Jews plan to all leave forever and why 10 plages surely Pharaoh would give up after one or maybe two yal debeth completely Dodges the first question and tells Moses that Pharaoh will see all 10 plagues if for whatever reason Pharaoh tries to back off before then he'll Harden his heart so that Pharaoh won't relent and let them go Moses once again asks why this is at all necessary but yal Theo
never gives a straight up answer so after arriving in Egypt Moses meets with his brother Aaron and the two of them go to the Elders of Israel and fill them in on the plan then Moses and his brother go to the Pharaoh and ask for the 3-day vacation from work the Pharaoh says no and decides to make the slave labor for the Israelites more difficult Aaron then throws his staff on the ground and yal deth turns it into a snake Pho gets his Sorcerers to do the same with their staffs and they also turn into
snakes then Aon staff eats their staffs all according to Y deo's plan the Israelites are suffering even worse and thus Begins the 10 plagues first he turns the water of the Nile into blood Pharaoh says no second frogs Pharaoh then agrees to let the Jews have their three-day break if Moses makes the frogs go away Moses asks yal Bale to oblig and the frogs disappear but Pharaoh then immediately reegs on the steel and so the third plague lice Pharaoh says no flies Pharaoh says no pestilence Pharaoh says no boils and it's at this point the
Pharaoh finally gives up and lets the Jews leave but yal de Beth isn't done torturing the Egyptians as barely anyone has died so far so he hardens Pharaoh's heart and Pharaoh once again refuses to let the Jews go and thus the plagues continue hail Pharaoh says no locusts Pharaoh says no Darkness Pharaoh says no and for the final plague yalo sent the archon of death down to Egypt and killed the firstborn son of every house that did not paint the doors with the blood of a lamb the next day across Egypt the cries of millions
were heard over the G side and finally after 10 plagues yalo allowed pharaoh to let the Jews go but there was one part of the plan that yalo forgot to mention to Moses and so over the next several hours the Israelites would plunder the land of Egypt of its gold and jewels under the command of yalo and then following the lead of yalo the Israelites would be led out of Egypt as yalo traveled as a pillar of clouds and he marched them towards the Red Sea the Israelites began to get nervous because this is the
wrong way and yalo assures them that this is all a part of the plan meanwhile back in Egypt yalo hardened the hearts of the Egyptians and enticed them to attack the Israelites pharaoh and the Egyptians would then take 600 chariots to chase after the Israelites as they are stuck between the Egyptians and the Red Sea the pillar of clouds moves between them Moses then lifts his staff and the Red Sea Parts ways the Israelites are allowed to pass through and once they are far enough the Egyptians follow suit the AL de beo UNP Parts the
sea drowning all of the Egyptians from here here it should have been a short distance to the promised land but the trip was made to feel a lot longer because of the complaining of the Israelites but also under the command of yalo they would make a quick stop at Mount Si for what should have been a brief break however Shenanigans ensued once they arrive at Mount Si yalo calls Moses to go up the mountain so that they could speak together and so Moses leaves Aaron in charge and climbs the mountain and Moses began to speak
to his God yal tells Moses that it is time he fulfilled his promise and delivered the Jews to the promised land but before he could do that he needed one thing and that thing being a place of worship for yo the Tabernacle and so yal Deo would spend the next several days explaining in great detail on how to build the Tabernacle seriously a good chunk of Exodus is just spent describing this thing in intricate detail and once Moses had memorized the right kind of seal skin to use for the Tabernacle yalo began dictating his Commandments
meanwhile at the base of the mountain back with Aaron the Israelites constructed an idol in the shape of a Bull made out of the gold they had stolen from the Egyptians when Moses returned with the stone tablets he engraved The Ten Commandments on he saw the idol and was overtaken with rage and smashed the tablets and returned to the top of the mountain once Moses had returned to the top he had formed yalo of what he had just seen yal deth becomes infuriated and decides to kill everyone there Moses would spend the next several hours
trying to calm yalo down and the two eventually came to an agreement yalo would would only kill the people who constructed and were actively worshiping the idol instead of everyone there and so yal Beth killed some of the Israelites and from here the Israelites would spend the next several days building the Tabernacle as Moses described to them and the spirit of yalo would inhabit it but because yabo was still being emotional about the whole bull Idol incident he produced a blinding light while inside the Tabernacle and the light was so bright that Moses couldn't look
directly at it Moses would spend the next several days trying to help yo get over the whole incident yo was in a mood and kept playing hard to get one day however Aaron's sons used foreign fire when doing a sacrifice to yo this angers yalo until he decides to burn them to death this act of Senseless murder seemed to be just the thing that yalo needed to get his spirits back into shape and Moses was finally allowed to enter the Tabernacle except he had to clean the ash piles that were once his nephews yo didn't
want the seal skin covering to get dirty inside the Tabernacle yalo tells Moses that the Israelites seem to properly worship Him and lays out several needlessly complex rituals and arbitrary laws for them to follow which make up most of Leviticus after doing this for a while yabo was finally calmed down and lets Moses into the tent just cut that part out that doesn't make sense after spending an entire year at Mount Si and dealing with yal deo's mood swings the Israelites were finally back on track to the land of Canaan but immediately the Israelites begin
to complain to Moses once again and after much complaining the israelit arrived at the Wilderness of pan Moses sends some spies ahead to scout the holy land but when the scouts return they report that the land of Canaan is full of big scary Warriors the Israelites refuse to enter the promised land since they don't trust yal Bale to protect them from the big scary Warriors and in all honesty not burning them to death for some arbitrary thing that they may or may not have known about beforehand yal Deo is hurt by this lack of loyalty
and tells the Israelites that they will not enter the promised land and they are thus sent to wander the desert for 40 years and over the next 40 years the Israelites would have several Misadventures at one point a group called The Levites tried to Rebel seeo smited them at one point the Israelites would run out of water so yalo tells Moses to tap a stone with a staff so that water will come out Moses does this and takes partial credit for the miracle yo decides to put Moses into his place and tells him that he
also won't enter the promised land either thus ending Moses and yala's friendship as the Israelites wandered the desert they would not stop complaining with many of them asking to go back to Egypt yalo in a fit of rage then send snakes to attack them Moses begs yalo for Mercy yalo takes pity on them and tells Moses to build a bronze staff with a snake on it and anyone who looks at that snake would have their snake bites healed another time they would reach the plains of Moab where a pagan King named balum tries to curse
the Israelites beh all the be won't let him but after all of those Misadventures and after 40 years the Israelites once again returned to the the edge of the promised land and Moses gives his final sermon among the new generation after which he walks up on top of a mountain and dies so the gnostics really didn't do extensive commentaries past the book of Exodus but there were still some comments on various passages on the Old Testament which to the ancient gnostics was proof that the Old Testament God was evil and we know which of these
verses were used by the gnostics because of what the early church father said about them so let's do a quick lightning round for the rest of the Old Testament throughout the book of Joshua yalo has the Israelites invade the land of Canaan slaughtering many innocent people in the process the Book of Judges is basically a cycle of the Israelites and yalo bickering back and forth in 1 Samuel yalo outright calls for genocide also in 1 Samuel yth puts an evil spirit inside King Saul so that he would try to kill David in First Kings we
get a detailed description of the Throne of God and how he operates as he's planning to Murder King Ahab it reads a lot like a mafia gang with with each Angel giving different ideas on how to do it and God contemplating which one is the best course of action in Second Kings the Prophet Elijah calls on an angel in the name of Jehovah and it brings down fire from heaven and consumes two captains and 100 men while they beg for mercy this is multiple war crimes by the way also in Second Kings a group of
42 children make fun of the privit Elisha calling him bald yalo responds by sending two bears to Maul them to death Elisha was in fact bald by the way there's also the entirety of the Book of Job which is basically just a bet between God and the devil to see if job is actually loyal enough to stay with God after having all of his stuff burned and his family killed there's also the fact that in the Book of Job Satan is among God's angels in the Heavenly Council there's the infamous line in Isaiah where God
literally says that he is the creator of evil in Ezekiel he admits to deliberately tricking His prophets in Jonah he apologizes and admits fault for having committed evil something he does surprisingly throughout the entirety of the Bible and it's for reasons like this that gnostics like valentineus didn't actually consider Yahweh to be holy evil and that covers the Old Testament tune in next time for the arrival of Jesus in his final battle with yal de beo
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